Underpaid, Undersexed, and Under Custodio

Chapter 7: When in Rome…

There was a gentle knock at the door, followed by a silky-smooth feminine voice, "Miss Baraja, are you awake?"

It was quiet, but just loud enough to wake the room's inhabitant.

Neia slowly stirred from what was admittedly one of the most comfortable nights of sleep she had ever experienced, even with the circumstances being as they are. She could feel the smooth silk sheets caressing her skin, inviting her back into their warm embrace.

She almost obliged them, but another knock sounded, this time ever so slightly louder, "Miss Baraja?"

Neia quickly sat up, rubbing the sleep from her eyes before groggily replying, "Y-yes, I'm awake, you can come in!"

The door to the room slowly swung open and Cixous, this time in her proper uniform, entered with a respectful bow, "Good morning, Miss Baraja. I am sorry to wake you but Lord Ainz has informed me that you are going to be accompanying him once more today, he asks that you prepare yourself for departure."

Neia just sat there for a moment, the fog of sleepiness still hovering over her, until she processed the words and her eyes widened.

'H-how long have I been asleep?'

Neia immediately sprung out of bed, thankfully she had fallen asleep with her squire uniform still on, which saved her from some potential embarrassment, she looked Cixous in the eyes before asking in a somewhat panicked voice "How long do I have?"

Cixous' eyes were wide as well, she stared at Neia for a few moments, blinking a couple times before a wide smile came across her face, "Ah, there is no need to worry, Miss Baraja. Lord Ainz has informed me of this a few hours in advance, I decided it would be best to wake you sooner rather than later so that you had more time to prepare."

At this Neia breathed a sigh of relief before giving Cixous a small smile in return, "Thank you, Miss Cixous. That was very thoughtful of you…"

Cixous' smile grew a little wider, "It is no problem at all, Miss Baraja. I know how important it is to do your best for Lord Ainz, whether it be looking your best or being on time… I am very happy to see that you understand that as well."

Neia gently plopped herself back down on the bed and started to slip her boots on, "So, I have a couple hours to get ready then? What would you recommend I do?"

Cixous wore a faux thoughtful expression, before politely continuing, "Well, I think a visit to the baths would be prudent, I can launder your clothing there as well, and after that we could head to the cafeteria for breakfast if you are hungry."

Neia looked down at her uniform, which was still definitely soiled from the previous day's events, and gave a sheepish apology, "Yeah, I probably should have taken off these clothes before I slept in this really nice bed… I'm sorry for that."

Cixous merely shook her head, "Not at all, Miss Baraja. We maids clean all the bedding very regularly whether they have been dirtied or not, it's no extra trouble I assure you." There was a momentary pause before she continued, "So would you like me to lead you to the baths?"

Neia quickly responded, "Oh, yes please. That would be nice," before slipping on her other boot and standing up.

Cixous simply nodded and gestured for her to follow, "Right this way, Miss Baraja."

As Neia walked beside the maid she found herself deep in thought, 'So far, this has been nice. Really nice. I can't say I'm not still worried, a little scared even, but so far I really haven't been given much reason to feel that way…' Neia's eyes slowly drifted back to the maid walking beside her, 'Cixous is really quite nice. If a sweet, normal, girl like her can be so happy as the Sorcerer King's subordinate then that's a good sign…'

Cixous seemed to notice Neia's staring as she turned her head towards her and gently asked, "Is something wrong, Miss Baraja?"

This snapped Neia back to reality and she quickly blurted out the first thing that came to mind, "N-not at all, I was just thinking about how nice you are, Miss Cixous."

Cixous stopped in her tracks, her eyes widening once more. Neia quickly followed suit.

'D-did I seriously just say that? I really ought to-'

Neia's thoughts were once more cut short when Cixous gave her widest smile yet, "Oh, I am really glad you think that, Miss Baraja! I think you are quite nice as well," there was a brief pause, "You know, now that you are a subordinate of Lord Ainz we don't have to be so formal, you can just call me Cixous, no need for the 'Miss'…." She quickly added, "Only if you would like that, that is."

Neia needed a second to process what she just heard, 'That… actually worked out?'

After a short moment of slightly awkward silence Neia quickly spoke, "T-that sounds good… Cixous. You can just call me Neia if you like."

