"Jeanie, would you mind getting the icing ready?" Dunkerque asked. "It's best to add it when the donuts are hot."

I brought over a bowl of thick, mint green icing as Dunkerque pulled the freshly fried chocolate donuts out of the oil and onto a draining rack.

"Thank you so much for your help," Dunkerque said. "It always goes much faster with an extra pair of hands."

"No problem," I said, making some tea as she dipped the hot donuts into the icing, setting them aside to cool. She may have thanked me for helping, but all I really did was mix the icing ingredients together after she pre-portioned them and did everything else. Not that she needed me, being the master baker she is, but I don't mind lending a hand. I can't say no to a girl who's as sweet as the very confections she's known for.

Besides, I knew exactly why these donuts were being made...

KNOCK KNOCK

"Hello?" a male voice said.

Dunkerque and I turned to see who was at the door. I only froze while she smiled like nothing was wrong. Then again, why would she think that? I've never told anyone my secret.

"Commander! You're just in time!" Dunkerque said, smiling as the commander walked over to give her a hug.

My heart twisted slightly at seeing them hug. Even though I knew it was just a hug between friends, and while I agree that Dunkerque deserves all the hugs in the world, I couldn't help but wish it was me in her place.

"Have a seat. The donuts are almost cooled enough to eat," Dunkerque said, gesturing to the bar stools at the island counter.

The commander nodded, taking a seat as Dunkerque's attention returned to her cooking. As he scanned the room, his eyes landed on me, and I felt myself tense up immediately, like reflexes.

"Oh, Jean Bart. Sorry, I didn't see you. Good afternoon," he said with a smile.

"Oh... bonjour, Commander," I said, feeling my mouth become drier.

"She's been helping me," Dunkerque said. "She made the frosting."

"I just stirred a spatula. Nothing more."

"Oh, give yourself more credit, Jeanie," Dunkerque said. "Without you, the commander would be waiting much longer."

I pursed my lips, feeling my cheeks heat up. Kind of embarrassing to be called by my nickname in front of the commander, but I wasn't about to scold Dunkerque for it. Again, why would she think anything was wrong? How was she supposed to know that I was freaking out inside?

After all, it's not her fault that I've never told anyone about... my crush on the commander.

"Is the tea ready, Jeanie?" Dunkerque asked.

The tea! Without saying a word, I immediately went to bring a mug over for the commander, setting it in front of him. Anything to do instead of standing around like a dumbass.

"Thank you," he said as I placed a mug of tea next to him.

I nodded, trying to hide the fact that his eyes were making my heart burn. Sure, it was good manners to say thank you for something like that, but having those big eyes look at me coupled with his lovely smile... it was like a split-second glimpse into heaven.

...ugh... what a dumb thought.

"Here we are! We made your favorite, so dig in!" Dunkerque said with a big smile, setting a platter of donuts down in front of us. "Chocolate donuts with peppermint icing!"

The commander wasted no time, immediately reaching for one and taking a bite.

"Wow, these are delicious!" the commander said. "Your desserts are always the best. Thanks so much, you two."

"My pleasure, Commander. A parting gift for my last day as your secretary, and for being so nice to me," Dunkerque said, reaching for one herself and taking a bite. "Mmm... I love sweets so much. Jeanie, you have one too. Go on."

"Huh?" I said stupidly. Reality rushed back to me as I noticed I had been staring at the commander this whole time. Not even studying him, just blankly staring like an idiot. I pursed my lips as I reached for a donut, fighting the tension in my muscles. So tense, one could probably hear them creaking as they moved. I looked up from the confection and my eyes met with the commander's, sending a jolt through my heart.

He gave me a friendly smile, and I could feel myself freezing again. My cheeks warmed up so quickly with him looking at me. I couldn't stop myself from smiling, and my free hand found my hair and started fidgeting with it.

What was happening? Just him looking at me was turning me into a giddy fangirl. Trying to find any distraction, I took a quick bite of the donut I was holding. Thankfully, since these were Dunkerque's donuts, they were easy to get lost in. Damn these were good... I could see why these were the commander's favorite.

"I'm going to miss being your secretary," Dunkerque said. "But I'll still make plenty of treats for you. And now, I know your preferences."

The commander chuckled. "Thanks. Might need to watch myself, though. Belfast will have a fit if I eat too many sweets."

Dunkerque giggled. "She has a good point. Every once in a while, how about that? Maybe I can mix in some smoothies too."

