Sho didn't always understand Big Sis.
He didn't understand a lot of things about her. Like why she only drank strawberry milk when chocolate milk was much better. Or why she had so many clothes even though there were only seven days in a week. Or why she actually liked taking baths even though she had to spend hours and hours combing her hair. Or why she drank all the time even though it made you get dizzy, throw up, and sometimes fall asleep in weird places….
Like the bathtub.
Sho especially didn't understand why she was sleeping in the bathtub. She had come home from Japan last night, Dad wasn't back yet, but Sho wasn't worried. The best thing that could have happened was Dad's plane crashed into the ocean and sharks got him. Big Sis was probably worried about him, that was why she had drank so much that she had fallen asleep in the bathtub. Sho kicked an empty can away. Gross. He didn't understand why she would drink something so gross. Sure it made you feel good for a little bit but then you go dizzy and threw up and you felt sick when you woke up the next day.
So maybe it was best not to wake her up.
He didn't know what to do. He really needed to brush his teeth and pee and stuff but he couldn't if she was in the room. That would have been really weird. But he didn't know if he could wake her up either. She was snoring, that deep asleep, and Sho hated it when people woke him up when he was that deep asleep. He could have gone over to Fukuda's house but then he would have been stuck spending the whole day with Fukuda…he needed a break. Fukuda could be kind of annoying something. He could have gone over to Shimazaki's house…but it was weird hanging out with him since he and big sis were boyfriend and girlfriend now. There was always Shibata and Tsuchiya…but they were always kissing and hugging and stuff. There was always Serizawa…but then he'd be stuck playing boring videogames all day.
So maybe he had to wake her up….maybe that was the thing to do…he didn't know.
"Hey, Big Sis?" asked Sho as he poked her on the top of the head. She groaned and swatted his hand away.
"…sleeping…" muttered Big Sis
"Come on, wake up." Said Sho as he poked her again. That time she swatted him away and turned over….what the….
"What the fuck!?" shouted Sho. That woke her up. She shot up like Mukai's jack-in-the-box. She had a big black eye and her lip was split and she had blood all down the front of her shirt…what the fuck?! No…there was no way…he had no idea...someone had hurt his Big Sis! Someone had hurt her and-and he hadn't been there to protect her!
She shouldn't have left….and he shouldn't have left her.
"What?! What's happening? Sho, are you ok?!" asked Big Sis. She leaned forwards and took him by his shirt. He pulled himself free before she could stretch it out.
"Me?! What in the hell are you worried about me for?! You're the one covered in blood!" said Sho. Big Sis gasped and looked down. She tried to turn her head around like an owl so she could see her back. She wasn't an owl, though, so all she did was end up hurting her back. He didn't know why she was trying to turn into an owl for, though, since the blood was all down the front of her shirt.
"What's with you? The bloods on the front of you shirt…unless you got beat up. Did someone beat you up? Who was it? I'll-" said Sho
"Dad didn't beat me up…he just hit me." Said Big Sis. Sho…did not yell. He wanted to yell and scream and…and he didn't even know. He was tired. He was tired of Dad and…and how much of an asshole he was…
"Dad's a dick hole, you know that." said Sho. He wanted to beat Dad up…but nobody had ever beaten Dad up for him. Dad had spent years beating him up over and over again. Nobody had ever beaten Dad up for him…but Big Sis had made him stop…but Sho couldn't just tell Dad to stop! He wasn't Big Sis. Dad didn't like him and….and Sho wasn't strong enough and-and-and…
And he didn't want a hug right now!
"But it's…I'm sorry! I'm sorry that I make you sad and I love you. You're the best little brother un the whole world, you know that?" asked Big Sis. She tried to reach over the tub to hug him. He took a step back. The last thing he needed right now was a hug. He needed…he didn't know what he needed. To grow up faster. He needed to grow up right now so he could go and beat Dad up…but he couldn't…
There was nothing that he could do.
