Author's Note: Hi lovelies! I must warn — Lily is going to be a mess (with a whole bag of chips on her shoulder, dealing with depression) and James is going to be a jerk (in that special way only teenage boys can be). I love goofy James as much as the next boy-lover, but I wanted to explore him being darker, so while my last fic was a forbidden love story, this will be a tawdry love/hate story…! (I'm not labelling it a romance for a reason.) I always thought how Lily fought falling for James so hard meant he had to have really hurt her somewhere in there.

There will be sex. And foul language. It'll start as an unhealthy/toxic relationship, don't get mad at me :) I'm hoping both teens will go through a lot of growth. (I don't know about you, but I was an IDIOT in high school. Aka when I first named this story and wrote a scene for it. Hopefully it's not blatantly obvious which when it shows up…)

Just so people don't get confused — I will also be jumping between years, but I will always label them so you're not wondering why the hell things are so different all of a sudden. It's mostly canon, but I take some liberties with timing I think.

Blanket Warning: Depression, smut, rough sex, thoughts of suicide, language, racism, sexual assault, bullying, death, gaslighting, violence…. honestly kind of planning on having it all.

Disclaimer: JK Rowling owns Harry Potter. Art work by the awesome Meg (tumblr: anxiouspineapples)

Changes

October, 6th Year

"Potter, do you want to explain to me why the third floor girl's bathroom is currently on fire?" Lily asked furiously, hands on her hips in a show of rage so obvious it had to be fake.

"I don't know, Evans. Your guess is as good as mine," the 16 year old boy in question responded lazily, currently lounging in the Gryffindor common room with his three best mates. "You know you can't assume everything that happens in this bloody castle is my fault, right?" A sexy smirk had overtaken his face as he ran a hand through his messy onyx locks, knowing his actions would only rile up the redhead fuming in front of him further.

"Ha ha, get up," she snarled, making the other black haired teen, sitting next to James, let out a low whistle.

"Damn, Prongs. Sure seems like the witch loves bossing you around." He had impossibly high cheekbones and an air of haughtiness that one had to assume came from inbreeding somewhere in his bloodline.

"She does, doesn't she?" James answered smugly as he got to his feet, following Lily as she stormed out through the portrait hole.

They marched in silence for a solid minute until Lily shoved James behind a tapestry tastefully depicting the Stratford-upon-Avon Massacre of 808.

"Ooo, no, Evans! Where's the fire?" the boy said in a mocking tone as his back slammed against the hidden stone wall. He allowed his body to slump down a bit so his face would be within her reach.

"Shut up," the girl commanded, loosening his tie and opening the buttons of his school shirt, starting at the top. "You know, you could help me the fuck out next time and, I don't know, just come along instead of making me think up all these ridiculous reasons you could possibly be in trouble."

He smiled, making it clear he in no way intended to help her — in the way she was asking of him or with her ardent quest to undress him. That last one he was enjoying far too much as it was. "Oh Lily, why would I ever do that? You know most of the Marauders' most brilliant ideas now come from you, right?"

She grumbled incoherently as she finally finished with his top and splayed her fingers over his freshly exposed abdomen.

"So really," he taunted, "I guess that makes you the true troublemaker here."

Lily let out a strangled noise that could best be described as a growl. "You know what, Potter?" she spat out. "I'm instating a rule six: as little bloody talking as possible."

"Fine by—"

His words were cut off by Lily's lips as she pulled his mouth to hers with reckless abandon.

Fuck, I hate him, she thought as she allowed him to snog her until her knees gave out. And she did. She truly, deeply did despise him. Too bad hatred was currently such a welcome feeling.

Lily Evans was a mess. She knew it. Her peers knew it. To her great shame, she feared even her professors were starting to cotton on.

She had to chuckle at the thought. If knowing her teachers could see through her perfect facade was really so embarrassing, then maybe she wasn't so far gone yet. Desperately wanting to still be viewed as the goody two-shoes she'd always been had to count for something, right? Maybe she wasn't yet beyond repair, or too lost for hope?

Lily snorted. She knew she'd never actually been that good. She had a temper. She could curse — and then when she had learnt that she was a witch, verifiably curse — like it was her job. Her humor was secretly tawdry, her fashion sense (if you could even call it that) bordered on risqué, and she loved nothing more than pushing buttons to get some inevitable pushback. She claimed she hated drama, but wasn't there just an indescribable thrill of getting under someone's skin?

