She should have expected this.
Despite the seriousness of their current situation.
Plus, both she and Harry were sporting expressions that made it rather clear that they wished to get this irritating errand over with as quickly as possible.
Her father. Prince Stolas of the highly respected and feared Goetia family, was once again acting like an overly eager child in a candy store.
"Ohh my word. Would you look at that you two. Flying brooms. Oh, I know that it plays into a rather overused stereotype, but that's just so adorable. Do the pair of you desire to buy you one? I know that you don't exactly need one Via, and Harry you're not allowed to have one at school until you're in your second year. But I think it would be simply charming if you had your very own flying broom."
Groaning in embarrassment at her father's overly excited mannerisms, Octavia was pleased that Harry at least had the presence of mind to stay focused on their current task.
"No thank you Master Stolas. It's a generous offer, but I don't really see the point."
Her friend's words causing the human-disguised owl Demon to adopt a frown that was honestly more pathetic than convincing, the lanky teenager voiced her agreement.
"He's right dad. I mean, even if I need to work on my coordination a bit, I can just fly at home. And Harry really won't need a magical toothpick to fly since a) you were gonna teach him how to use magical levitation once he was thirteen. And b) once he grows up a little bit he'll be able to start using his…adopted form."
Smirking at the glare that Harry was currently sending her way for once again pointing out that she was much taller than him, Octavia quickly turned her attention back to her dad.
"Oh, I suppose you're right dear. Besides now that I think of it, it might be best to wait a year or two before making a purchase of this nature. The use of numbering in the current model suggests that it's only meant to be on the market until its more finely tuned successor makes its appearance. Now enough dawdling. Sadly we still have to make a quick stop before we start shopping. And since we've arrived later than I intended…"
"Because you and Mom were 'playing' with the Imp again."
Enjoying the way her father's face turned slightly pink at being found out, though she was a tad disgusted when she saw it morph into one of eager anticipation, the teenaged owl Demon wisely held her tongue as her dad regained his composure.
"Ye...Yes well, at any rate. Due to the lateness of the hour, we must first make a stop at the bank to obtain the proper currency. A shame that British wizarding currency is hard to come by back home, but thankfully such a shortage is easy to remedy once we get to the bank. Now Harry, do you remember what you learned about the Goblin race?"
She couldn't help it.
Harry's answer was enough to make her abandon her public mask of disinterest in favor of one of giggling amusement.
"You mean how they're living proof that the wizarding world is anti-Semitic?"
Her father of course was confused by this answer.
"N..no. How on earth did you come up with that idea?"
Watching Harry hold up his hand, Octavia found herself nodding her head in agreement each time he lowered a finger to explain each and every observation.
"Well first off, the ministry has pretty much made it impossible for them to practice any other type of business that isn't related to the holding and acquisition of funds. They have noses that are pretty similar to the more vicious Jewish stereotypes, like those stupid drawings those Nazis in Chicago had. And they're literally obsessed with gold. I know that the magical world is behind the times, but surely even they can see the similarities."
Laughing at both Harry's rather accurate observation and her father's thoughtful expression, the teenaged owl Demon decided to voice her own opinion regarding the Wizarding World's…structure.
"From what I've read Harry, the lazier a society is the more racial discrimination there will be. A separate race for handling and storing their money. An entire species will literally end up dying if they are freed from servitude. And declining birth rates and talent amongst the elite because they decide to 'keep it in the family' instead of welcoming new blood. Frankly, I'm amazed that they haven't driven themselves to extinction by now what with the inbreeding and their constant civil wars."
Earning a nod of agreement from both Harry and her father, though in the latter's case it was more reluctant since he obviously wanted to enjoy the thrill of experiencing a culture he hadn't visited in at least a century, Octavia quickly fell back into her uninterested mood as her father stated the answer he had originally been hoping for.
"Well, yes I suppose both of you are correct to a certain degree. However Harry that is NOT what I was getting at. You must always show respect to a Goblin, but NEVER weakness. And, it is important to remember that any debt, no matter how small, will never be forgiven or forgotten until it is paid. There was also something else, but sadly for the life of me, I can't recall what it wa…Oh yes, now I remember! When beginning or ending a conversation with them, it is always best to use a bit of violence in your language. A shame that Blitzy or your mother isn't here, but since they lack the means to adequately disguise themselves, I shall do my best."
Having the opposite opinion in regards to the presence of her parents' lover, if only because he seemed like the last person you would want in a bank filled with greedy and violent employees, Octavia held her tongue as they finally entered the snow-white building.
….
Though his countenance was as professional as he could make it considering the audacity of the three…creatures in front of him, Gringotts teller Stoneclaw couldn't help but want to smirk as he addressed the taller of the false humans before him.
"Yes? May I help you?"
Expecting the tall pale-faced being to request either a meeting with one of their more…secretive agents to discuss either a business transaction that the Ministry wouldn't approve of, personally he was kind of hoping that it would be the first steps in a new war against the wand hoarders, the bespectacled Goblin was disappointed by the request.
Even if it was being made in the manner that most humans would never think to emulate.
"Greetings master Goblin. May your enemies suffer from incurable ailments, and may their wealth be used to fill your coffers. I have come to enquire about opening a new account."
Slightly inclining his head forward in respect, for unlike most humans these individuals knew how to give a proper greeting when conducting business with the Goblin Nation, Stoneclaw returned it with the proper reply before getting down to business.
"And may yours find themselves destitute while you profit from their misfortune. And opening an account requires a small fee of two Galleons. Or ten Muggle pounds if your kind prefers to use a different form of currency."
While the two older creatures kept their expressions blank as they nodded at this piece of information, the youngest member of the trio couldn't help the look of surprise that passed across his face.
"You…know about.."
"About the fact that you and your party are not what you appear to be? Glamours might work on humans boy, but Goblins have always been blessed with far superior senses. Though I will admit that the ones you three are using are much better than some of the methods used by those employed by the Ministry."
Smirking a little at the lad's look of embarrassment, Stoneclaw found his attention switching back to the much taller and thinner male.
