Chelsea made it to the club just in time for their 9:00 am reservation. Her grandpa was already at the table waiting for her. He could tell she was upset and the first thing he asked was "Spencer?" she nodded. They ordered off the menu. Chelsea didn't think she was up to standing in the buffet line this morning. Over breakfast, what little she actually ate, she told her grandpa about yesterday. How it had gone from the best Valentine's Day ever to her broken heart. Bob listened to the story and was sorry to hear that things were not working out with them. He could tell that Chelsea was in love with him by how often she mentioned it wasn't his fault. She really didn't want him to be upset at Spencer.
Bob was hoping they would still work it out. They really did seem like a good couple. After she was finished he told Chelsea, "Maybe things will still work out. You did probably scare him with the thought of marriage and kids. He might come around after thinking about it for a while." He paused for a minute and a big smile was on his face. "Sometimes people surprise you."
Chelsea thought about that comment and said, "Yeah, they sometimes shock the hell out of me," sounding disgusted. She was thinking about the unsubs that Spencer went after not Spencer himself. She wasn't sure why her grandpa was smiling until she turned around to follow his gaze. There was Spencer looking a bit sheepish walking towards them with both of his hands in his pockets. Her grandpa stood up and shook his hand. "I think you young people need to be alone, Chelsea, I'm fine here, go ahead and talk to Spencer."
-#-
Last night when Spencer had left Chelsea's building he felt numb. He didn't want to walk to the Metro and the thought of sitting on the subway trying not to cry didn't help. He hailed a cab and went back to his apartment. It felt more empty than usual. He drew himself a bath and started to think about what she had said. He was angry with himself for hurting her. He had heard her crying and he knew that was completely his fault. She had been so nice when he left. Between the tears she told him it wasn't either of their faults and she would make sure she told her grandpa that. He was sure Bob wouldn't be angry with him, but he should be. It was his fault. He should have never let it go this far. He always knew it wouldn't end well, but he continued to see Chelsea because he was selfish. He loved being with her and didn't want it to stop. As he sat in the tub, he came to the realization that not only did he love being with her. He loved her. Dr. Spencer Reid was in love. He didn't know how to handle that. It was best he had left before he told her that. She was going to be better off without him.
He didn't even bother trying to sleep. He knew that sleep would never come. He sat in his favorite chair and picked up a book. He couldn't even concentrate on reading. He looked over at a small stack of books on the side table. He had purchased them when he took Chelsea to his favorite used bookstore. The memory made him smile. He was miserable without her. But the thought of marriage terrified him. Not to mention kids. She had said she didn't care if she had any biological kids. Unconsciously, that was how he always thought he could get out of the relationship. He figured she would want kids, find out he couldn't have any and leave him. But she didn't leave him. He had refused to even think of marriage and had left. How could he fix this?
-#-
Chelsea looked up at Spencer. She didn't see what they needed to talk about. He was very clear what he wanted or more specifically what he didn't want last night. She didn't want to be one of those couples that continued to see each other and have the same argument over and over again. She got up and looked at Spencer "I'm not going out to that bench today. It's raining." She sounded even gruffer than she had meant to sound. But she really was still upset and couldn't figure out why he had interrupted her breakfast.
Spencer winced at the comment; they had started their relationship out on that bench. He nodded and led her over to the bar area. They were overlooking the firing range, but there didn't seem to be any activity down there today.
Spencer looked at her and told her he was sorry. She started to speak, but he asked her to let him finish. He spoke very softly, almost in a whisper, but looking directly at her. He told her he had never felt this way about anyone before in his life and it scared him. So many people in his life had abandoned him. His father first and Gideon, but he also felt abandoned by his mother. He knew that wasn't fair, she was ill, but she had not been there for so many of his accomplishments or when he was hurt or in trouble that it felt like she had left him also. He didn't know if he could take that again.
Chelsea's anger faded a little. "I'm scared too." She said, "I've never wanted to go out with someone more than a couple of dates before and here I am thinking about spending the rest of my life with you." She took a deep breath and tried to concentrate on the correct words. "Spencer, I know we've only been going out for about six weeks, and I didn't want to freak you out, but I needed to know that you felt the same way. That maybe we could have a future together. I wasn't asking for you to make a commitment or a marriage proposal. Do you understand that?"
He nodded, "I did as you called it, freak out. I'm sorry. I really didn't even realize how much you meant to me until I lost you."
"You didn't lose me. That is if you do think we can work this out, I'm right here."
Spencer's voice cracked, "Every day I'm afraid you will find out the real me and want to run away. It's hard to make future plans when you don't think there is a future."
Chelsea surprised Spencer and got up and moved to sit in his lap. "I do know the real you. You are a sweet, generous, very smart man. Yes, you've had a hard time in your past, but I want to be here to make sure your future is wonderful. Again, I'm not asking you to commit to marriage and kids today, but are you willing to THINK about that as a future with us together?"
His eyes were damp and he didn't feel like he could speak so he simply nodded. She smiled and lightly kissed him. "There is a reason I brought everything up last night, it is because I was hoping that tonight you would come over and stay with me. I wanted to see if you thought we had the same future as I did." She went on, "I would make you a home cooked meal. You stay at a lot of hotels and always have a go bag ready, so I didn't think another night somewhere would be difficult. Would you want to stay?" she bit her lip waiting for his answer and realized she was rambling nervously.
He nodded again and kissed her; he didn't care if anyone was watching. The bar area was mostly empty except one man watching a NASCAR race on the screen at the bar. Neither Spencer nor Chelsea noticed Bob just outside the bar smiling at them.
They walked out to their cars and Chelsea asked him to be at her house around 5:30. She needed to stop at the store and get some supplies for the night's dinner. They both had brought umbrellas, but Spencer used his to cover them both in the parking lot. Just before she climbed in her car, she kissed him on the cheek and asked him to pick up some condoms.