Hi guys. This is a one-shot written from Remus Lupins POV. It's set in the Prisoner of Azkaban on the train ride to Hogwarts. I hope you enjoy
I sigh as I haul my peeling, battered, held-together-with-string up onto the empty rack in one of the train's compartments. I know I should go another way to Hogwarts, but old memories pulled me back here. I picked the very last compartment, figuring no one would venture back here. I wanted to grab the one we had always picked when we were students, but that was in the very middle of the train, and I figured there was a point where I could be too overwhelmed with memories. I settle down in the corner, wrapping a blanket around myself. I close my eyes and wait for sleep to overcome me. Unfortunately, a group of kids decide to board early, so my sensitive ears pick up on their every sound. I sigh, moving around into a more comfortable position, but keeping my eyes shut. Slowly, the train starts to fill up and even more conversations reach my ears. I do my best to shut them out. I look out the window of the train and see that it's 10:58. The compartment is still empty, so sigh in relief that I will have this ride uninterrupted. Suddenly, three sets of footsteps reach my ears, stopping everyone now and then. Eventually, they reach the doors to this compartment and I hear a girls voice.
"Come one, all the others are full."
I stifle a groan as the three people file in. I stay still, pretending I'm asleep, not wanting to have to talk. The seat bounces a little as someone sits down on the opposite end, and I hear the other two sit on the other seat.
"Who d'you reckon he is?" a male voice asks.
The same girl I heard before immediately answers.
"Professor R. J. Lupin."
I stiffen, wondering how she knows my name. The boy asks that exact question.
"It's on his suitcase," she answers.
I relax a little as I remember the peeling letters stamped across my bag. Unfortunately, the boy is full of questions.
"Wonder what he teaches?"
I resist the urge to roll my eyes. The girl lowers her voice to a whisper, but it doesn't do anything, as I can still hear her fine.
"That's obvious. There's only one vacancy isn't there? Defence Against the Dark Arts."
I almost raise my eyebrows. Although it's easy to work out, I get the feeling the girl is quite smart and a sort of know-it-all. Almost like someone else…
"Well, I hope he's up to it," the boy says doubtfully. "He looks like one good hex would finish him off, doesn't he?"
I try not to shift as I pretty much feel their eyes on my ragged clothes and broken frame. Luckily, the boy continues on quickly.
"Anyway…what were you going to tell us?"
I guess he must be talking to the other person in the compartment, who has yet to speak. When the person speaks, I realise it's another boy.
"Your dad gave me a warning on the platform," he starts.
I'm not sure who's dad he's talking about, but my ears are now very open.
"A few days ago I heard your parents arguing about Black's escape from Azkaban."
I tense up completely upon hearing that name. Years of memories flood back to me at that moment, and I miss a bit of their conversation. Different emotions rattle through me, and it takes everything I have not to move. I desperately try to push all those thoughts from my mind, determined not to lose myself in the pain of what happened. To help me do that, I try and listen to the conversation again.
"But the weirdest part was he told me not to go looking for Black. It's like he thinks I run into danger."
I missed some of the information, but it doesn't really matter. The girl's next words clear everything up for me.
"Sirius Black escaped to come after you? Oh, Harry… you'll have to be really, really careful. Don't go looking for trouble, Harry…"
Again, I fight off the emotions that come back when she says his name. But then I latch onto what else she said. Harry. A lightbulb goes off in my head as I realise who the boy in the compartment is.
Harry Potter. The Boy Who Lived.
My best friend's son. I take a deep breath as panic settles in. I knew I would be facing him at some point this year, but I didn't expect it to be so soon.
In and out. In and out.
I take deep breaths to calm myself.
"I don't go looking for trouble," Harry says. "Trouble usually finds me."
Despite the situation, I almost laugh aloud at how different his words are to what his father would have said. But the other boys speaks again, and all the humour disappears.