At this Cixous gave a little nod, a smile still on her face, and continued walking down the hall.

Neia was feeling a lot better after that exchange, she recalled how the King seemed to really like the idea of her being friends with her new comrades, maybe her little slip up had actually been a good call?

Well, good strategic call or not, she didn't mind having a new friend. Especially with how crazy the last few days had been, Neia found herself thinking about Gustavo for the first time since she was whisked away here. She didn't really think too much of it at the time, but he was a friend to her, maybe not the best friend, but a friend nonetheless.

The two girls walked on in near silence, Neia once again deep in thought, while Cixous faintly hummed an unfamiliar but pleasant tune.

The walk to the spa was surprisingly short, but when Neia entered she found that the place was far more than a simple bathhouse. It was a complex, with a huge hall leading to what looked like around twenty different rooms, all of which were massive in their own right. For a moment Neia was concerned that they were in the wrong place, but quickly brushed it off, it made perfect sense that the Sorcerer King would have an area the size of a small palace specifically made for bathing and relaxation. He could have just about anything at this point.

Cixous lead her into the closest room, which Neia soon discovered was a changing room, and she was lead to the women's area. Neia sheepishly entered the astonishingly luxurious space which was built just as a place to take off your clothes of all things. Cixous gave an encouraging nod and chose to stand outside, for the sake of privacy.

Neia quickly picked up on the procedure and stripped out of her clothing, neatly folding and stacking the dirty clothes in a small pile. She tied a ridiculously expensive-feeling towel around her body and grabbed her dirty clothing before heading back out into the hallway.

Cixous was patiently waiting for her, still happily humming the same tune which she stopped doing in favor of speaking, "Are you ready to have your bath? There are many to choose from, but I usually use the Roman Bath, which is what I would recommend if you just wish to clean yourself."

'Roman? I've never heard of that before, but I'll take her word for it,'

Neia nodded, "That sounds just fine, thank you Cixous."

Cixous smiled again, "Just this way then, I think you will really enjoy it!" There was a little hint of excitement in her voice, which was a little infectious, as Neia could feel her spirits lighten just that little bit more.

The "Roman" bath wasn't far down the hall, being one of the first rooms in line. When Neia entered the door marked as the women's bath she could immediately see the change in atmosphere. The floors and walls were all made entirely of pale white marble, giving the entire room a sterile feeling, but that wasn't all. The entrance itself was through a massive archway, onto which was carved a display of numerous powerful-looking creatures, at the center of which was the Sorcerer King. When she entered the room proper she saw massive pillars skirting the edges of the room, in between which were massive marble statues which, surprisingly enough, depicted humans.

Neia didn't recognize the men being depicted, of course, but she could tell that they were somehow important. Before Cixous could say anything Neia found herself walking up to one of the statues and looking at a small plaque at its feet, the language was something she had never witnessed before. So she just looked up at the man curiously for a moment instead, the man's features were nothing special, but it was a beautiful piece of work nonetheless.

Cixous finally spoke up, "I thought you might like this room, it is one of my favorites… the bath also feels nice, the water is already heated, if you would hand me your clothes I could start washing them."

Neia took a few steps back from the statue and gave an embarrassed nod, "Oh, yeah, thank you very much." She then gingerly handed her clothes to Cixous, who happily took them and walked over to the corner of the room, where there was a station set up for just that purpose.

Neia subconsciously decided to stick close to Cixous, and picked the spot closest to the corner to slip off the towel and sink into the warm water.

A contented sigh escaped her lips as the warm water soothed her body and she felt her muscles loosen up slightly. She just sat like that for a moment, savoring the feeling of the water, before she began washing herself.

Soon enough she heard Cixous begin to scrub her clothes, and felt a little bad about having her do all the work, "Sorry, I wasn't thinking when I agreed to have you do that, you don't need to if you don't-"

Cixous cut her off, "It's no problem, I might as well while we are here, and it will save a lot of time if I do it while you bathe. We wouldn't want to keep Lord Ainz waiting, would we?"

Neia rapidly shook her head, "No, of course not. I guess if you are alright with it…" Cixous let out a hum of confirmation and there was a short silence between them again.

'Hey, maybe now would be a good time to ask a few questions, Cixous doesn't seem like she would have any real insider information but she still knows way more than I do…'

Neia spoke up, "Hey, Cixous, would you mind if I asked you some questions?"

