Edit: Was previously a one-shot but is now a multiple chapter story. the first few chapters are bumpy ride. buckle up and pay attention the road!
don't leave me here
The leaves had started to change color and fall from grace. The air was crisp and cool, warning of the upcoming desolation of winter. Just like his life. Nothing but utter desolation.
He'd dismissed his security for the remainder of the evening as he drove to his family house in Westchester. It was time to deal with the fallout that was waiting for his arrival. His family.
His family, his safety net... or so he thought. They'd found out about his secret life. It all came to light; the submissives, the inappropriate relationship with an older and married woman who happened to be a friend of the family and most of all, the realization that their son and brother was someone that they never knew at all. It was a harsh light that had been cast on him now and it was a painful exorcism that would not end.
In a way, it was their own guilt that was choking them for they too had failed. That truth coupled with the bombardment of what they found out was just too much to handle. It was too much to make sense of. Where would they even begin?
It all came crashing down when his mother decided to surprise him. He had dismissed the staff for the weekend and lied to the family that he was busy. It was a holiday weekend and he had been working very hard on a deal that would've increased his net worth significantly, except at the last minute it all fell apart. Just like that, 6 months of hard work went down the drain with no way to recover it.
Christian was livid.
He needed a release. He was desperate.
That's where his new submissive Leila would come in.
He told his family he wouldn't be available due to work. That was unacceptable to his mother. She had barely seen her son in these six months so she decided to head to his apartment to surprise him and coax him out of his ivory tower.
The elevator pinged and much to Grace's surprise, she wasn't greeted by Taylor or another CPO. The apartment was eerily quiet. She figured he'd be holed away in his study so she head towards the corridor that led from the great room into that direction. That too was empty. All his cars were in the garage so she knew he was home. She walked back out and heard a sound of someone walking from the upstairs level. It was the sound of heels.
Once Grace reached the top of the staircase, she walked down the rows of rooms but not before passing one that looked like someone lived in it. She saw a weekender bag, some trinkets of jewelry and a perfume with some makeup.
He had a woman over?
He wasn't gay?
Curiosity got the best of her and walked to the end of the corridor to a door that was slightly open.
What she saw on the other side of the door when she pushed to open it further was not something she could ever have imagined.
It was her best friend. Her son, shirtless and a petite woman standing completely naked and blindfolded in front of them. The room they were in looked like a medieval torture chamber.
Grace gasped. Elena and Christian who had their backs to the door turned around and she could see the blood drain from their faces.
Grace left, rushing out of the apartment not giving them a chance explain. She couldn't stomach the sight of what she just saw. She knew what it was. She'd heard and read about it here and there.
That happened two weeks ago. In the days that followed since that horrifying walk in, Carrick and Elliot tried calling Christian but he had completely shut down. He was mortified. Elena had been cut off from the Grey's. Leila had been dismissed. It was her introductory session that afternoon, if she had done well then she would've stayed the entire weekend to be at Christian's beck and call.
Things obviously didn't go as planned.
Much like how this night was about to go.
From the moment Christian walked in, there was a chill in the air. The eerie quiet of everyone sitting in the formal living area at a distance from each other was too much to handle. It went from pin drop silence to a screaming match. There was no in between. There were tears. Musings of disappointment. The blame game was in full play. It was confusing. Everyone in the room felt like a failure. They had failed themselves and each other.
Christian drove out of there like a bat out of hell. He was not in control. He couldn't go to Elena. He was repulsed her. She would only make him feel shittier. He was too ashamed to call Flynn. Years of Flynn giving Christian the tools to help him improve his personal life made no difference because Christian didn't want to use them. He refused to progress personally.
You can't help someone that doesn't want to be helped.
Ana lay awake in bed. Tossing and turning. Her mind was racing thinking of the bills that were mounting and debt that was sneering at her. She was working three jobs and was barely making ends meet. Her roommate was struggling too. New York City was not an easy to make a name for yourself in but once you did, there was no turning back.
