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Chapter 9:
Dreams
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"I have dreamt of a place for you and I
No one knows who we are there
All I want is to give my life only to you
I've dreamt so long I cannot dream anymore
Let's run away, I'll take you there."
-Anywhere by Evanescence
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XXXX
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November
When she opened her eyes, they weren't greeted by the tiresome darkness she lived in.
It was dark, there was no denying it, yet...this abyss lacked its usual grief.
This darkness was different.
It was intense, like a flame burning at night time. This darkness was...soothing, smooth, and tentative.
It took her a moment to realize that it wasn't her surroundings she looked at, but him.
Uchiha Sasuke's eyes stared down at her own orbs of opal and calmly held them with inscrutable emotions. Something swam in those depths of onyx and crimson, something that put her in strange yet comforting ease.
Hinata could only gaze back as the chill of winter began to penetrate her ivory-colored skin and filter akin to a treacherous substance into her very marrow.
The lake, the rain, the heavy clouds of violet and dark navy blue took form from every direction, instantaneously unfolding with grace and infinite magnitude; yet she didn't witness the wondrous process. Her attention was riveted on the man before her.
It was odd, having him like this, not his hovering position paralleled to her own, his body suspended over hers by invisible threads, but him.
Sasuke was a mysterious individual in her mind, one that could not be puzzled, one whose armor was impenetrable.
Nothing ever indicated his tastes or his true dislikes. He was like a star, Hinata had once thought in those late afternoon spars with Naruto, times in Uchiha Sasuke was present, forever bound to the blond's side by the Hokage's orders.
Sasuke was seen and thought of as attainable but was, in truth, an unreachable cosmic element, like a star.
Later on, she realized her ignorant mistake.
Sasuke was no star; he was a whole galaxy of unfathomable mysteries.
He was a wandering spirit that didn't belong to the places he roamed. Not in Konoha, not out of it, not in another village. He was in the village, in his place of birth, a place he'd grown in and learned to defend from an early age. His clan had been one of the firsts to settle Konoha, his family had been massacred by its own blood for the Leaf, his brother had died for the sake of its peace.
Sasuke should have belonged, for those reasons and more. His team was here; they were all Konoha shinobi. He was rooted to the Hidden Village by its history, by its people.
And yet...he wasn't.
He didn't fit.
Not only was he physically unique, but his mind was also on another level. Dark looks and pale skin was dominant only within the Hyuuga; the rest of the honored clans of Konoha had nothing but light hair with light skin, like the Yamanaka. There existed the typical dark-haired clans, wearing skin the color of almonds, like the Nara.
There was no one like the Uchiha.
There was no one like Sasuke.
His character was unapproachable, his indifference cold, his eyes brimful with contempt.
She felt her stomach churn as those same eyes continued to observe her, and she thought, a bit breathlessly, that Uchiha-san was a paradox.
Now, there was no iciness in his gaze, no emotion familiar with disdain, though in her perspective, he remained in a world she couldn't cross into and in an imaginary reality she couldn't begin to grasp despite him being so close.
"...It'll r-rain," she stammered when she managed to blink away from that spell-bounding gaze.
He stared at her for an additional moment before stating, simply, "It will."
As if on cue, a clap of thunder boomed in the distance. A moment later, the first curtain of rain fell.
Her eyes slid shut in instinct as her face raised to catch the drops, feeling the biting cold caress of water embrace her.
The shallow lake she had first stumbled through began to flood underneath her weight at an alarming pace. Within a minute, she sank into the freezing liquid.
Before she had time to gasp, Sasuke had already taken hold of her arm and tugged her to the surface.
She coughed and the Uchiha dragged her away to the closest shore as she trembled.
Once on even ground, his hand left her, opting for falling lifelessly at his side, the chains circling his wrist jingling in mock cheerfulness.
Her hair, dampened, clung to her face, looking as dark as blue ink against her white pallor. Her lips became as red as mature cherries and her blood, in its natural attempt to keep her body warm, rushed to her cheeks, lit with the brightest red Sasuke had ever seen.
She opened her mouth to thank him but paused before any sound could escape.
Her brows knitted into a frown and Sasuke watched unhelpfully as the struggling Hyuuga tried to voice her thoughts. He noted that the shivers rattling her body weren't aiding her goal.
"Ne, Uchiha-san," she attempted. Her eyes traveled to his again and in them, Sasuke saw her confusion, her distress at not being able to put her doubts in order. "Last time, you said...you said I'd be safe here. Why?"
