Cleaning day, as it turns out, has nothing to do with the upkeep of the King of Asgard's squalid abode. Instead, cleaning day turns out to be the day on which the King of Asgard himself is cleansed. "We gotta do it today, bro," Korg informs Loki some time after Thor has fallen asleep on Loki's shoulder. "Otherwise the whole schedule's thrown off. He won't wanna do it again 'till next month!"

Loki's stomach rolls as he looks down at Thor, at the cakey mess of his beard, at the matted grime of his hair. Growing up, Thor had loved nothing more than a long, decadent bath, often indulging in more than one each day. Now he is only bathing once a month? If that? Oh, no, absolutely not. That is going to be the first thing Loki changes about this arrangement. "He needs to bathe every day," Loki informs Korg. "This is non-negotiable." He can deal with the drinking later. The conditions in this dingy boat need to improve immediately.

Loki shifts slightly, trying to gauge the depth of Thor's sleep. His brother snorts softly and rolls off the sofa with a loud thump, springing to his feet with the unsteady grace of a man who is not only extremely intoxicated, but who is unused to being considerably heavier than he once was. His hands raise in a defensive position, fists clenched in front of his face. It takes him a moment to regain a sense of reality, and his bleary eyes focus on Loki.

"Loki… Loki!" Thor grins widely, flinging his arms out to the sides. "I am so – you stayed!" Loki shoves the guilt that awed statement sparks deep, deep down.

"Of course I stayed, you moron," Loki snaps instead of apologizing for making Thor ever doubt him. Loki has had considerably longer to come to terms with his fate; truly, he feels better than he has in years. Still, his own emotional well-being is still somewhat tentative, and if he has to put this wall up to protect himself AND Thor (because if he doesn't have a shield, he will run, and that will be the end of Thor), well, so be it. "You wanted me back, well now you're stuck with me."

Thor gazes at him, for a long, long time and for a moment Loki wonders if Thor has fallen asleep with his eyes open. But then, suddenly, Thor takes a deep, shuddery breath and visually steels himself. "Right. Okay." He spins around for a moment until finding an unopened beer, cracking it open and chugging it down without pausing for breath. "That's much better." He shakes himself and Loki suddenly realizes that perhaps his presence is… going to complicate things, a little. "Oh, sorry, you want one?"

As if he hadn't just clearly had some kind of – what was that, even? As if Loki is just a regular everyday visitor. Loki suppresses a shiver, wondering just how far Thanos had pushed Thor in order to break him like this. "You've had plenty for both of us," he comments blandly. He isnt interested in picking a fight, though. He is already strategizing how to get Thor into the bath; no need to overcomplicate things for the time being. "Korg says its cleaning day," he adds, deciding to adopt Thor's newly-casual tone.

The King of Asgard grunts, crushing the empty can and snatching up another. "Nah, it can wait," he says, waving dismissively as he settles heavily back onto the sofa.

"It really cannot," Loki counters, putting some distance between them to illustrate his point. "You smell like the goat barn." Worse, actually, but Loki only has so much energy for kicking his brother when he's down. Once, the idea of Thor dishonored and humiliated in such a manner would have given him no end of pleasure. Now, it just makes him uncomfortable. He wonders if admitting that to Thor would help or not, but then realizes that for all his tongue is silver and his words carefully smithed, he is unable to articulate just what it is that is making his guts feel like they're being twisted every time he looks at his brother. No, sentiment may not be as bad as he had previously believed, but it is still not the sort of thing Loki traffics in.

Thor looks over at him and makes a move as if he's about to speak, but then seems to reconsider, turning his attention back to the beer in his hand. "You'll still be here after?" he asks so softly after such a long period of silence that his voice is almost startling. "I know you're not real, but this is much better than most of them. Could almost believe it." He shakes his head, eyes not moving from something on the floor. "I shouldn't have to take a bath when I'm asleep," he pouts, as if simply accepting the fact Loki is a delusion and deciding to play along.

Loki rubs his thumb against the palm of his opposite hand, his emotions roiling far, far too close to the surface. He nearly stands, then, nearly bolts for the door. Or better, he schemes reflexively, wait until Thor has passed out and leave then. Let him think this had all been a dream. Let him have that comfort, of a nice afternoon spent with his long-dead younger brother. He digs his thumbnail into the flesh of his palm and twists to keep himself from acting on the impulse. "I would think taking a dream bath would be better," Loki manages, deciding that his previous decision not to pick a fight should extend to arguing about the reality of his existence with a man who can barely keep his eyes from crossing as he turns his focus back to Loki. "Since you're going to have three people catering to you. Well. One person, a pile of rocks, and a bug, anyway –"

Thor pulls away abruptly. "You don't have to help," he says. "I'll do it." He pulls himself upright, onto his feet, and somehow manages to stay there. "I don't need you to do that."

"Thor…"

All previous semblance of pleasantry drains from Thor's expression, replaced with a murderous, furious, explosive rage. "I DON'T NEED YOUR HELP!" he bellows, taking a step towards Loki, who springs to his own feet and vaults over the sofa to keep something between himself and Thor who, despite his current physical and mental condition, would still be very capable of causing Loki some real harm if he tried. "I HAVENT NEEDED YOU FOR FIVE YEARS! I NEEDED YOU THEN BUT YOU GOT YOURSELF KILLED!" He sags, suddenly, and lists to one side, angry tears rolling down his cheek. "I'm fine without you. I'm fine without you." He swipes at his eyes with the back of his hand, clearly trying to get ahold of himself. "I'm fine."

Instead of pointing out the obvious error in Thor's assessment of himself, Loki sighs and says, "I did have a plan, you know." He had, but it had been based on assumptions of how mortals he had met for five minutes a decade previously would act, and more importantly, how THOR would act. Clearly, his assumptions had been wrong. "I meant to be back much sooner." This is dancing dangerously close to a real conversation, so Loki pulls hard on his feelings to bring things up short. Neither of them are ready for a real conversation yet. "Come on, brother. It's just a dream, let me help you. If it's just a dream, there's no harm done."

It occurs to Loki that the real reason Thor is hesitant to accept his help has to do with the fact he now rivals Volstagg for largest Asgardian Loki has ever seen, and he lets a fond smirk settle across his features. "And it's not as though I've never helped you bathe before."

"There was less of me, then," Thor points out sullenly, confirming Loki's suspicion, as well as telling him that Thor's ability to emotionally regulate himself has been absolutely destroyed just as surely as anything else Thanos had ruined.

Loki rolls his eyes. "Thor, nothing that I will see when your clothes come off will be a surprise. I do have eyes, you know." He wants to reassure Thor that nothing will change Loki's feelings for him, that no changes to Thor's once-godly physique could impact what Loki sees in his mind's eye when he thinks about his brother. But all of that is too much, too real, and he can't. "Don't worry about it. Getting that – what is that, a bird's nest? – out of your beard will make a world of difference."

Thor seems to consider both Loki's words and the contents of his beer with equal intensity and it isn't until he has emptied three more cans that he speaks again. "Yeah. Alright. S'a dream. Can't hurt. But you – you're not allowed to laugh at me, brother."

Loki's heart twists. "I wouldn't dream of it," he says, fully truthful, and then he takes Thor's arm to guide him to the bath.

-tbc-

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