Here it is folks!!! Emmett and James finally have their talk!

DISCLAIMER: The characters do not belong to me…they are all the creation of the wonderful Stephenie Meyer.

Beware of the Bear

Emmett's POV

I held Lily close as I bounded up the few stairs and onto Carlisle and Esme's porch. I opened the front door and stepped inside—Esme had given me an open invitation after my very first visit. "Squirt? We're here."

"Urt, here!" my little princess repeated smiling up at her daddy. I loved this little girl more than should be allowed—God help any man who made her cry. I would commit murder for her without a second thought. For the Squirt, I was just going to rough the creep up a little.

Esme, Carlisle, and Edward came out, greeting Lily more than me, but I didn't mind. My girl was loved and lovable.

"Look at that, Princess. A welcoming committee," I chuckled. "Where's Bella?"

"In the kitchen," Esme replied, kissing my cheek. Lily dove for her grandmother, snuggling into Esme's arms happily. "Hello, sweet baby girl," Esme cooed. "Let's go see Aunt Bella."

"Bee-bee," Lily sang as we all headed into the kitchen.

"Hey, Lily Bear," Bella greeted with a big smile. She still looked a little pale to me and I hoped it was just that cold bug she'd been fighting. Esme held Lily out so she could kiss Bella's cheek. "Oh, you are so sweet," Bella chuckled. "I don't know how your daddy ever lets you out of his sight."

"It's tough," I said honestly as I pressed my lips to my baby sister's head. She was only a little warm—if she'd been any hotter, I'd have found a babysitter for the princess. "How are you doing, Squirt?" I asked.

"Almost completely over my cold," she said, sounding only slightly muffled.

I sat down next to her and held her hands, getting her to look right at me. She wasn't going to be allowed to edit on this one. "And the James thing?"

She shrugged like it didn't matter, but her brown eyes misted up and said otherwise. "Nothing I can do about that. And I don't really know yet what he's decided."

"You sure you feel up to watching her tonight?" I pressed.

"Emmett, I've looked forward to this all day. Please don't worry, and let me have fun with my niece," Bella pleaded. I sighed, knowing I wasn't going to be able to deny her with her bottom lip jutting out like that.

"We're going to have a quiet night in, just the three of us," Edward promised, bouncing my little girl in his arms. "Grandma and Grandpa have a dinner to go to tonight."

"Eee," Lily laughed. I looked up just in time to see her smack her little head against Edward's big bony one. I winced, hoping she hadn't hurt herself too badly.

"Ouch," Edward said, rubbing Lily's head. "You've got to be more careful, Sweetheart."

My girl might have been a princess, but she was also a fighter. She just laughed at her uncle and then put her head on his shoulder.

"Alright, well me and Rosie are heading out to dinner at that new Mexican restaurant downtown. If you change your mind about Lily sleeping over, you call me, Squirt. I don't care what time it is," I told her, only partially lying. Mexican was on the menu, but it was more hat dance than burrito—actually, more of a face dance if I had my way.

"Em, I'm not changing my mind," Bella said, her expression serious. "Go and enjoy a night out with your wife."

"Alright," I sighed, getting up from the chair. It was a good thing her pregnancy was making it hard for her to spot things; otherwise, she'd be begging me to behave and leave the little creep alone. I'd warned him about making my sister cry, so it was his own fault that he hadn't listened. I pushed those thoughts to the side and focused on my sister. I kissed and hugged her goodbye. "I love you, Bella."

"I love you, too, Brother Bear. Have fun and tell Rose 'hello' for me," she said, giving me a big smile.

"Edward, you keep her still," I ordered, shaking my brother-in-law's hand. Edward might piss me off every so often, but he was a good man and he loved my sister like crazy. Tonight's activities were as much for him as they were for Bella. "Bye, Princess. Daddy will see you tomorrow morning."

"Bye-bye," Lily sang as she gave me one of her baby kisses, slobbering all over my cheek.

I laughed for my baby girl and wiped my face. "I love you, Lily. Be good for Uncle Edward and Aunt Bella." I gave her a little wave and then headed out of the house.

"Any problems?" Rose asked as I slid into the jeep.

"Nope. Baby girl is happy with her aunt and uncle, and the Squirt doesn't suspect a thing," I told her.

"Perfect," Alice chirped. "Let's get going."

"Alice, are you sure you should be coming along for this?" Jasper asked, putting his hand over her stomach protectively.

