As Dan called the police, Harry grabbed a pen from the counter, and rushed back outside. McGonagall was still lying on the ground stunned, so Harry pulled up her sleeve. Quickly, before she could even begin to protest, Harry etched a rune of binding linked to a rune of magic.
By the time McGonagall had recovered what passed for her wits, it was too late. While not permanent, the effects would end when the runes wore off the skin, McGonagall's magic was currently bound. Hermione asked what he had done, and when he told her both she and Emma shared matching grins.
"Mr. Potter, you need to return to Hogwarts for your own safety. Release me at once!" McGonagall tried to sound stern, but with her eyes still crossed it ruined the impression.
"As I already told you professor, I have no interest in being kidnapped." Harry said firmly.
McGonagall muttered something unprintable under her breath before saying "As your Deputy Headmistress, your safety is my responsibility young man. As such it is within my rights to return you to school."
"By any means necessary?" Emma asked sweetly.
"Yes, if that's what it takes to keep him safe!" McGonagall exclaimed.
Emma and Hermione exchanged dark glances, then Hermione asked "Isn't that the same rational Grindewald used in WWII professor?"
"What?" McGonagall said in outrage. "How dare you compare me to that butcher!"
Dan, who had returned to the front yard, asked "This Grindewald guy was Himmler right?"
Hermione nodded quickly "And he was the one who decided that wizard kind had to rule the world by any means necessary for their own protection."
Both parents frowned at this and turned back to a speechless McGonagall.
"Sounds very similar to the drivel you were just spouting professor." Emma said contemptuously.
Five minutes later the police turned up, asked for a statement, and then arrested Minerva McGonagall on charges of trespassing and attempted kidnapping.
HP**********************HP*************************HP
The rest of the Christmas break passed slowly, simply because both Dan and Emma were desperate to find a way for the children not to go back to Hogwarts.
The arguments lasted well into the night, going from the practical, to the moral, and even the financial reasons to stay or leave.
Finally, the two finally agreed not to return to Hogwarts for a second year on two conditions.
One, they had to find a viable alternative to Hogwarts. Two, they had to help Lisa move to that new school as well.
Unfortunately, the Grangers were unable to convince the children to end their participation in the school year that had already started. The children had assured the Grangers that the only teacher left that might try to do anything to them was Dumbledore, and he was rarely around.
While they didn't like it, the Grangers respected the children's decision. Of course, that didn't stop the Grangers from enlisting the help of Harry's aunt to try and find a better school for the children. They were willing to take almost any avenue open to them.
In the mean time, McGonagall was not having a nice time. Without magic, she was stuck as a muggle for at least a few weeks. That meant no animagus transformations, no aparation, and no way to contact Dumbledore. It also meant that as a pure blood witch, she had no records in the muggle world. Not a single reference.
Sufficed to say, a sixty year old woman with no records at all trying to kidnap an eleven year old boy and also claiming to be a teacher at a Scottish school set off alarms. McGonagall was subjected to a battery of tests, and was officially classified as mentally ill days after being arrested.
The reason for this was simple. McGonagall was a witch educated at Hogwarts, and she had never taken Arithmacy. She was barely able to do multiplication, let alone the complicated algebra and geometry problems she was tested on.
There is after all, a reason the Goblins are the only bank in the wizarding world. None of the wizards knew enough maths to even attempt it! Added to that, the very concept of math used for non magical purposes was alien to the wizards. They understood the idea that if they spent a Galleon, then they won't have it any more. They understood the idea of change for different forms of money, but for complex financial algorithms? That might as well be hidden better than Goblin forging techniques as far as most wizards were concerned.
Because of this, While McGonagall was able to pass many of the reading tests, (poorly due to the lack of language classes, but she passed) she was unable to do a single math problem on the tests.
This quickly put her in the mentally ill category, making her unfit to stand trial. So as a result, Hogwarts' deputy headmistress was sent to a mental hospital to be taught enough that she could stand trial for her crimes.
Sufficed to say, Minerva McGonagall was not having a good week. The worst part was they had taken her wand. So even when she got her magic back, she would have to find a way to aparate out of the mental hospital where there were no cameras. Otherwise, she could be fined for breaking the statute of secrecy. No, it was not a good week to be Minerva McGonagall.
HP****************************HP***************************HP
On the train ride back to Hogwarts, Harry and Hermione began filling in Lisa on what had happened during the break. Lisa was upset that McGonagall, a witch she respected, would resort to kidnapping (even if she didn't see it that way), but she was furious at the idea of leaving Hogwarts.
"No! I've spent my life waiting for this chance; I'm not giving it up because of a few bad teachers!" Lisa said angrily.
