I'm sorry for the delay! But here it is! Thanks to Luna, Cris and Mani. Love you guys!
13
"What do you say about a movie tonight?" Emmett looks nervous, even though we've watched movies together every night since I started staying with him. It makes me smile.
"Sure, why do you ask?" I tuck some hair behind my ear as we wait by the register as the cashier scans our food. I clutch my card, determined to be the one to pay for the groceries.
"I mean like… at the movies?" His words come out strangled, as if it physically hurts him. My heart starts pounding in my chest, and I'm aware of the way he's looking at me — of how oddly domestic we're looking right now. Just a guy and a girl out for weekly groceries. Together. The older lady who's paying right now shoots me a gentle smile.
"You're asking me out, McCarty?" I sound confident, but deep down I'm dying. Is Emmett really asking me out in the middle of a grocery store? I shuffle on my feet nervously.
"I— I don't know, am I?" He chuckles, scratching the back of his neck.
I think about my options, about the heartache Irina caused, about the financial mess I've gotten myself into, about the way Emmett makes my stomach flutter and my heart skip a beat. I've never felt this way, not even with Irina. Irina was comfortable, but with Emmett I feel this primal need — feelings that haven't been there in forever.
"I'd love to." I smile. It's genuine and so wide my cheeks hurt a little. My face feels flaming hot, a stubborn blush coating my cheekbones all the way to my chest. I bite my bottom lip in an attempt to seem a little less eager, but Emmett's sporting the same look on his face as I am. He's fucking giddy. I love it. Just when I want to reach out for him, grab his sleeve, it's our turn at the checkout. I curse inwardly at the bad timing, but busy myself with bagging the groceries instead. I hand the lady my card before Emmett can even protest, and he runs his fingers through my ponytail. The innocent little action makes my breathing hitch.
When we get back to Emmett's place, his roommate is back. Jasper smiles at me and offers to help us with the bags.
"Jesus, how many people are going to be eating here, dude?" Jasper snickers. Emmett punches him in the gut when his friend tries to steal a bar of chocolate.
"Hands off the merchandise, Jas. That's Ro's chocolate." He's so playful, holding the chocolate up high above his head, taking advantage of the fact that he's so much taller than the both of us.
"Always so protective of your ladies, aren't you? Such a fucking kiss-ass, Emm… What's the problem? Afraid you'll be sleeping alone in that big bed of yours?" My eyes widen, and Emmett clears his throat. It's obvious Jasper is joking, teasing Emmett, but the assumption makes my heart swell a little bit.
"I wouldn't let him sleep alone for a bar of chocolate, for sure." I note, crossing my arms in front of my chest. I'm not even sure why I'm not denying his assumption in the first place. I like that Emmett's friend thinks I'm his lady. As Emmett lets his guard down, surprised by my words, I snatch the chocolate from his hands and wink at him. "Thanks, Soldier," I chuckle. His face goes a little red and I turn around, unable to hear what Jasper says to him next.
"So, you guys have any plans for tonight? Alice is working all night, so I might just order some Mexican food and watch a few horror flicks." The idea is so unappealing to me, that I hope Emmett feels the same way. Even though I don't want to steal him away from his life and his friends, I can't wait to go to the movies with him. To spend time with him. To go on a date with him. Together. It's a first step, and any step, no matter how small, means a lot to me. The fact that Emmett is willing to take it this slow is so incredible to me. It's true what they say —not every guy is an ass. They're not all going to take what they want without consent. I make myself useful and stack away the groceries, until a warm hand touches the back of my shoulder.
"Are you okay, Ro? I'm sorry about Jasper… He thought you and I were… Well, you know." Emmett shrugs and takes out a can of beer from the fridge. I take my playfulness up a notch and grab it from him after he cracks it open, take a few swigs. He looks at me, eyebrows arched, leaning against the kitchen counter.
"I know what he thought, and thanks for the drink. I really needed that." It comes out deeper and more gravely than I intended, and I watch Emmett swallow hard when I lick my lips, before he averts his eyes. "Tell me, Soldier," I start, moving closer until I'm standing right next to him, our arms touching. "What time do you need me to be ready tonight?"
"Ready? I thought you already were?" He's downright flirting with me, and I love the way it makes me feel.