"Jazzy, I love you, but if you ask me that once more, I'm going to rip your pretty little blonde hair right out of your head," she threatened with a sweet smile on her face. It made me shiver.

"She's not leaving the street, Jasper. Neither am I. We're only here as the wonderful, amazing, sexy alibi's you two will need," Rose said with a little chuckle. Damn, I loved this woman. Another good reason to rearrange this little creep's face—he was making me miss sexy time with my Rosie.

"So I came up with another great joke about tonight," I said, looking up at Jasper in the rearview mirror.

"Right," Jasper replied, rolling his eyes. "That's what you said about the last one."

"Not my fault you don't know a good joke when you hear one," I said.

Rose smiled and took my hand into hers. "Em, far be it from me to dash your little dream of becoming a world-renowned comedian, but saying you're going to turn James's Chihuahua face into guacamole isn't really a joke. It's just a Mexican-themed threat."

"Rosie, I thought you loved me, baby," I said, pouting at her for effect.

"I do love you," she assured me. "But that doesn't mean I have to love your jokes or even find them funny."

"Can we get back to a topic that actually matters?" Alice chirped. "We need to go over the plan once more."

"Pipe down back there, Pixie," I joked, smiling at Alice in the rearview mirror.

"Fine. Come up with your own plan then," she huffed, crossing her arms in front of her chest.

"You're still sore that your grand plan to out James never got to go into effect," I told her.

"No, not really," Alice replied with a shrug of her tiny shoulders. "I actually like this Plan 'B' so much better. You know revenge has always been my special forte."

"Yes, you did enjoy torturing the Stanley girl mercilessly," Jasper chuckled. "I'm sure you've been missing the joy it brings you."

"I still can't believe you actually ran her off to Alaska," Rose chuckled. "What's she doing up there again?"

"I heard she's a housekeeper…in a brothel. Three sisters run the place and handle the customers," Alice explained. "Or so I hear. Then again, it could all be in that Yorkie kid's head."

"Yorkie?" I asked. "Why does that name sound familiar?"

"Pizza delivery guy," Alice chirped.

"You get your info from the pizza boy?" I chuckled. "You're even fruiter than I thought."

"No, Bella's pizza is fruity," Alice corrected. "I am a woman who knows that a large tip on a slow night, combined with a little innocent flirting, will get the pizza boy to spill his guts. Jessica ordered her pizza every Wednesday night, at exactly seven-fifteen so that it would arrive by eight. She ordered pepperoni with extra cheese and ranch sauce on the side. Want to know what her apartment looked like?"

"No," Rose laughed. "That's quite enough already."

"So what info do you have on tonight's target, Pixie?" I asked her.

She shook her head, frowning a little. "I googled him…And I was disturbed by what I found."

"What? Is this guy like some stalker freak or something? Do I need to actually break the little bastard?" I asked.

"Calm yourself, you big grizzly bear," Alice chided, slapping the side of my arm. "It's nothing that awful. He's just got a myspace page with the most god-awful graphics and music on it. It seriously gave me and the baby a tummy-ache."

"Sure it was the page and not the four waffles you had for breakfast?" Rose questioned with a smirk. God, I loved her smirks. I loved her lips. I loved her—Focus Emmett! You have a creep to set straight.

"Alice, how do you know he'll be down there tonight?" Jasper asked.

"It was on his myspace," she replied with a wicked smile. "Apparently, little James isn't too shy to enjoy the occasional poetry slam."

"I can just imagine it now," I said, smiling wide. I looked around at my family and cleared my throat. "There once was a lonely boy who had a friend named Bella. Her big brother was one very scary fellah. Lonely fucked up and made her cry. Now he's got busted ribs and a black eye. Can't complain for being mauled by a bear. He didn't listen, so it's only fair."

"How eloquent you become when excited by the prospect of hitting something," Jasper chuckled.

"Emmett," Alice giggled, her little body shaking against Jasper's side. "That was the best."

Rose leaned over and ran her fingers down my arm teasingly. "Baby, if you teach our daughter to ever say anything like that, I'm going to show you what it's like to be mauled," Rose threatened with a perfect smile.

"Rosie, I may not always be the brightest bulb on the tree, but I still know when to blink," I chuckled.

"What?" Alice and Jasper laughed.

I rolled my eyes at them. "It means I still know when to behave and use my brain."