"I…see. Hopefully our…status won't prevent us from completing this transaction though. We have a lot of shopping to do today. And sadly we need the correct currency to do it."
At this, the Goblin could only nod his head in agreement at this declaration.
"That you do. And of course, unlike the majority of our customers, you recognize the importance of laying the potential groundwork for establishing an amicable relationship with Gringotts. I wish humans possessed such intelligence. If they did, we might be more willing to tolerate their more….distasteful practices."
His thoughts momentarily souring at the Human concept of ownership, though such thoughts were lessened by the looks of understanding that were on the faces of the oldest human-shaped creature and his fellow male, the slim female was not worth his attention due to her inability to hide her bored expression, Stoneclaw reached into his desk to pull out the necessary paperwork to create a new account.
Of course with the bank being run by Goblins, most of the basic details had already been filled out.
Apart from one minor, yet crucial step that helped to ensure that Gringotts' reputation as the most secure banking system in the world.
Pushing both the document and the red quill forward, Stoneclaw gestured towards the bottom of the document.
"Now, as the owner of this account, you just need to sign your name on the dotted line, and only you, and whoever you designate as your proxy, will be allowed access to your vault. I trust you have the minimum deposit with you?"
Receiving a nod from the tall aristocratic-looking customer, the Goblin couldn't help but frown at having his assumption corrected.
"I do, but the account is not for me, it's for my young charge here."
Glaring a little at this piece of information, Stoneclaw did his best to recover from this minor error.
"I…see. Well so long as the fee has been paid, he merely needs to sign this form, and he will have an account with us."
Taking sadistic enjoyment as he watched the dark-haired child reach for the quill that had been enchanted to use his blood for ink, the Goblin's smirk quickly morphed into a frown as he noticed that not only was his fun being denied but that the name that was being put on the document was not something he had expected.
And while Gringotts prided itself on its ability to ensure that there was no way a non-Goblin could cheat the bank, he still had to make sure.
"Are you certain that this is your name boy? Because if it is, I'm afraid that we will have a problem."
Though the younger members of the trio tensed at this information, with the lanky female slowly maneuvering herself to ensure that the boy would have a place to hide should he choose, it was currently frowning adult that possessed the wit to never show fear during a transaction with a Gringotts' employee.
"And why is that my good Goblin?"
The look Stoneclaw gave him was less than amused.
"Because now we will have to begin the process of opening another account for young Mr. Pot.."
"Waitwaitwaitwait. I already have an account here?"
His frown deepening at this interruption, though it had more to do with the boy's obvious lack of knowledge than a lapse in manners, Stoneclaw slowly nodded his head.
"Indeed you do boy. A small savings account that had been established by your parents, who had also seen it wise to ensure that its total amount grew by two percent each year on your birthday. The fact that you are unaware of its existence is most troubling."
Which was putting it lightly considering the identity of the boy's magical guardian. Thankfully, his current chaperone was intelligent enough to ask the type of questions one wouldn't normally expect from an eleven-year-old.
"Was…this account in use during the past eleven years? Or has it remained inactive?"
Taking a moment to rummage through his magically expanded cabinet to pull out the correct file, it only took Stoneclaw a brief moment to find the relevant information.
"According to our records, two withdrawals had been made since your parents' death Mr. Potter. The first went towards the creation of a memorial in the village where you defeated the Dark Lord. While another slightly larger amount was given to your mother's sister."
Upon seeing the boy's reaction to this piece of information, the Goblin expressed a silent prayer of gratitude that he was currently wearing one of the more powerful appearance-changing enchantments. For he was certain that if that had not been the case, the boy's transformed state would have given him quite the powerup when it came to magically induced tantrums.
Luckily, the female's quick thinking in placing a hand on his shoulder to show her support was enough to prevent the type of destruction that would force the bank to close its doors for a day's worth of cleaning.
Though it wasn't enough to completely rid him of his justified anger.
"What?"
Ignoring the sudden increase in temperature that came with this question, though he had honestly thought that it would have gotten colder considering the nature of his…transformation, Stoneclaw answered the question.
"It says here that the equivalent of one thousand muggle pounds was transferred into the account of one Petunia Dursley roughly ten years ago, with the stipulation that it would only be used for child care purposes."
If anything this only served to increase the feeling that he was now standing near a growing fire. Which was why it was a good thing that the lanky female gave him a way to avoid having his precious desk ornaments melt.
"Who else knows about this?"
Despite the situation, Stoneclaw was slightly insulted at the question.
If only because it cast doubt on the confidentiality of the Bank.
"Only Gringotts and Mr. Potter's former magical guardian. The latter of whom is responsible for approving the transfers in the first place."
Discreetly moving his finger to ensure that it was close to the panic button that every bank teller had installed, the Goblin was glad that the last Potter was being accompanied by someone of intelligence.
"In regards to the status of this former guardian, I trust that your records reveal not only when he lost this privilege, but also if he has tried to access Harry's vault since that time."
At that question, Stoneclaw could only grin.
"Indeed we do. Loss of guardianship appeared to have occurred roughly three years ago. But there have been no further attempts to access your vault, so it is unlikely that your original guardian was aware of this."
This news ensured that the temperature surrounding the last surviving Potter dropped from near scorching to normal.
"Well…that's good I guess"
At this Stoneclaw could only nod his head in agreement.
"Indeed. While he is more… open-minded than most humans, Albus Dumbledore is not without his faults."
Upon hearing this, the pale-skinned lanky female once again interjected.
"Waitwaitwait. You're telling me that Harry's former guardian is the principal of a magical high school?"
Laughing at that rather amusing, if somewhat basic definition of Dumbledore's role in Wizarding Britain, Stoneclaw nodded his head.
"The proper term is headmaster, but essentially you are correct. Even if he does enjoy some political positions, he is first and foremost an administrator for one particular center of education. But you needn't worry Mr. Potter. The firm that revoked his guardianship has not only ensured that he cannot reattain it, but also that he will be made unaware of it until he needs to make use of it. A rather insidious setup that is worthy of any Goblin I must say. But then what else would you expect from the legal teams of the Apple Garden corporation."
This piece of news caused each of the transformed beings to sport different expressions.