He regarded her. "Why?" he echoed, his breath white. Hinata nodded. "It's simple. The scum that's after you can't hope to reach or hurt you. Not here. In your circumstances, wouldn't you consider such a place safe?"
The tension in her shoulders eased. The relief at knowing no one could harm her in this world of ice was almost painful. "This place...where-"
"I've told you before," he reminded her.
"You have," she confirmed, but her confusion didn't falter. "You said, that this...was my mind. But what part of the mind is it? Everything is so...tangible. Real. My eyes are here," she touched her temple, "inside. I'm not blind, my face isn't marked..."
Sasuke listened, his tall frame no longer hovering above hers.
"It's not genjutsu, and if it was..." she trailed off. "If it was, I wouldn't be able to see an illusion." Her jaw hardened at the implying truth of her disability.
"Correct," he granted slowly. "Optic genjutsu would be useless against someone lacking sight," he stated softly, her downcast eyes not gone unnoticed. "But," he continued, and something in that exception made her glance at him apprehensively, "genjutsu affects a human's five senses. You still have four to work with."
Hinata gulped down the overwhelming feeling building in the walls of her throat. Even though she knew she was crippled, it stung, it hurt, to have to face the reality of such a handicap. A part of her, a silly, hopeful, and down-right stupid part, believed that her sight could be restored, and it scared her. Laying all of her hopes on an impossible option was frightening.
"It matters not if you can see me," Sasuke told her. "As long as I have a tactile connection to you," he paused, only to run the pad of his fingertip under one of her eyes, "I'll be able to cast any sort of genjutsu I wish to."
Hinata felt the skin beneath her right eye burn with his touch, as if an ember the shape of his digit had brushed past. His eyes followed the motion, descending down to her lips before settling on the dip of her chin.
"A-and yet, you haven't."
Sasuke's gaze remained glued to her quivering mouth. "Even without vision, I could hurt you." Slowly, he redirected his gaze to scrutinize her with narrowed eyes. "You would be safe from everyone but me."
"Yes," she whispered, mostly to herself. "Perhaps." But Sasuke wasn't the most pressing danger, despite his vile reputation. "However, this is no genjutsu of yours. I'd feel your chakra."
"With all of this pandemonium inside you?" he arched a brow. "I doubt it."
"If this...was truly an illusion, you wouldn't be trying to convince me that it was."
Sasuke hesitated. And swore mentally because she was right. She'd seen right through him.
Hinata continued. "So, how did you manage to get us...here? How could something like this be feasible... is hard to understand." Her frown became more pronounced. "It rains, and it's cold, worse than any winter I've witnessed. You said this was an escape, so you must know it well. Does that mean you..?" she trailed off, her face smoothing in realization. "You've been in a place like this before."
The way he easily knew what went on in this disconcerting place, his firm words, his unruffled demeanor was in complete opposition to her turbulent emotions of awe and incredulity. They were all signs that spoke of a composed, almost desensitized attitude granted by experience.
Sasuke scoffed and a rueful smile softened the corners of his mouth. Hinata could only stare; she'd never seen that quirk of lips before. The effect it had on his features was stunning, however sorrowful.
"More times than I care to count," he admitted.
"Oh," she breathed, the answer somewhat expected, but simultaneously surprising. She hadn't anticipated the confession to be given so easily.
"But," he added, "never with company." She received a pointed look.
Wide irises shone with astonishment. "No one else has ever...?"
He shook his head. "This isn't the first time I dive into someone's psyche, but it is the first in which I bring the owner along. You...your mindscape is," he searched for the word, "unusual. I've never seen -or felt- something as cold. And," he raised his wrists, presenting the cuffs around them, "these are new, too."
"Why are you in chains?" One of her hands rose to the metal, curious at the markings engraved in the iron.
Her hand went right through, as if Sasuke was a mere ghost.
She gasped. "I-I can't touch you," she exclaimed hushedly, her eyes wide. "But you, you did a while ago, and I...I felt you."
Sasuke closed his eyes, tilting his head to the side, overgrown bangs following suit. His posture was that of relaxation, of complete calm, something so alien to her in these few last months it was surprisingly pleasant to see it resting on someone else's face, especially if it was his.
In their time as acquiescence, only indifference and annoyance seemed to grace his features, never a hint of tranquility. It was...new, and it was nice.
Hinata waited for him to say something, anything to kill her unceasing inquiries, but the endless crying rain was her only answer, a song in her ears that could only be created by thousands, if not millions, of drops merging with one another.
"Questions," he spoke. "You want answers to clear the fog. Isn't that right?" he prompted her, a hidden meaning roaming in his offer.
