hey everyone... i'm sorry to have made you wait again for an update hope you are doing good, and I hope every one down in Texas survives through the issues that happening down there i wish i could help you, sending good vibes and hopes for everyone struggling out there
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Tom sat in shock as he watched Lucius and Severus leave his office, he had no idea that the simple request that both he and Fenrir keep the Mateship a secret would cause so much trouble in the future. The last thing he wanted to do was make his son distrustful of him, he just wanted Nathair to discover his love of Fenrir on his own. Besides the fact that it was magically safer, he didn't want his son to feel like he was being backed into a corner, much like Dumbledore had been trying to do to him when Tom saved him. Now that freedom was being perceived as control, as though he was lying to Nathair so he could control him.
Tom was at a loss, he had no idea how he was going to talk to his son, convince him that his lies of omission weren't to hurt him, weren't to do anything but protect him. At least with Lucius's offer to keep Nathair at their manor, to watch over him, gave him time, time to work out a plan. Then he realized that was the problem, that he was planning how to deal with his son, that he needed a plan to fix what was now broken.
The night was long for Tom, sleep evaded him, guilt gnawing at him the whole night. But when morning came he knew what he had to do, what his heart told him to do.
Flooing over to Malfoy manor, Tom knew it was early and that it was unlikely anyone but Severus would be up at six in the morning, but he wanted right his wrong as soon as he could. Just as he predicted the elf that popped in front of him to greet him told him that only Severus was up and was currently working in his lab, but that Narcissa and Lucius had just woke and were getting prepared for the day.
Thanking the elf, Tom went to Severus's lab, he and Severus had been close friends, nearly brothers, more so than he and Lucius despite that they had known each other longer. When Severus had joined him, Tom had felt connected to the half blood, their childhoods had been so similar and they connected almost immediately, thinking alike. They, with their knowledge of how muggles truly could be, knew better than the purebloods the very real threat that muggles posed to their world, and not just the muggles. The muggle borns were just as dangerous as their muggle relatives. When they joined the wizarding world, their parents were told too, and there was nothing to stop them from telling whoever they wanted too. Then there were the muggle borns themselves, they were too comfortable in the muggle world that once they finished Hogwarts they simply returned to the muggle world rather than staying in the magical one. But they did plenty of damage to the magical one while they were their, dismissing centuries old traditions like Yule and Wizards like Dumbledore bending over backwards to make them at home by changing the ancient Yule name and customs to the muggle version, Christmas. A holiday based on a religion that called for and caused death to many witches and muggles who were accused of witchcraft.
When Tom got to Severus's private potions lab, he wasn't sure he wanted to see and talk to his old friend. Severus had been so angry at Tom when he and Lucius had come to see him the day before, Tom didn't know if his friend would still be angry at him, sure he would be angry at him, Tom just didn't know how angry he still was. A short knock on the door and Tom walked into Severus's lab, Severus was bent over a cauldron looking into it with an intense glare.
"Problems?" Tom asked, trying to joke and lighten the air.
"My Lord... what are you doing here?" Asked Severus as he took his eyes off of the potion and turned them to the man in the doorway.
"I came here to talk to you before going to talk to Nathair," said Tom as he shut the door behind him. "Has Draco ever been truly angry at you?"
"Yes, once," said Severus as he took the cauldon off the table and carried it over to a set of large sinks, and dumping it in one of the sinks. "When he was very young and learned that I wasn't really his father despite me being their all through his life, not to mention the way he found out. He was thinking that I was really hurting Narcissa, that I had taken Lucius away from her and that I had hurt her. He refused to listen to reason, from any of us. It was only after a nightmare, one where I left him, then Lucius and Narcissa left him and he was all alone. I was up late that night, by some chance I heard him screaming in his sleep. I was the one to wake him up, to comfort him after, then it was like it never happened. He was back to calling me daddy and acting like nothing had happened to stop him from calling me that."
Severus grew somber, his black eyes darkening even more, as he told his story, and Tom could tell that he had struck a very real nerve. That Draco not loving him, turning away from him, was a fear he had, and one that he still feared.
"I never knew that," said Tom as he rested a hand on one of Severus's shoulders in a comforting grip.
"I was after your destruction, were we're all floundering in its wake. One of the older children of another of your followers was angry, at us, for whatever reason and used Draco to hurt us by telling him. That happened along time ago," said Severus brushing away his own concerns.
"I never meant for anything like that to happen. Until that night I never truly dreamed the Dumbledore would hurt someone that badly, kill anyone, light or dark."
"I know Tom. None of us blamed you for what happened, I know Nathair doesn't. I doubt that Lily or James would either, they knew that Dumbledore would try and hurt them for leaving him, they believed in what you were trying to do. They even loved you, and I don't doubt that they love you even more for taking their son away from the clutches of their killer, for bringing him home to people who will really love him, not ones that would use him of their own gain."
"Just to convince Nathair of that," said Tom as he looked down, overwhelmed by the things that Severus had said to him.