But Lily Evans wasn't like that anymore. She hadn't felt 'vivacious,' 'charming,' 'lovely' or all the words people had bestowed upon her for a while.

She felt… alone, abandoned… lost.

Sure, she was a prefect at Hogwarts, one year away from starting her final classes and probably graduating at the top of her grade (because there was really no one who worked as hard as thee Lily Evans); but she was also just a teenager. A teenager who'd seemingly lost everything in the span of a few short months.

People expected her to be brave and strong — a true Gryffindor. A shining beacon of feminist hope in the form of a beautiful, smart, sharp-tongued heroine. And she was. Anyone who could go through what she had been through and survive was a force to be reckoned with — but she had her moments.

Lily had bouts of crying until her eyes ran dry, and screaming and kicking in the safety of her charmed four-poster bed until she worried the rocking alone would scare her roommates. She couldn't fault herself for that — for feeling the full weight of her emotions as they tore through her, ripping her heart to shreds, leaving nothing but echoes and pathetic murmurs in their wake. She knew indulging in her feelings didn't make her weak — it was when she couldn't feel them at all that she should be worried. She knew when that fire died, and all that was left were useless embers of her former personality, that she was genuinely damned.

Lily didn't want to give up, to give in to this pain that was lurking just beyond the edges, softly calling to her. It would be all too easy considering she was halfway there; but she was a fighter. Lily was a 'firecracker' as her father had always affectionately told her after one too many fights with her older sister. And she sure as shit couldn't disappoint her father now.

Now that he's dead.

Lily felt the icy grip of depression clutching around her insides once more. She felt herself going slowly numb.

October, 5th Year

"Come on, Lily, all the food's gonna be gone!" Mary Macdonald yelled into the bathroom of the 5th year girls' dorm room. It really was the luck of the draw that their year had gotten the highest floor in the Gryffindor tower. They needed something to counteract the bad luck: there had supposedly never been as many girls sorted into one House in a single year as 1971. Eight girls. To make matters even more unfair, there were only four Gryffindor boys in their year. Those boys, the self-proclaimed Marauders, had lamented this skewed ratio at first, but somehow, found it within their hearts to stop complaining around 3rd year.

As it were, far too many girls could always be found trying to use the one bathroom, and Lily… was always late.

"Okay, okay, I'm coming!" Lily said, picking up her bag and slinging it over her shoulder.

Mary, her best friend, would never tell Lily, but it made her extremely jealous that her bestie could roll out of bed and a mere five minutes later feel confident enough (care so little?) to go face the world (aka the rest of the students at Hogwarts).

Lily would never tell a soul that Mary was without a doubt the most beautiful girl she'd ever laid her eyes on and if she wasn't almost (I mean, like 95%) sure that she was straight, she totally would have had a hard time being around her constantly.

Despite these minor secrets, Lily and Mary were thick as thieves. Mary would remind Lily of her latent rebellious side and keep her anxiety at bay while Lily helped focus Mary's constant daydreaming and would stand up to her bullies. Lily had never felt like someone sincerely saw her the way Mary did. It was quite the weight off her shoulders to be the imperfect prefect she was around her. True, Mary wasn't her oldest friend, that title still belonged to Severus, but she was vaguely aware (even if she was very much trying to deny it) that he saw her through the rosiest of colored glasses.

Mary's friendship was jumping out of a plane, knowing you could fly. Severus' was trying to open a parachute and really hoping it would work because you very much didn't feel like dying today.

The girls bounded down the spiral staircase, entering their common room. "So, any good dreams last night?" Mary asked faux-innocently as her own cheeks reddened and she stared resolutely in front of them.

Lily picked up on her friend's shifty behavior right away. "Mary… did I say something again?"

Mary shrugged her shoulders, suppressing a giggle. "Didn't really say anything, more kinda moaned it."

Lily felt her face heat to 1,000 degrees and made a mental note to start closing her bed curtains and learning to perfect the spell to soundproof them. "Fuck! That's not fair! I can't control my own dreams!"

"True," Mary conceded. "But you could do something to make them a reality."

Lily smiled in spite of herself; she knew they were talking about the same boy. "I could, but I was kind of hoping he'd get a move on and do it himself."

"Chicken," Mary joked.

"Well, okay, when's the last time you asked out a boy? It's downright terrifying to put yourself out there like that."

"First off, it's not terrifying when we both know he'd never refuse you, but if you must know: last week," Mary answered swiftly. "It gets easier every time you do it. Sure, the bloke said no, but whatever, Adam's one guy. You just need to get out of your own head." The tiny girl reached over to tap Lily's temple — no easy feat considering Lily was quite tall, and Mary was pocket-sized.

