A reader request! Reader is undercover in a small town overrun by a gang. Her job is to seduce and kill the leader of the gang. Since it's been a while since she made contact with the village, Jiraiya goes to check on her. Title is from an old 1950s song as I took inspiration from older songs and cabarets.
Oh sure!
Hey Jiraiya! Go walk into the lion's den and seek out the undercover spy we have stationed there and get a report from her! No biggie! It shouldn't be a problem for you. Even though we got reports of these thugs killing some of our ninja and throwing parts of their bodies at the border who accidentally passed through in uniform... You should be fine though!
Jiraiya sighed loudly with obvious annoyance. Yeah he understood why it was so vague. If the message got intercepted and description of the spy set in the town was put down, her cover would be blown. Her months of work for nothing! What's worse is that she'd be in danger without realizing it and it would be too late to get her out. But still! Annoying! He's kinda just gotta wander into a hostile town that doesn't take kindly to shinobi and step carefully with every action. The only real benefit he sees is that the spy in question was working in a cabaret. It meant drinking and at least a good show. With plenty of scantly clad women for him to stare at as they bring him his drinks. Just because he's on a mission doesn't mean he can't have fun.
The moment he stepped foot in town he was met with what he about expected. At the gate that welcomed people into town, Jiraiya was stopped by a rough looking man that patted him down for weapons while another searched his bag.
"And what business do you have on our turf?" One of the guards asked.
"Oh nothing much." Jiraiya replies casually. He's feigning ignorance about their hostility and brashness. If he's argumentative, they'll be suspicious. It's best to just slide on by as peacefully as possible. "Just passing through. Anything to do for entertainment around here?"
The punk holding his pack spoke next. "We got a bar with singing and dancing and stuff downtown." A pervy grin grows on the younger man's face. "There's this one chick... her voice... her body!"
The other guard hit his comrade. "Dude that's the boss' gal! You don't go talking like that." He turned to Jiraiya and bid him farewell with a warning. "And you! Don't start no trouble. We won't hesitate to..." He drew a line across his neck in the iconic gesture.
"Gotcha." Jiraiya said flatly. It's like being intimated by a vaudeville act. All that's missing is the jaunty music and over the top sound effects. These two don't seem so clever. But they are entertaining. Maybe they should work for the cabaret with this little number. He grabbed his stuff and moved on.
It wasn't so hard to find the cabaret. There was only a few bars in town and this one had the most traffic. The best place to start looking is where the most activity is. If you are as good as they say, you'll be either very easy to find or very hard. Plus, he's very interested in "the boss' gal" the goon talked about. She must be really something if the boss of this little rinky dink town was into her.
From what Jiraiya has gathered so far, there was some kind of take over. That much was obvious to most of the people in this corner of the land. They were all on edge and worrying about their own land. It seems a group of brigands overran and overtook the current social hierarchy. He got the five second version in the corespondents. Honestly he's walking in almost completely blind.
It was a large and short tempered group that wanted a place to call their own. They took this place and have been terrorizing the people ever since. There was rules and regulations. They killed anyone who was out it line. Their leader was a brute, but smart. He didn't trust anyone and had guards at night to protect him. Hence why the need for a mole. Your mission was to get close to the leader and assassinate him when the opportunity showed itself. But it was taking longer than expected and Jiraiya was now officially your kinda sorta reliable backup. If your assessment of the situation seemed bleak or if you were too into your cover, he's there to pull you out or assist.
Now Jiraiya has never met you, but the stories he heard about you has him excited with some high expectations. You kinda take after him in a sense. You graduated to Jounin young at seventeen and the last nine years you've been doing these kinds of jobs. Espionage was a dying art done right. And you did it right. You specialize in undercover long run missions. You do well in integrating yourself into new communities and learning from them. You got the information you needed from people quickly, since they were quick to trust you. You are unassuming and careful. Some of the elders have compared you to Jiraiya in that regard. Your caution and planning was not to be underestimated. No one would suspect a pretty woman like you was incredibly deadly. But that's the best kind! Beautiful and deadly was the sexiest combination. He's looking forward to meeting his spiritual successor.
The cabaret was packed. The room was dim and smoky. There wasn't any seats open aside a few at the bar. Everyone seemed abuzz with the show tonight. They kept whispering a name with excitement. The men were especially hopped up on the hype of this singer. Jiraiya steals a seat on a bar stool and cocks a brow at all this anticipation. Was this singer really such a show stop stunner? Or were people here that easily entertained around here? It's easy to see he's surrounded by hicks and wannabe gangsters. These peoples fun activities look like they mostly consist of toe picking and plucking at banjo strings.
Still so, if the gang leader here gets confident then more people will be in danger. There's plenty of other farms and towns nearby. They don't got a lot to protect themselves from a raid. It would be best to nip this in the bud before this group of bandits got too cocky. So why all this hold up on your end? If there was a problem Jiraiya intends to find out.
He gets a drink. He stays quiet as he sits back and listens to the chatter. His eyes scan over the crowd in search of the females in this establishment. Anyone of them could be you. You tend to gravitate to the low ranking jobs as to not stand out. He smiles at every pretty waitress that walks his way. Most of them smile back or raise a disgusted sneer. Some looked terrified. They tense when the patrons grab them, but they don't fight it. It had a vibe to it that if they did resist there would be punishment.
It wasn't long until the lights darken even more. Show lights beam and shine on the raised stage at the back of the room where everyone was staring. The red curtains flutter and wave with the obvious movement of a person behind them. The music starts. An arm peaks out of the middle of the curtains and drags slowly down the velvet material in motion with the song. A leg follows and it had a tall black heel.
It drove the crowd wild. A beautiful woman is attached to those limbs as she span out from behind the curtain. Her dress was black and sparkly. It was cut short and tight. The slow start to the music cut for a beat then started back up at a faster tempo. There was the sound of pounding on the tables as the men hit their drinks to the beat of the song.
The intro was embellished with spins and steps to an elegantly sexy dance that had her skirt flipping up. Jiraiya couldn't really look away. Huh. This was different. A good different. His eyes didn't want to leave the stage as this woman had him entranced. Then her lips parted and she sang.
Good god! She's got the body, the face, the confidence, and the voice. This woman is a threat of a different kind. Probably cunning too! The glint in her eyes is both dangerous and flirty. She had this whole crowd at her beck and call.
... Why was he here again?
At the moment Jiraiya was finding it a little hard to remember. All he really cared about was watching this rather gorgeous woman. This wasn't the first time he's been fascinated by a woman, but this was the first time he's wanted nothing more than to just... grab her. This instant attraction was new to him. He wants nothing more than to feel that body against his and listen to her breathe his name in his ear with that beautiful voice. He wants to feel her nails in his back and her body going tense as she cums. She's just... wow.
