Chapter 1: The Bathroom
"May I suggest some concealer around the eyes, dear?" Came from the cracked mirror in front of her. The girl scoffed. Like concealer would do anything.
She would need a lot more than just that.
The bathroom she was mewling in was infamous. Moaning Myrtle was its only resident, and thanks to her penchant for deluging the bathroom and surrounding hallways in toilet water during her tantrums, this lavatory was mostly unused.
Which made it perfect for a whole host of illicit uses. On weekends, she'd bribe Myrtle with her company and brew potions that she perhaps shouldn't in here, just Myrtle Warren and Se – NO. She shouldn't waste thoughts on him.
Today, however, there was no potion being brewed, unless one counted the mixture of fresh water and saline tears flowing down the drain in front of her.
She should clean up and face the world.
What she should do, and what she will do, are two totally different things. She sat down on the floor, barely noticing thin puddle of water that hadn't yet drained after Myrtle's most recent tantrum.
"Why'd he have to be such a two-faced git!" she wailed. Her head leaned back, and gently bumped into the stall door behind her.
After wallowing in her misery for about another half-hour or so, bemoaning the loss of a friendship that seemed as solid as the oak doors to the great hall, and yet had burned as fast as loose bundle of grass, the fire having consumed all of the material before the ashes had a chance to hit the ground, Lily stood up, gazing at her wretched reflection in the broken mirror in front of her. Evidently the curse she had let off in her initial fit of anger had done more damage than she initially thought.
The mirror didn't seem to mind being used as target practice. It kept blabbering on about the various ways she could remedy her appearance, as if the superficial skin of who she, Lily Evans, was, mattered.
Lily fired another curse at the mirror.
The tap squealed softly as she turned it. No water came out.
Bizarre. She thought to herself. I didn't know magical plumbing could break.
She leaned in for closer inspection, inspecting the tap. On the side of it, there was a small engraving of a serpent. "Some Slytherin must have defaced it in the process of wrecking it. Left a calling card." She pondered to herself.
No, but that was bizarre. Next to the snake there was a single word – OPEN – but in a font that was like nothing she had ever seen. It appeared to be a solid squiggle, almost like some sort of weird line, but most definitely processing in her mind as meaning open.
"Now that is really weird." She muttered under her breath. "What am I supposed to do, say §Open§ - "
The sink made no noise as it retreated into the walls. "That was… And what did I say? Open?"
"Am I…?"
An odd, but familiar feeling niggled at the back of her mind. That same feeling she got whenever she was on the precipice of solving a problem that her subconscious had beaten her to, the answer close, rushing quickly towards her with the speed and power of an oncoming train, but not quite there yet.
"But that can't be. It simply can't."
She pondered the situation more.
"Is it even possible?"
The evidence wasn't solid, but the conclusions drawn from it were… terrifying, should it be true.
"Only one way to find out." She brought to the forefront of her mind the grass snake she had seen in the garden that one time, gazing out the window at the slender green serpent sheltering from the rain. "Serpensortia!"
A grass snake poured out of her wand and landed on the ground in front of her. It twisted around, looking for the purpose of its summoning
"§Hello, can you hear me§?" Lily asked of it.
"§A Summoner that speaks the sacred tongue? What do you ask of me, twolegs§?" The snake hissed at her.
"§This wasn't how I was expecting to spend my day§." she muttered to herself, before idly flicking her wand and dispelling the snake. Any thoughts of what a particular Slytherin and ex-friend and bastard had said to her not an hour ago were gone. "That's incredibly unusual." She contemplated. "I guess – I wonder. I'm not sure how I got this"
"By the looks of it, that would probably be the fabled Chamber of Secrets. Or, the entrance, at least." She thought back to that time in second year when they stayed up late discussing the legendary room. Legendary, in that it only existed in fables, tall tales told to trepidatious teens. "Or not." She snorted.
Lily transfigured several rolls of toilet paper into a rope. She tied one end to herself and knotted the other to the legs of one of the stalls, before affixing it to the floor with a sticking charm for good measure. Shooting cleaning charms in front of her, she cast the elongation charm on the rope, and descended the pipe into the Chamber.
It was slow going. It took several minutes before the pipe leveled out, and she illuminated her wand to take in the sight in front of her, as the ambient light from the bathroom had waned.
She was greeted with the spectacular sight of…
A cave?
With a flick of her wand, a ball of light soars out ahead, illuminating dozens of rat skeletons in varying states of being crushed into dust.
