Buffy

Buffy stands nervously in front of Willow's door. There's so much going on, that she can't even decide what to think about. Holding her breath, she knocks and waits for Willow to open the door."Willow? Can we talk?"

"I figured you'd be with Faith right now." Willow's face showing that she still held serious contempt for Faith and wasn't at all ready to give her a chance.

Buffy does her best to ignore the question and the dirty look and enters the room, trying to hold on to her original plan of gaining comfort and strength from her best friend. The look on Willow's face made her lose sight of that.

"I heard some of what you said to Faith in the hallway," Buffy says quietly.

Willow scowls. "So? Was anything I said wrong? Do I have any reason not to doubt her or to question how the hell you two are so friendly now?"

Buffy sighs, she didn't mean to come in here and attack Willow. She had just wanted to spend some time with her friend and maybe learn more about Tara. Willow's snide comment about Faith set her off. It was also more than a little difficult to forget that Willow had been very close to killing her not too long ago. "I know you haven't figured out Tara's powers yet. But she told you that you could trust Faith."

"Only because she didn't know her." Willow scowled in reply. Buffy rolled her eyes. She didn't know how to explain that Faith was different now. She knew with every fiber of her being that it was true, even if Faith didn't, even if no one else did.

"Was Tara ever wrong about people before?"

Willow frowned but shook her head.

"Faith was supposed to kill you."

"What?" Willow took a step back and held her hand to her chest in shock.

"You had to be stopped. You were going to..." She shakes her head. "I don't even know exactly. But the point is, she stopped you. She could have killed you easily, but she didn't. She gave you another chance."

"Why?"

"You'll have to ask her about that."

Willow frowned but said nothing in response.

"I know that it doesn't make sense. I can't possibly explain it. I always felt a connection to Faith. I just couldn't accept what it was. Now that I have…" Buffy smiles just thinking about what it's like to have Faith near her. "We can feel each other. We can send emotions through our connection."

"I think I saw that happen. Faith didn't seem too happy about it."

"She's still struggling with believing anyone could ever care about her."

Willow sighs, "we didn't give her much of a chance, did we?"

"No, we really didn't. I can't even believe it. Faith was all alone, how could we have just left her like that?" Buffy frowns, she had always felt like she was alone - like no one could possibly understand her. She had been so put-off by Faith's recklessness when they first met, that she never really considered that Faith was just as alone with her power as she was.

"We were just kids. I guess you both kinda still are." Willow frowns again.

"Yeah, I guess so. I'm not even sure how old I am now."

"Me neither, guess it doesn't so much matter, anymore."

"I don't know what's going to happen, but I think Tara was right. All three of us need to be together. That will only work if you can give her a chance. Do you think you can?" Buffy thought it was critical that more than just she gave Faith a chance. If Faith could see that other's believed in her, maybe she would finally start to believe in herself.

"I can try." Buffy smiled and wrapped Willow in a hug. A little bit of hope that everything was going to be OK was starting to grow.

"Willow!" Tara appears in the room, disrupting their bonding.

"Tara?"

"It's not her. Don't listen!" Buffy attempts to put herself between them, the First only shifts, reappearing even closer to Willow.

"How could you!? You let me die! I thought you loved me!" Tara is wailing and kneeling now at Willow's feet.

"I didn't mean to. I tried to save you!"

"You could still save me. You could still trade Buffy for me. I could still be yours."

Willow hesitated, her face fixed in a frown of agony. Buffy watched in terror as Willow's eyes flashed black. She felt totally impotent as she waited to see how Willow was going to react.

"I could have you back?" Willow asks a whimsical look on her face now.

"Willow! Stop! It's not Tara. Tara would never want you to do this!" Buffy had no idea if Willow could even hear her, but she had to try.

Willow closes her eyes, the pain, and fury evident on her face. Her whole body is tense. "No! I will not do this!" She screams and Tara giggles.

"It was worth a shot." The First shrugs, and it's even more evident that the real Tara is not behind those movements.

"What do you want!?" Buffy screams.

"Just having some fun." Tara grins and then transforms into Buffy. The real Buffy scowls, not enjoying that the First so frequently decides to appear as her.

Willow has devolved into a ball of misery, curled on the bed and muttering to herself.

"You know she was never what you thought she was. The only reason I was able to inhabit her was because she let me. Because she wanted me to."

"You lie!" Buffy didn't want to believe what the First was saying, even though she had a good feeling that it wasn't.

"I have never lied, not once."

Buffy scowled and tried to remember all the things the first said to her. She couldn't recall any particular outright lie. It was all misdirection and tricks. It had even tried to warn her that Willow was more powerful than she seemed.

"I don't care what she did, I know who she is, who she's supposed to be. I won't let her hurt anyone else, not even herself."