She threw her covers off in frustration and got dressed. It was 1:08am, if she couldn't sleep then she was going to make herself useful and bake a cake. She lived above the Café she worked at in alphabet city. It was a family owned establishment and they loved Ana and her roommate who worked there part-time. It was a small 4 story walkup and the owners of the Café gave the girls a break on the rent which helped. Ana also was allowed to use the coffee shops kitchen to bake goodies if she liked the only catch was she had to bake two of each so it could be sold at the Café. It was a deal that was too good to pass up.
Ana head down to the Café and got to work. It calmed her. The scent of vanilla extract reminded her of her mom. She smiled at the memory.
After placing the pans of blueberry coffee cake on the cooling racks, she checked the time and saw it was only 2:43am. Now what?
Walking through kitchen to open the back door, to let in the cool fall air. The bar across from the Café's backyard was was owned by Phil. He was an old Irish grandpa who lived in the same town as the owner of the Café, Matthew grew up. Since the Café and Bar had opposite operating times with very little overlap, the combined their backyards and setup the seating area with market lights. In the daytime, the Café would use it till 4pm for it's customers and the bar would take over after 5pm.
Remembering that there was trash to be taken out, Ana locked up the door to the backyard and went about gathering the trash. She head out into the alleyway to throw it all in the dumpster when she heard the faint sounds of someone grunting and whimpering. She looked around and saw two pairs of legs, from the looks of it seemed like someone was lying on the ground. She walked over and found an injured man lying on the ground, trying his best to get up.
"Hey, hey... easy there." She cooed softly before kneeling down to try and help him stand. His mouth was bleeding and he'd been punched in the face but there wasn't too much damage; just some minor cuts and a busted lip. Still, he looked so beautiful. His eyes were barely open and his head was swaying like his body. He was hammered.
"I can't stannn..." he slurred.
"It's okay, I'll help you. Do you know where you are?" She asked him gently.
"In your arms." He grinned and laughed like a child. Ana tried to concentrate at the task at hand and get him to cooperate which was a feat in itself. He towered her almost. This is why she hated being short and a lightweight.
She stumbled into the Café and sat him down on one of the couches. She went to get the first aid kit and helped him up the first flight of stairs into her apartment. In addition to getting cleaned up, he needed coffee and something to eat. She'd learned from taking care of her roommate over the years.
She sat him down on her bed and got to working on cleaning him up.
"I'm really sorry but this will sting." She smiled apologetically. Christian shrugged sullenly with his eyes closed. He could take it. This would be the least painful thing he'd be experiencing this evening.
Except, it really did sting. He winced and cursed under his breath. Ana continued to apologize and soothe him, blowing gently on his cuts. She smelled like vanilla and blueberries. She smelled like cake. He loved cake.
"I'm Ana by the way. What's your name?" She asked while putting away the things back in the first aid kid.
"Chris...ti-" He slurred.
"Hi Chris. Do you have a phone or someone I can call for you?"
He shook his head violently. "Nope" he said popping the p for added effect. "No one loves me."
How could no one love a beautiful man like him?
"I find that hard to believe, Chris. Maybe you just had a bad day." She held his hand and brushed her thumb softly over his knuckles.
Christian opened his eyes properly for the first time since he had been helped and looked at a petite brunette with piercing blue eyes looking back at him with a smile. Angel. He thought. She's an angel.
When Ana finally looked into his, she saw the loneliest and darkest storm.
They reminded her of a song she loved.
I could tell by his face
Those two tired eyes
It's been a long night searching for grace
Now the sun won't rise
She silently wondered what haunted him.
"You're pretty and beauuuutiful." He smiled wide and leaned forward to, in his mind, give her a certified Christian Grey kiss but to Ana it looked like he was going to fall down so she grabbed his shoulders to steady him.
"I guess you really are drunk there, Chris." She giggled. Beautiful wasn't a word that Ana had ever heard from the opposite sex before. She had her own demons that haunted her and kept her hidden away.
Ana told him to stay put while she would make him a cup of coffee and got him something to eat. When she returned he was still sitting on the couch, staring into space. She kneeled back in front of him and helped him drink the coffee but it hurt his lip so she got him one of those metal reusable straws she had along with feeding him a muffins she had baked earlier in the morning.