Lily swatted her hand away. "I still want him to be the one to do it," she admitted.

Mary cocked an eyebrow at her; she was on to Lily's cowardice but willing to not harp on it in a show of friendship. "In that case, I really hope he builds up the nerve to ask you out soon. I don't think any of us can survive any more of you guys' prolonged eye contact and amateur attempts at flirting."

"They're not amateur!" Lily cried out flushing deeper as they took their seats in the Great Hall.

"Haaa, interesting. So you don't deny that you're flirting and eye-fucking?" Her hazel eyes twinkled with delight.

Lily had long ago noticed that Mary's eyes were subtly hazel — a warm brown ebbing into an outer ring of palm green. Meanwhile James' were loud: an explosion of color littering his irises with amber, gold, and jade. Lily could stare into his eyes for days… you know, if she didn't become immediately self conscious when he'd inevitably catch her doing so and have to turn away blushing like a little schoolgirl. He'd usually grin like an idiot whenever this would happen and then spend the rest of class animatedly telling his friends about it and trying to catch her gaze again. She would pointedly not look back to him, but would smile harder and harder when she'd hear snippets of his conversation. Words like 'gorgeous' and 'bloody brilliant' had the tendency to stand out.

Truth be told, the sappiness of their budding relationship was almost too much. It was pure. It was innocent. Lily hopelessly wondered if it could turn into love.

"Hi Lily." The boy in question appeared, lingering by the girls while his friends took their seats further down the bench. "Hi Mary," he nodded briefly to her.

"Oh hi, James, we were just talking about you," Mary said conspiringly, ignoring the peeved look Lily shot her way.

"Really?" James looked thrilled.

"Yes." She smiled at him encouragingly. "Did you know Hogsmeade is this weekend?"

James' brows twitched uncomfortably as his hand flew straight into his hair. "Huh, it is, isn't it?" Lily didn't miss that his eyes flickered to her. "You ladies going then?"

Before Lily could respond, Mary jumped in. "We'll see."

James awkwardly shifted his weight from one foot to the other as Lily stabbed a slice of bacon with unnecessary force. "All right," he said uneasily before pivoting. "Lily, save me a seat in Charms?"

Lily finally looked up, beaming. This was the kind of easy-going conversation she could handle. "Of course, I always do."

James mirrored her exuberance. "Brill. You know sooner or later your geniusness is gonna rub off on me, mark my words."

Lily gave him a little wink. "Don't hold your breath."

James' smile went completely lopsided in that way she loved and she bit her lip as he ambled off to his friends, sitting down as Sirius thumped his back.

"Ughhhh, you guys are impossible. It's so obvious to everyone else that you guys fancy each other — get on with it and shag already!" Mary sighed, supporting her forehead in her palm.

"I think I'd settle for a first kiss, thanks," Lily said cheerfully as she popped a strawberry into her mouth. "We can't all lose it at summer camp to some random stud like you, Macdonald."

Mary put her hands up. "I have no regrets. Now I know what all the fuss is about. Or rather what it's not about. What's so exciting about feeling like a guy's lost his keys up your hoo-ha and is trying to fish em out with his prick?"

"Hoo-ha?! Really?" Lily snorted, trying to keep her pumpkin juice in her mouth.

"Fine. My vagina." Mary enunciated every syllable.

"Mary, I love you."

"Obviously, but quit distracting me. You. James. Hogsmeade. It's gotta happen! What is he waiting for? You've been friends who secretly pine for each other for years now."

"Give the guy a break. He only just got taller than me."

"Mm, and he shows no signs of stopping there…"

Lily sighed contently; she'd definitely noticed.

Mary giggled. "Remember in 3rd year when he was eye level with your tits?"

Lily smirked. "I do remember that. Bet he does too, considering that's about when he started being nice to me." They both laughed.

James and Lily had always felt easy, as though fated. He'd teased her the first few years, but in that dumb schoolyard way that made all the adults in her life stupidly tell her he liked her and wanted her attention. 3rd year he'd realized how smart she was and had turned it into a competition, constantly sneaking peeks at her graded tests and papers to see if he could one-up her. To Lily's great chagrin, he ended up being successful some of the time with seemingly little effort — just a desire to impress her.

