Aaaaaahhhhh how has it been nearly two weeks since I last uploaded I swear it was like two days ago time is going so quickly
also sorry this is a little on the shorter side but quality not quantity? Hahahaha I'll show myself out...
also also thanks for the input haha I'd forgotten about the whole Lady Wifi thing wih Adrien and his ring. SO IT WORKS IN THE END HAHA
anyway enjoy!
Adrien Agreste awoke with his stomach growling.
Of course, he thought absently, I never got around to eating last night.
Memories of the previous day flashed through his mind, from the adventuring to the dressmaking to the akuma and after.
Nightmare had seriously scared him, not that he was ever going to admit it.
An akuma had finally pried his miraculous from his fingers, literally.
Absently, he pressed his hands together protectively over the white ring.
Plagg from next to him let out a small snore.
Adrien smiled; of course cats such as he could sleep like the devil himself.
Even Plagg had been more helpful to her than he.
He shook his head slightly to clear it, to shove away the vicious thought. He wrenched his mind back to the clear morning, with the easier prospects ahead.
The ball was that night!
And even though he was having the time of his life watching Marinette construct a beautiful dress from scratch, he was doubly excited to see the finished product.
He may even have competition as her number one fan by his father!
Pere's going to love it! He paused. Well, he better, or I'll, I'll, do my next interview in a leopard-print sweatshirt out of pure spite.
He sat up silently, looking over at Marinette's sleeping face with a small smile.
So she had managed to convince herself that "Chat Noir" and I just looked exactly the same? He rubbed some of the sleep from his eyes. I admit, there's some dedication involved in that. She'd even worked herself up to the point that she was able to look at me without seeing who I was.
Sure, he was a little hurt, but it was nothing compared to the sheer relief that she hadn't outright rejected him.
Well, she kind of had, but after a fashion she had accepted it.
But he wasn't going to let it get him down, no way! Not when there was so many other things to look forward to!
He wasn't going to listen to the quiet thought of just how vehemently she had rejected the very notion of him possibly being Chat Noir. He was going to crush all over that down to his feet and ignore it until it goes away!
A perfect plan!
Still the forced cheerfulness could not stop him slipping back into a melancholy, yet peaceful state.
He further scanned the room, realising that they had forgotten to shut the curtains the previous night as well.
Well, it's not like there's a point now.
As quietly as he could he arose from his bed, and snuck out the door and into the main room.
I can't believe how much things have changed since we boarded this ship. He looked around at Marinette's various parcels. He'd have to ask her to show him what the clothes look like, if they had time.
When I was me and Marinette and Ladybug were Marinette and Ladybug.
He flopped down onto the couch for a moment, before leaning forward to rifle through the goodies basket for something to eat. A moment's decision found him some chocolate covered almonds, and he carefully unwrapped the little box from its plastic packaging.
'Can you get me a cookie?' Came a voice and he jumped.
Tikki floated over, rubbing at one eye, before smiling at him. 'I think you've had a rough couple of days.'
'I think we all have.' He agreed.
Adrien's personality was easier to summon than Chat's right now.
'I'm surprised you're handling it so well, all things considered. You two fought off knowing your identities for a long time.' Tikki landed on the coffee table, and took Adrien's offered cookie.
Adrien eyed her, not for the first time of that trip.
Tikki was an interesting individual, it wasn't surprising that she was the flip side to Plagg.
Where Plagg was greedy, and slightly self-absorbed, Tikki was giving and empathetic.
However he had clearly seen that both kwamis equally held affinity for their holders, even if Plagg's was a little harder to immediately perceive.
Tikki eyed her cookie for a moment, before biting into it. 'They're still not as good as Marinette's.' She shrugged through a mouthful.
'That's fair.' Adrien nodded. He was well familiar with the talents of the Dupain-Cheng's bakery, and honestly if he didn't have his father and career to think about, he had seriously considered in the past turning Chat Noir towards the forces of evil and looting the place.
'So what are you going to do now?' She questioned after a long, quiet moment.
