A/n-Hello all, as promised, here's my whacking what if fic where I ask the question. Could the ending written by D and D possibly be worse? (no), and more importantly, how would T Cregan fucking Stark stop his family name from dying? This chapter is the prologue to that idea. We also get to see some fan favs make their return and look at my take on Westeros' religious aspect. Please read the notes at the end for some warnings about the future chapters.
Side Note. To reach this afterlife you have to be dead for at least six months. So that is why Jon did not get here and is why we will not see Jaime, Cersei, or Dany yet
The Return of the Old Man of The North
Prologue-Family grievances
"And who has a better story than Bran the Broken."
"ANYONE" shouted Daemon Targaryen, The Rogue Prince.
It was one of the few times that Cregan had to agree. What made it worse was that Brandon, one of his descendants, was about to be made king, yet he felt no joy.
"The northern lords will not accept a southern ruler anymore. We suffered too much," Said Sansa, another one of his descendants.
"What she really means is that she wants to be queen… she always wanted to be queen," Said Visenya Targaryen. a bitter woman, but again she was right.
Flash forward to Tyrion informing Jon that he is being sent to the wall
"You will take no lands, father no children…."
"NO, NO NO NO. HE IS YOUR RIGHTFUL KING. YOU ENCOURAGED HIM TO KILL HER. YOU SHOULD BE OFF TO THE WALL, NOT HIM." It was Maegor the cruel losing his temper now, and again Cregan had to agree…he was right. Although it wasn't the imp's fault that this Jon Snow was so easy to manipulate. Nor was it a good sign that Maegor the kinslayer was supporting him.
"Can't you see Uncle Maegor? It's his Stark blood that has made him so weak. If he was a true dragon, like us, then he would strangle the half-man, kill the eunuch, find drogon and claim the kingdoms for himself." Sneered The Mad King, the man who got his own house off the throne, said while staring over at the dead Starks nearby.
"Come over here and say that to my face Aerys and I'll cut your throat as that oathbreaking kingslayer did all those years ago." Said Robb Stark in return. A descendant Cregan respected for the most part.
"Do not talk to us about oathbreaking, boy. If you had just kept that bitch of yours as a mistress instead of marrying her, you might still be alive, and so would your house." Responded Aegon the Unworthy, perhaps not seeing the irony in his statement or maybe speaking from his inferior former life hobbies.
"And if you had kept your little fat cock between your legs, then maybe the lords of the lands would have taken longer to realize just how weak House Targaryen was without dragons. Do not pretend your selfish actions didn't cause five fucking rebellions. Aegon, out of everyone here, you earned your name the most." Replied Aemon the Dragonknight, a man Cregan saw in high regard but was still surprised to see showed his contempt for his craven brother so openly.
Aegon then turned to his legendary brother, looking like he would explode from anger, and said. "Do not pretend you did not have a bastard yourself, dear brother. You know as well as I do that Daemon wasn't mine."
"Considering he was known as Daeron the Good, every bone in my body would say no, but he is from your limbs, just as much as Daemon and Bittersteel were. I kept to my vow, but we are dead now, so now I can say and do whatever I want to you." Replied Aemon.
As the Targaryen brothers were in a standoff - one toned and muscular and the other fat and rotting, Cregan noticed Catelyn Stark smirk as down in Westeros. "Jon Snow," the boy she hated for all those years, was kneeling to his broken cousin and apologizing for not being there for him.
He still remembered the day Catelyn Stark, the woman who let their most valuable hostage go in the dead of night in the middle of a war, had her last confrontation with this "Jon Snow." Saying that it should have been him, referring to her now kingly son falling from a tower, and again, Cregan agreed.
It should have been Jon….just not in the way she would have liked.
Her smirk grew bigger as Jon put on his cloak again and headed off, off to swear away any threat he had to his cousin's crowns. He was disappointed at Arya's behavior but had expected as much from Sansa and Bran. Cregan thought she would fight to have Jon come with her, not for him to throw away his life again, but no, she clearly did not care.
