Hello, Lovely Readers!
So can I just say once again how much I love Rob's self-deprecating humor?? Probably because of how often I do that myself. LOL
Well, it certainly felt odd not to post last weekend, but I took that time to do my best to make this weekends chapters killer for you all. I don't want to take up much time here because I know you're all anxious to find out where Bella and Edward are at now that their weekend has come to a close. But please be sure to read the A/N at the end. It has a few interesting little tidbits in it about the chapter and the story in general.
DISCLAIMER: The characters do not belong to me…they are all the creation of the wonderful Stephenie Meyer. All are human.
Surprise!
Bella's POV
"What is this place?" I asked, staring up at the massive house through the windshield.
"Well, remember how you said you would do anything…"
"Edward Anthony Cullen," I hissed at him. "Tell me you did not buy us a house."
"I did not buy us a house…I had one custom made for us."
"Without even talking to me?" I cried.
Edward looked stricken. "Of course I got your input. You just didn't know that you were telling me how to build you a house. I wrote down every word you said about what you wanted in a house and gave the notes to Jasper to design a place for us."
"But…How? You've been so busy with Charlie and me."
"Well, I had help. Emmett stopped by every afternoon after he got off of work and checked in with the crews to make sure everything was going fine. He's the reason the house is ready now."
"Emmett and Jasper both knew? Who else knows about this?" I asked. I was chanting in my head to remember that Edward loved me and it was the only reason he ever did stupid things like this.
Edward didn't really seem like he wanted to answer my question, but he did it anyway. "Well, now that you know, everyone knows."
"Cullen," I sighed, closing my eyes and leaning my head back. My fingers went to the bridge of my nose, imitating my husband's gesture when stressed.
"Please come and see the inside before you say anything."
I popped one eye open and looked over at him. He looked so nervous and I felt guilty for even being upset about this—I knew in my heart that he was just trying to be a good husband to me and father to Charlie. He'd wanted to get us a place of our own for over a year and would have too if I hadn't gotten pregnant. But I'd always assumed I would get to be involved in deciding where we lived because I planned to stay there for a very long time. I wanted Charlie to have fond memories of growing up in one place, just like Edward and I both had with our parents. I would just have to trust that Edward really had been able to design a house I would want.
"Alright, Cullen. Let's go see this house of yours."
"Our home, Bella," Edward corrected as he opened his door.
"You better damn well hope so," I muttered too low for him to hear as I got out of the car.
The front door was set inside of a square archway, matching the way the house seemed to be made of different squares put together. It had a wonderful modern look to it, and the sandy color of the stonework helped to make it even more my style. The doors and trim were deep, dark brown, calling attention to the windows of various sizes, all square again.
Edward slid the key into the right side of the double doors and then turned toward me. "Close your eyes," he instructed.
I tried not to be annoyed as I dutifully closed my eyes. When he told me I could open them, I found that he'd opened the double doors completely, giving me a full view of the large foyer. There was a window near the top of the ceiling and it flooded the area with light. I'd always told Edward that I wanted a house with tons of natural light, and so far, he was delivering.
"I've left all of the walls white so that you can pick whatever color you want. The floors are all either hardwood or tile, but we can put as many rugs into the house as you want," Edward said as he wrapped his arm around my waist and drew me into the house.
He pulled me to the right and showed me the first room of the downstairs. It was long and wide and the large window framed it nicely.
"This would be a great playroom for Charlie and all of his cousins," Edward said, his voice echoing slightly in the empty space.
When I didn't reply, he quickly moved us to the next room. It had small square windows that were framed with dark cherry wood, making them seem more like small pieces of art than windows. There was also a set of French doors leading out into the side yard.
"Our office," he announced. "I figured we could share it and that you could make one of the corners into a reading area for yourself."
I still didn't say anything, so we moved on to the kitchen. The countertops were granite, the cabinets were a soft red-brown, and every appliance and fixture was state-of-the-art. There was even a window in the corner, giving a beautiful view of the backyard. The floor was a soft cream colored tile and the ceiling had both recessed lighting and a small chandelier. This area was so big that there was plenty of room to put seating around the kitchen island and still have a full dining room table in here.
There was a set of French doors in this room as well, but these led out into the backyard. The doors were framed in a wall of windows, flooding the area with natural light. And as if that wasn't enough, there was a skylight to help give the area a glowing effect.
"What's this area supposed to be for?" I asked, speaking for the first time. There was a wall cutting it off from the rest of the kitchen and giving it a private feel while still being open.