"A few? A few?" Hermione said heatedly. "There is Snape the abuser, McGonagall the Kidnapper, Dumbledore the Manipulator, Binns the Boring, Quirril the Incompetent and others we haven't even met yet!"
Lisa still held her mouth in a stubborn line as Hermione continued.
"Of the eight teachers we've met five of them have been bad, and the other three are only passable!"
Lisa looked ready to jump in at this point but Harry beat her to it.
"Lisa, so far the only good teachers we've are Flitwick, who I admit is pretty good, Sprout, who only really knows about magical plants, and can't even give gardening tips for nonmagicals, (Harry knew this because he had asked, his aunt had a garden that he helped take care of) and Sinistra, Who wouldn't know a real telescope or space image if it frenum suus in ass!" As he said this, Harry felt the Ahnleh grow warm against his breast. Unknown to him, his wand also vibrated and grew warm as well.
"Harry language!" Hermione said quickly and jumped "Ouch" she said, just as Lisa did the same thing, only more dramatically.
"Ahh!" Lisa said, jumping up and grabbing her backside. Harry and Hermione stared at Lisa for a long second, and she quickly dropped her hand back to an unassuming position, blushing.
"Something bit me." She said weakly.
"Me too" Hermione said quickly. Both turned to look at Harry suspiciously.
"What? I just said frenum suus in ass." Harry said exasperatedly.
Unfortunately, both girls jumped again when Harry said it, and Lisa squealed.
Harry's mouth dropped open. "There is no way that my words did that." He said softly in disbelief.
Both girls promptly glared at him and made sure he realized that his words had done it, and if he valued his life he wouldn't say that particular phrase in their presence ever again.
Nodding meekly, Harry agreed, but when the girls had gone back to arguing, Harry grinned. This could have all kinds of applications.
HP***********************************************HP
When they arrived back to Hogwarts, the three of them walked back to the Ravenclaw tower. When they entered, Harry quickly separated from the girls and found his way back outside.
From there he rushed to the welcome back feast. The girls were coming later, and Harry didn't want them to know about this.
He quickly made his way over to the Gryffindor table and sat next to the Weasley twins. Before they could make a sound he whispered
"If you want to see something interesting, say 'frenum suus in ass' in your common room when there are a lot of girls in the area, I think you will see the pranking potential."
Without waiting for a reply, Harry got up and went over to the Ravenclaw table.
While he didn't want to get burned by his two friends, Harry thought that the spell he had inadvertently created would be good pranking material for the twins, and would give him a favor if he ever asked for it. Plus, the reactions would be priceless if the twins ever used it on a large scale.
For that matter, if the Weasley twins experimented with the spell, then Harry could get whatever data they came up with for no cost and with no risk, something he couldn't say for himself. It was one thing if notorious pranksters found a way of pranking girls, it was quite another for a first year Ravenclaw to get a reputation of being a pervert.
Despite that, Harry thought the risk was worth it. If the twins used it, then it would provide entertainment, and also a way to possibly produce new spells quickly.
After all, he had simply said a phrase in Latin, he had not even intended anything, and magic had occurred. This meant that just spewing out random streams of Latin was probably not a good idea. Then again, shouting out random words in any language was generally a bad idea, but Latin was a tad more unpredictable in the results.
It had also not escaped Harry's notice that the spell had been performed wandlessly, and that alone was interesting.
Most wandless magic was simple levitation like the Jedi used in Star Wars, but it wasn't much use for anything else.
The spell he had used however had been completely wandless, and that opened up all sorts of possibilities.
HP****************************HP***************************HP
The next day, Harry was called into Dumbledore's office after breakfast. Remembering what he had learned about the mental arts in the goblin Library, Harry resolved to avoid eye contact with Dumbledore on principle.
As Harry raised his hand to knock, Dumbledore said "Come in Harry"
Sighing (the whole fake X-ray vision thing got old very fast) Harry entered Dumbledore's office.
"Ah. Mr. Potter, thank you for coming." Dumbledore said.
Harry nodded, and sat down.
"How are you doing Mr. Potter?" Dumbledore asked kindly.
Harry sighed again before saying "I'm fine sir, other than being called into your office apparently for the sole reason of exchanging pleasantries with my headmaster."
Frowning slightly Dumbledore asked "Yes, well, I sent a number of people out searching for you over the holidays, and I'm afraid that Minerva did not return. You wouldn't know anything about that would you my boy?"
Harry was careful to avoid Dumbledore's eyes as he said "Sorry professor, we didn't see anyone from the magical world, but if she's as ignorant of muggle culture as most wizards then it wouldn't surprise me if she got arrested and is currently in prison."