That smirk died when Jon had a discussion with the two Night's Watchmen. They referred to him as Lord Commander. which led to Jon releasing them from their vows, saying that since the Night King was gone and the "Freefolk" as he called them were now allies, they were not needed anymore and were free to go about as they pleased.
Cregan noticed a few heads nod in agreement to Jon's decision, and some outright approved of this change. However, some were annoyed that Jon had been sent to the wall again in the first place, most notably Aegon Targaryen, who had been watching from a distance as all this unfolded. Cregan mused that his last living relative bending the knee to the last of the male Stark's was his breaking point.
The most famous dragonrider to ever breathe had confided himself to a corner and could be seen rocking back and forth whispering "one king, seven kingdoms" and "if it's broken, don't crown it king" and most impressive of all, "fucking grandchildren" again and again.
Cregan really felt for the poor man. His legacy had been destroyed. He supposed they had that in common.
He noticed Catelyn Stark, the woman who gave away their only bargaining chip in the dead of night, chastise her husband due to what was unfolding down in the living world.
"I told you, Ned, I told you all those years ago that he could not be trusted. He will try to usurp his cousin's thrones when he has no right to either..he is nothing but a…."
-slap-
-slap,slap,slap,slap-
It was Lyanna Stark, another one of the significant reasons why House Stark and Targaryen fell the way they did. She was not happy.
"NEVER, EVER EVER CALL MY SON THAT WORD AGAIN, OR I'LL SEND YOU DOWN TO THE SEVEN HELLS MYSELF. YOU SPITEFUL, STONEHEARTED BITCH"
Everyone who was there had turned their attention to solely be on the two women. Ignoring what was happening below, not as if it mattered anyway, this was much more entertaining.
Rhaegar Targaryen came running over to try to pry his wife off her own good sister.
"Lyanna stop, she isn't worth the time." He said, trying his best to calm her.
Cregan looked around. All of Rickard Stark's children had some amusing reactions
Ned Stark looked horrified at what was occurring. He had his head fully attached to his body but looked as if he wanted to remove it himself if it meant he could get away from all this.
Brandon Stark looked amused and was almost smirking, and Benjen Stark shook his head, but Cregan noticed a small smirk flicker for a moment.
He remembered how Benjen died for Jon beyond the wall. Cregan felt neither should have been there in the first place. For one, it was a stupid plan, one of which was the imp's doing, and secondly, Cregan felt that Ned should have prohibited Ben from joining the watch in the first place. Their House was weak after the rebellion. Letting him swear his vows just made it even more so.
He noticed Ned finally stand up and end the little tiff between Lyanna and Cat once and for all.
"Cat, we have been through this. Jon is a legitimate Targaryen. He is not a bastard or a Blackfyre, and Lyanna, you have no right to attack my wife like that. Especially, after all I did for your son."
Oh boy, that comment was going to go down well.
Cregan was not a fan of Eddard stark for the most part, but he could not deny that he was one of the bravest men to ever hold the title of Lord Stark,he protected his nephew, even dying with the secret of his birth but did not plan to give him a good life as he could have.
Cregan heard Brynden Rivers whisper to Sheira Seastar. His half-sister and lover, "and here was me thinking that she had an issue with him being Lord Commander."
He heard Joffrey Waters laugh in the background. It appeared more attention had been drawn due to the insistent.
"The irony in that statement Lord Stark." He laughed. "You kept this Targaryen from my father for all those years to keep your promise to your sister, only to go and let him swear his so-called rights away. Not only did you betray your friend, but you betrayed your nephew too."
"Shut up, you spineless bastard, you are no son of mine." –Whack-
It was Robert Baratheon, the man Ned lost his life for. Only to find out he was a shit ruler. He had as much business in this conversation as the Lannister bastard did, Cregan mused. Still, it was nice to see him hit the golden-haired inbred bastard far off into the distance with his war hammer.