The singer is now in the crowd. The patrons were pawing at her. She nearly smiles and gently pushes them off. Jiraiya nearly fell out of his chair when she came to him. He gripped the table as her hands pulled back his kosode then ran down his bare chest. It was still in beat and rhythm of the song. Her voice right beside him was beautiful. Her lips dragged by his neck and ear. It took all his self control to not grab her. She's a performer after all. She must do this every night. It would be rude to interrupt her performance by holding her. He just feels good being the lucky guy that got felt up for the show. She pushed away from him, leaving him dazed and horny. The warmth and feel of her hands lingered on his skin for several moments. She did similar strip teases to other men in the crowd too. It seemed she targeted the ones who weren't grabbing at her. She's rewarding the good ones for containing themselves. He's never been so happy to have been trying to keep a low profile. He's absolutely smitten.
Her set of songs were very old fashioned. Things that were sang during war. The old shiny tunes that boosted a fighting man's confidence as the singer must be singing of him and of home. It's like he stepped through time while listening to her. He could almost smell the rain and smoke. Along with the crackle of the small pocket radio as it struggled to hold the signal. This type of voice was so rare and talented to sing such timeless things. But alas, it came to an end. The beautiful singer stood on stage and took a bow. There was a mix of cheering and chatter. People were yelling her name and throwing tips at her feet.
"Thank you all so much!" She yelled over the noise. "Remember! I'll be here every night! You don't gotta wait long to see me again!"
The crowd cheered as she exited the stage. Jiraiya followed her with his eyes as she went to a smoky little nook in the cabaret. She walked right up to what looked like the head honcho of this joint. Only two other men sat by him and they watched the crowd. They were especially on edge with anyone who walked a little too close. Yet they let her pass with no issues. From that alone it was safe to assume that this was the man that was leading the gang here. Most to all the patrons here were probably gang members. This was literally the belly of the beast. One wrong move and there'd be ninety people to fight.
An altercation began to go down. The singer suddenly stood back up and looked to be in a heated argument with the much larger man. He was burly for sure. Not someone a normal person can take. Jiraiya probably couldn't even knock this dude out with a tackle. It would be like head butting a brick wall. Still the same his hackles raised when he saw this brilliant singer stand on the defensive. The man stood up and slapped her.
He stood up from his seat. She stumbled backwards but didn't fall. She raised her head high in defiance and stormed off. That wasn't pretty. Jiraiya looked between Mr. Burly and the door the singer went through. Burly looked a mix between pissed and satisfied. Some other patrons were looking at Jiraiya with a bit of a frown at his odd behaviour.
This isn't professional. But a woman was in distress. Jiraiya weaved through the crowd, who didn't bat an eye at the domestic abuse. That can only mean this is common around here. He cringed at that idea and snuck out the door. It led outside to the side alley of the bar.
You stand in the dark alley trying to cool off. You sniffle and hiss as you touch your tender cheek. It's already sore from the hit. That bastard was lucky he was surrounded by his lackeys, or you would have killed him right then and there. It's infuriating that you can't hit back. You'd be offed for sure. And you've worked too hard to make a dumb slip up like that. But that didn't make it any easier to swallow. In a perfect world, you'd have his head by now.
"You alright?" Someone asked from behind you.
You whip around, ready to fight. This is still a low life town. There's been a few attempts by drunkards that tried to do something to you when you were alone. To which you beat them off of you. Ain't no one gonna hurt you in such a despicable way. They were usually too piss ass drunk to remember anything clearly, so it wasn't a big risk to beat them to a bloody pulp. Those who've tried are too ashamed to speak out. Women are still seen as second class citizens here and it's considered a great shame if a woman gets the upper hand on any man in town. Some have even been killed for standing up for themselves. It's a risk you are willing to take. Plus, no one had the balls to accuse the boss' gal of anything. It's the only good perk of this job.
But this man was no rapey drunkard or a suspicious murder. Everyone from Konoha knows who Jiraiya is, including you. He was sorta your inspiration for your approach to your military career. One of your exam papers was citing his missions and methods in a persuasive essay. It got you your title as a Jounin. To think the boys back home asked him to come check on you! It was a dream come true.
"Whoa!" Jiraiya raises his hands in surrender. "I'm not gonna hurt you. I just came to check on you. I saw what happened."
You offer him a coy smile. It'd be too easy to just say who you are. "You aren't from here are you?"
"... No." His response was careful. You'd expect no less from him. "I'm just passing through."
"On your way to where?"
He shrugs. "No where in particular. I just like to travel."
Always on guard, isn't he? His answers are deceptively vague. They sound interesting without telling you a single thing. It seems he was given no clues as to who you are in this town. He has little to no idea if you are his comrade or not. You strut closer to him. His breath stalls in his chest. He watches you the same way he watched you while you were on stage. There was a certain hunger and desire that he couldn't hide in his eyes. He practically devoured you with his gaze when he watched you dance. He bit his lip and had a white knuckled grip on the bar when you teased him during your first number. He's into you. It was fun to tease him.
You stand in front of him with only a little bit of space between your body and his. You look up at him. He was guarded. His arms folded in front of his chest, but his eyes looked over your lips with a clear interest. He looked better in real life than he did in pictures. You have his books and read them a few times. Each one had his picture on the inside of the back cover. It was interesting to see how he aged. It was graceful and appealing. It was clear to see he was older, but hard to pinpoint how old. Which is perfectly fine, isn't it? Older men are pretty sexy. They're experienced and wise.
"I guess I should have known that. I've never seen you before." You speak again. "What's your name?"
"Jiraiya." He dropped his voice to be quiet. He unfolded his arms and leaned in closer. His fingers drag over your hips lightly. He's never been so attracted to someone. "What's your name?"
You tell him the fake name everyone in this town knows you as. He repeats it barely above a whisper. His brows twitch, like he didn't quite believe that. He finally holds your waist. His hands heavy and warm on your hips. He pulled you against his body. It causes a jolt in your heart. A real flare of excitement that you haven't felt for months.
"Tell me your real name." Jiraiya whispered in your ear. "I know when someone is lying to me."
You grip handfuls of his shirt and inhale sharply. He's dominating too? This man is just suited for you. This maybe totally unprofessional, but this is really good! You've been flirting with a big ugly hairy mess of a man for months. You crave the attention from a real man like this. Attractive... powerful... amazing. Jiraiya felt like home. You finally had a piece of it back in your hands.
You move your hands up his shoulders and interlock your fingers behind his neck. You whisper your real name. It almost sounded unreal now. You haven't gone by it in so long. Your lips graze against his. He says your real name and it causes a flurry of butterflies up your belly. Hearing him say it was arousing. It was better than erotica. You have never been so attracted to someone. He's slowly revealing himself to be everything you've wanted in a partner.
