Authors Note: This is my first attempt at a Hitsugaya/Rukia pairing. I am an avid IchiRuki shipper, but it never hurts to expand your horizons. I hope you enjoy reading, and leave me a little love to help encourage me to continue. Pardon if Hitsugaya is a little OOC. He's hard to pin down personality wise, especially in this kind of story. Thanks!
- Rated for later chapters (language, suicidal thoughts, smoking, possible lemon, blood, etc.)
- Placed in Drama/Romance, but if you deem it as something different, let me know.
White Phoenix
...
Hitsugaya Toshirou shifted uncomfortably in his sleep, a chill sweeping over his body. In his ears rang the sound of the rain, and the roars of a monster creeping through shadows beneath his eyelids. The darkness was unbearable, but as he fought to wake up his mind had the advantage. He felt colder than usual.
"H-Hitsugaya…taicho…" Her voice was weak, and frail. Each breath was raspy, broken, and sounded as though each were the last. Hitsugaya held her hand tight and never lost contact with her eyes.
"I'm here." He promised. He never once saw the blood pooling around his knees as he knelt beside her, her once lively eyes dull and fading. She took a sharp breath. "I couldn't let him hurt you…taicho."
How it ended up this way, Hitsugaya did not know. Oh, how he wished that he was the one lying on the ground, not her. The clouds rolled in from the west, and thunder roared as it caught up with the rain that now began to trickle slowly from the dark skyHe heard the fight but Hitsugaya did not want to leave her side. How could he, when she saved his life?
"I'm sorry, taicho." She wheezed quietly. He shook his head rapidly. "No, no…don't be sorry…you have done nothing wrong Matsumoto." His eyes were burning, and his knees shook beneath him, but still he sat vigil by her side.
She smiled weakly. "Please Hitsugaya-taicho. I failed you."
"You never failed me Matsumoto." He replied softly. She noticed how fearful he was; his eyes betrayed his voice.
"But I did. Look at where I am now," She feebly argued. Her eyes, though dim, still had some kind of spark in them; the spark that gave him hopes she would somehow survive this. Matsumoto coughed, and blood covered her hand. Hitsugaya could feel a lump in his throat as he watched her heave loudly and wipe blood on her kimono, as if it were natural. He squeezed her hand and neared her face.
"Matsumoto, I promise…I will not let you die."
She frowned and turned her head painfully to gaze into his eyes directly. "Do not make promises you cannot keep, Hitsugaya-taicho."
"I will keep this promise, Rangiku!" He shouted angrily, never once letting go of her hand. He could feel its warmth escaping into the damp air. She was his vice-captain, and friend; she couldn't die on him now. Not after all they had been through.He turned his head to listen in on the footsteps coming near, and at once noticed the reiatsu of Ikkaku approaching.
"Hitsugaya-taichoMatsumoto fukutaicho! The menos is gone." Ikkaku stood above them, out of breath and sheathing his zanpakutou. Ikkaku had a bloodied face, but did not seem to mind; in fact, he had a satisfied gleam in his eye. Hitsugaya's features darkened. "Matsumoto has been fatally wounded. Help see to it that she gets to Squad Four safely." She coughed again, but it was quieter. Ikkaku's gleam vanished.
"No, Hitsugaya-taicho. I don't think I will last that long." Ikkaku stood a ways off, his face etched with a grave expression. "You don't think I could get you back in time, is that it?" He asked gently. She nodded.
Hitsugaya subconsciously cupped her cheek with his hand, a small, broken smile on his lips. "Everything will be okay, Rangiku."
She sighed and what Hitsugaya thought was a smile appeared on her pale face. "…I always liked it when you called me that…Toshirou." She whispered. His smile grew slightly, though it was sad.
"…and…I—"
Hitsugaya could feel her grip slacking as she began to close her eyes, the last bit of warmth escaping her body. "Toshirou-sama…forgive me…" She rasped
"There is no need for me to forgive you, Rangiku! Just don't go! I won't let you die on me!"
She smiled again. "It needs to be this way, taicho. I'll be with you in spirit. Thank you for always…being there for…me…"
The last bit of light escaped her eyes as she fell limp onto the wet cement. With a muffled, intense growl Hitsugaya's body began shaking with grief. He never once let go of her warm hand as he looked up at Ikkaku, who still stood across from him, frozen. The rain hid tears, but Hitsugaya knew they were there. "Please, Ikkaku. Go and tell the others. I…I will take her back into Sereitei."Ikkaku nodded, and took off.
He picked up her wilted, lifeless body and opened the door to Sereitei, watching as Ikkaku disappeared into the darkness of the night, the rain and mist devouring the landscape around him. The rain was his tears; for none could fall down his face.