"You've always said you wanted an open area with lots of light for my piano. I thought this would be a great spot. And we can set up your guitar in here as well, and places for Charlie and you to sit when you want to listen to me play. Or when he and I want to hear you play."
We headed upstairs and I was once again amazed at the all the different sizes of the windows and how the whole house seemed bright without being too open to the outdoors. Not that anyone could really look inside anyway since there wasn't a house close enough to this one to see from.
The first bedroom we came to was open and airy, with a small walk-in closet. So were the next two bedrooms that I saw. The bathroom had a long, low black sink countertop on a cabinet made of that same reddish wood that was in the kitchen, and right across from it was a second sink and a small vanity area. There wasn't a shower in the room, but there was a garden tub surrounded on three sides by windows. I could easily picture Charlie splashing around in that tub while watching the clouds and birds pass right outside the windows.
Our next stop was the master bedroom. It had a sitting area that was separate from the sleeping area, and featured French doors that opened up onto a cozy terrace. It looked just big enough for a small table and two chairs. The closet was a huge, double walk-in and even had room for a chair if we decided to put one in there. The master bathroom had a double vanity sitting atop an antique-style cabinet; it almost seemed more like a dresser than a bathroom cabinet. There was a beautiful claw-foot tub to bathe in, with a skylight located right above, and the shower was a beautiful dark tile with glass walls and a glass door, letting you see inside to the dual showerheads and the built-in bench.
I turned and crossed the room, stepping out of the French doors and onto the small terrace, surveying the backyard.
"What do you think?" Edward asked. Even with him trying to keep his voice low, there was no hiding the nervousness in it.
I turned to face him, but that just worried him more when he saw the tears in my ears.
"I'm sorry," he sighed, pulling me into his arms. "I really wanted to give you the home of your dreams."
"Then why are you sorry?" I asked, ignoring the tears leaking down my face.
"You're crying," he stated, looking confused.
"I'm crying because I don't know what else to do with myself. Edward, this truly is my dream home. It has everything I've ever wanted. It's bright and airy, it has tons of windows to show off the outdoors, and I could definitely see myself living my entire life right here."
He smiled and it was absolutely gorgeous to witness. "So you like it?"
"I love it," I corrected. "Thank you."
"Um…I honestly wasn't expecting to not have to argue. I'm not sure what to say."
"How about you hold off on saying anything and get me back to my son. I might love this house, but I'm still ticked at you for hiding an entire house from me."
"That's sort of the point of it being a surprise, Bella."
"A home should never be a surprise. It should be a discussion we have together."
"You're right," he sighed, looking sufficiently chastised for me.
"We can talk more about this later. Right now, I really want to see Charlie."
"Okay. I know you aren't ready to talk yet, but while you're thinking, would you also think about a timetable for moving in? I was sort of hoping we could get it done before the holidays. I was thinking it would be really nice to have the New Years Eve party here, for the whole family to come and see the new house."
"Later," was my only reply to him. I had a lot to think about and the last thing I needed was to even start to imagine what a move during the holidays would be like, especially since we would need furniture for every room in the house. We'd always planned on leaving the furniture we had now at Carlisle and Esme's for whenever we visited.
The ride to Emmett's was fairly silent, with only Edward's music playing. I appreciated that he was giving me space, giving me time to swallow his very large surprise. I loved the house; I really did. But it was hard to move past the feeling that it had been done behind my back. I knew it was just that stubbornly independent side of myself being selfish and that was my main reason for keeping quiet. I wanted to squash it and make it go away; it wanted to stay and convince me that Edward and I hadn't really connected at all this weekend.
As soon as we stepped into Emmett's house, I picked up my son and grabbed Rose, heading off to her room to talk in private.
"What's wrong, Bella?" she asked as I showered a giggling Charlie with kisses.
"Edward showed me his big surprise."
That seemed to be all I needed to say because Rose sat down next to me and hugged me tightly. "I tried to tell him that this was not the sort of thing to surprise you with. But you know, Edward. He just assumed I was referring to your normal hate of surprises and nothing else. Emmett wasn't any better. And if I hadn't felt so much like it wasn't my place to interfere, I would have told you myself. Alice and I both thought of telling you a few times, but you were already dealing with so much."
"Rose, I'm just…I left that hotel, feeling like I'd really connected with Edward again, that we were in the same place together. And now…I don't want to, but now I feel like he's left me behind again. He's gone off and planned a future without me."
"No, Honey. He just planned a house. That's all. And if you told him you hated that house, he would sell it and make sure you had so much input on the next one that you would get sick of his questions."