'I'm, not sure.' Adrien shook his head, clearing it of pastry-related petty theft. 'It's all so, weird.'
'"Weird" definitely would be a word for it.' Tikki agreed evenly. 'Well what do you think, now that you know Ladybug is Marinette? And that everything's in the clear?'
It took him a moment to try to come up with an answer, and nothing arose.
'I don't know.' Adrien said honestly. 'I mean, sure, I'm still in love with Ladybug, but now that Ladybug's a real person? Who's within my reach?' He shrugged, setting aside his snack on the table next to her. 'But let's face it, she's still totally out of my league.'
Tikki shook her head. 'I don't want this argument all over again.'
'"Again?" What do you mean "again"?' Adrien pressed. He hadn't spoken about this to the kwami before?
Tikki just let out a huge sigh, but did not elaborate. 'I notice that you've been much more familiar with Marinette of late though. Is this the whole "within my reach" business?' She changed the subject, eyeing him knowingly.
'You noticed?' He flushed, then raising his hands to hide it.
'Boy, Plagg noticed. And that's saying something.'
He hung his head. 'She probably hates me. It's too forward of me. I wasn't thinking properly. I should apologise to her.'
She sent a glare his way so sharp that he flinched, despite it coming from a creature smaller than his palm.
'What was that for?'
'She does not hate you. She doesn't even dislike you.' She sighed, rolling her eyes. 'What is it with teenagers?' She hung her head in her little hands.
'What's wrong with teenagers?' He questioned, frustrated on her lack of explanation.
She looked at him a long moment. 'I'll tell you when you're older.'
'But what does that mean?' Adrien groused, before catching her look. 'Right, right, never mind.' He took up the container of almonds again, then sat back against the couch, slightly more sourly than what he had intended.
However, his mind continued to wander.
'Does anyone else know who she is?' He asked, after a time. 'Like, her parents?' He paused. 'I don't think Alya knows, otherwise,' he shuddered slightly at the implications.
'No.' She said simply. 'What about you, does Nino know?'
He shook his head, before looking at her. 'Why Nino?'
'Because he seems to be the person you're closest to.' She shook her head, taking another bite of her cookie like a world-weary manager on their fourth cup of coffee. 'It's just my observations though. I didn't think you'd have said anything to your father, but Nino was my most likely option, if you would've told anyone.'
He nodded. 'I understand.' After a time he chuckled slightly. 'I used to think she hated me, before yesterday.'
'What do you mean?' She looked at him incredulously.
'Well, if you had someone who obviously disliked you to begin with, then proceeded to hardly speak two words strung together to me, and never even looked at me, can you blame me?' He tried to wave away.
'She's never hated you, Adrien.' Tikki sighed.
'Well, maybe hate's a strong word.' He admitted. 'And I got the impression that if she seriously hated me she'd've said something, but still,' he shook his head. 'How was I supposed to know that it was actually that she liked me? All the other girls who've ever liked me always told me, you should see the mailbox on Valentines Day,' he chuckled, but there was a dark undertone. 'It's getting them to stop and actually see me is the hard part.' He looked up at her. 'So how was I supposed to know?' He reiterated.
'By using your eyes, I'd say.' Plagg appeared through the door lazily, Adrien knew that if he had pockets he'd have his hands shoved in them, like a slightly grouchy teenager.
'Don't you think that's a bit harsh?' Tikki questioned, looking about to face him.
'No, because I'm not pussyfooting around.' Plagg shrugged, landing precisely halfway between Tikki and the welcome basket, where food awaited.
'I used my eyes!' Adrien complained, straightening indignantly.
'Don't lie, kid. I'll bet that's why Nino grinns at you whenever you'd mention Marinette.' Plagg grinned slyly.
'What, that's why?' He paused. 'Did Nino know about this?' He frowned at the feline kwami. 'How do you know about whether or not Nino knows about this?' He looked at Tikki, who was attending to crumbs on her hands absently, as if waiting for it all to blow over with practised patience. 'Did you know that he knew that Nino knows about this?'
