Cursed Sword

by Kneenaw

Cursed: that is the only word that can describe the young life of Emiya Shirou. Losing even the memory of his original family to the great fire, Shirou must find a new life with a father as lost as he is, a twisted mother, and a wacky older sister.

7. Act one Interlude One: Sisters

I don't own anything related to Fate/stay night; this is a work of parody.

Act One, Interlude One: Sisters.

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Trespassing 2 (Music) /nXnRjzVzB4c

You take away a child's family, their house, their friends; what is left to signify their life?

The girl in the mirror must be such a case.

In the mirror was a strange pair, an out-of-place blonde foreigner with a long light blue dress and a red-haired girl with a poor face, sad and pitiful, wearing something akin to rags.

'At least I'm not as bad as she is.' No matter what has happened to me, I hoped never to fall that low.

'Who are you?' Who could make such a face?

"hahaha..." I mean, come on? How could I not giggle at this girl?

We passed the pair and turned down another hall, the long stretch to the red exit sign.

Deftly passing through the crowd of assorted people, I was softly pulled out into the red town.

It was only when we were finally out in the fresh air outside that I began to understand.

'Oh... It was me.' It wasn't exactly a mystery; who else had the same face? The same hair?

The girl in the mirror just didn't appear like I wanted her to be. She's supposed to be Nii-san's bubbly partner in crime.

'Speaking of Shirou, where is he?'

Usually, when I'm scared, I go find him, and it's all better, but instead, I'm with a weird blue woman.

"Ugh..." My right hand being pulled along, I put my left onto my pulsing forehead.

'My head hurts...' how much had I slept while I was in that room...?

...what had I been doing these last few days? It's midday... I'm way late for school.

I had stopped in thought long enough that the weird woman I was following took notice.

"Come, we're leaving. You'll have plenty of rest soon." A voice that allowed no disagreement, even if her Japanese had a bit of an accent.

She pulled me along without waiting for an answer. She was a stranger, but there was no other path to take; a part of me recognized her as trustworthy.

She wasn't lying either. The walking ended when she picked me up and put me in the front seat of her car. I'd always had a car seat in the back before now.

She must know what's right, though; she's a pretty adult, they always know best.

I always wanted to be in the front… But it doesn't feel good. It feels empty like it's missing what I wanted out of it. It was an emptiness that went far past just sitting in the front seat, but that's not something I wanted to think about.

We were off, driving a bit fast across the city. The winter scene of Fuyuki was somber, cold, intolerant of any wish to at least appreciate its beauty for a final time. Perfectly fine with leaving me in disgrace.

The car became a big hall with lots of people in suits running around. The people scared me, so I moved closer to the blue lady, almost fully hiding in her skirt.

She was probably annoyed by me, but she didn't stop me or say anything at all.

'She's weird….'

Moving through the big mall, we eventually entered into a weird... train?

'Wait... I think I know what it is... an airplane!' Yes, I remember from school; this is definitely an airplane.

But why would we get on one of those? I didn't speak up. I had no energy left for that.

After we passed the tall captain, the blue woman beckoned me.

"Now sit, girl. It's going to be a long trip, so get comfortable."

"Okay..." We sat across from each other in comfortable chairs. There was nobody but us in here.

She silently wrote as the vibrations got loader and loader. And as the plane started to move, she didn't bat an eye at anything.

Only when we were high into the air and stable did she begin to talk.

"I know you must be nervous, going off with a stranger like me, but there is no need, trust me this."

"..." I wanted to talk, but the effort required was more than the energy that remained.

"Can you not respond, girl?"

"..."

"I see, you must be exhausted... I'll give you what you need."

She got herself up and walked next to my seat. Pulling back the sleeve of her shoulder, baring something that shouldn't be there: a glowing symbol on her shoulder that. But even that strange sight didn't arouse my interest. My mind had long since stopped caring about much of anything.

"I'm just going to put you into a nice deep sleep, so you'll be all ready when we arrive, ok?"

I nodded; the last vestiges of my understanding consented.

"Schlaf im schatten, brücke dich zum himmel!" Her strange words echo in my head and I start feeling really cold.

(Music Stop)

It was like being put under ice; even my mind fell to paralysis, bringing me out of the real world and into one meant for me.

The blackness that awaited me there was not so kind as the blue woman. It was the disaster that waited in that darkness that held me in its grip.

Of course, I dreamt of that day. There was fire but no light. It was all just shades of grey, with one exception, that beautiful red beside me.

It was my brother: Shirou, the person who always protected me. But he seemed far away now. His eyes reflected the world as it should be, all shades of red.

But even still, it was all grey and tranquil. Why do we see the same thing in such different ways?

But no matter how you see something, it doesn't change what is. And what is, is a burning field, here to snuff us out.

Whoosh, the great winds brought the silent fire and swept us away in opposite directions.

"Ahhhh!" It hurts!

It's a pain you can live through, scarred... but alive. It wasn't that that made my heart fall. It was the loss.

A squall pushed us in different directions, as were kid apples by the wind.

'Agh, Shirou! where are you!' I screamed with no voice.

'What is this?' Finally, I remembered what I tried so hard to forget.

Everyone had burned away; Dad was ash. Mom had survived with a living body but a doomed soul.

'But I could change it! Shirou's right there!'

I crawled, hand and knees fighting through the scalding breath of the colorless flame. The squall threatened to push him away.

'Almost there!' I yelled out, But he didn't move, as if there was no pilot to his body.

As I scraped my body forward, I saw it...

A black sun that seemed unholy even to the shadows. And Shirou was being drawn right into it.

Right on the edge, I made my move.

'Ach!" I jumped myself forward and held his limp arm just on the point of no return.

'I've got you!' But I could pull him back with me.

'just don't let go!' you're supposed to be the strong one!

Why is he not helping! He still breathed. His eyes were open! Had he given up?

My nails scraped across his arm as I tried to grasp onto him, but it was like the wind was getting noted that we hadn't been separated yet.

Save or follow him, as long as we weren't separated. I just don't want to be alone, and I didn't care if we would both fade away, as long as it was together.

"Hold on... errrrrrrr!" I held onto his fingers and yelled as I mustered that should be strength impossible for a child.

Yet... these hands could no longer hold anything...

So I lost my grip and watched as he disappeared lifelessly into the black sun.

"Nooooooo!"

'I had him! I could have changed everything. If I were a bit stronger, I could have saved him! I was given this second chance, and I blew it!"

'Wait! Don't go! Please, I just don't want to. be alone!'

But the more I pushed against the wind towards the blacks sun, the more it seemed to want to get rid of me.

'Ahhhhhhh!' I pushed myself until the wind became enough to push me over.

No ground caught me, I just kept falling, or maybe it was that whole world was rising so it could leave me too.

I fell until nothing remained of the black sun, or any trace of the idea that Shirou had once been my brother.

The black sun had won. It had taken Shirou and left me entirely alone.

'Who did it? Who did it? Who did it!?'

I was alone again, stuck in dank darkness.

'Who was the one?' what was the cause?

I would find that person, no-monster, I would find them, and I would take from them what had been taken from me. Then, I would exact my revenge, no matter how long it took, no matter how much effort, I would allow myself this one selfish wish.

But the face that reflected at me from the shadows showed that it was pointless.

It was a disgusting face, full of malice and completely lacking in human empathy; It was my face.

'I see...' The rage and sorrow seemed to disappear; I didn't have the right to feel that way after all.

Many things made sense now; it was clear who the monster was. It's just unfortunate no one figured it out before it was too late.

A cruel life, that's what had led me to this. I wonder how many other kids out there felt the same way I do now.

I think I know what really happened that day; it's fuzzy in my mind, and thinking about it too hard just gives me a headache. I probably killed my parents, and I probably killed Shirou.

I didn't blame the black sun, even if it did start the fire or took Shirou away from me. I mean... they were just trying to get away from me, that's it.

Everyone in the fire just wanted to get as far away from me as possible, because they could never be happy while I was there. That's why Shirou didn't resist; he was happy to be taken away.

'Hahahahahaha! Isn't it simple?'

These thoughts... I couldn't help but indulge in them.

It was just so hot in the closet, and so dark... I knew it wasn't right to stay there, I knew, but I stayed anyway. It was loud and scary out, so I waited, and right as I passed out, someone came and saved me.

The life of Katarina Saijo didn't come to an end, but the process of survival was cruel, taking everything that made her a person as compensation.

I had her name, Katarina Saijo, that was me.

But without a family, a name means nothing, and without a name, a person is just an empty husk.

Still... despite all this, I can only continue on. I would give it my all for a little while longer, at least.

After all, Mommy would be mad at me if I didn't keep my promise. So I don't want to disappoint her any more than I already have.

'If I lived when they died... Then I just have to take their place myself!' Warmth started to pool into me, warm blood thawing my frozen body.

What did Dad always say again...?

'...that's right! 'You only truly fail when you give up..." so as long as I never give up... then surely one day I can get everything I wish for!'

(Music Stop)

As my mind began to rouse itself, this final thought was the only one that I would consciously remember experiencing in that dismal nightmare.

"Irwakkaræn!" It was not a loud voice, but the power of it seemed to go beyond simply waking me.

.Crack The words cut through the numbness, like the ice that had enveloped the whole world had finally shattered.