"The problem is that the house really is my dream home, Rosalie. It's everything I ever wanted in a house. And I'm worried that if I accept this and embrace it, Edward will take that as a cue to always leave me out of the decision making."
"Bella, I really think you're just reading into things because you're upset."
"And if I'm not?"
Rose moved so that we were looking at each other. "I think the best thing you can do for yourself, and your marriage, is to sit Edward down and explain exactly how you're feeling. Don't worry about hurting his feelings and just lay out exactly how this made you feel and what worries it created for you."
"I get why he did it today, but I really wish he wouldn't have," I sighed. "I wish I could pretend I didn't know and still feel that closeness I'd had when we left earlier."
"Bella, take it from me, you can't let every stupid thing your husband does make you feel like you're not connected to him. No matter what insane surprise Edward comes up with, you're still his wife and his partner, and if you truly don't like what he's done, he will fix it. But you have to tell him first."
"I will. I just want to spend a little time with Charlie first. Was he good?"
"He was a perfect angel," Rose replied, smiling at Charlie. "He's so sweet that he makes me want a little boy of my own."
"You could do that. You're an amazing mom."
"Yeah, but I don't think I'm quite ready for three kids," she chuckled. "I want Lily to be just a little older before I tackle pregnancy and midnight feedings again."
"Did he give you any trouble with his medicine?"
"None. But you have created a monster, Bells."
"What do you mean?" I asked, making faces at Charlie and getting him to laugh.
"Well, remember how you gave Charlie his first taste of real food at Thanksgiving?"
"Yeah?"
"I'm guessing Edward and you don't eat in front of Charlie."
"Not usually. Our schedules don't really match up for that."
"Well, he sat with us while we ate and he threw one major little hissy fit until we shared with him. This little man has tasted scrambled eggs, toast, peas, and macaroni and cheese. And he loved it all."
"What are you doing growing up when I'm not looking?" I asked Charlie, tickling his side and getting him to giggle. "Don't you know you're supposed to wait until I'm watching to do things like that?"
Charlie just continued to giggle.
"I have his bag all packed up for you since I figured you'd want to get him home and keep him all to yourself for a bit. I remember feeling that way the first time I left Lily with Edward and you."
"Thanks, Rosalie. Both for watching Charlie and for talking with me."
"You're my sister, Bella. I would do anything for you."
"And me for you," I promised, hugging her tightly.
I said my goodbyes to Emmett and Lily and then we left. I spent the ride home in the back with Charlie, holding on to his hand and talking to him. And when we got inside, I went straight upstairs to give Charlie a bath. I was sure Edward knew I was avoiding him on purpose and I just hoped he understood why. I needed to sort this out for myself before I could talk to him about it.
I spent the day with Charlie, playing with him and reading to him. I even took him for a walk in the backyard, bringing him to the hill that Edward and I loved to share. I hated that we were spending this time away after such a great weekend, but I was more afraid of what would happen if I went to him before I was ready. I tended to have a temper, much like my father and brother, and I didn't want it to get away from me at such a critical time in our life together.
By the time I had Charlie asleep in his own bed, I knew exactly what I wanted to say. I crossed the hall to our room, but found it empty. I listened closely and faintly heard piano music. I made my way down the darkened stairs, through the empty living room, and into Edward's music room.
He was sitting behind his piano, staring down at his hands—even sitting that way, you couldn't miss the scowl on his face. I battled with myself once again over whether I had a right to feel upset or if I was just being selfish; I was pretty sure it was a good mix of both.
"Edward."
His head sprung up and his green eyes immediately landed on me. "Is Charlie asleep?"
"Yes. I was hoping we could talk."
"Whatever you would like, Bella." He scooted over and patted his bench, inviting me to sit next to him.
I did sit down and then I played with the piano keys a little, stalling and making absolutely sure I had my thoughts in order. Edward's hand touched mine, gently pulling my fingers from the smooth ivory keys.
"I thought you wanted to talk," he said, his voice careful and reserved.
"I do want to talk. I want to start by saying once again that I do understand why you did what you did and what you were hoping to accomplish. But, Edward, I need you to understand how it made me feel. I have struggled all along with wanting to feel like your equal in this relationship, and even though you don't mean it, every time you leave me out of a decision, you leave me feeling like you don't trust me to have a good opinion, a worthy opinion."
He opened his mouth and I quickly lifted my hand, not wanting to lose my train of thought.
