"Your bullshitting me." Harry said to the Slytherin first years. "An entire sport flying in the air?"

"Yeah Quidditch is really popular in the magical communities all over the world there's an entire professional league." Draco replies in return to Harry's scoffs.

It was the second Friday of term and the First Years where all going to start learning to fly broomsticks like the kind Harry had seen in that store window in Diagon Alley.

"Welcome to your first Flying lesson." The schools Flight instructor/Quidditch referee greeted the Slytherin and Gryffindor First Years.

She paused and took in Harry's odd manner of dress. Not every teacher had glimpsed the Boy Who Lived's form yet and she paused to admire the diamond eyed skull broach.

"My Dad has one just like it bupt his is red, Papa said the green is supposed to bring out my eyes." Harry said to Madame Hooch. Her eyes resembled an Eagles. There where rumors it was due to a botched animagus potion when she was a student here.

"Well What is everyone waiting for? Stick your right hands over your brooms and say up."

Harry had read up on broom magic and had a working theory that confidence was key with making a broom obey you just like a Horse. Putting his hand over his broom Harry firmly and confidently ordered "Up!" And it leapt I to Harry's hand eagerly. Almost purring at being in his hands.

Draco's took a few tries but after some encouragement from Harry he firmly said "Up!" And the broom jumped into his hand.

Ron Weasleys broom rose into his hand next which made sense as he had several Quidditch players in his family.

Mostly those that rolled around where half blood and muggleborn students like Hermione Granger. An intelligent girl who Harry enjoyed having debates with about the moral ambiguities of his Dads business. Who also asked him about Hell from a curiosity standpoint than a judge mental one which made her okay in his book.

"Look Hermione brooms are enchanted to feel the emotions of their riders. In essence their no different than magical horses." Harry said after walking over to her. "You gotta be confident and firm and...what did you just say to me?" He asked her broom who shook its bristles at him like a rattlesnake. "Oh it is on Bitch by the time I'm done with you Hogwarts will have one less broom!" Harry tackles Hermiones broom and both rolled on the ground as students gathered to watch the spectacle.

"What the hell just happened?" Draco asked Granger watching the bizarre fight between wizard and broomstick. Harry actually had twigs in his hair as he bit it's broom handle making it actually neigh outloud in pain.

"I'm not entirely sure." Hermione said in confusion. "He was telling me to be confident and then it sounded like he heard the broom insult him in some way?"

"That makes way too much sense." Draco said back. "He's very Prideful. I doubt he'd let any insult go even if it was from a broomstick."

"What on Earth is going on here?" Madame Hooch demanded as she came over and Harry held on to the broom as it rose higher and higher. "Come back down this instant!"

"Not until this fucking slut shows the proper respect to a Goetian Prince!" Harry shouted down to Madame Hooch as Professor Snape came rushing outside.

"Immobulous." Snape shouted thrusting his wand in a slashing motion towards Harry and the broom. Both ceased moving and Harry's eyes widened when he saw Snape.

"Accio." Snape said calmly summoning the broom to the ground. "Finite."

Harry fell flat on his ass on the ground.

"Explain yourself."

Both Harry and the broomstick started animatedly explaining their sides. Professor Snape meanwhile being thoroughly confused. "Finite." He said again and the broom returned to normal.

"Don't start what ya can't finish Bitch." Harry spat at the broom that lay in a dormant hover. "The broom insulted my Dad and called him a whore. I said my father is a happily married man and he then said I was a whore child." I had to teach the beast proper respect for the Goetian line otherwise i'd a have to explain to my sisters how I let our dad be insulted by a broomstick!"

"Understandable Mr. Goetia but you still have detention for the weekend."

"FUCK!"

"Want to make it two?"

"What on earth possessed you to fight a broomstick?" Daphne demanded as they walked to dinner.

"He it shouted "Your Fathers a Whore." And I could not let that stand."

Daphne just shook her head as they entered the Great Hall.

The Next Day after dinner Harry replorted to the Dungeons for his detention with his Head Of House.

"You will clean all these cauldrons without magic." Snape ordered.

Not afraid of a little hard work having helped Uncle Boxley with dishes when it was an extreme amount due to some pastry or gathering, Harry grabbed the Magical Mess Remover spray bottle and a rag and got to work.