'Buddy, I've been alive thousands of years and let me tell you; some looks never change.' Plagg rolled his eyes.
'What looks?' His mind was racing, what things had he missed?
Tikki picked up another cookie and took another meaningful bite out of it. 'I'll explain it to you when you're older.' She said patiently.
'Why not now?' He very nearly demanded.
'What's all the noise out here?' Came a sleepy voice from the doorway and Adrien jumped like he'd been caught doing something he shouldn't have.
Marinette was hovering uncertainly in the doorway, she had pulled on a long, comfortable sweater she had worn the previous day over her pyjamas. Her cheeks were flushed, and her hair was down and messy, like they had awoken her from a restless sleep.
'Just teenage angst.' Plagg grumbled, disappearing into the welcome basket. 'Just put me out of my misery.'
'We're just explaining a few things to Adrien here.' Tikki zoomed over to where Marinette was. 'More of the same.' She winked cheekily at Adrien.
Adrien stuck his tongue out at the little kwami. 'You're doing very little of actual explaining, you realise that don't you?'
Tikki stuck her tongue straight back at him, blowing a raspberry.
'Aren't you supposed to be thousands of years old?' Adrien shot.
'Aren't you supposed to be well groomed and mature?' Tikki returned playfully.
'Come on Marinette, you're on my side aren't you?' Adrien looked at the girl, who had approached a step or two closer towards her kwami, her hands bunched nervously into her long sleeves.
She flushed a deep red, biting her lip.
'Nope,' Tikki smiled, directing his attention away from the girl. 'Ladybugs and their kwamis have to stick together.'
'Well I say that she's on my side.' Plagg pointed out reappearing from the basket looking dejected.
'What's your side say?' Adrien questioned, rounding on him.
'I'm on the side of breakfast.' Plagg said resolutely. 'I've already eaten all the cheese from in there.' He nodded back into the basket.
Tikki smiled. 'You're always on the side of food.'
Plagg shrugged. 'Less politics that way.'
'Of course you are.' Adrien leant forward and seized him.
'Hey!' Plagg complained, slightly sharper than usual.
'I thought you were on the side of food?' Adrien grinned evilly at him. 'Come on then,' he pulled himself to his feet, feline Kwami in hand. He paused and looked uncertainly at Marinette. 'Any preferences, my lady?'
She shook her head, retreating a little in the direction of the bedroom.
He smiled gently, before transforming, not taking his eyes off of her the entire time.
'I'll be right back then.'
Tikki looked between the two gazing at each other for a long moment, then watched as Chat Noir disappeared out through the front door with a sad smile.
Marinette stared at the closed door for a time, wrapping her arms around herself, before she retreated once again.
The kwami followed Marinette back into the bedroom, then watched as she shut the door carefully behind them, and gave a glance around as if looking for something to bar the door with.
'Are you okay?' Tikki questioned.
Marinette moved over to shut the curtains, throwing them both into darkness.
Tikki zoomed back over to the light switch and flicked it, bringing light back into the room.
'Hey, Marinette,' Tikki started, turning to look, but Marinette had sat down heavily onto the edge of her bed, and now curled up into a tight ball.
She didn't even look at her kwami.
'Marinette?'
A tiny voice replied, but it was too muffled and indistinct to hear.
Tikki zoomed over to her holder, and perched on the girl's elbow. 'What did you say?'
'...I can't do this.' Came the tiny voice.
'Do what?' Tikki questioned, moving up to the girls shoulder.
'Now both Adrien and Chat are gone. I'll never get them back.'
'He just went out for some breakfast?' Tikki nodded towards the door.
'...that's not what I mean.' She turned her head away from the kwami.
Tikki moved some of Marinette's bangs out of the way in order to lay a comforting touch against the girl's forehead.
'Then what do you mean?'
'That person that was on the couch.' Marinette shook her head. 'That wasn't Adrien Agreste. And it wasn't Chat Noir.'
Tikki paused to consider this. 'What makes you say that?'