The reply was instant, "Of course not, ask away."

Neia was a little surprised by the swift reply but brushed it off, "Thanks… let's start off small I suppose, you have clearly already bathed, how long ago did you wake up? Actually, how long was I asleep for that matter?"

Cixous took on a sincerely thoughtful look for a moment before replying, "Well, I don't have an exact measurement, but I would guess that you slept for about seven hours, I woke up around three hours ago to get ready for the day, I even did a little cleaning before Lord Ainz contacted me."

Neia thought about that for a moment, seven hours wasn't bad, especially in that nice bed, but she didn't know when exactly she went to sleep the night before… the paladins would likely be leaving fairly early in the morning, wouldn't the king want to be there before they continued the journey? She considered that for a moment before coming to the conclusion that it didn't really matter, they would either wait for the king if he was late, or they would simply leave without his say-so and they would teleport back into his carriage regardless…

She submerged her head into the warm water to wet her hair, before emerging again, 'I guess I shouldn't worry about this kind of thing, the Sorcerer King knows what he's doing, I actually have a competent superior now…'

That was all well and good, but then Neia did a double-take.

'Wait, if I slept for seven hours and Cixous woke up three hours before me…'

Neia turned around and looked to where Cixous was scrubbing her tunic, she seemed well rested but Neia couldn't help but ask, "Cixous, aren't you really tired right now?"

Cixous seemed legitimately surprised by this, "N-no, not at all. Why would you say that? Do I seem like I'm tired?" A little hint of worry crept into her voice at that last part.

Neia shook her head, "No, you really don't, and that's what surprises me. You are telling me you only slept for four hours last night? And that you've already done some work on top of that? If I were you I'd be half dead right now…"

Cixous looked puzzled for a moment before a wave of realization hit her and she let out a laugh, "Oh, I see, you must think that I am a human!"

Neia was shocked, but then she remembered something…

'That's right! When she was leading us down into that dungeon under the palace at E-Rantel I could have sworn she referred to us as "humans" under her breath. I can't believe I forgot about that… but she seems…'

Without thinking, Neia bluntly voiced her surprise, "Really? I could have sworn you were human…"

Cixous let out another little giggle, "Well, I'm really not, I'm actually a Homunculus."

'A Homunculus? I've never heard of one of those before…'

Neia felt like an apology would be appropriate, "I'm sorry, I hope I didn't offend you by assuming something like that…"

Cixous gave a sweet smile and shook her head, "Oh, not at all. I know that we look very similar to humans, and we really aren't all that different. Homunculi are artificially created beings, I guess we are technically constructs, but other than that we are very similar to humans. Our bodies are naturally a little stronger, and they require less sleep than a human's body would since we get more of our energy through the consumption of food, more than the average human by a large margin. Sleep just isn't as important to us."

This was very interesting to Neia, but the remnants of the little paladin-to-be inside of her took the reins for a moment and asked, "You said you are naturally stronger, how much stronger?" She could hear the slightest bit of discomfort creep into her own voice, and she felt a little guilty for even asking such a thing.

Cixous seemed to notice this and stopped scrubbing the tunic, turning to Neia and holding her arms out in front of her with a reassuring wave, "Oh, just barely, you have nothing to worry about, I am certain that you are much stronger than I am."

Neia became visibly less stressed at that, she didn't really understand it at that moment but the idea of her not being the weakest person in a room for once was incredibly reassuring.

Cixous seemed to notice this and her voice became more serious, "Neia, I can tell that you aren't used to how things are in Nazarick yet, and that you want to know more. I think this could be a good learning experience for you."

Neia raised an eyebrow before looking Cixous in the eyes and listening with great interest as she continued, "In truth there are very very few humans here, many of this place's inhabitants are far stronger than even the strongest humans you have ever met," her voice lowered to a whisper, "and some of them are not very fond of humans at all."

Neia felt a shudder run through her as she recalled the Sorcerer King's offhand comment from the previous night.

Cixous hesitated for a moment before continuing, "I can tell that you learning of my true nature made you a little uncomfortable, but if you want to fully adapt to this place then you will need to adjust to things like this. I'm sorry if I accidentally lead you to believe I was something that I'm not, but I don't mind that you are human… and I really hope you don't mind that I'm not." Neia could detect a little hint of sadness in those last few words and she could see Cixous' expression drop a little.