"If you ask me, my son Gendry Baratheon is the rightful heir to my throne." Said Robert, forgetting to mention that his son was natural-born, not born in wedlock but out of lust. "All you Stark's are traitors, and this Jon Snow is nothing but a dragonspawn," He continued
"Oh, do shut up Robert, the only reason you got to keep that throne for so long was because of your ties to my family. We are kin rather you like it or not." It was Jaehaerys the Conciliator's turn to speak. The best king of the seven kingdoms they ever had, thought Cregan.
"I took that throne by the laws of conquest Jaehaerys,".snapped Robert
"Aye, and you kept it by the laws of kinship," Jaehaerys replied.
Everything seemed to break down then
Starks, Lannisters, Baratheons, Targaryens. All were arguing about who was the rightful ruler. Very few thought Bran deserved the throne, despite being the only one who had a chair included, and even less thought Sansa closing herself off was going to do her any good.
It was time for Cregan to act. He had just been observing for so long now, noting the foolishness of most of them.
"Enough." He said, quietly
"Enough." He repeated again, slightly louder.
No one seemed to be paying attention
"ENOUGH" He shouted as loudly as he could, louder than Jon when he yelled at Viserion.
Everyone turned to look at him, waiting for him to speak.
"I died over one hundred years ago, and ever since I did, most of my time has been spent watching unfit rulers sit on The Iron Throne. "
"From idiot kings to illegitimate kings to just pure mad kings." He said while looking at Aerys, Aegon the Unworthy, Robert Baratheon, and Joffrey Waters, who was still knocked out, despite already being dead.
"I have watched as The Iron Throne destroyed the Targaryen dynasty, but you weren't the only house producing incompetent family members.
"Robb Stark, I admire your battle tactics, but you were an honorable fool. A fool who was stupid enough to trust the fucking Freys after breaking your vow of marriage. However, you did not become an honorable fool on your own."
He then stood right in front of Ned. "You, Eddard Stark, you and your sister here can easily be argued as being the reason why our house fell so low. If you had just taught your son that there was more to life than your bloody fucking honor, then maybe he wouldn't have died.
He then turned to the woman beside Ned
"You, on the other hand, Lyanna. You got your father and brother killed, and I hope that haunts you every second that you are in the afterlife. Your wolf blood cost us all so much."
Cregan did not give them a chance to respond.
"Well, I have heard and seen enough. I am going to rebuild House Stark, and I am going to do it while getting what was owed to me."
He walked off, leaving everyone speechless. It was time to talk to the higher powers.
Chamber of the Old Gods and the New
Cregan walked into a large open white room, awaiting him were the many gods of Westeros.
They all sat in a chair each. It was as if they knew he was coming. They made a sort of a circle with the chairs they were sitting in, but only half the size that managed to surround Cregan all the same.
"Lord Cregan Stark, what is it that you ask of us today." Boomed one of the voices, the voice that belonged to the god known as the "All-father." One of the gods that the North worshipped for all those centuries. It was only when a person dies that they get to learn his name.
Cregan bent low and starred at the ground as a sign of respect for the gods whose kingdom he resided in.
"Higher powers, I ask of you a favor. I ask you to use your power to send me back. Gift me my life, and I will save House Targaryen and House Stark."
They began to turn to each other with a look of doubt, which didn't suit Cregan's chances of his wish being granted, he mused.
"Lord Cregan, incase you haven't noticed, two Stark children now rule the entire continent. Two children of our House, I would have thought you'd be happy.?" Questioned the legendary House Stark founder, Bran the Builder
"Under normal circumstances, I would be, King Bran. Cregan responded in earnest. "But unlike you, this Bran cannot produce children, and any child Sansa or Arya would not bear our name. The Stark name will be dead in less than a century. As someone from the same House as me, I am sure you do not want that. Do you?" He questioned
"No, Lord Cregan, I do not want our house to die, but I don't see how you could possibly correct this." Bran the Builder responded.