The adult male wore a look that indicated that he should have expected this piece of information.
The boy's expression was torn between amusement and disbelief.
The female on the other hand just looked bored.
"Considering the amount of legal counsel that particular CEO has it's not surprising. Anyways we are getting off track. How much money is in the account?"
Having expected such a question to be asked, even if the girl didn't really give the same vibe that some females got when their male companions were about to be informed of their wealth, Stoneclaw answered the question.
"Currently it stands at 52,450 galleons, 72,123 sickles, and 15234 knuts. Which if converted to current Muggle currency comes to around…277,352 pounds."
Though he enjoyed the look of shock that was currently being worn by the boy and female, though the latter's expression was far less exaggerated than her shorter companion's, it was the red-eyed being that proved that some creatures were able to keep their heads when greeted with sudden wealth.
"A tidy little sum if I do say so. However, I do trust that you will use this money responsibly, Harry. Even if your…perceptions of your birth parents is currently somewhat negative, the money they left you can be used to improve the overall situation of both yourself and your family."
Wisely choosing not to comment, if only because Goblin's only cared about the personal lives of their clients IF they were experiencing difficulties in clearing their debts, Stoneclaw decided to get to the more practical matters of vault ownership.
"Splendid. Now, if you will just come with me, I will not only take you to your vault but also to our master locksmith. For since the guardianship has changed, a new key must be fashioned. For security purposes you understand."
Receiving an accepting nod from the trio, the Goblin gestured for them to follow him to the chamber where they would be able to operate a cart to take them to the lower levels.
He briefly wondered whether or not the female and the taller one would enjoy the ride, or react like that half Giant when he had been in to remove that rather valuable item.
Hopefully, the experience would be more pleasant than the latter because while his position afforded him several privileges, chief among them being that he didn't have to clean the vault carts, that still didn't prevent him from being covered in vomit.
One could only hope.
….
Although he knew Stolas and Via were shooting him looks that easily conveyed their amusement with his current situation, Harry continued to happily hum in a manner that strongly reminded both owl Demons of a certain Imp.
Though it was his smirking friend who decided to point this out.
"I can't believe you did that. I mean, I know you're a lot more mature than him. But that moved you pulled down there was pure Blitzo."
Upon hearing this Stolas could only laugh before he moved to chide his teasing daughter.
"Now now Via. Let's not tease the boy too much. Though I have to confess that if presented with the same opportunity, Blitzy would have dived right in as you did. Although I am unsure if he would have the proper foresight to enchant the mounds of treasure like you did. Which I must say was a rather ingenious use of the molecular alteration spell I taught you. If you didn't, I would suspect that even a young dragon Demon would find it unpleasant to dive headfirst into a pile of solid treasure."
Momentarily grinning at the recent memory of swimming through HIS piles of gold and silver, Harry quickly sported a pout as Via agreed with her father.
"You've got a point dad. I have no idea who came up with the concept of swimming in gold. But I have to admit that it is rather amusing to watch IF you're able to break the laws of physics."
Upon hearing this Harry could only smile with mild embarrassment. For while it was fun to do, he did steal the concept from a cartoon he had once seen on the Dursleys' telly.
Thankfully however Stolas decided to take pity on him.
"Indeed Via, indeed. Now. Since we have now procured the correct funds for this little venture and the fact that we are slightly behind schedule, why don't we split up? I will head to that charming little book shop we passed by earlier for Harry's reading materials. While the two of you head off to the tailor's. We already have everything else on this list back home, so as soon as we're done, we can be off."
Both youths nodding their heads in agreement with this reasoning, knowing full well that if they did attract unwanted attention they were more than capable of holding their own until Stolas arrived to bail them out, Harry and Via made their way over to a shop that would have never survived its first week if it had been based back home.
For one, there was a distinct lack of security around the premises. Ensuring that anyone with enough daring or skill could simply take what they wanted.
And secondly, unlike the citizens of Hell, the most notable being a style cannibal who was on rather good terms with the Radio Demon, the owner of the shop lacked the same type of aura that would convince her patrons to treat her as a credible threat to their well being.
"Hogwarts to dear? Well, you're in luck. We have one spot available at the moment. So if you would like to give your sister your things, we can get started."
Smirking as he proceeded to give an understandably irritated Via his things, for even if she didn't like her mother's etiquette lessons she still believed that it was the man's place to serve as a bag carrier rather than the other way around, Harry walks to the fitting area.
Barely paying attention to the pale blond kid who was also getting his own set of robes.
But while Harry was content to pass the time in silence, the other boy was not.
"Hello. Hogwarts too?"
For a brief moment, Harry considered which of the numerous lessons in social interactions he should take.
The blonde's aristocratic bearing ensured that his mother's advice on being openly cheerful would not work in this sort of situation.
Nor would it be a good idea to be as blunt as Loona and Via, or as polite as his father.
The only option that was even remotely viable was Stella's instructions on proper etiquette between nobles.
But something about the kid ensured that he combined the owl Demoness's lessons with what he picked up by watching his friends interact with each other.
"Well considering I'm eleven years old, and about to be fitted for a set of custom robes, no I'm here for something else entirely."
Fighting the urge to smirk as he watched blondie stupidly nod his head before realizing that he was being sarcastic, Harry was somewhat surprised by the kid's recovery.
"Indeed. And was this your first stop? Or perhaps your last?"
Managing to contain a scoff at the kid's rather obvious attempt to act like a mature adult, the former Potter decided to go with an answer that, while honest, was nevertheless lacking in detail.
"The last. You think I want to spend another minute in those crowds?"
While his pale-faced companion agreed with his comment, it was clear that it was because of reasons far different than his own.
"True. It is rather distasteful to walk the streets these days what with increasing numbers of…newcomers. I trust that like mine your parents have raised you to identify those who are deemed worthy of association?"
Deciding it was probably best not to reveal that his parents would probably classify the blond ferret as 'unworthy of association', if only because Stella had taught him to always keep his mouth shut while a future enemy was unknowingly providing him the means to put them in their place, Harry just gave a simple nod to the question.
Trusting that the other boy would view it as agreeing with his own viewpoint.