Neia frantically shook her head, "No, I don't mind that at all! Human or not you are still you, right? I don't care if I'm the only human here, so long as someone doesn't treat me poorly I don't see why we can't be friends…"

This seemed to reassure Cixous, as her expression lifted once more, "I am really glad to hear that you feel that way, I hope that the rest of us give you a chance…"

A long silence followed, as Cixous turned back to the washboard and continued scrubbing Neia's tunic, Neia continued washing herself for a few minutes before she spoke again, "I actually have a few more questions," Cixous gave a little nod so Neia continued, "What exactly do you mean when you say you were 'artificially created'? And, although this one is a little more personal, yesterday I had a meeting with Pandora's Actor where he referred to His Majesty as 'Father', and I don't know what to make of that… do you know why he would refer to His Majesty like that?"

Cixous finished scrubbing the tunic and moved onto the leggings as she answered, "I meant it quite literally when I said artificially created, Homunculi are created with raw materials through an alchemical ritual instead of being birthed into the world. I was created by one of the Supreme Beings, although this isn't unique to me and my fellow Homunculi. Almost all of the beings in Nazarick were created by the Supreme Beings themselves, constructs or not. This is also probably why Pandora's Actor called Lord Ainz 'Father', I think he was created by Lord Ainz himself, so he may very well view him as a human might view a parent."

Suddenly things started making much more sense to Neia, as she began to slowly connect the dots, "Is that why you are so… passionate about His Majesty? Do you view him as a parent?"

Neia was surprised when Cixous shook her head, "No, that is not the case. I wasn't created by Lord Ainz, I was created by another Supreme Being known as Lord Whitebrim. I view him as my father," Neia noticed Cixous' tone waver a little as she continued, "but Lord Ainz was Lord Whitebrim's close friend, and he is the only Supreme Being left in Nazarick, so he has my utmost loyalty and my unending adoration. Many of the others in Nazarick will tell you similar stories, I am sure."

Neia felt as if she might have tread over a bit of a sore spot, Cixous didn't seem to enjoy speaking about the subject so Neia decided to steer the conversation elsewhere, "Thank you for telling me all of this, one more thing though, do you have any advice for me on how to better adapt to all this?"

'Now that was a good question to ask, I'm sure Cixous has some level of insight on-'

Neia's thought was cut short when Cixous gave her an apologetic shrug, "I'm sorry, Neia, but you are in a very unique situation. I am actually in close contact with another human who was taken under Lord Ainz's wing, but she only really works with me and the other Homunculus maids… your position is much different. You are working directly with Lord Ainz…"

Neia could hear a hint of envy in the maid's voice as she continued, "That is a great privilege indeed, but also a great responsibility. To serve a Supreme Being directly is… a really big deal, to put it simply. I am sure that you will be dealing with many of Lord Ainz's higher-ranked subordinates, and I'm afraid I don't know much about them past the basics. If I had to give you one piece of advice it would be that you should always serve Lord Ainz as best as you can and with absolute loyalty, that is the one thing that will earn some level of respect from everyone here. Our one universally shared virtue."

Cixous gave a little smile, "But I am sure you were going to do that anyways."

Neia simply nodded back at her and allowed herself to sink deeper into the bath's warm water, this was all a lot to process, but Neia was thankful for the information, 'I am really am lucky to have someone like Cixous to tell me all of this. I still feel like I am walking around in the dark here but at least now I have someone with a Wand of Sparking to occasionally flash some light my way.'

A small smile grew on her face as she once again allowed herself to simply relax, enjoying the feeling of the warm water on her skin.

Ainz was quickly remembering why he had given up on reading reports entirely, but now that he was going to start actually doing his job as an Overlord he supposed he couldn't help it. He had already finished reading one from Albedo and was just finishing another from Pandora's Actor.

His red pinprick eyes skirted across the final line of the report and he let out an internal sigh, 'It's only been a couple hours and Pandora's Actor has already jumped straight into the project at full steam. I hope I can keep up with him, I might be undead but while I don't tire there is still no way I can match his level of energy.'