"Stop making me blush, McCarty!" I shove him playfully but lose my balance. His strong hands curl around my biceps to keep me upright, and I'm so close to him it makes me
dizzy. He smells so good, his touch so warm… I wonder how it would feel if he was laying on top of me — naked. His blue eyes are so intense when he's looking at me. It's like he's seeing me for the first time.
"I'm making you blush? Well, I'd say that's a good thing." He smirks.
"Is it?" I wonder.
"Fuck yeah!" he exclaims. "Because you do the same to me, Ro." Emmett walks off with a wink, leaving me dumbfounded in the kitchen. Jesus fucking Christ… This man is going to be the death of me.
After a shower, I feel a little more ready for tonight. It took so much longer than usual, and I kept messing up my makeup. My hair isn't cooperating, so I have to make do with straightening it and hope for the best. I sweep it behind my shoulder and look at my reflection. I didn't take any of my dresses from the apartment just yet, which means I have to go on this date in jeans and a stupid T-shirt. At least it's a V-neck, and my favorite shade of red, and on the tighter side. Perfect. I fluff up my hair and make my way out of the bathroom and gasp when I spot Emmett sitting on the foot of the bed, looking delectable in black jeans and a camo-colored shirt with the sleeves rolled up.
"I swear, if you're claiming not to be ready now, I'm going to fucking pass out." He chuckles. I cock my head to the side.
"Why?"
"Because if you look any more gorgeous than you do now, I might spontaneously burst into flames." I bite my lip, looking away from him, feeling slightly awkward.
I grab my wallet and my phone and stuff them into my jacket pocket. Emmett is watching me as I zip up my boots. I feel slightly self-conscious, a little ridiculous when I bend down deeper than I have to, knowing he's checking out my ass. Why am I so fucking reluctant? So scared? This is Emmett McCarty, a gentleman, a good guy, a soldier, my savior for crying out loud.
"I really have to go pick up my stuff soon… I barely have anything to wear. So, I'm sorry I look this frumpled." My voice is low and shaky, knowing if he was Royce, I wouldn't hear the end of it. But again, this is Emmett. He scratches the short hairs at the nape of his neck, smiling like a fool.
"Ro, that's not frumpy. We're going to see a fucking movie. Not attend the Grammys, you know? Besides, I love a girl in jeans. And the fact that you wear them so well is nothing if not a feast for the eyes." He winks and leaves the room, looking over his shoulder. I bet
it's my little confession that's created this shift in our dynamic, but he leaves me standing there with my jaw slightly dropped anyway.
"You coming?"
I take a deep breath and follow Emmett out the apartment and into the car.
"What are you in the mood for?" I ask, looking at the various movie posters on the wall. Emmett purses his lips before he answers, scanning the synopses and images.
"I don't know…" He frowns. I can tell he wants to go see the gory action movie but doesn't say it. Instead of arguing, I tell him I want to see it and he looks at me, blue eyes full of admiration.
Two hours of darkness, sitting next to a hunk like Emmett McCarty almost hurts. My fingers ache, hand twitching every time he leans his arm on the armrest, plays with the straw in his drink. I want to touch him, the strange sensation overcoming me, blazing a hot fire through me. At one point, I can't resist anymore. I lean my head against his shoulder, feel him tense up before he sinks back into the seat. Emmett sighs, and I think it sounds happy, content, and I feel myself smile.
"That was the worst movie I've seen in a while." Emmet yawns. I roll my eyes and snicker, because even though I wasn't paying a lot of attention to the movie, I get it.
"Yeah, same." I feel giddy and nervous like this is the first date I've been on in my life, fumbling with my hands until I catch Emmett staring at me. Yes, I want him to make a move, but it also terrifies me. The thought of him grabbing my hand, I can handle, but more than that?
We stand in the middle of the busy theatre, standing still while the others seem to rush to either get home or get to their movie on time. "So," I start, looking around. My lower lip starts to feel raw and sore from all the biting I've been doing. I look at Emmett, who's looking at me — that look in his eyes as his pinky finger plays with mine. He takes my hand and I let him, curling my fingertips around his large, hot palm. "Thank you for tonight," I tell him. There's this dumb smile on my face that keeps on tugging, that's impossible to get off my face. My heart skips a beat when Emmett's face matches mine, when he pulls me close by my hand, holding our joined hands close against his chest. I swallow a lump in my throat and feel my chest heave. Fuck. This is happening. As Emmett gets even closer, his other hand tucks away strands of blonde behind my ear. His voice is soft, yet gravelly and rough, and makes my insides tingle with want and desire.
