"Aqua, stop sulking. It's unbecoming of you." Wolbach requested with a small smile, catching her fellow goddess' attention as she slid her a mug of fresh tea. "Kazuma said his job with Luna would take the rest of the day. He should be home any minute now, there's no need to worry."
"The last Kazuma went out alone, he almost got mauled to death by the Black Fang," Aqua glumly pointed out. "And when I take my eyes off of him for even just a second, he goes and gets kidnapped. So I can't help it if I'm worried about him right now..."
"I understand your concerns, Aqua, but have some faith in your fearless leader." Wolbach retorted, her obvious sarcasm drawing out a light smirk from the water goddess. "The others have already headed off to bed. While I can't make you stop waiting here of all places, I would recommend getting some rest."
The water goddess shifted her eyes down at the countertop, mulling over the idea of sleep in her head. While she originally intended to stay up all night to see Kazuma's safe return home, she had to admit, she was gradually getting more and more tired (if the ever increasing yawns were anything to go by). Sighing in defeat, Aqua stood up from her chair and ran her hand through her wrangled blue hair.
"Alright, I guess it would be good for me to be well-rested...But promise you'll wake me up as soon as Kazzy gets home safe and sound! I know demons and the like tend to stay up late anyway, so don't give me any excuses, missy!"
Wolbach snorted at that, rolling her eyes as she took a sip of her own tea while she prepared a retort in her mind. Before she could put it to use, however, the familiar sound of the front door opening rang out from the nearby hallway, catching both goddess' attention.
Seeing that certain "sheen" in Aqua's eyes, Wolbach anticipated her holy cohort's mad dash to the front doors, and chuckled lightly to herself when she did just that. "The little one was right," she said to herself in amusement. "That girl really is clingy for the boy."
Aqua's excited greeting died on her lips, however, as she entered the main hallway and spotted not only her boyfriend, but three unexpected guests that she didn't recognize. Kazuma met her gaze, and offered a tired chuckle and wave as he rubbed his neck awkwardly.
"Er, hey Aqua. You mind gathering up the others? We have a bit of a situation we need to discuss." He requested simply, before glancing back at Iris with a far less pleasant tone. "Apologies for the state of my residence, your highness. Wasn't expecting company."
"Speak ill of the princess once more and I will see to it that it shall be the sorriest day of your short life!" barked one of the bodyguards in white robes. Their hoods were down and Aqua could tell they were both nobles like Darkness, the blue eyes and blonde hair being dead giveaways. The water goddess was about to give the one who threatened her man (the one with side swept bangs) a piece of her mind when a little girl beat her to it.
"Claire, there's no need for that. We're guests, unexpected ones at that. Kazuma has a right to be less than enthused." Iris chastised, before turning her gaze to Aqua and offering a polite smile and nod. "Greetings. I assume you to be Aqua, the arch priest of Kazuma's party. I've heard quite a bit about your escapades, ma'am."
It took her a few seconds to connect the dots, but once she did, Aqua pointed at the small girl and said, "Belzerg Stylish Sword Iris, princess of this Kingdom, right? It's been a while and I want to make sure my facts are straight."
"You are correct, but just call me Iris. Please." The princess practically pleaded, slouching slightly in an undignified manner. "It's such a mouthful and I hate to repeat it. Speaking of which, we should probably assemble the rest of your party. I'd hate to inconvenience you all more than required."
Nodding slowly, Aqua turned to her boyfriend, smiled briefly at his safe return, and gently placed her hands on his shoulders. "Kazuma, I know you just got back from a long, hard day at work, but could you be a sweetheart and wake the others up for me please? I'd like to have a private chat with our...'visitors' real quick. There won't be any trouble, I promise. Only want to ask them a few things."
"...I mean, sure. I'll be right back." Kazuma replied, electing to put his faith in his girlfriend (likely out of exhaustion) and heading further into the mansion to wake the rest of his party. Slightly confused, Iris and her retainers turned to Aqua expectantly, none quite sure of what she had planned.
"Alright, there's two things I want to get straight with you all," Aqua stated while crossing her arms, not in the mood for any more unexpected bullshit. "One: keep your servants' lips under control. I won't tolerate any threats or rude remarks towards my boyfriend, royalty or no. Two: Kazuma has the right to refuse whatever offer you present to him, and I highly encourage you to respect his wishes. Are we understood?"
