Obligatory Beach Episode!
Part 1: Let's take a vacation!
Ainz raised his hand up to his forehead to cast much needed shade over his eyes. While the Sun's rays could not damage what he technically didn't have, the brightness was still quite the abrupt change from the 3rd Floor's dank crypt and his vision needed a moment to adjust.
"Well, I'll be damned."
Words alone were not enough to express the admiration he felt for his surroundings. This wasn't a sight he thought he'd find in this new world and, frankly, it was a sight he knew full well he never would have seen back in his old one.
A single step forward and Ainz felt the ground sink ever so slightly from the weight of his sandal. Smiling, though his fleshless face couldn't show it, he bent downward and took up a scoop of the earth, allowing the many grains to slip seamlessly through his boney hand.
Sand. Genuine sand. Glittering like diamonds all across the shore.
And indeed a shore it was. The light breeze caught some of the grains he'd released and pulled them towards the water, bluer than anything he'd ever seen and ebbing and flowing in a consistent rhythm, like it could lull one to sleep.
Off in the distance, Ainz could even swear he was hearing the squawks of seagulls. This truly was about as picture perfect to a true beach as one could imagine and if his curious eyes weren't on the lookout for flaws in the effects, he'd probably never be able to tell the difference if he didn't already know the truth.
The water became darker the deeper down one would look but there was something poking out just before the view hit total blackness. Jagged and rocky, it appeared that there was a large underwater mountain sitting beneath the waves. If you strained your eyes enough, you might perhaps see the faint glow of red lines oozing out from two holes in the mountain's side and think the structure to be a volcano. While not quite that dangerous, the shape underneath was nothing for those unfortunate enough to not be welcome here to take lightly. It's arms and legs stayed motionless beneath the darkness and hid well just how colossal the silent observer was.
This being was the stone golem known as Gargantua, the Guardian of the 4th Floor of Nazarick.
The Guardian of this floor.
"You both have most certainly outdone yourselves." Ainz addressed the two standing in wait behind him with genuine praise.
"-and that is my report." Demiurge finished his monologue, hand over heart as he gave a proper bow. The entire thing had taken only roughly five minutes and none of the others within the room had interrupted him even once.
His subordinate done talking, Ainz looked back up from the world map Albedo had laid out across his desk. The maid to his right, Fifth, he believed her name was, held numerous more scrolls and papers that the two Guardians had brought in, but Ainz felt no urge to have them gone through right now as well.
"Excellent work, Demiurge. Your efforts have pleased me greatly. Though given your history, I suppose I'd be foolish to expect anything less."
"Such praise! I am unworthy, Lord Ainz." Demiurge said with a slightly deeper bow, his tone surprisingly humble and thankful for an archdevil.
Ainz's eyes went down again to the map, his quiet stare tracing along the coast from Re-Estize to the Holy Kingdom, and then Nazarick's distance from both.
"Does something trouble you, my lord?"
Ainz head perked back up at Albedo's question, realizing he'd been sitting in silence for too long.
"No, it's nothing. I was just pondering about the western sea. Demiurge," The archdevil straightened his posture as he was addressed by his master. "You spent much time in the Holy Kingdom's region. Did you have the opportunity to visit the bay?"
"Roughly three times over; the first two for information gathering and the third to set the area up as a possible [Gate] location if needed. However, most of my work was centered around the Abelion Hills. The sea was quite out of the way from there and thus I'm afraid I don't know much more than the broader details." Demiurge explained, his face showing he was clearly dissatisfied with himself for not being able to give a more through answer.
"That's quite understandable. I suppose mermaids and sea-folk would not be as useful as demi-humans in storming the capital, nor might they have had the same level of grudges against the kingdom."
"Right you are, my lord. Though there are some such as the Vah Uns with abilities relating heavily to water that lead me to believe they may have once had a greater connection to the sea before they were forced out by the humans. If you wish I can explore this theory more. We have a great many Vah Uns thanks to our acquisition of the Abelion Hills."
Ainz hand rested on his chin. "Hmm… It would be interesting to explore the concept of evolution in this world. Thus far everything has operated relatively close to straight guidelines of YGGDRASIL, with the greatest changes coming from level gains. Have these creatures always been the way they are or did they start off as something else and have to gain an affinity with water in order for their species not to go extinct? The answer could offer some insight onto how human and demi-humans may change over the generations having to co-exist with each other and the undead…" He muttered off his loose thoughts to himself.
The two servants exchanged looks between themselves.
"Lord Ainz, do you have a desire to visit the western sea yourself?" Albedo asked him.
"A desire? …Yes, I suppose I would eventually like to see it for myself. Even while adventuring as Momon I was aware Re-Estize and the Roble Holy Kingdom engaged in trade by way of sea but I was never in Re-Lobell, the closest port, to have a reason to be near the ocean. And my convoy with the Liberation Army didn't take me that close either.
"Plus…" He added thoughtlessly. "The others and I always did talk about taking a beach vacation. But we never found the time."
The two of the three greatest minds in Nazarick were lost only for a second before understanding quickly who the "others" were. The other forty Supreme Beings of Ainz Ooal Gown.
