(A/N)- First off, I would like to apologize terribly for the awful pun that is the title of this little collection. I'm sorry.

Secondly, welcome dear readers! As stated in the summary, this story is a collection of Fate AUs in varying flavors, exploring different little scenarios the anons on Tumblr think up for me. Most of them fall under a general "Saber is revived in present day and makes her way back to Shirou" sort of premise, though I will note it if otherwise. Expected ships will be mostly canon, with quite a bit of Shirou/Saber as that's my favorite and you can't take it away from me. This first chapter is one such item of the aforementioned premise, anon having called for "Shirou and Saber spar in the dojo and things get... ah... heated". I'll not keep you much longer and let you get to it.

I hope you enjoy your stay.

Disclaimer: Get used to seeing these, darlings. I have way too much fun writing them. (And not so much fun not owning my fandoms but hey, what can you do?)

Fascination

Their training swords smacked against each other with wooden thunks, rapid and quick, punctuated only by their heavy breathing and the occasional pained grunt from Shirou as Saber nailed him.

"You're getting… faster, Shirou…" Saber huffed between blows.

Shirou managed a grin, blowing the sweat-drenched strands of hair out of his face before replying, "It's because I have an excellent teacher of course."

Saber turned her face aside with a demure blush, even as she dodged one of Shirou's overhand swings. "Flattery won't help you win," she teased.

The boy frowned and drove forward, striking horizontally towards her flank. "That's mean, Saber. Here I was trying to compliment you and you throw it back in my face," he complained.

"Just because I love you doesn't mean I'm going to take it easy on you in training," she told him, a wry smirk spreading across her face.

His eyes gleamed mischievously at her. "Guess I'll just have to try harder then."

He pushed more power to his blows, drawing upon some reserve of strength he'd been holding back. Saber was impressed, and found herself giving a bit of ground as they traded blows. Even as she defended, she couldn't help but be mesmerized by him. The sweat dripping down his face, the way his brows furrowed in concentration, the determination in his brown eyes, and the set of his lips in their stoic frown. They parted softly to let air in and out, puckered as he felt one of his strikes get easily deflected, pressed together tightly as he focused. She stared at his mouth in fascination, every little movement captivating her.

Her distraction let Shirou finally knock her bokken aside and grab hold of her wrist before she could raise it again, pulling her closer to him. "Gotcha!" he declared triumphantly.

She merely closed the distance between them, her free hand going to the back of his head as she pressed her mouth to his.

Shirou made a startled noise, his eyes going wide in surprise. He stood there dumbly a moment, his cognitive functions grinding to a halt. Saber pressed to his chest, her lips warm, her body soft. The bokken dropped from his hand as he reached for her, cupping her face and deepening the kiss.

She wrapped her arms around him, sighing into his mouth. Her fingers loosened on her own sword and as Shirou's fingers brushed back through her hair she let it fall with a small hollow plink to the floor.

-FSN-

Rin strode the hallway, humming softly to herself. She steered towards the dojo. It was getting late; Shirou and Saber had been in there all afternoon. If the household was going to get dinner on time, Shirou would have to pull himself away from training now, so he could shower and get cleaned up before preparing their meal.

She rounded the corner and swung around the doorway to the dojo, a playful greeting already on her lips but stopped dead just shy of the threshold, her eyes widening.

Shirou and Saber weren't training. They were moaning, tongue deep in each other's mouths, and Saber appeared to be trying to pull Shirou's shirt off.

…Possibly his pants too.

Rin took a small step back, averting her eyes, and cleared her throat awkwardly.

The couple broke apart instantly, flushing red and leaping several feet away from each other.

"R-Rin!" Saber stammered. "My apologies for your catching us in such an… indecent manner."

Rin was smirking now, her arms crossed in front of her. "It's fine, Saber." She glanced over to Shirou, whose face was beet red and who was pointedly not looking at Saber. "Do you want to come make dinner, Shirou or…" She raised an eyebrow teasingly. "…do you two need a minute?"

He coughed, waving his hand. "I'll be right out, Rin," he said in a small, strained voice.