Disclaimer: Don't own Kimi ni Todoke, nor any of it's characters.
Rating: M
A series of one-shots, regarding the steps taken by Sawako and Shouta in their relationship- this time, continuing the mature stuff.
Morning
Oh, so that's why...
On her phone, text messages from Ayane and Chizu told her the answer to her previous questions: why did- mmh, why did her chest feel so sensitive when it's touched? She had never given this a thought before, because she'd only ever touched herself there when washing herself, and always delicately... but now, lately, Shouta's gradual t-touches on her chest had been getting strange, sensitive sensations from her...
She'd wondered if that was normal... and apparently it was...
Ayane - "That's how it is, Sawako. Nerves in girls' chests are more concentrated when they're smaller, and more spread-out when bigger, so I'm not surprised yours are more 'sensitive'."
Chizu - "Mmh... I think that means I'm less sensitive than Sawako, but more sensitive than you, Ayane."
Ayane - "Probably, but even the least sensitive can still feel good. Oh, and Sawako, as to your other question- that's a trick of the brain. How we feel touching ourselves, and how we feel having someone else touch us, is different that way. No matter where it happens."
Chizu - "Yeah, yeah, that stuff! Anyway, keep up the good work!"
"Ayane - "That too. And remember, it's okay to explore this step with Shouta, Sawako, just like all the others; you guys are married after all. Do so at your own pace, like always. We'll say that as many times as you need us to. We'll talk to you later though, as we've got plans today."
They really were the best friends she could ever ask for- even now, at times she felt like she hadn't done anything special enough to deserve them. But... that's okay too: they want to stay friends with her and Shouta, and she wanted that too, and so that's how things will stay, for which she's grateful beyond words!
S-Still, back to this matter...
Even though a small part of her wasn't sure what Chizu meant by 'that stuff' - as far as what it was called - Sawako could feel her face reddening, even without imagining what might happen next. She still recalled from that first time how- how one step involved touching guys on their chest, with or without a shirt... and then, the same for would happen next with the- the g-girl's chest, also with or without a shirt...
She'd gotten to do so with Shouta, including under his shirt after the second time, but he only got to do so over her shirt... a-and only somewhat too, mostly overtime.
"It's- it's not fair to him" Sawako thought, though her face was burning. "He... he might be feeling frustrated inside, or maybe sad."
Also, he probably knows the things Ayane and Chizu have been teaching her, at least somewhat, yet she wasn't ready for them all. The way he loved her means that he always treasured her feelings - earnestly so, even when she always cared about his more than her own - and yet his more selfish side must want to- to disregard this.
And sometimes... sometimes he does act without thinking, or so he's said, even if- if she has trouble recognizing what actions are such...
So... if she takes too long, he might be tempted to do something he'd regret? And then they both might misunderstand, and... and maybe hurt each other's feelings?
Ahh!? AHHHH!?
She mustn't let that happen, if she can help it!
Several days later
Nighttime
Mmh... this was really something...
Laying on both their sides together, Shouta continued to kiss her, as he'd been doing for awhile- Sawako did her best to return them, if still a little hesitant and taking her time. In her mind though, she couldn't help but think that i-it'd worked... earlier, when she'd had trouble asking with words if they could kiss and- and do 'more', instead she had leaned closer, and closed her eyes/opened her lips a little...
Shouta had understood her, and began things by kissing her after a little.
It made her feel happy... if she can't say the words, she can still make him understand with her actions. Just like Chizu had told her she could do... though she wondered how much experience Chizu had with this...
Her thought was driven away when Shouta did this really soft lick over her lips- a breathy squeak escaped her mouth.
That- t-that felt good...
Still, with a jolt Sawako remembered the actual plan she had- Shouta seemed to slow for a moment when she paused, but after that just kept going. Not noticing this, she closed her eyes, her lips moving almost by instinct but... but most of her attention was on what she's trying to do. It took an effort, but eventually she got her hand to move, and eventually brush over Shouta's hand, though he just continued to kiss her. When she lightly grasped his hand and started pulling, he seemed surprised but didn't resist... it's okay; this is just like the last time she moved his hand.
S-She can do this...!
Slowly, carefully, she brought his hand down closer to her stomach... then she shifted, nervous, before her other hand slowly adjusted her nightshirt to create more room. By this point, her heart was beating really fast, yet the way Shouta kissed her helped her stay calm, and she remembered her friends' words about how this is okay, that she's allowed to explore this.
After a little, Sawako slowly pulled Shouta's hand up, underneath her shirt...