"Ahhhhha" I took a big breath, bringing with it all the feelings I had ignored. For one, it's cold out. What I'm wearing is so inadequate. It was also loud like we were in a really loud bus.

"Ohhhhhha." I yawned and moved my arms around as I opened and closed my eyes. I had slept in a big chair reclined far back.

My body was much softer than it felt before. The hospital robes that I had worn coming her had somehow transformed into a light red dress, after so long barely wearing anything, it felt nice yet strange with real clothes again.

The End of Reminiscence. (Music) /YJhC70dPN2Y

"Your awake then. I hope you slept peacefully." I didn't quite remember the dream, but my heart's sweat and beating suggested that it hadn't been enjoyable.

"Sorry..." Those bad feelings inside me made me want to apologize.

"I was the one to put you to sleep; no need to apologize... May I ask you some questions? We still have time until we land."

"Ok."

She glanced at her notebook one last time before slowly asking her questions.

"Just to confirm, you are truly Katarina Saijo?"

"Ohh, um, yes." She marked off something in her notes and continued.

"That's good; you'd be surprised by how easy it is to confuse children."

"..." I guess...

"Listen, from this day forth, I've decided to take you on as my charge. That makes me your guardian. This is not something that I am taking lightly, so I expect you to live up to certain expectations."

"Yes... er, Oba-Sama?" I didn't remember her name, so I just called her that.

"Oba...Sama? My Japanese is a bit rusty, but from what I can remember, that means... old lady, correct? Katarina... never call me that again. Call me Mrs. Edelfelt." She seemed sincerely offended by that comment.

"Sowwy, I won't say it again... please just don't throw away... I'll call you whatever you want." My voice broke as I started to fear what could happen to me.

"Katarina... I see... that was was... err, mean of me, wasn't it? forgive me; I'm not mad at you." She seemed uncomfortable when faced with a panicking child.

"... Sowwy."

"More apologies? Listen, give only a single apology or, even better, tell someone: thank you." I didn't feel like being thankful to anyone.

"...Sorry for... apologizing so much." Now she was just sighing.

"Hah... I shouldn't expect you to take my lessons to heart so easily, I guess. You are only six after all... you'll need some time to acclimate to your new home, but I'd like to think you'll catch up eventually."

"Catch up?"

"Yes, I was going to wait until we were home but considering we have this time to talk, I might as well tell you: I have two daughters of myself that you will be living and learning together with, fortunately, you are all about the same age, surely God is looking out for us on that point."

"Is that for... you know... magic?"

"Yes... now, what do you know of magic?" her eyes were sharper than they were before.

"Awww, well, umm... you cast spells, right? But I've never actually seen one. Mom just said that I was going to have to learn, that means you know magic, like a magician, right?" She looked me in the eyes for a few seconds as if I had stolen a cookie.

"Haaah..." sighing deeply, she put her hands to her face and let out a weak smile.

"Did... I do something wrong again?"

"No... just refer to it as magus from now on, alright?" She sighed deeply in disappointment.

"Ok." Magus, not 'magician,' true it sounds a little cooler.

"Listen, Magecraft is going to be a long journey for you. Any longer and you may have started to experience circuit atrophy. All I can offer is my teachings. Of course, you can't inherit my family's magic, but I don't think you'd be attuned to it anyway. All I ask for in return is your obedience, is that alright?" I try to follow along, but I didn't know what she was talking about until the end.

"That's fine." I think I'll follow this woman; she's the only one who can give me what I need.

"I understand a great many things now... Your Mother came to her senses in the end, if only... she hadn't made such horrible mistakes in the first place."

"Did... Did mom really make a mistake like that? Mom was so nice and smart; I think you're wrong." I came with a little anger, but she just smiled a sad smile and held my hand.

"I don't hold it against you in believing that family is so important, and if we all had the trust and love that you have for your Mother, then many... poor situations could have been avoided. But, take this from my personal experience, you may love your Mother... but that doesn't mean she didn't make mistakes of her own. I knew Elza for many years, and I had a Mother who made a horrible mistake herself, so I understand how you feel... but as survivors, we are the ones who must live on. And we are the ones in the end who suffer the most."

"Mom... you knew her?"

"Correct, we were unlikely friends, but it just so turned out that the two of us ended up becoming allies, perhaps the only real friend I ever had." She spoke softly with eyes that looked far away.

"In fact, I met your brother a few times. Your Mother was so worried about him that she came to me to look at him."

"You know Shirou? Did you find him?!" The last small flicker of hope comes to the surface.

"No, that was before... I'm sorry, from what I have gathered, he did not survive... "

"Yeah, I know..." I don't know why I got my hopes up at all. I wish I could just not care about anything.

"It's unfortunate what happened to him. Children do not deserve to be put in such a horrid situation. I lost my sister too when I was younger, not as young as you, but... the best thing you can do is to live on for them, succeed in their place." She lost someone too...

"Why is there so much death in this world?"

"You ask a difficult question to answer... one that your Mother and I disagreed on. Back in the day, your Mother and I went across Africa, doing the work that normal mages would never do. But, in the end, she couldn't handle it; she always was a kind soul..."

"You were ... Superheroes?"

"Haha, I think we fashioned ourselves that at the time... " She looked into the plane window with a faraway look.

"..." I could only look at this woman with wide eyes, she's my savior, so I guess that does make her a hero.

"... I guess it was a matter of how much we were willing to bloody our own hands, if I'm saying that right."

"What do you mean... your hands would be bloody, were you hurt?"

"Listen, Katarina. Death is unavoidable as a mage; you will walk with it and respect its presence. Your Mother was unwilling to accept her responsibility in that she didn't want to profit from the suffering of others even if she could have done great things with it... And this is the result, she didn't respect death, and this was her punishment. I was correct in the end, but all I have is a poor taste in my mouth."

So it was all mom's fault then...? Was God punishing her, or had a monster so evil shown up that even he couldn't protect us?

"You're right too Elza, I'm as soft as you..." looking at me intently, coming to a conclusion of her own.

"I'm adopting you, you will retain your name... for now..., so tell me, why do you want to learn magic?"

"I want to be strong... so I can stop that fire. If it ever came back, I could stop it myself..." She looked a little disappointed by my answer.

"I can do that for you; Magic will bring you power beyond your imagination. All I ask is your compliance."

"Yes... I need that." I need to be strong.

"You're a lot like mommy was."

"Hmm, How so?"

"Uhh, well... you're beautiful... and really smart and kind and cool and beautiful."

"Hahahaha, you are a natural flatterer, you didn't say anything I didn't know already, but it certainly confirms you have a good head on your shoulders. If only my daughters shared your appreciation." She mumbled the last part.

"..." Thanks...

Silence reigned for a while, but something was bugging me...

"..."

"...Is there something on your mind Katarina?." The fact that Henrietta was a mommy too made it easy for her to see through me.

"Well... why are you taking me in? I'm just a useless child..." after all, the only one left to blame is me.

"First of all, I never want to hear those words from you ever again, If you were useless. I really would have left you in that hospital. But to answer your question, I am doing this because your Mother asked me to."

"Mom did...? when did that happen?" It was only yesterday that I was in the hospital watching mom's lifeless body, but the memories were already hazy and unclear.

"Did you not see her write a letter? it was... a disturbing thing to receive, to be sure."

"Letter... letter... yeah, I remember that was when she woke up for a little while before she got all quiet."

"Yes, that must have been the one... you... hmm, how can I say this? You were with her all that time until I arrived, or am I wrong?"

"Yup, I never left her side, not when she was sleeping and even when she started to smell bad. You know those doctors just let her decay like that; they pretended like she wasn't even there..."

"I see... I can... not blame you for what you did then. You don't know any better... Even still, I simply don't understand how you could have taken it; for a week, you looked over the dead body of your own Mother... I couldn't bear to see her like that for a second."

"All I can do for you now is take care of your future. I can be a Mother to you, but you cannot be my daughter... "

"Huh? what do you mean?"

"I'm sorry, it's just that I can't take full responsibility for you when I have my own daughters to rear myself. Much of that work falls on me, as my husband is... busy. I can not always be there for you; you will have to find your own way through many things without my assistance."

"No... it's alright." Even though Henrieta had her own family, she was still willing to take me in nonetheless. And now she was guilty that she couldn't

"You've done... so much for me already, so I will help you too."

"That sounds great, Katarina. I think that I made the right choice in taking you in."

"Thank you." A sense of satisfaction filled me, and I felt like I was fortunate to be given this second chance in life.

(Music Stop)

There wasn't much more to say after that. When we landed on the ground, I found myself in a place that looked wholly different from home.

As we left, I latched onto her long dress and followed her brisk pace without complaint.

Reaching the terminal, the people here looked so different than what I was used to.

'Is this Europe?' on mom's side, I was a quarter German, I had the natural red hair to prove it, so I guess it was not that different.

'But still... there are so many blonde people here. I wonder if they see me as strange here as we see them at home.'

Walking out through the door, I saw a big sign with German characters, like how mom would write.

I could try to spell out the sound. I'm not a dummy; I know that much.

"(He-ru-sin-ki airu-po-ro-to.)" I spelled it out allowed, but that didn't give me any understanding of where this was.

'(Helsinki Airport)? A city with two names?'

"Do you understand what that means, Katarina?" Mrs. Edelfelt has stopped too out in the cold air as cars came and went in the cold winter air.

"Err, No... Sorry." It really was cold here...

