I rounded the corner, already sensing that he was near. Him. The vampire. The one who held all the control whenever we were in a room together. Lady Danbury and Uncle's words still clanged around in my head, unable to escape or leave me alone in peace. And yet… I held my breath as I stood there hidden around the bend. And yet I knew something was wrong with me. I'd heard of vampires falling in love with humans before but never my kind learning to love them. Well, that's not true- obviously. I loved Uncle with every bone in my body; of course humans could love vampires. But this… This was a different feeling. Lord Basset made me feel a way I'd never experienced before. My head slowly popped out from the corner to peer over to where he was currently standing. He was by the door, putting on his black leather gloves; vampires always wore gloves, rarely exposing any skin but their faces and necks. Seeing him my heart immediately started beating strongly. Why….? What's wrong with me? What's going on?
Why can't I breathe whenever I look at him?
I wasn't fast enough to pull my head back in before his grace spotted me. Lord Basset instantly perked up and I saw that shimmer in his eyes- the same glow as the first night we got a good look at each other's faces. But he already knew I was there so I very, very shyly came out from my hiding place. I was wearing a light pink satin dress with lace trim. My arms were bare, as were my hands and shoulders. No vampire dressed this way; not because they thought it was immodest but they didn't want to risk burning their skin. Human skin also burned but at a much slower rate. As such the duke- who was covered entirely in black with the exception of his head- and I looked entirely different from each other.
We didn't say anything right away, simply ogling the other like they were a living work of art. I was still in disbelief how perfect he was. How is it possible for someone to be that attractive? Compared to him, I felt wholly inadequate. But judging by what the duke said when he finally broke the long silence, I doubt he shared this opinion. His eyes were wide and glued onto me in this sort of awestruck way. "My god…. You're beautiful," the way he said this, I think he was talking more to himself than to me. Still, I blushed- of course- which was probably a bad move on my part. Lord Basset saw the colour of my cheeks change and he immediately tore his face away. I noticed his throat flash a little. "U-Uh, t-thank you, my lord," I would have tacked on that he looked fine too but was too embarrassed as it was.
Without thinking or looking back my way, Lord Basset instinctively held out his arm for me to take. I froze, as did he when he realized what he was doing. It was custom for male vampires to hold a lady's arm when taking her somewhere. But that's with two vampires. Being a human, vampires were never to touch me. Again, it's not an immoral thing; it's a life-preserving thing. Caressing a human's skin was too tempting; they could feel our blood flow in our veins. Ironically the only time it was safe for a vampire to touch a human was after they drank their blood, as this reduced some of the temptation. Uncle drank some of my blood when I was an infant without biting me, and so he was the only vampire whoever touched me in my entire life. Not even my mother or father held me when I was an infant, as Lady Danbury said. I did not know that before she told me this, but it only confirmed what I suspected.
Lord Basset retracted his arm and cleared his throat, still not looking at me. But he did motion for me to stay where I was for a second. "Stay here. I'll go see if it's safe first." Oh my god, I suddenly wanted to roll my eyes so hard. I'd been out countless times since I got here and never saw anyone outside before. This is something I felt his grace should know too. "It is safe, my lord. There's no one out there, and even if there is, isn't the reason why you're escorting me?"
The duke looked back my way for a second time since I arrived. There wasn't anger in his expression but more realization- the realization that I was right. Hesitantly he held the door open for me and motioned me forward with his free hand. Our eyes didn't meet until we were outside but I could feel his burn a hole through me as I quickly passed by him. He followed suit at rapid speed, closing the door behind him. With his black umbrella open and up, he maintained a safe distance from me, who was elated to be back out in the sun. Lord Basset watched me smile and stretch my arms out wide in the sunshine. My eyes shut for a minute as I soaked in the rays. Ah, now this is what living is all about.
His grace's gaze lowered softly onto my figure. "So strange. I've never seen anyone bask in the sun before." "That makes sense. The sun doesn't affect me like it does your kind," I grinned back at him. Lord Basset took a few steps in my direction; he was smiling but he had this sort of contented look on his face. "I never realized how different our species are before I met you. It's like you're an entirely different creature from me." "In some regards, you're correct, my lord. But I was birthed by vampires, just like you, and I do need sustenance, like you. And we also age at the same rate." "True, but your kind is suspectable to disease and disaster." "Mmmmm, well that's true. That's where you've got us beat; that, and physical strength," I admitted freely. I wasn't ashamed of my lack in these areas anymore; Uncle taught me there was no reason to be ashamed.
