The Unicorn

Unicorns were said to be avatars of purity and innocence. It was thus not a surprise that the unicorn took one look at Weiss, snorted, and kept right on walking.

"Hey!" Weiss growled. "Where do you think you're going?"

The unicorn stopped and raised its metaphorical eyebrow at her.

Weiss huffed. "What's that supposed to mean? I'll have you know that I am a princess, completely untouched by man, and –"

The unicorn kicked some dirt at her and then kicked some more dirt at Ruby before raising its metaphorical eyebrow again.

"What?" Weiss looked at Ruby and then back at the unicorn. "That counts?"

The unicorn nodded.

"Hmmm..." Yang snickered and patted Weiss on the head. "Well, princess, the legends do say that unicorns will only allow an innocent maiden to ride upon their back. After what you and Ruby have been doing? Yeah. You're not innocent or a maiden."

Weiss's eye twitched. "Seriously?"

"I mean, it's a good thing, right?" Yang was fighting not to laugh. "You've had to put up with other members of the nobility not taking your relationship with Ruby serious, but not this unicorn. Yep. She's an equal opportunity unicorn. You and Ruby might be two women, but you two getting busy counts just as much as you getting busy with a man."

"But the lore I read specified only that the rider had to be untouched by man."

"Weiss, who do you think wrote that lore, and how long ago do you think it was written?"

"..." Weiss sighed. "You might have a point." She looked back at the unicorn. "I don't suppose you know a less discerning unicorn, do you? Possibly one who wouldn't mind someone who's only... slightly no longer a maiden?"

The unicorn gave her the flattest of flat looks.

"Yeah, you're not just slightly no longer a maiden," Yang said as Weiss and Ruby both did wonderful impressions of tomatoes. "You're forgetting how keen Blake's hearing is."

The cat Faunus sighed. "Weiss, you and Ruby go at it every night. You're not fooling anyone with your 'we need a room to ourselves to discuss matters of great import to our adventuring group'. If you're only slightly no longer a maiden, then the Great Desert of Unbelievable Horror and Woe is only slightly horrible."

"We're not that bad!" Weiss protested. The Great Desert of Unbelievable Horror and Woe was essentially a death zone. Anyone who set foot in it and didn't die in the first twenty-four hours was essentially a heroic legend. To date no one had ever lasted longer than three days.

"Weiss," Blake said with another long suffering sigh. "If I hear you scream even one more time about how you want Ruby to 'make you feel like a woman' again, I am going to stab someone."

"..." Ruby's mouth opened and closed, but her brain was sadly on hiatus.

The unicorn took pity on Weiss and nodded in another direction.

"There's another unicorn that way that might let me ride them?" Weiss said.

The unicorn nodded and trotted off.

"Thank you." Weiss turned her nose up at Yang and Blake. "At least someone here has some manners." She huffed. "Besides, it's not like either of you would have been able to ride this unicorn either."

"Well, yeah, but we're not the ones claiming to be all pure and maidenly." Yang laughed. "And do we really need a unicorn?"

"Of course, we need a unicorn. Everyone knows that riding a unicorn into battle is one of the best ways to kill a demon lord."

"Technically," Yang pointed out. "Salem would be more of a Demon Empress."

"Whatever. Let's just go find that other unicorn."

Five minutes later, they stumbled across the animal in question. It was not a unicorn. Oh no. It was a bicorn, a beast very similar to a unicorn but with two crucial differences. It had two horns... and it could only be ridden by someone who was most definitely not innocent or a maiden.

"That stupid unicorn," Weiss hissed.

X X X

Author's Notes

As always, I do not own RWBY. I'm not making any money off of this either.

The unicorn knows what's up! *Insert eyebrow waggle.* But, seriously, just a bit of fun. And, hey, in these modern times, who's to say that unicorns won't also become more discerning? Sure, Weiss is technically untouched by man, but she sure as heck isn't untouched by woman (i.e., Ruby).

Also, if you've enjoyed my fan fiction, you should check out my original fiction. You can find me on Amazon and Audible as L. G. Estrella. I've just recently released The Sheep Dragon, which is a collection of short stories set in The Unconventional Heroes Series. If you enjoy humour, fun, and adventure, check it out.

As always, I appreciate feedback. Reviews and comments are welcome.