Disclaimer: I'm running out of creative ways to put it. I own this series no more than I own Harrison Ford, Mt. Rushmore, Lipton Tea Company, a good bottle of pantene shampoo, a million bucks, a TRILLION bucks, blond hair, fluency in Welsh, China... Must I go on?
THANK YOU!! THANK YOU!! (yodels atop a Swiss mountaintop) I give you each a metaphorical cupcake.
Lorrin: Hmmm... well, then she'd have to live with regret forever. Literally, so...I dunno. I've got a different ending in mind, one that involves... eh, you'll find out. Thanks for reviewing! You're 744! If i were a piccadilly, you'd receive a free meal right now.
Djtlas: Thanks. Wait no more! Glad you like my spare time, 1oclock in the morning, near delierious rambling.
Minimeyer: Loved the pm... I think the scrolly thing on my mouse is broken. Eh, it was time for a new one anyway. Haha, JK! :D Yes, that sounds like an excellent hiding spot. ORRRRRR, behind my back. Move along emmett, nothing to see here! :D (ching). Thanks my friend.
XxxElianexXx: Tense suspense...oooo that ryhmed. Well, thanks for the w-o-w. THANKS as always. That really is quite gross of Edward. Kicking an amputee when he's, well, amputated. Haha. :P
Thrushflightedward'sstalker: haha. I forgot about that. I did get a little disappointed. First ember and all. If someone flamed me, I might attack. Nah, jk, it didn't really bother me much. All's forgiven! Yay. Made up for by your amore! Thanks. (breathes deeply) no name changes this time. But hey, at least I figured them all out. Does that count for anything??
Euphoriafalls: Chastity...right. Did I mention Phillip is sortof a sexaholic. It's sad really. He's going to meetings and everything though. :D Oooo...mozart...must say I never liked his music much. Beethoven's my man, but not in the sexual (aka. Philliplike) way, because he's old with a beard and ...ah im just aramblin. Congrats to Hannah! And thanks. Phillip thanks you excessively for Chastity. (I smell baby llamas) What do you call those anyway? I mean, horses are foals. Cows are calves. Ducks are ducklings. Llamaettes??
Bronzehairedfreak1901: haha. Thanks!
Emberwillow14: I know. When my muse gets her slimy/control/megalomaniacal hands on me, it's just chaos sometimes. At least there's always a direction, even if I think it's stupid, I must press onward! She commands it. And actually, it's a he: Chad Michael Murray to be exact. Whoo hoo (WaMu) :D You go, embow... rip apart those fictional characters. USE THE CHAIR! And thank you oddles
Thegirlfromamestris: Yes, I'm sure you didn't know, but Bella is quite talented in matters of banishment. It's kind of crazy actually. HAHA! Twigs! (cue music). Emmett the snowman! Was a jolly happy soul! Ah...tears of joy...good times. Good times. Thank you. Thank you very much.
Dafuturemrssurie: Liked the random capitalization on the 'n'. It made me giggle. Edward, my friend, is the very definition of yummy! Look it up. Mobs of angry fangirls made Merriam Webster change it. And thanks.
SavannahX: Why thank you ever so much for the love. (sigh) Ah, it's good to be loved. Haha. Anyway, no homicides for savannah. Unless you're in the mood to kill some of the bad people: world dictators, animal abusers... osama, terrorists and the like. My faeries apparently make everyone laugh. Clearly, no one has studied Irish mythology/O.R. Melling books (better than HP and SOMETIMES twilight, I tell ya!) O, and I'd definitely be at the TA meeting. Id be the one clutching to the book in withdrawal spasms. It'd be sad. Really, really, lifescarring sad. But thank you!!
Dlmadlang: Yep. This story is like a perpetual cycle of endings. It's odd to write, actually. But anyway. Dreading? Hmmm... Are you psychic? Alice maybe? Jk...it won't be too terribly bad. I can't promise perfection though. YAY!! OMG IVE HIT THE ADJECTIVE JACKPOT!! THANKS!! Loved every single one. Trophies all shiny and polished on my shelf. OOOO...don't bow at MY feet, anyway. They smell. :P thanks!
