Here he paused, expression drowned in regret. I had seen such anguish on his features only once before, the night the Enchantress had sent me away.
I reached a hand out, as if I could smooth the pain away. He took it with both hands, bringing it to his forehead. He took a deep, shuddering breath, eyes closed as he composed himself. After a minuet he looked up, a pained smile on his lips.
"Thanks for listening." He said quietly, kissing my knuckles before letting go. "From there I quieted down. I learned that if the need was not great, the spell not complicated, I could still work magic without great consequence. I bounced from kingdom to kingdom as I had before, only now I took commissions and was carful about what I handled. Every now and then I would help my sister with her own projects of good. That was why I worked for Prince Adam. Why I came to get you."
"I understand." I said, voice low. "But, why did you take me away?"
"At the time it was a whim. A thought that ran through my head. Here was a girl who needed someone. What if that someone was me? What if, by helping her, I could atone for my past mistakes."
I looked down, swallowing. Was that all I was to him? I had suspected, when I had overheard them talking, but still – I had hoped I was more.
"You look just as you did that day I picked you up from your fathers estate."
He was watching me, looking as if he might cry.
"That day," he continued, "that day I remember thinking that you were beautiful, beautiful and hopeless. As I traveled with you, before we ran away, I became addicted to your expression. That first day you cried silently, coldly. And then you did not cry again. You were always so carful, managing your expression. The picture of a perfect lady, cordial and pleasant to those you traveled with. But not to me. To me you were cold. And," he looked at me sideways, looking like he might laugh at his own pitifulness. "And I loved you for that. I did not wish to fawned on, nor did I want to be treated to societal politeness. I wanted to be punished, and your indifference was the perfect punishment."
This time he did laugh out loud, obviously feeling lighter.
"And you sat there, completely unaware of your affect on me. After a while, hypocrite that I am, I could stand your indifference no longer. So I tried to get you to talk to me, and after awhile, well, you know. I succeeded. You know what happened after that."
"Up until your sister." I confirmed. "But what does any of this have to do with your bruised cheek."
"I'm missing a molar too."
"Are you trying to get my pity right now?"
"Maybe. No, never mind, I'm not. I deserved it."
"What? Did you go find the dwarves to apologize and help out and they weren't happy to see you? Or maybe you went to go help out those fairies you cursed and they gave you a wallop."
"Well," Justin said slowly, "Yes, actually. Not the wallop part, but the rest. That's not how I got the bruise though."
I went quiet, ready to listen again. He had gone to apologize?
He saw me waiting for an explanation and touched his cheek again, fingering the mark. "Well, after I went to apologize and close my debts, I decided to try and find you again."
"Wait," I stopped him, "What do you mean pay back your debts?"
"Well, first I went to the dwarves. They, err, remembered me to say the least. Their princess called them off me when she saw what was happening though. I explained myself and offered any services I was capable of providing as atonement. I spent half a year there, the dwarves making me do hard labor as I helped the princess and prince plan for the merging of the kingdoms. I destroyed the mirror as well, it was not the object I had hoped to make. It wasn't enough, it wasn't my largest transgression. My magic remained tainted and broken. So I returned to the evil fairy for whom I had cast the spell weakening the others but I found out she had already been killed. Her purpose had already been completed and defeated, the babe she had hoped to take protection away from already grown-"
"Hold it." I interjected. He looked at me, sighing. "What do you mean babe? As in baby? And fully grown? How old are you?"
He thought for a moment. "Physically? Not much older than you. Probably about twenty-two or three."
"What do you mean physically?" Had I fallen for an old man?
"It's, kinda hard to describe honestly. We Fatalore's have a little bit of fairy blood in our genes. It makes time a little wonky, to say the least. Birthday's are practically non-existent because of it. For now, just know that my physical age is probably my real age, or as close to a real age as I'm going to get anyway."
"Wait, you don't celebrate birthday's? That's so sad. I'll be sure to hold one for you every year now."
He smiled. "That's sweet, but it's not that bad. We often celebrate our un-birthdays."
"Un-birthdays?"
"I love that you're interested in my life but I thought you wanted to-"
"Know about that bruise." I finished. "Sorry, I'll be quiet now."
"Well I was gonna say know about how my magic came back, but yeah. I'll get to the bruise as well."
I scooted forward, ready to listen.
"So when I found the fairy's it turned out that my magic had already faded and they could use their magic completely unincumbered. My magic had already been tainted when I cast the spell, that with the little bit of fairy blood in my veins allowed them to regain their powers once the evil fairy had been defeated. Now it was just a matter of my intentions. I had intentionally used my magic to weaken them, I would need their blessing to regain mine, proof that I was worthy of my magic once more. Worthy of goodness once more. That took me six months as well."
He smiled, eyes far away, reminiscing in the recent past.
"The first fairy gave me her blessing easily, the fact that I was even there, begging for forgiveness, proof enough that my intentions were good. I will say, with the highest respect for the fairy, that the moment her blessing touched me I fell before her crying and kissing her skirts. She was a sweetness I had not felt in a long while. I devoted myself to her for the first two months. Then the second fairy caved, seeing my devotion to the first. She gave me her blessing. Two months later the last of the fairies, a stubborn but well-meaning lady – younger than the others – gave me her blessing as well. I was remiss to part with them but, Augustina, I had something, someone I wished for more than even my own magic. I told them my selfishness and they laughed at me, shooing me off."
My letters were well done and over by this time. He took my hands and covered them with his own.
"Augustina, I then came here to find you."
AUTHORS NOTE: So, I just realized that it took me like three chapters to actually answer the question "how did you get that bruise?" I blame it on Justin liking to talk too much. It's not at all like I'm the writer and am responsible for my characters actions or anything... So yeah, sorry it takes a while to get to the point, but we will get there! The action will pick up again soon as well. Still, I hope you all enjoyed learning Justin's backstory at least a little, because it was a ton of fun to write. Thanks so much for reading!
(The reason for the bruise is told next chapter). :)