Friday night traffic held us up a few times, but we still made it downtown plenty early enough to "accidentally" run across James. Alice knew he'd never buy us going into the café, but since the Mexican restaurant was just a few doors down, bumping into him on the street outside was completely possible.

"God, the chimichangas smell excellent," Alice said, sniffing the air.

"How the heck can you pick that out of all the other smells around here?" I asked. "All I smell is food."

"The nose knows," Alice shrugged. "Oh, he's getting ready to come out."

"Perfect," I said, cracking my knuckles.

"Emmett, you have to start out talking," Rose cautioned, putting her hands on mine.

"And if it turns to hitting, you have to escort him into the alley first," Alice reminded me for the billionth time.

I put my arms around my wife and drew her close, looking right into her beautiful blue eyes. She had the most perfect eyes—crystal clear blue and always full of love when they were looking at me. "I love you, Rosie. Any other woman on this planet would have made me stay home and stay out of this."

Rose's fingernails scratched lightly against my scalp as she ran her fingers through my hair. "I always support my man when he's taking care of his family." Her fingers wrapped around my curls and she roughly pulled my face to hers, giving me a kiss that briefly made me consider taking her home and forgetting all about what's his name.

"If you two don't mind, the reason we came down here tonight is walking in the opposite direction," Jasper interrupted.

"Go get him," Rose whispered, using her thumb to wipe her lipstick from my lips. God, what a woman!

With a shake of my head and an adjustment of my now tight jeans, I turned and headed for the little creep who'd been causing so much trouble. "Hey, James? Is that you, buddy?" I called out, a friendly smile on my face.

The little nerd stopped and turned, pushing his glasses up on his face. "Um…Emmett, right?" he asked, already shaking in his little penny loafer shoes.

"Yeah," I replied, smiling wider with just a little menace peeking out. "You remember my wife, Rosalie, my brother-in-law, Jasper, and his wife, Alice?"

"Sure. From the party," James replied, looking around anxiously. He was smart enough to realize his life was in danger, even if he didn't know why just yet. "Is…uh…is—"

I ended his stupid stuttering, his voice grating on my nerves. "My sister is home with her husband, that she loves, and my daughter."

"Sure. Of course," James replied, nodding his head. He looked like a bobble head and I bit the inside of my lip not to laugh at him. "So, uh…what do you want?" he asked.

"Oh, nothing. We're just on our way to that restaurant over there," I explained, pointing to the spot for him. "We saw you and thought we'd say 'hey'. Oh, and goodbye. Edward said you planned to head back to Minnesota."

"Well, I haven't decided yet. I thought I'd take a few days to think it over, like Edward had suggested."

"Yeah, but you realize the best thing for you is going home, right? You go home, you lick your wounds clean, you find a girl who's not married. You know, be normal, James. Not a home wrecker."

"What?" he asked, taking a step back from me.

I quickly stepped forward with a huge smile on my face, hooking an arm around James's shoulder and making it appear for everyone around us that we were the best friends ever. I started walked, forcing James to follow along with me. "Yeah, man. It's been great to see you and know you, but I totally understand why you need to get your self back home. Down time. That's very important after a mistake like the one you made."

"Mis-mistake?" he stuttered, trying stupidly to get out of my grip.

I tightened my arm around him and enjoyed his hiss of pain. "Yeah, you know, your mistake. Making my sister cry and all."

"Hey, she led me on," he yelled as we entered the deserted and shadowy alley. "She was the one who started talking to me."

"Is that so?" I asked, my voice calm. This little pipsqueak didn't know calm was deadly with me. I let go of his arm and backed him into the building wall, pinning him there with my arms on either side of his head. "Because I heard she tried to be your friend and you tried to become her husband. She was only trying to talk to you about books and make you feel like you weren't alone in the world because she's soft-hearted that way. She cares too much sometimes. And then you saved her from falling so she felt like she owed you something, like she needed to make sure you had at least one friend in the world. And you took advantage of that. You found ways to use that against her and trick her into inviting you to lunches and my party."

"You're making that up," he said, pushing his glasses up his nose. I wanted to take those damn glasses off his face and crush them with my boot, but I resisted. Boot prints were evidence, or so Alice had warned during the briefing she'd held earlier.

"So tell me your side of things," I offered.

