He was afraid… so very afraid of turning around and facing Tom. He was afraid that it would break him. He knew that there was too much below deck not to shatter his carefully created mask when it would all come out. Breaking was hard but recovery was almost impossible and that was something he just couldn't afford.
He needed to act smart and keep his feelings under wraps. He knew Tom expected that from him and that's why he'd play along. but his traitorous heart absolutely refused to calm down. He didn't have the fortitude to face Tom after everything that had happened. He was certain that one look at him would be enough to make him crumble.
No… He was not that weak… He couldn't be that weak…
Taking a silent breath, he turned around and came face to face with Tom, who looked as immaculate as ever. His dark hair had somehow grown longer and matched perfectly with the dark black robes that he wore. His eyes, however, were crimson rather than brown and they shone with something, Harry couldn't quite place.
But he'd been right… He'd been so right because as soon as he set his eyes on Tom, because everything and everyone just became irrelevant. The only person he could think about, the only person that he could see was Tom…It was like the world around him turned black and white and Tom was the only thing he could see in colour.
Tom's face was impassive, but his eyes were saying something that Harry was incapable of reading. His heart jackhammered in his chest, threatening to burst out as he made his way around the couch and towards where Tom stood.
He didn't trust his voice. He knew it would betray him. So, he did what he could do.
His knees gave way on their own and he came crashing down in front of Tom. He bowed his head until his lips were level with Tom's foot clad in a leather steel tipped boot and then slowly, reverently, he pressed a kiss to the polished leather. He knew it was the only part of Tom, he could kiss right now.
He kept his lips there for as long as he could before pulling them away but even then, he made no move to straighten up. His heart was beating so loud, he wondered if Tom could hear it. He wondered if Tom knew how much pain he'd been through…how much he'd suffered…
"Harry…"
He felt his world turn upside down at the sound of his name coming from Tom's lips. How long had he yearned to hear this? He'd lost all hope that he would ever hear Tom call him by his name again. And even though, right now, Tom's voice was devoid of all emotions, it was enough for him.
He raised his head but kept his gaze lowered. He bit back a sigh of relief as he felt Tom's fingers card through his hair. No words could describe the joy that was brought on by such a simple touch. There was no substitute for the buoyant light that filled up his dark insides and made him feel like he was truly alive again.
He knew Tom was waiting for him to speak so he summoned all his strength and spoke,
"My Lord, please forgive my Godfather for his imprudence. He…He does not understand the favur you have bestowed upon him by freeing him from Azkaban…"
Sirius cut him off in a loud voice,
"I did not ask him for this."
Harry felt his insides squirm with unease at the disrespect in Sirius's voice. Tom had freed him from Azkaban, the least he could do was show a little respect. Before he could continue, Tom spoke,
"It seems your Godfather does not appreciate his freedom."
Harry shook his head violently at that,
"No…My Lord…That is not the case…He simply does not belong here and that is why I request that you allow him to leave."
Tom tsked,
"As much as I am pleased with your loyalty, Harry, I simply cannot allow that. Your Godfather must learn to belong here otherwise he will find himself at the mercy of my ire."
Harry closed his eyes as he felt Tom tug gently on his hair,
"Your Godson has gone to great lengths to free you, Black. I suggest you learn to show some gratitude…"
Tom paused and Harry silently prayed that he wouldn't ask him to answer that question again because he didn't know the answer…Maybe he did know the answer but he couldn't speak it out loud.
"As for you, Harry… You have proven your loyalty to me and therefore, I wish to make an announcement today."
Harry already knew what the announcement was. Tom's fingers moved away from his hair and he felt his hands on his shoulders,
"On your feet, Harry."
Harry rose up to his feet but made sure to keep his gaze lowered as Tom spoke,
"I have decided to allow Harry into my inner circle… I believe he has earned his spot there. If anyone in this vicinity has any objections regrading my decision, let them be known now."
No one spoke because Harry knew as well as everyone else that whoever voiced their objections would probably be tortured into oblivion. And he doubted that anyone wanted that. Tom spoke,
"Excellent… Now that you have accepted Harry into your ranks, I expect that none of you will hold any animosity against him. He is to be treated as an equal and he will command the same respect from my outer level death eaters as any of you."
Tom paused and Harry felt a surge of electricity shoot through his entire system as Tom took his wrist and spoke,
"Some of you may be wondering that he has not even been marked. I have decided not to mark him at the moment because it would affect my plans regarding him. He will be marked when those plans have been realized."
Tom squeezed his wrist gently and Harry felt him draw closer to him…so close that he could feel his breath against his cheek,
"You belong to me, Harry… You should never forget that."