"You're the best thing about tonight, Ro." His thumb strokes the back of my hand and I melt. I see him move closer, smell his divine cologne mixed with the scent of his body wash, his shampoo… It's clouding my thoughts and making my head spin. Instead of leaning back, I feel my heels leave the ground, my other hand join both of ours on Emmett's strong chest.
Then he kisses me, lips touching mine so feathery soft I'm not even sure it's really happening. My heart pounds, rivaling the speed of a hummingbird's wings. Just as quickly as it happened, it's over and we're staring at each other. Emmett's cheeks glow a deeper shade of pink when he licks his lips. "Fuck," he breathes.
"I —," I start. He cocks his head, worry swimming into his eyes and I'm a little scared I'm giving him the wrong impression.
"I'm sorry," he says, brows furrowed.
"Don't." I shake my head. "Please don't be sorry, but I have to pee." I chuckle, shuffling nervously on my feet. Emmett lets out a laugh and looks over my shoulder, pulling me beside him and walking me to the doors to the bathroom.
"I'll be right here," he assures me.
Finding an empty stall, I sit down on a closed toilet seat, my face in my hands. My cheeks feel hot and feverish, my skin tingling. I'm all too aware of the familiar tingling in between my thighs, but it overpowers me. I can't do this, can I? It's too soon, too soon after Irina, and my life is nothing but a mess. Emmett is not a rebound, so I can't pursue him right now. I touch my lips, try to remember the feeling of his soft, full lips on mine. Suddenly my heart's racing again, but it's not because of Emmett's kiss. It's pure panic that overcomes me, throws me off. I wasn't expecting it. I let myself sink down to the ground, my head bowed down to my knees as I try to breathe.
I don't know how long I've been here, but the toilet seems deserted when I hear his voice.
"Spice? You okay?" He sounds worried, rushed as heavy footsteps echo through the bathroom. I see hands underneath my door, before his head lowers. "Hey, Ro… What's going on in there? Want to let me in?" He's so sweet, and I finally realize I've been crying. The skin of my face pulls as I wipe my nose on some toilet paper and unlock the door.
He's on his knees on the dirty floor with me, hands on my knees, soothing circles making me come back to the here and now.
"I'm sorry," I gasp. "I got overwhelmed... and I panicked." I shrug and feel ashamed, but he doesn't let me look away.
"Sweetheart, don't be sorry. C'mere." He holds out his hands and pulls me up, wraps his arms around me. "It's gonna be okay, I promise you."
There's a moment of comfortable silence when I cling to Emmett, fist his shirt in my hands and lean my face against him. He finally speaks, and I get his concern.
"Was that about me? About our kiss?" he wonders. I sigh into his chest and nuzzle him, feeling everything about Emmett calm me as my fingers dig into soft cotton.
"No. It's about me… about my life, the mess that it is. I don't want to give you the impression that I'm using you, that this is a game."
"Ro, I know you're not. You're real, you've got issues… I get that. It's not easy but I swear I'll help you through it. You don't have to do anything you don't want to because you feel pressured, or because I'm helping you. Okay? Don't think that I expect anything in return."
"Don't even think that I didn't want that kiss, Emm…" I give him his nickname, and it slips out of my mouth before I realize it. I needed this kiss, the reassurance that this wasn't just in my head. "But I don't know what else I can handle, to be honest."
"I'm a patient man, Rosalie. Trust me. From now on, it's in your hands," he says. I've calmed down and he leads me to the sink, handing me a few paper towels that he wet under the faucet.
I wipe my face, feeling his eyes on me the entire time. Was he being serious? A man who could wait?
"In my hands?" I ask.
"Yeah. I kissed you and you panicked. So whatever you want to do next, if you want to do it again… It's up to you and I'll run along at your speed."
"Why?"
"Because you're so fucking worth it, Ro."