This talk must have been quite long ago, back in their prior world of Helheim. The only body of water the two were aware of there was the Grenbera Swamp in which the Great Tomb was originally located, though given that no one outside of the Supreme Beings ever left Nazarick before coming to this new world, it was little surprise the creators would know of a sea their creations were ignorant of.
"We'll get started right away!" Albedo joyously declared.
"Started?" Ainz said, his head jerking back up, feeling like he'd missed a scene.
"We'll have to survey the area for at least a few weeks. Make absolutely certain we can spot and clear away any possible threats." Demiurge said.
"Hold on-"
"Clearing away the indigenous species may be the most efficient solution in that case." Albedo threw out the suggestion to her fellow Guardian. "Though if the goal is for Lord Ainz to be able to observe them, perhaps we could fence off specific areas as enclosures?"
"Wait a min-"
"Ah! Yes, that I can do. For some of them I may even be able to create multiple areas; one for natural, undisturbed observation and the other to be more of a petting zoo. After all, what is a vacation without entertainment?"
"A splendid idea. And of course, I'll have to get Pestonya to prepare a legion of maids for such a trip. Given how much larger in scope this will be than Lord Ainz's stay-at-home vacation, some more resources may need to be pulled in as well. Perhaps the Pleiades, and even Sebas could-"
"Such noise. I demand silence!" He finally managed to cut them off, invoking the practiced manner he'd gone over so many times over in the privacy of his quarters. Ainz was relieved to see its effects were immediate and Demiurge and Albedo quickly stopped talking, bowing down to give their master their full attention and clearly ashamed of themselves for how much their excitement had overtaken them.
With a closed hand up to his mouth, instilled into him as a polite habit, Ainz cleared his throat, despite not exactly having one as he once did.
"While I am grateful for your enthusiasm, I fear you both are rushing with too much haste to fulfill what is merely a whim for me at the moment."
"Forgive us, lord." Albedo apologized for both herself and Demiurge, whom gave no objection. "It's just…that is our purpose in life. Our sole reason for existing is to see that your whims and desires be made into a reality, however small or large they may be."
"I understand. However, I am not a spoiled child. I make no such demands that I get everything I want the moment I want it, most especially when the timing is inconvenient." Ainz attempted to explain himself. "Besides, like I said, such a vacation is not one I planned going on by myself. I'm fully aware you all cannot see yourselves as equivalent to your creators but, were I to go, I would wish to bring the Floor Guardians along with me; not as servants but rather as fellow vacationers. A holiday is hardly as enjoyable without company, after all. It's different from a day off in that regard."
Demiurge and Albedo both were taken aback by their master's incredible generosity…as well as a bit conflicted about it. Ainz could tell by the looks on their faces. Of everything the NPCs excelled at, relaxation was not one of them. Albedo was not exaggerating in how she said they viewed their life's purpose; to serve and nothing more.
"As such, with the unknown assailant who brainwashed Shalltear still out there, such a large movement of so many of Nazarick's key members would be a massive risk, and a very unnecessary one at that." He continued on with ramblings from the top of his head, throwing out the idea like a bone in hopes it'd be satisfactory. "So many of us clustered together outside of our own territory would be a prime target for our unseen enemy. Even with our own on hand, any World Item could easily turn an even fight into a massacre. There are simply too many factors we'd have to account and prepare for, to the point I don't believe it'd be worth it in the end. Not when we have so much else we already are doing. …Those are my feelings, anyway."
That, thankfully, seemed to win them over. "Understood. Forgive us for acting so hasty, my lord." Demiurge bowed his head low again. Like when she spoke for him, Albedo gave no objections to his words. She felt the same.
"I must ask that you two not take any drastic actions or change the current plans we have set in motion. Not to fit in something like this." Ainz said, just for further clarification. "I'd far rather have things done right than quickly. Besides, despite the drill I included into your plan, Demiurge, I have no intentions of dying anytime soon. As such there is no need to rush things. Am I understood?"
"Yes, lord!" Both Guardians spoke in unison with a perfectly synchronized bow.
That conversation was roughly three weeks ago. At the time Ainz had been proud of how he handled it. The NPCs too often had the problem of taking everything he said far too literally, causing them to act on orders he never realized he gave. At the time, Ainz thought he'd done well to nip the problem in the bid before it could start.
It was then three days ago that Ainz had been told this place was almost ready, as per his request. Apparently, like with many things the NPCs brought up with him, it was something Ainz was already supposed to know about.
"I need to stop skimming the documents I'm supposed to sign off on." Ainz sobbed inside his head.
Back when it was just Nazarick, while it was difficult he still managed to plow his way through the reports he was given and gain at least some understanding of what was going on around him. But once the Sorcerer Kingdom became set-up, there was simply too much coming in from too many places, nearly all of it far too complicated for a simple salaryman to comprehend. The one thing that helped keep Ainz from cracking under the pressure was that Albedo and Demiurge were infinitely smarter than him, thus he could generally trust their judgement and sign off on their proposals with little worry of what they contained. If he'd bothered to read in full even just one or two during these past few weeks, he might have seen that they contained asking for his permission to use this floor and a few key items to create this oceanfront wonderland.
