You all know where the Disclaim thing is. Thanks again for all the support for this story.
Warning: Death, Cursing, Mental Problems... You all probably won't like me in a minute... Scratch that, you'll all probably hate me in a minute.
Saguru POV
I really wish I could stop thinking sometimes; maybe then I'll have some peace.
Me and Ai had managed to get the heck out of dodge, and luckily got found by the team sent out to search for us. We had been taken to the Thirteenth, and I thought we could finally breathe, as Retsu-sama and another healer were sent for.
They never had a chance, because as it turns out, Miyako wasn't pregnant. After all, what's the best method of hiding a foreign presence in a woman?
Metasacia was just being clever, gathering his strength. And I should have fucking seen it, the Hollow still touched her, even if it didn't disappeared right away.
(And am I ever so grateful that I didn't use my bandages, worried about how they would react to an unborn baby; I prevented the bastard from getting powerful quicker.)
It was horrifying, watching Miyako's body be used in such a way, and not able to do anything quick enough due to exhaustion and pain. It takes time, rest, and food to fully heal, and I haven't been getting a lot of that lately, despite Monroe's help.
But as I watch Kaien chase after her, Rukia and their Captain following, I can't help but feel numb. I know someone asks if I'm alright, but I can't really say so.
And how can I? I try and save my first crush turned good friend from my brother and she still dies.
Taking a deep breath, I let it out, before following after the trio, pushing back the pain and fatigue in my body. (I ignore the cries that follow my disappearance.)
I may have failed Shiba Miyako, but I absolutely refuse to fail her completely.
Due to the fact that I am tired as fuck and that my body is currently badmouthing me from my aches and brusies, when I finally find the three, the fight has started.
And just like I remember, Kaien was an idiot to the nth degree.
I mean shit, fighting the Hollow that killed your wife when not in your right mind? Tell the powerful backup to stand aside while I act like the idiot I am?
(Then again, dumb points for actually listening. Congrats Backup.)
There is a fucking reason there is a saying about revenge and two graves. (This is why when going out for revenge you gather a group of other individuals with unique abilities to help. More chance of you living that way.)
Taking in everything, I try and take in the fight. From what I see, Kaien has been possessed (shit), 13th's Captain (can't remember his name for the life of me) is coughing, and the Hollow-possessed Lieutenant is heading for Rukia.
"If you want to help, you have to do something NOW." Ryu-chan warns, her voice shrill with worry. (Wonder why? I know she doesn't care about the guy or Rukia.)
It's instinct what I do.
I nab the Shiba with my blood bandages.
"Aizen-san!" is the shocked gasp that comes Rukia, and exclamation from the Captain.
"You." The possessed soul says, narrowing his eyes.
I feel a smile coming over my face, though it must be a sight, if it makes the two healthier souls back away, Rukia with fear, the long-haired man with caution.
"Me." I say, my voice sounding strange to myself, "You're one of the Hollows from that forest, aren't you?"
"And you're the Shinigami Medic who healed me in that other body, thinking it was your comrade. So what are you going to do now, fail in saving another comrade to me? Must be tragic for a medic. I'll enjoy the pain on your face." Metasacia taunted, before gasping as I tighten the bandages around him to a much more uncomfortable degree.
"I don't plan for anymore deaths then yours tonight." My words sound rather ominous, if I do say so myself.
"Oh, really, and how do you plan to do that? Are you going to heal me, Medic? You did a good job last time." for looking as creepy as he does now, Possessed-Kaien really pulls off mocking amusement well.
"Why I do; after all, purging poisons and parasites is in my resume." I answer, allowing my smile to grow just a little bigger.
Then I let the bandages enter the body. (Plenty of cuts for them to enter through.)
Now, I've figured my blood is a powerful healing agent already, though I've seen what it does to people I'm frustrated with.
Wonder how it'd react to entering something I hate?
The scream that comes from that body is rather traumatic, if I do say. (And I enjoy every single minute of it.)
Watching how Kaien seems to shed his skin is rather disconcerting, though I can't help but frown when I see how it dissolves in the air.
Damn, doesn't that Hollow have, like, the save ability (appearing where you last saved), which means... that piece of shit is still alive somewhere.
Screw. My. Life.
"Kaien!" at the Captain's call, I turn my attention back to the Lieutenant.
Only to see a familiar looking mask facing me. And it's not familiar in the way 'I've-seen-this-before', it's 'It-looks-similar-to-something-I've-seen'.
The mask is a round white oval, the eye-holes two medium sized tear-drop shapes, the left one having that same design around the eye that Metasacia had. And all along the edges is a blue line, outlining the whole, very much Visored Mask.
Crap, I put Shiba Kaien though Hollowifcation.
...
Oh, there are so many levels of shit I'm in, I don't think I'll ever smell clean again.
It makes sense, having a Hollow fused with your soul, then ripping it out while at the same time healing what is possible. Of course there will be side-effects. (And for the first time, I feel nervous about my ability; just how powerful is it? And just how does it work?)
Uh oh.
"I'll be... fine." yeah, can you sound anymore reassuring, "... Why did you help me." Kaien then asks me, point blank. (Probably wondering why the brother is helping him.)
Fine, two can be that frank.
"I failed Shiba-chan; I'm not going to fail her completely by letting her husband die when I could do something." I growl.
Green eyes narrow, "...You'd do that for a friend?" (... Hypocrite much? I mean, am I really that suspicious? ... Okay, maybe I am, but come on!)
I snarl in return, "I'd do that for Shiba Miyako, one of the few who I can count on my hand of the souls who look at me, and doesn't see the freak, the experiment, the accident waiting to happen. One of the little few who looked at me and saw me as I am; a soul, maybe broken, but still here, still existing, still filled with emotion. She was a normal soul, who by all right should have avoided me and left me space like the rest, but instead decided to have me in her life and call me friend. One of the fucking few who I was able to still care and-" Here I bite my tongue, stopping myself from saying too much.