'Did you see how joking and open and playful he was? How he looked at me? That's not Adrien.' Marinette took a short breath. 'And did you see how reserved and careful he still was? That's not Chat Noir. I don't know who that person is.' She reiterated. 'And they're gone.'
'Adrien Agreste and Chat Noir are not gone, Marinette. You talk like someone died-'
'But things will never be the same!' Marinette snapped, clenching her hands into fists. 'Adrien has vanished in a puff of smoke! Chat Noir has disappeared without a trace!' She curled tighter into her ball. 'I don't know what to do!'
'Well, why don't you try getting to know the new person?' Tikki suggested agedly, but Marinette frantically shook her head.
'It's not the same! My partner and, well, Adrien, are supposed to be the same person!? Don't lie to me!'
'Marinette, it's really not as bad as you're making it out to be, you're getting carried-'
'Yes it is! Don't patronise me!' Marinette shot back, hunching her shoulders. 'And nothing you say is going to change this!'
'No,' Tikki agreed, 'it's not.'
And the kwami waited in silence as her holder cried.
'I'm back!' Chat called through the key card, pushing the door shut behind him with his foot.
Carefully, he locked the door behind him with the card held in his teeth, before moving to drop it onto the table. 'Ladybug?'
In his arms he held a humongous platter of pastries; croissants, danishes, tartes, everything. This he put carefully onto the coffee table, looking around in the quiet room.
'Anyone home?'
He released his transformation just as Tikki zoomed through the door to the bedroom, looking anxious.
'Is everything ok?' He questioned immediately, catching Plagg in an absentminded open hand.
'Well,' Tikki looked uncomfortable, 'not ok as it could be? Marinette just needs to work through a few things, then she'll be fine. Just give her some time.'
'Oh,' Adrien visibly wilted. 'Ok.' He seated himself on the couch, with Plagg trailing after him. He perked up slightly after a spell, and looked at her intently. 'Is there anything I can do?'
'Unless you can pull out something spectacular,' Plagg said, landing on the boy's knee, 'not particularly. These kinds of moments are delicate, and sometimes the holders just need to work through this by themselves.'
Adrien nodded, running his fingers through his hair uncertainly.
His mind was racing. Something spectacular? What would that entail? Flowers? A sincere note? Aphids?
No, no, something bigger than that.
His slightly hysterical mind handed up the image of an aphid the size of the ship, but he waved it away.
'Is this my fault?' He questioned, looking up at the ceiling.
'Well, yes.' Plagg told him heartlessly, cutting off whatever it was Tikki was going to say.
It was such an unexpected answer that Tikki was gobsmacked into silence, her mouth hanging open. But before she could jump to Adrien's defence, he spoke up.
'I figured as much.' Adrien pressed the base of his palms against his eyes, breathing deeply. 'It makes sense. It should be my fault.' All of those emotions that he had been bundling up suddenly rushed to the surface, expanding to fill his mind like the dark cloud of Nightmare from the previous night.
'That's not true!' Tikki argued indignantly, looking between the two of them. She zoomed up to land on his shoulder, before turning to scold Plagg.
'You don't have to soften it for me, Tikki, I'm used to it.' He let his hands fall away, and Tikki clammed up. 'I should've figured that coming on this trip was a bad idea.' He shook his head, seeming to deflate further. 'This way everything could have stayed the same.'
'Don't say that!' Tikki pressed earnestly. 'Coming on this trip let you have some freedom! And look at all the things you've learned, things you've seen!'
He shook his head. 'I learned that my father is heartless. I learned that Chloé is careless. I've seen that Ladybug should have never gotten so close to me. And now look what happened; I've hurt her with my own carelessness.'
Tikki facepalmed angrily, before she rounded on Plagg. 'And what have you got to say for yourself? Saying such hurtful things?'
Plagg shrugged unsparingly. 'I knew this was going to happen eventually. So did you,' he addressed Tikki, 'even if you didn't know about this. I know that you well know by now that the longer miraculous holders hold out on their identities the more it can affect them. Kid, you made this for yourself.'
'I know,' Adrien stared at the back of his hands, which were shaking slightly. 'Everyone leaves in the end. I forgot that.'