"We worked diligently to create a beach worthy of your presence, my lord." Albedo said. "The beaches of the Northern Holy Kingdom and Re-Lobell acted as the basic templates we started from, with the additional details coming from the many books of reference in the library on the 10th floor."
"Ashurbanipal has books on beaches?" Ainz thought in curious surprise. He supposed it was possible. In addition to spell books that were items directly from YGGDRASIL, Nazarick's library contained many out-of-copyright books from Ainz's original world that were legally safe for downloading into the game. However, most of those were through the efforts of Tabula Smaragdina and he was primarily into classic literature, novels, and books of the occult. It was hard to imagine him pulling in books full of sun and fun at the beach.
Then again, there were also plenty of fanfictions in that library written by players of YGGDRASIL, both in and outside of the guild Ainz Ooal Gown; a thought of which made a nervous Ainz want to quickly find something else to think about.
He looked and pointed up at the Sun. "That effect… Am I correct in assuming that is the Mid-Tier item Nurturing Daylight?"
"Correct you are, my lord." Demiurge answered, his joyful tone showing how impressed he was that his master had recognized the item so quickly. "With the assistance of Pandora's Actor we were able to narrow down a list considerably of items that could simulate the Sun and its warmth underground, at no cost to Nazarick itself."
Ainz thought about what he knew of the item. It increased the amount of time summoned plant-based monsters could stay out as well as increasing their resistance to damage by 10%. Sometimes 20% if certain conditions were met. He remembered Punitto Moe would use it sometimes in the early days after he joined the guild, as his in-game avatar was a Death Vine and would receive the item's benefits too. Though he eventually stopped using it once he obtained better and more efficient items and Nurturing Daylight was kept in storage ever since.
If Ainz was remembering correctly, the item could be used up to six times a day, with a decent lasting time per each cast as it wasn't a particularly powerful item in comparison to many others in YGGDRASIL. If he had to guess Demiurge had some of his subordinates hidden somewhere out of sight to keep the item active.
"And the horizon and blue sky?" Ainz asked next. While he rarely had to venture to the 4th floor he still knew quite well that it was not an infinite room. It most certainly had walls on all sides; walls which were absent now.
"Illusion magic, of course." Demiurge continued. "While it's obviously nothing in comparison to what Lord Blue Planet created for the 6th floor, we endeavored to create as wide and immaculate an ocean and coast as possible."
"I see." Ainz commented with a nod. If he had to guess, the choices for where to put the beach had probably been between the 4th floor and the 6th floor. The deciding factor was likely the lakes themselves. The 6th floor was significantly larger than the 4th, easily being the largest in Nazarick, in fact. But the 4th's underground lake was significantly larger than the 6th's, giving more room to swim out and more blank space as not to muddle the illusion that one was on a beach.
He didn't bother asking about the sand. Even to him it seemed pretty obvious that it'd been created by simply grinding up rocks until it reached the fineness desired. A simple explanation that was the most likely to be true. That said, Ainz was somewhat curious what type of rocks they'd used. There was plenty of brown on this beach but a good deal of white mixed in he was starting to notice as well, giving the shore a very pleasing tan to even peach shade in color as it reflected the sun's rays. He might have to give in and ask Demiurge about it at a later time.
It wasn't a real beach. Only a simulation, really. But a damn good one at that. A little like a fancy resort.
Ainz looked over his current attire with some embarrassment. He'd acquired many cosmetic and clothing related items during his years playing YGGDRASIL, most of which he'd never equipped even once but still showed his hoarder tendencies in never throwing any of it away. To think he'd be bringing something like this out now in place of his normal God-level items…
A blue Hawaiian style button-up shirt with white flowers, open toed sandals, and a pair of breezy tan short. It was only due to equipment mechanics that they were not falling off his meatless skeleton body, staying on surprisingly secure despite a complete lack in resistance. Ironically, Ainz had been excited when he first won these clothes in the random lottery, as they offered resistance against fire; a critical weakness of undead like him. But he later would find out the increase in resistance was only about 0.5%. It was genuinely just another useless gag item by those shitty devs.
He had worn this outfit only once and then never again. It was at the insistence of Bukubukuchagama and Peroroncino; neither of whom could stop laughing even after he took it off. Apparently Ainz looked like he could be someone's dad.
"I am very proud of the both of you for what you've created here." Ainz praised the two again, getting more bows in response. "And with that, I most certainly hope neither of you have forgotten what else I said. I don't wish for this to be a vacation just for me but for others under my rule as well. That includes the both of you."
"Your kindness knows no bounds, lord." Albedo said.
"We could never forget even a single word of your majestic speech." Demiurge added on. "As per your orders, the other Guardians and the Pleiades Six Stars were sent ahead and are further down this beach, save for those whom had matters to finish up on their floors first and thus will be along shortly. They have been tasked with working out any last minute imperfections they find before you arrive, at which time the collective Beach Vacation Day shall begin."