"How thick would Harry have to be, to go looking for a nutter who wants to kill him?" he said, his voice shaking a little. He continues. "No one knows how he got out of Azkaban. No one's ever done it before. And he was a top-security prisoner too."
I frown beneath the blanket as I realise that of course, he would be the one to break out of a high-security prison unharmed.
"But they'll catch him, won't they?" the girl says. "I mean, they've got all the Muggles looking out for him too…"
"What's that noise?" the other boy said suddenly.
Indeed, a faint, tinny sort of whistle was coming from somewhere. I strained my ears to try and locate where it was coming from. I narrowed it down to somewhere near Harry was supposedly sitting. I tense a little.
"It's coming from your trunk, Harry," the boy says.
A rustle sounds and I realise he's stood up. A moment passes before the sound becomes much more distinct.
"Is that a Sneakoscope?" the girl asks, also standing up.
"Yeah… mind you, it's a very cheap one," the boy replied. "It went haywire just as I was tying it to Errol's leg to send it to Harry."
I relax a little as I realise we're probably not in danger.
"Were you doing anything untrustworthy at the time?" the girl asks persistently.
"No!" the boy defends himself. "Well… I wasn't supposed to be using Errol. You know he's not really up to long journeys… but how else was I supposed to get Harry's present to him?"
I'm still a little on edge, but I try not to worry about it too much.
"Stick it back in the trunk," Harry advised as the Sneakoscope whistled piercingly, "or it'll wake him up."
With a start, I realise he's talking about me. The noise fades as the boy stuffs it away somewhere. I zone out as they start talking about Hogsmeade. Running through the years, I realise that they'll be in their third year, meaning their first year at the little town. I smile as memories of our trips to Hogsmeade fill my mind, for once not being painful. A bit passes before Harry speaks up again, unintentionally grabbing my attention.
"Spect it will," he says, sounding annoyed. "You'll have to tell me when you've found out."
"What d'you mean?" the other boy, Ron I think they said, says.
I frown.
"I can't go. The Dursleys didn't sign my permission form, and Fudge wouldn't either."
A low growl builds in my throat and I fight to keep it back. But just the thought of those people fills me with anger. The idea that Harry had to grow up with them, and return to them every summer…
"You're not allowed to come? But — no way — McGonagall or someone will give you permission —" Ron argues.
Harry gives a hollow laugh. I understand his thoughts. Professor McGonagall, head of Gryffindor house, was very strict to all the students. Save our group for some unknown reason though.
"– or we can ask Fred and George, they know every secret passage out of the castle —" Ron continues.
I raise my eyebrows. Surely whoever they were wouldn't know all the secret passages.
"Ron!" the girl reprimands.
I silently thank her.
"I don't think Harry should be sneaking out of the school with Black on the loose —" she continues.
"Yeah, I expect that's what McGonagall will say when I ask of permission," Harry says bitterly.
"But if we're with him," Ron says, not discouraged. "Black wouldn't dare —"
"Oh, Ron, don't talk rubbish," the girl snaps. "Black's already murdered a whole bunch of people in the middle of a crowded street, do you really think he's going to worry about attacking Harry just because we're there?"
I push back the memories fighting to come back. I hear movement, and Ron snaps at the girl.
"Don't let that thing out!"
I vaguely wonder what he's talking about when suddenly commotion strikes. Something, probably a pet, leaps from presumably the girl's lap, onto, I'm guessing, Ron's.
Get out of it!" Ron yells.
"Ron, don't!" the girl says angrily.
Not wanting to listen to their argument, I stir a little bit to discourage them. I turn my head the other way, and I feel their eyes on me apprehensively. No one keeps talking. The train keeps moving, and I hear the students moving throughout the train. Just then, I hear the food trolley stop at the door.
"D'you think we should wake him up?" Ron asked a little awkwardly. "He looks like he could do with some food."
I make a split-second decision to stay still and not 'wake up.'
Someone stands up and moves towards me.
"Er — Professor?" The girl. "Excuse me — Professor?"
I don't move. Another voice speaks.