The doppelgänger had already tested a couple methods for distribution, a system of one-use enchanted rings that would show the film to a single person, which was far too inefficient to really be considered. The other was an idea for magical projection, which Ainz recognized as an analogue to the film projectors that used to exist in theaters and such back in his world. Although that was ancient history compared to the tech of his day he could see it working here.

Pandora's Actor ended the report with an assurance that he was already pursuing ideas on how to make this magical projector a reality, and a request for permission to requisition some resources from Demiurge's farm of all places.

Ainz stamped his approval without a second thought and then neatly stowed the report away before looking to what was easily the most dread-inducing thing he had seen in a long while, Demiurge's "report" which to Ainz looked a lot more like a volume to an encyclopedia.

Ainz saved this one for last, and with good reason. Albedo's really wasn't that bad, just a broad overview of how everyone's assignments were coming along, not a fun read but not a particularly difficult one either. Pandora's Actor's report was actually a rather pleasant read, the doppelgänger's enthusiasm all but bleeding through the pages, which warmed Ainz's nonexistent heart by the smallest amount.

Demiurge's report, however… Ainz had taken the liberty of opening up to a random page of the tome and was met with an entire page of small print, paragraphs upon paragraphs of mind-numbingly specific and yet still bafflingly vague technical jargon. Ainz decided then that he would come back to it after finishing the others, and now here he was.

Ainz desperately looked for an excuse to put it off, even for just a moment longer, and eventually found one. He quickly cast message, informing Cixous of his plans for the day and for his new subordinate. Unfortunately, this only took a moment, and he soon found himself once again eyeing the report.

Ainz sighed before trying his best to pump himself up and diving straight in like a champ.

'Fine. Let's do this.'

Seconds.

Minutes.

Hours.

Demiurge's report was supposed to be a simple update on how he is moving to manage the new plan, how many humans he was expecting to move, when he was going to move them, how long it would take, how much Nazarick resources he needed to requisition for his army, simple questions with simple answers, right?

Apparently not.

Perhaps the demon had taken the fact that Ainz had personally requested this report as some sort of challenge because Ainz was currently reading the caption for the graph located on the backside of a page labeled 'Chapter 13, Subsection 15(c), Diagram 3'. The caption was a worded explanation of what the graph was displaying, which was the predicted amount of meat required over time to sustain his army within the northeastern quadrant of a section of the kingdom Demiurge had dubbed "Sector C2".

All of this of course taking into account the presence of local animals which could be hunted for meat, the expected margin of error within his calculations and necessary buffers in case of an outlying case scenario, the possibility of any battlefield casualties lessening the requirements, requested tools to limit spoilage, and…

Ainz wanted to die, again.

'What the hell am I doing? If I wanted to read a legal code I would have gone to law school…'

Ainz finally gave up and decided to flip through the report, moving to the end of each chapter to see a broader overview of what was happening, thankfully this seemed to work well enough.

That gave Ainz an idea. He thought on it for a moment before chuckling to himself and casting Message, "Demiurge, are you busy right now?" Ainz received a negative and so continued "Good, I just wanted to say that I have finished your report and that I am very impressed with your commitment to providing such a large amount of information, you have done a truly magnificent job…"

Through the line Ainz thought he could hear Demiurge choke up a little, "I-I am thrilled to hear that, Lord Ainz, I made sure to put all of my effort into it! From now on I-"

Ainz quickly cut off the demon, "Yes, yes, you have done very well. However, I have a request for your future reports."

At this Demiurge instantly went silent and began listening intently as Ainz continued, "Perhaps from now on you could include an addendum at the end of each report, this being a condensed summary of the broader ideas within the report. This would be useful for providing a looser idea of our plans to those who do not need to know the details," Ainz could hear Demiurge breathe in to begin protesting so he quickly cut him off once more, "or to give to those who are on a less trusted level, but who still need to know some things, less opportunity to leak sensitive information."

Demiurge seemed satisfied with this, but he still asked, "My apologies, Lord Ainz, but may I inquire as to who exactly these less trusted individuals would be? We have never needed to collaborate with outsiders to the point of writing special reports…"

'Oh… that's…' Ainz facepalmed.

To be honest, that excuse was something Ainz had just pulled out of his ass to make Demiurge go along with making his unlife easier, but now… he had to actually think of something.