"This is Helsinki, the capital of Finland."

"I see..." Finland must be a part of Germany or something.

"We didn't wait long In the cold before a really pretty old car parked right in front of us."

An older man with grey hair and deep blue eyes came out to greet us. He was tall and muscular.

"I apologize for the wait, Mistress Edelfelt; the young mistress you left in charge had been very... needy."

"Hah, I'm sure that I've been missed. If they can't handle a day alone, then maybe I should distance myself more often." What are they talking about?

"Now, Ilmarinen, take the day off, explore the town; I'll be driving home myself."

"(Of course, Mistress Edelfelt, thank you for your kindness)." After that, the old man walked off without regarding me at all.

Car keys in her hands, she kneeled and spoke to me in a kind voice that didn't really suit her.

"Alright, This is your final chance; what's your choice? try your hand as an orphan or come with me and reach places you could never imagine."

'Mom... and Papa... and Nii-san are all gone. I don't want to lose anymore...'

My body answered before my mind. My hand was tugging on her long blue dress, refusing to let her leave me.

"Please don't go..."

"This is Finland, but we still have a ways to go until we reach my home; I'm sure you'll love it there."

"Your home... what's it like?" I imagined my own house but with more blue.

"Haha, it will be better for you to see it for yourself. I'm sure you won't be disappointed. It's really the one thing that family has never lost, though compared to other magus families, our home is not yet the greatest; we are working on that.

"Okay." I definitely wanted to see the place I was going to be living in from now on.

The scenery was different from home; so many little lakes and streams dotted the landscape. Tall green trees lined along the road, and more often than not, there wasn't a house in sight.

We quietly drove for about two hours before exiting the big road onto a little one leading farther and farther into the woods.

Over, behind it held a house so big I think it rivaled the school back home.

Though it was more like a bunch of buildings next to each other.

"Here we are, Katarina; I apologize preemptively. Our home is only twenty-seventh in size amongst the homes of Magi, though one day we'll be first."

If this were twenty-seventh, I'd like to see number one...

"Oh! There they are, all interested in the new arrival I see." She pointed at the middle door that seemed to be the big entrance.

Standing on the steps was a small girl in a matching blue dress to Mrs. Edelfelt. I think there was another blue thing there, but whatever it was, It didn't seem to want to be seen.

Stopping in front of the marble stairs, at the big pebble drive that surrounds a pretty fountain, Mrs. Edelfelt beckoned me out.

"Alright, Katarina, no need to be shy. Go introduce yourself." She smiled as if it was a kind gesture, but for some reason, this small interaction gave me dread.

"Alright..." It's impolite not to introduce yourself. Dad said that once at the playground.

I was a little scared now, but I knew it was a bit late for that. Henrietta seemed like a good adult, and I had already left Japan; there was nowhere to go but with her now.

"Uhh, I like your dress."

"My mom does too." She spoke with the same accent as Henrietta, but surprisingly she was

She pointed at the simple red dress I had on, "You look okay too, but mine is better; it is blue."

"So?"

"Blue is the best color. Red is for babies."

"I still like mine." I think blue is for babies, but I didn't want to fight about it, so I kept silent.

"Yeah... it's fine." I looked away, searching for Mrs. Edelfelt, but when I did, the blue girl walked right up to me.

The girl was looking all over my body like I was a new toy of hers.

"Uhh, what is your name?"

"Well, I am proud to announce that my name is Luviagelita Edelfelt, but everyone calls me Luvia, except mom, I guess." She held her hands to her sides and puffed out her chest. She seemed like the sort of girl who was proud to give her name whenever possible.

The girl looked confused for a minute until suddenly her eyes went wide, and she hugged me out of nowhere.

"Well, my name is Katarina Saijo. Nice to meet you."

"Yeah, I know that; Mom made a big fuss about it and ran across the whole world to go get you. I worked really hard to get my Japanese ready. It's good, right?."

"Yeah, you sound good." She sounded almost like a natural speaker.

When she heard that, she went and hugged me, my reaction so slow that I didn't even move.

"What?" I didn't know why this girl was hugging me all of a sudden.

"I just wanted to give you a hug; thanks for saying that." she explained.

"Hmm... you are nice." she tightened up around me and refused to let go.

"...?"

"I like you."

"What? Oh, thanks..." Embarrassed a little, I looked past her and saw Mrs. Edelfelt and something small and blue behind her.

Shirou used to give hugs all the time; it hurt to think I would never be able to hug anyone from my family ever again.

Maybe that's why I didn't want to let go. I was afraid of losing even a stranger's touch.

She held me tight like I was a stuffed animal.

"Mine." She snuggled up to me and threaded her fingers through my hair.

"Red hair... that's cool too..." No, I think that she really does see me as a new toy...

'But that's alright... I'll do anything it takes to stay here.'

Her arms reached, encompassing my back. She had complete control. She linked her hands around and picked me right up.

'Ughh.' The air left me as she demonstrated her strength, holding my entire body up.

"Now, now, Luvia put her down this instant." Putting me down, Luvia pouted but complied with her Mother.

Now back on my own two feet and out of her arms, I saw Luvia in a new light.

She was definitely not just any normal kid. To describe it in a single word... it would probably be 'perfect.' She seemed much bigger than what her age probably is.

'She's a lot stronger than me than me...' She wasn't that taller than me, but she had strength that definitely went beyond a normal kid's.

"I apologize for my daughter's behavior, Katarina. She's seen a bit too many of those horrid wrestling shows; she can get a little too excited sometimes."

"It's okay. Nii-san used to give me hugs all the time." Henrietta

"...I see." Henrietta quietly responded.

"Niisan... car, right?" Luvia spoke confused in her broken Japanese.

"No, not Nissan, nii-san is... uh..." I don't know what it is in her language...

"(It's the word for brother, Luvia.)." Henrietta seemed to clear up the confusion.

"Oh, then you have a brother; where is he? The only boy I know is Dad, and I guess Ilimarinen, but that doesn't count. I've always wanted to talk to a boy."

"Shirou... Nii-san is... not... ." All of a sudden, my head felt light, and the world seemed all hazy.

'Nii-san? Where did he go again?'

My throat tightens up as I acknowledged that I wasn't going to see him ever again.

"Waaaaah!" It was like my heart started beating again, as of I had died with Mom, but now I was born anew.

"Sniff, aah! I'm sorry... I'm so sorry... " My breathing strained as snot and tears flew freely across my face.

'I wanna go home, I want Mom, I want Dad, I want Shirou!' but little crybabies don't get what they want.

'I know that! I know, yet I can't control it!

Luvia awkwardly moved back from me, retreating to the vicinity of her Mother.

"(Err, did I do something wrong, Mom?)." I could hear them talking about me, but I didn't understand their language. They were probably regretting taking in broken goods.

"(No... it wasn't you, Luviagelita. I know I've taught you not to be a crybaby, but... there are times where it's... unavoidable.)."

I felt Luvia come near, but there was no embrace this time; she kept her distance.

'That's right... they should keep their distance.'

Everyone close to me will sooner or later be taken away. The dream was right; eventually, everyone around me will be pulled into the shadows.

But despite knowing this... I'm selfish... I want to stay, I want to be protected, I want to go on and succeed as Mom told me to.

"Why are you sad?" She probably is tired of me now that she can see I'm not just some new toy.

"Sniffle, sowwy..." If they see, I'm just a crybaby they're going to put me in an orphanage. I can't do this.

"Whatever it is... I promise to you; I will make this right."

"...Really?" how could she do it?

"If your brother is gone... then how about I become your sister?." If only it were that easy.

"Really? sob, you'd do that?"

"Yup, I'm already a big sis, so having another one sounds even more fun."

Behind Henrietta stood another girl, closer to my small size and with the same blond colored hair as everyone around here.

Was she the blue blur I saw earlier on the stairs?

"I... I am... sniffle... Katarina." Still a mess, I tried to introduce myself to this new person.

"(Suvianna, be a polite young lady and introduce yourself, she'll be your fellow student in magic from now on after all)."

"(Ok... Mom.)" I could tell her nervousness despite the communication barrier.

"Ko-ni-ch-iwa, my name is... Suvianna Edelfelt, but... call me Suvia yoroshi-ku...onegaishimasu." She spoke in a fragmented Japanese that made Luvia look amazing in comparison, but she was incredible compared to my ability in English.

"Yes... me too." Henrietta patted her back softy.

For some reason, she held out her hand, "(Friends?)" She said something in her language that I didn't understand.

I held out my hand too, but by then, it was too late she had retracted hers, for whatever reason. Well, I'm sure it doesn't really matter...

Mrs. Edlefelt looked over the three of us and beckoned us inside the place that would be my new home.

"Now that we are all introduced. Why don't we get going? There are many things that we need to speak of."

"Ok!" Though the Saijo name would remain, I had already lost any chance that it could ever be recovered.

'I'm sorry, Mom, Dad, Nii-san... I don't think I'll ever find you now...'

---

*Three and a Half Years Later*

Edelfelt Complex, Island of Väisälänsaari, Finland.

The door of Truth (Music) /kDU0Auyc-Zo

"Now, Suvianna, why are magi weaker now than they were in the past?" Mother spoke in her composed teaching voice. English had become my main language since I had arrived here.

Eagerly standing up, Suvia gave her answer in her preferred haughty voice.