"Well, I…She…And then…" he stuttered, his eyes wild as he looked to Jasper, Rose, and Alice for help. Rose and Alice were keeping their promise and they were standing under one of the bright street lights, pretending to be engrossed in oohing and awing over Alice's handbag. Jasper was at the mouth of the alley, his arms folded in front of him and his face set in a menacing scowl—I was impressed.

"Sounds to me like you're fresh out of lies," I told James. "And what a coincidence! I'm all out of patience," I snarled, leaning my face into his. "I'll give you a choice, James. You can leave with a few broken ribs and a very black eye to remind you why you've promised to stay away from my family. Or you can say you won't and then I'll pick a few limbs to break to see if I can't get you to change your mind."

"You can't touch me. I'll call the cops. I'll sue."

"Call the cops. Tell them. And I'll say that I was with my wife and our family, enjoying a night out on the town. You see, James, what you don't know about me, is that I've beaten the shit out of a lot of guys in my lifetime. I know exactly how and where to hit so that all of the bruises are on my target and not me. It's an amazing technique and I'm more than happy to share it in all of its various forms."

"I'll get your sister fired if you touch me," he said, his voice shaking with his fear.

I lifted my finger up to my chin, pretending to consider his words. And then I lifted that finger and pressed it to his forehead, knocking his head against the wall behind him. "Oops. I think I touched you."

"You won't get away with this," James promised.

So I decided to make a promise of my own. "James, let me point out a few things to you. You're all alone in Seattle. You probably don't write or call Mommy and Daddy very often. You don't have any friends. Hell, you don't even own a cell phone. Do you really think anyone is going to miss you if you disappear permanently?" I wasn't really going to kill the little idiot, but he didn't know that, and I wanted him to be more afraid of me than of anything he'd ever come across in his life.

"Oh, shit," Jasper laughed suddenly.

"What?" I asked, looking over at him.

Jasper laughed again as he pointed at James. "You made him piss his pants."

I looked down and sure enough, there was a dark trail flowing down his khaki pants. "Oh, James. I'm so sorry, man. I didn't realize you were so weak in the bladder."

"I'll go home. I'll fly out tonight. Just let me go," James blubbered, looking between Jasper and me. "I'll transfer my school and everything."

"I could believe you and just let you go. But then I think about all the things you've already lied about and I just can't seem to trust you, James."

"So…so what do I do? What will you believe?"

"Incentive."

"What? What do you mean incentive?"

"Well, James, it's like this. If I believe you have enough incentive to stay away from my family, then I can believe you and let you go. If there's no incentive, then there's no trust. And without trust, aren't we all just animals in this world?"

"What?" James cried, looking somewhere between confused and horrified. "I don't understand you. You're talking like a crazy person."

"Or maybe I'm just so smart your brain can't handle it and you assume I'm crazy," I replied. Now I was just fucking with the dude. And it was fun! "You know, if we were in the animal kingdom, I'd totally be a bear. All that fur and those badass claws. Yeah, I'd maul everything in my path. And you…Yeah, I think you'd be a chipmunk. A late night snack that gets caught between my teeth and I have to pick you out with this huge ass splinter my claws slice off a tree trunk. Yeah, that would be the way to go in the animal world."

"I should have just stayed away from her," James said, shaking his head and looking at his shoes. "I should have just did my work and kept my head down. I should have known it was too good to be true, that she couldn't like me that way. And now I'm going to die in this nasty alley that reeks of ass. This complete psycho, talking about bears, is just going to rip my head off and that'll be it. I'll be known as the headless alley guy."

"Are you emo?" I asked, messing with him a little more. "Are you prone to crying like a pansy?"

James lifted his head and stared at me with wide eyes. "What? What does that have to do with anything?" His voice rose with each new word he spouted out. "Look, can you just kill me already? The anticipation is going to do it for you if you don't act soon. Just…just don't leave my parents wondering okay? Just find some way to tell them I'm the dead alley guy."

"What? You think I would actually soil my own soul over you?" I asked him, making my voice sound offended. "You think I would end up in hell, away from my family, over your sorry ass? Dude, you're fucked up."

"But you…but why…What?" he stuttered, his whole face scrunched up in confusion.

With his face set so perfectly in position, I let my fist fly, connecting perfectly with his right eye and enjoying the satisfying "whack" of his head hitting the concrete wall behind him. "That was for making my sister cry." I gave a few quick double punches with both fists to his stomach as he struggled to get enough air in to yell out in pain. I behaved myself—I didn't break his ribs, but he wasn't going to be walking straight for awhile either. "Those were for Edward and me."