He seemed to feel this, but he didn't react much; just continued to kiss her.
Sawako nearly jolted, opening her eyes a little- did he... was he misunderstanding her action? Her face heated up as she started to panic, thinking she'd done something wrong or he didn't want to, u-until she realized she hadn't pulled his hand up high enough: his hand was only touching just above her stomach.
And he'd touched her there before...
It was a wonder that she didn't start shaking, or squirm, but she closed her eyes again and (with an effort) pulled his hand up more, before she could lose her nerve. As soon as his fingers touched the upper part of her ribs, then he just stopped... Shouta slowly pulled away from their kiss, but only an inch, and she felt his warm breath...
He- he was probably looking at her, but she... she wasn't sure she could open her eyes yet...!
For awhile, they stayed like that, just catching their breath and- oh? Shouta's hand (inside her shirt) began to move a little... actually, it was just his fingers, which seemed to be exploring in little circles. Sawako still felt nervous, but slightly less so when she realized this; just like her, he's realizing that she'd given him permission, and was trying to adjust to this.
He is allowed to, just as she is; Sawako kept thoroughly reminding herself of that!
It took some time, but Shouta's fingers stopped rubbing along her ribs, and poked more at the fabric of her bra.
Heart beating faster, she focused on the sensations of his hands rubbing h-her chest from before, when he'd done so over her clothes. This should be the same, and just a little bit stronger... but will still feel good, or she hoped...
Shouta chose to kiss her again, which briefly surprised her (but she slowly began returning it after that)-
-and his hand moved again.
Instead of the light, odd-yet-good sensations of the past times, the sensations she felt were far more intense, warm, and physical! Sawako gasped at them, this stalling her kisses entirely, not that Shouta seemed to mind- the warm sensations continued from her chest, never once ceasing in intensity!
W-what's going on!?
It was never this strong before! Not when he just brushed his fingers over her clothes!
However, even as she instinctively reacted to the sensations, her eyes opened as the reality began to sink in. Rather than brushing his hand over her bra, as she thought was next, Shouta had- had slipped his hand underneath the fabric instead... a-and was touching her chest directly!
Ahh!? Ahhhh!?
T-T-That hadn't been what she meant he should do!
Just as she had this feeling, Shouta's fingers brushed against her nipple-
-and an instinctive sound escaped her mouth, somewhere between a gasp and a squeak.
Her entire body heated up, caught somewhere between the sensations and the sheer panic from realizing what just happened! Her heart was physically beating against her ribcage, and she was near-frozen with shock, not knowing what to do beyond instinctively reacting!
It didn't help either, that she didn't know if she wanted him to stop or not!
Shouta's fingers continued their little rubs, then he moved a bit, and lightly cupped her breast in his hand. The sensations of that caused her to vocally squirm (i-in a good way), and her eyes half-closed as the sensations flowed through her body... it still felt a bit odd, but r-really... good, more than ever before.
But she... she has to tell him that...
Mmh...
...
For what seemed like the longest time, Shouta kept touching her chest, and even added his other hand at some point... eventually, she was laying more on her back, with Shouta leaning over from her right side. She- she hadn't returned too many of Shouta's affections, only doing what simple instinct and experience told her to do, but he... he seemed to think that because she wanted this, her behavior was just her being nervous-but-willing (a-and that's kinda right), so he kept going.
It was... odd though, that he didn't ask how she was doing, during any part.
Because of the sensations, she had also um, 'forgotten' to tell Shouta that he misunderstood what he should've done. Even though he'd touched her chest before over her clothes, having it directly stimulated like this was more than she could've prepared for... and right now, Sawako a-almost didn't want it to stop...
But thankfully, Shouta's next actions broke her out of this state.
After a pause, his hands moved off her chest and down her body- her initial reaction was confusion, wondering why he stopped so suddenly, and m-maybe a brief little bit of want (since it felt good). Then however, what she'd forgotten - along with the realization that his hands were grasping her shirt - slowly hit her...
Her eyes snapped open, breathing heavily, and Sawako looked up in an instant.
Shouta was breathing heavily, cheeks redder with his expression half that of enjoyment, but now more conflicted as he looked down at something. His hands were grasping her shirt fabric... he moved it back-and-forth in place for a time, but uncertain about it...
Wait, is he... i-i-is he thinking about doing something more than this!?
Despite not having that answer, her mind (tried to) imagined it: herself and Shouta, with him taking her shirt off (if while censored). Her face heated up to such a degree that it almost literally felt like she's burning up, and her mental self had to profusely shake this off!
"S-S- Stop!"
