The Disclaimer is in the Summery, Self-insertion is by whoever made it, and Saguru and the idea for this story is mine.

Warning: Implied non-consensual drug use, slight violence, and darker times ahead.

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Saguru POV

Remember how I complained about my day going wrong, getting drinks spilled on me, eating cabbage, and just waking up on the wrong side of the bed in general? Remember how those were things that made my day terrible?

I have now found my definition for terrible corrected.

It starts when I wake up, mouth dry, head pounding, and still so tired.

Before me is a woman, sitting like a queen in a rather throne like chair, her kimono elegant and very well made, the image of a blue bonsai tree losing it's leaves against a background of green. She also has an obi on, the sash slightly lose, but still tight enough to keep her modest.

Now if she didn't look old as dirt, she could probably work it. As it is, I'm going to need some cleaner for my brain.

"Now, what is your name, little one." She practically coos at me, like a sweet grandmother or something. She even has her white hair all done in a proper bun like one would have, though her eyes belie her act, the green cold and unforgiving.

I keep my mouth shut, tight and firm. I remember tons of manga, even go over them in my spare time when I was bored and didn't have my twin to bother. I know what the wrong person can do with a name. And knowing my luck, if I give it to her, she might do something twisted with it.

At my silence, she sighs, as if filled with disappointment, before taking something out of her pocket.

It's my pendant. The pendant Sosuke gave me.

I know I probably gave myself away, as the woman merely smiles, but I don't care. I am most likely going to die, or at least I'll never see my brother again. That pendant is probably the last thing I'll ever have to remind me of any warm feelings during however long I live through this.

And it's the only thing that I can truly call mine in this world, that is solid and that I can touch. And while I have my thoughts and memories, sometimes a person needs something real to cling on to. And I need it now more then ever.

"Now, answer my questions dear, and I'll give you back your necklace." I really want to wipe the smile off her face, but I nod. For all I know, she could destroy it if I'm disobedient.

"Good, now your name dear." She asks (demands) as she takes out some paper, putting my neckwear on the arm of her chair so she can write.

"…Saguru." I answer after some hesitancy. She hadn't asked for my full name, so unless she does, I won't give it to her.

"Age and Birthday?"

"13... And May 29th."

"Oh, so you just turned 13 a week ago?"

"Yes."

"Hmmm, I see. How long have you been in Soul Society?"

"A year and a week."

"Not too long then. What have you eaten in the past few days?

And on it went with all the question.

Some of the questions made no sense to me, while others were rather invasive. I answered with as much as I could get away with, keeping as much details as I could to myself. But it was the last question that would have made me tense, if I wasn't so tired that I couldn't have reacted even if I wanted to. Why was I so sleepy?

"That's interesting. Now here is the final question; do you have any family members, anyone at all that would miss you?"
I make sure to avoid any thoughts of my twin (who knows, the bitch might be a mind reader). Instead, I focus on the resentment and pain I have long since associated with my pass life. The loneliness that bleeds through when I think too long of family and Sosuke isn't there to snap me out of it. Who knew it would have it's uses?

"No." I answer dully, frowning at how much harder it is to stay awake. Did the drug me? Poisoned?

"All right then, that part is finished. Now, since you were so good and well behaved, I'm giving this back to you." The woman says with a smile, handing me my pendant back to my surprise. I wouldn't have thought she would give it back to me at all, or would have destroyed it before my eyes. Maybe she's not that cruel?

I am soon corrected.

"But if you misbehave Saguru, I'll take it away again. And if you keep doing so like so many others, I may not give it back." She says this after I have put it back on, smile still planted on her face.

Have I ever mentioned I hate psychological warfare? No? Well now I have.

Still pissed and terrified, I never notice when she readies a syringe, until the sucker is plunged right into my vulnerable neck, as I realized that I'm wearing a hospital gown-like kimono instead of my regular clothes.

"Now that the Physical, Spiritual, and Mental evaluations are done, it's time to begin Experiment 0021, conducted and viewed by I, Zora, and my assis-"

I can no longer hear anything, the pain in my body agonizing, as it feels like my blood is being frozen, then super heated, then trying to escape my body before the cycle repeats, some happening more then others.

All I know now is pain, pain, pain, pain.

This is only the start of my association with that sensation, for the days to come will be filled with it, being the one thing I will for sure always remember.

Physically, spiritually, and mentally.

Happy Holidays?