He took a step back and Big Sis fell forwards. She hung half in the tub and half out of it. He helped her back up with her powers. She was crying now and…and he'd made her cry…or maybe Dad had. Yeah, this was all Dad's fault. Sho hoped that his plane sank into the ocean. He hoped that Dad never came back, never, even if he didn't die. He hoped that Dad had ran away from home.
If mom's could run away then so could dads.
"Come on, you have to get out of the tub." Said Sho. Big Sis shook her head and leaned back. Sho took a step forward, just one, in case she tried to hug him again. She didn't. She just leaned back and wiped her eyes. Good. Maybe now he could get her out of the tub and then…he didn't know…make her a glass of strawberry milk? Other nice little brother stuff? Milk wouldn't fix this, nothing would fix this. The way she felt never really went away. It just got less…sharp…as time went by.
But he could still do his best.
"Come on." Said Sho as he held out his hands. She took them and he pulled her up until she was standing. She shook a little as she stood…he made sure to help keep her steady as he got her out of the tub. He slipped a little on the bathmat as he helped her out but he caught himself with his powers. She didn't catch him. She didn't seem ok enough to catch him.
She didn't seem ok at all.
She could barely stand. She had to put her hand on the wall for support. This was why Sho didn't drink that often. He didn't get her, or anyone. There was no point in making yourself sick like that. Especially when you had a rebellion to plan…but she didn't know about that. She couldn't know about that…there was no way she ever would have been on his side. She loved Dad and Dad loved her…or at least he had loved her. Now he was back to hitting her, hard enough to make her bleed even. That was…well not good but…but maybe he could get her on his side now.
She was drunk, too, so maybe she'd be better at listening. Drunk people were good listeners, they usually did what you told them to do.
"Sho…I've got to tell you something….and it's important." Said Big Sis
"Wait, ok? I have to tell you something too." Said Sho. This was it. Fukuda was wrong, Big Sis was going to join them. Then they could work together and then they could take Dad down. She was almost as string as Dad was, she was a lot closer to him than Sho had ever been, and she had actual power in Claw. She was going to help them and Fukuda was wrong and…and this was going to be great!
"You shouldn't." said Big Sis. Sho…it was amazing how fast he could go from feeling great to feeling like someone had kicked him in the stomach. She…she was just being bossy, that was all. She had always been really bossy and…and he could say whatever he wanted to say! She didn't just get to…to interrupt him and stuff!
"Don't tell me what I can and can't say. Don't be bossy." Said Sho
"No, no, no. It's not about being bossy to you, it's because…because I shouldn't talk to you. When I talk to you it makes you sad…because you think that I stole Shimazaki from you and also because-" said Big Sis
"I don't care about him, you can have him. He doesn't like me, he never liked me, and anyway I don't like him anymore. He's not brave enough to…to go up against Dad." Said Sho
"Nobody is. Dad is…he's really strong and really mean and…and he's a jerk. Sho, I have to tell you something. Dad-" said Big Sis
"Yeah, I know that Dad's a jerk. That's why we have to stop him...you want to stop him, right?" asked Sho. He expected her to say 'yes' or to at least ask him what he was talking about but instead she was just staring at him….what was she staring at?
"Wait…you know about his girlfriend?" asked Big Sis. Sho…must have been losing his hearing. Yeah, that was it. That was the only thing that made sense here. He was losing his hearing or maybe his mind…did they still have ear cleaners? He'd try those first…then he'd have Fukuda fix his brain…or maybe hers since she was the one talking crazy talk.
"His what now?" asked Sho as she cleaned his ear with his finger. She must have meant something else. There was no way…that was crazy. That was the craziest thing that he had ever heard…and he'd heard it twice…and it sounded even crazier coming out of her mouth than Fukuda's….he had said the same thing…
But he had been wrong.
Dad…he didn't have a girlfriend. Sho knew about girlfriends. They were like Pokemon. First they were friends and then if you gave them enough love and candy they would evolve into girlfriends and then their final evolution was wives. Then when you got a nursey you would get babies…only they were human babies and didn't come from eggs. If Dad had a girlfriend then she would become a wife and then Sho would have another sister…or a brother. A little brother to inherit the world. A little brother to kick him out of the family….the only reason Dad had kept him around for this long was because he didn't have any other sons and Mom wasn't ever coming back….so if he got a little brother then….