She continued ahead, finally coming to a wall with metal snakes coiled across it.
"§Open§" The snakes retreat, and the wall vanished silently, leaving an inky black hollow. Lily stepped through, into the suffocating darkness of the next room, her wand doing little to light the way.
A pair of witchlights flared on.
Followed by another.
And another.
Lights flickered on in a cascade traveling down the chamber, illuminating it in its entirety, revealing sculptures of serpents on the walls, looming above pools of still, deep looking water. Between each serpent bust there was a column supporting the ceiling, adorned with serpentine carvings twisting around them. The hall extended for about one hundred meters, and the ceiling stood more than ten meters above the floor. At the far end of the chamber, a larger, semicircular area with a higher ceiling played host to a massive bust of a head, presumably Slytherin's. The uniform, deep grooves on either side of the mouth hinted at some sort of entryway.
Water started pouring out of the mouths of the serpents, splashing into the pool's water, but not disturbing the majority of the surface. Two by two, the serpent's mouths began pouring out water.
And I thought today's Slytherin's were melodramatic. Lily pondered to herself, amused at the parallels. She continued forward warily, casting revealing spells at everything she could see. There were some obvious enchantments on the chamber, but even with her rather prodigious skill, she was still a fifth year, so anything beyond their general purpose eluded her.
"Incredible. I wonder who the last person to find it was?" Lily cast about the chamber. Not finding anything more, she turned her attention to the large bust that was presumably Salazar Slytherin.
"How am I going to go about opening you?" She wondered aloud. Unfortunately, the Chamber of Secrets didn't come with a user's guide, or instruction manual. "I would guess, based on a sample size of two, that I say something in Parseltongue to crack you open." She told the bust.
The bust didn't speak back to her. Statues were like that, most of the times.
"§OPEN§!" Lily called out to the stone statue. It remained shut. Evidently, there is a different password to enter the inner sanctum. She thought.
"If I were a wizard with an ego the size of the castle with a penchant for melodrama, what would my password be?" She thought aloud. There was something about Slytherin locking some room of the school with a self-aggrandizing password as a final act of spite when he departed the castle.
"Oh, right. There's only one answer to that question."
Here goes nothing… "§Speak to me Salazar Slytherin, Greatest of the Hogwarts Four§" There was no sound as the mouth lowered to the ground. "Pretentious prat." She remarked.
"Oh, I'm very flattered, thank you!" A voice called out. Lily spun on her heel, looking for the disturbance.
"§I bet she's just like the last one§" A deep, feminine voice made some sort of a rasping chuckle.
"§I fear you are right, dear Tessie. Now! Don't be shy! Come in! Come in§!" The first voice called out, this time in Parseltongue.
Lily walked forward, hesitantly, and looked around. Immediately in front of her was an opening to an alcove in which a giant green snake was coiled tightly. It had emerald green scales that glistened and shimmered in the witchlights. To her right, a small staircase led up to a raised platform, about five feet about the ground floor, looking out over the coiled serpent.
The snake moved, twisting around, moving its great, crowned head towards Lily
"§THAT'S A BASILISK§!" Lily shouted. As she was closing her eyes, they contacted the seemingly infinite in-depth yellow eyes of the beast. She was transfixed, held still by an unseen force.
Have I been petrified? Lily thought. No, that would be impossible. I wouldn't have been able to think if that happened if that had happened. Hesitantly, she attempted to move her hand. To her great surprise, it was still working.
"§Truly, your grasp of the obvious is inspiring§." The man's voice drawled sarcastically. "§Going to make any remarks on the green scales, yellow eyes, or are you just going to gasp in shock at your continued corporeal existence§?"
"§It's a basilisk. How the hell am I staring at a basilisk and not dead? §" Lily pondered frantically in Parseltongue.
"§Well, based on the fact that you entered the Chamber in the first place, I'd wager it's because you are one of my descendants§." The voice mused. "§Now, if it wouldn't be too much trouble, do you by chance happen to know the Memory Charm§?"
"§The Memory Charm§?" Lily asked, confused by the non sequitur. She came out of the trance she was in and went up the stairs. There was a library off to the back that seemed to have ancient texts on it, and Lily salivated for a moment at the thought of all of that knowledge stored there. There was a desk with some scattered materials on it midway back. Next to a window that staired out into the chamber, presumably through the eye of the bust, sat a portrait of a bald man with an elegant goatee and a snake around his shoulders. Lily leaned in and read the label. 'Salazar Slytherin', as she was expecting at this point. "§What do you need a Memory Charm for§?"
