CHAPTER 6
"San, do you want another pizza?" Quinn offers Santana.
Santana sits between Sugar and Quinn while Brittany is in front of her. Brittany always eats in a quiet manner while Sugar talks non-stop as per usual.
Santana smiles at Quinn and nods her head. Quinn gives her another slice.
Brittany rolls her eyes, "For a short guy like you, you sure have a big appetite." she comments.
Santana's cheeks goes red. She doesn't know why. Now that Brittany knows her secret, they should be friends now right? They are both girls anyway. Brittany hates guys and she's not a guy.
She wants to be close to Brittany. She really wants to. The blonde is really mysterious. She wants to get to know her more deeply.
And she doesn't want someone hating her. That is a valid reason right?
"You're blushing San. You're really so cute, you know!" Quinn pinches Santana's cheeks.
Sugar chokes. Her eyebrows furrow on Quinn's sweet gesture to the guy.
Brittany stands up, making the spoon and fork create noise that made the three of them look at her.
Santana looks at her in awe. She wants to follow Brittany but she stops herself. She doesn't want to upset the blonde again by constantly following her around.
Sugar observed the whole scene and she was positively sure something is going on. "Okay. What was that?" she comments.
"What?" Quinn asks in return.
"Something is going on with Brittany and I wondered if San here is still the cause?" Sugar narrows her eyes at their 'guy' member.
"I don't know. Maybe she still doesn't like me." Santana said in a sad tone.
"You better get out of her way, Santino. I'm warning you. I'm always on her side." Sugar said, in her best warning tone voice.
Santana lowers her head. She really feels bad now, she doesn't want Sugar to be mad at her too.
Quinn looks at Santana's sorrowful face. She pats the back of Santana to make her feel better.
Santana smiles simply in return.
SANTANA
"Thanks for accompanying me and Jolie again. I think she loves you already." Sugar said that makes me smile. I pat Jolie's head and she licks my hand in return. "I'm just wondering." Sugar continues, "She usually hated guys but surprisingly, she likes you San."
My eyes widen in guilt, "Guess I… I don't know. She likes me as much as I like her?" I said.
"Well, maybe. Anyway, I have to take a shower now. See you later." Sugar said and walk towards the house.
I kiss Jolie and whispers to her, "Don't tell them my secret."
The dog barks in return which made me giggle. I walk towards the house with a big smile on my face.
Sugar and I spent the whole morning walking and jogging around the village. And I'm glad we're getting closer now. Sugar is friendly and very funny, she made me laugh uncontrollably with her funny antics.
The personality of the three A N JELL are very much different. Sugar is the funny and friendly one. Quinn is kind and sweet. Brittany? Hmmm. Brittany is different from the two. She is mysterious.
Like right now. I can't help but to stare at her while she's doing her early dance work-out routine inside the gym room alone.
Her body moves in a very sensual manner that I can't help but to stare at her sexy body. Oh did I said the word 'sexy'? Well, it's not bad to appreciate other people's assets right? She has this amazing abs that even if you don't want to look, you can't help it. And I certainly can't help it.
It had been my routine to take a peek at Brittany dancing every morning. I admired how she moved and I can't help but to watch.
"Do you have a crush on Britt?"
"Huh? Wh-what?" I turn around and saw Sugar looking at me, crossing her arms.
"I repeat. Do you have a crush on Brittany?" Sugar repeats that makes me blush even more.
"Why would you think that?" I ask, walking away from her.
Sugar follows behind me. "Well, it's been a week. You're always here, watching her dance."
"Huh? I… uhm… It's not… I just admire her dancing skills." I stutter. I don't know why I'm nervous right now.
"I hate to remind this to you San. But you know that the three of us are lesbians right?" Sugar said that made me look at her in confusion. "You're not paying attention when I told you before?"
They are lesbians? So it means that they are attracted to…
"We are attracted to girls. We date girls. We like girls." Sugar said, as if reading her mind.
I fought the urge to make the sign of the cross. Is that even possible? I mean, they are all gorgeous. How could they not like boys? "Why?" I ask Sugar.