That wasn't going to be happening because girls didn't like Dad.
"His girlfriend. Her name is Shiori and she lives in Osaka and she's really mean and she wants to have a baby with Dad!" said Big Sis. A baby…so Big Sis new…the idea was starting to sound less and less crazy the more times she said it.
"She said what?" asked Sho. So Big Sis had met this lady…but that didn't mean that she was Dad's girlfriend. That just meant that…maybe Dad was just following her around to try and kiss her or whatever else he wanted to do…disgusting. So disgusting but…but as long as she wasn't going to marry him and she wasn't going to have their brother and sister then…then this was ok…the whole thing did sound crazy though….
Almost too crazy to believe.
"She wants to have a baby with Dad…or maybe not, I couldn't tell…but if she does have a baby then we're going to be orphans! I don't want us to be orphans!" said Big Sis
"We're…no. No way. You're drunk. Dad isn't going to have another kid and he doesn't have a girlfriend. Girls don't like Dad." Said Sho with a wave of his hand. Drunk people talked a lot of crazy talk. Dad wasn't going to marry anyone let alone have another kid with him. He was mean and weird and he always smelled like breakfast. Girls didn't like guys like him. Sho knew girls, he had been chased down and kissed by enough of them to know how they thought, and he knew that no girl would have wanted to so much as hold Dad's hand let alone….all of that disgusting stuff….Big Sis was drunk and she didn't know what she was saying.
"He had you, me, and Mukai. Girls like him. This girl, lady, really likes him and…and Dad hates me now. He hates me. He said that-" said Big Sis
"Then help me stop him!" said Sho
"I tried that but he wouldn't come with me, I think he's going to stay in Osaka with her…" said Big Sis
"No, I mean we can take him down. We can take him and all of Claw down and-" said Sho. He didn't get to finish his thought. Big Sis covered his mouth with one hand, thought for a second, and then put her other hand over his mouth too. He licked her but she was immune now. That hadn't worked since they had been kids. He wanted to push her away but then she would have fallen and maybe even died…and he didn't want her dead. He didn't even want her to be hurt.
He just wanted her on his side…but that didn't look like it was going to happen.
"Sho! Don't say things like that! You know what Dad does to people who talk like that and…and you're not making sense anyway. Dad did a bad thing and we're probably going to wind up as orphans now and Mukai…well she has a mom so she'll be ok…but…but don't talk like that! Just because Dad is a bad person that doesn't mean that Claw is a bad place. We can still take over the world and make it better, not just for our family and friends but all the espers in the world! We can't give all of that up just because Dad decided that he…that he wanted to try again…and that he doesn't need us anymore." Said Big Sis. She was talking crazy…that was because she was drunk. She was drunk and she didn't know what she was saying…or maybe she did. Shimazaki had told him that drinking was the closest thing that there was to truth serum in the world…
So this was how she really felt.
Dad…Dad was a dick hole. He had been a dick hole to Sho since they day he'd been born. Dad had never forgiven him for the doctor cutting him out of Mom's stomach and he had never forgiven him for not being like Big Sis and he had never forgiven him for being gay…well Sho didn't need his forgiveness. He didn't need anything from Dad….anything but the look on his face when he realized that Sho, his least favorite kid, the kid he had always thought was worthless, had taken all of Claw down! That was all he needed and…and….
And he needed to get out of here.
He shook his head free and took a step back. The hamper had been behind him, he hadn't seen it, and it feel down. Something broke…Big Sis had left a bottle on top of it. Well then she could clean it up. He had to go. He had to get out of here before he said something he regretted or did something….or broke something…or someone. He just….he had to get the fuck out of here!
Before he did something mean to Big Sis.