Things had taken a turn 4th year when his mom died. Lily had gone to the funeral with her parents, unsure of what she could possibly say that would in any way help ease his grief. So she'd just sat with him at the wake, let him hold her hand, let him drag her upstairs to his room, and let him cry on her shoulder as she hugged him. They'd never talked about it afterwards, but Lily knew that was the moment they'd become friends.

Then this year started: 5th year. Suddenly it seemed like all their 15 year old bodies had been spiked with hormones. Their entire class had become hostage to their own flesh and bones that thought about nothing more than snogging and shagging and would betray them with moodiness if those impulses weren't acted upon — thank you very much.

The metamorphosis couldn't have been more evident than with Lily's best friend Mary. They'd gone from sitting on their beds, eating bonbons and making fun of the upperclassmen for constantly getting caught groping one another in the dark corners of the castle to, quite suddenly, Mary confessing that (in an act of teenage rebellion against her too strict mother) she'd slept with a boy at camp. Just like that. Mary's nonchalance on the matter was probably what shocked Lily the most.

She'd always thought of sex as this far-off concept — something adults did, maybe when they loved each other. But really, Lily didn't know… she'd actually never thought about sex that much.

But this was changing. She was starting to think about it now, especially when James' eyes would linger on her new curves. Especially when she'd catch James tripping in the hall just as she'd adjust an article of clothing that was slipping off of her shoulder or riding up her bum uncomfortably. Especially after that time in Potions class when James had grabbed her bare thigh to stop her from accidentally cutting the bat eyes wrong. She'd ended up popping the eye due to the fact that all she could focus on was the delicious sensation of heat pooling between her legs for the first time caused by the tingles she felt emanating from where he was touching her skin. She viscerally remembered not being able to properly breathe as she squirmed in her seat. Lily hadn't been able to say another word for the rest of the period, and James hadn't pushed her too, also seemingly in his own world after the novel contact.

It had been electric.

"Morning Lily, you study for the DADA test?" Severus said sitting down next to her, completely ignoring Mary. He threw a furtive glance over his shoulder to his own House's table. Lily noticed this nervous tick was becoming all too common.

"Of course. Mary and I studied for hours last night. You could have joined us in the library." Lily had tried and tried to get her two closest friends to treat each other amicably. She had yet to make any progress towards the goal, but hey, they still had another two and a half years to try, right? Lily wasn't a quitter.

"I'll see you in class, Lils," Mary said annoyed, gathering her things and leaving the table.

Lily sighed. Most of the time she felt like a child of divorce, getting pulled in both directions and always being made to feel guilty. Always. Sev loved to rant about how Mary got way more time with her, meaning Lily had to constantly point out that, yeah, no shit, we live together.

"Well, I didn't want to interrupt girl time," Severus practically spat. "I don't know how you get anything done with her around; she's always gossiping."

"Right. Because talking about anything related to feelings or interpersonal relationships is just awful." Lily sighed running a hand through her thick hair.

"I thought you enjoyed our talks about magic," Severus complained.

"I do." Lily realized today would not be the day to make any leeway toward her grand plans of a happy friend group.

Severus nodded and folded his arms over his chest as he looked down the table. There was a long beat. "Typical," he muttered darkly.

Lily held back an eye-roll. She loved Sev, and she knew she owed him so much, but he'd become such a judgmental downer lately. There were so few moments anymore when a scowl wasn't twisting his face that she was starting to forget what he'd ever looked like without one. "What Sev?"

"Potter's blatantly staring at you again," he sneered. "He's so arrogant he doesn't even have the decency to hide it anymore."

Not wanting to argue the fact that she thought it would actually be weirder to try to hide staring at someone for a prolonged period of time, her mind still went into overdrive. Wait, is Mary right? Has everyone noticed a relationship shift between James and I?

"I'm sure it's nothing," Lily lied, playing with the hem of her skirt. She really didn't think her growing crush on James was something Severus would want to hear about.

Severus snorted. "Tcha, sure. I don't like the way he looks at you, Lily. It's almost lecherous. You should stay away from him."

"Sev, I know you guys hate each other—"

"He's a bully—"

"But I don't see him like that. You should let it go," Lily tried.

"Seriously?" Severus looked furious. "Just because he treats you well, you don't believe how he treats me?"

Lily saw a classic Sev tantrum coming from a mile away and tried to kindly diffuse the bomb before it blew. "Sev, he's my friend now—"

"Are you really that blind?" he snarled, leaning into her.

"Sev, don't talk to me that way—"

"No, you're acting like an idiot, Lily, and someone's gotta tell you. That's what friends do."

