Three: Shouko Nishimiya

Before Tomoko Kuroki in university, there was Shouko Nishimiya in high school. He remembers her clearly, a fair young lady with a petite build, brown eyes and chest-length, dusty pinkish brown wavy hair with bangs which reached the bridge of her nose. She was the picture of innocence, the maiden in the cute dress, the pinnacle of femininity and despite what happened in middle school, he took the risk. And it paid off. She liked him as well. And he had never been happier.

But he was young. He was stupid. Mistakes were bound to happen. He didn't have any friends to talk to, didn't really have anyone to confide. He thought he didn't need them. To an extent it was true. But humans are social animals. You can be a loner, but you can't be alone and survive in this world. Back then he didn't know. He also didn't know much about women. Being in a relationship, dating, the physical aspects of intimacy, he knew next to nothing and it slowly became a problem.

He thought he had time. He thought he would figure it out. There he made the next mistake. He was thinking all about himself. He didn't take her feelings into account. Unlike him, Shouko was a likeable person. She had friends in her own school. She also talked to her younger sister. They had a lot of things to say and none of them were helpful.

Two weeks into their relationship and he hadn't found the courage to hold her hand. They didn't share a kiss, though he had thought about it a lot. The idea of kissing her wasn't unappealing. He liked her, he really did, but unlike most teenagers, he didn't have dirty, perverted, sexual fantasies which involved her in a plethora of sexual situations.

There was something wrong with him. He liked her, didn't he, he wondered. He was attracted to her. Yes, he was. Then what was the problem. He should be able to kiss her. He should be able to hold her hand. But he thought about what happened in middle school. He cursed Orimoto, the woman who had ruined him. He knew it wasn't true. He knew it wasn't her fault. But it was easier than blaming himself. It was better than questioning his own manhood.

Shouko Nishimiya liked him. Despite all his shortcomings, his rotten dead fish eyes, the fact that they went to different high schools and couldn't really spend all that time together, she still managed to like him. But there was a part of him which was now beginning to consider whether what he felt for her was actually love. It had to be or else there could only be heartbreak. He hated himself for doing this, but he had to come to terms with the truth.

He liked her because she needed him. He liked her because no one else would. She was beautiful, she was cute. But she was also disabled, clinically deaf, unable to hear anything or communicate with anyone without the use of sign language. She wore a hearing aid in one of her ears, but not the other. There was a story there, a tragic one, he could tell. He could spot a victim of bullying from a mile away and it broke his heart, made him angry to think someone had hurt her, but he knew the cruelties of the world.

He wanted to protect her, save her, be her knight in shining armour. However he knew, he wasn't suitable for the role. Komachi often told him he was old fashioned, chivalrous and women necessarily didn't like those values in men anymore. He should have listened to his little sister. She knew what she was talking about. But he hadn't told her about Shouko. He hadn't told anyone about her. And that was another mistake to add to the long list of his youth.

They were in the park, under the shade of a tree, having a picnic. This was where they first met. She was feeding bread to the fishes from the bridge and completely unaware of her surroundings. He was on his bicycle, barreling down. He rang the bell, but she didn't hear a thing. But he didn't know she was deaf back when he first met her. When she didn't move out of the way, he hit the brakes and rightfully tumbled over, falling from the bicycle, landing before her feet, his face brushing the fabric of her dress. That's when she realized he was there and from the looks of it, she thought he was trying to look up her dress. He wasn't, but he did catch a small peek. Both of them blushed.

Unlike most women, she didn't really create too much of a fuss. It was an accident and there was nothing much more to it. But he felt guilty for some reason, especially when he realized she was deaf and how close he had come to hit her with his bicycle, so he asked her whether there was something he could do. He felt like an idiot when he expected her to reply. He didn't know sign language back then. He didn't know what he was thinking. But he was quick to pick up cues and when she handed him a piece of bread, he knew what to do. And thus began their friendship, which evolved into what he thought was love and now he was here in the same park having a picnic.

While he was eating a sandwich, he stared at her breasts with heavy thoughts which weren't the least bit licentious. Shouko Nishimiya was aware of his gaze, but she was unaware of his thoughts. Her friends at school and her little sister had told her to be wary of men, but so far he hadn't done anything to cause an alarm. When he thought she wasn't looking, he would sneak a peek, look at her face, her breasts, her hips, her legs and then pretend he was busy with something else. But he would blush and she would know he had been looking, and so far it had been her little secret, not telling him that she knew he liked looking at her body.

She didn't seem to mind him looking. In fact, she liked the attention. It made her feel more like a grown woman, than a useless young girl. But over the past couple of weeks, since they had started dating, he had done nothing else but look and there was a part of her which was growing uncertain. Did he like her, did he saw her as a woman or as a disabled person, was he going to try anything, was she going to like it, such questions troubled her and she couldn't put her mind to ease.