"Magic has been in decline as civilization innovates technology that makes some magecraft obsolete or useless."

That sounds about right.

"A partial answer but not there is more to it than just that. Luvia, tell me, what has the recent decline in circuit quantity for many of the great families in recent generations show us?"

She doesn't bow as we would in Japan. However, she still excuses a respectful and refined aura, "Yes, Mother, certainly, many long lineages in the last years have been dying out or have had their magical circuit quantity collapse in recent generations, but that doesn't mean magic society is collapsing. On the contrary, one must remember that there is a new one rising in its magical ability for each family in decay. Though there is a lack of research as to whether the rate of circuits, in general, is in a net decline of incline." Not hesitating for a second as she explains it perfectly, Luvia is amazing as usual.

"Excellent Luvia, now Katarina, why is this issue not being comprehensively researched by the clock tower."

'Agh... my turn.'

"Well...err, the conservative and neutral factions they, uh, don't like to talk about it." Even With three years of intense English and Finnish lessons, I still struggled to speak at their level, especially when they were constantly using big words.

"That's correct, Katarina but you took too long in answering again, Luvia, give Suvianna and Katarina some English lessons again tonight." She calmly gave me a death sentence.

"Yes, Mother." Luvia spoke calmly; she's never minded having to teach me when I m not up to par. She's truly an angel in devil's clothing.

Suvia, on the other hand, was the opposite.

I didn't need to look at her to feel her burning annoyance. Literally, I think she was using one of her little fire cantraps to burn my back.

"Nnnnnnnngh..." I clenched my teeth as my eyes water a little in pain.

It was like getting pinched tough butt you check there and nothing was there, just a tiny mark that no one would take you seriously for if you complained. It's not the first circle on my back, nor would it be the last considering I was always holding them back.

"Something the matter Katarina?" Mother doesn't know about what Suvia does, but she always senses when something is off with me.

"No, Mother. I am alright." The best fake smile I can manage comes on my face, not quite as good as Luvia's but definitely high standard amongst the average kid.

I didn't want to cause a scene, after all... If she had to pick between the two of us in this household, she would obviously support... and it wasn't me.

I've gotten good at hiding it. Suvia wants to make me squirm, so I won't give her the satisfaction.

Another day, another class, The main subject was magic, and the only teacher: Henrietta, but we all called her 'Mother' or rarely 'mom'.

We did martial arts too, but that was supplementary.

Luvia and Suvia's Daddy lives in London, but we were told that he's actually going to move here with us soon.

He comes over from time to time, but I've never spoken with him, though you'd think Suvia was a different person when he's around.

She pretends to be such a sweet little girl so well that I almost believe it, but I have enough marks on my back to prove otherwise.

To be honest... I'm scared of him, 'what if he doesn't like me? What if he thinks I should just be sent away?'. It's not like I could ask them. That would just I've them the idea. So I suffer in silence, fearing that one day soon I'll be sent off.

It will happen. Eventually, things will change, but... I don't like it. I'd rather suffer in silence to maintain a modicum of security here than try and change for the better but have the chance of losing it all.

I really, really didn't want to lose anything I had gained here. Even if Suvia was a big meanie, I still wanted to get along with her one day, if only I could understand how to become at least friendly.

Henrietta was like a Mother to me. At this point, she pretty much was, just not officially.

If she hadn't come and saved me, I do not doubt that I would have followed Mom into death.

Then there was Luvia... and the thought of losing her made me cry, and I didn't even consider myself a crybaby so much anymore. She was my sister, we may not share the same last name, but we treat each other as real siblings do.

Finally, Leaving the Edelfelt workshop, we walked across the beautiful yard in our matching azure dresses. One of the few times a ceasefire between us is in the dressing room in the morning. The three of us work hand in hand to make one another as elegant as possible. I definitely feel classy, wearing such fancy and beautiful clothing; the only problem is that I feel like an imposter. Like I'm just a sad, poor girl trying to play at being rich and happy, and If they ever found out what I really am...

I was treated excellently by the servants, and even if my relationship with the Edelfelt sisters had its ups and downs, they were the closest thing I had, resembling a family.

I guess I just can't get over the fact that I lived when Shirou died.

But if there is one lesson I understand in the short time I've lived, it's that a good thing exists only to be taken away when you least expect it...

That night when I was walking to Luvia's room back from the garden, I heard words I was most afraid of. I hid past the corner and heard Mother and... was that Suvia? Her voice was a little off, though.

Their voices were loud enough that even without reinforced hearing, I could make it out clearly.

"Mother, can I say something?"

"Hmm... What is it, Suvianna?" So it is Suvianna then...

"Well... I didn't want to bring it up, but... I believe that Katarina may not have what it takes to ever succeed as a Magi; you know she has constantly been failing in the basics, forcing us to go over it over and over." This can't be happening... please not again.

"I see... such as?"

"The gems that we have given to her to practice conversion on seem to end up degrading compared to our own, we have warned multiple times to limit the flow of magical energy, but I don't think she listens to anything we say. I simply don't see the point of having her around. You said that she is supposed to act as a student under Luvia and me in order to enhance our learning as well, but I think she is actually a detriment."

"Hmm, if I find what you say to be true... then I will send her away somewhere, though perhaps she can still prove herself. Is that acceptable to you?"

"Yes, mother, thank you for listening..." The last word of the conversation was faint as I was already running back to my room in a semi-panic.

'Please! I don't want to lose it all again!'

I slam my door open, jump on my bed and scream into the fine silken sheets; they are cold, though.

I am a Saijo, not an Edelfelt, but still... this was my family now. They were all I had. Henrietta was my Mother, and Luvia and Suvia were practically my sisters.

Luvia is always so accepting of me, always watching over me and holding back for my benefit when I inevitably fail to match their greatness.

And now I was about to lose all of it. Just like before, just like with Shirou...

"Sob." And now I'm so pathetic that Ill just cry about it. Am I really still the same crybaby who cried herself to sleep the first month I came here? I guess so...

"Katarina, Are you... crying?" My heart stopped as someone entered my room.

"No, Luvia, sniff... Just something in my eye." I try to hide how I'm feeling from her. Please don't let her see me...

Not her, anyone but Luvia... She always believes in me, and she thinks I'm strong, but I'm so weak... need... to... hide.

"You know you can't trick me; I'm the oldest, you know." Hmm?

"Mom is older, though..."

"I'm the oldest of the three of us though, what did you think I didn't know what has been happening with my two sisters?"

"S-s-sister?" It's not something said out loud like that; sometimes, I wish I was Katarina Edelfelt, though.

"What? Did I say something strange?"

"Well... you called me sister..." I muttered.

"Well, Aren't we?" Her tone was assertive, similar to Henrietta's.

Normally I would agree, but after what I heard in the hall, I didn't want to be selfish anymore, "I'm... not one of you... I know, not really." I spoke quietly, afraid of where this could lead.

"..." Luvia didn't speak, for once maybe lost with what to say.

"I know that's how you see me." The pain made me angry, and the anger took away my ability to think before speaking.

"You don't have to hide it anymore... I know I'm just a waste of space!" I was too angry to think anymore.

"Hmm... it hurts, doesn't it? What did Suvia say this time? If she has made you like his, then maybe I can no longer stay back from this... No matter what it was, you heard, you are my sister, and I don't want to hear you say otherwise anymore."

'Luvia... I wish I could be as strong as you.'

"Well, Suvia... she said to mom... that maybe I should be sent away..."

"I see... is that it." she looked away from me for a moment; it almost felt like she didn't care.

The tears had dried as I sat up on my bed, hugging my red lion, Luvia's present for me when I succeeded at my first spell.

"You... you... don't care?" was... she agreeing with them!?

But she shook her head, "Wrong Katarina, It's the opposite. If I didn't care about you, I would stop Suvianna myself; that would be the easiest solution. It's just that there is one thing I think would help both of you at the same time. I not sure if you'd be up for it, though."

"So... what? you're afraid of main Suvia mad at you?"

"No, that's not it. Give me some time, and I could end all this myself with everyone coming out happy. But where would that leave you and Suvia? It would make you reliant on me to solve all your problems. I would rather that the two of you come out of this mess stronger for it." Strong, yes, I can't just let it end here, and trying to push it off on Luvia was selfish of me.

"So... what can I do then?" when she smiled at that, I realized that I had been played all the way up this moment.

"Duel Suvia on equal terms and win." Of course, it would be something like this...

"Fight Suvia... and win?" that's impossible; I've never beaten her, the best I've ever done is push her long enough for an automatic draw, and those times I was given a starting advantage.

"Or would you rather have big sis come and do it all for you?" The slight feeling of disappointment betrayed that deep in me; I kinda did want that.

"No... but why do you want me to e strong anyway?"

"Because that's not the Edelfelt way, we work together. That's how Edelfelt sisters have always done it. We're the only family that can handle two inheritors of a single magic crest, so we can't have any weak links." it was then that I realized that Luvia was truly looking at me, the third Edelfelt sister, an explanation that explained why she had worked this all out for us.

"Yes, and you need to win because that is what would have the greatest outcome. As is it is now, one day Suvia will hit a wall and won't know how to handle it."

"So... you want me to be a wall for her, is that all?"

"That's not all there is to it; if Mother really is thinking of getting rid of you, then getting Suvia on your side would guarantee your position here forever."

"Then... you want me to fight Suvia."

"Yes."