Suddenly, it came to him, "Yes, as you know I have acquired a new subordinate from outside Nazarick. One which, by necessity, I will be working with very closely into the foreseeable future. These addendums would be for her, so please make them simple enough that a human could understand what is happening. Oh, and be sure to leave out any hints of our deeper involvement with the current plight of the Holy Kingdom. No more beastman food reports will be required, you have my permission to use as much of our food stores as you need."

Ainz gave himself a little pat on the back for that save, no more meat logistics for him!

The line was silent for a moment before Demiurge spoke again, "Yes, these addendums shouldn't be an issue at all, my lord…" There was a pause before Demiurge reluctantly continued, "My deepest apologies, Lord Ainz, as for this new subordinate I was never briefed on that development… I will make an attempt to remain better aware of such things in the future."

Ainz remained silent for a moment before once again facepalming, this time with more force, 'Did I seriously forget to… Ok, I need to get my act together or I'm going to have a serious fuckup one of these days. Who knows what would have happened if someone like Albedo or Shalltear saw a human girl prancing around Nazarick claiming to be my new assistant…'

Ainz shuddered at the very thought.

"Hello there, mind telling me who you are? Hmm?"

Neia thought she was scared when Remedios nearly decapitated her, but back then her brain was just screaming at her. Right now it was penciling out an apology letter to the rest of her body and locking itself in the closet to cry.

Just five seconds ago she was getting ready to exit the bath, not a care in the world. Now she was face-to-face, and she meant face-to-face, with a very fast, very strong, very creepy, very naked, angry thing with glowing red eyes.

Neia couldn't help it, she began to let out a terrified scream but was quickly muffled when the creature grabbed her face in a death grip and covered her mouth.

The thing stared her down for a moment before speaking again in a strange sing-song voice, "I thought I smelled something foul in here, but there's no need to have a foul attitude too… you will have plenty of time to scream later, although that nasty glare of yours probably won't last too long…"

Neia gulped, her body beginning to shake.

"You know, I'm feeling generous today, if you tell me who you are right now I might just kill you before I start eating you. It'll be my little treat."

Then it smiled.

It is at this point that Cixous finally spoke up in a panicked voice, "L-Lady Shalltear!"

The thing Neia now knows to be "Shalltear" looked up at the maid and her expression became one of confusion, "Oh, I didn't see you there…"

Neia couldn't turn her head to look at her, as Shalltear's hand was still firmly holding her head in place, but she really felt like Cixous should be running right now instead of trying to save her.

Shalltear looked back and forth between the two for a moment before asking in an obviously confused voice, "What is going on here? Why is there a human in my bath? More importantly, why is this human in my bath? Who the hell is she?"

Cixous' voice came again, this time sounding far more calm and collected, "That is Miss Neia Baraja, Lord Ainz's new subordinate."

Neia felt herself slowly begin to calm down, 'Thank you, Cixous! You probably just saved my-'

"Never heard of her."

Silence.

'Oh… oh no.'

At this point Shalltear finally decided to let go of her face, Neia would have tried to run but her back was to the wall of the bath, she was waist-deep in water, and after seeing firsthand how fast that thing could move she really didn't like her chances. One consolation was that the creature was… short?

With this realization, Neia decided to get a better look at the thing that had just threatened to eat her.

It looked like a girl, younger than her, probably somewhere around fourteen years old. Her most notable features were her pale skin, pure white hair, and, of course, her unnaturally deep red eyes. Neia would have thought her cute had she not just ambushed and threatened to kill her.

Cixous spoke again, seemingly surprised by Shalltear's confusion, "Has Lord Ainz not informed you of this? He delivered her to me personally last night…"

For a moment Neia was hopeful that this would smooth things over a bit but was once again shocked when Shalltear's face became one of poorly veiled rage, "Oh really? Lord Ainz personally delivered her? Last night? What are you playing at here? Do you know who you are talking to?"

Thankfully, well, thankfully for Neia, this anger seemed to be directed at Cixous.

"You seriously expect me to believe something as insane as that? Lord Ainz personally bringing this pathetic little worm into Nazarick? You are creative, I'll give you that. I ought to have you strung up for that, or maybe something a little more fun…" Shalltear let out a creepy giggle and Neia began to feel sick to her stomach.

'I can't just let this happen, I need to say something!'

Neia mustered all of her bravery to whimper out, "S-she isn't lying."