"Very good." Ainz thanked him, inwardly begging that the two truly weren't misunderstanding his intentions as anything beyond the basic and obvious. The last time he'd taken a vacation, primarily in the hopes of encouraging the NPCs to eventually do the same, Albedo had tasked the ENTIRETY of the Homunculus Maid staff to assist him in every last part of his time off. Literally every last part, including moving him. They were determined to make sure he wouldn't have to do anything himself and for those three days of vacation Ainz had never felt more stressed out in his life. Even being the ruler of a new raising nation was a windfall compared to that. He couldn't go through it all again.
"Everyone taking part in the vacation has been instructed to enjoy themselves." Albedo explained, Ainz feeling like that statement sounded like a bit of a contradiction to itself but whatever. "They have been informed on proper beach vacation procedure and are all garbed in appropriate beach attire.
"…Speaking of which…" She added on, a shy smile and a red blush coming across her features as Albedo held her hands together behind her back. "Is my garment…satisfactory, my lord?"
"Dammit. I was hoping to avoid this." Ainz swore to himself. If he had the ability to sweat he most certainly would be doing so and not because of the sun.
Admittedly, it was more modest than most would probably imagine the swimsuit of a succubus to be. It wasn't composed entirely of straps or strings or didn't only cover up her nipples and nothing else. Honestly it was a fairly normal white bikini set.
The issue was that it was clad around Albedo and her very generous figure. She was properly covered and yet the way it hugged her figure still felt like very little was being left to the imagination. It was one of the few times Ainz was grateful for the emotional dampener placed upon him by his Overlord body. While he hated the feelings of emptiness it'd often leave him with, it was certainly invaluable in help him resist temptation and avoid doing something he knew he'd regret. To Ainz, a boss taking advantage of a subordinate, especially in a sexual way, was unforgivable.
All that said, Ainz had no idea where she actually got the outfit from. He couldn't speak for the other NPCs but he, rather embarrassingly, knew firsthand that all Tabula had left to Albedo in terms of a wardrobe was the one style of dress and an entire duffel bag of underwear. He supposed maybe a bikini was close enough to a bra that Tabula might have included it in the bag, but if that was the case and Ainz was assuming the NPCs didn't have a way to get new clothes for themselves, then now he was going to have to wonder why Ulbert left Demiurge with a speedo!
Quite frankly Ainz was doing his best to avoid looking too directly at either of his subordinates right now, though for very different reasons between them.
"It…looks quite lovely on you." Ainz told her, trying to pick his words very carefully. He typically couldn't bring himself to blame Albedo much for how she would act sometimes. After all, the cause was likely because of him screwing with her settings and warping her feelings for him. Still, he had no desire to get tackled and mounted again and so chose carefully what he hoped wouldn't set her off. "I am very pleased you both are getting into the spirit of things."
Albedo's features brightened immensely and for a moment Ainz nearly took a step back, fearing he'd still said too much. But then…
"What do you think of my attire, Lord Ainz?"
Ainz, Demiurge, and a very instantly soured Albedo turned in unison to the interrupting voice, having just arrived via the warp gate.
Shalltear Bloodfallen, accompanied by a duo of her Vampire Brides; one to carry her belongings and the other to hold the black parasol overhead to provide her master shade. Despite being a vampire herself, Shalltear's high level should mean any penalty she'd receive from the sun would be practically non-existent, so it must have been just a personal preference.
"…Is that a school swimsuit?" Ainz's thoughts finally gathered themselves cohesively enough to form that observation. Indeed, the dark blue one-piece was in fact a Sukumizu, with Shalltear's own name written across the white tag across the chest. Admittedly Ainz had never seen one in person before. The schools 99% of the population back in his old world could afford to go to didn't exactly have the budget or resources for athletics. But cultural osmosis and plenty of old anime had informed him over time as to exactly what she was wearing.
In this case at least, Ainz had no trouble believing Peroroncino had left such a thing to his pride-and-joy creation.
"Excuse me, Shalltear, but we were in the middle of a conversation." Albedo spoke at her. Politely enough but the tone underneath the words made it quite clear she was very unhappy about the vampire's presence here. "Lord Ainz was just giving me his thoughts on my swimsuit."
"A short sentence no doubt. You're not really giving much to comment on, after all." Shalltear quipped, feigning ignorance as to Albedo's clear irritation with her.
"Excuse me?"
She flashed a smirk. "I take it you're familiar with Gap Moe?" Shalltear asked, closing one eye while the other shot a prideful, challenging look.
"Of course I am." Albedo said, sounding offended by the very question. "Lord Tabula himself was a fan of the genre and designed my sisters and I in accordance with it."
Shalltear gave a small snort. "Oh? Well then, you must have just been his practice before creating the Gap Moe characteristics for your sisters. That's the only conclusion I can come up with for this poor current showing."
"What was that, you preserved lamprey?" One could almost hear Albedo's teeth crack. Her face still kept its normal, pure smile but the twitch at the end of her lips showed well how little she appreciated that remark.