"Sho! Wait! Where are you going?!" asked Big Sis. She tried to follow him but he put up a barrier. She had been about to step in the broken glass. If she did that then she would have had to see Fukuda and then Fukuda would have agreed with her about Dad having a girlfriend and…and the bigger problem would have been Fukuda being all jerky and stuff to Big Sis and…and he just…he didn't want to have to worry about her right now! He didn't want to have to worry about anything!
He just wanted to take a piss and start his day!
"To Fukuda's! Just…stay out of the glass and….and go sleep in the bathtub! I'm sorry I woke you!" said Sho. She tried to say something else but he wouldn't let her. He just walked away and slammed the door. At least now he couldn't hear her. At least now…now he had to get out of here. He didn't stop to put his coat on, or his shoes, or even something other than his pajamas. He just walked, more like ran, down the hall to Fukuda's house and let himself in.
It still wasn't enough distance.
He could still sense Big Sis, hear her voice in his head, the words that she'd…he could hear it all echoing in his brain. Big Sis had…she had said so much and….and it didn't make sense! If it didn't make sense then he didn't want it in his head! He was not getting another Mom. He didn't even…he didn't even know if he still wanted the one he had and….and he didn't want a little brother! Not anymore…when he had been little he'd wanted a little brother more than anything else in the world. He had wanted to be the one in charge, the big brother, but…but now he knew better…he knew that if he had a little brother then his whole life would have been over and…and anyway Sho was already a big brother and….and their family was big enough!
Three kids was enough! One boy was enough! No mom was enough!
"Sho, what brings you….oh God, what happened?" asked Fukuda as he came out of the kitchen. He wasn't dressed yet…nobody was dressed yet! It was still early in the morning and….and it was too early for all of this shit! He just…he should have let her sleep and…and….
And he didn't want to deal with this right now!
"Sho, come one, talk to me." Said Fukuda as he put his hand on Sho's shoulder. He shrugged it off and shook his head. Fukuda was trying to talk to him, one of their big important talks, but Sho didn't want to talk about anything. He didn't want to talk about things that were important or not important or-or anything!
"I don't want to talk about it." Said Sho. That should have been enough….not wanting to talk should ave been enough!
"So there's something to talk about?" asked Fukuda
"I…just….yes! No….I don't know! Big Sis is just…she's being all drunk and crazy!" said Sho. Fukuda eyes narrowed. He put his hand on Sho's back and walked him out of the genkan. Sho tried to push his hand away but he kept it there. He could feel Fukuda's aura, his powers…but he wasn't even sick!
"Stop it! I'm fine! You should go and…and fix her! She's drunk and her face is all messed up and she's got blood on her shirt and-and she's talking like she has brain worms!" said Sho
"Sho your sister…if she needs me then she knows where to find me. I'm more concerned about you? You…you didn't have anything to drink, right? If you did I promise I won't be mad at you but you need to tell me-" said Fukuda
"Oh my God, you know I didn't! You can tell with your powers anyway and-and it tastes really bad and makes you sick and you get dizzy and throw up and pass out in the bathtub and then when you wake up you say crazy things! Like about Dad having a girlfriend and-" said Sho
"What about your Dad now?" asked Fukuda quickly.
"That he has a girlfriend. Big Sis was talking about her. She says that his girlfriend lives in Osaka and-" said Sho as Fukuda lead him through the apartment…had been leading him. He stopped right in his tracks…and his aura got weird. Not like he was trying to heal Sho but like Fukuda was trying to heal himself…or something.
"She actually spoke to Shiori?" asked Fukuda, voice coming out like he'd just ran a marathon or something. Sho didn't get it. It was crazy but not that crazy. Not unless you believed Big Sis's crazy stories…the crazy story that Fukuda had been telling for a while…Big Sis must have heard it from him, yes, that was it….that must have been it….
"No…because she isn't real. This whole thing is just something you made up. Big Sis heard you telling stories and that's how she came up with all of this crazy stuff. Stuff like how Dad's going to have another kid and he hates her and he's staying with-" said Sho
"Shiori's pregnant!?" asked Fukuda. His aura flared out and hit Sho. It actually hurt. Fukuda's aura normally felt good but…but this was crazy. This whole thing was completely insane and…and it wasn't really happening. That was all.