Shalltear's head snapped back to Neia and a chill went up her spine, "Who gave you permission to speak? Annoy me again and I will just kill you, you don't seem like much fun anyway." This was followed by a dismissive wave, which left Neia completely frozen in place. She didn't doubt those words for a second.

Shalltear's attention was once again directed at Cixous, "How the hell do you expect me to believe all this? Assuming you are telling the truth, something like this is relatively big news, news a Floor Guardian would most certainly know about."

Neia was shocked to hear that Cixous' voice was not only unwavering, but confident, when she replied, "Lady Shalltear, I am acting in accordance with Lord Ainz's direct orders. If you do not believe me then you can contact him right now and confirm it, but any actions that you take against either myself or Neia would directly conflict with his wishes."

Neia didn't know where Cixous was getting all of this confidence, but she was clearly asking to get herself killed with that attitude. She half expected the creature to just jump out of the bath and kill Cixous then and there

However, that's not what happened. Instead, Shalltear took a single step back, and her face scrunched up in confusion, "For some reason I feel like you could be telling the truth, so I am going to contact Lord Ainz."

Her face then became extremely serious, "But, if you make me waste Lord Ainz's time just to find out you lied to me…"

"I am going to do terrible terrible things to both of you."

There was no creepy giggle after that, just silence.

Ainz hung up his line with Demiurge, in the end, he got him to in effect dumb down his reports to a more easily digestible form. Which Ainz felt was a pretty big win, especially knowing the demon. He also ordered him to contact the rest of the guardians with the Neia memo, pinning the blame for the lost information on a nameless summon.

'Well, now that that is all taken care of, I suppose it's time to-'

Ainz was cut off when he received a message, from Shalltear of all people.

'I just got off the line with Demiurge, there is no way he had already contacted her with the information…'

Ainz quickly answered the message, "What is it, Shalltear?"

A shrill feminine voice sounded in his head, "I am terribly sorry for this sudden interruption Lord Ainz, but I am currently standing next to what seems to be an intruder and a traitor, I would have skinned them alive ages ago but they both claim to be here on your orders…"

'Damnit. Just when I thought I had gotten away with it too!'

Ainz cut her off, "If you are referring to a new human subordinate by the name of Neia Baraja and one of the Homunculus maids, Cixous, then I assure you that they are both telling the truth."

There was a long moment of silence before Shalltear just dumbly exclaimed, "Really!?"

'I don't even blame her for that. I would probably say the same in her position.'

Ainz sighed, still needing to keep up his regal tone, "What kind of question is that? Yes, really. Tell me what has happened."

Shalltear gave a hasty apology for her stupid comment and spoke again, "I-I give my sincerest apologies, Lord Ainz, it appears I have made a mistake here…"

Ainz rubbed his temple, 'If I have to use a Wand of Resurrection because of this I'll never forgive myself.'

'Miss Baraja might not either.'

Ainz shook the thought from his head and quickly ordered, "Shalltear, elaborate. Is anyone hurt? Should I come to your location?"

Shalltear immediately answered in a panic, "N-no! Everything is fine! There is no need to come here!"

This seemed suspicious more than anything, Ainz didn't think she would lie to him, but he still wasn't sure about that just yet.

"Shalltear. I will ask again. Should I come to your location?"

Her reply was even more panicked now, "N-no! Absolutely not! Everything is fine, neither of them has a scratch on them, we just had a little conversation, that's all. Please do not come down here!"

This pleading reply only made Ainz more suspicious, and he made ready to create a Gate, "Where are you, Shalltear?"

After a moment there was a reluctant answer, "W-we are all in the women's section of the Roman bath, my lord."

'Oh.'

"… I see. When they are done please have Cixous contact me, I will provide them a Gate. Until then I ask that you apologize for any discomfort you may have caused either of them. That will be all."

There was no protest from Shalltear, who just gave one final small apology and hung up the line.

Ainz took his skull into his hands and sighed again, 'Talk about a fuckup.'

Neia found it surprisingly easy to stay scared of what now looked like a little girl being reprimanded by her dad, complete with nervous fidgeting and muttered apologies. But she no longer felt like she was about to be eaten and/or tortured to death, so that was something.

About halfway through the conversation Shalltear had turned her back to them and moved a small distance away, so Neia dared to sneak a glance back towards Cixous. She just gave an awkward smile and a little wave, to which Neia gave a little wave of her own before turning back around.