That's when his grace gave me this tiny smile. It was almost indictable but I could see it. He took yet another step my way, closing the distance to about five feet now. His eyes met mine, lowering a little. "Come then. Teach me what you find so appealing about this garden. I want to learn more about your kind- about you. The more time I spend with you, the more fascinating I think humans to be." My eyes grew large, my heart fluttered inside my chest again. He thinks I'm fascinating? Just by the fact that I'm human?
No one's ever told me that before.
I was smiling at the duke before I knew I was doing so. My head gently nodded up and down, my gaze not leaving his. "Very well then, your grace. Let me show you all this garden of yours has to offer."
The next hour was one of bliss. We scrolled all around the garden wall, being mindful to stay at least five feet apart as we did so. I picked flowers, weaving them into my braid. The animals stayed away from us but I made sure to wave to them in the distance as we passed by. They watched us with apprehension and curiosity. Lord Basset too, grew more and more engaged as the morning went one. He didn't say much, letting me do most of the talking, with every once and a while giving me a nod or a side smile. Though he didn't say so, I could tell he was enjoying himself.
After two trips around the garden wall, we found a very shaded place underneath a gigantic oak tree to sit and rest. Lord Basset folded up his umbrella only once he was out of the sun and laid down onto the grass. I sat nearby, far enough to be out of arm's reach but close enough so we could still talk. And talk we did.
It was contently quiet for a few moments, with Lord Basset gazing out at his garden and I fixing some flowers in my hair. But eventually his head turned toward me; his eyes gentle and complex. "I never knew being outside could be such a tranquil experience," he signed. I nodded in agreement, still playing with the pink and white blossoms. "Yes. There's nowhere I like being so much than in a garden. Gardens are safe; they're safer than being in the forest, yet you're still out in the sun and amongst the flowers." "You must always be preoccupied with your safety?" He said this in such a way that it sounded like a question. My head nodded again. "I have to be. It's very precarious, being human…. There's little protection offered to me in a world of vampires."
The duke chuckled. "Yet you made such a fuss when I forbade you to be out here alone." "Because you're being overly-cautious, my lord." "Mmmmm, I don't think so. You know what I see when I watch you out here, among the trees and flowers? You're like a bird or rabbit- an animal that's so at home yet so vulnerable and at risk. It's only natural that I want to preserve you, just like how you wish to preserve the safety of all your little animal friends back there," he shut his eyes for a second, placing both his hands behind his head in a relaxed fashion. I'd never seen Lord Basset so calm and comfortable around me before…. I didn't reply, instead electing to watch him in such a pose. It made me so happy to see him this way; I can't tell you why, but it really, really did.
My ogling was interrupted when his grace reopened his eyes and turned on his side to face me. His folded elbow propped up his head in a casual fashion. He looked back at me with ease. "What is it like to be a human? To be so powerless and yet the to have the privilege to bask in the sun?" I considered his thoughtful question for a moment, letting my eyes wander a bit. "Well… I don't know. I love being in the sun; I love gardens and animals. I even love the food I eat! I just…. love being human. But… it's frightening, knowing not only that you could be eaten any day but also that you have no personal autonomy. I'm just lucky Anthony does want to sell me… Well, at least to anyone I don't want him to." "You mean you want to be sold?" Lord Basset's eyebrow raised up a little. "I asked him to let our great uncle buy me, even though Uncle has never brought up the topic himself. I know he's inquired about it before but he doesn't feel comfortable discussing it with me. I think…. he's come to see me like his own. The idea of selling me repulses him, I guess."
Lord Basset's head nodded in an understand way. "I see what he means. Before I met you I never thought twice about the practice of buying, selling, or eating humans. I'd never seen one and so had no reason to think that doing so is wrong." "Do you think it's wrong?" I asked, genuinely curious to hear his answer. He looked at me a second before replying. "It's difficult to say. Even if I did think that, there's nothing I can do about it. It's always been this way; humans are property and a food source. There's no other role for you in society as it is." "And yet…. I may be my brother's property but I'm not a food source." "No one's ever drunk your blood then?" "My uncle has once." The duke suddenly appeared scandalized, causing me to hastily wave my hands around in front of me. "It was when I was a baby! He didn't bite me and it was the only way he could hold me without…." My sentence cut off, only for his grace to finish it. "Without eating you alive?" Peering back his way, my head very gently nodded. Then our eyes locked, mine soulful and sincere. "No one's ever…. bitten me before."
To my surprise, Lord Basset seemed satisfied with this. He laid back down onto the grass, staring up at the tree canopy above us. Watching him do so, I saw my opportunity to ask him a question. "What's it like being a vampire? I've lived with your kind all my life and still feel like I have no idea what's truly going on inside your mind." After blinking at me, his grace closed his eyes.