Shocked by her sudden cry, Shouta let go of her shirt and jumped back a bit, almost panting. When Sawako leaned up on her hands, she was quick to cover her chest (despite still wearing her clothes) - she was panting, but full of an urge to set things straight before anything else happens!
"S-Sawako?" Shouta breathed, feeling a lot, including worry and confusion. "What are you-?"
"Please!"
He stopped- her single word had been a bit forceful - s-sorta - which she felt bad about, but it was necessary!
She kept telling herself that as she shook from nervousness. "I... I need to say some things, Shouta-kun" Sawako said, eyes half-closing as she gulped. "I- I'm asking you not to say anything until I'm... I'm done. I-It's important!"
Part of her thought she'd been too demanding, but despite this, she held fast to her words as Shouta reacted. He still seemed worried, confused, a-and maybe 'pleased' by what they were doing just b-before... but then he closed his mouth and nodded, a little intent as he looked at her.
She gulped a little...
"I..."
A slight reaction from him, but he didn't look away.
Sawako held her hands closer to her chest. "I... when I moved your hands before, I meant for you to... to move over my b-bra" she said with an effort - even as Shouta jolted, she closed her eyes and pressed on. "I didn't mean for you to do... w-what you did. But even still, I... I r-really did like it and... and... and I don't think I'd mind if you did that again, s-some other night!"
Having finished, it was like a weight off her shoulders, even though she still felt really embarrassed and her face had turned really red, but- but she'd said what she meant to!
When awhile passed though and Shouta didn't reply, she started to get confused and worried, until she realized:
"I- I'm done now" she quickly added, in a very small voice.
Shouta shifted then, and his hand came up to her cheek, which she moved against in surprise.
"I'm sorry, Sawako" he whispered to her, full of regret; she slowly felt confused. "When you moved my hand... I just felt surprised, along with wondering that you were brave enough to do that. Mmh, but you were always so brave. Because of this, I- I forgot to ask what you meant exactly. So... I just assumed anything was okay there, as long as it was slow, and so I moved without thinking."
Oh... s-so that's why he hadn't asked how she was doing, before...?
"Mmh. If only I wasn't so selfish-!"
"You weren't selfish, Shouta-kun" Sawako said quickly, almost by instinct and surprising him - she felt more embarrassed, but she didn't fidget (much). "You... you thought I was okay with things. If- if I misunderstood too, and you didn't say anything, I might have... done the same kinds of things. E-Eventually. I-I guess."
Shouta seemed to slump in relief, then next thing she knew, he was hugging her- she squeaked, but didn't really mind the situation despite this.
"I still want to make up for it, Sawako" he whispered to her, leaving her wondering a bit. "But I do have one question."
"Ah, yes?"
"Why didn't you tell me I misunderstood? I mean... e-earlier."
Her face heated up again. "I- I got distracted... it- it was more intense than I was expecting" Sawako breathed, a bit more shaky. "But... when I saw you grasping my shirt... I wanted to tell you before you uh, d-did anything else!"
He seemed to jolt, though she was confused about why, until:
"So you... mmh. When you said 'some other night', Sawako, did you mean soon? O-Or maybe much later?"
She yelped, embarrassed and surprised by the questions... Shouta still held her for awhile, and it comforted her, but she still squirmed somewhat...
"I-I don't know yet, Shouta-kun."
"Okay. And do you... still want me to continue tonight? I-I mean... the stuff we were doing before t-this."
"M...mmh-hmm. A-A little."
She really couldn't have been more embarrassed that night... but she could see that Shouta was embarrassed too, which helped a lot. Still, despite her saying it's okay, he seemed to continue feeling bad for what had happened - s-she hoped that later, she could help with that perception more, as she didn't know what words to say for that.
But more than anything, she hopes they can continue doing their best!
And um also, it seems Ayane and Chizu had been right; because of her size, she was a bit... sensitive.
And so the mature section of their moments (properly) begins. It was a bit tricky thinking how Sawako would feel in this scenario - and such situations in general - but I figured that as long as I didn't lean too heavily into it, Sawako getting caught up in/being distracted by the first-time "sensations" wouldn't be too much of a stretch. Though it would help that it's a natural reaction for many XD
Regardless, they've taken a big step ahead of the curve... by accident, but still hehe.
Side note: the word count per chapter of this fic is, overall, going to be a fair bit bigger than the first fic - even with thirteen chapters rather than eight - though some will still be a bit on the shorter side. And on a more serious note, I hope this fic helps lift the spirits of those who, as of this writing, are stuck at home during this coronavirus issue.