"Why would you want to?" added Freyja, goddess of fertility. Also referred to as "The Mother" by the Andels
"It is simple really, I feel House Stark and House Targaryen deserve much better, both houses have magic in their veins, and I do not want to see it die. I believe if you send me back to just after the battle for the dawn, I can make sure Jon Snow and Daenerys Targaryen claim what is rightfully theirs, together. Combining their claims to the throne and avoiding the deaths of millions."
"You would see a madwoman on the throne?" Snapped Garth Greenhand
"I do not believe Daenerys Targaryen acted out of her own free will. I believe the three-eyed raven had a say in what she did." He answered truthfully
That caused further mumbling and discussion.
They then turned back to him with Freyja speaking on the god's behalf. "We must admit that it has crossed our minds from time to time that perhaps what happened in King's Landing" She paused for a moment. "was not all it seemed."
Cregan thought it was best to continue his advance.
"I ask you to answer me honestly. Do any of you have power over the three-eyed raven?"
The silence was the response to that question.
"How badly do you want your life back, Lord Cregan? Are you willing to kill the three-eyed raven even though you will at the same time kill one of your grandchildren?" Asked Floki, the trickster god with curiosity evident in his voice.
Cregan did not answer for a moment. Was he really willing to go that far? Become a kin slayer to save his House. Was this Brandon Stark truly still alive in the first place? It's not like he had much of choice. To soil his name to save others. Now he knew how Ser Jaime felt...
"Very well. If you send me back to my body during my youth years, I will kill this three-eyed raven. You have my word. All I ask is that you allow me to bring a child of my House with me as well, someone who's life was cut short only a few years ago."
"Who?" Bran the Builder asked.
Rickon Stark.
And so it was set. Cregan made a deal with the Gods. He would return to the land of the living, along with Rickon Stark, son of Ned Stark. They would arrive in the crypts of Winterfell, just after the battle for the dawn. Cregan would then do what he needed to do to make sure Jon Snow and Daenerys Targaryen ended up as the King and Queen of Westeros. It would require a large amount of work, but he was willing to do it.
Before he left, the gods gave him a few warnings. He was first told that he was prohibited from telling anyone about what he knew from the time he came from. Only he would have that knowledge. The timeline would continue as usual unless he stopped it, but it also did not exactly exist anymore. This was a blessing in a way because it meant Cregan could predict his enemy's movements. But he could not explain how he knew.
He was also told that he could not kill the three-eyed raven until the time was right. He was told that "He would feel it" when it was time.
And so it was set, Cregan Stark would return to the world of Westeros, once more. He told everyone and anyone who would listen what he planned to do. Mostly those of House Stark and Targaryen as they were who this concerned.
Most were happy that he would bring their houses back to glory (he even noticed Aegon the conqueror smile for a moment), and some wished to pass on notes to their loved ones.
He accepted them all but read each before placing them into a sack Bran the Builder gave him. Each had to be read as any information from the previous time was not allowed to be passed. He accepted letters from Rhaegar and Lyanna, addressed to their son, a letter from Rhaella for her daughter, and a note from Aemon addressed to "Jon Snow," which only had a few words contained. Others handed over their messages to. Cregan agreed to deliver each to its intended target. Even including a note from Robert Baratheon for Jaime Lannister, mocking him for being "foolish enough to meet the Dothraki on an open field," Cregan declined Robert's attempt to deliver a letter for Daenerys and Jon which simply said "dragonspawn."
A white light was opened up in the form of a door created by the All-Father, ready to bring Cregan back to his body. Cregan he would bring Rickon Stark, his soon to be heir. With Bran being a cripple, Rickon was the best option to make sure the Stark named survived. He had seen fourteen name days. He would make sure he was wed by his sixteenth.
Cregan remembered how the poor boy died because the Bolton bastard hit him with arrows that he could have avoided. Mayhaps he was just too scared and was not thinking hard enough, it did not matter now. Cregan would make sure he would teach Rickon to not make the same mistake as soon as possible.
They said their goodbyes to their loved ones. Including Cregan's three wives, all agreeing that if he dared take another woman, they would cut his balls off when he returned (but by all the gods did he still love them), just as they were about to leave, Ned Stark stopped them.