Allyq1990: I'm glad you see it as a hard choice. Other people are just like ditch it! That's a long time to live with a secret like THAT, forever is. Cliche? Darn. Ending to make up for it though I hope.
Pollilolli: Ouch? Severe? As in, lifethreatening? I might have to beat you with sticks. Defend my dignity and whatnot. I WATCH JACKIE CHAN MOVIES. Just warning you. Thanks...I think?
E: haha. Did you read the other chapters? Thanks!
Yan Niao: YAY! Someone likes it. Whoa nelly. My brain is lawfully married to Kerssica (don't ask), but erm, you might be scared...and scarred...for a long long time. But if that's what you REALLY want, then here! Take it! It's heavy, wrinkly, ugly, and pink (LEAST favorite color). Have fun! I'm going to go be dumb now... without my brain and all. LAAAAAAAAAA (thanks) LAALALALA.
Thefuturemrsedwardcullen: HAHA! I have four now. Lily/YOUKNOWWHO/Steph/betaee...HAHAHAHAHA. Don't be sad! No, I will make like glad tuperwear and save you from sadness! Dun dun da dun! Haha. Here. I give you peach (wtf) icecream and a chiropractor named Chuck. Thanks for everything.
LaurenBTwilightFan: You need to put that on a leash...haha. New phrase, referring to your excitement. I rather like it and jump at any chance to use it. So, yeah. Nice quotes. First one was my favorite, tho. Thanks and cya.
Lollieroxmysox: ah!! Someone's a smart cookie. Way to erm... foresee a conversation I had planned between Eddie and Carlisle. There is, however, better medicine these days. Just saying. Thanks for the review.
Thats my Pen name.: Puppy dog face was persuasive! However, I've had the ending planned out since the dawn of time. Jk... the noon of time's more like it. Oh, no. You ran away? WHERED YOU GO? I MISS YOU SO! SEEMS LIKE ITS BEEN FOREVER.. sorry, likely to burst out in random song. Youve been warned. Thanks.
Ian3737: Aw (blushes like...like...there is no earthly comparison) Hmmm...bout that last bit. Depends on how it's written I think, but who's to say that's my plan. I think you'll be the perfect amount of happy, sad, and reflective at the end. :P Thanks oodles for all the wonderful reviews! You made my day!
Melody Cullen: I wish my English professor would tell me things like that. "Amazing as usual" and all. Im not the best at essays unfortunately. No fun in those. Yuck! I just thought Jake deserved a girl for once. Nice web of speculation. It does seem like ive written myself into a corner i suppose, from your side of the fence. Thrilled you love that line. It's one of my faves. Something about that "lowered lashes" part makes me swoon.
Ellerin Kia: Are you sure you're at the right temple? I didn't see you. There's two, you see, one to me, Lily Turtle, and another to Ily Turtle...See the difference? Ah well, it's the WONDERFUL SPLENDERIFIC thought that counts. Sorry about leaving you dangling over cliffs. I dod that a lot. Thanks.
Mari alice: Yes, that's true. It could present a problem. And whether or not they'll get their nite together depends upon whether or not you favorited me... not to impose, but... well, I can't tell. It's a suprise! And thanks.
SS: True... Just another part of the seemingly unsolvable dilemma. Pluto's not a planet... isn't that sad. I bet Pluto feels all rejected and left out now. Let's all send a card to Pluto!! Allright, well I am anyways. WHOS WITH ME? ...anyone?...someone? ...fine! here I go with the babbling again. Sorry. Thanks.
Lovablelozer: :( You caught me. But you're only the second! It's a nice phrase. (sniffle) Quite a dilemma, it seems like! And thanks.
SillyElla: Really? I've been lied to! Oh, the treachery! Haha, but moving on, yes, zombies are back. The survival guide says you should barricade yourself in a Wal-Mart. I'd get on that if I were you. Nice guess, though. And thanks, love!