"§I don't need one, silly girl. It's for my basilisk§." The portrait – no – Salazar snapped at her. "§If it isn't too much trouble, I'm going to need the year, as well§."
"§Why does your basilisk need a Memory Charm§?" Lily stared at the portrait.
"§Because the last person to use Tessie used her for evil, and her memories of that event have tortured her to this day. Now quick! Obliviate her back to 1940 and I'll regale you with the story. I'd rather not prolong her suffering any further§!"
Lily went back down the stairs, hesitantly, and looked at 'Tessie'. The 25-meter-long serpent seemed to pout and roll its head to the side in a silent plea for mercy. Lily carefully breathed a few times. The memory charm was one Severus had taught her when they were learning the mind arts. She fought back the tears that came with any memories of that bastard. She placed her wand a few centimeters from the snake's eye, to avoid any chance of it reflecting off the magic resistant scales, and incanted. "Obliviate." Snippets of the snake's memory flashed before her eyes, before she decided enough was enough.
The snake blinked twice, thin nictating membranes articulating up and down across the yellow eyes. The effusive magic of her glare noticeably dimmed when they were closed.
"§Where am I? What happened§?" The snake hissed in disoriented confusion. Its head snapped around as she took in her environment.
"§You are whole now, Tessie. The previous Heir used you for evil, and the new Heiress has erased your memories of the incident, as to not allow your past and his misdeeds to torture you§." Salazar explained.
"§Thank you, Heiress§." Tessie nuzzled lily with her scaly snout. Lily jumped back.
"§Now, my Heiress! Come forward and speak with me§!" The portrait called out hungrily. Lily approached, tentatively, and came face to face once again with the man.
"You're Salazar Slytherin." Lily stated, in English. She crossed her arms and unleashed the full 'Evans Glare' at Salazar.
"I'm afraid not. I'm just a painted reflection of him." The portrayed replied. "Say, you seem awfully antagonistic. Have I done something to offend you?"
"You put a Class 5-X monster in a school full of children, for starters." Lily glared at him.
"Technically, my chamber is beneath the school, but a fair enough point, and one that I get asked often enough, I suppose." Salazar mused. "Tessie is incapable of killing any of the students with her glare. A Fate Ward is woven into the school which precludes such events. Should someone attempt to kill with Tessie, a series of contrivances will occur that do nothing more than petrify them. A ghost may flood a nearby toilet, they may be looking into the polished suit of armor. The possibilities are really endless. The only death occurred because the one affected was shoved over by the murderer, and she hit her head and died of an untreated concussion."
"Really? That doesn't justify putting one into a school." Lily's green eyes made focused contact with the similarly green eyes of Salazar.
"I suppose not." Salazar stared at her. "But defending the school against attack does. You people these days have Muggle-Repelling Wards, The Statute, and the Ministry of Magic liaising with the Muggle Government. In my day, oh, in my day, we didn't have any of that. During my 98-year tenure as an educator here, we fended off no fewer than 18 separate assaults by the muggle army of the time, and four magical assaults by three dark lords. In each of those instances, Tessie was invaluable with the defense of the castle. Now, enough about my snake. If my explanation didn't justify myself to you, nothing will. Tell me about yourself, my Heiress."
Lily considered the portrait for a moment. "I'm Lily Evans."
"The great Lily Evans has decided to grace me with her presence? Tis such an honor." Salazar's voice was smooth and sardonic. The portrait rolled its eyes. "Tell me about yourself. House, Year, Standing, Wand. That sort of drivel that speaks so much to a wizard's character."
"I'm a Gryff-" Lily started
"You're a Gryffindor? Druids help me! Helga and Godric are laughing at me from the heavens! You certainly seem saner than the last few to come through here, so I suppose I shall let it slide. Continue." Salazar snorted.
"Anyway." Lily hissed. "I'm almost done with fifth year, I'm top of the class with everything but potions, where I'm second, and I have a Willow and Unicorn Hair wand."
Salazar sighed. "At least you are top of the year. The other two, I can forgive, seeing as you are noticeably less genocidal than the last of my Heirs to come through here. Tell me, I've never heard of the Evans family. Are you, by chance, a member of the New Zealand branch of my family? The last Heir to come through here that wasn't one of those degenerate Gaunts, unworthy of even a drop of my blood, was rumored to have moved to New Zealand with the rest of his clan."