"Lord Cregan, I know you despise me and blame me for the downfall of our house. I understand that I should have pressed my nephew's claim but just know that I did what I thought was right. Please, I beg you, tell my children I am proud of them, all four of them. Jon is my son, no matter how much you disapprove of me letting him join the Night's Watch. Just know that I am just as unhappy with the decision to send him there again."
Ned then handed him four separate letters. One for each of the Starks.
Cregan hesitated for a moment but took the letters from him all the same.
"I will take your words into account, Lord Stark, and will pass your letters on. I will make sure all of your children get what they deserve. You have my word. One Lord Stark to another." Cregan responded he did not truly hate this man. He just felt Ned let his honor get in front of what he should have done. Cregan would not make the same mistake…not again.
"Thank you, Lord Cregan. I really appreciate that you are giving my youngest a second chance at life too." Ned replied, looking at Rickon and smiling. "It appears his brother and sisters have forgotten about him. I must admit my anger once I realized none of them mentioned him once he was buried in the crypts. It seems they forgot that the pack stays together. " Ned continued in a hushed tone.
"Aye, how could I not? House Stark needs an heir. Rickon here died so his cousin and sister would have a better claim to Winterfell. I will not see that happen again, my lord."
Ned grimaced at the possible insult towards his oldest daughter. Perhaps he knew how Cregan disapproved of Sansa keeping the Knights of the Vale away for so long and not telling Jon they were coming in the first place.
Rickon Stark and Cregan Stark, two sons of House Stark, born over one hundred years apart, Walked through the white door, and just like that, they were gone from the afterlife and were alive once more…
A/N-Well, that's an interesting way to open up a borderline crackfic, eh? So yeah, I'm going "the Three-Eyed Raven having something to do with the Dany madness angle." It is the only way I can justify this as a Jonerys fic as, let's be honest, Cregan could easily just kill her and place Jon on the throne with a Stark as his queen. That is not something I want. It is only fanfiction and is the way I am going to go. It does not mean Cregan is going to ignore Dany's stupid decisions. He is not going to cower when Jon does. He is going to make her a better ruler. Along with Jon, but Jon more so because, well, he knows nothing after all ;).
Why bring back Rickon? He was only killed off so Sansa could be queen, and Jon could be king before her(IMO). D and D are lazy cunts who don't know how to do anything but the bare minimum. ALSO, Cregan's firstborn son and heir was named Rickon, so I have that as a tie in that Rickon died too before Cregan did.
Warnings about this fic- It is NOT an anti-Sansa fic. I get that it seems that way right now. Still, Cregan is going to drop in before she breaks her vow of secrecy and before she screws over her cousin, so if Cregan can't be biased against Dany, he can't be biased against Sansa (at least not too much, I promise he will ease off). Although he has more than enough grounds to hate Dany due to what Aerys did. The best way I can describe this is "anti-Tyrion" and "anti-bran." I do like s1-5 Tyrion, but my god, did he lose his wits for s6-8 ughhh. (giving Bronn Highgarden is definitely going to be reversed. Trust me on that).
I'm more than interested in stopping in on the dead Targaryens and Starks again. (Rumor has it that Rhaegar is still trying to pry his wife off her sister in law). I felt I could have gone into more detail with their different reactions, which is why I would revisit them if asked to. For example, Aerys with his "Kepa's little murderer" t-shirt on while Dany burns down King's Landing, backed by Maegor and Visenya
Oh, and that religion thing. It's not too big of an aspect because I don't want to complicate things. Still, I'm going with the idea that both the Old Gods and the Faith of the Seven are two sides of the same coin. There may be a link to a particular fascinating pagan religion ;D. I have chapter 2 nearly ready to go and will post it soon after this, presuming it doesn't get too much negative backlash. Like as long as I get a few followers of the story, I will post it.
Cregan is here to roast, and his fire is hotter than that of a dragon.