Shalltear just gave a smirk as her retort. "Gap Moe is defined as something completely contradictory to one's usual behavior or appearance; highly appealing because it is to see the person in a completely different light that you never expect." The vampire then jabbed her finger forward dramatically to point at her rival's chest. "The biggest difference in your current attire is that your swimsuit exposes more skin. Other than that it's hardly a noticeable change from what you usually wear. There's no excitement to be had because it's what's already been seen."
Shalltear then folded her arms behind her head seductively.
"Compare that to beautifully white skin almost constantly hidden behind the fabric of a flowing evening dress, now being unwrapped like a gift to the world's eyes. Between the two, it's simply no contest."
Albedo's eye gave a twitch. The fact that she hadn't already attempted strangling Shalltear showed her incredible self-control, she'd like to think. For her to throw such statements around like she knew a thing about what Lord Tabula had instilled within her very being…!
But then, to Shalltear's surprise, Albedo's face relaxed itself, the succubus then giving a small, short chuckle. One that was almost…pitying?
"Heh. Your understanding of true Gap Moe is most saddening if you think just a contrast to one's usual appearance is what's most desirable." Albedo said, certainly using her greater height to her advantage; looking down upon Shalltear with a smug and knowing smile. "The kind you're using is merely a gimmick. A momentary titillation. It'll spice things up for a moment but any lover will get bored quickly with it if that's all the attraction there is." She placed her hand over her heart. "True Gap Moe is a constant factor; a part of one's true self. To have the beauty of an angel, yet the twisted black soul of a demon. To be the tempter and destroyer of any man whom so foolishly cast their unworthy eyes upon you, yet to be the perfect wife for the one you love beyond all others, to the point you could not bear even the thought of another's touch. Darkness hidden beneath the light and light hidden beneath the darkness." She gave such a speech like it was a ballad etched into the very pumps of blood coursing through her veins. "That is true Gap Moe.
"And besides, even if I were wrong, which I'm not," Albedo added, pressing her finger into Shalltear's breast. "If you were truly committed to your version of Gap Moe you would have chosen a more revealing swimsuit and I think we know the real reason, or should I say two reasons, why you didn't. Such a shame. Gap Moe can be a trap but it's not meant to be an outright lie."
"You sagging old cow!"
"Like you would know what sag even looks like!"
Their foreheads collided and grinded against each other; lightning clashing between their stares as they refused to let the other budge them. Their murderous auras filled the air, making it grow thick and toxic.
"Experience tells me I should leave quickly before they try to get me involved in this." Ainz noted to himself before turning away from the sight. "Demiurge, I would like to see the rest of the beach."
"Of course, my lord. Right this way." Demiurge complied easily. Unbeknownst to him, this was one of the few times he actually did fully understand his master's mindset and the need to get away.
It was the tops of many blonde scalps that greeted Ainz as he and Demiurge arrived at what was clearly the main area for this retreat. At first the presence of so many maids gave him trembling flashbacks to his last vacation but he managed to push those worries aside for now, finding something else to distract his thoughts.
"Something smells amazing."
Again, Demiurge and Albedo had truly gone all out. A snack shack had been set up right here on the shore. The lumpy red and white myconid head of Nazarick's prized Sous-Chef could be spotted mixing drinks on the other side of the counter with the grace of a professional while the remaining Homunculus Maids not yet able to come to Ainz were busy tending the grills, likely under the chef's guidance.
Underneath the veranda of the shack, the large blue outer shell of Cocytus was able to be spotted almost instantly, sitting atop a single stool that held up his weight surprisingly well. The Guardian of the 5th floor looked no different than usual and that was probably for the best. Nudity was the natural state of his species and wearing a pair of trunks over his armored hide just for today would likely make it harder to not think about once he took them back off.
"He's really keeping himself tucked into the shade." Ainz commented to himself, noting that even Cocytus' long tail was curled quite inwardly towards the rest of his body to keep it under the veranda. "Like with Shalltear, Cocytus' level should be high enough that the sun's not affecting him in any significant way. Did I overlook something?" The possibility caused a pit to form in his stomach (not that he had one anymore. A pit on his orb?). True, he hadn't been aware that this beach was actually being made but it was still his idea to begin with, especially the part about having the Guardians join him for it. It hadn't even occurred to Ainz to ask the NPCs how they might feel about going to a beach. Everyone here was probably under the impression that it was his orders that they had to go. What were the odds that Cocytus, Shalltear, and who knows how many others were suffering in silence because they didn't wish to upset him?
While Ainz held in the painful guilt in his gut, a new figure approached from the side, standing before the maids.
"Welcome, Lord Ainz. Do you find everything to be to your satisfaction?"
Though it was no question who the elderly gentleman was, Ainz almost didn't recognize him at first outside of his normal butler attire, apparently having grown quite used to the sight of that black suit.
"Ah, Sebas! I'm quite glad you could make it. Yes, this entire place is very lovely." He said, taking the moment to glance around and take in more of the sights. Off in the blue of the ocean, he finally spotted some color and motion besides that of the waves. The Pleiades Six Stars off playing with each other in the water. Even from this distance away, Ainz could tell they were all dressed in attire that suited their individual character settings, though the most noticeable from here was CZ Delta's innertube, one of the same camo-print as her normal scarf and gloves. This gave more confidence to him that he was right about their creators giving them such swimwear a long time ago (as well as providing some relief, as Ainz just now realized he didn't know if any of the NPCs could actually swim). "They look like they're having fun."