"Won't Mother get mad at us?"

"I'll deal with Mother. She'll be understanding."She seemed like she was listening to Suvia earlier, though...

"..." What is it I want?

Even if I'm content to live in Luvia's shadow, the thought that I would just be holding her back makes me sick. I will not just sit then if I have this chance!

"I'll do it."

"Excellent!" By reflex, she moved closer to me, as if she wanted something, but she composed herself.

"Ahem... yes, that's very good to hear." She went back to trying to sound like Mother.

"I don't know why you always believe in me so much."

"I believe in you because you know you don't have the right answer; that already puts you higher than Suvia."

"..." That's wrong...

Suvianna was not as generally talented as Luvia, who could already be considered a prodigy at anything she puts her mind to, but Suvia did surpass Luvia in some areas.

For instance, Suvia was, at one point, actually skilled with gems conversion than Luvia. We were all taught simultaneously, but when we first began to practice, Suvia was faster and more efficient every single try.

Of course, I far below their abilities, but I was just happy to be there at all.

That was the first time I saw Luvia lose at anything and probably the maddest she has ever been. For a week after that, Luvia started losing at almost everything, as if she had lost the will to succeed.

It got so bad that I was even able to get one over on her in grappling training when I was able to trap her into a heel hook, something she would normally never ever fall for.

Even if wrestling is something I'm okay at, Luvia normally dismantles me in seconds.

Is that it then? Does she want me to do for Suvia what Suvia did for her?

"You've been silent Katarina, is there something wrong?"

"Oh, It's just that I think I understand now... This is like what happened between you and Suvia, with the gems..." The cold facade she tried to keep up melted a little when I brought up that.

"You... noticed that...?" I mean, it was really obvious, you know...

"We all did. I mean... you never fail, then all of a sudden you were failing at stuff that even I could do. Suvia and I... I guess we just decided to let you figure it out on your own... sorry."

If there was anything that Suvia and I could coordinate on, it was supporting Luvia.

Shaking her head, Luvia closed her eyes and released her thoughts, "No... that actually helped me; if either of you had made fun of me, I wouldn't have learned my lesson. I would have just turned my frustration into hate towards both of you... I had to... learn about failure myself; otherwise, I would not be able to handle it when I'm grown up. That's what mom said anyway..."

"..." I don't think I'd seen Luvia so... honest before.

"Suvia would rather be silent than admit she has any flaws. That's how it was before as well. So... I can't just sit around anymore; I'm the big sis around here, so it's my job to look out for you two... hmph." Her face blushed a little, and she crossed her arms and made a movement to flip her hair in a sort of pout. Nee-chan was clearly embarrassed.

I had seen someone do that once before... but who was it again? ...err, I don't know. My old life was so fuzzy now; I don't really remember their faces too well anymore.

"I don't know what to say...I guess... I love you too..." I said the words before I thought about how embarrassing it is to admit. Even after three years of living with them, I still retained a casually intimate side out of place in a family accustomed to coldness.

"Don't-t think that flattery will make go easier on you!" thrusting out her finger like a girl in one of those shoujo mangas, I sneaked into her room for her last birthday.

"Ohh uhh, okay." If there was one thing I was good at, it was knowing when people were acting, Luvia was usually neutral to the point of being impossible to read but a few genuine compliments, and she falls apart. Considering the distance in our abilities, it's my only method to make her flustered in any way.

"Whatever it doesn't matter, on your honor of the last of the Saijo line and my own as the future head of the Edelfelt line, I officially condone this... arrangement between Suvianna Edelfelt and Katarina Saijo."

A bit dramatic, too be honest, but I was happy to see Luvia happy like that. She likes acting out big words and dramatic ceremonies; I was always in awe of her when she was like this. I could help but feel strange that Luvia had come to my room so quickly, though...

---

Confrontation (Music) /0dL6ixvoAxE, /mkDi4BnckMU

As I started to put on the protective Fighting gear, I started to get lost in nervous thought.

'Alright, deep breaths.'

"Ahhhhh, oooooh," I stand up and stretch; I have to be perfect this match. I can't leave it up to fate, and I need to do it with my own two hands.

Start from the basics and figure it out from there. That's what Ilmarinen said.

There is sanctioned fighting done at the clock tower, usually amongst young magi trying to make a name for themselves. So we stay within those rules, so when we grow up, we'll beat everyone. Unlike in a match between normal people, there is no small ring where the action takes place. Instead, there is a huge arena-like structure that is given extensive reinforcement with all sorts of boundary fields.

Because of that and other factors, including the fact that fighting like this is seen as barbaric amongst the older families, we have one of the fully-functioning magical arenas here, just for the benefit of the Edelfelt family. It's the largest single building in tee entire complex, its sort of like a school gym but taller and with lots of pillars everywhere.

That's where we found ourselves, a place we all knew inside and out after training here daily in allowed combat. The rules were simple enough; even at our age, we had full understanding.

There is only one round of twenty minutes. If there is no clear victor, it is an automatic draw. Apparently, there are judges in normal people's fights, but that could never work with Magi; they would never accept that. Win, lose, or draw. You are the only one who has any say in the conclusion. Amongst magi, the rules are variable between them and usually serve some strange political purpose.

There are three rule books: Reinforcement-restricted, Magic-restricted, and Magic-unrestricted.

Reinforcement-restricted only allows for the use of reinforcement magic. There are no restrictions to any move, but the match can be stopped by a referee/independent party if someone attempts to kill or main the other.

Magic-restricted opens up any form of magic that does not kill or main the opponent. This is usually only used among amicable magi who wish to test the abilities of the other or amongst enemies who would rather humiliate their enemy than outright kill them.

Though you can certainly die in such a match if you are not protecting yourself at all times.

Magic-Unrestricted is a match I hope I will never find myself in. It is a fight where anything goes, and the most common conclusion is a painful death. To be challenged to this is the greatest insult one can receive as a Magus, and to refuse it is to say that your family's mysteries are inferior to the challengers. Essentially all the rules established to prevent death are revoked, and there is no time limit. There is no forfeit in those matches; you either die or are kept alive as a symbol of your family's disgrace.

Of course, both parties can come to a draw if they simply can resolve their dispute before one of them kills the other.

In recent times Magic-Unrestricted is rarely invoked as the fatality rate is at such a high level. Of course, there have been stupid people who challenge Lord Barthomeloi and are promptly never seen again.

Our sole teacher in magic is Mother, or Mrs. Edelfelt, as I probably should be calling her. However, in martial arts, we have Mother and Ilmarinen, the lead retainer of the Edelfelts.

Ilmarinen is an aged man that towers over all of us; he is at least 200 centimeters tall. He's pretty scary, but since he is our bodyguard, that's a good thing, I guess.

He is a master of Käsikähmätaistelu, a Finnish martial art that incorporates Judo, Jiu-Jitsu, Aliso, Take Kwon do and Karate. He teaches us to be dynamic fighters, to have no empathy for our opponent, and take any opportunity to end the fight in a single blow.

He gives us personal and collective lessons where we all fight one another and cooperate in trying to fight him. It's a funny sight seeing three ten and eleven-year-old girls try and swarm a giant man. We never win, but you'd be surprised by the level of ferocity that we can bring.

When I found out that that completely incomprehensible word literally just meant 'hand-to-hand combat,' I was pretty disappointed. Though, Finnish, in general, felt incomprehensible most of the time, even with Luvia's daily lessons.

I don't know where he is right now, but I hope he'll be proud if, and hopefully, when I win this fight.

Mother, on the other hand, is a world-class wrestler. Using reinforcement magic on her own body, she can probably outwrestle someone double her size.

Henrietta was the only person who could beat Ilmarinen when they were younger or something, and now he has sworn his allegiance to the Edelfelt clan because of that.

The Edelfelt style of combat emphasizes putting pressure onto your opponent with suppressive magic then wrestling them into submission. According to Mother, it is extremely effective since many magi don't train their bodies and will fall apart as soon as you get close to them.

It gives me a smile every time she tells us a story of a mage who couldn't fathom the idea that they were so easily bested using nonmagical means and tried to call foul even as she took all of their research.

Each of the three of us has our own styles, even at this young age of development.

Suvia is really good at striking and practically begs Ilmarinen to teach her. She has already mastered the art of counter punching and waiting for a decisive killing punch. I learned that first hand when she knocked me cold once accidentally when she responded too well, but I guess it's my fault too for not being good enough.

Her wrestling is actually weaker when compared to Luvia or me, but she makes up for it with her Jiu-Jitsu ability. You can take her to the ground, but she is ready to put you in a submission if you do, which is common since that my only real strategy against her.

Luvia is her opposite in that punching seems out of the equation for her, like she doesn't even think of it. She really just wants to slam and Wrestle people to the ground then incapacitate them with grappling. The scary part is that it actually works; I think she has watched too much pro wrestling.

Though again, I was the one who was able to acquire some pro wrestling tapes for her last birthday. After seeing those, she slammed me all over the mat and couldn't do anything about it.

At least you understand how and why Suvia does what she does with her punches and kicks. But with Luvia, you don't know you've been slammed onto the mat before it's far too late to stop it.

As for me... I'm somewhere in the middle. I'm a good wrestler, better than Suvia but much worse than Luvia. My striking is nothing impressive., out of the unarmed martial skill, my grappling ability on the ground is the best; I can latch in a heel hook or move for a rear-baked choke with near seamlessness.