Sugar combs her hair with her fingers. "We all went to an all-girls school and we just happened to like girls. And we have a wide range of lesbian fans, even straight girls, and we all love the attention they're giving us."
My eyebrows furrowed. My heart beats faster than it should. I breathe deeply and ask. "How do you know you're attracted to girls? I mean… Uhm.. To your same kind?"
Sugar looks at me and she scratches her neck, "Well, for me I really like girls. They kiss nice. They have soft lips, soft body… They're different. I love kissing girls. Boys are gross. No offense to you though."
"Oh… None taken." I said, waiting for her to continue. "Then?" I encourage.
"Hmmm… my heart beats faster whenever I see a girl I'm attracted to. Like I just want to see the girl smile and I want to be the reason of that smile. I can't help thinking about her. And I always imagine myself with her." Sugar rambles but my mind went overdrive.
I want to see Brittany smile and I want to be the reason of that smile. I'm always thinking of her. Sometimes I imagine myself with her.
As a friend, right? I'm just thinking of her as a friend right, right?
But how come my heart beats faster whenever I see her, her blonde hair and blue eyes always captivates me.
"Hey are you even listening?" Sugar said, poking me on my cheek.
"Oh. Yeah. I'm listening." I said, Sugar's finger stays on my cheek.
"Hey, for a guy like you, you sure have a soft cheeks like us girls do." Sugar said that made my eyes widen.
I'm struggling for words when I heard someone clears her throat behind me.
"Some guys have soft cheeks too, Sugar. That's not impossible."
I turn around just to see Brittany wiping her face with her towel, then her eyes shifts into mine. I want to say thanks to her for saving me an explanation but she walks away after giving me a bored look.
I didn't realize that my heart beats triple fast when Brittany appeared out of nowhere.
Unconsciously, I touch the left side of my chest. This isn't what I think it is, right?
A knock on the door wakes me up from my sleep. I glance at my watch and I find out that it's only 9 in the evening. The knock on my door continues that I have to force myself to stand up.
I check on myself first as I no longer wear my binder that covers my breasts.
"Santino! Open the door!" Sugar calls out.
I decide not to wear the binder. Anyway, my pajama is big enough to cover my whole body.
"Hey." I greet as soon as I open the door.
"Come on, we're having a private pool party." Sugar, in her pink robe, tugs my hand.
"What? Pool party?" I ask, rubbing my eyes.
"Yeah. So, just wear your trunks and come join us outside. Hurry up okay?" Sugar said then walks away.
Trunks? Pool? Party?
I'm doomed!
I walk slowly, taking my time, I'm so nervous I don't know if I can handle it. I hug my robe for dear life. I don't know if I can handle this situation.
"Hey San. What took you so long?" Sugar calls out.
She and Quinn are sitting by the pool side and I notice that Quinn widen her eyes at the sight of me. I wonder why.
"Why did you invite San with us?" Quinn said as she glares at Sugar. "You should have let him rest." she said then walk towards me.
I can't help but to stare at her body, with that green 2-piece bikini of hers, she looks perfectly beautiful.
"I thought you're sleeping already? It's okay if you don't want to join us." Quinn said as she looks at my robe. Suddenly, I feel self-conscious. What is she looking at?
I want to go back, of course. It's my chance to escape. "Oh. Is it okay if I go back? I'm really tired." I said.
But then Sugar appears in front of me wearing a pink bikini. She looks sexy and perfect too.
Good thing. Brittany isn't here. Or else I won't be able to handle it, I think.
"No San, join us. It would be fun." Sugar tugs my arm and she scrunches her nose annoyingly to Quinn.
Quinn grabs my other arm and glares at Sugar. "Didn't you hear what he just said? He is tired so just let it go and let him rest, Sugar." she said in a serious tone that made Sugar flinched.
But then I heard a splash sound coming from the pool. My eyes flew on that direction.
Oh. My. G…. Oops I can't say the name of the Lord in vain… But the sight is just so amazing! She is amazing. Brittany S. Pierce. She's like a goddess coming out of the pool.