"Indeed. We are all here at your service, lord."
"Hm." Ainz gave a small grunt, getting the feeling Sebas hadn't quite understood what he meant. Letting his eyes wander a bit more, he took notice of the tall white wooden chair in the direction Sebas had come from and then the small metal whistle around his neck. "So, you are our lifeguard, then?" He asked, coming to the natural conclusion.
"Indeed. I am truly honored by the duty you have bestowed upon me and I shall endeavor to meet all expectations you have."
"Probably not the best time to say that I only signed off on Demiurge and Albedo's ideas and didn't even know they were asking to assign you as Lifeguard." Ainz commented inwardly, admittedly unable to think of any time it'd be good to say such a thing.
In a non-judgmental way, Ainz did find Sebas' beach attire somewhat humorous, mainly because it both did and didn't suit him.
A red and white pinstriped pair of swimming trunks and shirt, blending together so well into each other that it almost looked like a one-piece. It was a very old-fashioned style of swimwear, which in that case certainly felt like it matched the very proper butler of steel. But it was still so bizarre to see him in such colors and relaxed attire.
And then a rather interesting thought crossed his mind; one that Ainz put more stock into now that he had both Demiurge and Sebas before him. He considered both Touch Me and Ulbert Alain Odle as his dear friends and comrades but it was no secret among the guild that the two didn't get along particularly well with each other. Primarily this was due to being such opposites, both in-game and outside of it, and while they'd put aside their differences (for the most part) for the good of Ainz Ooal Gown, their rivalry and deliberate competition with each other stretched its way down into the creation of their respective NPCs, designing them to be just as opposite as they were.
If Ulbert knew Touch Me was giving Sebas something like this, then Ainz could easily see him giving Demiurge something like that. Sadly, he could also see it being exactly the same the other way around.
"Is something wrong, Lord Ainz?".
Ainz could only give a mental sigh at Demiurge's question. "It's nothing. Just…nostalgia."
His comment leaving a somewhat puzzled expression on both the archdevil and the butler, Ainz turned back to the five Homunculus Maids standing in wait for an order.
"Am I correct in that all maids present, minus the Pleiades, are not on vacation with the rest of us? Rather, you are working as staff?"
"Indeed, my lord." The maid Lumière answered for the rest of the group, to no objections. "We are here to fulfill every desire the Supreme One and his Guardians have in order to ensure the most relaxing retreat possible."
"I see." Ainz said, unsurprised. It'd been nearly impossible for him to get even a single maid at a time to take a day off and that still required him to promise the workaholics that they could serve him directly the day after. He had absolute faith in minds of Nazarick's smartest and he still doubted the two would have been able to get an entire group of maids to go on retreat with them. That's actually why Ainz had only specified the Guardians and the Pleiades when he'd thoughtlessly pitched the idea before. Their superiors going on vacation might encourage the maids to do the same eventually.
"Do you have a task for us, Lord Ainz?"
"No, no. Nothing like that. I was merely pondering whether your uniforms were the best sort of clothes for working in this environment." Ainz answered, saying his thoughts aloud.
The maids looked at him and between each other in some confusion. "Do our uniforms dissatisfy you, lord?"
Despite lacking all manner of skin, muscles, or any other aspects of flesh, Ainz's skeletal body was not absent of the sense of touch. Rather, everything was slightly muffled, like his entire body had an invisible glove around it, putting a thin but noticeable barrier between him and everything else. As such, Ainz could feel temperature but had to be in extremes for him to take proper notice. Even the artic wastes of the 5th floor would barely phase him and he'd be fine in the hellscape that was the 7th floor as long as he didn't take a direct hit by a burst of lava or the like. This simulated sun didn't bother him in the slightest but if its rays were too much for Shalltear and Cocytus, how much might the maids be suffering? They were the lowest level NPCs in Nazarick after all.
Ainz heard a splash behind him and turned to it in interest.
"Lord Ainz! You're here!" The young elf girl Aura rushed her way up to him, moving so fast that the water dripping down her hair was almost completely ripped away into the air as she passed. Mare trailed behind her, running as well, though not with nearly the same speed or finesse. In contrast, he was completely dry, likely having just been watching Aura from the shore and not wanting to go in himself.
"Gr-greetings, Lord Ainz." He spoke for the both of them as they stood present before his towering figure.
Ainz beamed happily at the two children. "Aura, Mare. I'm very delighted you were able to make it. Tell me, what do you think of this beach?"
"This place is great!" Aura cheered, arms and fists in the air. "I can swim out way farther on this lake than the one on the 6th Floor and go down way deeper too. I can't remember the last time I got so much room to move around in what wasn't a forest."
"The air is really nice too." Mare chimed in, still sincere but far more contained than his sister. "It stays nice and warm even when I'm reading under the shade."
