The following songs inspired me to write this story. I strongly suggest you listen to them while reading. :)
O.A.R. - Love Is Worth The Fall
Sleeping At Last - Turning Page
Hanson - Lost Without Each Other
Hanson - Reading Your Mind
DISCLAIMER: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
A big 'THANK YOU' to Fran for helping with the beta work!
This story was supposed to be a long one-shot, but it turned out with more plot than I anticipated. There are 10 chapters in total.
The night was cold, despite it being the middle of March. It might have been my near-drowning incident, or the fact that I'd seen Victoria so close, or even the fact that Charlie had lost his best friend, and I had no idea how to help him.
I huddled under the blanket I'd wrapped around my shoulders many hours ago. The tea Jake had left in my hands before going to check if the Clearwaters needed his help, now cold.
I wrapped my arms around my knees, hugging them to my chest.
Headlights in the driveway made me squint from my spot on the couch. The front door opened sooner than expected—alerting me to the fact that Charlie wouldn't be the one making an entrance.
"Miss me?" Jake called from the hallway, jovially. His face hardened when he spotted me.
"How's Charlie?" I asked, looking away.
"He's spending the night at the Clearwaters' house with Billy."
I nodded. "Why are you here?"
Jake plopped on the couch next to me. "Did you move at all?" His voice reflected the concern I could see in his eyes.
"Not really. I'm cold," I admitted.
He scooted closer, wrapping his arms around me. I was immediately enveloped in his warm body. I closed my eyes, remembering how he'd almost kissed me when he brought me back home earlier.
He sniffed loudly, becoming rigid, yet I could feel him shaking.
"What?" I peeked at his face. I reeled back at the anger I saw there.
"Have you been upstairs yet?" His voice was quiet.
My heart legit stopped for a second; my horror reflected in his eyes as he pressed a finger to my lips.
"Don't move," he said seriously.
It wasn't like I could move, even if I wanted. "Be careful," I managed to choke out.
He rolled his eyes before he disappeared up the stairs, thumping loudly, which seemed counterproductive. He'd scare whoever was there unless they wanted to be found.
Jake returned several minutes later, scowling. "I'm staying the night."
"Do you think she…she'd…"
"It's not her. I know her scent by now."
I gasped, my stomach hurting as the gaping hole in my chest threatened to bleed anew. I decided to stop thinking of the impossible.
They weren't returning. He wasn't returning.
"Hungry?" I offered, slowly standing, clutching the blanket around my shoulders.
"We're ordering pizza."
"No. We have leftovers," I retorted. We'd eaten too much pizza in his garage while working on the bikes. Besides, junk food wasn't my favorite meal.
After a few bites of chicken and some rice, I pushed my plate away. I wasn't even hungry, but I tried humoring Jake. He paused mid-shoving a forkful of rice in his mouth.
"Is that all you're going to eat?" he scolded me.
"Not even Charlie's on my case so bad. Stop it."
"But you need to eat, Bella! Have you looked in the mirror lately?"
I glared at him, curling up on my chair. "I'm not forcing you to keep company to the living dead," I muttered. I was aware that this was the best I could do.
I'd tried living again for Charlie, and Jake had helped, but this was my limit. I couldn't try anymore. And I could tell Jake wanted more of me, but that wasn't going to happen.
He snorted. "You're still very much alive, Bella. You'll get better. You'll forget…it."
"Sure, sure."
I stared out the window into the darkness, listening to him chewing. It was so different, having dinner with Jake, than keeping Charlie company while he ate. There was no small talk, and his presence calmed me. I didn't feel forced to endure the time stranded in the chair.
We returned to the living room when he polished off both our plates. He resumed his position, wrapping his arms around me, and I had to admit he warmed me up faster than the blanket.
I managed to doze off against his shoulder when he suddenly pulled away.
"I got a message from Sam. I have to go."
"Sure," I mumbled, rearranging the blanket around my shoulders.
"I'll be back as soon as I can," he promised.
"Don't worry about me; I'll be here asleep."
"At least, come and lock the door," Jake insisted.
I laughed humorlessly. "Yeah, like a locked door can keep a vampire away."
"Bella!"
"Fine!" I groaned, following him in the hallway. After locking up, I returned to the couch, hugging my knees to my chest.
Being on my own was extremely dangerous. It was so easy to slip back into the numbness, where nothing hurt, and I felt safe.
After a while, I decided to find a sweater, hoping I'd stop shivering. I knew I was in shock over what had happened at the beach, and being alone with my thoughts wasn't helping my state.
As I stood, ready to head to the door, I became aware I wasn't alone in the room. My throat closed up, and my heart exploded into a marathon of beats, which wasn't helping my case.