"Like I said, I know you don't mean it that way. But I feel that way and I need you to understand that. I feel like if I accept the house whole-heartedly, you'll take it that it's okay to leave me out of such big decisions since you're always so sure of what I want. And maybe you never would have taken it that way, but that's not something I'm willing to risk. You have to understand the difference between surprising me and leaving me out. You left me out with the house, Edward. Yes, you did a great job of getting my ideas without me knowing, but it would have meant so much more to me if you would've involved me in the process. I would have loved to watch Jasper come up with the blueprints for the house, and to help you pick out the colors for the flooring and fixtures in the house. This could have been something we did together, Edward, but you cut me out of it. With that said, I want to thank you again for trying to do what you thought was right and best. I realize that this was your way of taking care of your family. I just hope you'll never do this again."
"I won't," Edward promised as he pulled me into his arms, hugging me tightly. "I'll involve you so much that you get sick of it and beg me to leave you alone. I'm so sorry that I hurt your feelings, Bella. That was never my intention. I was only trying to make one of your dreams come true for you."
"I know. Just…just let me have a little bit of involvement with those dreams, okay?"
"I promise."
"Come on, Cullen. Let's go check on our little man and then get some sleep," I said, tugging on his hand. "You've got work tomorrow."
"Yes, I do," he sighed. "I wish I hadn't messed up with you today. I'd really been looking forward to spending the whole day with Charlie and you."
"We'll have tomorrow afternoon together, when you get home from work. And we'll have the Christmas break as well."
"Speaking of the break…Have you decided if you're going back to work in the spring semester?"
"I think that with us having a brand new house, and the mortgage and start-up costs that go with it, I really should go back to work. I'm going to ask for my classes to only be Tuesday-Thursday ones, but I doubt I'll get that. There are a lot of teachers who have been there much longer than me."
"You could stay home, Bella. You know we don't really need the money."
"Edward, your money isn't endless and we need to make sure we have plenty to leave Charlie if anything should ever happen to us. Besides, we also have a college fund to fill up for our little man."
"What will we do with Charlie while we're at work?"
"Well, I was thinking I would ask Rose if she would watch him, for a fee of course. She's been so great with Lily and I think Charlie would learn a lot from staying with his aunt and cousin."
We stopped talking as we walked into Charlie's room, not wanting to wake our little man. We spent a few minutes standing in front of his crib, just looking at the little miracle we had brought into the world, before finally going into our room.
Edward shut the door part of the way, but I had other plans for us. "Edward, close it all the way," I told him. "We have the baby monitor on if he wakes."
He obeyed, but looked confused and a little wary as he crossed the room and followed me into the closet. "Why did I shut it?"
"Because I want some time alone with my husband," I replied, pulling out my pajamas. "I want you to make me forget all about feeling left out."
He smiled and leaned forward, pressing his lips to my forehead. "I would really like the opportunity to show you."
"Just know that if you wake my baby by being too loud, I'm so going to enjoy kicking your ass, Cullen."
Edward laughed and wrapped me up in his arms, swaying me a little. "There's the feisty girl that completely turned my world upside down. Should I get you some soda and Twizzlers?"
"Only if you want me laughing."
"I think I'd much rather have you moaning," he whispered against my ear.
"I think I'd rather that, too," I managed to reply. My words were immediately followed by a wonderful kiss, which quickly turned into a needy kiss, and eventually ended in make-up sex. We'd only partaken of this particular version a few times in our years together, and as much as I hated fighting with Edward, I loved his way of making it up to me. And just to make sure it was perfect, Edward promised once again to never leave me out of any decisions. I really hoped he could stick to that promise.
Okay, before anyone hits the review button, remember this...Bella isn't upset so much about the house, as she is that she was completely left out of it. She does understand Edward had good intentions and that is exactly why she gave herself some space to calm down. That shows just how much all of her experiences have matured her. Old Bella would have ranted and railed and maybe even bit him! LOL
Next thing...As if she didn't have enough with Charlie and Edward, Bella got my dream house. The one described above is real and it's absolutely gorgeous. If I had Cullen money, I would buy it in a heartbeat. But alas, I just have a regular, boring day job. LOL
Our Little Man is up for "Best Alternate Universe" over at The Lion and Lamb Awards. I'm up against some great competition, like my good buddy Bronze. And! I'm very excited for this one, my good friend Velvet Blood Roses is up for "Best Vampire Bella" for her masterpiece, Primal Desires. Nominations end today, so voting should be starting soon. The link is up on my profile pages. Even if you aren't in a voting mood, it's a great way to find lots of good fanfic stories to read.
That's it for me!! Next chapter will jump ahead a bit and the boys will be babysitting all by themselves! Hee hee.