"That's enough," she said, the finality in her voice booming. It wasn't the first time he'd gotten possessive, but it was the first time he'd attacked her intelligence.

Snape took in her rigid posture and flashing eyes. "Fine. But don't come crying to me when you find out I'm right. The git's bad news, Lily, and he will hurt you."

"You've made your point very clear, thanks." She crossed her arms stubbornly. She really wasn't in the mood to hear what she'd feared ever since admitting to herself that she liked James: it was too perfect, and something would go wrong. After all, while it seemed like James was growing up, he was still best friends with Sirius Black — and if anything, that guy was getting meaner and more surly by the day.

Snape gave her one more snort and stalked off.

Lily let out a huge breath she didn't know she'd been holding in and scooped up her bag. She wasn't sure how much longer this friendship could last. With the tension between Snape and her fellow Gryffindors and the growing disapproval from his Slytherins, things were getting — well, really damn messy. Sometimes Lily wished the two of them could just go back to being 9 year olds, trying to jump the highest from the swings to see who could 'fly.'

"Everything all right, Lily?" a deep, low voice interrupted her thoughts. Then again, growing up wasn't all that bad…

"Yeah, he just gets real moody sometimes; he'll cool off," Lily said getting to her feet by James' side. Hopefully.

"Anything I can do to help?" James asked sweetly, motioning to grab her bag for her.

"I got it." She smiled at him; she could most certainly carry her own bag, and deal with Snape.

Lily was true to her word and sat next to James (and Mary) in class. She could practically feel the hole Snape was burning into the back of her head with his incandescent glare.

Multiple times during the lecture, it looked like James was going to write her a note, but he'd always just end up drawing a doodle instead. Lily tapped her wand to his Snitch sketch and made it flutter across his page, much to his delight.

"You're incredible, you know that?" he whispered to her reverently.

"I know," she simpered back.

September, 6th Year

"You're such a fucking cunt, Potter! Why can't you just pull your unusually large head out of your damn fucking arsehole for one bloody fucking second?!" Lily furiously whisper-yelled, dabbing at the lime green pus now coating her formerly white shirt. Potter had 'accidentally' burst a Snargaluff pod all over her.

"Fucking cunts and arseholes? Wherever is your head at these days, Evans?" James answered easily. Lily's treacherous class partner (some Ravenclaw wench) giggled.

"Fuck you," Lily grumbled, trying but failing to use charms to make the burning on her chest stop.

"We've been over this Evans, no. Not even if you beg me for it," he drawled casually. He was enjoying watching her struggle.

Lily turned from him grimacing, hastily trying to remove her shirt as stealthily as possible, all while avoiding the goop with her fingers.

"Oy, Professor!" Sirius called from where he was leaning back in his stool, trying to get a better view of her unintentional show. "Evans is stripping again!" She heard him do a 'Slag!' cough and gritted her teeth.

She was able to tear her ruined top off and pull her robe over her bra before too many people got an eyeful. Unfortunately, the Marauders' table was right next to hers.

"Miss Evans! Are you quite all right?" Professor Purdy asked hobbling over to her. He was a kind old man who'd been talking about how it was nearly time to retire for Lily's entire school career. She could tell he loved Herbology too much to let go of teaching it quite yet.

"Yes, sorry Professor, a pod exploded, won't happen again." She shot James a look that screamed, 'I will get my revenge, you just wait.'

"Oh! Oh my, are you hurt, dear? You should probably go to Madam Pomfrey to make sure your skin isn't too badly burnt."

"Thank you, Professor," Lily said. She wasn't happy about missing the rest of class, but her skin was already killing her.

"Mr Potter, why don't you accompany Miss Evans to the hospital wing?"

"Oh, no need Professor, I'd rather die," Lily replied so sweetly Purdy nodded before tilting his head to the side in realization. By that time, Lily was already out of the greenhouse and speed-walking to the castle.

James shrugged at the ancient professor. "Women."

On the lawn, Lily heard someone calling her name, and was half ready to hex the offender into oblivion until she realized it was Remus.

"Damn, you walk fast," the scrawny but tall, dirty blond panted as he fell into step with her.

"Remus," she acknowledged. She wasn't sure if she could say anything else at the moment. Once again his friend had utterly, publicly humiliated her. Once again she was being made to look weak in front of her peers. Once again he was acting like a 13 year old boy tugging on her pigtails for no fucking reason.

"Does it hurt?" he asked concerned.