And he was right.
"Good. My father is always going on how the influence of blood traitors and their ilk is sadly increasing every year. But it is nice to see that there are still those who honor our traditional ways. May I ask what your parents do for a living? My father is not only a member of Hogwarts' board of governors but also enjoys a rather important position within the Ministry. And my mother is involved with several organizations that are dedicated to...preserving our traditional values."
Humming in appreciation at this intel, if only because it could further develop Blizo's latest scheme to draw in more business, Harry carefully worded his answer in a manner that was both uninformative and yet truthful.
"Well, how should I put this? My parents work for a company that specializes in making problems go away for their clients."
To his mild surprise, the stuck-up kid actually managed to correctly guess what Harry was referring to.
"I…see. Well if the nature of that business is what I think it is, I'm certain my father is aware of it considering his influence."
Upon hearing this Harry could only smirk.
"Doubtful. They only accept business from certain clients. And while I am sure your father is a…discreet man, I think it's safe to say that he has a few years ahead of him before he has a chance to hire my parents."
Doing his best not to snicker at the displeased look that was currently being worn by the prepubescent snob, Harry quickly sported a similar look as the blonde decided to change the topic.
"Any idea of what house you'll be in once we reach Hogwarts? Of course, nobody really knows which house they'll be placed in, but I'm confident that I will follow my family's footsteps by being placed in Slytherin."
Having been informed of the Four Houses thanks to a rather informative, if insulting, pamphlet that had been provided by Lucifer himself, Harry didn't really have much of a positive opinion regarding Hogwarts's methods of social segregation.
Something which he was willing to share.
"I actually have no idea. The house of the lions sounds more like the house of the idiots. Hufflepuff is a no-go cause I doubt I'd feel loyalty to anyone who wasn't my family. Ravenclaw is the house of nerds. And Slytherin…"
Seeing the developing frown that was currently displayed on the blond's face, and know that both his dad and Stella would admonish him if they learned that he made the first move in making an enemy, Harry decides to use a half-truth.
"Honestly I don't think I have the patience for being one. Also kind of limits your social circle to just that house, and maybe the ravens. Unless of course people have started to buy into that whole 'let's all work together' spiel the headmaster keeps spouting."
Though the other kid's expression seemed to be an odd mixture of amusement and disapproval, Harry was nevertheless pleased when he received a nod of acceptance.
"I suppose you will have to see once we get there. Though you'll come to find that while it's important to know as many people as possible, having the RIGHT people as your closest allies is more important. And I'll have you know that the Mal…"
"All done deary."
Fighting the urge to snicker at the blond's expression at being interrupted by their squat, but nevertheless friendly-looking seamstress, Harry managed to keep his eyes from rolling as he watched the kid's rather clumsy attempt to appear more mature than he actually was.
"I suppose I shall be seeing you at Hogwarts."
Despite giving him a nod of acknowledgment, privately Harry was thinking that the next few years were gonna suck if all of his new classmates were as conceited and racist as the one that had just left.
He didn't think they would all be that bad.
But if they were, he had all sorts of ideas he could use to ensure that no one would want to mess with him.
….
Despite the fact that he was currently sporting a human disguise, one of the many perks that came with being the boyfriend/sex toy of two upper-class Demons, Blitzo still lacked the vital quality that would have allowed him to effortlessly blend in with his surroundings.
To NOT act like he should be the center of attention.
Yes, he understood that their little family trip topside was in honor of the kid's trip to boarding school.
But the fact remained that whenever Blitzo saw something that he thought was stupid, he had to ensure that everyone around him knew about it.
"Sooo let me get this straight. Instead of using magic to teleport from one place to another, or even dropping their children off at the front gate, Wizards choose to load up their children on some magical train without any adult supervision or security. Am I the only one who thinks that's fucked up?"
As always, his question managed to get a mixed range of reactions from the other members of his company.
Loona, back in her human disguise albeit wearing something that thankfully showed far less skin, merely shook her head to show that she agreed with his opinion.
The Kid merely snorted to show his opinion regarding the society with which he was being forced to reconnect.
Millie of course wasn't really paying attention to anything he said since she was in full sentinel mode. Though thankfully she was keeping the semi-automatics out of sight until they were needed.
And Moxxie? Well, Moxxie just had to try and put a positive spin on everything.
"Well…I mean it is a bit weird since it forces them to rely on technology to travel from place to place. But personally I think it's…"
"Shut the fuck up Moxxie. Nobody cares."
Shooting his bored-looking daughter a grateful smile since he couldn't have put it better himself, Blitzo quickly sported a bit of a pout as it was once again proven that the white-haired Imp could count on more than just his wife for emotional support.
"Actually I do. And so does Mom, even if she's currently in 'sentry mode'."
While Moxxie flashed his son a grateful smile, Loona merely smirked as she pointed out the probable cause for Harry's loyalty.
"You're just saying that cause you actually have to board this fucking thing. I mean, yeah you're packing some serious heat if anybody tries to mess with you. But you're still gonna be stuck on a train for hours with nothing but prepubes and teenagers for the rest of the day. Which means that you will latch onto anything that could make the journey more bearable."
Unsure if he should smile or frown at the less than friendly look Harry was shooting the still smirking Hellhound, Blitzo found himself rolling his eyes as Moxxie once again tried to put a positive spin on his son's unnecessary journey.
"I'm sure it won't be that bad kiddo. Just remember what your mother and I told you."
The kid's answer of course revealed that while Moxxie had done his best to raise the kid, Millie and the other Demons in his life had done their best to ensure that he wasn't the whiny pushover that his father was.
"You mean always shoot in areas that guarantee an instant kill or a cripple?"
Laughing at Moxxie's stunned expression, though he had to give the kid props for remembering the first rule about firing a weapon, Blitzo was prevented from offering up his own comment thanks to Mille.
"Not quite sweetie. Though I am happy to see that you're prepared to do what is necessary should anyone give you trouble."
Rolling his eyes at the beaming expression that was currently on the kid's face, though oddly enough it reminded him of Loona when she was still in that cute puppy phase of hers, the former circus performer could only scoff as Moxxie proceeded to temper the kid's instincts.