His lips finally press against yours. It was soft... at first. Then Jiraiya pulled you harder against him. You pull on his neck to force him rougher on your lips. You part your lips when he does. Your tongue meets his in the middle. You fight for dominance with him on who gets to explores whose mouth first. As you do, you move your hands into his hair. It's thick and wiry, making it the perfect anchor to grip onto. His hands travel down and back. He grips your ass hard. His fingers dig into that tender meat in just the right way. It's rough but knew where to dig in to make it feel good. His hips rocked against yours with a single slow arch that expressed that need to want more.
You rut with him. You push your hips back agains his. Jiraiya won out on the battle and his tongue almost hit your throat. The strangled gasps and moans both you and him are the only noises he can focus on. When was he so into somebody where he had to just take them right then and there? He can't recall. This is the most raw sexual chemistry he's felt with someone. It's they type of feelings he writes about but never truly felt. Now he found it with you and he doesn't want to stop.
When you pulled back, there was a thin thread of saliva connecting your bottom lip to his. You grin and lick your lips. Jiraiya follows the motion of your tongue. The thread broke and hit your chin. He leans back in. He licks up the thread before kissing you again. This was too good to quit. Everything about you has him hooked.
"Wait a second." You cut him off. You give him a quick peck on the lips to satisfy him for a few moments more. "Let's do this in my apartment."
"Hm?..." He hummed. He's a little dazed. He didn't mind going at it right here in the alley.
"I'm sorry, but someone could see."
"And you don't want that?" Jiraiya ventured a guess. He took a step back. He reached out and gently ran the back of his knuckles down the cheek that was already bruising. "You'd get more than a slap for fooling around with the mysterious traveller, right?"
That touch felt right. It was the most compassion anyone has given you in months. You are leaning into it and nuzzling your cheek against his fingers before you can stop yourself. A man has never made you so weak in the knees. You never had time for things like this. You were sent off for missions too frequently to find love. But this... this you like. This you want.
"That's right..." You sigh.
You open your eyes. You didn't even know you closed them. Now the correct thing to do would be to reveal who you are now. You've fooled around long enough with Jiraiya. But you also don't want to. A gnawing thought at the back of your mind is telling you that he'd treat you differently if he knew who you were. He wouldn't touch you anymore. It'd be curt and distant, like all shinobi are when they talk to one another. You crave this intimacy. You like him. Hell... you might even love him. He's more handsome and compassionate then you'd imagine him to be. He's so attracted to you too. It's all to perfect and nice to stop now.
"I live in the yellow building a block away. Wait at least fifteen minutes before you follow me and take a different route." You instruct. You step back towards the entrance of the alley. "I'm on the second floor on the right side of the building. I'll have the window open but curtains closed. They're red."
Jiraiya looked a little gobsmacked at your plan. You whipped it up just like that? Almost like... you are a professional of a different kind. This kind of caution seemed above that of a weary singer. You turn and leave. You walk away calmly. He watches you with a curious tilt of his head. You are an intriguing woman. The type he wants a picture of just to look at and say damn. The type he finds himself watching walk away all too often. But with you, he'll hold on. You are into him just as much as he is into you. Which is sorta a first for him. He's usually interested in women who want nothing to do with him.
He spent the time gap back in the bar. He finished his drink and got some more reconnaissance in. He learned a little bit more about the structure of this town. Your stage name was being spoken back and forth. You still had a hold on these people despite not being there. Now that's a power of a different kind. If you really wanted, you could be ruling this little town. And you were already in the lap of the mob boss. It seemed like the perfect couple dynamic. With the combined power of the attractive singer whispering in the ear of the leader, it'd be doomsday for anyone trying to overthrow the leadership. It's another reason to tread with caution. Getting caught sleeping with the boss' gal could mean losing his head. But it can't be all that perfect if you're sleeping with other men and getting slapped around. That's a question he'll save for later. Cuz if he's got a chance, he wants to know about it.
Jiraiya pays his tab and leaves. No one noticed, which was good. It seems everyone was too tipsy to keep tabs on the strangers that hit their town. They are organized in some areas, yet so dumb in others. It's honestly quite the amazing feat to have such a wacky balance. Perhaps these goons are just too dim witted to think beyond their orders. He walks around the back fo the buildings on the opposite street you probably took. He even goes and extra block and loops around to the back of the yellow building. If you were that concerned to ask him to take a different route, then he'll oblige to the highest degree. There is a set of red curtains closed on the second floor. They blew into the apartment building with the soft night breeze.
It was easy to jump on the sill and peek in. You are facing away from him in front of a vanity set against the wall. Your stage makeup cleaned off and hair brushed out. Now you are pulling on the zipper on the back of your dress. You got half way when a set of warm hands take over.
The skin on Jiraiya's hands were rough. Hard and callused from traveling rough terrain and handling battles. One hand pulled on the zipper while the other ran down your newly exposed skin. The straps of your dress fall off your shoulders. The material of your dress gets pulled down by his hands.
The dress hits the floor around your feet. You turn around slowly. You smile. Some nervous butterflies do fly around in your stomach. You are going to sleep with your idol. The man who inspired your career. And he was completely infatuated with you. His eyes are dilated and focused on you. He looks over your every curve. The only thing keeping you decent is your panties. You reach out and grab the sash holding his kosode together. It falls open to reveal his torso. It's covered with a layer of the dark netted armour. Underneath it was a set of firm muscles. They were just as nice to feel this time as they were when you performed. His chest is moving quickly with a growing excitement.
Your hands are soft. Jiraiya sighs. He's wound up and tense with anticipation. His pants feel tight. He reached out and cupped your cheek. He guided you to tilt your face up to meet his eyes. Where he then pressed his lips against yours. Your fingers play along his waistline while he kisses you. It tickles a little. That area of skin was sensitive on him. The tingly feeling from your fingers felt like it was traveling down to tease him.
Your hand does that for him a moment later. The kiss broke for only a moment when he moaned. Your gentle hand snuck under his pants and grabbed his stiffening cock. Your tongue prods against his. You move your hand back and forth, stroking him off. You pull his pants down with your free hand. You broke the kiss and look down to inspect.
"Do you like what you see?" Jiraiya chuckles softly. He leans down to make out with your neck.
"Only if you like what you see." You answer.
"Heh." He laughs against your neck.
You push him onto your bed. He sits with knees apart. You pull off his pants the rest of the way. You sit on your knees between his. Your hands naturally rest on his thighs. Oh... my oh my. It seems you'll be fucked sore tonight. His cock is big enough to fill you up and bruise your insides. You may have to call in sick tomorrow. It's just the type of fuck you need. You've dealt with enough unsatisfactory men in this town.
"Hn!" Jiraiya chokes on a gasp. He grips the back of your head. He leans back. He watches you suck him off with a growing blush. You look good with something in your mouth.
It's been a while, he can admit that. Jiraiya isn't exactly a lady killer no matter how many times he tries to pick them up. Honestly he's still shocked that you agreed to do this. Such a beautiful woman should aim higher than him. You could get any man you want in this place and yet you picked him for a night of fun. It's even got that extra flare of danger since you are the favourite of the boss. Who knows how dead he'll be if anyone here found out.