Ainz laughed merrily. "I'm glad to hear it!" He said, truly meaning it. While he was more of an uncle or a caretaker than a direct parent, Ainz did believe a goal of many parents was to provide their children with a better life than they themselves had had. No child in his old world could have ever experienced such a luxurious place. Most certainly not himself. That he was now able to give the elf twins such a thing that he never had, he did believe there was a surge of warmth flowing through his chest. "Be certain to thank Demiurge and Albedo for all their hard work when you have the chance."
"Yes, lord!" They said in unison.
Taking a moment to observe their attire, Ainz could see the consistency in comparison to what the two normally wore. While he couldn't remember the last time he saw Aura without her dragon scale leather, it was of little surprise that her swimsuit's base was more like tight shorts than loose hanging trunks. If he recalled correctly, Bukubukuchagama had actually specifically told him the reason why she gave Aura pants was because she was planning to make her a Beast Tamer. To wear anything more open would be incredibly uncomfortable while riding an animal. It was a roleplay logic Ainz could appreciate…though he never did get a concrete answer for her putting Mare in a skirt (and quite frankly, he wasn't sure he wanted to dig that deep).
Still, the rest of her outfit was a basic, black, child's swimsuit. This could have been one of the few times Aura actually did look more feminine than Mare…and it would seem Bukubukuchagama had taken that into account as well. Mare's white one-piece covered up more skin than Aura's two, but the bright orange ruffles along his hips and across the straps holding the suit on at his shoulders would have made it no contest all on their own, even without the large, bloomed flowers that sat atop his feet from his sandals. As it stood, with his outfit and timid posture, Mare came across far more like a little sister than a twin brother.
Between Bukubukuchagama and Peroroncino, Ainz had begun to suspect that Peroroncino was simply the less subtle of the siblings.
Ainz momentarily lost in his thoughts, Aura peeked around his side. "Hey, what are they doing?"
Her words regaining his attention, Ainz turned around in curiosity.
If he still had lungs they probably would have leapt out of his mouth. In that case, such a thing might have prevented the panicked scream that exited instead.
The five maids with whom Ainz had just been talking were stripping away their uniforms, some already down to their underwear.
"What-! What are you doing?!" His hands rose to cover his eyes but the emotional suppresser kicked on halfway through; his clearer mind reminding him that's not what a dignified ruler would do and thus he kept them down.
The maids looked back at him in puzzlement. "We believed our uniforms were inappropriate for this beach setting, and so we removed them. Forgive us, lord. Did we misunderstand you?"
"You think?!" Ainz's brain screamed what he did not allow his mouth to. Looking back, he could now easily see how his words and lack of clarification had led them to such a nonsensical conclusion. While Ainz didn't outright look away, he kept his gaze trained in just such a direction that the girls were only in his peripherals. He wasn't sure why this felt worse than seeing them in bikinis, which would be showing about as much skin if not more, but it did. It didn't matter if he was more like a king than a CEO, he was still their boss! It was inappropriate for him to see them like this. Most certainly for him to order them to do it!
"I merely meant that with the overhead sun and the heat I was worried your uniforms might be uncomfortable. If your uniforms are what you feel you can do your jobs most comfortably in, then there is no problem with keeping them on. That is all."
"We see. Thank you, lord. Your kindness is limitless." Lumière said, the others taking a bow along with her.
"Put your damn clothes back on!" Ainz mind screamed as his eyes went to the furthest point in his sockets to avoid looking down their bras. "Pay it no mind. Now please, get dressed."
The maids complied, picking their aprons and dresses back up from the folded stacks they'd laid down on the sand.
"I glad Albedo and Shalltear haven't caught up to us yet to see this. Who knows what kind of weird ideas those two would have gotten?" Ainz sighed, rubbing his face in relief. "But wait! Aura and Mare! They're way too young to have seen something like that!"
Ainz turned quickly, fearing the stares of judgment that may have been directed into his back over such a perverse abuse of power. However, the heterochromatic eyes of the twins looked at him only with happiness, having simply been waiting for him to pay attention to them again and now he was. Not even Demiurge and Sebas had changed their expressions in the slightest, like nothing out of the ordinary had just occurred.
On the one hand, this incredibly casual attitude, lacking in all sense of common norms, was the main cause of the maids believing they needed to strip down to their skivvies. On the other, it did allow for Ainz to entirely pretend like that hadn't just happened. And pretend he did.
"Now then, where is next on my tour of this beach?" He asked. The squad of maids dressing themselves were behind him and completely outside of his vision. As such, as far as he and his sanity were concerned, they did not exist at this moment.
"Right this way we have the main lounging area." Demiurge answered him, holding out his arm to direct attentions to the set-up of spread out towels, chairs, and wide, shady umbrellas; located close enough to easily reach the water with a short walk but at enough of a distance that the tide would not splash those relaxing in it.
"We… W-we set up our towels next to your chair, i-if that's alright." Mare said shyly as he took a small step forward, averting his gaze as he was having a hard time looking directly at Ainz.