"What's it like? Intense- that's the best word I can think to describe it. You humans have emotions like us, but we experience the world much more forcefully. Everything is dictated by our thirst, and satisfying that thirst. The only emotion we don't feel with such power is paradoxically love for another. We can hate each other with a vengeance, but when it comes to loving other vampires….. Of course it's not a conscious choice; vampire marriage would be much more agreeable if we could form intimate attachments. My father once said it's a survival instinct. We may live in a society, but when you strip away all else the one thing all vampires have in common is their thirst. We're all competing to quench it with each other," he paused and I didn't dare interrupt him. It felt like there was more he wanted to say. His chest expanded slightly, his eyes opened a sliver. "Maybe that's why they say we can only fall in love with humans….. Humans aren't competing for the same source of food. Heh, you are the food. But still…. There's something about your kind. Something that instinctively draws us in. Well, some of us. Not all vampires can control their urges enough to form a bond with humans. That may be a defective gene on vampires who can."
"Defective gene?" My eyebrow rose up. I'd never heard that term before. Lord Basset's eyes drifted back over to me. "That's right. Vampires don't get sick like your kind. But some of us are born with defects in our genetic makeup. These defects can cause a host of flaws for the vampire in question, usually shortening their life-span." "They can?" I gasped surprised. He nodded. "Yes. That's what took my father; his bad genes caused him to die early. The only thing that would have saved his life was the blood of a whole human." "Really? That would have saved him?" Again, his grace's head gave a nod. "Human blood can save a vampire's life inches from death, but for something that severe it would require all the blood of a human. That's our medicine," he added with a mocking grin. I didn't say anything and his grace sat up, propping himself up with an arm extended behind him.
"But you don't need to worry about that," Lord Basset's other hand ran through his hair. Too late. The wheels in my head were turning. "Wait… So if human blood would have saved your father's life, and you knew that Anthony had a human sister, did you ever…..?" "No, I did not ask to buy you for the purpose of sparing my father's life. To be frank, the idea never came into my head. I didn't even look for a human. I just… accepted that he had faulty genes," he shrugged. My lips opened a sliver, waiting a second before making a sound. "But you… inherited your father's genes…?" As if reading my mind yet again, he flashed me another small, hidden smile which only I could detect. "I'm perfectly fine. If anything, the only defect in my genes is this absurd desire I have to keep you safe. I cannot describe it; I don't think I'll ever be able to. But it's there….. That's the other part of being a vampire. I don't love you, so why do I want to protect you so badly?"
I shrugged, trying my best not to blush. "Maybe it's your instinct pushing you to preserve me like storing your food?" "That's crass!" "Well, I don't know! You said so yourself- you don't love me. So what other reason would you have to protect me?" Unless he does love me… and doesn't recognize the sensation to be "love". Maybe his brain can't process the emotion because it doesn't occur between his kind, so instead it's replacing it with an emotion he can understand which is "protection". But that would mean that the duke loves…..
My brain broke my train of thought with a swift kick. No! No, that's impossible! Lord Basset doesn't love me; we barely even know each other! "You humans have emotions like us, but we experience the world much more forcefully." It can't be love yet! It can't be!
Lord Basset must have noticed I was in distress by the way I was clenching at my head and shaking it side to side violently. "Miss Bridgerton, are you alright?" "I-I'm fine! I'm fine!" I was so not fine, which I think his grace knew. But he still rested his cheek on the palm of his hand and kept watching me. His eyes softened onto me ever so slightly.
"I don't know how to answer you. I just don't know….." "I know…." I sighed to myself. That hidden grin of his returned. "But what I do know is that I find you humans deeply interesting. I want to learn more from you, Miss Bridgerton. Show me what the world looks like through those lovely eyes of yours." "M-My lord!" Heart pounding for the hundredth time that day, my balled hand rose to it. I did that a lot around him I realized. He chuckled. "We can come out here whenever you like. Just let me know,
I'll come."
Lord Basset! My eyes couldn't look away, I just so in awe. After observing my stunned reaction his face grew serious once more; his eyes sharpening onto mine. "And one more thing, Miss Bridgerton." "Y-Yes?" "In the future you'll obey me without question. Is that understood?" Well, that's a mood-killer. Still, I simply stared at him trying to figure out the meaning behind his words. There was something there but I couldn't tell what it might be just yet. I think I wanted to say "yes" but instead something else came out. My mouth opened and I asked: "Why?" His stare grew even more poignant, if that were possible. "Because it is now my upmost determination to keep you from harm. I want to learn more from you, spend more time with you.
Therefore I have a vested interest in keeping you alive."