After a couple seconds Shalltear seemed to end the connection and turned back around to face them, her hand gently caressing her forehead for a moment before looking Neia in the eyes, "I don't know how and I don't know why, but I made a mistake, and for that I have to apologize. If you are truly a servant of the Supreme Beings then I have no business threatening you as I did." She really didn't seem happy about saying that, not at all.

She then pointed up to Cixous and continues, "That goes for you as well, you were just doing what Lord Ainz ordered you to do, I am sorry for impeding that."

Neia was shocked by this, she never expected such a strong, seemingly bloodthirsty, creature to just turn on a dime and start apologizing.

But she wasn't about to complain.

"I-It's okay, Lady Shalltear, I am sorry for any confusion that has come about due to my presence…" Neia then remembered Cixous' little bit of advice and quickly added, "All I wish is to serve His Majesty to the best of my ability."

Shalltear looked a bit confused at that, "His Majesty? What are you talking about?"

Neia blinked a couple times, not sure what to say.

Cixous chimed in, "I believe she is referring to Lord Ainz, Lady Shalltear."

A wave of realization dawned on her face and she simply said, "Oh."

Neia then had a private epiphany, 'I think that this one might not be His Majesty's brightest…'

After a second Shalltear spoke again, "Well, that's good at least. I'm sure he has some reason for keeping you around…"

Then something seemed to click for Shalltear, and her expression once more changed in an instant, this time dropping into one of barely restrained rage, "Now, you listen to me very closely. You are going to do exactly what Lord Ainz tells you to do, and that is it. Anything more and you will regret it. Do you understand me?"

Neia had no idea where this was coming from, and she really didn't understand at all, but for some reason she felt that it was definitely within her best interest to play along with the mentally unstable killing machine, "Y-yes, of course, Lady Shalltear."

Shalltear gave her one last death glare before stepping out of the bath and marching out of sight with a prissy huff and clenched fists, she then reappeared a couple seconds later and shouted, "Oh, and message Lord Ainz when you are done in there, he wants to see you!"

With that, Shalltear disappeared through the archway

Neia needed a second after that.

She looked back towards Cixous, and then to the door to the hall where Shalltear disappeared, and then back to Cixous once more.

'How are these two part of the same organization? How am I still alive? Why…'

Cixous spoke in her usual gentle voice, "Neia, are you alright?"

Neia looked down at her body, and saw that indeed there wasn't a scratch on her, "I am fine, thank you Cixous. But I think we should go…"

She really was fine, at least physically, and the Sorcerer King wanted to see her, there was no reason to keep him waiting, especially when that thing might still be skulking around her current location. Going to see the Sorcerer King sounded like a marvelous idea.

Cixous merely nodded in agreement before picking up Neia's freshly cleaned and dried clothes, Neia was going to ask how she dried them but she caught a glimpse of a small wand near the washing station and chose not to question it.

Neia stepped out of the bath and dried herself off with the towel she brought in, before wrapping it back around her body, securing it tightly, and gratefully taking her freshly laundered clothing from Cixous.

From there it was just a short walk to the changing room, thankfully Shalltear wasn't there. Neia quickly got dressed and gave herself a brief look in the mirror before heading back out into the hall where Cixous was patiently waiting.

The atmosphere was still a little awkward, but Cixous still managed a small smile before asking, "Are you ready, Neia?"

Neia gave a curt nod in reply, and Cixous pulled out the scroll the Sorcerer King had given her the night before, "Lord Ainz, we are ready to see you now. We are located in front of the women's changing room," there was a short pause, "Thank you, my lord." Cixous then cut the connection.

A few moments later a Gate appeared, Cixous gave Neia a quick nod before stepping through.

Neia had already used these things a couple times, and she felt an overwhelming desire to get as far away from the current area as quickly as possible…

She stepped through without a second of hesitation.

AN: It took me a little while to get this one out, I've had a very busy week, but I'm pretty happy with how it turned out. I hope you guys liked this one, there wasn't really any interaction between Neia and Ainz this time but I hope that's not too much of a problem, trust me when I say there will be plenty of that to come. As is tradition, please don't hold back on any criticism, the more I get the better my writing will be, and the more you will probably enjoy it, so it's a win-win. Well, that's about it, till next time.