Ainz gave a small but hearty chuckle. "Of course it's alright." He said to the quickly brightening faces of the elf twins. "Speaking of which, where is my-….."
He'd cut himself off. Just a few turns of his head and Ainz didn't have to ask anymore. He figured it out upon sight.
"Demiurge… I take it you created that…chair, yes?"
"Indeed, my lord! It is honor that you would recognize my craftsmanship at just a glace!"
"I don't see how I could ever forget." Ainz commented, the red lights of his eyes going out, the only way his skeleton body could "close" them and not have to look at the sight before him.
If you were significantly far enough away, it'd look like just a normal lounge chair sitting on the beach. White to reflect the sun's rays and nice and long so that a person could stretch out comfortably.
But sadly, it was not far away. It was only a few meters and thus Ainz couldn't ignore the obvious. Couldn't ignore the many ribs that acted as the chair's surface. Couldn't ignore the large pelvis that acted as the chair's back. Couldn't ignore the human shaped skulls that acted as the chair's feet.
Once more, Demiurge had built him a seat constructed almost entirely out of bones. Somehow, this felt more disturbing than the throne he'd made him for the imitation Nazarick. Perhaps because the sun and beach towels made it stand out far more as something that should not exist in this world.
He could feel Demiurge beaming with pride behind him, making it all the harder for Ainz to think of a way out. Apparently no one else present was aware of what was wrong with this picture.
"I can't sit on that! What am I supposed to do?!" His thoughts screamed at him so loud he was surprised his emotional suppressor didn't kick on again. First the maids, now this! He couldn't escape from this situation the same way as last time. After Cocytus begging him to use his body as a chair, Ainz feared sitting on Shalltear had sparked some very warped ideas regarding punishment in the NPCs, so even if any of them were deserving of it he had no desire to continue fanning the flames of such a mindset.
After a painfully long minute of stressful brainstorming, a stroke of inspiration mercifully revealed itself and Ainz opened his eyes. Clasping his hands together, he turned to the elf twins.
"Aura. Mare. How would you two like to bury me in the sand?"
His question came as quite a clear shock to the two, though Demiurge's mood seemed only to improve at it. "Ah. A wise first choice for relaxation, my lord."
The twins' pleading faces looked to Demiurge for answers, baffled as to why he was so okay with, what was in their minds, basically desecration of the Supreme One's perfect body.
"Allow me to explain." Demiurge said, not keeping them in suspense for long. "According to what I've read, burying someone up to their neck in the sand is a very common activity for the beach, especially for adults to do with children. They can create funny shapes and poses out of the sand while proving sufficiently relaxing for the person being buried, as the sand's blocking of the sun's rays allows it to be cool yet warm at the same time."
"Oh! I get it!" Mare said, the image of the sand like a giant blanket coming to his head, immediately able to see why that would be so comfortable. Aura's odd look showed she didn't understand it quite as much, though to be fair her idea of enjoyment was more akin to activity than staying in bed. Still, it was what Ainz wanted and there was no way she was going to pass up more time to be around him.
Apparently, Demiurge had already considered everything, as he had pails and little shovels at the ready before Ainz even had to ask. Laying down in a spot that would not disturb the lounge area, Ainz closed his eyes and interlocked his fingers across his chest, allowing the two children to start scooping the sand over him. While at first there was the slight worry of particles getting in between his joints, he decided he'd leave that concern for later as he felt the gentle pressure of the sand's weight start to consume him. It was quite nice actually; the sensation being just as Demiurge described.
"When you declare you are done with your rest, we shall then begin the Beach Games, my lord." Demiurge said as he watched over the three, his calm tone making it clear there was no hurry. Sebas wanted to stay but he had a job to do and thus ripped himself away from his master's side to keep watch over the rest of the shore.
Though it took a moment for them to register, Ainz eventually reopened his eyes, picking up on those last words.
"Beach Games?"
Author's notes: This is just kind of a fun, dumb story that I wanted to try out, mostly because of talks on the Overlord Reddit about the series not having its own beach episode, with the closest being the time in Nazarick's spa and the Isekai Quartet beach episode.
For everyone's swimwear, save for ainz, I tried to pull from Overlord connected sources. Albedo and Demiurge's outfit come from the aforementioned Isekai Quartet beach episode. Shalltear's comes from chapter 7 of Overlord The Undead Oh! gag manga. She never wore it but it was an outfit in her wardrobe, so I'm counting it. Aura's comes from artwork So-Bin did for one of the light novels. Mare's comes from the Little Leaders Overlord fanart. Cocytus doesn't wear clothes, so didn't need to do anything there. I haven't described any of the Pleiades outfits yet but they all are from the Mass of the Dead mobile game, so if you Google "overlord mass for the dead beach", it's the first image that pops up.
Sebas is an exception because his outfit didn't come from anything Overlord related but rather from My Hero Academia. It's the same swimsuit All Might wore when he's first training Midoriya on the beach. For whatever reason, I thought it seemed like a good fit for Sebas.
By the way, while I've already got ideas for the beach games and activities, I wouldn't mind getting more suggestions for some people want to see, as I easily could have overlooked an obvious one.