"But ONLY if you see no other option. You're not in Hell anymore. And violence is something that is only used as a last resort."
"Or when it's fun."
Smirking at the displeased look his fellow transformed Imp was sending him, and the way the kid was desperately trying not to agree with his comment, Blitzo was once again reminded that there was a reason why he preferred Millie's parenting style.
Even if she did disapprove of his interference.
"Ignore Blitzo Sweetie. However, if you do feel the need to vent your more…physical emotions, remember what your granddaddy said."
Frowning at the fact that the Double Ms continued to block his efforts to join their family's visits to the Ring of Wrath, though he was sure that given enough time he could eventually convince them to let him tag along, Blitzo found himself nodding his head as Harry recited something that was a minor variation of what he had told Loona when she was having problems in kindergarten.
"It's not what you do, but when and where you do it, and who you do it with. Because if nobody sees it, it didn't happen."
The kid's answer earned him an affectionate tussle of his hair before Millie opened her arms wide.
"Good boy. Now give your momma and daddy a hug before you get on that train."
Though feeling a little jealous as he watched the human-looking dragon Demon hug his parents without hesitation, Blitzo nevertheless extended his hand outward in a genuine gesture of farewell.
"See you in a few days kiddo. And remember what I told you about collecting names. If this backward society is still recovering from some sort of civil war, chances are that some of the remaining major players, or even the minor ones, would fetch a nice commission back home. And if you manage to find one good enough to start a bidding war, I promise to split the profits with you 80/20."
His words causing both Moxxie and Millie to glare at him, the founder of I.M.P. acted as he usually did whenever his inappropriate behavior got noticed.
Used logic that only made sense to those who didn't give a shit about morals.
"What? It's not like he needs the money anymore what with his new bank account and access to human goods. If anything, I should be taking a greater cut since he just has to talk to some snot-nosed humans about what their parents did during the war."
Or find some non-revisionist history book that had no problem listing both the victims and criminals of the past conflict. But he would wait until later until conveying that thought.
For now, he had more pressing concerns since the kid, after having the maturity to shake his hand without questioning it like his wuss of a father, was now looking at Loona with an expected look.
And it took all of Blitzo's self-control not to react as his daughter, while wearing an expression of disinterest, opened her arms in a welcoming gesture.
"Don't view this as a regular thing kid. If you wanna be a badass, displays of affection have got to be few and far between.."
Frowning as the kid quickly cut his daughter off with a hug, which was met with a smile and an awkward, but no less affectionate pat on the back,
Surprisingly enough, he gave them five seconds to enjoy their heartwarming moment before acting like he always did when he saw a boy being friendly with his precious Looney Tuney.
"Okay okay break it up you two. Anything longer than five seconds and I start making sure that Moxxie will never be a granddaddy."
While glad to see that the kid was still unable to fully understand what he was talking about, and the fact that Loona's glare was one of irritated embarrassment for assuming she had such an interest, he knew she would have been more violent if she had more than hugs on her mind, the reactions of the double Ms was a bit more intimidating.
Moxxie of course could be safely ignored since he rarely carried out his threats.
But Millie?
That was a different story.
"You even think about it Boss, and I will mess you up to the point where even Prince Stolas won't wanna touch you."
Gulping in understandable terror at that threat, for he knew that the female Imp would have to get really creative before making his perfect body repulsive to the perverted dick bird that was sort of his boyfriend, Blitzo had to fight to keep himself from crying in relief as Loona came to his rescue.
"Much as I enjoy seeing Blitzo get threatened with bodily harm, SOMEONE should be getting on his train if he wants to ensure that he gets a seat without having to ask permission for it."
Quickly nodding his head in agreement, and feeling just a touch concerned when he noticed that the Double Ms were copying him, albeit in a much more depressed fashion, Blitzo wisely remained silent as he watched the kid give his parents one last hug before getting on the train.
It was odd how touching this moment was despite the plans to ensure that the kid would be able to come home on weekends, but as a parent himself, he knew how emotional goodbyes, even temporary ones, could be.
…..
While the Hogwarts Express always earned a wide range of emotions from it's newest passengers, usually excitement mixed in with a bit of homesickness and worry, this was the first time in decades that it ever been ridden by a eleven year old passenger who felt nothing but annoyance and anger towards what the journey represented.
It didn't matter that he had successfully managed to find an empty compartment, and then covered it in basic warding so that only the most desperate would intrude on his solutited.
Nor did it matter that he had found a method to enjoy all the sorts of things muggle raised children would miss once they realized that magic and technology didn't exactly mesh well together.
The fact remained that he was still on a slow train going to a place he didn't want to go to.
Still, he supposed it could be worse.
Thanks to Stolas helping him with his human disguise, both in terms of training to do it himself and the magic ring that would provided the necessary juice to maintain it without dipping into his own magical reserves, he didn't have to worry about any racist or narrow minded prick calling him a monster.
And most importantly, he didn't have to…
"Uhh, excuse me."
Pulled out of his musings by the sudden interruption, some gangly preteen with orange hair, freckles, and clothing that bore a homemade quality to them, Harry tried to ignore him.
But sadly that didn't work out too well.
"EXCUSE ME!"
Offering a mild glare to the slightly flushed carrot top, and remembering both his mom's and Stella's advice regarding how to make friends and identify enemies, Harry merely gave a one worded response to this outburst.
"What?"
Though his blunt question caused the carrot top to once again prove that gingers were terrible at concealing their embarrassment, he had to admit that his ability to keep moving forward was almost admirable.
"Do you mind? Everywhere else is full."
Frowning, Harry didn't even try to keep the skepticism out of his voice.
"You're telling me that every single compartment on this is full except this one? I thought the whole point of a magical transit system was to ensure that there were enough seats for everybody."
Once again earning an angry flush from his unwanted visitor, Harry had to admit that he expected some sort of angry comeback instead of an honest answer.
"Well, okay, maybe not every compartment is full. But my brothers basically kicked me out of theirs. A lot of the older students don't wanna associate with 'firsties'. And some of the ones that do will make fun of you if your aiming to be in a certain house."