My jaws drop at the sight of her in her royal blue bikini. Her wet blonde hair. Those captivating blue eyes. Those thin pinkish lips. I immediately take away my eyes from her breasts, instead my eyes linger on her legs. Those legs that seems to go on and on.
Oh.
I felt Sugar elbowed me. Then she whispers, "Close your mouth."
I blush furiously as I literally close my mouth. I cough awkwardly to add an effect.
"Why are you here? Aren't you supposedly be sleeping right now? We have rehearsals for tomorrow. I don't need an incompetent member of this group. You have a lot to learn to cope up with us." Brittany said, with a bored look on her face.
"But-" Sugar tries to reason out.
"No buts Sugar." Brittany turn around then walks away. I can't help but to stare at her butt now. Then to my surprise, she turn around. Oh boy, she caught me staring at her butt! "Besides, I don't want the company of a guy whose practically undressing me with his eyes."
My jaw drops again. Literally. She knows that I'm checking her out!
"I'm sorry for dragging you into this, San." Sugar said, apologetically. "I just want the four of us to spend time together."
I look at Sugar and I know she really felt bad. Without thinking, I caress her face with my right hand and force her to look at me. "It's okay. Don't feel bad." I whisper softly.
I notice her stiffen with my sudden movement. I drop my hand instantly. "Oh, I'm sorry." I murmured then I turn around and walk away from them.
BRITTANY
"What is taking him so long?" Sugar mumbles.
I cross my legs as I ignore what she said.
"Like really? Can someone knock at his door and wake him up?" Sugar continues.
I flip the page of the book I'm reading. "Why don't you go there and ask him yourself?" I said in a bored tone then I took a sip on my coffee.
"I don't want to go there." Sugar replied immediately. I wonder what's going on with her. She seems a little distracted even last night. "I'm just concerned. I mean, he needs to eat breakfast before going to rehearsals right?"
Quinn motions to stand up but I beat her out of it without thinking. Shit. What's going on with me?
"I'll go to his room." I said, trying to avoid Quinn's stare.
As I walk towards 'his' room, I can't help but shiver at the thought of her, probably sleeping without her binder on. I don't want to entertain dirty thoughts but I just can't make them go away!
I knock.
No answer.
I breathe deeply. "Hey! Wake up!" I scream while continuously knocking on the door.
I heard footsteps coming and then the door opens.
And. Oh. My. Fucking. Shit.
She looks fucking hot! Her pajama top reveals small amount of cleavage, yeah I saw them because I'm taller so I'm looking down at her, and I can't help but notice that she has nice boobs! Lucky binder!
"Hi. Good morning." Santana said in a raspy voice as she looks at me, then she might have notice me staring at her boobs, she immediately looks down and covers herself.
Due to the embarrassment I felt, I switch on my bitch mode again. I push her inside and I heard her gasp as my fingers made in contact with her arm.
"Wha-"
I cut her off as soon as I lock the door behind me. "You are so damn lucky I was the one who saw you in that state, Santana!" Santana? Hmmm, it felt so good to say her name. God, what am I thinking?!
"Huh?" She looks at herself again with that innocent look on her beautiful face.
She looks at me like I am speaking alien to her.
"Damn it! Don't open the door without wearing your binder on. Otherwise don't open it without wearing your bra!" I finally said, I could feel my cheeks reddened like a tomato.
And then I saw her blush and I felt the need to restrain myself or otherwise I might kiss her right here, right now.
I wonder when did I start feeling like this towards her? When I thought she was a guy, I've been asking myself, am I bisexual? Coz apart from her posing as a clumsy guy that irritates me, if I were to be honest, I've kinda notice her at that time. But I didn't gave too much attention on that before because I know I'm only attracted to girls. Anyway whatever. She is going to be a nun! I can't have this dirty thoughts about her!
Santana turn her back away from me, "Why are you here?" she softly asked.
Again, I was distracted by the sight of her sexy neck. Why did she had to cut her hair short thus exposing one of my weakness? Snap out of it Brittany. You can't fall for her!
