A/N: I wrestled with this for weeks. Why is it that when I finally get to the part I want to write, I can't do it? I really like romance, I just can't write it apparently. But I'm not giving up on it either. Blah.

Also, graduate school, here I come.

Cole's dreams were anything but restful, if they could even be called dreams. If they weren't dreams, then he was completely fucked...

He saw blood dripping from his fingertips… Corpses piled up at his feet. He could feel the power surging through him, using his body as a doorway… He couldn't control his own limbs. Cole felt like a puppet. Surely someone else was pulling his strings… He struck down enemy after enemy. He knew he was slaughtering men like ants, but he couldn't stop himself.

The worst part was how good it felt... like he was fulfilling his purpose, just like Kessler said. The snow storm was nothing, because absolutely nothing could stop him.

A female voice was shouting nearby, it sounded afraid...

Cole, come back, please!

But he still couldn't stop. The snow around his feet was red. Was snow supposed to be that color? It didn't seem very important though... What was important was destroying these people, these men in gas masks would all die by his hand.

The girl sounded like she was on the verge of tears now.

Cole, you're dying! Stop, please stop!

Someone was trying to get away, and Cole was not about to let that happen... The next thing he felt was bones cracking in his hands. He kept twisting until the screaming stopped, and then released the limp pile of flesh. His arms convulsed, but still he kept wandering through the blood red snow.

Please, please... the voice begged.

Finally, he couldn't go on… the energy rush was leaving him, his powers losing their intense grip on him. He sank to his knees, his lungs filling with blood…

But then he saw the angel, the voice. Her snowy white wings were stretched out behind her, blocking his view of the bodies. She looked worried for a moment, but then she knelt down by his side, folding her wings against her back.

It's okay, she whispered to him. I 'm here. I know you didn't mean to.

But what if I really am a weapon like he said? Cole responded weakly, blood oozing from between his teeth.

The angel reached out to touch his hand. For once, she was actually able to make contact with his skin. The angel's touch felt human. His powers couldn't harm her… Finally, he'd found one person he could relax around.

That's not who you are, she said gently.

Then she faded, leaving Cole alone with his pain.

Stay with me, please… Cole begged. But she didn't return to him.

He wanted to find her, he needed her... He had to tell her how happy he was that he wasn't alone when she was around. He couldn't let drowning in his own blood stop him.

Cole stumbled into the fog, hoping to see her face... Blood dripped from his mouth, dribbling down his chin and neck.

How long would he have to search? How long did he have until he was dead? If he even could die... but then what was his fate? Did he have a choice anymore?

I shouldn't be alive. This is wrong, all wrong...

There was a dim white figure out there in the snow, but it wasn't his angel. Cole could see the twisted smile on the man's face. Kessler spread his arms, his metallic limb reflecting the light from a street lamp.

"So, Mr. MacGrath... this is all going rather well, don't you think?" his voice echoed from everywhere just like Shane's did...

Cole blinked, and he was gone.

When Cole's mind finally ground back into action, the only sensation he could feel was a low vibration in his chest, like the earth was humming. His mouth tasted like copper. He knew he was lying on his back, but when he opened his eyes all he saw was the underside of a tarp. His feet were warm...

Cole rolled over on his side and was immediately nauseous. He caught a glimpse of what looked like something metal before he started hacking and coughing like he was dying. He got down on his knees, spattering the ground with blood. When he felt like he couldn't cough anymore or he might hack up a lung, he simply sat there, letting the gore drip down his chin.

He could feel his arms shaking as he looked around. He was in the substation, which explained the low humming. A makeshift tent made out of a tarp was stretched over his head, and a fire contained in a ring of bricks burned at his feet. The area he'd been lying in had been cleared of snow.

How the hell did I get here? Did I make this stuff?

Cole's stomach squirmed uncomfortably. The ground around him looked like a murder scene. There was blood spatter everywhere, including all down the front of his shirt. It looked like he'd been puking blood on himself for days.

No, there was no way he'd done all this... that could only mean...

"Sam?" Cole choked, wiping his mouth with his coat sleeve. No, Shane... There was no Sam. There was only Shannon Hunter.

"Shane," he croaked, correcting himself.

A breeze brushed his cheek.

"Hmm?" came a soft voice in the air. "You okay? Feeling better?"

Cole's brain felt like mush. His mouth tasted even worse now than it had a few minutes ago. He definitely was not feeling better, and he had a million questions he wanted to ask. The only problem was that he felt like he could barely form a sentence, but he tried anyway.

"What... what happened?" he managed after a moment. Brilliant. He could string two words together.

Cole fumbled with the zipper of his coat, hoping to cover up the nasty bloody, gunk all down the front of his shirt. But his fine motor skills apparently weren't working because he couldn't get a grip on the tiny piece of metal, so he gave up.

A vision flashed in front of his eyes, flickering like the picture on an old, badly tuned TV set. A tiny, winged girl with long silver hair was sitting next to him, looking at him with concern.