"Works for me," the commander said. "So, you looking forward to a day off tomorrow?"

"Oh, absolutely," Dunkerque said. "I'm always excited for Sundays. A nice day to relax and spend quality time with those I love. What about you, Jeanie? Are you excited for some time off?"

"Mmm?" I said.

Wait... damn it! I zoned out again!

"Jeanie, are you okay? You've been unusually quiet," Dunkerque asked, rubbing my back. "Do you not like the donuts?"

"What? Of course, I do," I said. "Sorry. Just a lot on my mind."

"Like what?" the commander asked. "Anything you want to talk about?"

My gaze met the commander's and once again I was left speechless. Why? Why the hell do two stupid eyes leave me helpless? Two stupid... big... beautiful eyes...

"I think I need to go!" I said, rather loudly. I could tell it was abrupt because Dunkerque and the commander both flinched when I spoke.

"What?" Dunkerque asked. "Jeanie, are you sure you're okay?"

"Y-Yes, I'm fine," I said. "I just need to... um... train a bit. That'll help clear my head."

Training? That's the best excuse I could come up with? I guess training is never a bad thing, but on top of making everything awkward, I could tell Dunkerque wasn't totally buying it. Nevertheless...

"Well, okay then," Dunkerque said, grabbing another donut with a napkin and handing it to me. "Here, have another one for the road. And if you want to talk about anything, just let me know, alright?"

"Thanks," I said. "Catch you two later."

Dunkerque gave me a quick hug goodbye while the commander offered a small wave. Feeling myself blushing, I quickly waved back and immediately got the hell out of there.

As soon as they left my sight, the palm of my hand met my face, and a heavy sigh left my mouth through my gritting teeth.

"What the hell is wrong with me?" I seethed. It was a question that seemed to come up after every encounter with the commander. It felt like there was fire in my cheeks. Thank god nobody was in the hallway to see me like this.

Damn it... the closest I've ever been to him in a casual setting, and I totally blew it. I muttered curses to myself. There was absolutely no reason for any of this, other than my own flustered stupidity putting me here, and I had no choice but to follow through.

At this point, I just needed solitude. Somewhere to let this embarrassment drain away.

And I knew the perfect place.

I took a deep breath, giving myself a couple light slaps on the cheek and briskly walking, stuffing Dunkerque's donut in my face. At the very least I had some comfort food to give me relief, if only for a few minutes.

"Ah... finally..."

I arrived at my private hideaway, and I allowed the scent of sea spray to soothe my body. Hidden behind some dense trees and bushes was a breathtaking overlook of the sea, with what appeared to be the wreckage of an old pirate ship wedged into the side, forming a surprisingly sturdy railing. By day, one could see the clouds roll over the distant landmasses, along with the occasional sailboat passing by, across a dazzling blue sea. At night, no artificial lights inhibited the majesty of the night sky, with the bands of the galaxy itself being faintly visible, and the waters taking on an almost ethereal glow.

I found this purely by chance, and it remains the most beautiful place I've ever seen. So beautiful, that I brought a patio umbrella and hammock to turn it into my personal hideaway. So far, I've managed to keep it a secret from everyone. Whenever I need fresh air and privacy, this is my go-to place. And fresh air and privacy is exactly what I needed after making a complete ass out of myself in front of the commander and Dunkerque.

I took off my boots and jacket, kicking back in the hammock, letting out a hefty sigh. The salty air gave me some relaxation, but that couldn't distract me from the way I behaved just a few minutes ago.

What the hell was that? I totally choked and made everything awkward.

Why does the commander turn me into a dumb fangirl? I just can't think when he's around. I get so distracted that I lose all common sense, and act on impulse instead of logic, while somehow also being so nervous that I become indecisive and end up frozen.

How does that even make sense? Why does this happen to me? What do I have to be insecure about? I'm the most powerful battleship of the Vichya Dominion. I bear the sacred Iris's name. I rely on myself for strength, and never let my emotions or any kind of blind faith guide or inhibit me in any way. Not anymore, at least. I had to learn that lesson the hard way. I thought I was past letting my emotions get the best of me... until now.

The commander somehow snuck into my heart. Whenever he's around, my pride and confidence is nothing more than a mask, hiding the truth that I'm completely enamored by him and even the slightest compliment could turn me into jelly. Even just hearing him say thank you and looking at me with those big eyes almost made me melt.