"Where will I be without you, Rangiku Matsumoto?"
--
"Hitsugaya-taicho…"
He could faintly hear her voice, echoing in his head. When he looked up, Matsumoto was running towards him, her blonde hair flowing in the wind and a bright smile on her face. It was the face he was so used to; the face before it became grey with death. With an outstretched arm, he reached for her, hoping that she truly came back to him. Hitsugaya's heart raced.
"I'm here, Matsumoto."
"Hitsugaya-taicho…"
"I'm here…"
"Hitsugaya-taicho!"
With a jolt, he was awoken from his deep sleep by the vigorous shaking of his shoulders. He looked up to see Ayasegawa standing above him, a tight grip on the captain's upper arm; he was apparently worried when Hitsugaya did not answer the first time. The captain narrowed his eyes.
"Ayasegawa, what are you doing here?" He demanded, still shaken up from his dream. It felt as though he had relived that dreadful night all over again. Ayasegawa seemed taken aback, but kept his calm as he stood before the white-haired captain.
"It is mid-morning, taicho. I was sent to ensure you were okay. Yamamoto-genryusai requests your presence."
Hitsugaya shoved himself away from him, avoiding his concerned gaze. Where in all of Sereitei did they get the idea that he was anywhere near okay? When Hitsugaya did not respond, Ayasegawa sighed with resignation and bowed deeply.
"I am sorry to bother you. Really I am. But you missed the meeting this morning, and I was sent to see where you were. The captains were curious."
"Are you sure it was just the captains?" Hitsugaya replied dully as he plucked a stray paper clinging to his arm. He realized he must have dozed off on the desk. The night before was a blur. Suddenly Hitsugaya felt as though his nerves were falling apart all over again, if that were possible.
Ayasegawa nodded fervently, but added, "Also Yamamoto-genryusai. They are worried."
"There is no need to be worried. I will go and see him now." Hitsugaya said as he stood from his desk and briskly walked out of the room, leaving Ayasegawa to stare after him in amazement. "Poor Hitsugaya-taicho. This definitely isn't beautiful."
Hitsugaya's head hung low as he trudged through the corridors, ignoring every whisper and stare he received from his fellow Shinigami. They must have heard the story by now. The sun was bright as it reflected off of the wooden planks, but it might as well have been raining; there was no more sun in his life.
"Hitsugaya-taicho, ohayoo gozaimasu." A familiar voice called out. He looked up to see Ikkaku standing before him, eyes drooping and hollow. Hitsugaya figured he shared the same restless nights, but it could have been a party with enough sake to drown out the world.
"Ohayhoo, Ikkaku." Hitsugaya replied, waving his hand as he walked on by him, neither seeming to be in the mood to talk.
"You are going to see Yamamoto-genryusai, correct?" Ikkaku asked out of the blue, turning towards the captain.
Hitsugaya stopped and nodded curtly, his back still turned. "Yes, I am." Ikkaku nodded in reply and continued walking in the other direction.
When he reached the meeting room, he inhaled deeply before pushing the flaps aside. He was not sure what to expect, but better to be prepared. Yamamoto was already sitting on the floor, Unohana and Byakuya sitting on either side of him. Unohana seemed worn out from the nights before; there had been several injuries during the attack that dark night.
"Hitsugaya-taicho, thank you for joining us." Yamamoto said gruffly as he shifted on his pillow. Hitsugaya merely looked up to acknowledge him, but said nothing. He dropped himself onto the floor before them, his gaze directly below theirs.
Byakuya sat up strait, and Yamamoto cleared his throat. "I suppose you know why you are here?"
"Not really." He replied shortly. For all Hitsugaya knew, three weeks had passed and they brought up one of his squad members to be lieutenant.
"We need to know what happened that night during the Menos attack," Unohana explained, her kind voice giving him a rush of relief. She was the only one in the room who knew how to treat someone in his condition, or even be gentle.
Yamamoto nodded in agreement as he held a tea cup with fragile fingers. "Please taicho. It has been three days since the attack. We need to know what all happened."
Three days…three weeks…what does it matter?
Hitsugaya shifted uncomfortably where he sat across from them, their gazes piercing into his very soul. Sure, it had been three days, but there was no way in hell it was enough time for him put the attack in order. He lost his dearest friend and lieutenant. "You make it sound so simple." Hitsugaya murmured.
Unohana sighed softly. "Please…we must have your account. I know it is not simple. We would like to give you more time, but there is not a lot of time left." He looked up into her soft eyes and saw her own sadness. She shared the grief with him, and understood his pain. Quietly he stood from where he sat, and held his head high in an attempt to shake off his sorrow.