Please tell me what I saw wasn't real.

"Don't worry about it," the angel said gently.

"Fuck," Cole groaned. Denial was the clincher.

All the things he saw in his dreams had really happened. Shane must have seen everything, so she knew...

He was something worse than a freak... he was a monster. He remembered the feeling of bones cracking in his hands, and blood dripping from his fingertips... He glanced at his palms. They were stained red, so that proved it.

Okay, so he was a monster. Done deal. Think about that later. But his friend was still alive, in a manner of speaking... He could still save her from Kessler. He just had to think of a new plan.

"Hey, I said don't worry about it," the angel insisted.

"But he was right," Cole growled, clenching his bloody hands. "I... I can't..."

It controlled me. Whatever this is, it used me like I was nothing but a meat puppet.

He shook his head. Had it really controlled him? Or had he always been doing exactly what his powers wanted him to do? Even when he'd wanted to push it away, it had still resurfaced... and he'd still been a killer.

Dim sparks danced along his palms. He clenched his fists to make them go away. He didn't want to see his power right now. They made him into this monster...

Stop, stop, stop. Stop thinking about it.

He stared hungrily at the vision of his friend. So close, but a world away. He understood the truth now. That explosion fucked her up the same way it had fucked him up... Was she having the same problems as he was?

The sky was still a slate gray... snowflakes were falling gently from the clouds. They drifted right through his winged friend like she was nothing, nothing but a figment of his imagination. Actually, this close... the wings weren't so much feathery as they were hazy, as if they were composed of dozens of tiny tendrils of smoke in the shape of feathers... did angels normally have smoky wings?

He needed to hear her say it. This girl had lied to him, made him think he was crazy, saved his life... and he'd tried to save her life. So he asked his same old question, the one that she had so far refused to answer honestly.

"What are you?"

The angel fidgeted, twiddling her thumbs. Her silver hair fell in her face, blocking it from view. He wished she wasn't still wearing that torn outfit from the day she died... it just reminded him of what a fuck up he was.

But you're real too, aren't you? I didn't really kill you... And now that I know that you have a body sometimes... will you still stay with me like you wanted?

"I don't know," she admitted. She stared him down with those big blue eyes, the same eyes that had haunted his dreams. "I didn't want you to know just yet, but... the best I can figure is that I'm like you. Kind of."

You have powers like I do. That's why you're not dead.

Cole's heart was going a mile a minute. He should have been angry at Shane for purposely lying to him about what she was, but he couldn't muster up the energy. She was still his only friend, and the only person in this whole city who cared about what happened to him.

"I'm... I'm sorry," Cole wheezed through his sore throat. He watched as she scooted closer to him. "For what I said the other day..."

"Cole, you had every right to be mad."

The angel's wings shuddered like she wasn't sure what to do with them. Cole just couldn't be upset with her...

"I'm not mad," Cole murmured through his torn lips. Shane graced him with a small smile.

"I was really worried about you," she said softly. "Those people must have shot you over a dozen times."

That explained why his back felt like an elephant had sat on it. He supposed the only reason he wasn't dead was because of his healing powers... His powers must have fixed his lungs, except his lungs had still been full of blood so he'd been coughing it up. Gross.

"Did you bring me here?" Cole asked, wondering how many times it was now that she'd saved him.

"No, you followed me."

"I followed you?"

"You followed my voice. I'd hoped this would be a good place for you to recover."

"Oh," Cole said, watching as his friend leaned towards him, staring him in the face like she was waiting for something to happen. Cole just stared right back.

It was a while before either of them said anything. Cole was still trying to process everything that he'd learned. Not only that, but he could feel the energy from the substation slowly trickling into him, stitching him back together from the inside out. If he was a slave to his power, at least it was keeping him alive.

But why hadn't Kessler come for them? He'd just been lying here, helpless, drowning in his own blood... Was Kessler just waiting for Shane to show herself again? But she must have been human for a little while to make this tent. So what the hell was going on, then?

"Why did you want to help me at all?" Cole asked, even though it almost seemed silly to ask now. She'd already said she remembered him from when he'd hit her with his bike. And he remembered thinking she was beautiful.

Shane fidgeted some more, smiling shyly at him.

"You were cute," she said, grinning and fluttering her wings. Cole very nearly smiled back at the absurdity of this situation. He was sitting here covered in blood after just massacring a whole group of people with an angel telling him he was cute.

"Funny," Cole managed after a moment.

The angel smiled even wider. Those blue eyes were still so goddamn bright. Whether human or angel, he still felt like Shane could see too much this close to him.

"And true," Shane said, winking one of those blue eyes at him. She finally broke eye contact with him and looked down at her thin fingers. "But... I guess there were a lot of reasons. I remembered you, of course, but then... I saw you heal that kid."

She looked back up. It was hard to tell, but it looked like tears were glittering in the corners of her eyes.

