A/N Many thanks for the reviews, they are always very much appreciated. Also thanks to piccolina789 fr the Beta as always.
Sara puffed out a weary sigh as she entered the break room. Fighting back a yawn, she sat down to concentrate on the paperwork for the case she was working on. She'd be glad when it was finally the end of shift.
She fidgeted on the chair, trying to get comfortable. Her back ached, and she was feeling a general sense of weariness. The baby was lying in an uncomfortable position and it was kicking hard enough to make her wince. She leaned back against the chair as she rubbed the spot until the baby moved again.
Grissom entered the break room and Sara quickly moved toward the table, hiding her bump as she resumed staring at the paperwork.
Grissom, unaware of Sara's discomfort as he helped himself to some coffee, turned to face her as he took a grateful sip.
Grissom bit his bottom lip thoughtfully as he continued to watch Sara. Now almost halfway through her fifth month of pregnancy, Sara was glowing. She'd always been slender, but as was to be expected, as the pregnancy progressed she'd gained a little more weight, but not much. It suited her.
"Honey…" he began, and then paused.
Sara looked up from her paperwork with a smile that didn't quite reach her eyes.
"How's the case coming along?" Grissom asked, instead of saying what was really on his mind.
"It shouldn't take much longer," Sara replied, turning her attention back to the paperwork. "Just a few loose ends to tie up and it's case closed."
Grissom watched her, biting his lip in thought as he debated if he should tell her what was on his mind when his pager beeped, and he quickly put his cup down.
"That's Henry with my tox results. I heard the guys mention going to IHOP for breakfast again," he informed her as he left the break room. "I'll meet you outside my office at the end of shift."
Sara looked up briefly from her paperwork as she watched him disappear down the corridor, not sure why she suddenly felt uncomfortable with the idea of going to breakfast. Another yawn escaped her. All she really wanted was to go home, grab a shower and some sleep.
When Grissom and Sara returned home from breakfast, the minute the front door of their townhouse was closed, Grissom gathered Sara in an embrace and kissed her deeply, unable to wait another second to touch her.
They had worked doubles for most of the week, and on top of that, Nick had been out sick, so it had turned out to be a busy week for all of them. It had come with a huge sense of relief for all them that last night had turned out to be an easy shift.
Sara returned the kiss, but pulled away as Grissom deepened the kiss, his exploring hands making his intentions obvious.
"I'm sorry, Gil, but I'm really tired," Sara replied, stifling a yawn. "A shower and sleep are all I can manage right now."
She broke away from his embrace and he leaned against the door, silently watching her making her way upstairs with hurt in his eyes. He didn't like the thoughts that were suddenly filling his head.
Trying to push his sudden doubts aside, he placed the car keys and his cell phone on the breakfast island before following her upstairs, hoping that he could hide the sudden hurt her rejection had caused.
The shower was running when he entered the bedroom. He shrugged out of his jacket and tossed it aside. With a sigh, he sat on the bed and toed off his shoes and socks. Just as he was about to unbutton his shirt, his cell phone rang from the kitchen.
With a tired sigh, he closed his eyes and hung his head, hoping that this call wouldn't turn into another double shift.
Sara stared at her reflection in the full-length mirror of the bedroom. Her damp hair framed her pale face, limply.
Still watching her reflection with a critical eye, she turned sideways, her hands on her expanding bump. A tired sigh escaped her parted lips and she felt tears prick her eyes.
Dammed hormones! she thought as she wiped the tears away. Lately it seemed that everything seemed to make her an emotional wreck. She faced the mirror again as the tears continued to fall.
She was still trying to mentally get her head around how fast her body was physically changing, and in just a few short months their baby would be here. Doubts filled her mind once more as she wondered if she'd be a better mother than her own had been to her.
Grissom entered the bedroom, startling her from her reverie. She quickly hid her bump and nakedness with the bath towel, hating the feeling of being exposed and unattractive.
Gathering her clothes in a pile, she hurried to the bathroom and locked the door behind her. She left a stunned Grissom standing alone in the bedroom.
"Sara? Honey?"
Grissom's voice came from behind the closed door, sounding concerned. Despite knowing the door was locked, he tried anyway. He leaned his head against the door, and placed a hand flat against the door. "Honey, please open the door," he coaxed. "I want to help with whatever is bothering you."
"I'm okay," Sara lied, her voice muffled as she tried to control her spiraling emotions. "It's just hormones making me feel crazy. I'll be out in a minute."
Attempting to pull herself together, Sara pulled on her sleep tank top and plaid pyjama bottoms. She caught a glance of herself in the bathroom mirror, thinking how unflattering and unattractive she looked, and the tears fell harder.
They hadn't been intimate for the last few weeks, though that had solely been through her choice. As her insecurities over her changing body shape had increased, she'd not pursued him. Deep within her, she knew that Grissom didn't see her as she saw herself now, if anything, he desired her even more, but she couldn't seem to keep the thoughts out of her head.
Early the next morning, near the end of shift, a few members of the team were gathered in the briefing room, reviewing the evidence they had on a case they were all working on.
"I'm still waiting on fingerprints off the fishing spear," Greg informed Grissom, who was sitting at the head of the table, an open file in front of him.
Grissom nodded.
"As soon as you hear anything from Mandy, let me know. The footprint found at the scene is a size 12 and made from a Dr. Marten work boot."
Through the exchange of evidence, Sara was quiet, concentrating on the paperwork in front of her and the words of her co-workers.
"Blood at the scene confirms multiple donors," Catherine contributed "One was from the vic, Mark Stone, the other from an unknown female. Still waiting for the results from the cabin area."
The review continued for a few minutes more before Grissom leaned back in his chair and removed his glasses. He took a hesitant breath.
