A/N: And so the fall out chapters start. :D I was reading on one of the websites about IM3 how Pepper will have an integral part to play in the movie which I'm super excited about. Then I read that GP isn't confirming if she'll do another IM movie and people are speculating Pepper won't survive IM3. I honestly never even considered that happening. I'd be devastated if Pepper doesn't make it out of IM3 alive. :( Pepper is such an important part of Tony that his character doesn't work as well for me without her. I'm really hoping they won't go there and RDJ talks GP into more movies. He talked her into the Avengers, after all. I think he'd be a hard guy to say no to, personally. ;)

Okay, so on with the chapter. I'm hopeful of another one tomorrow as well. This kind of stuff is way faster to write then the action. :D

Hope you enjoy.

Chapter Sixty-Nine

The Avengers sat in the hospital waiting room, quietly keeping vigil. The only real sound was Bruce's chewing as he downed candy bar after candy bar, discarding them by his feet. The discarded wrappers were already almost up to his knee. Tony was sitting across from him and moved a little restlessly in his chair, glancing over at Steve, Thor and Clint down more than a few seats away. Clint was bent over, head in his hands and not moving. He'd barely spoken since they'd arrived. They'd gotten out of him that Natasha's injuries had to do with a brain tumour she'd been hiding from them. When they'd gotten to the hospital, she'd been taken in for immediate surgery. After that Clint had stopped talking.

"Don't even think about coming closer," Steve cautioned him. "You two stink."

"It's only the sulphur smell from the lava," Tony said dismissively. "It's not that bad." It felt good to have the distraction of idle chatter. Natasha was fighting for her life and there was nothing any of them could do about it. He knew they were all hating it.

"Magma," Bruce corrected him around a mouthful of chocolate. "Magma is under the ground, lava is above."

"It still stinks," declared Steve. He sat back in his chair and they lapsed into silence again.

Fury had stayed behind and helped with the clean up, instructing the team to stay together. They would have anyway. One of their number was down and no one was going anywhere until they knew for sure Natasha was going to be alright. Tony glanced over at the despondent figure Clint cut and felt the other man's pain. He knew what it was to fear for the people you cared about. His instincts about there being more between Clint and Natasha then they were admitting to, most likely even to themselves seemed to be on the money.

Steve moved in his seat, breaking the silence again. "Everyone is thinking it," he said in frustration. "I'm just going to say it. Natasha should have told us about the brain tumour. We let her go into battle and risk her life."

"We all risked our lives, Steve," Tony defended her. "And I get why she didn't tell us." He glanced over at the still silent Clint. "Most of us anyway."

"She could die because we let her fight today," said Steve unevenly, clearly upset at the idea.

"Verily," interrupted Thor, "I do not believe we have the power to let Natasha Romanoff do anything. For a warrior, there is never any choice but to lend your strength to battle."

"And if she hadn't, we'd all be dead now," Tony observed.

"We don't know that," insisted Steve stubbornly.

"It's a pretty good bet," returned Tony. "Look, Natasha did what she had to do. It was her choice and none of you would know what you'd do if you were facing something like that." He pulled a face. "All I know is that she handled it a hell of a lot better than I did when I was facing my own mortality."

Steve looked pensive. "I just feel like we failed her as a team. We should have known. We should have been able to protect her."

"Some fights you can only face alone," said Tony quietly. "None of us might like it, but that's just the reality of the situation."

Jane appeared in the doorway and walked up to Bruce, her arms loaded up to overflowing with candy bars. "I raided every vending machine I could find," she told him as she dumped the chocolates on the chair next to Bruce. "I hope it's enough."

"Thanks, Jane," said Bruce around a mouthful of Snickers and M&M's, "that was sweet of you." He reached for a handful of the bars and started tearing the wrappers off.

"I'm just glad to have something to do," she said, taking a seat next to Thor who smiled warmly at her. Jane looked around the room. "I guess there is no news yet?"

Steve shook his head. "Not yet. They said it was a complicated operation. It's going to take time."

"But her physician is most highly regarded," Thor noted, "and Natasha Romanoff is strong in will and body. I believe her able to fight this last battle valiantly and arise victorious."

"We all believe that, Thor," agreed Tony. He hated being this helpless, but another issue was slowly eating away at him. "Jane, have you been back to the Tower at all? You know, since this all started."

Jane turned in her seat to address him. "I tried to get back in about an hour or so after Thor left, but the whole building was locked down. I couldn't get in."

Tony's stomach turned over nervously. His feeling of ominous dread grew. "You didn't happen to see Pepper around anywhere, did you?"

"No." Jane's eyes went a little wider. "Why? Is there a problem?"

"I've just been having trouble getting in contact with her," admitted Tony. He pulled out his phone. "I'll try again." A nurse walked by and gave him a dirty look, and inclined her head at the large sign on the wall instructing people not to use their cell phones in the waiting room. Tony grimaced, torn.

"Go outside and use your phone," Clint instructed him quietly. It was the first time he'd spoken in awhile. "You need to make sure Pepper is alright."

There was nothing more Tony wanted to do right then, but he still hesitated out of loyalty.