Claire visibly bristled at Aqua's demands while Rain merely flinched, surprised with the irritation in the secret goddess' tone. Iris, however, merely smiled and nodded once again, not half as bothered with the request as her bodyguards were.
"Crystal clear. I assure you that both I and my retainer will be nothing if not polite and courteous during our visit." She replied confidently, an almost playful shimmer passing her eyes. "Furthermore, I'm sure you'd be pleased to hear that I'm not here with an offer, merely good news. News I plan to share as soon as your party is assembled."
Aqua cocked an eyebrow at that, slowly shredding her annoyance in favor of curiosity. She was half tempted to prompt Iris for more details when the sound of shuffled footsteps drew her attention away from the nobles and back at her team, who were still in their pajamas save for Kazuma and herself.
"Mhm, what exactly have you dragged us out of bed for? I was starting to fall…" Megumin started to grumble, before noticing the princess and her guards, waking up slightly and gaping. "Wah...Dark, we got company!"
After having finished rubbing the sleep from out of her eyes, the crusader slowly recognized who exactly was at her doorstep and nearly had a heart attack once she realized she was improperly dressed. Quickly dropping a knee, Darkness bowed her head in legitimate shame as she stuttered, "B-B-B-Belzerg Stylish Sword Iris! Please, forgive us for our lack of conduct! I-I wasn't informed that we would be graced by Your Eminence!"
The rest of the party glanced at each other in uncertainty, silently debating on whether or not they should follow the crusader's lead. However, before they could do so, Iris hastily shook her head and spoke up, equally as surprised by this turn of events.
"It's quite alright, Ms. Dustiness Ford. This wasn't a scheduled visit, and I should expect no courtesy as such." She assured the crusader, who tentatively raised her head. "You may rise, and please, cease the formalities. I came here as a messenger, after all, not a princess."
Darkness faltered for a moment, clearly just as lost as the rest of her party members, though for vastly different reasons. However, she did eventually rise to her feet, though the tremendous blush lingered on her face long after, making Kazuma quietly resist the urge to remind the crusader of keeping her kinks in line before addressing Iris once more.
"Alright, well, the gang's all here," he said, conveniently leaving Wolbach out for the time being. No sense in causing a commotion over him harboring a former war criminal. "Care to catch them up on current events or was there another planned 'presentation' you had in mind? Say, more kidnappers? Robed weirdos? How about knock-out gas just for the hell of it?"
"Oh, come now, Kazuma. That isn't fair. I have you kidnapped once and it's suddenly an endless ammunition source for you, isn't it?" Iris retorted with her own brand of snark, almost earning a small smile from Kazuma in the process...almost. "And don't you have one more member you should call upon? A certain goddess of Wrath that is supposedly in your custody?"
Kazuma internally panicked at the sudden revelation that Iris already knew about Wolbach. However, he maintained his poker face he crafted through years of bottling his emotions and decided to play dumb. "I'm afraid you're mistaken, dear princess. The only 'goddess' I have in my party is the arch priest who likes to play pretend. Everyone is here and accounted for."
Politely ignoring Aqua's irate sputter, Iris just hummed and narrowed her eyes slightly, before lacing her hands together as her expression shifted to a relaxed smile. "Apologies for the confusion, then. All the same, you're quite right about getting to the point. As such, I shall do so now. Approximately a week ago, the Devil King and his remaining generals approached the capitol with the majority of their forces...and promptly surrendered to the jurisdiction of my Coalition."
Naturally, there was a noisy uproar of confusion, doubt, and ultimately shock amongst the three girls. The Devil King, evil incarnate, laying down his arms and surrendering just like that? It sounded so out of left field. Yet here was the princess herself, relaying the news of his surrender so calmly to them. It had to be true...right?
"You can't be serious! That's completely insane!" Megumin insisted, shocked beyond belief at the news. "The Devil King had an army thousands strong, and full use of the worst of the worst when it came to magic! Why the hell would he ever surrender?!"
"Well, try to think about it for a moment," Iris politely urged, determined to convince even the most obstinate member of Kazuma's party. "With only two of his eight generals left standing, an army stretched dangerously thin, souring trade deals with annexed cities, and a war that's been dragging on LONG before I was born...would you want to keep fighting? Or would you rather cut your losses and end this dispute in a more civil manner?"