My forte is none of that; it's actually knives. Something I can't test without the supervision of Ilmarinen, but I feel really good with one in my hands. But weapons are only allowed in unrestricted matches, so I can't use them. It would be too easy to kill someone by accident.

Past our martial education was our magical one, which was definitely the more important one.

Luvia and Suvia would have Gandr when they would start their magic crests. A strong enough curse can be seen by the naked eye and could be changed to different degrees of strength. Ranging from giving the enemy a bad cold to necrotizing their bodies from the inside.

It was actually the only Edelfelt magic I knew about at all, not that I would receive it, though. Even with her trust, Mother gave us separate lessons when it came to the actual unique magics of our families.

Apparently, Henrietta had taken the magical crest of my Mother from her corpse and would be giving me 80% of it while keeping the rest as was offered by my original mom in the letter. It made it sound like I was some kind of hostage to e the result of some deal lie that but the fact that they actually agreed to a deal is basically charity; at least that's what I think with what I've been told about other magi.

"Haaaahh..." I exhaled as I moved on from this line of thought; when I get nervous, I always start having useless thoughts.

I check that my braids are tight and walk to where they are waiting for me.

Suvia was not far from me; we're not fast enough to take up the entire arena, so we just stay in the central area, which a tenth of the full arena. I heard that grownup Magi can jump across the whole 40 x 40-meter floor in seconds.

"Suvia, are you ready? Have you chosen the ruleset?" ruleset?, aren't we just going with Reinforcement-restricted?

Suvia's sly smile gave me a bad feeling.

"Yes, sister... Magic-restricted, correct?"

'What!?' I felt like I had been punched in the chest.

'We're way too young to fight with magic!

"That's... but... not what I agreed to..." So my plan is... completely ruined now...

"Oh, yes... I never told you, did I? Suvia said that in exchange for the stipulation that she'll accept you fully if you win, she'd get to fight you with magic allowed."

"Stipulation? What are you talking about!" a wave of rare anger rushed to my head, had Luvia betrayed me?

'I've been completely duped here!' Even if I trusted and loved Luvia lie a sister, that just made me feel worse as I felt like I was a wounded animal pushed into a corner.

But Suvia didn't wait to let me regain any composure, "Stop pretending Katarina, Luvia related your challenge; you want me to accept you? Then beat me fair and square, no baby rules stopping magic, no one to protect you from the beating you are about to receive. But, of course, as a member of the prestigious Edelfelt family, I am willing to offer you an out." That's... I don't want to do this...

"Katarina, you are simply not fit to be a magus. You are too kind for it, too weak. Mother said that If I wanted, I could kill you here and now, but I am a generous person. I'll let you live on, if only so I can o see you at the local orphanage whenever I want to have a good laugh. Hahahaha!" Deep breathes Katarina... she just wants to throw you off.

'She's right... I've been too kind to her. But she wouldn't say that if she knew what I am underneath, what I did to my real family was anything but kind.'

You know, though? I couldn't help but laugh at how mistaken she was, "Haha...Hahaha...Hahahahaha..." How stupid are you!?

Unnerved by the echoes of my giggles in the grand room, Suvia calls me uncomfortably, "Katarina..."

I don't bother speaking with her; my eyes are more than enough to communicate that this time will be different.

"Sister... perhaps we can-" The discomfort in the room grows to the point that Luvia tries to speak, but I interrupt her.

"Shut up."

"Sis-ter...?" Luvia's real character breaks through when I turn on her; her sharp brilliance turned into befuddlement.

"You've done enough, sister. I understand the rules now. Don't worry about Suvia; I'll leave her intact for you." I had planned to get up close to her, take her down, and submit her on the ground. A simple and obvious plan that she would have known I could achieve with a great deal of luck, that plan was my best chance. Unfortunately, Suvia's attribute is fire... mine is wind, but that isn't the problem... the problem is that when I see fire, I can't do anything but panic.

"Err, Fine, I'm still the referee, though." She clenches her teeth and puts her facade back on.

"Hmm, you talk big girl but remember how this always goes for you? Just this once, I'll show you how utterly pathetic you are if I'm not holding back."

(Music Stop)

"..." The time for words is already done. She just hasn't understood that yet.

"Enough, you have five seconds to prepare yourselves."

Fine, you want me to win? I won't hold back either.

"Five."

"Four."

"Three."

"Two."

"...One" Coinciding with Luvia's final count, Suvia and I spoke the words of activation.

Breakthrough (Music) /Dj0Ia4GVHz0

"Erwecken!" "Vindr!" I flip the formless switch inside me.

I feel a sensation as if the contents of my body are being exchanged; the usual nerves invert into circuits transmitting magical energy.

From this point, Katarina Saijo is not human.

She is a conduit to give magical energy form.

Our spells coincide as we both instantly fire our best spells at one another. We had not yet received the magic crests that would link us to our ancestors, but that didn't mean we were defenseless.

I immediately cart roll right towards the nearest pillar to hide, narrowly evading the scalding flame where I had been before. I close my eyes and think the pillar will probably I've me another six seconds before she starts getting antsy.

'just don't think about it, just don't think about it...' I can't panic if I just don't think about it.

From what I saw, she barely even reacted to the lance of wind I directed towards her. It was pitiful compared to her column of flame, give me ten seconds to prepare, and I could prepare a blast of wind strong enough to put her unconscious; unfortunately, she could do the same with four.

"What? Is little Katarina startled by some fire ?" Suvia called out in a mocking tone.

Rage started to fill my mind for a split second. If I couldn't handle seeing fire without falling apart, then I would just have to fight with my eyes closed.

"Anfang, Möge der Wind immer in meinem Rücken sein!" Something that I thought of once, a stupid idea that Luvia promptly shot down as asinine.

"Whatever that spell was, no matter how strong you think it, you know it won't work on me..." She sounds perfectly confident, but you can't trick someone who knows you as a sister. She's nervous; I can feel it in my bones. It makes me smile.

I'm going to charge in three seconds. If I miscast or the spell doesn't work like I think it will, I'll likely either be burnt to a crisp or be horribly injured.

'But this is the only path...' She can't possibly expect that I'll simply take her strongest hit head-on.

'Alright... Now!' My eyes closed, I do two fast rolls left from the pillar, I'm most vulnerable now, but if I'm right, she won't attack because she'll think she needs to have a perfect cast, which requires at least a two-second chant.

"Beschuss!" Suvia loudly casts her spell, but I already made it in time.

"Vindr." A whisper activates the mystery that will decide this match. The air rapidly flows from a line in front of me and coalesces behind me, forming a massive pressure that quickly forces me forward. The last thing rational thing I see is the terrified eyes of both of them as they recognize that I'm not evading the lethal inferno.

As I sapped the air from the path of the flame towards me, I suppressed it to the point that the wind forces it to join my insane charge into Suvia.

"Huh- Ahhhhh!" Suvia's shock at thinking she had killed me confuses her long enough that I tackle her at an incredible speed, rolling us both across the room.

Fighting all the way as the tension of the ground slows us down, neither of us recognizing pain as our bodies are equally crushed, burned, and cut.

Stoppin fully with her on top of me, she rips at my hair with a deranged look in her eyes. I try to do the same, but when I pull on one of her braids, a whole patch falls off like ash.

When she sees that, I think she lost the last vestige of rational thought.

"I won't lose to you! I won't lose you!" Even her screaming sounded contradictory.

I try to capitalize on her insanity by moving for a kimura lock, but she does something I didn't expect. She simply rolled off of me, leaving her position of power.

"I know all your games, Katarina." She saw right through me. Even if I could trick her with an insane stunt, I still couldn't win off that.

If I let her get away, she'll cast at me again, and I already used my single trump card, but fighting her in close standup combat was where she most skilled.

'I think-' In my hesitation, while getting myself up, she propelled at me, delivering the choice for me in the form of a punch.

Driving my face with a jab, she moved directly into a spinning back kick, but that allowed me to catch it, pushing her forward in another tackle with me on top. I wasn't moving consciously anymore; a strange instinct inside me started to take over as if it recognized the danger.

But as we go down, she wraps her arms around my neck, placing a guillotine choke on me that I can barely mitigate with my waning strength. My reinforcement failing from the loss of blood and the unconventional spell earlier.

'Aghhh!' I put my feet back and, with strength that simply should be there, suplexed her, throwing her onto her back behind me in a desperate method of escape.

'Who knew, Luvia's pro wrestling obsession might have been useful after all.'

Yet by the time I was back up completely exhausted, she was there, waiting for me as if I hadn't just slammed her onto her back.

Like an axe murderer, she came at me relentlessly, so fast that I could only respond with my fists.

A left jab hits on my cheek, but I avoid the big right hiding behind it.

Moving closer, Suvia's eyes reflect a passion I simply couldn't muster. If anything, my whole body started feeling cold.

I try and jab at her while moving away, but she just comes again with a flurry, She chops my neck and knees me in the solar plexus, but I'm still barely able to avoid the right knockout blow.

The room was dark now. The two of us the only ones with color left; shadows danced at the edge of my vision. They circled our frantic battle as if they were waiting for one of us to fall so they could feed on their remains.

'At this rate... I'm done for.' I move in to grapple, but she doesn't allow a single second to initiate, pounding into me with a three-punch flurry before hitting with a crunching leg kick.