Albnal33: I have a bad habit of that, plot cramming. Too many ideas. So little time. So little patience. NO, dont' be sorry at all. I adore it when people leave thoughtful reviews! Adore! I adore you! Yay, did I raise your selfesteem a smidge? You sure did mine! Haha. Of course, if Edward doesn't drink it, which means he wouldn't know about it, Bella would live forever with guilt and that feeling of "what if", and it would eventually eat away at her soul. Just looking at the other side of the coin. THANKS!
XXxbrokenxXx: I read all reviewers opinions. Thanks for yours! Cyalatabye!
Nobodyparticular: Phew...no pressure or anything. Haha. jk. I hope you think that at the end. Living forever does sound nice, but not with guilt. THANKS, as always! :D
Mandja: Thaks for the love! Yippee! Chat you later...hopefully.
Moonifrui: Me too, almost. It's tempting to keep it going forever and ever. But alas... it must end sometime. THANKS!
Smile for Life: You and everyone else I think. Even me, sometimes. K, and thnx.
FantasyLove: Thank you very much, both for the liking and the opinions. Considered and appreciated!
Deepcutfighter: OH, haven't seen you in a while! Glad you're back. It seems to be tragic either way. Either immediate tradgedy, or eventual tradgedy, so... what's going to happen next?! (legasp). Thnx.
MeyaRose: Meh, there's a first time for everything. Haha...jk. I'm sure you're face is perfectly normal. And thank you for faithfully reviewing.
Ol2bob: Come to think of it, I love Edward. Any model. Do you REALLY feel that way? But, thank you!! So much!! Whoo hoo (wamu). Im going to go eat lasagna now.
Dazzled26: This chapter should explain that quirk. Thanks! Come again...
Hibiscusqt: I'm like a bungee chord with my suspense. Haha...ahhhh, no one thinks it's funny...erm, PUNNY! Haha. thanks for the awesome, as always, reviews. You are the cooliest!
Iminlovewithjasper: Anytime.
Chapter 32
I walked with Edward down the tiled hallway as if in a dream. Flashes of fluorescent light from the rectangular panels on the ceiling were the only threads keeping me tied to the physical world.
Hazily, as if from a distance, doctors' and nurses' words hummed like swarms of bumblebees. They brushed past me occasionally at a brisk walk, and my shoulder would jump backward slightly. I'd hear a 'sorry, miss', the slight 'shushing' of scrubs against my cotton shirt, but I didn't look up. I was too caught up in thoughts, this sticky web of thoughts that the vial in my pocket had created.
I wished then that the women had never given it to me, or that I hadn't caught it. I wished that I would've let it smash and shatter on the cold hospital floor into a million pieces and watched the liquid flow out into a useless ruby puddle, easily wiped up and thrown away.
Even Edward's presence, which I was normally so attune to, that followed me everywhere like a steady drumbeat, was dull by my side, like music heard playing from a thickly insulated room, his cold grip on my arm a mere breeze.
And Jacob. He'd imprinted on an acquaintance of mine. Truthfully, I didn't know how to feel about that. I was happy for him, yes, but it felt like yet another wedge had been driven between us. Distance that we wanted was all right. It could be crossed whenever we didn't desire it anymore...but this distance was permanent, set in heart-engraved stone. I could never cross it myself, and even though I didn't really want to, the fact that the option had been taken away was stinging.
Right now, what Edward and I would do stirred up countless feelings, too. I was nervous, more nervous than I'd ever been. The times before, when I'd practically begged him for it- that was different because I was prepared. I knew what I wanted and I was going for it, but now was different. It was unexpected and it came upon me so suddenly that I hadn't really let it sink it till now.
My simple golden wedding band was suddenly a frightening thing. What if he wasn't pleased with me? I really didn't have a clue what to do anyway. Or, what if I did something wrong? My face flushed scarlet just imagining the mortification that would become of that.
The next moment, I was promptly jerked out of my own head by a different cold hand.