"I don't think so. I mean, I don't think I have any relatives from New Zealand." Lily responded.
Salazar squinted at her. "Most unusual. Did any of the Gaunts, perchance, marry into House Evans? Was there an as of yet unknown cadet line?"
"Not that I know of." Lily responded. "And there's no 'House Evans', and I'm not part of any cadet lines, that I know of."
Salazar gasped softly. "Oh, the ignominy. The last Heiress of my noble line, a mudblood."
"Hey!" Lily snapped. She brandished her wand. "Who are you calling a mudblood?"
"You, of course. Keep up!" Salazar retorted. "As I was saying, it is an ignominious fate that the last of my line in Britain is one with such an ignoble birth as your own. I'd call Tessie to drive you away, but she takes commands from the Living Heir above all others."
Lily snorted. "I half expected you to sic your overgrown worm on me by now."
"Sic my – why would I do that? Disregarding the fact that it's impossible, as I have made clear, why would I sic Tessie upon you?" Slytherin looked genuinely confused. "Get her to drive you out of the Chamber of Secrets, certainly, but kill you? And please, refrain from calling my majestic empress of serpents an overgrown worm."
"Maybe because you hated mudbloods like me enough to get into a fight with Gryffindor about it, during which you were driven from the school." Lily retorted.
"Hate mudbloods? Stars above! Wherever did you get such an idea? A duel with Gryffindor? I did die as a result of a duel with Godric, certainly, but it was an amicable exhibition duel between friends."
"That's what the history books say." Lily answered plaintively.
"Evans, the history books are wrong. I doubt the books somehow missed the twenty-two separate battles this school went through in its first hundred years and managed to get the details of my death correct." Slytherin seethed. "Certainly, I have an intense dislike for mudbloods, and view them beneath me and wizarding culture, but I never wished them death. Heavens, Rowena killed more than I did, but that was mostly luck on her part."
He paused, to collect his thoughts. "Of the eighteen battles with muggle forces, five had forces led into the castle by muggleborn betrayers. Muggleborns also did consistently poorer than born wizards. Did I like them? No. Did I trust them? Certainly not. Did I still teach them? Yes. Did I do my duty to the school and protect them? Of course. They were children. I've crossed a great many lines in my time, but killing children was never one of them. Now, if there is nothing more, begone. There is a broad difference between teaching the magic begrudgingly to a mudblood and one besmirching my chamber."
"Hmmm. I don't think so. That's a rather impressive library. I'm not going to give something like that up, and the chamber looks useful to practice magic in." Lily remarked. She got a mean glint in her eye. "And besides, as you have said yourself, I am your Heiress, so technically it is my chamber now.
"Filthy Mudbloods. Shame of my flesh! Coming in like you own the place. It's disgraceful. So help me, if I could, I would remove you from the chamber post haste!."
"Well, thanks, Mister Slytherin." Lily drawled. "You make me feel so welcome."
"Please Lily." Salazar remarked in a faux genial manner that did little to hide his antagonism. "It's Lord Salazar Slytherin, of fen, the Great and Powerful to you."
Lily snorted and set to the bookshelves. Some of the texts were questionable, to say the least, and almost all were very old. There were tomes on transfiguration, diatribes on the Dark Arts, essays on esoteric magic, and books on blood magic.
"This library is, well –"
"Incredible?" Lord Salazar Slytherin, of fen, the Great and Powerful queried. "Such a shame it is being used by someone unworthy of the knowledge within. If only an Heir with a proper birth would show up and bar you." He sighed wistfully.
"I was going to say illegal as all hell, and that second bit was certainly uncalled for, but that definitely works too." Lily intimated. She picked up a book on the Mind Arts and began to read.
A/N: This one has been in the works for a while. I've written about 22 chapter for it thus far. November was a hell of a time, let me tell you. I've been stalling on publishing between bouts of self criticism and doubt. I'll be updating it every Friday until it is done, I run out of chapters, finish, or die. I hope you all like this take on Lily Evans.
I started writing this because I was tired of seeing the trope where Harry is a Parselmouth because one of his mother's ancestors was a squib descended from Slytherin, and thus she has a secret inheritance, and we never see any mentions about Lily talking to snakes.
Also, Badass!Lily is one of the best things to find in a fic, fight me.
Also, I am looking for Betas. PM me or message me on Discord.