Clint held his gaze steadily. "We'll come and find you if there's news," he reassured him, voice low.

Tony sent him a grateful look. "I'll only be a minute." He turned around and hurried off down the corridor and away from the waiting room. Tony dialled Pepper's number yet again, anxiously waiting for her to pick up. As he walked along, Tony saw a stray Almond Joy bar on the ground. Jane must have dropped it as she walked back with her armful of candy bars for Bruce. Tony distractedly bent down and picked it up, shoving it into his back pocket. The sound of the call being answered sent a huge flood of relief through Tony's body. "Pep," he said eagerly, "finally. I was starting to worry."

"It's me, boss."

An icy hand of fear grabbed at Tony's heart. His pace slowed as he walked around the corner and came face to face with a dirty and battered looking Happy. That niggling fear which had been in the back of his head all day consumed Tony totally in that moment, as Happy lowered the phone from his ear and made a regretful face.

"Don't panic," he instructed Tony.

All the blood drained from Tony's face. "Where is she?" he rasped.

"She's on the next floor up, in her room. She's just come out of surgery and the doctors say she's going to be fine but-"

Tony couldn't hear anymore and not be getting to Pepper. He started to run, pushing past Happy and looking for the stairs which would take him to the next floor. Tony could hear Happy running behind him but didn't stop. The blood roared in his ears as fresh panic flooded his body. There was only one thought in his head. Pepper, Pepper, Pepper. He had to get to Pepper. He'd known this. He'd known something was wrong all day but let himself believe everything was okay. Knowing Pepper was safe was the only way Tony had ever been able to function and he'd ignored his gut.

"Tony, stop!" Happy ordered him from behind.

Tony had found the door to the internal staircase and ripped it open, rushing up the stairs and didn't even bother to respond to Happy's desperate command. He took the stairs two and three at a time, unable to think beyond getting to Pepper.

"Tony, stop!" Happy yelled at him again. "You have to calm down!"

Tony did respond to that. He turned and shouted back over his shoulder at Happy. "Calm down! Pepper's been in surgery and you didn't call me! You're lucky I'm not pounding you into a bloody pulp!" Tony was filled with an impotent rage, mainly at himself for not listening to his instincts, but Happy was putting himself in the firing line. He couldn't waste time anymore time. Tony turned back around and started up the stairs again. He was at the first landing of the stairs when he was suddenly floored by Happy throwing himself at him. Tony hit the ground face first, with Happy on his back, pinning him down. "Get off me!" he managed to grunt.

"Not until you calm down!"

A white hot rage shot through him. "I need to get to Pepper!" he yelled. "She needs me! Get off me!" Tony struggled but Happy was a much bigger man than him and he was just a dead weight on top of Tony.

"Pepper does need you, but she doesn't need crazy you!" retorted Happy forcefully, breathing hard. "You're going to calm the hell down or I'm not letting you within a hundred feet of her! She's been through enough, she doesn't need you out of control and making things worse."

Tony gave up struggling as Happy's words sunk in. The fight went out of Tony as he pictured a helpless Pepper. "Get off me," he said shakily, more quietly this time.

"Are you going to behave yourself?"

"Yes."

Happy rolled off him and sat with his back against the wall, still breathing heavily and eyeing Tony warily. Tony stood up and looked around, still a mess of emotions. He knew Happy was right, but he still needed to vent. Swinging around Tony punched and kicked at the wall, anger and fear making him lash out as he swung around and kicked out at the railing repeatedly. Tony bent over, breathing hard as he gripped the railing and hung his head.

"Are you done?" asked Happy calmly.

Tony squeezed his eyes close, giving voice to the terrifying reality he'd refused to give thought to until now. "Pepper was inside the Tower the whole time, wasn't she?"

Happy's reply was quiet. "Yes."

The confirmation cut through Tony like a knife. The horrifying reality was that he'd almost killed Pepper by his own hand and then God only knows what happened next. Whatever it was ended her up on the operating table. "Tell me everything," he ordered Happy raggedly.

"Hammer turned up at the Tower, he thought he had control of the whole thing. He made Pepper choose between telling you she was in the Tower or you getting the Avengers back from under the control of the nano-bots."

Tony's knuckles whitened as he gripped the metal railing so tightly all the blood left his hands. He wanted Hammer dead, he wanted him screaming and in pain and dead. "She chose me," he rasped.

"Pepper is always going to choose you, Tony."

A muscle in Tony's jaw ticked wildly as he tried to control himself. "She made the wrong call."

"Pepper doesn't think so and neither do I."

"What happened?" Tony croaked. "What happened next?" He turned to look at Happy, his eyes full of rage. "Did Hammer hurt her?" Tony didn't know how he got those words out without screaming.

Happy shook his head. "Pepper took charge. She made Hammer go with her to the arc reactor to shut it down. Lewis and I were in the garage and we got to the reactor first but your suit got in the way."

Tony frowned, suddenly realising what he meant. "My contaminated Mach VII?"

"Yeah, the nano-bots had it on shoot to kill. It took down Lewis and me."

Tony's eyes went wide. "And Pepper?" Oh God, the thought of one of his own creations hurting Pepper, it was unbearable.