I clear my throat, "I just want to tell you that I won't back you up anymore. You have to be careful next time. Last night, you showed up wearing a robe? What was underneath that robe huh? A bikini?"
"No. Of course not." Santana shakes her head, "I'm wearing this scuba diving outfit that I saw inside my closet."
"Really? You're smarter than I thought." I said, impressed by her thinking.
"Brittany?" she said as she turn to face me.
I was caught off guard by her brown eyes as she looks directly at me. "What?" I ask.
"Do you… like girls too… like Sugar?" she asks that made me furrow my eyebrows at her sudden interest. She didn't know?
Nevertheless, I answer her question. "Yes."
"Do you have a girlfriend? I was just wondering, I mean. I'm just curious and all… but you don't have to-"
"I don't have a girlfriend right now." I said. "I never had one. I don't do relationships." I said in a monotone voice. "It will just ruin my career."
"But you like them?" she asks again.
"Yup. I had flings before but ever since the A N JELL became famous, I don't have time anymore."
Silence.
Our eyes meet.
No one dare to speak.
Then Santana 'fucking' lick her lips in front of me but in an innocent way. Like, it was just an habit, nothing more.
But my goddamn thoughts went overdrive at that simple gesture.
"Did you have a boyfriend before you decided to become a nun?" I ask, breaking the silence that surrounded us earlier.
She shakes her head. "No."
Our eyes linger again for a while and my heart beats faster again. I don't think I can handle this. She has to go! I turn my back from her and headed towards the door, "Next time you make mistake, I won't help you anymore. If Sue discovers about you being a girl, she'll definitely kick you out of the band. So be careful if you want to stay longer here. For your twin brother." I twist the door knob. "Prepare yourself and go down to eat breakfast. We're having a video taping rehearsal for MTV awards. Don't make us wait long." My voice is back from being cold again.
As soon as I went out of her room, I breathe. Phew. I'm saved.
SANTANA
"A pool scene?" My eyes widen.
"Oh, I haven't told you this morning? It must have slipped on my mind." Brittany said, her eyes teasing. Then she leans into me and whispers against my ear, "What will you do now, Santino?"
I swallow hard. I'm doomed. Her hot breath made my knees weak. What is happening to me?
Will arrives out of nowhere and grabs my arm. "I need to talk to you, Santino."
I saw how Brittany smirks and I know right then and there, I will be caught.
Forgive me, brother. I'm about to ruin your chance to become a rockstar.
I close my eyes.
"Santana!" William said.
I open my eyes just to see that I'm already inside the dressing room.
"Put this on." he said.
"What is this?" I ask.
"A suit."
"But I thought it will be a pool scene? And I have to wear trunks?" I ask, my mind confuse.
"Well, the production designer is a good friend of mine, so I suggested something and they liked the idea and made some changes." Will smile, obviously pleased at himself.
I let out a deep breath. Phew.
With my white suit, that covers my entire body, (thank God!) I walk towards Sugar. She is wearing a white dress. Not a swimsuit. Thank goodness.
"Hey." I greet. "What's wrong?"
She looks severely bothered.
"I don't like this dress. We're on a fucking swimming pool and we have to dress like this?!" she exclaims. "How inconvenient!"
I shrugged my shoulders. "Well, it looks good on you." I comment and Sugar's eyes widen.
Then she avoids my eyes. And she's blushing too. "Thanks." she said softly. "I have to go. See you later." then she run away.
What's wrong with her?
"And then you're saved again. Lucky girl."
I turn around to see Brittany looking like an angel… princess… goddess. Oh boy, she looks gorgeous.
I'm pretty sure that my mouth is gaping at her.
"You're…. beautiful…" I said softly. Oh! Did I said that out loud?
"I know." she said then smirks at me. "You're literally devouring me."
I close my mouth and I'm also sure that my cheeks are red. "I'm not." I said quickly.
Brittany touches my chin and as her fingers touch my skin, it burns. "You should close your mouth every time you look at me." she said softly, seducing me with her eyes. Oh boy, did I say the word 'seduce'? Why would she? I'm straight. And a future nun. Why is she flirting with me? And why is my heart beats faster again?