"Three nights ago, we were attacked by a menos, which somehow managed to duplicate itself," He started, catching eyes with each of them. "They were more powerful than we had initially thought, and many were caught off guard. The first menos was not so difficult, for six of our Shinigami took him down without hesitation. The second one…" He trailed of and inhaled slowly.
Unohana silently pleaded for him to continue, so he obeyed.
"The second one had a strange reiatsu, and so it had been decided that…M-Matsumoto-fukutaicho, Renji-fukutaicho, Ikkaku, 3rd seat of 11th division, and myself would take on the challenge. Renji-fukutaicho was able to stun him with Zabimaru, but only got so far. He was injured. In the end, Ikkaku made the final blow, but only because…" He swallowed hard. "Because Matsumoto-fukutaicho had been fatally wounded in battle, and I stayed by her side until the menos had been destroyed. I knew Ikkaku could handle it."
After he finished his rendition of the attack, and dealing with his shattered nerves at mentioning his beloved vice-captain now departed, he sat down with shaking knees. Yamamoto ruffled his beard in thought. "I see," He said.
"Yes," Unohana said quietly, her eyes finding the floor. "Matsumoto's injuries were severe. She would have never made it to Sereitei in time."
Hitsugaya could feel his heart fall out of his chest; Matsumoto had been correct. She knew how badly hurt she had been, and knew it was better to die where she was: in her captain's arms. Hitsugaya quivered, and swore he could feel the room spinning around him as he attempted in vain to sit up straight.
"Hitsugaya-taicho," Byakuya started, his voice shockingly soft, "I know you are grieving, and rightfully so. But you cannot go for much longer without a vice-captain. It is necessary for every division to have one consistently."
Yamamoto sighed sadly. "Indeed, Byakuya-taicho is right. And I am correct in assuming you have not considered another for the position?"
Hitsugaya shook his head solemnly as he glanced up into their gazes again. Their stares were heavy against him. "I have not." He said bitterly. He did not want to replace Matsumoto, and before her untimely death he thought he would never have to.
"I have a solution that may help you, then." Byakuya offered. Hitsugaya turned his attention on him. Byakuya's stare never wavered, and caused Hitsugaya to shiver. "And what solution is that."
"She is training to become lieutenant, and needs all of the help she can get. This is not the opportunity I wanted, but it is the only other option she has. Ukitake has other matters to deal with, and I wanted to know if she could work under you for a while."
"Who is she?" Hitsugaya asked flatly, eyes never blinking as he looked Byakuya over once. His curiosity could be seen, though he would never admit to something as foolish as being curious.
"Rukia." He replied curtly. The room awaited a certain response from the white-haired captain, but there was none; he merely stood up and nodded. "Very well. If that is what you wish." He stated, looking at Yamamoto, who nodded as well. It seemed that the matter had been settled; Rukia Kuchiki was to be Hitsugaya's new temporary lieutenant.
Unohana clapped her hands together once, and stood swiftly. "Now that that is settled, please Hitsugaya-taicho, come and rest in the infirmary for a while. We will find someone to take care of your business. Your nerves are frayed."
She was right. He could feel his insides squirming irritably, which he assumed from a lack of food and sleep. He followed her out of the room quietly as she led him towards Squad Four's headquarters to rest. Byakuya and Yamamoto glanced at each other.
"Do you think this will be good for her?" Yamamoto asked Byakuya sternly. "Never before has a Shinigami of no rank been placed in position, let alone in another squad other than their own." They locked eyes, and then Byakuya stood and brushed off his kimono.
"Hai, genryusai. It is indeed unheard of, but I believe in her. Hitsugaya is being awfully kind in letting her do this. I'm surprised, to be honest."
Yamamoto gurgled. "Indeed, I am too. He must know this has a high level of importance. We are able to kill two birds with one stone, so to speak. I still have my doubts, of course."
"Do not worry genryusai." Byakuya said, "It will be good for both of them."
Author's Note: Well, there you have it…my first chapter. I attempted to keep Hitsugaya in character, and it was indeed very hard, but the next chapters will be even more of a challenge, but to…other things. :3 I hope you enjoyed it, and please review. Constructive criticisms are nice, but no flames. That does not help me improve.
Look out for the next chapter sometime in the kinda near future! I thank you in advance for the reviews!
Oh, and some things to know (most know these, but some do not. I am taking Japanese, so these are correct):
"Ohayoo gozaimasu"- means good morning, but towards someone older to you; respectful
"Ohayoo"- good morning to friends, family or someone lower than you
"Hai"- yes
"Genryusai"- Commander-captain
"Taicho" – captain
"Fukutaicho"- lieutenant or vice-captain
EvilMoose