"No…because none of this is….is really happening…" said Sho. Fukuda…oh no. Fukuda was getting down on his knees so he and Sho were eye to eye…nothing good ever came of Fukuda and Sho being eye to eye liked this….
"Sho. Shiori is real. This is happening. This is…did your sister say, for sure, if Shiori was pregnant. Sho…if this is true then…then this is going to be very bad for all of us. If your Dad has another son then…then your life is going to become very difficult-" said Fukuda
"No it's not because he's not having another kid! He can't! We-we already have three kids in our family and…and I don't need another sister and I don't even want a little brother and-and-and get out of my way! Have to pee right now! That's why I came over! Big Sis is sleeping in the bathtub and…and I couldn't get her out and-and I don't even know if this lady is going to have a baby or not and…and none of this…this is all too crazy to be real!" shouted Sho. He tried to step to the side but Fukuda grabbed him by the shoulders…not good.
"Let me go!" said Sho
"Sho…not until…you need to admit that this is real and…and…I don't know. There's nothing I can do…there's something I can…" said Fukuda. He looked away. Sho didn't know why and he didn't care. He saw his opening and he went for it. He pulled himself away from Fukuda and pushed him down. He could hear his hamsters freaking out….they needed him. They needed him and loved him and all he was doing was freaking them out and…and he had to….he didn't have to sit here and listen to this!
"Sho! Wait! We have to talk about this!" said Fukuda. No! Sho didn't want to talk to him about this or-or anything!
"No we don't! I don't want to talk about-about anything! Dad doesn't have a girlfriend and-and if you want to talk about crazy stuff than do it with Big Sis!" said Sho as he ran to the bathroom. He slammed the door as hard as he could, hard enough to rattle the stuff on the counter. The can of shaving cream rolled off the counter and hit the floor. Sho kicked it away.
It exploded.
He had put his powers into it and then it exploded and…and that was ok. This wasn't his bathroom. He didn't have to clean it up….not this bathroom and not his own, either. Big Sis…she was the one who liked clean stuff and…and so did Dad and…and he just…Sho sat down on the floor. He covered his head and brought his knees up to his chest.
He didn't know.
He didn't know what he was going to do. He didn't know what he was going to…what he could do…if Dad had another baby then…then he didn't know. He didn't want a little brother. He loved his little sister and his big sister and…and he knew that if he got a little brother then he'd love him. He'd love his brother and he'd hold him and feed him and take care of him like he had done with his little sister and with his hamsters and stuff. He would have loved his brother…the brother who would take everything from him.
If he had a brother then he….then Dad wouldn't need him at all.
He'd be sent away. If Dad had another boy then he'd send Sho to one of the other HQs or another division or…or something. He wouldn't ever see Big Sis again…as bossy and crazy and mean as she was she loved him and he loved her. He would never have seen Little Sis again either…or any of his friends…even Shimazaki. He…he didn't know what he'd do if he got sent away. He didn't know how he would…who he'd talk to and…and…if Dad had another kid then Sho couldn't take Dad down. The baby wouldn't understand if Dad was hurt or…or dead…
The baby would have loved Dad.
The baby would have loved Dad the way Sho used to love Dad. The baby would have been just this little person who didn't know anything about anything. A person who…maybe the baby would turn out to be real jerk or something…no, no, no. Babies were never jerks. He liked babies and…and he wanted there to be another baby or something…but like if it got left on their doorstep or something. Not like…like if he…not like if he…he couldn't breathe. He couldn't move. He just…he rocked back and forth.
It didn't help.
He didn't know what could help…he didn't know what to do. This couldn't have been real. This couldn't have been in any way real because….because girls didn't like Dad. Mom had run away. Mukai's mom had run away. Girls didn't like Dad at all and…and Sho could breathe again. There was no way a girl would hold Dad's hand or kiss him let alone…Sho had probably kissed more people in his life than Dad had! Sho knew girls and they didn't like guys like Dad and…and everything was going to be ok….
Sho didn't understand how Big Sis could have come up with something like that.