James grabbed his stomach and slumped down onto the wet ground, groaning and panting.

I squatted down in front of him and roughly jerked his head up by his hair. "Are we clear?"

"Yeah," he panted. "I'm going home. I don't even look your sister's way, much less talk to her."

"And tonight?"

"Never happened."

I smiled and gently patted his shoulder, probably enjoying his cringe a little too much, but hey! That's just me. "Good boy, James. I'm glad we could have this talk. And I look forward to never speaking to you again." I stood up and looked down at him once more. "You know, James, you're probably a pretty likable guy when you aren't screwing with somebody's family. You should work on that. Find yourself a nice, unattached girl back home."

I turned and walked away, joining up with Jasper. He knocked his fist against mine and smiled. "Very nice. I was a little worried you were going to get carried away with your anger a couple of times, but you stayed in control," he said.

"And that's why I'm your favorite brother from another mother," I chuckled, slinging my arm around Jasper's shoulders.

We stepped out of the alley and joined our wives. "You two kiss and make-up?" Rose asked, giving me a sly smile.

"Jazzy sexed me up just right," I joked, puckering my lips at him.

He punched me in the side and pushed me away, giving me a kick to the back of my knee for good measure. "You're an ass."

Rose laughed as she wrapped her arms around my neck and pressed her body into mine. "Yeah, but he's all mine and I love the big bear."

"I love you, too, baby," I said, kissing her ruby red lips lightly. "I'm starving. Let's eat."

"Took the words right out of my mouth," Alice chirped from her spot in Jasper's arms. "I want a burrito and two tacos, and chips. Lots of chips. Oh, and some of that white cheese sauce. I love that stuff."

"Pixie, you need to actually be sitting down with the waiter in front of you before you give the order," I joked, smiling over at Alice.

"Emmett, don't you have a little something to say to me?" Alice asked, smiling up at me.

"Yep. You're short, you shop too much, and you're down right mean when you want to be," I told her. And then I smiled. "And I love you for it, Alice Hale."

"And what else?" she asked, blowing on her nails and looking mighty pleased with her little self.

"Your plan was amazing, flawless, and worked as perfectly as you said it would," I said. "Thank you for helping me to fix that little problem for my baby sister. I owe you one."

"You certainly do," she chirped, wrapping her little arms around me. I was careful as I hugged her back, not wanting to squeeze her like I normally did. I had a little niece or nephew hanging out inside of her and I had to be careful with him or her. "Thank you," Alice said softly. "I know you did that as much for Edward as you did for Bella and I appreciate it so much, Em."

"I love them, too, Al," I said, kissing her spiky head. "Now, let's quit all this touchy feely crap and get some food. I need a burrito and a Corona."

"I am so getting a Margarita," Rose sighed, snuggling right up against me.

"Get two," Alice giggled. "Then you can drink one for me."

Rose leaned up and whispered into my ear. "I'll only drink one, baby. I have plans for you for later and they don't involve either of us being too drunk to enjoy them."

I leaned down and nipped her ear lightly. "I love you, Rosalie." And then I cupped her perfect cheek in my hand—and it wasn't the one on her beautiful face. "And your dirty little mind."

"For the millionth time, can you two refrain from that in front of me?" Jasper asked. "I realize you're married. I realize you do things together—some very sick and twisted things—but that doesn't mean I can handle seeing them."

"Sure, Jazz," Rose laughed, smiling at her brother. "We promise to behave for the rest of the time we're with you and Alice."

"Thank you," Jasper sighed, looking relieved. "That's all I'm asking for."

"Let's get inside and do some celebrating," I said, holding the restaurant door open for my family to pass through.

It had taken me a long time to put life back together again for Bella and me. There was no way in hell I would let anyone or anything screw it up now. If I had to walk through the fires of hell and wrestle the devil himself, I would do it twice. This was my family and anyone who messed with them, was just begging to meet with my fists.

Rose's soft hand slipped into mine and instantly cooled my thoughts, leaving me to imagine what her plans for later on tonight might be. I was going to have to thank Bella and Edward twice for babysitting tonight. Yeah, I had a damn fine family I belonged to—my Swahallen family.

Wise words from Blinding Firefly: Learning from your mistakes is all well and good, but provoke not a brother bear to wrath, for you are crunchy and good with ketchup.

Hee Hee! Hope you all enjoyed!