"He will forgive you, it might take time, but he will forgive you. He loves you, that's why it's hurting him so. When you first brought him back here, told him the truth, he was hurt, but not as hurt as this. It didn't hurt him badly because he didn't love them, but he loves you, which is why I know he will forgive you. Come, breakfast will be ready soon and Draco will make sure he comes down to eat."
"I wish I could be so certain," Tom said as Severus and he left the lab and headed for the dining room.
"You can't be my Lord, otherwise you would know the future and we will win the war and then have nothing to do because that was all we want to do."
A short burst of laughter escaped Tom at Severus dry wit, elevating the sadness that was tainting his mind. Nearing the dining room Tom pulled himself together, willed himself to be strong, strong enough to deal with his son.
Nathair wasn't in the dining room when Tom and Severus entered it, Lucius was thumbing through the Daily Prophet and huffing at the stupidity he found in it's pages. Narcissa on the other hand was chatting with one of the kitchen house elves about the Yule feasts, and the balls they threw every year as one of the wealthiest pureblood families, as was expected of them. Not only did they throwing the annual public one, they also threw an annual private one for the dark side, for their friends, but this year would be even more important than the previous years. Most of their people they rescued from Azkaban two years before had healed enough to be around other people, to enjoy their freedom, be allowed some happiness again.
Seeing Tom walk in Narcissa ordered the house elf she was talking to to get another place set for Tom, not even bothering to ask if he was planning to stay, let alone eat.
Sitting down at the newly made place, Tom talked with his three friends, occasionally taking a bite of food while he waited for Nathair and Draco to come down for breakfast. The wait while long, didn't feel very long to Tom, nervousness, had unsettled him and made him feel like time had been flying by when he heard Draco and Nathair walking down the hall, softly talking to each other. To say Tom was prepared to talk to Nathair would have been a joke, for any preparedness he had went right out the window when it actually came time for him to use it.
As Nathair came into the room Tom stood, while he didn't want to stop Nathair from eating or ruin his appetite he didn't think he could wait, and even if he did he was sure Nathair wouldn't want to wait any longer than he did.
Nathair, even though he hadn't really eaten the night before, still he had no appetite to be heard of. And if he did have one, it would have disappeared when he and Draco went into the dining room, and right there was his father. He had been expecting his father to show up, and while part of him wanted that to be later rather than sooner he knew it was a good thing that his father had shown up so soon, it meant he wanted to save them, save their relationship.
Breaking the silence that had fallen over the room first Nathair said, "why don't we go somewhere else, somewhere private, where we can talk."
"Sure Nathair."
"Uncle Lucius, can we use your office?"
"Of course, take all the time you need," said Lucius as he looked between the two of them, concern brewing in his eyes.
Nathair turned away and headed out of the room, going back down the hall towards Lucius's office, not bothering to see if his father was following him. Nathair was so inside his head, his was so preoccupied that he almost walked right past Lucius's office. Taking a step back he pushed the door open and walked into Lucius's office. Normally the room was warm, inviting, not anything like the office Lucius used to meet people in, this office was more like a study. The office Lucius used, specifically to meet people in, was cold, hard, it was made to intimidate people, to give Lucius an edge over whoever he met with. But now the room felt unfamiliar, Nathair wanted to be somewhere comfortable when he talked to his father, but now he was regretting his choice, now the room felt nothing like it usually did. Sitting down in one of the stuffed chairs Nathair turned and watched his father close the door behind him and take a seat himself.
"I didn't think, or rather I didn't know how to think. When we found out, the night he first met you, we didn't know each other. It took us time to get to know each other and by the time we came to be what we are now, a family, it had already been decided and I didn't think it needed to be changed."
"Why not tell me though, why not when we talked about magical creatures, I all but asked you and you knew. You knew we were Mates, that I would need to know at some time, why?" Nathair all but cried out as he sat shaking in his seat, whether it was in rage or sadness neither were sure of.
"I didn't think it was time, besides that night, when we decided, I wanted you to love him on your own, not to be completely forced into yet another thing against your will. I will admit that it wasn't the best decision I've made and I do regret how hurt you've been but I can't help but think that you wouldn't have been happy if I told you after you came with me. When you came with me you were so angry with Dumbledore and the Weasley's not to mention your aunt and uncle that I think it would have been unfair to tell you something else about your life that wasn't in your control. Either way we have to live with the decisions that have been made and hopefully move on," said Tom as he looked at Nathair with sloum eyes, trying hard to fix this broken thing between them before it broke too far apart to be brought back together. "I don't want you to take this out in Fenrir, this was my choice and he agreed for the very reason that he knew he would have you fully as his Mate one day and wanted it to be easy on you."
"I won't father. I might not be happy with either of you right now but I know that he, as my Mate, wouldn't intentionally harm me. And will forgive you but I'm still hurt and I just need some time. But will ask this of you father, don't hide things from me. Don't hurt me like this again."