You are young too... he's gathered by now that he's old enough to be your father. Which is only turning him on more. Such a pretty young woman is falling into his arms. You still have a bit of that shiny young innocence in your eyes. But uh... it certainly doesn't look innocent from this angle.
"Enough..." He lost his voice mid word. This feels blissful. But he wants more. He clears his throat and pulls you back. "That's enough. Get up here and let me fuck you."
You pull back slowly. You had his length partly down your throat. Jiraiya moans as your tongue and lips stay taught against his dick. Your lips suck and kiss the tip before releasing. He's rock hard and eager to the point of precum beading at the tip. A man has never been so eager for you. It's flattering and exciting.
The second you get to your feet, Jiraiya has his thumbs under the band of your panties. He pulled them off to your ankles. You step out of them. As you do, you raise your knees one at a time to sit on the bed. Your legs are pressed against his. Jiraiya holds on tightly to your thighs. His breathing is shallow and quick. His lips are parted as he looks between your lips and eyes.
You grab fistfuls of his hair at the back of his head. You press your lips against his. You hold his lips roughly against yours. Jiraiya digs his nails into your skin as you sink down.
"Ah..." You and him exhale at the same time.
He holds on to you as you move. You feel absolutely amazing. Hot and tight. You cry out in pleasure. Your body is pressed against his. Your nails scratch against his scalp. He's gonna lose his mind doing you. Everything from your facial expressions to the smallest swivel of your hips has him lost in lust.
"Oh Jiraiya..." You hum his name and bite your lip.
He feels pretty good. It's stretching you in a good sensational way. It's hitting in places no one else has hit before. It's pulsing and throbbing. He is rocking his hips eagerly against you. He's moaning your name. His lips a little swollen from kissing you. They meet your neck again and his teeth nibble. His hands slowly move back to hold your ass as you began to ride him. His hips and upper body move with you to stay deep inside of you. He grunts and curses when your walls tense.
You eventually push Jiraiya to lay on his back. You planted your hands on his chest for better leverage as you ride him faster. His head throws back and he cries your name. His back arches off the bed. His legs twitch and toes curl. You kept going until you came. Where he took over. He rolled and pinned you underneath him. The fast pace he fucked you at was translating how much he loved this. His hips barely met your ass before pulling back. Your nails dig into his shoulder blades. To which he hissed from the blissful pain it provided. It's better than he imagined.
Tears formed in your eyes when the second wave washed over you. He choked on a strangled moan as he buried his hips against you to savour that feeling. Then your legs were in the air while he sat up. Once that round had finished you were flipped over. Your cheek rested against the mattress as you clawed at it. He didn't miss a beat between each one as he was too excited to ever stop. He held your hip while the other hand pressed on your neck to keep you still. The sounds you made were unrestrained and perverted. Even he wasn't sure how many times he came by the time he was spent.
In the morning, Jiraiya woke up to the sensation of fingers on his chest. They ran up and down the indentation that defined his pectorals. When he opened his eyes he was met with the sight of you. Naked and barely covered by the sheets. When he smiled, you returned it. He didn't even recall drifting off. He remembers rolling off of you after finishing. Then the combined panting of you and him catching breath. Everything felt so light and warm. He could float on the clouds and drift in calm sea he was so at peace. He felt like he was milked for all he was worth in the best way possible. It must have worn him out more than he realized.
Of course you felt the same. No man has ever fucked you that good. Your entire core muscle network was stiff. But stiff in that good way. Like after a good fight. You are a little battered and bruised, but you feel high off of victory. It feels like Jiraiya was made for you. Your heart pounds as you think about all the things he did to you last night. It'd be nice to do it again. But who knows if it will. You have to tell him eventually.
You soften Jiraiya up a little by kissing him. He gladly accepts your affection. He wraps his arms around you and keeps you firm against him. It's easy to get lost in it. There's something addicting about kissing him. They know when to be soft. They know when to be rough. They are smooth and plush after a night full of making out. They are even a bit pinker. The feeling will linger and tingle for a few hours. He'll probably bite his lip all day wishing he could kiss you again.
"Promise you won't get mad?" You ask.
"I doubt there's anything you could say that'll make me mad." Jiraiya replied.
You kiss his chin and down his chest. You look up at him. "I am the undercover ninja from Konoha you are supposed to meet with."
The pleasant smile on Jiraiya's face drops. He frowns as he processes that slap in the face of information. You shrink down in shame. Lying to a comrade isn't exactly honourable. Especially when you end up sleeping with them.
"Well... that makes a lot of sense." Jiraiya finally said after a long pause.
He sat up, forcing you to sit up along with him. You straddle his lap looking for more. Was he mad? Did he take it the wrong way? You didn't just do this to get sex. It sorta just happened. You were attracted to him like a moth to a flame. Like two magnets. You are stuck to him.
Jiraiya was a little conflicted. On one hand he's happy there's a chance of a longer relationship. It was depressing to think about how being hopelessly infatuated with the local singer would have brought him more misery. Even more so since that singer was the favourite of the gang leader that took over this place. He'd be chasing a dead end relationship that could kill him or you. But on the other hand he just slept with a coworker. A coworker he's over twenty years older than. It was frowned upon and could blow the whole mission. If feelings get involved then he'd be fucked.
Yeah he's pretty much fucked. He already knows that. Whenever he looks at you his heart races. It feels both right and wrong to be with you. It can't just be lust... He barely knows anything about you. Yet he would like nothing more than to sit and learn about you. He's never wanted that before with a one nighter... This wasn't just for one night... right?
"I'm not mad." Jiraiya told you. He looked at you and smiled. "So give me the short version. What's your plan? And how can I help?"
You grow a smile yourself. You dance your fingers back up his chest up onto his shoulders. You intertwine your fingers together behind his neck. You lean in to kiss him. To which he still accepts. You lead him back down to lay on his back. His hands wonder down to grip and massage your ass.
"That's a pretty good plan." He joked. His hands travel up your back. He gently holds you back so that actual talking happens. He likes this, but there's things at stake here. "But I want to hear the real one."
"You're probably right." You sigh. It's hard. You can't get over how good he is. He's even holding your cheek again and inspecting the bruise that formed. He cares. It's been so long since someone cared. "I plan on gaining Rowen's trust and killing him. Pretty simple."
"Rowen? That's the name of the guy who runs this place then?"
"That's right."
"And how do you plan on gaining his trust?" Jiraiya inquires for more information. It can't just be that simple. He put a kiss on your cheek. Then down to your neck.
The feeling of his soft lips on your body is something you can't get over. You shut your eyes and focus on the sensation. "Hm... You probably won't like what I'm about to say."
"Try me."
Unfortunately, the only plan that made sense was to sleep with Rowen. Once you do, you'll kill him in his sleep. He found you a challenge the moment you showed up. He wanted you. He promoted you from waitress to singer just watch you preform. He pulled you into his lap and dug his fingers into your thighs with a great need. He growled in your ear how he was going to take you to bed one day.