"I will admit, your hypothesis has merit, my lady." Darkness remarked, cupping her own chin and humming in thought. "However, the question remains of why now? As you said, this war has been dragging on for years upon years, and the Devil King has previously never shown any such fatigue. What could have possibly changed?"
"I'm afraid I don't have a particularly strong answer for that," Iris admitted. "However, I like to think there was some part of that man deep down that recognized the futility and pointless bloodshed this conflict has caused. Of course, a false sense of security is always an option, but if that were the case, he would've done it when he delivered the message and while I was out in the open. That's not to say we're ruling out a surprise ambush entirely, however, I've decided to give him a chance to prove his sincerity by arranging a treaty-signing a week from today."
"Ok, this is all well and good, but I think it's time we confront the elephant in the room." Aqua interjected, leaning down and fixing Belzerg's princess with a firm glare. "Why exactly have you delivered this news in person? You could have ordered damn near anyone to come tell us, but you decided to come personally. Why?"
A very subtle growl escaped Claire's throat, one which did not go by undetected by the water goddess as she glared daggers at the woman. Sensing the tension quickly rising, Iris held up her hands and explained, "Why, it's very simple. I'm inviting you all to the signing of the peace treaty as special testimonials. That, and, well...if I may be honest, I'd also like to have you as emergency backup in the event that things don't go quite as intended."
"We do have one helluva track record when it comes to getting stuck in the Devil King's business, don't we?" Kazuma mused, the strangest look of unexpected certainty crossing his face as he nodded, seemingly to himself, before turning back to Iris. "While my team and I have to discuss this further, I'm in favor of obliging your request for us to show up."
"Thank you so much, Kazuma! This truly means a great deal to me!" Iris couldn't help but gush. "I'm well aware of your disinterest in Belzerg affairs, not to mention my admittedly underhanded persuasions, so just be aware that you still have the right to decline my invitation if you so wish. I do care for the personal liberties of my subjects, after all. I won't force you to do anything against your will."
"Thanks for the consideration. As I said, I do have to discuss this with my party members before I make a final decision. That said, I'll try to keep the negotiations fairly short." Kazuma assured Iris, before pausing and crouching down slightly to look Iris in the eye on her level. "And just so we're clear? If my party and I do make an appearance, we're doing it to tie up the loose ends, or rather make sure that they are tied by your coalition. I may not want to see people get hurt, but the Devil King and his cronies have put me and my friends through the goddamn wringer, so you should know that I'm really banking on them getting their just deserts."
The princess smiled knowingly and gave Kazuma a small thumbs up as she said, "I understand completely. As with the offer to join my coalition, I will leave the decision to attend the truce entirely up to you and your party. You have my word as a princess!"
"I'll certainly have to keep that in mind, won't I?" Kazuma remarked, mirroring the young girl's action before waving his hand dismissively. "Well, it's been an absolute treat, your highness, but since my party and I have much to discuss and I wouldn't want to keep you later than I have to, I think this is the part when we tragically part ways."
"Aw shucks!" Iris exclaimed dramatically while snapping her fingers in disappointment. "That's right, I have a kingdom to manage! Darn thing can't seem to take care of itself. Oh well, it is what it is. I'll leave you to talk it over with your team. All you have to do is not show up to the capitol a week from now and that'll be enough of an answer for me. With that, I wish you and everyone else a good night."
Kazuma and the girls echoed the sentiment back, and with that, the princess and her escorts opened the front door and slipped out into the night. As the door swung shut, Kazuma pinched the bridge of his nose and released a long, vaguely amused sigh/chuckle before turning to the girls and quirking an eyebrow expectantly.
"That could have gone a lot worse."
Not ten minutes later, after both Sena had returned from her late shift at the guild hall and assuring Wolbach that she was not under any scrutiny (at least on the princess' side), the full group assembled in the living room, stewing for a time as they each sipped freshly brewed coco, per Aqua's request.
"So, the old king is finally waving the white flag, eh?" Wolbach got to comment after waiting patiently for Sena to cool her jets after being told the news. "Never thought I'd see the day, even as an immortal being. I'd sooner anticipate the stars going out first before he would ever dare to surrender."