"Like you could stop her. If she decides to, she could destroy you without lifting a finger."

"You're terrified of her." Buffy finally makes sense of all the First's posturing.

"Hardly. She only had so much power because I gave it to her. She's barely anything now. At least not until I get her back on my side." That might be the first outright lie it's told. Why would it have allowed her to bring us out of that dimension if it was really all its power she was using?

Willow is starting to stir, bringing herself to standing. The air in the room is crackling with her energy. Buffy watches her and smiles. There is no darkness in her eyes, but the power radiating from her is evident.

The First stands, attempting to appear confident. Buffy can sense the fear, only because she knows her own body language so well. "Do you think I don't know about your little plan? I know everything you're going to do. I'm not the least bit worried. There's nothing you can do to stop me! You will never close the Hellmouth!" And there goes lie number two.

With one last furious glare, the First vanishes.

Willow

Willow relaxes and drops back down on to the bed.

"We really are going to win. Aren't we?" She quietly asks.

"We really are." Buffy grins and moves to sit beside her friend. "Let's get some rest. Big day tomorrow."

"Yeah." Willow frowns.

"Do you want me to stay with you tonight?"

Willow looks at Buffy and shakes her head. "You should be with Faith."

"I don't think that's what she wants. I'm trying to give her space. This stuff with our connection and all the emotion sharing is too confusing."

"I know I've never been a fan of Faith, and I have no idea what's changed. But there's clearly something between you two. Something you should figure out. Which you can only do together."

"It's just so confusing. I know I shouldn't be so wrapped up in her, but I just can't seem to stop. I should be worried about you, about the First, about the demons running the world, but I'm not worried about any of those things. I haven't forgotten all the things she did, I know she fell into darkness. I know she killed at least one human on purpose in order to help an evil demon. Yet I can't help but think there's more to her, that she's worth caring about. Maybe someone did do something to me. And don't even try to say it was Faith. If it was her she would be taking advantage of my insanity, but she hasn't. She's been totally amazing, and I've been a monster. I guess you probably don't remember this, but we slept together. That first night we were here. She wanted to leave, and I thought it might get her to stay or at least to come back. I don't know. Anyway, it was a mistake. Not that it wasn't amazing, but I should never have done that to her. I don't even know who she is. I'm not even sure who I am." Buffy finally stopped her tirade, standing in the middle of the room arms wrapped around herself, staring at the floor.

Willow had been watching quietly as Buffy was pacing around the room ranting, not wanting to interrupt, guessing that Buffy needed to let this all out of her system. She thought back to all the irrational and reckless things Buffy had done involving Angel and a lot of what she was saying started to make sense. Buffy loved with all of herself, she couldn't control it. She didn't think Buffy was ready to hear any of that though. She had to work through this with Faith, they had to figure it out for themselves.

Willow is torn. During their visit to the library, she had found material that Tara had gathered on auras. It was filled with notes, letting Willow know her theories on what was going on between the two slayers. Willow didn't quite understand it all, and mostly didn't want to believe what little bit she did understand. It was so much easier to focus on hating Faith than to think that maybe she wasn't as evil as she'd always believed. Willow could tell Buffy everything she'd found out, tell her that there was more to the relationship between the two slayers than they could even imagine. She wasn't quite ready to let go of her resentment and confusion over the situation.

She was heartbroken over losing Tara, and she still blamed both slayers for what had happened. Even though she knew logically that it wasn't their fault directly. Their inability to figure themselves out is what caused it to happen. She spent so much time believing that Faith was evil and had done something to Buffy, she knew she had to let go of it, she just didn't know how. If only Tara were still here. If only I had listened to her all those times she told me to let go of my anger. She always knew something was wrong with me. She tried so hard to help me keep under control. I can try to make up for it now. I will help them figure this out, and maybe make up for some of what I've done.

"Can you feel her right now?"

Buffy looks in the direction of Faith's room. Willow can see their auras swirling and reaching for each other. Again wishing that Tara was here, Tara would know more. Tara would know what the right thing to say was.

"Yeah, she seems... resolved. Calm."

"You should go to her, keep feeling for her, you'll know if she really doesn't want you to be there."

"I don't know if I would. I barely can feel her emotions, but it sounds like I'm hammering her with mine. I don't know what any of this means."

Faith

Faith stood in front of her closed door, waiting and wondering. She had decided that she wanted what Buffy was offering her. She just had to figure out how that was going to work.

Buffy was moving towards her now, slowly making her way down the hallway. She held her breath, and only released it once Buffy had moved beyond her own room and was approaching Faith's. Faith opened the door once she was within a few feet.

"Everything OK with Red?"