While cleaning, Professor Snape started reminisce about Lilly Potter, Harry's birth mother.

"A remarkably gifted witch. I swear she could have made a great charms or potions mistress and could very well have taken my place as Potions Master at Hogwarts."

Harry listened to more stories about his mother curiously as he worked. Turned out Professor Snape and his mother had grown up together in the non magical part of Spinners End in Surrey.

"Petunia was always jealous of Lily especially after she got her Hogwarts letter. I checked their home periodically Incase you showed up in their family but gave up after what would have been your 5th birthday. And that's the hour."

Professor Snape spent twenty minutes examining Harry's spotless cauldrons.

"I'll be goddamned" The Potions teacher said. "That's the cleanest I've ever seen these cauldrons their bloody spotless."

"Uncle Boxley our Butler would flay me alive if I left a single spot. I'm not afraid of work Professor, neither is my sister Octavia."

"If it isn't to difficult a task for you and you have no homework to finish...if you come to my classroom and clean cauldrons I will tell you more about your Mother if that is agreeable?"

"Next Saturday it is." Harry agreed, thanking Professor Snape for the stories. He met Draco and Hermione outside.

"We wanted to make sure you got to the Common Room Alright." Hermione Explained.

"What about you?" Harry asked as they walked. Come on Draco we got time we can walk a lady to her common room before curfew."

"I suppose." Draco said and they walked through the corridors together.

On the second floor however, the staircase suddenly moved, it swung to the right. "The staircases change, remember?" Hermione reminded the two.

"Let's get moving." Harry suggested.

"Before the bloody staircase moves again." Draco agreed.

They opened the corridor door to find it completely deserted and bare as if it hadn't been used in a long time.

The third floor corridor on the right hand side is out of bounds for those who don't wish to die a most painful death.

"This is the third floor it's forbidden." Hermione reminded the two.

"Sniff around my sweet. The Weasley brat said he heard of rulebreakers coming here tonight."

"Fuck it's Filch, HIDE your ass!" Harry whispered harshly as they came across a locked door. "Fuck it's locked."

"Alohamora." Hermione said flicking her wand toward the lock. It clicked and the three students pushed their way inside before closing it again just as Filch and a his cat Mrs. Norris turned the corner.

"I swear to fuck I'm gonna steak that cat and feed it to Papas Venusian Man Eaters." Harry hissed.

"He probably thinks the doors still locked."

"It was locked." Hermione said.

"And for a good reason." Harry said suddenly as he looked up hearing a growl.

The three looked up to see an enormous three headed Hellhound. "You pups shouldn't be here."

"You can talk? Wait are you an actual Hellhound?" Harry asked.

"Names Fluffy." The Hellhound greeted the bewildered children. "I like belly rubs."

After rubbing Fluffys Belly for a few minutes as payment for letting them hide until Filch the caretaker left Harry, Draco and Hermione left Fluffy with promises of bones on their next visit."

"Draco remind me to write to Papa telling him someone's running a Hellhound trafficking ring to Earth." Harry ordered the blonde.

"Right. And I'll write to Father asking him about who might be selling Hellhounds.

"Neither Of you use your eyes do you? Didn't you see what Fluffy was standing on?" Hermione asked. "He was standing on a trap door. So he's obviously guarding something."

"Which is why the corridor is forbidden." Harry finished.

"Exactly." Hermione said. "Now I'm going to go slap Ronald Weasley silly for putting us in that situation and go to bed."

"Wait!" Harry pulled out his flintlock. "He'll understand this better. Just return it in the morning." He gave it to Hermione.

"While I normally abhor gun violence I do admit the idea of shooting Ronald is strangely appealing right now." The muggleborn smirked as the Fat Lady portrait entrance to Gryffindor Tower opened.

"We should get goi-"

"Wait for it." Harry interrupted his friend.

They heard a BANG and a yelp.

"That's right Weasley I can get you in your Tower now no where is safe!" Harry shouted through the portrait.

Harry and Draco laughed all the way back to the Slytherin common room.

--

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So yeah Fluffys a Hellhound raised on earth and there's a Hellhound smuggling ring that's gotta be taken care of. No this isn't my big idea that won't be happening until Book 2.