Chapter 222
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Note: D'Hoffryn is from "Buffy the vampire slayer." The other characters are historical figures.
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D'Hoffryn's plans to exploit Lenin and John Brown had not gone according to plan. Those two had never been weak, they were always willing to engage in a little vegence when it advanced their agendas. But, it seemed they had figured out a tiny flaw in their war. Namely that their side was fighting for nable causes, they were fighting for others more than themselves. This meant that their soldiers were more likely to get into Heaven quicker, those who fought only for themselves and their own pleasure would be stuck here in Hell. This meant that one army would dwindle over time, the other would likely increase their numbers as desertions became more common. Now, Brown and Lenin were trying a new tactic, non-violence. D'Hoffryn's position of power in Hell was based on his ability to keep souls obsessed with vengeance, keep them doing Evil and thus stuck here. If more people embraced pacifist principals, they might get into Heaven while D'Hoffryn lost his power. D'Hoffryn decided he needed to expand his own allies, he reached out to Lenin's old friend Stalin, and Vlad the impaler. Both had done some very brutal tactics in their own worlds, both deluded themselves into thinking they were only doing what was neccessary for their respective peoples. They were exactly the kind of people who might be willing to follow D'Hoffryn's lead.
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Stalin: Lenin used to look down on the meshevicks and other "moderates." I cannot believe he has suddenly become a pacifist.
D'Hoffryn: Perhaps he is just trying to get into Heaven himself. He used to be an agent of Evil.
Stalin: So I heard. Perhaps he is just frustrated over the war, losing so many of his own while Galt and the romans expand their numbers.
Vlad: We need to make our enemies more afraid of us than of the Lake of fire. When I began my rebellion against the Ottoman empire, the sultan sent a great general against me. This was the same man who had conquered Constantinople less than a decade ago. I knew I couldn't defeat him militarily. So, I took the turkish soldiers I had prisoner, and impaled them on the road. The general would have to see this on his way to Wallachia. He and his soldiers were so frightened by this, the possibility of dying like this, that the general just took his army and went home.
Stalin: Yes, this could work. During the great patriotic war, I ordered aid cut off to any family members of those who collaborated with the nazies. Assuming that Galt and the others have ones they care about, we can use them as leverage to encourage desertions.
Vlad: Sounds good to me.
D'Hoffryn: I can get some of their soldiers after the next battle, try to persuade them to fight for you two rather than for Lenin or Brown. I need better allies than those two, I need you two. You will both have positions of power after Galt is defeated.
Vlad; We will create order, punishing only those who deserve it, making our kingdom safe for the law abiding.
D'Hoffryn: Sounds like a plan.