"I think so. At least as OK as it can be right now."

"Do you want to come in?"

"Only if you want me to, I'm sure you need some rest."

"Can't sleep anyway." Faith moved out of the doorway to allow Buffy to enter. Buffy moved to the far side of the room and stood awkwardly. Faith let the door close and moved to sit on the bed. Motioning for Buffy to sit with her. "You're making me nervous, come sit down."

Instead of sitting, Buffy begins to pace. "There's just so much I don't understand. The first said Willow willing let it control her. That she wanted it to. We have this plan, and I think it's going to work, I just don't know if we can trust her."

"We don't really have a choice, do we?"

"No, I guess not." Buffy stops moving, standing in the middle of the room facing away from Faith.

"What are you really worried about?"

"What's going to happen after we get the Hellmouth closed? It's not like things are going to be all normal and great after that. The whole world is a mess. Are we going to have to fight demons everywhere?"

Faith moves further onto the bed, leaning against the wall. "Come here."

Buffy turns to look at Faith. "No, I should just go. I.."

"Just come here." Faith insists. "Don't make me drag you."

Buffy finally relents and moves to the bed, sitting on the edge of it.

"Come closer, lay with me."

"No.. I can't."

"Why not?"

"I don't know."

Faith leans forward and reaches for Buffy's hand. Pulling her gently, "please."

Slowly Buffy lets herself be pulled towards Faith, eventually letting herself be held. Faith tries to relax, tries to let all the emotions she's feeling settle into something that makes sense. It's a lot to deal with. She wants to focus on the good things she's feeling. The warmth and comfort of having Buffy in her arms. She's distracted by the tension and fear radiating from Buffy.

"Try to relax. Everything is going to be ok."

"How? How is anything going to be ok."

"It just will. We're going to kick the First's ass. Then we're going kill all the demon's that get in our way."

"You said we."

"I did." Faith smiled, relieved that she wasn't terrified at admitting she was planning to stay by Buffy's side.

"So no more trying to leave?"

"I'm done running away."

Buffy sighs and finally starts to relax, letting her body mold to Faith's. Faith moves her hand to the small of Buffy's back, gently caressing the soft skin. Buffy reached for the edge of Faith's shirt.

"Can I?" She asks softly.

Faith hesitates. Say Yes! You want her to touch you, let her touch you! But she says nothing.

"It's ok," Buffy takes her hand away, resting it on her own leg.

Faith's hand had stilled on Buffy's back, after a few moments it began it's slow movements again. She reached over for Buffy's hand and directed it to its earlier position. Silently giving Buffy the permission she asked for.

Buffy's fingertips danced across the skin of her stomach and side. Faith was struggling not to moan and writhe under the amazing sensations. It was an emotional overload, and she was not prepared for it.

Buffy

Buffy can sense Faith tense and slows her movements. Resting her hand flat on Faith's side. I can't keep doing this to myself. No matter how much I want to be with her, I know that's not what she wants. She says she's not leaving, that will be enough. She'll be by my side as we set this world right.

"We should get some rest." She offers, "I'm going to go." Buffy starts to pull away, but Faith grabs her.

"No, please stay."

Buffy gently moves out of Faith's grip. "This is too confusing. Being with you feel so right, but it hurt so much that you don't feel the same way. I don't know how to handle this right now." She stands up, but Faith grabs her from behind and pulls her back onto the bed. "Please, let me go. I'll find a way to deal if you don't want to be with me. But I need to go."

She's squirming in Faith's arms, but not really fighting to get free. She was tired, and her heart ached. Suddenly she stills as Faith begins lightly kissing her neck. "Don't." She quietly moans. Faith doesn't stop. Her kisses become more and more insistent.

"Faith." Her voice is a whisper. She wants to tell Faith to stop. She just can't. She's being overloaded with sensations. Realizing that Faith for the first time is sending feelings over their slayer connection. The emotions are confused and conflicted. She can tell Faith is trying to be comforting, but maybe doesn't know how. Buffy took this as a sign that Faith did want them to be together, she knew it was going to be hard. It's not like Buffy had it all figured out, she just knew that they were better together, that they could be happy once they figured this all out.

"Do you want me to stop?" Faith asks as she continues to kiss and nip her way along Buffy's neck and shoulder. Buffy can only moan in response. There is no chance of words being formed. Buffy lets herself be pulled back into their earlier position. Their arms wrapped around each other and Buffy's head resting on Faith's shoulder.

"Can we... just stay like this? Get some sleep?" Buffy asks, she's not ready to deal with her swirling emotions, she just wants to bask in the warmth and comfort of Faith.

"Definitely." Faith places a kiss on Buffy's forehead and holds her close. It doesn't take long until both slayers fall asleep.