"No," said Happy quickly. "Pepper went back and got into your hamster ball thingy. She came back and kicked its ass. The suit ended up in the arc reactor in a million pieces."

Tony's shoulders sagged in relief. "So, what happened? How did Pepper get hurt?" He knew that safety pod should have kept her safe, that was the whole point of the design. Where had he gone wrong? How had he failed Pepper in keeping her safe? It was an agonising wait for the answers from Happy.

"I wasn't conscious, but Lewis told me Hammer had gotten control of the nano-bots. They were all these silver tendril things and they were everywhere. They attacked the hamster ball with Pepper in it-"

"And they got through?" interrupted Tony in horror.

"No, Pepper was safe and then something happened and the nano-bots turned on Hammer and he fell off the walkway where he and Pepper were standing into the arc reactor."

Tony's lips thinned. "Hammer's dead?"

"Hammer is mincemeat," confirmed Happy. "Pepper then got out of the ball and pushed it into the arc reactor and that was what blew it up ultimately."

Tony's throat constricted. "And she was hurt in the explosion?"

Happy's face sobered. "She fell, boss. Pepper fell from the walkway and ended up impaled on a metal rod. By the time I came to, Lewis had already called the ambulance."

Tony's knees had gone weak and he crouched down, finding it hard to breathe as he still clung to the railing. "You should have told me," he said angrily through numb lips.

"I know," said Happy softly, "but Pepper made me promise not to. She knew you needed to focus on what was happening with the Avengers."

It hurt to hear those words and Tony shook his head, trying to ward them off.

"I stayed with her the whole time, right up until they took her to surgery," Happy reassured him as best he could. "I was there when she came out. The doctors are saying Pepper is going to be fine."

Tony stared at him, seeing something. "You're not telling me everything." He was scared to hear more, but more scared not to.

Happy made a regretful face. "There was more internal injury then they initially thought. When they went in to stop the bleeding, the surgeon ended up having to remove one of Pepper's ovaries."

Tony looked away, consumed with guilt and self-loathing. He'd caused permanent physical harm to Pepper, it was his greatest fear other than losing her completely. "Does-does she know?" he rasped.

Happy's face was drawn. "Yes."

Tony blinked back tears and blew out a shaky breath. "I did this to her."

"You know that isn't true, Tony."

Tony looked at him, angry again. "Isn't it? None of this would have happened to her if I wasn't in Pepper's life."

Happy shook his head at him. "Don't do that, don't play the 'what if' game, boss. There is no point."

Tony slowly straightened up and let go of the railing finally. He felt like he'd just taken the mother of all beatings. Tony was in agony from the inside out.

"Pepper wanted me to find you," said Happy, his voice low. "We didn't know you were in the hospital." He paused and frowned. "Why are you here?"

"Natasha," said Tony, staring at the ground in front of him. "She's in surgery."

Happy made a little gasp of surprise. "Is she going to be alright?"

"We don't know," said Tony truthfully. "We're all waiting for news." He looked over at Happy. "I have to be with Pepper."

"I'll wait with the others," offered up Happy quickly. "I'll let you know what is happening with Natasha." He stood up. "Go and be with Pepper, Tony, she needs you."

Tony nodded slowly. "What room is she in?"

"312."

Tony nodded again, feeling numb all over.

Happy walked over and patted him on the back reassuringly. "Everything is going to be alright, boss. Just go and be with her." With that, Happy walked back down the stairs, heading back to the other Avengers.

Tony walked the rest of the way up the stairs, suddenly scared of seeing Pepper now. He didn't know what he was going to do or say, there were too many emotions. All Tony knew was that he didn't want to upset Pepper. He wanted to get this right. Tony found Pepper's room and walked inside unchallenged by any of the night staff quietly scurrying around busily. He hated hospitals, but hospitals at night seemed especially unnerving. Pepper was neatly tucked into her bed, face turned away from the door. Tony moved forward carefully, not wanting to wake her if she was sleeping. He just needed to be near her and see for himself that she was alright. He walked up to the bed just as Pepper turned her head.

She looked up at him and her pale features registered relief and delight. "Tony," she whispered, "you're alright." She blinked back tears. "Thank God. I was so worried."

"Pepper." His voice cracked over her name. She was worrying about him through all of this? He wasn't the one lying in a hospital bed. Tony had a million things he needed to say to her but he couldn't find the words. "Pepper," he repeated hoarsely.

"It's okay, I'm okay," she tried to reassure him. "Don't be upset." Pepper reached out a hand and grabbed his, squeezing it tightly. "I'm alright, Tony, truly."

Tony wrapped both of his hands around Pepper's and hugged it to his chest. The same chest which was constricted with painful emotion. He sat down on the bed, still holding tight to her hand.

She smiled lovingly at him, obviously seeing he was overwhelmed. "It's okay," she repeated softly. "Everything is going to be okay."

Tony wanted to believe that but right then, he didn't know how. He bent down and buried his head into the crook of her neck, breathing in her scent and luxuriating in the softness of her skin. Tony had almost lost everything today and the realisation had him paralysed. "Pepper," he said raggedly, "Pepper."