"Hey!" Alice exclaimed, "I've been trying to talk to you for minutes! Earth to Bella!"
"Sorry," I mumbled.
"I need to talk to you," she said.
"Alice, don't bother her with it..." my husband started.
"Zip it, Edward," she replied, turning back to me. "Something weird happened in my visions today," she continued, "when you were in that room."
"Jacob was there," I explained, even as the vial scorched me. I was sure it would leave a mark.
"Yes," she said thoughtfully, "I saw that. It was black like usual, but then he left, and...I don't know. You disappeared, but it wasn't like normal."
I cocked my head to the side, feigning innocence.
"You're future sort of...fogged over, like frost on a window pane or something. I saw shapes and shadows, but that was it. Did anything happen?" she asked skeptically.
I shook my head. "I told you that you needed to get that clairvoyance thing checked out," I said with a laugh.
Edward grabbed my arm and started to pull me away again. "You see," he said angrily.
Alice looked hesitant, but I couldn't calm her fears, even falsely, for Edward had dragged me out to be swept up again by the chattering current of hospital personnel.
"She's making a mountain out of a mole hill," Edward said quietly.
I laughed. "That's Alice for you." My skin was singed again. It was a mountain, a very tall mountain. Everest would have been envious.
Why couldn't Alice see them, I wondered. But, if they really were something like the Fates, they had control over the future. That would mean that they had control over Alice's gift. I was once again taken aback by how much resided in this world that I didn't know about.
We got into the elevator, and Edward casually pushed the button for the ground level. Down, even closer...something caught in my throat.
Then, catching me completely off guard, Edward laughed. "Remind me, darling, to never send you to a foreign country without me there to watch. Stealing cars, becoming completely drunk, run-ins with crazy psychics, and putting someone in prison. Is that all you did?"
I shot him a sly side-glance. "What happens in Mexico stays in Mexico."
The doors opened with a whoosh of air and we exited the small space. Edward grabbed my hand and walked faster than normal. I was struggling to keep up. We passed the waiting rooms, with their silent people reading tabloids in lounging chairs, or catching up on the latest news. It occurred to me then, that this was not Forks hospital. Then we walked out the automatic doors, into the dusk. Somehow, I'd slept the day away.
He swiftly strode across the parking lot, me in tow. I glanced up at the sign once: Port AngelesMemorialHospital. Ah, so that was where we were. I supposed that there weren't enough people to man the one in Forks, what with all of them still on "vacation" and all.
Once I was in the Volvo, and Edward was turning the key to start the ignition, I accidentally blurted out "I can't believe I'm married to you now." My hand reached up and clamped itself over my traitorous mouth.
He turned and looked at me with carefully controlled panic. "It hasn't been much so far, but...do you like it?"
"That's a silly question."
He shrugged. "Do you? I mean, I know you didn't want this."
"I wanted it," I assured him.
"All the same, what's your answer?"
"Well...married life certainly hasn't been what I expected so far, what with war and the plane rides and the car theft, but...yeah. Who am I kidding? I love it, Edward. I love you! There's..." I struggled with how to explain it without sounding cliché. "It, this is going to sound stupid, but it feels right, like I belong here, like this ring," I held up my hand with the wedding band on it, "is just another part of my finger. That sounds dumb." I sighed.
Edward shook his head. "Not dumb at all actually. You could be a poet, Bella." He smiled crookedly.
"What about you?" I asked. "Do you like being married to me?"
"That's a silly question."
I smiled. "Care to elaborate?"
"Every day I spend with you is the best day of my life. I hate leaving you, even if it's only to walk into another room." My mouth fell open. "I thought I'd be lonely for forever, eternity, but then you came along, and it was like finding more than a soul mate. Bella, it was like I found my soul."
He took his eyes off the road to peer at me so intensely, I felt frozen, suspended in the depths of them. For once, I didn't complain about it.
"You own me Bella, all of me, from my head to my toes, it's all yours. Not much of a present, I know."
