Author's Note: Heeeeey everyone! Guess who's not dead! This summer ended up being way more chaotic than expected, but I'm super excited to hopefully be back to writing a bit more regularly now that things have calmed down a bit! I've been watching season 11 and there was a scene that really felt like it needed some resolution, so this was born! (When) You Weren't There takes place between episodes 14 and 15 so if you haven't watched these episodes yet, be warned that there are a few spoilers! Anyway, I hope that you enjoy this oneshot featuring the Smith Siblings!
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Footsteps echoed softly.
First to the left, then the right. Repeat.
Nya watched her brother quietly wander the halls of the monastery. It had been several hours since… Since Zane had been hit by Ashpeera's spell and… ceased to exist…
The aftermath had been devastating. No one felt like talking, felt like doing anything, too caught up in shocked grief. It was too reminiscent of Cole's fall, and far, far too soon. Why did tragedy always strike at the worst possible moment? She'd never get used to this feeling. No matter how many times they lost someone.
The master of water glanced at the clock on a nearby wall. It was late. The others were probably already in bed (Pixal had retired to her room hours ago), and she really ought to consider joining them soon, but there was something she needed to do first.
"Kai?" She called. He stopped, glancing over at her.
"Y-yeah?"
"We need to talk." Nya stated firmly, grabbing Kai's arm and leading him toward her room.
"We just lost Zane, sis. This had better be important." He replied, eyes red and puffy. It was obvious that the day's events had hit him hard, but Nya was dead set on having this conversation now. Someone had to do damage control before things got even worse.
"Oh, it is.." She dragged him inside. Seating herself on the bed, she eyed him expectantly. He couldn't ignore the look on her face.
"What's eating you?" The master of fire asked quietly, not sure he wanted to know what else might be bothering her. He sat next to her, waiting for a response. Nya glanced away, picking at her bedspread as she chose her words.
"I think…" She took a breath, "I think you need to apologize to Lloyd. For what happened earlier."
"Apologize?" He repeated. The former samurai nodded.
"Yes. Apologize. Maybe you think that coming back at the last possible moment counts, but it doesn't. The way you acted? The things you said? They hurt Lloyd. A lot more than you realize. And while he's too nice to say it to your face, I'm not."
"I… I was being a little insensitive…" Admitted Kai, sheepishly. His behavior definitely wasn't something to be proud of.
"A little?!" Nya hissed, a bit louder than intended, "What the heck, Kai?! Have you already forgotten that Lloyd lost his own elemental powers not that long ago? That he had to deal with his maniac of a father trying to take over the city while grieving the loss of his family all at the same time?!"
"I-"
"Do you have any idea how horrible that was for him?And then you, his brother, come along and basically tell him his struggles weren't justified!" He shrank back as she continued, realizing just how badly he'd messed up.
"Oh gosh… I feel like such a jerk now… I didn't mean for it to come out like that…" Kai said, feeling even worse than before, "I just… I felt so useless and frustrated and I guess I didn't…" She sighed.
"That's just it. You don't get it… none of you do!"
"I… what?" He questioned, a bit surprised by the outburst.
"It's so easy for you to forget that Lloyd went through living hell while you were off gallivanting about with dragons, for you to say or do something stupid and ignorant, and you wanna know why? You. Weren't. There." Her words felt like a physical punch. Kai reeled backwards, nearly falling off of his sister's bed. She turned away, bitterly.
"You weren't there when Lloyd woke up without powers, or when he refused to eat for days on end… or when he cried himself to sleep every night blaming himself for getting you killed, or when… When everyone else got captured?" He could hear her voice beginning to break.
"You weren't there, and I was so, so scared a-and everything was so bro-oken - I didn't know what to do…. we needed you, and you w-were gone and… And then we almost lost you again, and…" Nya's voice grew quieter, resigned. This wasn't just about Lloyd anymore. And the master of fire was beginning to wonder if it ever had been. She chocked out a sob.
"And I-I know it's not fair to blame you for that b-because it wasn't your fault you were stuck i-in another realm, but I still…. It hurts and I can't…."
"Oh, Nya… I'm so sorry… why didn't you tell me…." He whispered, edging over to her. The girl's crying turned to hiccups as she allowed Kai to scoop her up into a tight hug. He rubbed comforting circles on her back, attempting to calm her down enough to get a coherent response out of her.
"I was so relieved to h-have you back again, you know?" She whispered, beginning to feel better now that she'd gotten all the negative feelings that had been plaguing her for the past 6 months off her chest, "I-I couldn't lay that on you, not when…"
"Nya… Nya, look at me…" Kai begged. Nya shifted towards him, face streaked with tears. He grabbed the box of tissues she kept on her bedside table and handed them to her. She gratefully accepted them.
"I don't care how idiotic I'm acting. You can always come to me when something's bothering you. You know that…"
"I do." The master of water agreed with a watery smile.
"Good. Because you shouldn't have to feel like you're going through this stuff alone – you aren't, and you never will be. I promise." He replied, giving her nose a tweak. She leaned against him, comforted by his words.
"Thanks. I really needed that right now."
"No problem, sis. I'm your brother. It's what I'm here for. And you're right... Lloyd deserves an apology. I'll make sure I talk to him as soon as I can." Kai determined.
"Yeah, I… I think that's a good idea… maybe it'll help soften the blow to know that you understand… after what happened today? He's gonna need some encouragement…" His sister stated, knowingly.
"Things are definitely gonna be rough around here for awhile…" He said, nodding in agreement. Suddenly they were interrupted by the sound of someone screaming down the hall. Pixal.
"We'd better go check on her." Nya commented as she pushed herself up from the mattress. Kai followed her to the door, steeling himself for yet another difficult conversation. They were a family… They'd get through this…. Right?
/k
Thank you, beloved readers, for sticking with me in all the craziness! Your endless support has meant a lot to me. I hope you enjoyed reading this! Have a fantastic summer and don't hesitate to drop a review if you have feedback or suggestions!
~GwenBrightly