"Well, I'm not one to complain. It certainly makes our job a helluva lot easier." Kazuma remarked after a long sip, before casting Aqua a frightfully knowing and serious look. "However, it certainly does come with some...unexpected hurdles, doesn't it?"
"Oh yeah, that's right...you were supposed to defeat the Devil King so I could go home," Aqua partially muttered to herself. The goddess stared down for a moment into the murky depths of her coco, her thoughts swirling in her head like the warm beverage. What did this mean for her and everyone else going forward? Was there just no going back home for her anymore? And more importantly...would she even want to go back home after everything that's happened up until this point?
"Things have obviously gotten a lot more complicated on that front, yeah." Kazuma confirmed, bowing his head and scratching his neck, a bizarre sense of sobriety resonating in his tone. "I mean, by technicality, he's defeated and we sorta played a part in it...maybe? I guess you could always talk to Eris about the semantics, and uh...you know, the whole you returning to heaven thing."
Worried when Aqua had yet to look up from her coco, Kazuma was about to start rambling in a desperate attempt to reassure her when she suddenly gazed softly into his eyes and smiled. "Maybe. But even if that doesn't work out, I don't think I'll mind. I'd much rather stay here with you and the rest. Who knows, maybe if I'm lucky, Eris can set me up with vacation visits to Heaven. I'd still like to see my old home and friends every once and a while, y'know?"
A beat passed as the worry that had sunk into Kazuma's chest dissipated on the spot, a small and undeniably relieved smile rising on his face as he nodded, effectively put at ease with Aqua's assurance. "Yeah, that-that sounds nice. It obviously wouldn't be the same without you here, but you definitely earned some time off, o' goddess of mine."
Aqua was about to make a clever retort when she was suddenly interrupted by an unexpected hug from Megumin. The young mage had rushed over to embrace the water goddess and had buried her face in the crook of her neck. She soon mumbled in a strained voice, "T-thank you. Thank you for...for not wanting to leave us behind. Heh, uh, that was really cool of you, Aqua."
Aqua chuckled lightly, patting the young girl's head and returning the hug while Darkness strode over and laid a hand on the goddess' shoulder, offering her own smile. "It would truly be a shame to lose you after everything we've been through together. Thank you for electing to stay by our sides."
"Well of course it would be a shame without me here; it's ME we're talking about!" Aqua joked, earning her some small chuckles from the group. She quickly followed it up with a more serious tone, "That and, well...you guys are my family now. Don't get me wrong, I love my friends back home to pieces, but I don't think I could forgive myself if I left my family behind. That's why I'm perfectly happy staying here in the mortal realm if it means getting to be with you all!"
Across the room, Wolbach physically bit her tongue to keep herself from saying something insensitive and cruel, that being the stark and somber realization that everyone in that room aside from her or Aqua would die centuries before either goddess. Instead managing what she hoped to be a discreet cough, the goddess for wrath buried the sentiment deep down, not particularly keen on dwelling on it herself.
"So I guess nothing changes for us then, huh?" Kazuma asked out loud. "We'll just keep doing what we're doing and continue going on adventures, right? Either that or lounge around all day since we're rich and can afford to do that. I'm fine with either one.
"Well, I certainly can't see any reason why we couldn't indulge in a bit of both." Darkness remarked, a playful smile gracing her face as she held up her hands to accentuate her words. "We can kick back and relax when we desire to do so, but if we ever get the itch to go out and adventure, we do just that! Like you said, since we have a sufficient amount of eris, the only reason we'd need to go on an adventure is either boredom or personal reasons."
"While I don't mean to interrupt this truly riveting debate, I can't help but feel that the specifics of your collective retirement can wait for a moment." Wolbach interrupted, earning her the attention of all present in the room. "We have bigger fish to fry, specifically the Devil King and whether or not you lot are actually going to this treaty signing."
"Normally, I'd love to tell Wolbach to shove it, but I'm afraid she's right in this particular case." Sena chimed it, pointedly ignoring the sparse glare the goddess of wrath briefly cast her way. "You four need to sort whether or not you're actually going to oblige Princess Iris' request to attend this ceremony. Personally, I don't want to see any of you put in harm's ways, so...I'm going to have to advise you to steer clear."
"See?! Even this bumbling excuse of a prosecutor knows how poor of a choice it would be to attend that treaty signing!" Wolbach retorted, smirking at the immediate scoff and glare that was cast her way by Sena. "That's why I have to concur with her assessment; attending is a bad idea, period."