I opened my mouth to protest, but he continued.
"Let me finish, please. I have so much love for you, sometimes I feel like I will explode from it all. I love the way you talk, the expressions you make, your reactions, how clumsy you are only because it means I have you in my arms more. I love the way you sing to yourself when you think nobody's listening, your stories, listening to your opinions, the way you describe things, your determination, everything. Every single minuscule little detail."
My mouth was ajar. He smiled and reached up one long white finger to gently close it. "Now you can talk," he said.
I tried to, but the words got stuck on their way out of my vocal chords.
"Dazzled again?" he asked.
I nodded mutely. My mouth began to move. He tilted his head the side and gazed at me curiously.
"Oh," I finally said.
His eyes caught fire. "Oh... I can work with that," he whispered, leaning forward.
I gulped, but let him kiss me senseless for a few seconds, before I pulled away.
"Watch the road," I said, and then added, "dear."
He chuckled. "Whatever you say, honey."
A few miles more, after my breathing had calmed down and my heart stopped racing for the most part, I spoke again. "So...when you say traditional, do we have to have pet names for each other?"
Edward laughed outright. "What'd you have in mind?"
"Eddieweddy," I joked.
"Only if I get to call you Bellacakes."
"Stud muffin?"
"Hmm...Doll face." His tone was amusingly thoughtful.
"Snookums?"
"If that's what you want, pumpkin."
I made a face. "I think I'll call you Sparkles."
He cringed too. "I think I'll close my eyes and pretend like you call me 'lion' whenever you do... sunshine," he threw in.
"Do you want me to call you lion?" I asked, between a hopeless fit of giggles.
Edward looked exasperated. "Well...no. It was just a...suggestion. Much better than Sparkles." He huffed.
"Aw, I was just joking," I told him. "...lion." That set the laughter off again. "The lion," I said in a deep voice.
"I'll show you lion," he growled threateningly. Before my awareness could catch up, Edward had unbuckled my seatbelt, lifted me up, and had me pinned in the back seat.
I stared blankly into his penetrating gaze. "The car!" I exclaimed.
"We've stopped," he said, "and you, sunshine, look ravishing."
Next, his hands grabbed mine and pinned them up above my head. I could only gasp helplessly. Then, I couldn't see his face anymore. His lips were trailing a lazy pattern from my ear to the point where my shoulder and neck connected. "Ed. Ward," I groaned out breathlessly.
"That's not my name."
Casually, his hand reached up under the hem of my shirt. When his cold flesh touched my burning skin, I shivered. His fingers splayed out over my abdomen, and I could feel him smile against my collarbone as he continued to dole out his lingering kisses one by torturous one.
I wanted to touch him, so I tried to move my hands to do so. Run my fingers through his hair, feel the swell and ebb of his shoulder muscles, anything, but I still found my wrists to be locked in the cold vice of his hands.
"What's my name again?" he whispered into my ear, sliding his lips over the sensitive skin there with every syllable.
"Edward," I groaned, struggling against his grip.
"Who?"
I sighed. "Lion," I muttered.
"Sorry," he said, "Didn't catch that."
Yes, I'm sure, with his super vampire hearing, that he heard it perfectly well. Even so, I wanted control of my appendages. "Lion," I shouted.
His fingers released, and my hands immediately went to his back. He moved his body down to rest his head on my chest, listening to my heart sputter erratically.
I ran my hands over every place I could reach, down the slightly indented path of his spine, across his broad shoulders, sliding them through his hair. I couldn't get enough.
"Why'd you stop?" I complained.
He lifted his head to look at me like I was incompetent. "You didn't honestly think that I'd take you in this car, did you?"
Take me... He'd never worded it quite like that. My heart skipped beats like a broken record.
"Um...no." I felt the blood rush to my cheeks.
"Silly Bella," he said, before lifting himself up off me and climbing out of the car. He held the door open for me. "Shall we?"