I kept the blanket tightly around me as if it was going to protect me from a vampire.
I tried convincing myself that it was just my imagination playing tricks. I was in shock. I was tired.
Somewhat convinced I wasn't losing my mind, I spun around. My scream caught in my throat at the sight in front of me.
In the doorway of the living room stood Edward. He didn't look at all like I remembered—his clothes were torn and dirty, his hair looked windswept, and his eyes…even in the darkness, I could tell they were black with thirst.
My first instinct was to blink a few times.
He didn't look like a figment of my imagination.
But he appeared to be very real, standing as still as a statue, with his head inclined toward the floor, avoiding my stare.
The more I realized that he was actually here, that he was back–a new feeling surfaced.
Anger.
I picked my cup of cold tea from earlier and hurled it at him. The cup shattered in a hundred pieces upon contact with his shoulder. At least, my aim hadn't betrayed me by much, though I'd hoped to hit his head.
His head jerked up sharply, his eyes wide. I forgot how to breathe, which brought me back to reality.
I tore my eyes from his, knowing I wouldn't be able to think rationally while he looked at me like a kicked puppy.
I looked around for something that could hurt him. I wanted to be able to do that more than anything. And then I wanted to hug him and taste his lips again.
I spotted the candlestick holder on the mantle of the fireplace. I picked it up, and when I turned to make my attack, I gasped in surprise. Edward was right in front of me.
His guarded eyes stayed on my face as he slowly curled his fingers around my wrist. I dropped the candlestick holder with a loud clatter.
"You're alive," he breathed. His thumb caressed the pulse point on my wrist.
"Last time I checked, yeah," I said sarcastically.
He then wrapped his arms around me, and I froze.
It was going to kill me when he left because it was now apparent that this was just a social visit. Alice had seen me cliff diving. But why had that worried Edward? Why that, and why not the motorcycles or the fact he'd nearly killed me by abandoning me in the forest?
"Stop, stop, stop!" I struggled against his iron grip, and he let go of me immediately. "What are you doing here?"
His face turned into a grimace. "I thought I could endure living without you, but the truth is, I'm a selfish creature, and I've been fighting against returning to you for a while."
I shook my head, not understanding his explanation, or trying to believe that he was really back.
"Alice called me earlier. She'd seen my decision to return, and asked how close to Forks I was. Alice rarely sounds so panicked, which made my dead heart crack into a thousand pieces." Edward's voice was feather-soft in my hair. "She saw you throwing yourself off a cliff, then nothing."
"Nothing?" I repeated in a high voice.
If it weren't for Jake, would Victoria have finished me right there? I shivered violently at the thought.
"What were you thinking, Bella?" Edward groaned, caressing my cheek.
"I was cliff diving," I explained. "It was supposed to be fun, but the weather wasn't ideal. Jake saved me from the ocean."
Edward shook his head. "I'm so very sorry," he whispered. "I handled the situation in the worst way possible."
A sob escaped my lips as the hole in my chest threatened to open and swallow me into its abyss.
"Why are you back?" I managed to ask.
"As I said, I was returning. Leaving you has been the biggest mistake of my life."
My knees buckled. I couldn't entertain the thought that he was staying—that kind of hope was going to be my undoing when he left again.
"But you left. You said you didn't want me." I tried rationalizing what he was saying.
"And you believed my lies." It was a statement, so I chose to let him keep talking. "After all the times I told you how much I love you."
My heart leaped at the words I'd missed hearing from him. "It made sense. Why would you even consider wasting your time with someone like me?"
A rueful smile ghosted over his lips. "Silly Bella," he murmured, caressing my cheek. "You are my life. I cannot live without my heart."
"Do you know you very nearly killed me when you left," I choked out.
His sorrowful eyes stared at me for a long time. "I'll spend the rest of eternity apologizing if I could have you back in my arms one more time."
Since I was actually in his arms, I wrapped mine around his neck. My fingers grabbed fistfuls of his hair. Looking him in the eyes, I lifted on my tiptoes. "Kiss me," I urged him.
When our lips met, I believed, probably for the first time since I'd spotted him in the doorway, that Edward was truly back.
I felt warm being in his cold embrace; the hole in my chest healing as our lips met.
Suddenly, the front door was kicked in, slamming against the wall with a loud banging noise.
I grabbed at Edward's ripped shirt, screaming in fright. He turned, crouching protectively in front of me.
My legs felt weak. I wasn't ready for a confrontation with Victoria.
But when light flooded the hallway, I saw it wasn't Victoria who'd barged into my house. Jake was shaking like he was about to phase, glaring daggers at Edward.
It took me a moment to remember Edward could read Jake's mind because when Edward snarled, I stumbled back into the wall. His hand caught mine before I could fall. But when Jake growled loudly, taking a step closer, my knees buckled.