Pale eyes searched his for a long moment. "Yes."
"Then I'll tell you."
XXX
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"We make our own reality," Sasuke said, looking at the droplets of rain accumulating below the ice cliff he and the Hyuuga were situated at. The lake had long since been abandoned for higher terrain. If sheets of ice and mountains of snow and glaciers could be labeled as such. "What we feel, what we see or touch, becomes a truth in our minds. Scents, flavors, sensations. All of them are perceived as experiences worth cataloging."
The Hyuuga listened attentively, arms wrapped around her knees, one side of her face resting on top of a kneecap, her eyes solely on him. He sat with one leg raised, an elbow resting on it, the other stretched in front of him.
"You, for example, are living your own reality, but try to suppress it. You hide it from everyone but yourself. Your mind dwells on your life-experiences...On the most traumatic and vile of them all."
Long-lashed lids closed deliberately and Sasuke observed her from the corner of his eye.
"This is what those experiences have done to you," he concluded.
His doll licked her lips. "T-this is all that remains? A wasteland of rain and ice?"
"Yes," he answered dryly. "For now."
She shook her head. "What does that mean?"
"It means that this place can shift to fit your perspective of the outer world. Your thoughts, especially strong ones, affect this place as much as your life experiences. Think of this plane as a...dream."
Her brows furrowed. "A dream?"
His expression was mirthless. "Most people barely have any control over the contents of their dreams. Yet, dreams are the result of their thoughts while awake."
Opal eyes finally lifted to meet his. "Then...like a dream, certain things aren't tangible." In this case, him. That, however, didn't explain why he could touch her chilled flesh without obstruction. Maybe he was one of the few that had control.
He nodded. "For the meantime. With the right practice, you can gain the ability to reign over your own mindscape. As of now, your mind unconsciously controls everything here, but only because you lack experience."
She inhaled deeply, her nostrils stinging from the cold. "Then," she said softly, "I will change it, this place. I'll train, I'll do whatever it takes. I-I want –" to take the reigns of my own thoughts. To be me again.
"You can't change your mind -and therefore your world- overnight," Sasuke inserted. "It's not that simple, Hyuuga."
But she was shaking her head. Seeing the insides of her own mind had made her realize her own powerless state more than ever. "I have to. I must. My family, my friends, they worry about me. I can't let them worry."
Kiba and Shino who helped her get stronger. Neji and Hanabi who had trained with her. Her Father who had taught her the ways of the Gentle Fist.
She refused to let their efforts be wasted. She could no longer wither away like this in their presence.
Firm hands took hold of her shoulders, black eyes looking at her with exasperation.
"Do you ever stop thinking about them?" Sasuke snapped.
She stiffened, the echo of the demand loud and bouncing in her ears.
Everyone always asked her that. It was nothing new to her...but it was him this time, and that, for unknown reasons, changed things.
Sasuke huffed at her silence, a bit peeved. "Worry about yourself first. Focus on what's in front of you for now. In this place, nothing from the outside can hurt you. No physical wounds and no handicaps. In here, your mind cannot be touched by the common shinobi. This is your escape from everything that can cause you harm outside. No enemy, however powerful, can hope to drag you away from here."
The doll seemed to contemplate this, her eyes an open window to her every thought.
"Your body's still outside, but you don't have to feel its pain, or carry its injuries. You're here; do as you please. Your mindset will change," he assured, pushing her hair behind her ear. "But it won't do so in a day."
Her arms tightened around her knees until her knuckles turned pasty white with strain. "My mindset. T-then if my mindset changes, that means that one day the snow..." she muttered quietly.
"Will melt," he finished for her.
"...And the ice? The rain?"
"Will be no more."
"Then...what can I do? What can I be?"
"You can be anything you want," was his reply, uttered in a whisper as his fingers slid up her face, then down her chin, and cupping it to keep her face at an angle that allowed him to consume her completely. Maybe it was a stupid want, but he liked to have her watch him. She had eyes only for him here and no one else, and that, he discovered, was something he found oddly fascinating.
Uchiha-san was a very confusing paradox, Hinata thought again, and couldn't stop the soft sigh that emitted from her lips when his thumb rubbed her cheek in a manner no one had done before.
If only she could reach back and touch his pale features. His hair that resembled wet satin stuck to his cheeks and forehead; it made him look younger. Her eyes softened at the notion.
"After all," he continued. "This is a dream that can be shaped into existence with some training...make with it as you please. In your mind, the limitations are few."