"Before you all go, I just want to tell you that for the next two weeks, I'll be leaving Catherine in charge," he said. "I've been called unexpectedly to LA for a consult."
The moment he finished speaking, Sara rose from her chair, took her file with her and left the break room.
Grissom bowed his head with a sigh, his lips in a tight line and his gaze locked on the table. A muscle twitched in his cheek. Everyone looked at each other, feeling uncomfortable. Everyone but Catherine made an excuse and left the room, leaving Grissom alone with his friend.
Catherine watched as Grissom struggled to decide if he should follow Sara or not. It had only taken her about two minutes into shift the previous night to sense the tension between them. She hadn't seen them interact much over the next eight hours, but at the briefing, Sara sat three chairs away from the father of her child.
Sensing Grissom's discomfort, Catherine put her hand on his arm, hoping that she could smooth things over. She knew it wasn't like Sara to storm out of a room and knew that there had to be more to it.
"I take it Sara isn't too happy about your trip to LA, or is there more to it than that?"
Catherine patted his arm, and smiled reassuringly, when Grissom didn't answer.
"I'm going out on a limb here and say its perhaps a little of both," she said. "She's going through a lot of changes right now, both physically and emotionally. Her hormones all are over the place. It's like being on a roller coaster. You're on a high one-minute, the next you're on a low. Sometimes, they can make you feel undesirable and unattractive… she just needs a little reassurance."
"I have work to do," Grissom responded, rising from his chair and gathering up his files The last place he wanted to discuss his relationship with Sara was the briefing room.
"What time is your flight?" Catherine asked, following Grissom as he headed to his office.
"7:30 a.m., why?"
"Because that gives you time to talk to Sara. I'll drop you off at McCarran. It saves you from getting a taxi."
Two hours later, as Catherine was coming back from the A/V lab, the door to Grissom's office was partly ajar. He was sitting at his desk, deep in thought. His forehead was resting on his hand, his glasses dangled between his fingers.
Alone and unobserved, he didn't have to hide how he was really feeling. The slump of his broad shoulders and the downward turn of his mouth spoke volumes to Catherine. In his own way, Grissom was struggling with with the thought of leaving Sara, especially with the way she was feeling right now.
She took a step towards his office, then hesitated as she had second thoughts. He'd already heard her pep talk and had retreated to his office. There wasn't much else she could say that he would take to heart.
Retracing her steps, she went in search of Sara. Catherine caught up with the younger woman coming from the trace lab. She quickly grabbed Sara's arm and guided her into the layout room.
"Cath, what are you doing?" Sara gasped, doing her best to hide her bump with the file, a familiar gesture over the previous weeks that Catherine didn't miss.
With clarity, everything slipped into place in Catherine's mind.
"I know this is none of my business, but let me finish before you jump down my throat," Catherine started. "You don't need me to tell you that Gil thinks the world of you. And I do understand that there are times when pregnancy can be a big adjustment, with the changes your undergoing and hormones putting you on a roller coaster of emotions. But trust me, it's not going to last forever. Think of the incredible miracle your body is making. Be proud that you're carrying his baby and you're his lady. I know you're going to miss him, and so does he. He's struggling with this, just like you. Do you really want the last few hours you have together to be marred like this? I'm taking him to the airport in half an hour, if you decide you want to come along."
"Catherine, I…" Sara began, then closed her mouth, unable to get the words out.
Catherine put her arm around Sara's shoulders in a sisterly hug.
"I know two weeks seems like a lifetime right now. It will go by fast and you have us to help you through it," Catherine reassured. "Okay?"
She gave Sara's shoulder a reassuring squeeze and smiled when Sara sighed and gave a determined nod.
"That's my girl!"
Catherine was just about to pull out of the parking lot, Grissom in tow, when she spotted Sara in the rear-view mirror.
"You just made it!" Catherine smiled as Sara eased herself into the backseat of the Denali beside Grissom.
Catherine turned out on the road and began the short trip to McCarran. In the back seat, Sara reached out and entwined her fingers with Grissom's.
"I'm sorry I've been so emotional lately," she whispered.
Grissom squeezed her hand reassuringly.
"Honey, you're having our baby," he said, placing his hand on her bump and feeling a strong kick underneath his hand. His smile was proud. "You're allowed to be emotional whenever you want."
They settled into a somewhat comfortable silence as Catherine navigated the traffic around the airport. Once Grissom's luggage was checked in, he turned to face Sara.
"So this is it," Sara said. "You're really going."
Grissom swallowed as he stared into her eyes. He wanted to say so much, but the words kept eluding him. He remembered what Catherine had said about Sara needing reassurance, so he seized on the first thought that came to mind.
"If this consult wasn't so important, I wouldn't be going," he whispered. "I'm going to miss you."
He closed the space between them and hugged her to him.
"I'll miss you both. I'll call you once I reach the hotel," he promised.
He gave her one last squeeze before picking up his briefcase. He leaned in for one last light kiss on the cheek.
"We'll take care of her for you," Catherine promised him as she too hugged him goodbye.
Grissom began to make his way toward the gate, but he hadn't gotten too far before he heard Sara shout his name. He turned quickly and as she embraced him, he dropped his briefcase as his arms wrapped around her tightly, their lips meeting in a fiery kiss.
He poured everything he could into the kiss, trying to convey how much he loved her, desired her… and how much he'd miss her.
His lips moved to that spot behind her ear that made her shiver. Catherine's words once again echoed in his mind with sudden epiphany. Breaking the kiss, his lips brushed against her ear.
"It'll always be you. I love you, honey," he whispered huskily before tearing himself away without a backward glance, knowing that if he did, it would be his undoing.