Limping back, I can hardly keep myself standing, Again she kicks on the same leg, and I'm left to focus my entire willpower on staying standing.

Yet that leaves me completely open to attack, smashing my chin again and finishing me with a rib rattling spin kick, collapsing my body to the ground.

Track 06 (Music) /viDXSNJmWZ0

My body was done, I couldn't win with that anymore, but my soul still had some fight in it.

Standing over my broken body, breathing heavily, Suvia spoke instead of finishing me, "Hah, hah, it's over Katarina... hah, you won't remember me, but I did this for you... Luvia, where are you!? end the match already!" In the decisive moment, when she could have ended the fight, she chose instead to retain her humanity.

But that was her unfortunate mistake.

'How much is too much sacrifice? If you give up everything in order not to lose anything, what's the point?', if only I had retained the ability for rational thought to stop myself from giving in.

'Help... me.' I quit fighting against the shadows. In fact, I invited them to come.

And they responded by staining the world in black, my body growing senseless. No longer in control, I stood up, shambling towards my distracted victim.

She never stood a chance. The match didn't end because of a flashy move or complex spell. It ended because one of the participants had given up their humanity before the other.

Suvia's instincts were panicking, but looking for Luvia had misled her, "Luvia! Get over here alre- Aghhhh!" I wrapped my arm around her neck and flipped her to the ground, yet this time I allowed no counter.

Mercilessly I enveloped her into an anaconda choke, strangling her between her own shoulder and neck.

'Kill her!' The shadows screamed in chorus.

My arms tightened around her throat, her eyes begged me to stop, desperate to breathe, but I wouldn't stop.

As I stared into her flickering eyes, I could see my own reflected back, two pitch-black abysses.

She passed out, yet I didn't stop; I had given myself to an impulse that would accept nothing less than murder.

"It's over, Katarina! You win!" Another prey tried to pull me off, but I had no intention of letting go.

'Stop it!' A troublesome part of me wanted me to stop, weakening me enough that the prey could separate us.

Another few moments and she would have succumbed, but as the pain started to return to my body, that thought began to terrify me.

Suvia was out cold, and as I looked on at her, I followed, the shadows unsatisfied after being denied their due.

---

THIS ILLUSION (piano ver. (Music)) /tcnmWGyOOPA

When I came to, I felt horrible. It was more visceral pain than even after the fire. My sides had been burned, my skin preserved by reinforcement and protective clothing. Nevertheless, it still stung. My head felt really foggy, but I vaguely understood that I had won, somehow.

'I actually did it...? but... how?'

I couldn't recall what had happened in detail...

I think I lost control of myself during the fight; the presence of fire was presumably enough to make me go berserk.

How long have I been out? This room has an advanced healing boundary field, so I very slowly getting better.

Someone was crying near me, "I'm sorry...sob... I'm so sorry..., guuh." Suvia was crying not so far away.

"Why are you crying, Suvia?" my voice came out as a hoarse murmur, barely moving through the wind.

She was laid out near me, but I didn't have the energy to even look at her.

"I failed, sniffle, I failed... I failed..." We no longer had any capacity for deceit, the thick veil that magi are expected to have shattered with our bones.

I had never really hated her; I simply was unable to understand her dislike for me. But now, I think that I may actually agree with her.

"Do I really make you so sad? I guess... I think you may have been right; I should probably leave this place." I had fought so hard to win, to find acceptance, but I wasn't sure that I deserved it anymore.

It broke my heart to say but running away seemed so much easier than taking on my issues head-on.

I felt tainted, Impure. I think that I really was going to kill her if Luvia didn't stop me.

'Where is she anyway?'

"... I don't want to be in yo. Iway, so I'll ask moth- Mrs. Edelfelt... to take me away from here. I don't want to be here if it gets in your way."

"No! You can't!" Her facade broken, she started saying something I would never have expected to hear.

"Why not? Didn't you say it yourself? I'm 'just a waste of space around her, impeding on the growth of the actual' important people." I tried to appear nonchalant, but I only achieved sounding spiteful, though I was mostly mad at myself.

"When did I ever say that?" She sounded confused by my accusation.

"I saw you and mom in the hall..."

"I don't know what you are talking about." She said with a soft voice.

I slowly turned my body so I could judge her lying face. My eyes were always a pretty reliable judge of character.

I gazed deeply at her as if to judge and... and...

'...?'

There was no lie.

There was fear, there was anger, but no true wickedness. She was not guilty of what I had accused her of, but that's impossible. That didn't calm me down at all. It just made me more annoyed.

'If Suvia wasn't the one who was there, then... no...'

I didn't want to acknowledge something like this.

'It must have been Suvia in the hall; Mother called her by name after all!'

The two facts came into conflict with one another. Either Suvia could deceive my eyes, or someone else had been in the hall with mom; there is only a single other person it could even be.

Once you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, no matter how improbable, must be the truth; Mother told us that once.

"Why the bullying then? I've always wanted to get along with you." Her eyes seemed sad hearing that.

"Hah, I... you don't understand... I wanted you to have a choice, a way for you to leave. I wanted to give you the chance to leave. I thought you were too kind to be a magus. I guess I was mistaken."

'The bullying, the vicious words, all that was her being considerate of me? I can't believe that!' I didn't feel so righteous anymore; I was just confused about everything that I understood.

"The words... I know they were... hurtful, but every time I wanted to stop, Mom and Luvia told me to continue, to pester you more and more."

'What the heck was all this then?' I started to realize it, the trick that had been in front of me the entire time. Luvia was manipulating Suvia just as much as she had done to me, or was it Mother working through Luvia?

We had manipulated into a fabricated rivalry, and I had nearly killed her for it.

But I can't be angry at it. Every time Suvia pestered one of my weaknesses, I fixed it. Of course, true magi like Mom would keep pushing anything if it saw returns.

"Then we were both fools then..." I saw it now; Luvia had orchestrated all of this to test me. She told me just enough truth that I accepted it readily, believing she was actually generous when in reality, she had pushed me into a corner and controlled all of my exits.

'Darn Luvia, you will be an excellent magus one day...'

"Hah, Yeah..." it made me smile a little. It all felt so small now.

"I-I didn't have to be so mean, though... I was so bad... I'm sorry, sob...I... I... was just so angry that Daddy wasn't coming home, that using you as a vent was easy, so... I'm sorry!" Her voice cracked as it seemed that she genuinely had

Perhaps she had simply done it so long that she didn't know how to stop.

I could deny her my forgiveness, but that would just mean that I would become the bully myself. Mom, err, my original Mom, once said that 'if you can't forgive someone then you always be a prisoner to that single feeling.' So I'll throw it away and start over.

"Friends?" I held out my hand as if create a new beginning to our relationship. I was sure that it would work this time.

"No..." My heart dropped, and my head started feeling light in sheer defeat.

It was almost so bad that I didn't hear her continue.

"...How about sisters instead?" And she took my gashed hand into her own, smearing each other's blood onto one another.

"Yeah... I'd like that." I wonder,

We were eventually picked up by nurses hired by the Edelfelt family and were brought to the infirmary building.

We shared the room, but we didn't talk. There wasn't much else to say.

Only the nurses came to see us; it was like we had both been discarded.

I think I know why though, Luvia probably hates me after what happened at the end of the fight.

I can only make it out vaguely, but I am disgusted by what I became.

(Music Stop)

Two days later, the nurse told Suvia to report to Mother, two hours after that, she came for me.

---

*Two Days Later*

The End of Reminiscence (Music) /YJhC70dPN2Y

The walk to mother's study didn't take long, though I felt a little light-headed being up for the first time in two days.

I sit in front of her in a comfortable chair marked exclusively for me; next to me are the chairs only for Luvia and Suvia.

But they aren't here right now.

"How are you feeling? The nurses tell me you didn't want to accept any treatment." She had a face that could appear very kind, yet she often sounded stern.

It left you guessing what her true nature was. The answer was that she was a magus, so both were true.

"It is fine, Mother... I just... didn't want to heal faster than Suvia did..." I didn't tell her that I felt like I deserved the pain.

Already an awkward silence held between us, a bad feeling in the pit of my stomach ate away at me.

"Is it not uncomfortable for you to call me that?" huh? she changed the subject entirely.

"Call you what?"

"You had a Mother once... a real Mother. Is it not strange to call someone else the same title?"Why bring it up now... It's been like this for a while...

"I don't know... Mom... she, and everyone else, they are gone now... Sometime soon, I will have lived here longer than I did in Japan; I think then: I can't even be called Japanese anymore." I put my head down and pondered about the future.

"For a magus... there will be much that will be left unsaid... You will have to learn to enjoy the subtle parts of life, though you can spend as much money as you want. That's how Luvia calms down, I think." I wasn't Luvia though, someone around here had to look out for our economics.

"What is that? Sut-ill-tee?"

"It's sub-tle-ty, Katarina... and I think that it is not a lesson that I could teach you. Both you and your sisters will understand quickly when you make your debut into the association."

"..." She silently walked up in front of me, towering over my slim sitting form.

She hadn't much aged a day since the day she had whisked me away from all that horribleness, when Luvia is her age, I wonder if they'll look the same.

"I can be your Mother... but... I cannot treat you fully as a daughter. Do you remember I said that to you once?"

"Err, I think so?" a long time ago...