Though admiring the kid's honesty, the only reaction the Hell adopted Wizard gave was an eyebrow raise.
"And I take it that they didn't want to be in the same house as you?"
Receiving a nod, the orange haired kid proceeded to puff up with pride.
"Mhmm. Gryffindor is the best house at Hogwarts. And.."
"Why?"
Uncaring of the look of shocked confusion that was currently being worn by his unwanted visitor, Harry continued with his questioning.
"Why is it the best house? Are the accommodations better? Are your career prospects going to be better because your part of that particular fraternity? Honestly from what I've read, the House of the Brave seems kind of overrated."
Enjoying the less then pleased expression that was currently being worn by the ginger kid, though it was somewhat lessened by the fact that Loona and Via weren't there to witness his sick put down skills, Harry waited for the kid to answer his question.
Only to be interrupted by another unwanted annoyance.
"Well, its nice to see that despite your apparent association with a Weasley, you're still smart enough to recognize that Gryffindor is not as great at it believes it is. Not sure if that cunning is enough to land you a spot in Slytherin, but I suppose it is sufficient for a more…sensible Ravenclaw."
Fighting the urge to groan as he was once again graced with the unwanted presence of the blonde racist, Harry was momentarily caught off guard by the appearance of the two other boys who matched up pretty well to the standard definition of 'dumb muscle'.
Of course the blond kid interrupted his look of shock as showing interest.
"This is Crabbe. And that's Goyle. Don't expect them to say very much. They come from respectable families, but great conversationists they are not."
Noticing, but not really caring that his first intruder was clenching his fists, Harry adopted the same tone that he had heard Stella adopt many times whenever she wasn't angry.
"And I suppose that you are?"
His question earned him a nod.
"But of course. As the heir to the most Ancient and Noble House of Malfoy, I am not only blessed with a lineage that has never seen the taint of the Muggle, but also with the intelligence to understand that some families are better than others."
While he was unimpressed with this boasting, if only because it was far less funny than Blitzo's, or overly dramatic like a certain snake Demon with an affinity for steampunk and eggs, it was the orange haired kid who mocked this declaration.
"That's a pile of dragon dung.. My dad told me all about the so-called noble house of Malfoy. And from what he told me, your dad's nothing more than a cold blooded murderer who bribed his way out of prison."
Frowning in mild distaste at this comment, for he highly doubted that Malfoy Sr's reasons for killing people had little to do with providing for his family, or warding off potential threats, the disguised dragon Demon decided to keep his mouth shut as he bore witness to something that Blitzo might find interesting.
"And my father told me all about the Weasley clan. A bunch of Muggle loving fools who have more children than they can afford."
Sighing as he watched his previously peaceful compartment turn into a soon to be battleground, for even if they were only eleven he had to assume that since they were both raised in magical households they had some idea of how to fight each other, Harry decided to step in.
But it was clear that he wasn't doing it for noble purposes.
"If you want to have a pissing match, please do it somewhere else. I mean don't get me wrong, I love a good fight as much as the next kid. But I honestly don't have the patience to deal with the mess once Weasley is on the ground lying in a puddle of his own blood."
Of course rather than forcing the two opposing sides to go elsewhere, his comment merely caused Welsey, or was it Weasel?, to sport a look of betrayal on his freckled face while the blond kid merely smirked.
"What the hell makes you think I'll lose? Also why aren't you gonna help me?"
Doing his best not to scoff at that rather stupid question, Harry nevertheless answered the question with the same sort of bluntness Loona used whenever his dad questioned why she never did her job properly.
"Lets see. For starters you're outnumbered three to one, and that wand of yours has clearly seen better days. Secondly, I don't really have a reason to intervene. I mean, sure blondie and his goons are a few generations away from playing the banjo all day in some red neck swamp, but he hasn't done anything to make ME want to deal with him. Maybe insult him a little, but nothing that would result in him needing to go to the hospital."
Shockingly, his answer proved to piss off both the freckled kid and the blondie.
"Is that so? And what makes you think that you'll ever get a chance to do so? Mudblood"
Even if Weasel wasn't sporting a more anger filled glare, Harry nevertheless would have known that he had just been insulted with the magical world's version of the 'N' word.
However since he had received a proper education at the hands of one of Hell's most prominent families, he was able to respond in a manner that would not only make his dad proud, but also earn the approval of his harshest teacher.
"The fact that you resort to racial insults just proves that you're not worth my time. I mean, if you had more than two brain cells to rub together, you would first ask what my name was, something that neither you or carrot top have done, and then use your knowledge of my family to either insult me OR try and get in my good graces. Not that the latter would help you since I love my adopted family a hell of a lot better than the ones who lost their lives to the Dark Wanker, but the attempt could have been made."
He wasn't sure which was funnier.
The fact that the freckled kid was uncertain if he wanted to remain angry or laugh, or the fact that blondie was acting like Stella did before she had gotten used to Blitzo's presence in her home.
Though unlike the female owl Demon, blondie managed to keep his voice at an even volume.
"I see. And not that I care anymore, since you've made it rather obvious that your parents were best nothing more than a couple of blood traitors, but what is your name? If we're going to be spending the next seven years together, I want to remember the loser who thought that…"
"For fucks sakes do you ever shut up? My name is Harry Daemon. But up until 4 years ago, my name was Harry Potter."
Loath as he was to be reminded of his connection to the two angels who had yet to give up on their quest to make him abandon his TRUE family, not to mention the lame ass family name that Lucifer had saddled him with for legal purposes since Imps didn't really have last names, Harry had to admit that the reaction of the two boys was amusing.
Even if Malfoy's expression quickly changed from surprise to one of derision.
"Is that so? Well despite finding someone as pathetic as your birth parents to take you in, that still doesn't mean that…
He couldn't help it. He just couldn't help it.
It was one thing to insult him, as well as his incubator and sperm donor.
But to hear this inbred idiot insult his parents. That was quite another.
So with the speed that could only come from three years of training with assassins, and other equally violent Demons, Harry quickly pulled out one of his non lethal weapons, and fired it at the still ranting blond.