He was like a child in a trance. Ana tried to get him to talk. He started to feel a little better and began talking a little clearer. He'd had lost his phone and was not entirely sure how he ended in the alley. He probably got into a fight, a by product of the pent up aggression from his family meeting earlier in the evening. All he said was that his family had abandoned him like his birth mother. They couldn't handle his truth.
He was unwanted.
"Don't give up hope, Chris. Give each other some time." She said gently and asked him again if he remembered anyone's phone number so she could call them but he shook his head again.
"I just wanna sleep." He pouted like child. It warmed Ana's heart. She helped him take off his jacket and tucked him in her bed but he called out to her, asking her to sleep next to him. She wasn't sure about that but offered to sit next to him till he did. He held her hand pulling it close to him and she ran her hand through his hair to soothe him. He looked and seemed so sad as he kept his eyes fixed on her. He was fighting sleep and her heart ached.
Christian stirred kicking his legs a bit and opened his eyes. His head felt heavy along with his limbs. He licked his lips and it stung. What the hell happened? He looked to his right and saw a woman sleeping with her back to him.
Oh fuck. Did he have a one-night stand with a random woman? Did she touch him? Panic set in. He had to get out and that's what he did. He didn't even know where he was but he slowly got up and gathered his clothes and got the fuck out of there. He exited the building and realized he was in Alphabet city. His car was parked in the next block. He was in no state to drive but he could at least send Taylor a message from the car's tracker system. In the event he lost his phone, they had this system installed all Grey House vehicles.
Two weeks later.
It's been two weeks since that morning. When Taylor picked him up he tried to remain as neutral as he could but ended up telling Christian he looked like he had been run over by a truck. After a shower and some more sleep back at his apartment, he was able to piece the night back together and felt an immediate sense of regret. He was an asshole. He shouldn't have left Ana like that.
Ana. Beautiful. Ana.
Innocent blue eyes.
Ana.
He thought about her giggle, her smile and her gentle hands soothing him. How she continued to ask him if he needed anything. How she fed him and made sure he took painkillers so that the next morning wouldn't be so difficult.
I tend to do this for my roommate every now and then so I promise you won't feel too horrible in the morning.
He had to go back to her but he wanted his face to heal and now two weeks later he looked like his old self. The busted lip had healed and the cuts on his cheeks were fading.
He remembered her telling him that she worked at the Café downstairs. It was a Thursday afternoon and he told Andrea to cancel all his appointments for the remainder of the day. He was a man on a mission.
Taylor dropped him off at in front of the Café and waited in the car.
Christian Grey didn't do nervous but for some reason he was. He stood in front of the Café door for a few seconds before pulling it open triggering the jingle of bells that alerted the arrival of a new customer.
The place was full of people, mostly working on their laptops and drinking various beverages and baked goods. Christian walked up to the counter and was met with the sight of a older woman in her 60's.
"Hi, Welcome to Café on C. What can I get started for you?" She smiled back with warmth.
"I'm actually looking for someone. Her name is Ana."
The woman's face fell.
"I'm sorry son, she died two weeks ago."
Christian's eyes went wide in disbelief. Died? How, she was absolutely fine... she was...
"I'm sorry, how?" He could barely get the words out.
"Hit and run." Her mouth set into a grim line and her eyes filled with tears.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you." Christian swallowed thickly, trying to recover from the news himself.
She shook her head with a tight smile. "No you didn't. She was really loved by everyone, I guess news has been slowly spreading through the neighborhood."
Christian nodded and bid his goodbye to the older woman. He turned around to walk out when a table near the entrance caught his eye. There was a framed picture of two women in graduation robes, Ana along with another blonde who was smiling for the camera. The table was filled with single stemmed flowers of different varieties and a small notecards with messages of support and memory of Ana.
His thoughts spiraled out of control as he climbed into the back of his car to head back to the apartment.
She was breathtakingly beautiful who gave him the gift of her compassion and touch.
But she was gone.
He left her like a coward and now he was back for more but like everything else in life... he didn't deserve anything good. He fooled himself into thinking he was worthy of redemption.
Every night since then he dreamed of her voice humming and softly singing and running his hands through his hair.
'Cause tonight love feels nothing like Heaven
Don't leave me here
Leave Me Here - Hem.