I exited the vehicle, letting Edward help me step out into the cold night air. Examining my surroundings, I was surprised to see that I recognized them. We were standing before the dark silhouette of Edward's house.
"Here?" I asked, not that I minded, but it seemed like a risky place to get walked in on.
But Edward shook his head no. "Just one stop...for tradition's sake."
I furrowed my eyebrows. He grabbed my hand and led me inside, not bothering to flip on the light switch. Clearly, nobody was home. We walked up the steps and he led me into his room. Here, however, he did turn on the lights. His window, broken just yesterday, was now repaired. There wasn't even a crack as evidence of the violence.
"Jasper's pretty good with stuff like that," he said, noticing where my stare was directed. "Now, Bella, would you do me a favor?"
I looked at his smirking face and became suspicious. "Yes..."
"Put your wedding dress back on."
"Why?" I asked.
"So that we can do our wedding night the correct way."
I narrowed my eyes, but began walking towards his bathroom. Everything was as I left it, only someone, probably Alice, had hung up my dress on the shower curtain. I threw my clothes in the corner, pulled it down, and stepped inside, pulling the smooth fabric up my body till I could stick my arms through the sleeves. I managed to get the zipper about halfway up. Edward would have to do the rest.
Then, with horror, I remembered something: the vial. I scrambled to reach it in my jeans pocket. Once I did, I didn't know what to do with it. I saw the sink. I could pour the liquid down it with no one the wiser. Pour out Edward's dream... Somehow, I just couldn't. There was a small floral-patterned knapsack on the floor. Yellow paper was folded neatly on top of it. 'Bella' it said. I read it quickly. It was from Alice. She wished me luck and said how happy she was for me. 'I hope this helps' was the last line. I unzipped the zipper and peeped in. Inside, was lingerie of every color and underwear of every type, lacy, sheer, polka-dotted, and striped. I didn't have a choice. I'd have to take the bag, either that, or leave it here and take the chance that it might be discovered.
I shoved the vial deep into the bottom of the knapsack, under layers and layers of lacy mesh, zipped it back up, threw it over my shoulder and walked out the door.
Outside, Edward was standing in his tux, looking exactly the same way he did on our wedding day.
"Here, let me help you with that," he said, walking around to the back of my dress. His nimble fingers had it zipped the rest of the way in a second.
"What's in the bag?" he asked.
I blushed again. "Alice said I should take it."
He shrugged, slung the bag over his own shoulder, my anxious eyes watching it carefully, and then offered me the crook of his arm. I took it with a flourish, and we began descending the stairs.
As we came down them, Edward hummed the wedding march. I couldn't help but smile. He opened the front door, and, much to my surprise, the rest of my new family were making a path for us, out to a shiny blue car I'd never seen before.
As soon as they noticed us, they grabbed birdseed from little pouches and threw it at us. Alice looked like she was having way more fun than the occasion called for.
I laughed. "You really are big on tradition, aren't you?" I asked him.
He only smiled and walked on, opening the passenger's side door for me. I got in and waved at everyone, slightly embarrassed. I heard Emmett call out. "Nice bag, Edward!"
But he was already in the car, driving to who-knew-where. He tossed the bag in the back.
"I hope this is a rental."
"Not a chance."
I took in the soft leather seats, the sleek GPS navigational screen, and the futuristic looking radio, lit up around the edges by a silver-gray light.
"Why did you decide you needed a new one?"
"I didn't," he said slyly. "I decided that you needed a new one."
No. He did not buy me a new car. Who knew how much this thing cost?
"I'm putting it on E-bay the moment we get back," I warned him.
"You'll do no such thing." He turned his puppy dog face to me. "Please, Bella. Just accept it and be happy."
I slumped down in the seat, and grumbled, "I'll accept it, but I won't be happy."
"You," he told me, "are the only person in the entire world who would be upset about owning a brand new Camaro Z28."
"Yes," I agreed, "I am."
A/N: Yay. Here's Bella's car. I thought it looked like her for some reason. Nothing too fancy: /forums/images/camaro.jpg. R&R please