The sound he made wasn't quite as shrill as it would have been if he had used a gun, or even some of the 'skills' he had been advised to keep on the down low unless he truly needed them.
But Harry had to confess that watching the blond's current predicament was rather amusing to watch.
Even Weasel thought so. Even if he didn't really understand what just happened.
"What the bloody hell was that?"
Since he was in a good mood, Harry answered the question with none of the snark he had picked up when hanging around Loona.
"This a modified taser. Won't leave any permanent damage, but it will ensure that he's gonna be a twitching mess until we get to the castle. Speaking of which, Thug One and Thug Two. Mind taking your fearless leader elsewhere? I think he might have soiled himself."
Ignoring the duo that all but proved that humanity was descended from apes, though from what he learned from Stolas it had less to do with natural evolution and more to do with God deciding to experiment with some prime mates, Harry turned towards his remaining companion with a threatening look in his eyes.
"I hope that I don't need to tell you NOT to piss me off?"
Surprisingly, despite the signs that the kid wasn't gonna make a great scholar, his survival instincts were nevertheless well developed.
"Ye…yeah I get it. I'm Ron by the way."
Briefly shaking the outstretched hand, if only for politeness sake, Harry released a slightly annoyed sigh as Ron failed to recognize his desire for silence.
"What's a taser? Is that a Muggle weapon? Always though my dad was a bit…crazy to admire Muggles so much. But if they have stuff like this then maybe…."
Doing his best to ignore the constant chattering of the now excited ginger, the disguised dragon Demon moved to establish his clearly underpowered privacy wards.
Only to be interrupted by yet another unwanted visitor.
"Excuse me! But have you two seen a…. What on earth is that smell!?"
Taking a brief sniff, and grimacing as he picked up the slight stench that would have gone largely unnoticed if he was back in Imp city, Harry decided to be as blunt as possible.
"That is the lingering remnants of a narrow minded prick getting what he deserved. Though I suppose that there is no point in allowing it to linger."
Flicking his wand with a shooing motion, the compartment was instantly cleared of the faint smell of piss. Causing Ron to shoot him a look of gratitude, and the bushy haired beaver girl to look at him with both wonder, and more than a little jealousy.
"How did you do that?"
Tucking away his wand back into his sleeve, Harry smirked at her as he gave what should have been an obvious answer.
"Magic."
His answer of course earned snickers from Ron, and a disproving glare from the girl.
"Yes I got that but HOW did you do it? I've read all our school texts for the coming year. As well as some background reading for the next year or two. But every spell I read about requires it to be spoken aloud with specific hand motions. But you didn't say anything. So how did you do it?"
He was going to dismiss the question, but Harry took a closer look at her expression and felt a small stab of pity.
If only because the eager look on her face vaguely reminded him of his own schooling experience before the Dursleys made it clear that he was not to outshine his retarded whale of a cousin.
"A lot of training, experimentation, and proper motivation."
He could tell from the look on her face that his answer still displeased her. But thankfully she seemed to sense that she wouldn't get a better response. So she changed the subject.
"I…see. Well anyway, I just came in to ask if either of you have seen a toad? A boy named Neville's lost one."
Shaking his head, a move that was copied by Ron, Harry was unsurprised by the huff of annoyance that came from the girl.
"No? Shame then. Guess I'll have to look elsewhere."
Despite her attitude, and the fact that it would probably wouldn't work, Harry decided to be helpful.
Though in retrospect his dad was better at these sorts of things than he was.
"You're a new blood aren't you?"
His question earning a confused look from both the Ginger and the bushy haired girl, the disguised Demon was pleased that her confusion didn't prevent her from asking questions.
"Newblood? Do you mean Muggleborn?"
Nodding his head, Harry explained his decision to use that particular term when there was already a more traditional one available.
"Yeah I did. However since the politically correct term is too close to the magical equivalent of another racial slur, I decided to come up with something new."
While his explanation didn't appear to make sense to the carrot top, it did for the bushy haired girl. Who proceeded to share her excitement at discovering that she was about to enter a world where a sizeable portion of it's ruling class viewed her as a second class citizen.
Ron confused. Hermione frowns in consideration before going on a whole spiel.
"I…see. And yes I am. You can't imagine what a shock it was to discover that I was a witch. But in hindsight it makes so much sense. I did a bit of light reading on the subject of displays of accidental magic in children, and it was quite illuminating. What were your first displays of magic? Mine was when I was six, causing a out of reach book to fall into my hands."
Flinching as he recalled the consequences of his first display of accidental magic, for the act of unlocking his cupboard had resulted in his first ever thrashing, Harry took a moment to recall the calming exercises his dad and Stolas taught him before responding to her question.
"That's a rather personal question from someone who hasn't even introduced themselves yet."
Though taken back by his response to her question, the girl nevertheless does what nods her head in agreement before introducing herself.
"Yes of course. How rude of me. I'm Hermione Granger. And you are?"
Deciding to go with a much less hostile version of the answer he gave Malfoy, Harry opened his mouth to introduce himself.
Only for the Ginger to beat him to it.
"Ron Weasely. And this is Harry Potter."
Glaring at the carrot top, who at least had the decency to look ashamed for his actions, Harry could only sigh as Herminee, or was it Herminny, went into full on nerd mode.
"Oh my gosh are you really? I mean, I already read all about you, and knew that you were going to attend. But none of the books really knew what your life was like for the past 10 years. I doubt it was filled with some of the more…dramatic adventures that some people came up with. But I think…"
"Really? You think? Cause from where I'm sitting it looks more like you parrot everything you read in a vain attempt to impress people."
He didn't mean to snap. He truly didn't.
But the fact that people were making a profit writing stories about him while he was forced to wear oversized hand me downs and on starvation rations was enough to make him lose his temper.
And judging by Hermione's fearful expression, it was clear that she knew that she had crossed some sort of line.
"I…I just wanted to let you know what people have been saying about you."
At this Harry could only offer a bitter laugh.
"Is that so? Well obviously they've gotten it wrong, and I will probably be asking my parents to sue those publishing companies since I do not recall giving my permission to use my image for commercial purposes. But…"
"Wait. I thought you parents where dead?"