You resisted and played the dangerous game. You refused him last night, hence why he slapped you. But you convinced him that you are harmless. Nothing but a simple small town girl with a feisty spirit. One he wants to break and control. He's really into you. Which has made it easier control some of his movements since he was thinking with his dick rather than his head.
"I plan on giving in and apologizing to him. Where I'll finally allow him to-!"
"To fuck you. Got it."
You were right. Jiraiya didn't like this plan. It's unreasonable to be jealous. But he is. You basically just said that some perverted weirdo with a power complex has been trying to rape you for the last few months. He noticed the nail marks on your thighs and finger bruises on your hips. They don't fit his and he'd never grab a woman that hard unless she was into it. Now he wants to kill this dude too. If you are being treated so poorly, imagine how the other girls get treated. That comment only seemed to motivate you more. The women in this town deserve to be treated like humans, not the toys of the gang. Your lips meet his jaw. You kiss down the length of it. It distracts him from his line of thought. He still huffs grumpily despite how good that feels.
"Don't be like that." You gently coo at him. "I'm not doing it to hurt you or anything."
It was cute to see Jiraiya jealous. He has his lips curled into a tight frown. His cheeks are pink from being called out and his eyes are casted down. He looks like a pouty little kid. You rock forward and backwards, grinding yourself against him. His pout dies off as he groans. He becomes hard in a matter of minutes of teasing. You sit up just enough to slid his cock back inside of you. You ride him slowly.
"I'd say that I would be thinking about you the whole time." You say with a teasing grin. "But that'd be disrespectful to your work."
Jiraiya exhaled a laugh. Okay fine... you are pretty great. He holds your hips and lets you control the pace. There's really no choice for him but to be okay with this. You are a smart woman. Cunning and sneaky. You'd have to be to be named his successor. It's a risky plan. But you'd be okay. You would have to be to pull it off. One false word or move too early and you'd be killed... or worse.
"What can I do?" He asked. He looks you up and down, enjoying this view immensely. "I don't think I should leave when you are so close to executing your plan. Who knows how the followers will react."
"I am hoping they'll crumble without their leader. They seem all too dependent on him." You pause. You sink down all the way and grind from side to side. "Bu..." You trail off to moan. You hit that spot and the tip of it is digging in. "But it would be nice to have you as back up in case things go south."
Jiraiya smirks. Okay so he'll stay. He's more than willing to do that. He pins you against his body before rolling over. He takes over with him on top. Now on his knees and you on your back. You keep your legs pressed against his and feet by his knees. You let your shoulders and back relax on the bed. He keeps ahold of your hips while he thrusts.
"I'll follow your lead. If there's anything you need to make this happen, I'll do it." Jiraiya said.
"Yes! Yes that sounds good!"
This is it's own brand of dirty talk. Why was it so hot to hear that he's not going anywhere? With him willing to follow your command? Maybe to stay in your bedroom awaiting your return every night. Or meeting him in alleyways with some blood and bruises speckling his body as he fights battles for you. Those rough battered hands holding you against the wooden wall while he kisses you. His lovely taste mixed with blood on his tongue. You grip the bed and your cries of pleasure fill the room.
The whole day was dedicated to this. You and Jiraiya spent hours in your bed. In between recovery time you talked. Jiraiya has lived an interesting life. It was nice laying your head on his chest and listening to him. His fingers would drag up and down gently on your back as he spoke of his experiences. All his successes. All his failures. He didn't know why, but he found himself talking about his life. It's something he's never done. For some reason, he found it easy to talk to you. He could open up and just speak his mind around you. You listened... No one really listened to him like that. With compassion and understanding that made his throat constrict with emotions he once buried deep inside. It's just... nice to finally have someone to talk to again.
In turn you spoke of yourself. Born and raised in The Hidden Leaf. Your love of music started as a child. Both your parents were musical. With your mother a ninja and your father the conductor of the community concert band. She fell in love with him watching him conduct his band with such enthusiasm and excitement. He fell in love with her and her voice. She only sang for him as she was shy to show her talent. Then later she sang to you.
"What happened to her?" Jiraiya asked. "You talk about her like she's gone."
"She died." You explain. You adjust in his grasp and tuck your face away under his chin. He tenses at your words.
"How?"
"She was one of the casualties of the Nine Tails attack ten years ago."
Jiraiya gripped you harder. That attack hurt him too. He understood what it was like to lose someone to such a brutality like a tailed beast. He had no idea you lost someone too. From how you speak, it was clear you were close to your mother. He didn't interrupt as you continued to speak about it. He stroked your head in a soothing and slow way to keep you in comfort as you talk.
Ever since then, you didn't like to sing anymore. You used to with your mother and it's now just a painful reminder that she's gone. But when this job came around, you had no choice. It's not fun singing the songs you sing on stage. It's not like the songs you sang with your mother. It was your father who liked the older songs like that. He trained you to sing them since songs of war reminded him of mother. They were his favourite and she sang them for him. But it felt like a hollow reminder. He was desperate to find her in you. You sounded exactly like she did when she sang. It was sad and damaging to see your father only pay attention to you when you sang. He practically disowned you when you continued your career in the military. It killed your mother. It'll only kill you. Maybe it's why you like these missions. Ones that take you far away for a long time. Away from it all...
"What do you like to sing?" Jiraiya had to ask.
"I don't know anymore." Was your answer.
His chest moved with a deep breath. It rocked your body with the motion. He held you close and kissed the top of your head. He strokes your back and quietly apologized. You sigh and keep your face nuzzled in that space between his head and shoulder. Making you upset wasn't his intention. He just wanted to know about you.
"Maybe I can help you find what you want to sing." He whispered.
His statement brought a great amount of comfort. Jiraiya was officially the first person not to tell you that you should just get over it. He had similar pains to you, so he understood where others didn't. You tilt your head up and kiss right under his ear.
"Okay." You agree. Learning to love a hobby you once did wasn't a bad idea. It already felt like he was the key to unlocking that adoration for singing again. Back when you were on stage, it looked like he was actually listening to you... it felt good for once.
For a few days, Jiraiya stuck around in your apartment. He helped you break down the steps for your plan. He was an encouraging presence. He was wise and well versed in this subject. It was nice to have him support you throughout this tense process. But there was still a bit of an awkward energy between you and him.
The inevitability that this relationship will end soon was hanging around. Neither you or Jiraiya wanted to put a title on it. Lovers. Partners. Something in between. The moment it becomes defined is the moment it becomes too real. He made it clear that he was going to go his separate way from you once this was over. It would hurt too much to actually say how you feel. He didn't say it either. But something shone in his eyes when he looked at you. That or you are too hopelessly desperate that he likes you like that too when he doesn't.