It's not my fault that he has the biggest eyes I've ever seen, and... a smile that could illuminate an entire city at night... is such a fantastic commander... so kindhearted... and the most handsome guy I've ever seen...

...the hell? Why am I thinking like this? My own thoughts make me want to puke. But this is what I get for completely blowing an opportunity to just talk to the commander. Why is that so hard? He's not intimidating. My heart just makes him seem that way.

Maybe I choked earlier from seeing Dunkerque get along so well with him. Am I jealous? They seemed to have gotten so close while Dunkerque was his secretary, especially from the way he just walked up and hugged her without blinking an eye. I can't blame him, though. What's not to love about Dunkerque? She's strong, beautiful, dependable, and the sweetest girl on the planet. Plus she's a damn good cook. Wouldn't be surprised if he liked her in the same way I like him. Sweet Dunkerque instead of... cold-hearted me...

"Damn it!" I grunted, grabbing my hair. "Stop thinking that way!"

I can't let myself be jealous. Not again. The last time I let jealousy consume me, I failed everyone. My country... my brethren... myself...

I winced, feeling my heart sting me. That life is behind me now. Everyone else has moved on, and so should I. Nevertheless... I'd give anything to forget Casablanca.

I turned my head and gazed out at the sea. The sun was beginning to set, turning the sky into fire. The colors were intoxicating, and I could feel my eyelids growing heavy.

I think a nap is exactly what I needed to clear my head. The salty air took over my senses as I allowed the rhythm of the waves to lull met to sleep...

By the time I woke up from my nap, feeling refreshed and invigorated, it was nighttime. The sky's fire had been quenched by stars and darkness, and the moon was just above the horizon.

Hmm... I could hear some distant commotion coming from the port. We all had the day off tomorrow too... maybe I should go see if Dunkerque, Algerie, or Richelieu would be up for something. They usually were happy to hang out on a Saturday night.

Either way, I needed to get back before anyone got worried and began searching for me. Wouldn't want anyone else to find my personal hideaway. I got out of the hammock, put my boots and jacket back on, and made my way back to the port.

As I arrived, and more of the stars became hidden, I couldn't help but wonder what the commander does on his days off.

OOF!

"Ugh!" I grunted. "My bad. I wasn't watching where I was—"

I stopped when I realized who I bumped into. He slowly turned his head, revealing his handsome face...

"Jean Bart?"

"C-Commander!"

It felt like a branding iron had been shoved against my chest.

"I didn't see you there," I said, trying to maintain my cool.

"It's okay. It happens," he said, smoothing out his uniform. "You alright?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," I said, fidgeting my fingers.

"Hey, I'm glad we ran into each other," he said. "I was actually looking for you."

"You were?" I said abruptly. I took a deep breath, trying to relax my rapid heartbeat even slightly. "I mean... what do you need?"

"Well, first of all... are you doing okay?" he asked.

I looked at him quizzically. "What do you mean?"

"Earlier with Dunkerque," he said. "You left really suddenly. You seemed really bothered by something. And when I waved goodbye, you just kind of... glared at me."

"I did?" I asked.

"Yeah," he said. "Kind of bummed me out. I was hoping to talk to you a little."

He... wanted to talk to me?! Damn it! What the hell is wrong with me?! I really had a chance, and I blew it!

No... stop... don't beat yourself up over it. He doesn't seem mad. Just stay calm...

"I just want to make sure you're doing alright," he said. "Did I say something to upset you?"

Crap. Now I've been called out. I couldn't just walk away. He'd only grow more suspicious.

He had me trapped...

...wait, no! If I treat it as a trap, I'll just keep choking. It's a second chance! I can't let my feelings get the best of me again!

Clearing my throat and straightening myself out, I looked at him dead in the eye, trying my hardest to ignore the fact that my heart was about to incinerate my body from the inside.

"It was nothing ya said," I said. "I'm doing fine. Thank you."

I kept my straight face as he studied me. Just like Dunkerque earlier, he didn't look like he was buying it completely.

"You can be honest with me," he said.

I felt a sting in my heart. Damn it... half of me did want to be honest. Half of me just wanted to tell him. But the other half of me knew I couldn't.

"Just a lot on my mind, that's all," I maintained, despite the ache in my heart.

He studied me a little further, until he simply gave a nod.

"Alright, if you say so," he said. "I won't press you on the matter. But that's not the main reason why I was looking for you."