"The Edelfelts are different from normal magi. We are unique in that we have the ability to be a real family... or at least try to... Both Luviagelita and Suvianna, despite their disagreements, will soon inherit our family's magic crest. Even so... Katarina, your initial usefulness has hit its end." Her words hit me hard. Was the fight not enough?

"Why did you raise me then... If I am a nuisance, then... I would be fine going off if that would make you happy." It was hard to say, but it was true. If leaving could help them all, then I would do it, even if it meant losing everything all over again.

"Haha... Katarina, that is the last time I will tolerate you saying such a thing in this household. I forgive you now, considering that I did lead you to believe that, but if you continue to value yourself so lowly, then maybe I should consider such a course of action after all."

"No! I won't say it again." She seemed to enjoy seeing me flustered.

"Haha, you are an easily influenced young girl. But, I think that's why we all like you so much."

"Not Suvia, though, she said... she loved me, but she never showed it before..."

"Hmm... The difference between love and hate is not as far as you think."

"So... you will hurt someone because you love them, I'd never do that."

"You'll understand one day, jealousy... amongst magi, there is no more dangerous feeling. If we had allowed Suvia to go on all alone forever, it would have eventually rent the Edelfelt family in half."

"Nonetheless, Katarina, she has accepted you now, but until she finally comes clean about how she really feels, don't expect her to stop pestering you."

"No... we already spoke." Did Suvia not tell her?

"Oh, did you?"

"Well... we agreed that going forward, we would be sisters."

"Did you? That's great news!" though her smile seemed a bit forced, or perhaps crooked.

It kind of made me mad, so I said something I probably should have kept to myself.

"She also said that you and Luvia were the ones that kept telling her to bully me..." Her smile waned, but she didn't seem surprised

"That's an interesting thing to hear. Did you think it was wrong of Luvia to do?" It was Luvia's idea!?

"Well... I understand why... if it is to make me stronger, I can take it.'

"I thought the same thing; I'm proud of your resolve." But still, did it have to be so... deceptive?

"But... are children... supposed to be treated like test subjects?" The question amused seemed to amuse her.

"Hoho, did you read that in one of your little books. The answer is yes. I believe that any good family of Magi teaches their young through experimentation. Pain is temporary. What you can achieve, though, could be permanent."

"I do want to be strong..."

"I know it's hard now, but when you've made it through and grown-up, then you will be thankful that I made you strong now before you faced a serious challenge in the real world."

"Are real-world fights as hard as the one I had with Suvia?' if I had to do that all the time, I don't think ill last very long.

"No, no, real-world grown-up fights between main are far, far more difficult and incredible than what you two did. Though considering your ages, you both showed incredible fortitude." But wait... how would she now?

"Did you... see the match?" a cold sweat dripped down my back.

"Oh, yes, I was in the observation deck. Did you notice that the lights were on?" I did see that, I recalled.

"You... saw... what I did?" the question was inevitable; it wasn't a gloat but a resignation.

"What? when you performed that odd wind spell or when you won?" Oh, yeah, I forgot I did perform a pretty absurd spell then.

"Well, I kind of lost it when she knocked me down." The fact that I fell unconscious not long after that

"Yes, that was quite impressive; what do you remember, anything strange then?" Of course, if anyone knew what that was, it would be Henrietta.

"Hmm, well, I started seeing some strange shadows, I think... and then my eyes felt weird and... I don't really remember anything past that." When she heard me speak of my eyes, it seemed as if an electrical shock went through her body, as if she had understood something very suddenly.

"Something wrong, Mom?" She looked deep in thought.

"Your... eyes, is it? have you... do you ever see strange things?" What are you talking about Mom...

"You mean like during the fight? Hmm, once in a while, I guess, but that's normal right?" She brought her hand to her face and sighed.

"I'm sorry, Katarina, I've been a poor mother for you. I didn't check you for one of the most obvious things; we'll have to do that later." She took out her notes and, with a long quill, wrote in large type: 'PERFORM MYSTIC EYES TEST ON KATARINA!'.

'Hmm, I wonder what that means.'

After that, she got engrossed in writing for a while, forgetting that I'm even there. But I don't mind, I get to look around her study. It has all sorts of cool drawings and old books, even some ceremonial knives from all sorts of places. Most of them were taken from other Magi Families as compensation for a contract; the Edelfelt directly created only a few.

There was even a short Japanese sword behind her desk. I wonder where she found that?

When she finally remembered I was here, she said something that shocked me.

"Listen, Katarina; I've decided to adopt you fully." Huh?

"Adopt me... fully?"

"Yes, I've decided that you are far too valuable just to be an ally of ours when you grow up. So instead, I want you to join the Edelfelt family." my heart skipped a beat as I was offered something that I secretly desired.

"...I-I don't... know, what about Mom and Dad? and Shirou, could I still see them in Heaven when I die?" My first thoughts were jumbled; giving up my name was much to ask for.

"You can keep Saijo as your middle name. Of course, your heritage will live on with you; it's just that you will be a true representative of the Edelfelts." I was so nervous now that I didn't know what to say...

"Then... well, err, can I think about it?" Slight disappointment escaped her veil.

"Hmph, if you were anyone else, I would be offended that you didn't take the offer immediately, but this once, I will allow it. First, however, I want you to consider it fully and come to me with your decision; understand?"

"Yes, m-mother." I was a bit shook.

"Now off to bed with you. You can go back to your room no if you feel alright."

"Oh-h.. yes Mother, Have a good night!" I waved at her as I left the study. She seemed satisfied watching seeing me off to my room.

In the halls, dark clouds kept the world cool and dark, even in the late summer. Despite that, the hall mirror outside my room presented my reflection. The conversation gave me much to think about, and mirrors had a way of bringing me to a sense of... calmness maybe? or perhaps rightness was the correct description.

All this recent stress made me satisfied to bask in it. The girl who looked back was the girl I wanted to be, taller, more beautiful, as strong as Luvia, and fast Suvia. Yet never more, I'm not selfish enough to ever think of surpassing either of them. I just want someone to follow... I've always been the youngest, so it's kind of natural that I ended up this way. In that way, I'm happy to be subordinate to them, to help them succeed before myself.

The mirror shown with a long-gone sight. Two boys and a girl ran across the park with loving gave of their Mother keeping them company, keeping them safe. I was a follower then... However, when the gaze left, even for a moment... only the girl remained... covered in the blood of her brothers.

'No!' the repressed memory resurfaced and threatened to end me. My body sweat, and my heartbeat like a drum in my head... I held my head as visceral images flickered through my mind threatening me the return of what would shred everything that I've built to bits.

Forget... forget...forget... 'There is no place for this within me! Take it away, please!'

Normally a human would only reinforce a memory that they specifically wished to forget but... for me, It all whisked away, flowing into the mirror, hopefully never to return. But If I were so lucky, I would never have had to confront it in the first place.

'Huh, what was I thinking about again?'

Right, I think I understood only then what it all meant, what she had done and was still doing. It wasn't just a way to get me and Suvianna and me to get along, and it wasn't just a way for me to push past what I thought were my limits. It was a test. Mother wanted to see how far I would go to keep up.

I wasn't particularly smart; Luvia had that skill of getting her way and knew more about the magic association than many real magi probably do. Suvia had book smarts and could easily beat any of us at chess. Then there's me... I don't really know what I can do, to be honest. I'll just have to make up for it somehow; I must have something if Mom wants to make me actually an official daughter. Even if I am cursed, I will help them, I will make this family succeed, and I will do it with my own two hands.

This sort of... brooding was could do right, The mirror always got me this way... showing me things that weren't really there, presenting something beyond myself. That was my greatest intelligence, I guess, I had an affinity for epiphany.

'See Katarina? Not so Stupid, are you?' Shirou's voice seemed to reverberate in the distance.

Even if I was blind to do much of what is true, I was confident in my ability to read other people.

That's why I understood. Mother looked at me with the care of a mama bear, but also the greed of a dragon. It was those two feelings that met within her and came to a compromise.

I need to come to terms with Luvia; whether I apologize or she does, I can't just let my best friend keep away from me; I wouldn't be able to handle it.

With that thought, I entered my room and fell asleep, my position in the Edelfelt residence secure.

---

Author's notes.

Though it is the longest chapter yet. I have a lot of material for Katarina going forward, She will meet people Shirou doesn't, and some he will. Think of her as a representative of the story's 'far side', while Shirou is on the nearer side.

This chapter is really meant to establish the Edelfelts and her from an early age, maybe ill fill in pieces of what happened in the first three years but that would just e extraneous information. I'll be going back to Shirou now and will probably push his arc all the way up to the end of book one, which I'm aiming to be approximately 100,000 words. As you have probably noticed, the theme of book one is 'family' and much of it is establishing and changes the families of the characters. I mean if you look at the family tree of all the characters, it's pretty messed up how much all of these ids are being thrown around by everyone.

There's also a character sheet that I'm working on for the story that ill figure out how to release at some point, considering FFN has a bad time with links. I'm working so unfortunately I can't always be writing but I am keeping with this story no matter what.

This took forever to write, sorry about that, though actually, I wrote this in 31 days, and with a word length of 17000, that's 548 words per day which is a pretty good pace.

As always, favorites, follows and reviews are very cherished! Tell me what you like, tell me what you dislike or want to be changed, I'll probably do it. Even if it's to tell me I messed up a sentence or some grammar, I'll appreciate anything other than hate mail.