This picnic was her idea and he went along with it, because she had the feeling he couldn't say no to her. But she didn't want to take advantage of it. What she felt for him was love, she was certain, but she was unsure whether he felt the same way. Sure, he liked her, there was no doubt about that. But was there a physical attraction, she was fairly certain there was. But could he see them together, having sex, sometime in the future. That, she really didn't know. But she had made plans to find out, during the course of this little picnic. However, she was unsure how to go about it. At the end, she went for the direct approach. Or at least that's what she thought.

"Do you like this dress?" Shouko asked. He had taken the extra effort to learn sign language. It wasn't after he confessed his feelings to her. No, it began after the first few days into their friendship. He had surprised her. She had been grateful. Perhaps it was the first time she fell a little bit in love with him. Now she was risking it all because she wanted more from their relationship.

"I like it." He replied. She had seen him avert his eyes quickly, thinking this was her way of rebuking him for staring at her breasts. God, he was such a creep. But she should know that about him already. However he was the one in fault, so he tried to remedy the situation. Not being good with situations like these, he went for the easiest way out and tried for a compliment. "It looks really cute."

"It makes my breasts look bigger."

"What!?"

Hachiman Hikigaya said it out loud. Perhaps he had made a mistake. He wasn't an expert in sign language. But he was pretty sure, she just said, what she just said. But were they really having this conversation. He was so confused. No, that wasn't it. He was terrified. He was a blushing mess. Shouko Nishimiya had just talked to him about her breasts. This really wasn't happening. No, he must be dreaming. Yes, that must be the case. He had been trying so hard to think of her in pervy, hyper sexualized situations and now he was finally successful because of her own, bold efforts. And it felt wrong. What was wrong with him, he really didn't know.

"You have been staring at my breasts-"

He held up a hand in surrender. "Look if this is your way of teaching me a lesson, well mission accomplished. I won't look at your breasts."

Shouko Nishimiya shook her head. Now she was blushing too. Why was this so difficult, she wondered. Yet, she had trouble finding the words to communicate her real feelings. "I don't mind you looking." Her hands shook and she thought her next words through real carefully. "I was wondering if you would like something else."

Hachiman raised an eyebrow. "Like what?"

Shouko Nishimiya had survived through so much, she had told him so little about her past hardships. But now at this small, miniscule moment which wouldn't even be of much importance in the future, she truly felt afraid. She was worried. She was filled with self doubt and negative thoughts. She wondered whether he would look at her differently from now on. She was also excited, filled with thrill, wondering what he would think. But unlike him, she didn't waste a moment of her own time.

Hachiman watched as she took hold of his hand and placed them on her breast. He was surprised, he was alarmed. He questioned his own sanity for letting her go through with this. But all those stray, unimportant thoughts left his mind as he felt them weigh on his palm. Involuntarily, almost subconsciously, he gave a small squeeze and he saw her looking away, trying to hide the look on her face, even though his ears had heard a moan escape her lips.

The thin fabric of her light summer dress proved to be a disadvantage as he could feel the outlines of her brassiere cups. He could feel her nipples pebble and he didn't need to know what that meant. Neither was he surprised with how she adjusted herself, rubbed her legs together and looked down, unable to meet his eyes, something which he didn't like. But then he realized, she was preoccupied with something else entirely. Her brown eyes were looking at the bulge in his pants and he felt self conscious. Like he was touching her, she also reached out and tried to touch him.

But he was a coward and he acted selfishly and he gave her breasts a rough squeeze to distract her. She cried out, more out of surprise than in pain, but it stopped her from touching him, which surely would have led to a disaster. Doing such things in a picnic at a park of all places was not how he would have liked it, but it was good to know there was nothing wrong with him and that he saw her as a woman, someone he was sexually attracted to and would have liked to continue such activities in the confines of a much more private setting like a bedroom or a love hotel.

As he was smiling, Shouko Nishimiya hit him lightly with one arm. The other one was being used to shield her breasts from his view. He thought she would call him a pervert, a beast who took liberties with women, someone who didn't know how to be gentle, but she said none of those things.

All she did was smile.

A/N: It's been a while since I wrote and so I wrote this because a guest suggested it and also because I like writing Shouko Nishimiya. I don't think it's a lemon, but it still matches the tone of the story. Tell me what you think. Here are the options for the next chapter:

Option 1: Saki Kawasaki – Oregairu

Option 2: Lucy Heartfilia – Fairy Tail.

Option 3: Tohka Yatogami – Date A Live.

Option 4: Hinata Hyuga – Naruto

Option 5: Tsunade - Naruto

Option 6: Mikasa Ackerman – Attack on Titan.

Please pick any of the above options.

Hope everyone enjoyed reading this chapter.

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Won't betray your dreams.