Dumbledore frowned, unsettled by Harry's blasé attitude.
Harry then asked "Was there a reason you sent search parties out for me in particular Headmaster?"
Dumbledore with a twinkle in his eye said "Yes Mr. Potter, we didn't know where you were."
Harry snorted. "I believe I already told you that what I do on my vacations is none of your business."
"I see, well thank you Mr. Potter." Dumbledore said.
Harry nodded and got up. As he walked to the door he turned back and said "If McGonagall has not returned to Hogwarts, then she is either in muggle prison, or in hiding. I wonder what she could be hiding from?"
With that Harry left Dumbledore's office, leaving a troubled Headmaster behind.
HP**************************HP***********************HP
Dumbledore was concerned. Of all the people he had searching for Harry Potter, only Minerva had not reported in. He had tried asking the boy, but he was not only unconcerned, but he was also exceedingly unhelpful. Dumbledore had been unable to read the boys mind, he kept staring at the books behind him like a true Ravenclaw, and neither of his suggestions were in any way serious.
Minerva wouldn't leave Hogwarts, not without telling him, and the idea that muggles could defeat and imprison a witch who had a wand and was an animagus was absurd.
Unfortunately, Dumbledore didn't have too many options. He couldn't call the aurors because then he would have to explain what she had been doing when she disappeared, not something he relished doing.
On the other hand, his deputy was missing, and if he didn't call the aurors then the board of governors would have his head on the proverbial platter faster than he could say his full name.
The only options he had left were to find her himself, which was not looking promising, or calling the aurors and lying to them about what she had been doing. This presented a whole host of problems, from the lack of evidence supporting his story, to the potential blackmail opportunities someone would have if they figured it out.
Regrettably, this was looking more and more like his most viable option.
Dumbledore frowned. Even if he called the aurors he would still have to teach the transfiguration classes for at least the first week of the new term, something he was not looking forward to.
While he liked children, and he even liked teaching, he found that teaching usually conflicted with his duties as Head of the Wizengamot. This meant that unless he could find a temporary replacement for the post of transfiguration professor he would be dooming the wizarding legislature and court to a week of total inactivity.
Sometimes Dumbledore regretted having taken so many powerful positions following his defeat of Grindewald.
HP*************************HP********************HP
In another part of the world, a certain Doctor Jackson hit his head on his desk. He had trouble deciphering a portion of Goa'uld hieroglyphics. He had sent a portion of the hieroglyphics to a British professor who went by the pen name Howard Carter (Daniel had chuckled when he understood the reference) and the man had gotten back to him.
Unfortunately, he was requesting more information, and Daniel wasn't sure he could get it to him. Still, he would ask. If he had to he would give it to him in person, Howard Carter was one of the best in his field.
(A/N)
So I have decided to keep writing on my longer schedule, thank you to those who reviewed last chapter. This chapter was short, but important. Dumbledore in this story is not evil, just a dark gray 'For the Greater Good' type of leader.
McGonagall will show up again, just not for a bit longer.
Oh, I have to admit, I made a mistake with the entering Diagon Alley bit, apparently it is NOT a pentagram, and I simply forgot that (in my defense, it was a minor bit just to show Harry's observation skills and I haven't read the first book in a long time).
One thing I couldn't believe about Hogwarts was that they only taught magic. No Math, no English, (or Latin which they should teach considering their magic is based off of Latin incantations) and only the bare bones of British Magical history. Even that failed miserably because Binns put everyone to sleep!
Just remember that in second year Goyle couldn't even read! And there was no way for him to learn because neither his parents nor friends were going to devote time to teaching him!
While most children were not quite that bad, (most were not pureblood either which explains a lot) the fact remains that few if any students will learn anything about grammar or math at Hogwarts.
You know, we always hear Snape complaining about the poor quality of the essays he gets, well being a half-blood he probably got at least some muggle education, so he knows how to write and essay, most of the wizards never had to write a thing before coming to Hogwarts, and there are no classes teaching them how! No wonder the essays are so bad, they've never been taught to write them!
The same is true of the math's, the only vaguely math like class in Hogwarts in Arithmacy, and I'm sorry, knowing that 7 is the most powerful magical number and works well with 3 is not going to help in banking, finance, or Algebra.
Two questions for the readers.
One has anyone figured out what the Ahnleh is yet?
Two, is the whole magical guardian thing Cannon or Fannon? Because I've seen it used in many stories, but I don't recall it appearing in cannon.
For those who have had the courage to read this exceedingly long Authors Note, I have created a Forum on my profile, if you have any burning questions post them there and I'll try and answer them.