And with that, he was gone, letting her fall back into a dreamless world in which nothing but her and him existed.
XXX
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When Sasuke arrived at the cottage, he felt a set of eyes settle on him.
His footsteps echoed hollowly on the porch as he made his way to his door. He stood in front of it and hummed thoughtfully before reaching toward the lock.
The knob gave way under his fingers, the faint click of gears deafening in the stillness.
He blinked dark eyes lazily. "Tch."
The door was open, the way he left it every day. Only a fool would dare enter his house uninvited, or at all, really.
A fool indeed, he thought as he entered, his ANBU mask and equipment still on his person. He didn't even bother to set down his katana. After all, the pressure of accusatory eyes was burning the back of his head.
Nothing ever gave Sasuke away, and this situation wasn't the exception.
With slow steps, he headed for the kitchen, unveiling his face from the Raven mask and placing it carelessly on the counter as he exited through the back door.
Knowing the owner of the familiar glare, he sure as hell wasn't going to jeopardize his belongings.
Sasuke wasn't a materialistic person, but he wasn't going to destroy his house for an argument that was bound to get heated. Better to do that outside. That way, he'd have more space to stretch and fight, if it came to that, which he, without doubt, believed it would.
Once outdoors, he stayed immobile, a loose wind playing unceasingly with his black mane of hair.
"It's rude to enter people's houses without permission," he said. "Hasn't anyone ever told you that, dobe?"
Naruto, clad in his jonin uniform, spat on the ground, shoving his hands in the pockets of his pants. "Hasn't anyone ever told you it's wrong to lie?" he retorted.
Sasuke smirked wryly for a moment before the gesture vanished. "You should know the answer to that question," he said coolly.
"Where have you been?" Naruto asked, getting rid of the pointless chit-chat, his eyes a stormy blue that sparked with electricity.
"I owe no explanations to you," Sasuke retorted.
Naruto gave no vocal response to that but Sasuke felt his chakra spike.
A blink later, Naruto's hand pinned Sasuke's throat to the ground, his pupils slit like the Bijuu's sealed inside of him, canines enlarged. He banged the raven-haired head's against the hard soil and Sasuke didn't even wince at the impact.
"Why did you lie about Hinata?"
XXX
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"Father."
If Hanabi's voice managed to startle Hiashi out of his feigned meditation inside his personal dojo, he didn't bother to open his eyes and grace the youngest of his heirs with his attention.
But Hanabi didn't let that deter her as she took a step inside, sliding the door behind her with a defined smack.
"Where did you send him?" she demanded, her eyes fierce.
Hiashi answered with one word, his tone coated with an inquiry that didn't sound at all genuine. "He?"
The younger Hyuuga glared at her father's unmoving figure. "Neji-niisan. Where did you send him?"
Hiashi still kept to his meditation and said, smoothly, "I know not what you're talking about, Hanabi."
Silvery eyes, a direct replica of the man's own, narrowed into slits and pink lips were pursed in controlled annoyance. "Let's not beat around the bush, shall we? Don't play innocent with me, for unlike anybody else, I truly know you. You can't fool me."
Hiashi's lids opened slowly.
"I know," Hanabi whispered, her voice harsh in the silence. "I know, father," she repeated, as if to emphasize her claim. "I didn't before, I was blinded by our all-seeing-eye reputation, self-centered in times of struggle. My arrogance made me unaware of the enemy in our mists and my own sister and clansmen paid for it." Her words caught in her throat but she pushed through the tightness in her voice. "Arrogance has always punished us Hyuuga, hasn't it, father?" her eyes became unfocused, glazed, and lost.
Hiashi blinked once, twice, and finally rested his gaze on his youngest. "Why are you here, daughter? What is it that you're getting at?"
"I know," she said simply and Hiashi had to frown at her reply, expecting her to say more, but she didn't.
"Know what?" he finally asked.
Eyes sharpened once again. "I know a monster hurt my sister, and I know you sent Neji-niisan out on a mission. Tsunade-sama has no such demands for a Hyuuga in this moment, so I know he acted on your orders. In fact," she added, fists balling at her sides, "I also happen to know that no Hyuuga has stepped out of the village since Hinata's kidnapping, except when the search parties were sent out."
Hiashi sighed inwardly. Sometimes, Hanabi was too cunning for her age.
"Where did you send Neji-niisan?" she demanded again, eyebrows dipping low over enraged Byakugan eyes.
"That's none of your concerns, Hanabi. Remember your place," Hiashi snapped sternly.