"Oh?" I said. "What's up, then?"

"Well, I'm just gonna go ahead and ask it," he said. "Would you like to be my next secretary, Jean Bart?"

I gasped. Did he just ask...?

"...you want me as your next secretary ship?" I asked.

"If you want to be," he said.

"Why me?" I asked. "And why don't you need Dunkerque anymore? I'm sure she was a fantastic secretary."

"She was," he admitted. "But I rotate out secretaries pretty regularly. It's my way of getting to know everyone better. As for why I'm coming to you... I asked Dunkerque for her opinion, and she recommended you. She said you're extremely honest and reliable."

"She did, huh?" I asked. I could feel my cheeks heating up as I tried to maintain my composure, even though on the inside... I was squealing. "So, choosing new secretaries is how you meet girls?" I remarked, giving a smirk. "Sounds kind of sketchy if you ask me."

"Well, if you don't want the position, you don't have to take it," he said. "It was only an offer."

"What?" I said, feeling my heart drop. "I never said I wouldn't!"

"Are you sure?" he asked, raising an eyebrow. "I don't want to force you."

"You're not forcing anyone," I said. "I'll be your secretary, and I'll be the best damn secretary you've ever had!"

I tried to give him the best determined smirk I could, despite how hard and fast my heart was beating. He studied me again, as if trying to ascertain if I could meet the bar I just set for myself.

But after what seemed like forever, he gave me his captivating smile, putting me at ease.

"Well then, I look forward to Monday," he said. "Have a good weekend, Jean Bart."

I give him a firm nod. "You too, Commander."

He gave a wave and walked away, and my heart finally relaxed. At least... somewhat. Did that just happen? Did he really ask me to...?

The stress that dominated me was washed away by joy, causing a big smile to break out on my face. I could feel my cheeks growing redder as excitement stirred within me. I quickly covered my mouth to muffle the girliest squeal I've ever made. God, he really did turn me into a giddy fangirl, but right now I didn't care. My heart was racing with energy. I don't think I've ever been so thrilled. A miracle that he even wanted to talk to me after making such an ass out of myself earlier.

Honestly, I had Dunkerque to thank for recommending me.

"Jeanie!"

Speaking of whom...

I turned to see Dunkerque approaching, carrying a couple bottles of wine.

"Hello, Dunkerque," I said, trying to contain my excitement from what just happened.

"You look much happier," Dunkerque said.

"The commander asked me to be his next secretary, so I'm feeling pretty good right now," I said, trying to stay cool, ignoring the fact that I was actually overjoyed.

"Oh, that's wonderful! Congratulations," Dunkerque cheered, giving me a hug.

"I should be thanking you for your recommendation," I said.

"No need. You'll make an amazing secretary, I have no doubt," Dunkerque said.

"Thanks," I said. "So, what's with the wine?"

"I'm meeting Richelieu and Algerie down by the shoreline to chat and have some drinks. You should join us!"

I chuckled. It really seemed like everything was coming together after messing up so badly earlier today.

"Gimme one of those bottles," I said.

Dunkerque smiled, handing me a bottle and I followed her down to the beachfront.

As I walked, a feeling of worry crept over me. It took a lot of effort to remain cool in front of the commander. That was only for a few minutes. But knowing that, as his new secretary, I'd be the closest person to him for the foreseeable future...

...how long could I maintain that façade?

A/N: Man, this is hard. Jean Bart is such an interesting character, but having her in such an unlikely situation is difficult. Was fun, though.

But onto more business-related things... I know plenty of you are concerned about my currently active fics, mainly My Shining Starlight and Loveliest of Trees. Those have not been abandoned, I promise. But when I have a spark of inspiration, I act on it, and everything else gets pushed out. My mind is very sporadic, and I just do whatever I feel like. The main issue with My Shining Starlight in particular is that I'm not sure what to do without regurgitating the US/UM dialogue, and I have some good stuff planned but I need to figure out how to get there in an interesting way. As for Loveliest of Trees, I just don't have the motivation. If you could see from this story, I'm trying to go for something different to challenge myself, and because Jean Bart is such an interesting character that I believe I could have fun with. If I'm not motivated, I won't do a good job, because I'll want to get it done so I can back to the things I am motivated for. I don't want to do that to those who are very excited to see where the stories will go next.

Just some updates for you guys in the interest of transparency. Rest assured that those stories have not been abandoned, and I will work on them until they are finished. Until then, have a good one.