Lily's eyes sliced toward him, barely suppressed tears brimming in her eyes

"Right, dumb question," Remus continued. "I'm sure he didn't actually mean to—"

Lily snorted cruelly.

"Right," he finished lamely. They walked the rest of the way in silence.

A young healer with tight blonde ringlets came out of her office as soon as they walked in. "Mr Lupin, what seems to be the problem?"

Lily assumed frequent hospital visits came with the Marauder turf.

"It's not me, Poppy, it's Lily." Poppy?! "She got exposed to Snargaluff pus."

"Oh my, that's not pleasant." Madam Pomfrey turned to Lily. "Where's the afflicted area?"

Lily embarrassedly motioned towards her bosom currently covered by her school robes with an open palm. "Very well. We'll need to put salve on it and let it sit for several hours. Mr Lupin," she turned to the other equally red-faced teen, "you can help Miss Evans by collecting the rest of her assignments for the day."

"Of course," Remus replied a little too fast, looking thoroughly relieved. What did he think he was going to need to help with? Lily internally scoffed.

With that, Pomfrey shut the curtains around Lily and helped her remove her clothes from her already inflamed skin. "Tut tut, this may sting a little." She summoned a tube of salve as she directed Lily to lie down on the bed. "Risky business puttering with class six magical plants. Very risky indeed." It was a testament to Madam Pomfrey's professionalism that rubbing thick paste all over Lily's chest didn't seem too horribly awkward. "This needs to set for at least three hours while you get some rest."

"Um, what is it?" Lily asked curiously.

Pomfrey showed her the tube and Lily eagerly read the ingredients. "It's good for all sorts of magical burns, but not Blast-Ended Skrewts burns, never Blast-Ended Skrewts," she mumbled, looking off to the floor, clearly lost in a memory.

"Why not?"

"The Dittany in it reacts badly to their fire, we don't yet know why, it hasn't been properly researched considering they're a new breed," she answered briskly. "Why do you ask?"

"Oh, uh," Lily looked at her hands. "I want to be a healer after I graduate," she admitted sheepishly. She wasn't sure if she'd ever told anyone that other than McGonagall last year; it wasn't like anyone else cared.

Pomfrey gave her a pleased nod. "Very well. You may come by my office any time if you have any questions," the healer stated matter-of-factly. "But now, you must rest. You may summon me if you require any further assistance." And with that, she promptly snapped the curtains closed, leaving Lily alone with her thoughts.

Lily sunk into her pillows, staring up at the chandelier above her, cold and in pain. I'm going to fucking end Potter. Her fervent rage kept her awake for a good hour until the salve started to work its magic, sending a soothing cool through her skin. The relief lulled her into a relaxed sleep.

Too bad it didn't last. When she awoke, it looked like the sun was setting.

"Fucking finally," an irritatingly familiar male voice broke through her sleepy haze.

"What the fuck?!" Lily shrieked, trying to pull up her blanket only to realize she was lying on top of it. Instead, she ended up mashing her breasts together and out of view under her hands. She hissed as the burn made the skin extra sensitive.

"Shh, Evans! You'll get me thrown out," James said quietly, getting to his feet and dropping a pile of notes on her lap.

"Good! You shouldn't be here!" Lily sniped, causing James to roll his eyes as he cast a muffling spell around the curtains. "Why the fuck are you?"

"I'm here, Evans, to tell you about what you missed in class today and give you your homework." He pointed to the papers. "So maybe, a 'thank you' is in order."

"A 'thank you'? A fucking 'thank you'?!" Lily looked like she was going to blow in 3… 2… "Potter, the only reason I'm in here is because you attacked me with pus!"

"I told you, that was an accident, I got excited—"

"And now my chest is on fire—!"

"Yeah it is—"

"Will you just shut up?! Shut the fuck up, and get out!"

"Lily, I'm really—"

"GET OUT!" she screeched, truly losing any last composure she had left.

"All right, all right, jeez, calm down." James backed away from her. "Last time I try to do something nice for you." His hand lingered on the opening between the curtains, looking over his shoulder. "By the way, your tits look amazing, even covered in paste."

Lily screamed as she hurled her water glass at his retreating form. The nerve! The bloody fucking nerve of that complete wanker! Of course Potter is the first bloke to see my tits. The universe's hatred of me strikes again! I need to tell Mary— her brain caught up with reality. She couldn't tell Mary. She may never be able to tell Mary anything ever again.

Please let me know what you think!

Next Chapter: I'm Fine