I turn away from her. "I'm not doing that." I said firmly.
"Well then… it's good to know that. Coz I'm not interested anyway." she said then walk away.
And then I felt like my heart is broken. Why am I hurting?
She's not interested. With me. That should be okay, right?
It's not that I'm interested with her. I don't even like girls. Even boys.
"Okay! Where are my A N JELLs?" the director said in a loud voice.
I walk towards him with a heavy heart.
"Santino! You should do it like this. You should dive in the water naturally. No not like that. Don't hold your breath. Be natural." the director repeats his words over and over and I have to dive in and out. I can't do it right. I'm exhausted already.
Brittany, Quinn and Sugar did their stunt right and I was left here repeating the stunt over and over.
There is a photo shoot going on and they have to go there after this scene. I can't ruin the entire schedule.
I'm already breathing heavily and my eyes are already red.
A splash on my side made me turn right. "What the-?"
"I will teach him." Brittany said directly to the director as she gets inside the pool again with me.
My eyes lock at hers.
Her hands on my hips. "You have to do this correctly. I want to go home early and we need a group photo shoot. With you present of course." she rolls her eyes. "Now, get in the water slowly. Don't make it to obvious that you breathe before diving in. Act natural. Then come back, look at the camera and don't struggle." she said. "Now do it. Don't rush."
And I did what she said.
"Good shot!" The director screams. "Thank god! You finally did it!" then he screams, "It's a wrap! Finally!" then the crew start to pack their things.
Brittany gets out of the pool. She smiles at me. Then walks away, carrying a towel with her.
"Wait!" I scream, getting out of the pool too. I'm not that tall so it took me few seconds before I manage to climb up. I'm not good at swimming. This is the reason why I can't perfect the scene because I struggle most of the time.
She stops and looks at me.
"I just want to say thanks." I said, breathing heavily.
She didn't say anything. She just nod then she walks away again.
I follow her behind. We are now alone because the crew left, as fast as they can. Maybe they're already tired and hungry. Like me.
"Wait up." I said but she just continue walking, ignoring me.
I walk fast and suddenly I trip. Oh shit!
BRITTANY
I heard a big splash of water and that made me turn around.
"Santana!" I scream. She's now at the middle of the pool struggling to swim. She doesn't know how to swim! Oh shit!
I dive in and swim as fast as I can…
"Santana! Santana!" I shake her shoulders.
"I'm okay." she coughs. "I'm okay. Thank you." she said, tears welled in her eyes.
She hugs me and I can't help but to hug her back. I was so scared seeing her like that. I thought something bad will happen to her.
I shake my head. I won't allow that.
I push her slowly and lift her chin. "Are you really alright?" I said.
I can see that her breathing is uneven.
She nods her head.
And then our eyes meet.
Dark orbs meet mine.
I'm already mesmerize.
My eyes went down on her parted lips. Oh! They look soft. And inviting.
I lift my eyes on hers again and I notice her looking at my lips too.
My self-control fades. Oh god! I'm going to regret this!
I lean in and capture her parted lips.
My mind swirl as I taste her lips for the first time.
Her lips were unmoving. Mine were eager to taste her.
The warmth of her lips. The softness of them.
But still, no movement. I open my eyes for a while and I saw her eyes thoroughly closed, like she was savoring my kiss.
Does she want this?
I'm about to pull away when her lips move against mine.
Oh god.
She mirrors the movement of my lips earlier.
Now that I think of it, she doesn't know how to kiss.
She just follows my lead.
I open my mouth and I felt her shiver when I brush my tongue against her lips.
She pulls away. Her eyes wide like saucers.
"I…. uhm… I gotta go…" she stammers.
She stands up and walks away, leaving me speechless.
Did I scare her?
I did scare her.
I comb my hair with my fingers.
What have I done?
I am evil. I shouldn't have done that.
To a future nun. For god's sake!
Crap!
I touch my lips and close my eyes.
My heart beats erratically.
Oh shit!
This won't happened again! I scold myself.
Never.
Never with Santana.
She's off limits.