It's unrealistic. Jiraiya stayed up all night fighting with himself. He can't ask you to be anything with him. You had a home. You had a career that you were still defining. He can't just ask you to be with him. To run away and live how he does. Sleep under the stars or in strange beds around the world. Yet when he looks at you, especially when he watches you leave, the words rise and almost leave his mouth. Come with me... I love you.
He's scared you'll say yes.
He's even more scared you'll say no.
"I'll give you until midnight." Jiraiya said instead.
"Midnight?" You question.
"If you aren't here by midnight, I'm going to come for you."
You smile at him. That's the most reasonable thing he's proposed all day. Yesterday he suggested this completely over the top plan than involved him impersonating one of the guards and following you. Or making trouble and getting caught in hopes he'd be brought to Rowen while you were still there to give you some back up. Yeah you pointed out that those plans could go wrong very easily. However, it is still your mission. You insisted that you should do it alone without the interference of a worry wart. He's not trying steal all the glory from you or anything. He cares. He wants you to be safe.
Tonight is the night you are going to kill Rowen. Jiraiya has been on edge and fidgety all day. He looked tired and plagued with too many thoughts. He still didn't like you had to sleep with someone. He didn't like that you were going in alone. There was plenty he didn't like about this, but he helped you all he could without overstepping his boundaries. You hold his face and kiss him.
"Okay." You simply agree. "I promise I'll be out before then."
"I'm holding you to that."
"I know."
Jiraiya bit his lip as you slid away. Your hands dragged along his arms. You held his hands for a few seconds before breaking free. You are wearing your sexiest dress with your sexiest undergarments. He felt a strange mix of pain, fear, and worry. It was all irrational since he knows you can take care of yourself. But you are still walking into the claws of a monster ready to devour you. He's got a right to be a little bit on edge... right?
The darker night fell, the more anxious he got. Left alone with his thoughts made him high strung. The closer it got to midnight, the harder it got to breathe. He stared at the door. He glanced occasionally to the clock. The ticking of it began to sound like it was mocking him.
By eleven thirty, Jiraiya began to pace. His heart was hammering. By eleven forty, he was chewing on his thumbnail and staring at the clock. At eleven fifty, he couldn't take it anymore. Was it insane to assume you'd be home by now? Are you okay? Are you hurt? Were you found out? He sucks in a sharp breath between his teeth. Okay. Okay he'll just go outside and wait on the street. The sooner he can see you the sooner he can relax.
He opens the door and nearly jumps. His high strung body tensed with the expectation to block or counter at the sight of a person in front of him. Then his brain catches up a second later. He recognizes this figure. You. Thank god its you! You are alive! But not unharmed.
You watch Jiraiya's relief turn into worry and horror. You really aren't okay. Your dress is ripped and bloody. Your stockings are worse with rug burns and cuts on your knees. Your lip is split open and swollen. There's a few cuts on your face and neck. He says your name im shock as you fall into his arms. You cling onto him and sniffle back your tears. There's instant comfort when he holds you.
"What happened?" He asked. He slowly sunk to his knees with you in his arms. From there he could pull you closer into his lap.
"I-I couldn't do it. I couldn't have sex with that man." You explain in a small shaky voice. "When I backed out, he got so... mad. I didn't have any real weapons a-and I struggled with how much stronger he was. He took me by surprise and I reacted too slowly." You press your forehead on Jiraiya's chest. Your voice drops to a whisper. "But I got him... he's dead."
"Were you..." Jiraiya couldn't even speak the word. A lump formed in his throat. The idea of it was awful enough to imagine.
"No... No I wasn't hurt like that." You offer a bit of ease. "I got him before he could do anything more to me."
Your story made bubbles rise in Jiraiya's throat. He's mad enough to froth from your experience. You went through hell. It's disrespectful to curse the dead... but what a scum bag that burly bastard was! Truly disgusting. How could anyone be so cruel to a nearly defenceless woman? It's by some good fortune that you are quick on your feet and a calculated fighter. Any other girl in this town would have suffered a worse fate. You are a hero. You shake your head in denial when he called you that. This didn't feel very heroic. Taking a life is never really a heroic act.
"No... It isn't. But you saved plenty of other people from the same thing." Jiraiya offered some words of comfort. He's done enough of these kinds of hits to understand this line of thinking. He didn't like it either.
He picked you up from the floor. You are shaky and upset. Which isn't a weakness. While it's expected for shinobi to be emotionless, it doesn't mean it's required. Nor is it normal. Hell, all of Jiraiya's life choices in the military has been dictated by his emotions. It's what makes humans human after all. Any sane person would be shaken by this experience. He wasn't even there and he feels your pain.
Jiraiya gets you cleaned up of the blood all over you and changed. He had to bite back his anger when he saw the state of your skin. Getting worked up over it might upset you more and he didn't want do that. The nail marks were plenty. There's bruises forming along your thighs and shoulders. The band of your bra was pulled on so hard it cut your back. It's a good thing that nasty person was dead. Or else he'd kill that bastard for hurting the woman he loves. Jiraiya took great care in wrapping your wounds in bandages. He got you into bed and joined you. You held onto him all night while you calmed down. You do fall asleep, if only because the encounter earlier was so draining. But Jiraiya didn't sleep. He stayed up thinking.
The next day was liberating. The brigands were confused and scared. They didn't discover Rowen's body until the morning. At the sight of their leader dead, most did disband. They ran back to the woods they descended from. They scattered and their hierarchy fell. The few who tried to stand their ground were overtaken by rallied townspeople. They saw their opportunity to stand when there was panic and fear among their tormentors.
"Well... you were right." Jiraiya said.
You and him were watching the chaos from the roof of the yellow building. He has his hand on yours. You were pretty quiet. You have been since you woke up.
"It seems like they can take care of themselves." You say. You turn and look at your... something. He's not quite a lover or a significant other. "My mission is a success... I... I can go home now."
"Yeah..."
"Where will you go?"
He sighs. He looks at you with a form of apology. "I don't know. I never have a place in mind when I travel."
You grip his hand. "Is this goodbye then?"
"Don't think about it like that." Jiraiya pulled on your hand to force you to step closer. You are teary eyed and sad. He wiped away the tear that fell down your cheek. "I never say goodbye. It sounds like it's forever."
He paused. He leans down. His lips meet yours. You hold onto him. It never changed. It still felt exciting and right to kiss him. When he breaks it and steps back, there's already a void. You miss how it feels to be near him.
"I..." Jiraiya's mouth hangs open as he hesitates on his words. "I'll miss you."
It's really happening then. Jiraiya isn't coming home with you. You hoped he would. Yet that idea also scares you. When you met him a week ago, you had no idea you'd fall in love. It happened so fast. People say they fall gently in love when really it's like tripping and careening off a cliff. It's scary, fast, and a complete surprise. Whether Jiraiya is there to catch you at the bottom or not is the question that's still unknown. But it's starting to feel like you'll be falling forever with no one to catch you.