Shooting Ron a glare for the interruption, the disguised dragon Demon took a deep breather to calm himself before continuing.
"If you are referring to James and Lily Potter, yes they are. However I wasn't referring to the people who brought me into this world. Or does the concept of adoption not exist in the Magical World?"
Though his angry tone managed to silence the Ginger, it did nothing for the bushy haired girl.
"Who adopted you? I mean, several of the more fanciful tales have you living with fairy creatures, or even Dumbledore himself. But I always thought that…"
Silencing the buck tooth girl with a wave of his hand, knowing that he would probably have to explain his use of wandless magic in the future, it was clear by Harry's expression that he had had enough.
"That spell will wear off by the time we get to Hogwarts. But before you go, I do have one piece of advice for you. Learn to keep your mouth shut. Asking questions, and memorizing everything in a text book might make you a favorite of our teachers, but it won't help you make friends. And since there are still many powerful people who have Nazi like ideas regarding the status of Newbloods, I wouldn't go aground alienating those that would otherwise wouldn't care about your blood status."
Watching with a glaring expression as Hermione stormed out in tears, Harry found his attention focused elsewhere as Ron decided to do what most people did when they saw an injustice.
Wait to intervene after the intitial crisis had passed.
"That was a little harsh wasn't?"
At this the green eyed boy could only shrug.
"Better she learn the truth now rather than make a fool of herself later. Though something tells me that she will choose to ignore my advice since she strikes me as the type who only listens to authority figures. Now as for you.."
Taking a mild sense of pleasure from Ron's fearful expression, Harry just pointed his ring wearing hand at the door.
"Out. Apart from a slightly foul smell coming from your pocket, you haven't done anything really to tick me off. But also you haven't really done anything to make me want to hang out with you. And since I was here first, I shouldn't be the one to leave."
His hand reaching towards the place where he had stashed his taser, Harry watched the Ginger's expression morph from anger to fear before he wisely left the compartment without another word.
And after re-establishing the privacy wars, ensuring that they were much stronger than last time, Harry laid back to enjoy something that had probably never before been heard on the Hogwarts Express.
The joys of Muggle Music.
"If you want blood, you got it.
Blood on the streets, blood on the rocks.
Blood in the gutter, every last drop.
You want blood, you got it."
….
ANNNNND that's it for now. I know it ends on a bit of a cliffhanger (i.e. Before the sorting) but this is already a pretty long chapter, so gonna leave it here.
Hopefully you can all forgive me lol
But anyways to summarize what has happened so far.
Harry's shopping trip in Diagon Alley, Gringotts, and my decision to have him meet Harry first in the robe shop instead of going with the movie meeting version.
Stolas of course would enjoy the experience, but Octavia, and of course Harry would not. The comment about the Goblins being a SPECIFIC racial stereotype has been raised in some discussion boards, plus the fact that Harry HAS been hanging around Blitzo and Loona for 3 years, and I can totally see them saying something like that lol.
Went with the well known 'Dumbledore is Harry's magical guardian' bit, but ensured that he HASN'T been dipping into the Potter vault for his own ends. Except for the gold for a memorial at Godric's Hollow (Will expand WHY that happened in later chapters) and the money that was SUPPOSED to help the Dursley's raise another child.
Also as a dragon Demon…Harry was always going be doing the Scrooge Mcduck gold swimming thing, except he's smart so he uses magic to turn heaps of solid gold into something he can swim through. He's not Smaug sized, let alone Horntail sized, so I believe the physics work lol.
His first meeting with Malfoy allowed him to use the lessons he received from Stella on how to properly interact with members of the aristocracy.
The family goodbye from Blitzo's pov at the station is of course self explanatory. Kept it strictly I.M.P. members for reasons of continuity (i.e. They were there when they rescued him from the Dursleys, they will be there when he goes to Hogwarts). Hedwig WILL be making an appearance later on. Next chapter or so. But it ties into my plans of Harry gets/wants to go home for the weekends soo, will be expanded later.
And for the meeting of the Golden Trio…..there IS potential for them to form….but also ensured that if they don't, the relationship isn't as antagonistic as it is in some other fanfic stories. And for those who question if Harry was too much of an asshole, gotta remember that he doesn't to well when it comes to reminders of the Potters, or the suggestion that the Imps are NOT his true family, and the Dursleys. He doesn't want to go to Hogwarts, so he is already dealing with anger issues, which of course get triggered when touchy subjects get mentioned.
When it came to Hermione, yes she had already annoyed him, but what he said was true, if rather harshly/bluntly delivered. She represents the type of Muggleborn that is both welcomed and hated by the Pureblood elite. (i.e. recognizes the wonder of the magical world, wants to study in the magical world, but thinks she knows better than everyone else, and wants to challenge the status quo). The know it all attitude makes it hard for people to like her, especially when her offers of help either a) makes people feel inadequate, and thus lash out, or b) makes things worse, key example being S.P.E.W. Though I confess that I am basing a lot of House Elf magic on the fan favorite trope of being happy in slavery/need to be bound to live.
Anyways, Harry's treatment, cruel as it was, was meant to call attention to the precariousness of her position in the Magical World. But of course leaves it up to her to decide whether or not she will use this advice to her benefit, or merely push ahead like she did in the books.
And yes…..that foul smelling stench from Ron is a certain traitorous rat, but Harry doesn't know about Wormtail…or Sirius yet. Promise to cover that in later chapters. All part of my plan lol.
And lastly….I already know how Harry will be sorted, lots of ideas posed to me. But after rereading a certain crossover….solidified the idea that I had been toying with for some time. Gotta read next chapter to find out what it is lol.
Anyways, once again a big thanks to Darkscythe Drake for their editing. IF you notice any errors…PLEASE PM me instead of leaving it as a review lol. I promise it will be addressed quickly.
Also pleased to see that this story is getting more mentions in TV Tropes categories, though it has yet to appear on the Fanfic Rec's page of Helluva Boss, or gotten it's own page, but I am sure we will get there.
As always plz review. No flames.
Til next time.