"Why would you be so kind if you were nothing but a killer? Why heal that child? Why show restraint when the mob attacked you? Why try and comfort me that day we met, when I was just some girl you barely knew?" she said plaintively.

Cole swallowed hard, which hurt like hell. He tried to clear his throat instead, but that hurt too. But the pain was good... he needed something to distract him so he didn't start blubbering too. He had never been much of a crier, even as a kid, but considering everything that had happened to him since he'd unknowingly delivered a bomb... it was all hitting him hard right now.

He wanted to tell Shane to run, to go... but he felt sure that if she could have, she would have by now. Something was keeping her here. Which meant that they were both still trapped here, like rats in a maze... Trapped in what had now become Kessler's maze of horrors. He could terrorize them however he wanted, broadcast his voice all over town to taunt them, maybe send more Reapers in their direction...

Okay Cole, time to wake the fuck up and think of a new way out of here. You owe her that much now... She's your friend, just like she said.

Shane was frowning at him, impatiently wiping away her own invisible tears.

"You okay?" she asked him. She was close enough now that she was able to reach out and let a hand rest on his leg. Cole's heart skipped a beat. He could actually sense that touch.

And stop falling in love while you're at it.

"Great," Cole croaked. He moved his hand until it was right where hers was. Her hand was so small, it rested inside his. But where their hands met... he could feel his skin tingling. "So... could we just pick up where we left off the other day?"

"Sure," the angel said, patting his knee. Then the image faded... leaving him staring at a blank metal sheet. But he could still feel her hand on his knee. "But can I go first?"

"Okay."

"Well," the air in front of him began, "I need to tell you... that guy who wants me dead may not be the worst of our problems. We, um, kind of need to leave this city soon. According to that guy who attacked me yesterday, the military is going to blow this place up in a week."

She said all this really fast, like she thought that if she got it all out quickly it would come as less of a shock. But it didn't work, because Cole nearly choked on his own saliva.

"What? You can't be serious!"

"Yeah," Shane's voice continued. "That's what the guy who drugged me said, anyway... a guy who I'm guessing is working for that scary guy with the white coat and the metal hand..."

"Kessler," Cole snarled. He wished he could still see her... "Don't worry, I'll get us out of here if it kills me."

There was that laugh, that soft laugh in the air.

"You know, I have tried very hard to keep you alive, Mr. MacGrath... getting yourself killed would make all that effort seem kind of pointless."

Cole laughed uneasily. I don't even know if I can die. I almost wish I could, then maybe I could avoid this fucked up destiny. But...damn it, I don't want to leave you alone.

He knew it was true, too... whatever Shane was, when she was human she could obviously still be hurt, still be incapacitated... She admitted to him that someone had drugged her, which must have been why he found her on the ground in the snow. He had to protect her until he thought of a new plan, and fast... If the military was really planning on bombing the city, they had to get out now.

A cold wind blew in through the substation. Their little fire flickered.

Cole remembered the images that Kessler had planted in his mind... He saw himself standing atop a pile of blood soaked corpses, nothing but fire and ash for miles. He could practically feel it now, that future. It was pressing in on him, pulling him in like a giant black hole. It was like the more he tried to fight it and escape from it, the closer it got.

"Cole?" Shane's voice echoed in his mind. His arm tingled, and he knew she was touching him.

"Hmm?" Cole said vaguely, still staring at the blank metal sheet. His mind was still stuck on those visions... if the military was going to destroy this city, that meant Cole couldn't be the one responsible... the visions were wrong.

Unless... unless it was another city he saw in those visions?

You are a weapon, Cole MacGrath... That was what Kessler said.

How many cities could I be capable of destroying? He was checking on my progress... He created me, and now he's testing me.

"Well, if you're feeling better, we should probably get out of here before anybody finds us," the voice said in his ear, derailing his train of thought.

Cole nodded and got unsteadily to his feet. He still didn't feel very well, but she was right, they needed to get away from this open space and somewhere more hidden. He glared at the hazy sky, still thinking of Kessler.

You can't make me do what you want. You can make me into a freak, but that's all you're getting out of me. And there's no way in hell I'm going to let you hurt Shannon.

"What are you thinking?"

Cole sighed as he stomped out their little fire.

"And we're back to me talking to myself... this is all your fault, you know," Cole grumbled, stumbling out into the street. "If we do get out of here, I'm going to be locked up in the psych ward."

"I'll come visit you."

"Awesome, I can't wait," Cole said sarcastically. "So where are we going?"

"Well, we can go back to my place and get you some food, you look half dead..."

"Alright," Cole said, trying once again to zip up his coat. It was cold away from their tiny fire. He glanced around to try and orient himself, then trudged on through the snow. "By the way... thanks for, well... everything."

"No problem."

All the way down the street, Cole felt a gentle pressure on the palm of his hand, and he didn't mind in the slightest.