"I'll miss you too." You say quietly.
Perhaps it's best to learn to let go. If he didn't want to stay with you, then you shouldn't push it. It looks as if love just wasn't meant for you.
Jiraiya was gentlemanly enough to walk you to the entrance of the town. He had to head in the opposite direction. You hold on for as long as possible. You kiss him and savour the feeling. He indulged in it as well. He held your waist as he kissed you. It's hard to let go. But... it's all the what if's that are scaring him. He's fallen in love again. It's so late in his life that it didn't feel fair. To you or him. After plenty of thinking he convinced himself it's best to let go. He was wrong before. He keeps chasing things he shouldn't have. Don't fall for the woman he could have raised himself because he's so much older than her. Don't fall for the girl focused on her career. Don't fall for the girl... even if you are in love with her. There's no way you could give her the same things as other men. Don't ya know better by now?
When you left, he stared at your back for a long time. You eventually disappear over the horizon. For a long... long time Jiraiya stood there. He didn't want to take a step away from you. At least just staying in the town meant he wasn't farther away. He spent the night at the bar. The cabaret he met you at was busy with a different crowd. The stage was lively with the locals celebrating. They danced and sang. They were getting plastered as the drinks were on the house in celebration of liberation. That stage looks so different without you on it. Your stunning image shining on the platform and you beautiful voice echoing around the room. It was empty without you. He picked and prodded at his drink, not feeling much of an appetite to even get drunk.
Jiraiya spent hours trying to convince himself he's doing the right thing. But if it's right, why did it hurt? He's getting tired of doing the right thing and having it hurt. It's like giving himself up piece by piece to other people and getting nothing in return. All he's really got left is his heart. And it's aching for you.
He shuts his eyes and sees you. Your pretty eyes. Your smile. Your face. Your honey sweet silky smooth voice whispering in his ear. The way you hum when you drift off to sleep in his arms. The feeling of your hand stroking his chest. Your leg caressing up his.
Comforting you when you cried. Learning about your past. The sense of security when he told you his. The way you accepted it and comforted him... no one did that for him before. Feeling that rage surge in his blood when he saw you hurt. Feeling childish with jealousy when other men pawed at you during your sets. It's just... nothing he's ever felt before. These emotions are so intense. It was as if the moment you touched him, you reached his heart. Everything you did affected it.
It's not like him. He's Jiraiya! A man that's not supposed to pine for women anymore. It hurts too much! He can't do this again!
So don't.
There's a voice of reason somewhere in his head. Jiraiya frowns as it began to undo the excuses he focused on. The ones he convinced himself that you can't be the woman for him... no matter how he feels. You couldn't possibly feel the same because of these things.
She's too young.
Really? Because you seemed to like that about her. And is it really a big deal? She's smart and mature for her age. Smoking hot too! Ain't she just the right type of lass to be your one and only research material? She even reads your books! She's perfect!
She's got a whole career ahead of her.
So? She can work on it and refine it with you. You've always had missions that require skills like hers. Wouldn't it be nice to work with someone on your level again?
She's got a home in the village.
... Homes don't have to be the structure or place one comes from. You could be home.
What if she has someone else?
Okay now you're just bullshitting yourself. She's done nothing but be into you and want you since you met her.
Why do I do this to myself?
Because you realize too late that it is okay to be happy. You can be happy with her. You were happy with her. So go be happy with her.
Isn't it too late? I pushed her away.
It's never too late. There's always a chance. You know she feels the same. She'll take you back.
"Gahhhh!" Jiraiya cried out in frustration at his own mind. He plunked his face onto the bar. It thunked dully on the wood like his head was made of the same material. It the moment it really felt like that.
Is this what breaking up feels like?
All you want to do is curl up in the comfort of your home. With blankets and pillows. With ice cream and alcohol. You want to look at the pictures of Jiraiya you have. Which was only in the books he authored. You wanna read his books and cry. You wanna hug your dusty pillows and wish it was him. You miss how warm he was. How he smelled. His thick lovely locks and how they felt in your hands. His deep voice that's so easy to listen to.
"So how was Jiraiya?" Hiruzen, Lord Hokage himself, brought you out of your thoughts. "I certainly hope my student was pleasant to you. I know how he can get sometimes!" He laughed happily at his joke.
At the moment you were standing in the Hokage's office. Your leader wanted you in person to give the play by play on your mission. Disbanding a whole gang was a great achievement. One that not many in the ninja world can brag about.
"He was..." You trail off. Even talking about him makes you want him. And while you do like this sagely old man, you don't want to blab about your feelings. Or give him the details on all the extracurricular activities you did with his student. You smile even though you don't really feel like smiling. "He was great. He really helped me pull this off."
"Really? That's good to hear." The older man was surprised. "He was rather... how to put this." He grinned with a lifetime of recollection of his most rascally student. "Snarky when he replied to my message to provide you back up. He doesn't like to work with people very often. It's nice to hear he gets along with one of our brightest."
You beam at his words. Being called bright by the Hokage is high praise. "Thank you, sir."
"He sent another message."
You raise your head. Your brows furrow. What could he mean? Hiruzen is smiling with a knowing that is easy, yet hard to place. He always gave off that very wise but cryptic vibe. Friendly but not one that should be crossed. Especially when it comes to his children, students and blood alike. He pulled out a piece of paper and read it over silently.
"I've never seen Jiraiya speak so highly of someone." He said with that same smile. "He's recommending you get promoted to something else. Special Ops or something to the like."
Oh Jiraiya... He really said that? You can feel your cheeks get warm. All of you gets warm. Hearing him say that he recommended you made you get those warm fuzzies. He gave you warm fuzzies. You long to see him. Sigh. Why did he say goodbye? While he said it wasn't goodbye... it did feel like you wouldn't see him again. The relationship ended before it began because of the fear of starting it. And that it ended for good.
You slowly open your mouth to speak, intending on politely declining an offer like that. It didn't feel truly earned. While Jiraiya had your best intentions in mind, it would feel better earned if you gained a promotion by yourself. A ruckus just outside the door halted you. The Hokage's Estate doesn't usually have ruckus. When it did it usually meant something bad was happening. You look over your shoulder as the noise got closer. It was a mix of heavy quick footsteps and exclamations from the staff being pushed.
"Hey watch it!"
"What the hell?!"
"Ow! That was my foot!"
These were some of the things being yelled. Among that was cursing and more thunks. The door was flung open. Your body goes tense and you gasp. Your heart feels like it's beating and flying all around your chest with an anxious excitement. Your eyes lock with his and it all felt like things were meant to be.
"I need to talk to you." Jiraiya announced. He was frazzled and out of breath. He tore cheek to get here as quickly as possible. He looked like a mad man running around the village in search of you. He tried everywhere and of course, this was the last place he thought of. In his haste, logic failed to enter his head. Like duh! Where else does a ninja go when they finish a mission? The god damn estate! He'd kick himself right now if he could.