"No," she shook her head, unkempt brown hair falling over her face. "You seem to forget that soon I'll be elected heir again. It's within my right to know what troubles my clan and its members."
Hiashi leveled to his feet. He looked down at the young woman in front of him and saw instead a girl consumed by anxiety, worry, and fear.
"Where did you send him?" she choked, losing all sense of strength. "Where did you send niisan, father?!"
The patriarch crossed his arms over his chest, his demeanor unchanged. "Missions are classified for a reason. Why do you care so much?"
"Because I'm sick with worry!" she snarled. "There is a monster out there, out for our blood, my family's blood. I know we have an enemy, an enemy we probably gained with our arrogance! Arrogance was what divided this clan! Arrogance was what made my sister's early life so miserable that she was scared of her own shadow! This clan made her suffer so much, you have no idea–" she gasped for breath– "You have no idea the life she led because she always hid from you! She has yet to turn twenty, father! You started to pay attention to her when she turned thirteen but before, her life was horrible, and you were oblivious to it. She was always alone, always belittled by your useless pride, and now look at her!" she screamed, wiping away traitorous tears that had managed to escape her eyes. "Six years, father, six years of pseudo stability with a war in-between, and where is she?! She's in a damn hospital, blind, without her Byakugan, without any eyes, scarred, crippled! What's going to happen next to the rest of us, huh?!"
Hiashi's indifference became distress. "Enough Hanabi," he ordered.
But Hanabi still had fuel, and she intended to use it. "Nee-sama worked hard and showed her worth, she worked until she was strong enough to meet your standards. Well," she smiled bitterly and clapped mockingly, "she did. Not only that; she also took a trip with you to who-knows-what forsaken place! Nine months of unstoppable training, and it paid off. She had the title of heiress, a title she never really wanted in the first place. All she wanted was for you to tell her you were proud of her! That damn title has placed her in danger, and all because of you!"
"Your sister knew the dangers that came from being a future clan head for a clan like ours!" Hiashi snapped.
"Like that matters at all!" she yelled back. "That monster – that scum! – only went after her because she was heiress, don't you see?! Where are the rest of my cousins?" she demanded.
Hiashi's silence spoke for itself.
"That's right, father," Hanabi whispered coldly. "They're all dead. Why keep Hinata alive? She didn't bear the Hyuuga's curse seal; her Byakugan was free to take! Instead, they tore it from her. That animal is a monster, and it will pay," she swore through clenched teeth. "It'll pay for all it has done, I'll make sure of it!"
Hiashi's lips pursed, unpleased with the turn the conversation had taken. Everything had come undone in such a small amount of time. He didn't know what to do anymore except plan with Mistuki and the Hokage. But...
"You can't do anything, Hanabi," he finally said.
She glared, and for the first time, Hiashi saw that under her emotions of anger and revenge, there was guilt and immeasurable pain. "I-It should have been me," Hanabi whispered hoarsely, her shoulders shaking with effort at containing herself. "It s-should have been me who was heiress n-not Hinata-nee! Now, look at her!"
She tried to wipe away her tears, but they were coming one after the other, an unstoppable flow that wouldn't cease.
Hardened hands, full of experience and hardships, cupped her cheeks and with the sleeve of his yukata, Hiashi dried her face, although it was pointless.
Her waterfall of salt had come undone.
"Who is it?" she demanded with her strongest, steadiest voice. Her father's hands paused. "Who is it, father? Please tell me who we're up against. Please tell me..."
She could feel his hesitation, his will unwillingness to bend.
"Please."
And then she heard them, the words she wanted, the words she had practically begged for.
"...Very well."
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XXXX
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A/N:Thank you: Bottomless Pit of EMOTIONS, Kandita, BlackBay123, Pandora Lilith (you rock, woman!), wolfmamodo115, Guest 1,2,3,4, flornoir, TheMaidlinEffect, PuppetPrince, alwaysNaruHina, heyla, YukiTenVianey Team, HinaRose, FireGlariator, anlmoon, 21me21, umnia, Cat, pamianime, geeeorge, BekotaTheMonsterHuntress, Fenris Jin, Hida9Achillius9Fiyra, LIZA, Tina, Fiona, TAIRA18, TheUtsukuchiYume, 5K(LOL), SBello, luvhinata, holemesfreak1412, Jullhyanna, Pressing Point, Dechess23, Kibachow, Yazie567, aurora0914, farahb, & Kia-B!
-Pretty please, support this story so that when I get tired of school or have no inspiration whatsoever, I can read your worthy words of wisdom and feel inspired.
-4.6.14.
Revised 5.24.20