'How can you say such horrible things!' Tikki accused Plagg. 'You're blowing things way out of proportion! You're hurting your holder!' She accused.
'Because it's the truth.' Plagg gazed back evenly, with heat. 'You went too far. You put too much of yourself out there. Chat Noir was far too much of an escape, so much that he ran away from you. He's too different, and now you're forcing someone to try and stitch you two back together when you know that you struggle to do that yourself. Yes, Marinette's acting self-righteous and delusional but you're also to blame here. So you're right, in the end it is your fault.'
Adrien felt like he was sinking down, down, into a sort of world where everything was slightly darker. Everything was slightly blurred.
And everything was his fault.
Of course.
Thus,
Everything was as it should be.
It was a familiar sort of world.
It was alright now, now that he remembered his position in the world.
Plagg was right, he had indeed let things get away from him.
His heart was a vacuum in his chest, cold and empty.
Ready to accept his mistakes.
Of course, Ladybug would never speak to him again.
Now that she knew his deception, his lies.
He accepted that.
Marinette would likely never speak to him again.
He accepted that too.
For who could ever love such a person as he?
As soon as this was over, this so-called adventure, he would hang up his cloak, as it were, and return to the nothingness that was the life with his father.
Back to the emptiness that he knew his life would be.
He accepted that as well.
It was all that he was.
All that he could ever amount to be.
He could never trap Ladybug in that.
Because that was what he was doing, wasn't it?
Ensnaring her like some sort of spider, wrapping her up in his webs in order to bleed her dry.
He couldn't have that, not to her.
Never to her.
Plagg was right.
Speaking of, it seemed the kwamis were fighting.
Most likely, he was to blame for that as well.
That was fine.
He watched as the usually cheerful Tikki slapped Plagg hard.
Plagg flew from the force over the edge, of Adrien's knee, but appeared again quickly, jumping back into the fray.
This was ok.
Adrien had no energy to move.
His mind felt like it was being wrapped carefully in cotton wool, as he sunk further into his world of utter nothingness.
Marinette was ignoring the voices outside, but she looked up at the tiny shouts and cries of pain.
It took her a moment to find the will to move, but when she heard Tikki call out, she was on her feet.
Whatever was going on in her mind, she had to be there for Tikki.
She crossed the room, rubbing at her face, before pulling the door open slightly to peer through.
Adrien was sprawled on the couch, his eyes staring unseeingly at the ceiling, looking ashen.
And in his lap the kwamis were fighting, tooth and nail.
She stood for a moment, unsure, but when Plagg pulled on Tikki's antenna hard enough to make her cry out, Marinette burst through the door.
'What's going on!?' She crossed the room in quick strides, and slammed a hand between the two kwami, then closing her fingers around Tikki and pulling her away.
'It's not to do with you!' Plagg snapped at her, breathing heavily.
Adrien moved then, rolling his head slightly to look at her through glassy eyes.
'It's everything to do with her!' Tikki phased through Marinette's hand, and seizing Plagg once again. 'Why don't you have any sort of delicacy at all!?'
'Who has time for your delicacy?' Plagg shot back, grappling with her. 'I say the truth. Nothing less!' He rounded on Marinette. 'And speaking of, this is your idiocy too!'
'Don't you start on her!' Tikki exclaimed, pouncing upon him. 'I forbid you to say another word!'
'What, so that you can baby her too!? What's so wrong about this? Face facts!' Plagg snarled, and hissed at her, his hackles raising.
Tikki pulled back, surprised and hurt.
'Her narcissistic denial and delusional ineptitude are at fault too here! Just as much if not moreso!'
Tears of frustration pooled in Tikki's eyes as she stepped up to plate. 'You go too far!'
'What are you two talking about?' Marinette tried to force them apart again, but they just phased through her fingers. She looked at Adrien. 'Can't you help me?'
'No,' he said, and his voice sounded very far away. 'It's my fault anyway.'
Damn it, where was Alya when you needed her!? Marinette took a deep breath, unsure as to what to do.