"I'm in the middle of something." Hiruzen spoke, confusing this comment for him.
"Not you, old man!"
Only Jiraiya could get away with speaking so harshly to the Hokage. The older man was unimpressed but not surprised by his student's disrespect. Ain't nothing new, but what is new is Jiraiya wanting to speak with someone he worked with. What business could he still have with you? It must be important if he came all the way back here. Hiruzen sat back and watched this unfold with interest.
The moment Jiraiya focused back on you, he smiled. He walked towards you and stopped a fraction from colliding with you. You reach out and rest your hands on his chest. The warmth of his skin was good to feel again. The beat of his heart could be felt in your hands. His hands rest on your hips. It was good. It was everything you missed.
"I told you it wouldn't be the last time you saw me." Jiraiya said with a small laugh.
It feels right to hold you again. It's all he could think about since you left. Seeing your face again along with that pretty smile of yours has put the worry he had at ease. It was hard to sleep at night without you. It was hard to imagine even sleeping alone even though he's done it all his life. It was good with you there. It's not good with you not there. He was so restless he traveled throughout the night to get here quicker. Now that he was near you again, he could drop here and fall sleep. His worried heart is at peace.
"Why did you come?" You ask him quietly. It's hard to believe he's here. He's holding you again and looking at you with that expression that caused goosebumps along your skin.
"I needed to tell you how I feel."
You stare into his eyes, searching for what he wants. It's hard to tell what it is, but it's shining with a real honesty. Your heart is pounding.
"And what do you feel for me, Jiraiya?" You ask.
A part of you is still afraid to know. But the rest of you wants to know. If he feels how you feel then it should be fine. More than fine! It'll be everything you want. He pulls you against him. Your body pressed against his. You raise your hands up to lock your fingers behind his neck. It's a strange echo of the first time you and him kissed. He leans down until his lips a a fraction from yours. The ends of his bangs tickle your cheeks.
"I'm in love with you." He uttered softly.
Those words steal your breath. It's everything it's supposed to be and more. There's tonnes of weight lifting off of your shoulders. That sense of hopelessness and sadness had left. There's a flood of joy strong enough to banish the pain of being away from him.
"I love you too." You say even softer. You can't find your voice to speak any louder. Not that you needed to. These words are only for him.
You pull on his neck to close the distance. How you longed to kiss Jiraiya again. It's just as good as it was the first time. Maybe better now that you knew what it was like. You rise on your toes and press yourself harder against him. Your fingers run through his hair. His hands run up and stroke your back.
At the same time as him, you pulled back. You are breathless and panting. Jiraiya is too. He sighs quietly with a sense of relief. You do feel the same! He feels foolish for hesitating and elated that this went as well as it could have. You are showered and accepting of all the kisses he keeps giving you. After a few moments both you and him are reduced to quiet giggles. The same amount of giddiness was felt by you and your partner. Lover. Beloved. Dearest. He's all these things to you. You are all these things to him.
"This explains quite a lot!" Hiruzen's jovial voice cut the mood.
You stood there flushed as the Hokage exclaimed how happy he was that two of his most brilliant spies had fallen in love. Jiraiya was about fifteen shades of red in the face as he stood there in the office with you. He's embarrassed of the grand gesture he pulled in front of his teacher. He usually didn't cause scenes like this. Nor did you. Both you and him are used to staying in the crowd. Always quiet and blending in. Suddenly having attention was horrifyingly different. You hold his hand. He refused to let it go and squeezed yours tightly. It was the only comfort he had as Lord Hokage was practically asking when the wedding is. This maybe absolutely embarrassing, but it went well. You had him and he had you.
That night Jiraiya took you on a real date. No bars. No sneaking around. No jumping through windows or walking around buildings. Just you and him out on the familiar streets of Konoha. After a nice dinner, you took him back to your apartment. He was quick to undress you and throw you in bed. He crawled on over top of you with a big grin. You held onto him, finding that grip in his hair. His hands traveled down your sides and rested on your ass. He kissed some of the healing wounds on your body, slowly making his way to your lips. Your lips and his barely left each other. On the rare occasion they did, it was to take in air or moan each other's names. It was a night of absolute bliss.
Ever since then, you and Jiraiya have never been parted. It took a little bit of paperwork to be filed under a different title with different freedoms, but you were able to travel with him. You are now an S Rank ninja with loyalty to a village. You could run free while still being able to make a difference in the world. Your career in spying and espionage was well refined with Jiraiya there to help you out. It was so easy to follow his lead, or he'd fall in stride to yours. No one thought to question the authenticity of the stories and covers you weave with your darling second half.
As the year keeps going, Jiraiya notices something. He doesn't bring it up out of fear it would stop. Your singing was a precious gift rarely enjoyed. It meant a lot when you started to sing around him. Quiet and poetic songs that you sing while doing mundane tasks. Whether it's preparing dinner or packing up camp, your lovely voice filled the usually quiet moments of life. You began to do it more while cuddling with him. Your soft hums while laying with him filled his ear. It was the perfect lullaby to fall asleep to. You sang a pattern of nas and las when sitting in his lap while he wrote. Your finger curling a section of his hair while you sang your gentle tunes. It was his definition of peace.
It quickly grew to comfort him. The sound of your singing could bring him down from a severe rage or a chest crushing panic attack. On the occasion where he couldn't compose himself and it all got too much he needed to hear the gentle hums of his beloved. Jiraiya could find it through the storm of overtaking emotions that deafened him to all other sounds. You were the calm in the storm. The one thing that could break apart through everything. You are his siren. But you don't lure him away to drown him. You lure him to make him better. And when he was upset, he needed you. When nothing else would do it he went to you. He put his arms around you and whisper one request.
"Sing... please."
You always comply. You open your mouth and sing whatever came to mind. Singing wasn't a painful reminder anymore. It was a celebration. It brought you the man you love. That's all it reminded you of now. Not of the love you lost, but the love you gained. Your mother would have been proud. She would tell you that singing to the one you love was the purest form of expressing how much you love them.
Jiraiya was your everything now. When you sing, you sing for him. You sing about what it's like to be with him. Even if you can't form the words, you know what it means. He does too. It means more than just saying it.
Jiraiya has a good singing voice... No matter how much he says he sucks. He flushes so red and grumbles something about sounding like one of his toads. Or that the dogs must be howling. But he always tries. He wants to express his love for you as you do and wants to do it together.
It's not as bad as he thinks. He's just unpracticed, that's all. It's a sweet gesture. It's made even more sweet with the added fact that he's incredibly timid about it. Jiraiya is so shy about this that he'll only sing with you when he knows you and him are alone. Its only meant for your ears anyways. You smile at him as he harmonizes with you. His face red and face cringed in concentration. His mouth open as he holds a wavering note. You hold his hands just as tightly as he holds yours. You smile as you sing with him.