Kazuma stood up and waved his hands to dismiss the two women. "Guys, look, the way I see it? I feel like I'm at least owed to show up after more or less giving the middle finger to the kid's first offer. Besides, we made it this far by defeating most of the Devil King's generals, so we might as well get to see the big man himself as a sort of send off to our original mission."
The Japanese turned his head back towards his girlfriends and clarified, "That is, of course, assuming you three are all in favor?"
"Well...I agree that we should see this through, and if you have all of us with you, I think you'd be pretty safe, so...I vote that we go for it!" Aqua replied, her damn near infectious smile giving Kazuma no small amount of hope. "It'd be nice to see the Devil King and his asshole daughter finally get their just deserts, even if I'd prefer we were the ones dishing them out to the latter...especially after what she did to you…"
Kazuma actually blushed at Aqua's sheer will and commitment to protecting him like that. Shaking his head slightly, he said, "Alright, that makes two of us then. Megumin, how about you?"
"Hmm...I mean, I see where Aqua's coming from, and I don't disagree that it's safer if we're all together, but...Wolbach has a point." The Crimson Demon admitted, arms crossed and expression uncertain. "Like I said earlier, the Devil King has some of, if not, the strongest that Dark Magic has to offer at his very fingertips. If something goes wrong...I don't know if I'd be able to protect you, even with Explosion…"
Kazuma was close to teasing Megumin on how un-Crimson Demon like it was of her to hesitate, but quickly stopped himself. This was his and their lives they were putting on the line, and now wasn't exactly the best time to act so carefree about it. Plus, with all the times he's made fun of his own deaths, he knew better than to invoke their anger over something that hurt them on such an emotional level.
"Hey, I get it. I'm not gonna blame you for being nervous, considering none of us have ever gone against anything quite to the level of the Devil King himself." Kazuma replied, before taking Megumin's hand and giving it a firm squeeze. "But we've had the cards stacked against us before, and I wouldn't be here today without any of you, magic and all. I think that this is a one and done deal, and that we need to take it while we have the opportunity. I believe in you guys, so if anything does go wrong, I'm confident we can handle it in a breeze."
A fire was sparked within the Crimson Demon's heart, and she squeezed Kazuma's hand back as tightly as she could, even making him wince a little in the process. "You're right! After all the struggles and challenges we've overcome, we'd be lousy quitters if we chickened out here and now! As my clan's deadliest magic caster, you can safely count me in, babe!"
"There's the fire I know and love! I knew you had it in you!" Kazuma chuckled, earning himself a brief hug from Megumin in the process, before disengaging and turning to the crusader with an expectant smile. "Alright then, it's down to you, Dark. What's the verdict on your end?"
"I think you and I both know what my stance is on the matter," Darkness answered with a confident smirk as she placed a hand on his shoulder. "I've shielded you and everyone else from all the other generals, it's only fitting that I be there to protect you all from the king himself should things go awry. Oh, and fret not Kazuma, I shall keep my baser instincts at bay should such an event happen, just as promised~"
"Thank you for that, Darkness. I greatly appreciate your self control." Kazuma replied politely, before a sinister smirk played at his lips and shot the crusader a mischievous look. "I'll have to reward you for that later…"
Darkness managed to contain herself but couldn't help but shiver in pure delight, which Kazuma noticed and subsequently relished. There really was something about seeing an otherwise strong, level-headed woman squirm that excited him. Once again, he would have to gaze out his bedroom window later and contemplate his life decisions.
"Ugh, far too much information than I needed to know. I'm sure even Sena can agree with me on that front, yes?" Wolbach remarked with no small amount of disdain, before turning to gauge the former prosecutor's reaction...and noting the flustered look on her face and accompanying small trickle of blood. "Oh, you're all abhorrent! Am I the only woman in this household with a normal sex drive?!"
A short but lighthearted wave of laughter followed the goddess' of Wrath's desperate plea to the heavens, before the group decided to iron things out properly in the morning considering just how tired they all felt. As the party and housemates returned to their respective rooms for the night, Kazuma in particular slumped in his bed and released a long, tired sigh.
Next week is gonna be something else...but I meant what I said. We're ready. It's time to end this game, once and for all.