Though judging by the dumbfounded look, I didn't succeed. (Damn geniuses.)
"You... You really did love her, didn't you." no need to look so narrow-eyed. (And why does he have the 'I-knew-it' look?)
Looking hard at the man, I sigh, feeling the fight drain from me, leaving me tired and pained. "... As much as I emotionally can. I was certainly fond of her, it was hard not to be, but I never told her. No way in hell would I ruin our friendship like that."
"Besides," I add, because I can, "I, in no way, shape, or form, am a dramatic home-wrecker. No. Thank. You."
The sound of the face palm is music to my ears.
"So, what are you going to do now; you can't go back home." I point out, because we do not have all night. (I certainly don't at least.)
"What?" Rukia looks shocked, looking to Kaien, "Why can't you?"
"... Kaien has been Hollowifed, an illegal process, though not much is known about it. If he were to return..." ...Ukitake (finally remembered it!) says, trailing off.
"He would be put in custody of the 12th division, where they will experiment with him, execute him, then play around with his remains for more experiments." I wonder if my voice can get any flatter. Seeing the looks on there faces at my words, I give a grim smile.
"That is the most likely possibility." Kaien sighs, looking stressed.
I look at him hard, wondering if I should say my next piece. On one hand, it could help him; on the other, he'll be so suspicious.
Eh, why not? I'm not doing this for the suspicious bastard. Going over to the man, I lean in to whisper in the guy's ear, knowing the other two won't hear. (I purposely ignore how the former-Lieutenant tenses.)
"On your Hollow problem... Remember, it's basically all the negative aspects of yourself; and if you can't accept it, you're basically going to be at war with yourself 24/7. And what kind of fighter is that?" I whisper, then back away, enjoying the look of surprise on his face.
(Lets hope Fanfiction has its uses and that I just didn't screw him over.)
"Now, if you three don't mind, I'm going to pass out soon; please have someone drag me to the Fourth if you can?" I say, before the pretty spots take over my vision.
Well, darkness has always been a friend of mine, being there when I need it; this time isn't any different.
You know, waking up to see Retsu-sama's worried face is terrifying and guilt inducing in it's own right. Though I rather dwell on that then when Captain Ukitake came him, basically telling me that Kaien is 'dead', and may we meet him again someday in the next life.
So, Kaien got away huh? I hope everything turns out alright for him, for Miyako's sake.
Though I now have a suspicious captain on me, which means I will soon have another one, as Ukitake comes as a package deal.
But you want to know the really fucked up part about this situation? The part that makes me cringe and really look at myself?
I still love my twin as much as I did before this shit storm.
Oh sure, I'm pissed at him, more then I've ever been, but enough to hate him?
I probably could never hate Sosuke.
I really am insane, aren't I?
"It's not your fault." I blink when I hear that, turning to look at the Speaker from my bed.
It's Ai. (Wonder how she found me? And what is she talking about?)
"You did everything in your power to keep Shiba-san alive, I saw how much effort and care you put into your healing when we traveled." Is said in the ever doleful tone that Ai seems cursed to speak in, "The same effort you took to make sure I was well and healthy too. So thank you, Aizen-san; for keeping me alive and giving me the chance to come home again. To be able to learn more, to better myself, and to become stronger in both mind and spirit." You know, I have a feeling that that part was more directed at myself.
Still doesn't mean that it isn't half-bad advice.
Watching as the reverse trap nods to me, her cropped hair still messy and dirty, her eyes just as black as her hair, and the features most young men carry with a sorrowful twist to them, she goes on her way.
After a bit, I get up from the bed, ignoring my bandages.
I need to see a certain someone; for comfort.
I must really be fucked in the head as I sneak into the Fifth, easily going right up to the captain's door and knocking.
"Come on in." Is said, the voice naturally causing me to feel comforted.
Maybe because the owner of that voice is the only one who can truly make me feel safe?
Going inside, I see the exact moment when Sosuke's fake smile falls as he just stares, looking shocked.
Huh, must have been really backed up if he doesn't know where I've been.
"Saguru-kun? What happened?" He asks, his voice soft as he looks at me with worry. I admit it makes me want to scream when I just feel better knowing he cares.
Why does the one person I trust, love, and care for have to be such a manipulative soul who invokes in me such confusing feelings and thoughts.
Not wanting to focus on that, I tell Sosuke what happened (excluding my foreknowledge of the situation, Monroe, and that I accidentally Hollowifed Kaien).
And he just listens while making me some tea, after which he sits down next to me to drink with.
By the time I'm through, the tea has all been drunk and I'm leaning my head against Sosuke's shoulder, probably getting his uniform dirty with all the mess.
I should have probably taken a shower before coming. (Probably wasn't passed out long enough to give me one, just long enough to clean and heal my injuries.)
"…I'm truly sorry you had to go through such an experience, Saguru." my twin tells me, running his hand through my hair like when we were kids and I was terrified of the sounds coming from outside.
(You learn to fear those sounds when they can be a Hollow or bandits ready to kill or sell you.)
I can't help but give a little sigh, closing my eyes at the genuine words my brother said. I know he is sorry about the pain I experienced, but he really could care less about the other deaths in the squad.
I am insane, for trusting, caring, loving a brother like him.
But there is the key word, brother.
I'm going to have to learn more and get stronger, if I'm going to be able to fight and help in the war against Aizen.
(And keep my brother, Sosuke, alive as well.)
(AN)- ... Again, don't hurt me, I bleed easily!
(And Happy Holidays!)