What she needed was something to pull them apart.
'Tikki!' Marinette pulled herself together slightly. 'Transformes-Moi!'
Tikki, still grasping Plagg with a snarl until the last possible second, was sucked into Marinette's miraculous earrings, and Marinette transformed determinedly.
Ladybug seated herself next to the boy on the couch.
Even though her emotions were in turmoil, she knew she still cared deeply about this boy. Whoever he was, whoever he might be.
'Adrien?' She questioned, touching his shoulder.
Plagg flew up to say something, but Ladybug threw him such a glare that he quailed.
Adrien blinked slowly. His face was ashen, and he barely registered her presence.
Ladybug cupped a hand to his cheek. 'Please, Adrien, what's the matter?'
'It's my fault.' He repeated. 'And that's fine.'
'What is?' She looked at him in earnest.
'Everything.'
She wanted to facepalm. 'What do you mean, everything?'
He was quiet for a long moment, and she cupped his other cheek to make him look at her.
'Adrien, I don't understand,' Ladybug started again. 'Please, just let me in.'
Adrien, Chat Noir, whoever this was, he was her friend.
And she was supposed to be a superhero, damn it!
'It's my fault you're upset. I shouldn't have pressured you. I shouldn't have imposed myself on you. I shouldn't have caused you to struggle like this. It's my fault.'
'You're not pressuring!' She exclaimed. 'You're not imposing either! What on Earth makes you think that?' She shook her head violently. 'This is all my doing! I'm the one who should be guilty!'
He smiled slightly, tracing his fingers at the edge of her mask, around her puffy eyes.
'Because it always turns out this way. You can't stand the idea of Adrien Agreste being Chat Noir.'
She gripped his face tightly.
'That's not what I'm saying at all!' She shook her head. 'That's not what's going on at all! I'm just struggling with the idea of you two being the same person! And that's all me!'
'That's what I'm saying!' Plagg complained. 'He's made it too Bruce Wayne and Batman!'
Ladybug glared at him again, and he raised his hands in apology.
'You shut up! You've made everything worse!' She rounded on the kwami.
'Have I though?' He snapped irritably, before taking a few calming breaths. 'Everything's exactly the same. Only you're actually admitting to your emotions. I've said it before and I'll say it again; I have no time for angst.'
'You're too harsh with your words!' She barked. 'You left Adrien practically catatonic, look at him!'
'It's better than him pretending nothing's wrong and letting it fester away at him from the inside.' He countered. 'And the same goes for you! What if he held it against you? You and your "There's no way he could be Adrien! Because I know him one hundred persent!".'
She waved Plagg away, dismissing him with a hard glare, and tried to ignore the cracks that he had cut into her resolution.
'But things are different now,' Adrien said sadly.
'Yes they are!' Ladybug shot back. 'And I hate it! I hate being so unsure of myself! I hate seeing you like this! I hate doing this to you, putting you through all of the rubbish that's going through my head when it's all on me!'
'But it's my fault,' he persisted. 'You shouldn't blame yourself,'
'Well what are you going to do about it!?' She nearly shouted at him. 'What am I going to do about my own issues right now? How on earth am I going to make this up to you? How am I going to even start?'
Something snapped, and she made up her mind. 'What are we going to do about this? Together!' She said so suddenly, causing him to startle slightly. He looked at her with large eyes. 'Damn it Chat Noir, we're supposed to be two halves of the same whole. A team. So we can work through this, as long as we're together.'
There was wetness on his cheeks, and he pulled her forward into a tight hug.
Ladybug let herself be pulled, and wrapped her arms around the boy's shaking frame.
It was only a few moments before the two of them were howling, each and every sob forcing out the anguish that they had put upon themselves, and each other.
It was certainly turning out to be a tearful morning.
Let me know if this chapter works? I had to do some serious re-writing to get it all to come together, and I think this works? Plagg's doing the devils advocate but then goes too far in his anger to get them to understand, but getting them all to understand their positions in the reveals to the level that I need has been extremely difficult.
Again, let me know!