The last thing I remembered was my hand slipping from Edward's as I crumbled to the floor.
.
.
.
When I opened my eyes, I was in my bed.
Edward was crouched at the side of my bed, watching me like a hawk. Then, I remembered what had happened.
I sat up, looking around, expecting to find Jake brooding in the corner of the room.
"I'm afraid your friend has left."
I swallowed hard. "What happened?"
"You fainted," he said softly. "Please, drink some water." He handed me a glass from the nightstand.
I propped my back against the headboard, sipping slowly. "Did he hurt you?"
The corner of Edward's lips turned up. "Trust you to worry about me when a werewolf nearly lost control over his shifting under your roof."
"He'd have had a lot to explain to Charlie," I chuckled.
Edward did smile this time. "I got the gist of what I missed from the thousand thoughts he threw at me. Now, I understand why your scent threw me off when I arrived."
"I smell different?" I asked curiously.
"It's still the same alluring drug, but wrapped up in putrid wet dog smell," Edward scowled.
"Oh!" I wasn't even going to pretend to understand what that meant.
Then his dark eyes frosted. "So, when the vampires leave town, you find some other mythical creature's company?"
I winced, busing myself with drinking from the glass.
"Werewolves, Bella?" he groaned, shaking his head.
I swallowed hard. "Did Jake get to tell you that not all the vampires left?" My voice was shaky, aware he'd go berserk when he found out about Victoria.
"What," he spat. "My whole family left."
I leaned over to my nightstand to place the empty glass there. "Victoria came back for revenge," I whispered, not meeting his eyes.
"Victoria?" he roared, springing up so fast, he was a blur.
Edward started pacing too fast for me to be able to follow his movements. His hands went into his hair, and an agonizing sound escaped his throat.
"Hasn't Alice been clear that my place is with you?" I broke the silence. "I'm not safe as a human! I'll never be!"
Edward returned to my side, taking my hands carefully. He kissed the back of them. "Tell me everything."
It was difficult to form coherent thoughts with his intense gaze upon me, his proximity, the general relief I felt knowing he was actually here. He was back in my life, and I'd do anything to keep him here until I found a way to convince him to turn me and become his in every sense of the word.
I squeezed his fingers, not sure if he felt it, but it grounded me. I started my story with the supposed bear in the woods, then my trip to the meadow where I'd run into Laurent and how the wolves saved me. I told him how Jake told me about another vampire they'd been chasing – a redheaded woman.
"For the love of all things holy! You're not a danger magnet. It's worse, far worse. It's like Forks has turned into the most dangerous black hole, attracting every evil in the world, and you're at the center of it."
I winced at his analogy with the black hole.
"I saw her," I admitted quietly. "In the water. But then Jake pulled me out."
Edward froze, not moving for minutes on end. His horrified eyes were on mine, then he gathered me in his arms.
"Oh, Bella! I'm so sorry, my love."
A sob exploded from my lips as I pressed my cheek against his shoulder, basking in the feeling of knowing he was here in my room, in my arms.
"I've tried tracking Victoria," he said softly. "I thought something like this was going to happen, but I'm terrible at tracking. She led me as far south as Mexico before I lost her. Little did I know she'd returned here."
I gasped, pulling away enough to look into his eyes. "You mean, she knew all along you were gone?"
"It's a possibility."
How could I think of fooling a vampire?
"Shhh." Edward caressed my hair. "I'm here now. She's not going to come back anytime soon. The dogs scared her off."
"But she will," I retorted, ignoring his insults thrown at my friends. "And when she does, I want to be able to fight her.
Edward smiled ruefully. "With the candlestick holder?" he teased.
I blushed horribly, pressing my forehead against his shoulder. "I was so angry. I wanted to hurt you so badly."
"Remind me to never cross you again."
"Never leave me," I pleaded, desperately.
"Never," he promised. "Aren't you tired?"
"A little," I agreed. Weariness was slowly taking over my body now that I was relaxed and warm.
"Sleep." He stood, and I lunged to grab his hand. "Don't go!"
"I'm going to call Carlisle. I need everyone back if we have to face Victoria."
"Stay," I insisted, scooting over in the bed.
Edward smiled indulgently, nestling against the headboard. I draped myself over his stone-hard body in a silly attempt to keep him trapped there. He tugged the blanket over my back and shoulders, stroking my hair.
I fell asleep, basked in his glorious scent. A part of me never wanted to wake up, afraid this was just a terrible dream my brain had concocted as an aftermath of nearly dying from hypothermia.
When I came around, the first thing I registered in my mind was that I was alone in bed.
It had been a dream.
See you all next Monday!
Anxiously waiting for your thoughts on this story.