"Don't worry, dear," I recognise her voice as the trolley witch. "If he's hungry when he wakes, I'll be upfront with the driver."
I get the sense she knows I'm awake, but I'm extremely grateful she doesn't say anything.
"I suppose he is asleep?" says Ron quietly, as the witch slides the compartment door closed. "I mean — he hasn't died, has he?"
I hold back a snort.
"No, no, he's breathing," whispers the girl.
The three sit in silence again. The time passes, and I hear rain start to fall outside the train. Suddenly, another three footsteps reach the door, and one pulls the door to the compartment open.
"Well, look who it is," a boy says.
I tense at his hostile tone.
"Potty and the Weasel."
I hear two chuckles and decide that this is a school bully, probably a Slytherin, and his two cronies.
"I heard your father finally got his hands on some gold this summer, Weasley," he continues. "Did your mother die of shock?"
I grit my teeth to stop myself from interfering. Hopefully, Harry will have inherited the 'sass' from both his parents and be able to handle the annoyance. Unfortunately, Ron stands up quickly. To try and diffuse the argument, I snort a little in my 'sleep.'
"Who's that?" the boy asks.
"New teacher," Harry says, getting to his feet as well. "What were you saying, Malfoy?"
I sense the boy – Malfoy – glaring at the three, then giving in.
"C'mon," Malfoy muttered to his two cronies, and the door slides shut.
Harry and Ron sit down again.
"I'm not going to take any crap from Malfoy this year," Ron says angrily. "I mean it. If he makes one more crack about my family, I'm going to get hold of his head and – " he cuts off, probably to imitate something with his hands.
"Ron," the girl hissed. "Be careful…"
I guess she's indicating me, but I couldn't care less. I remember Lucius Malfoy from his school, and I know the boy must be his son. If they're anything alike, which I got the sense they are, I wouldn't put up with him giving Harry and his friend's trouble.
The rain falls more heavily as the train continued. The train rattled and the wind whistled. I'm hoping they don't find it suspicious I'm still supposedly sleeping, but they don't question it.
"We must be nearly there," Ron says.
As soon as he says that, the train slows down. I frown. It doesn't seem like it's been long enough.
"Great," Ron says.
He gets up and walks carefully around me to look out the window.
"I'm starving. I want to get to the feast…" he says.
"We can't be there yet," the girl interrupts.
"So why're we stopping?" Ron asks.
The train gets slower and slower. As the noise of the train falls away, the wind and rain sounded louder than ever against the windows. Someone gets up and opens the door to look outside. With a jolt, the train comes to a stop, and distant thuds and bangs tell me that luggage had fallen out of the racks. Suddenly, the room seems to dim. I crack my eyes open a little and see that's it pitch black. I open my eyes completely, blinking to try and see through the dark. I don't move though.
"What's going on?" Ron's voice sounds from behind Harry.
"Ouch!" the girl gaps. "Ron, that was my foot!"
I see a figure moving and realise it's Harry feeling his way back to his seat.
"D'you think we've broken down?" he asks.
"Dunno…" Ron says.
He moves a bit, and I quickly close my eyes again, just in case. Something squeaks, and I realise Ron is wiping the window clean to try and see out.
"There's something moving out there," he says quietly. "I think people are coming aboard…"
I furrow my eyebrows. No one can get on board the train unless they're magical. Suddenly, the compartment door opens, and someone falls. I open my eyes again and see the person fell on Harry's legs.
"Sorry!" the voice yelps. "D'you know what's going on? Ouch! Sorry —"
My eyes adjust to the dark and I can finally see the people in the room. Thanks to my furry friend, I can see very well in the dark and I can hear and smell good as well. The girl in the compartment has big bushy brown hair, and she now sits next to – I'm assuming – Ron, who has bright ginger hair. I try not to make a sound as my eyes fall on Harry, and I am instantly reminded of his father. The figure that fell is a round boy.
"Hullo, Neville," Harry says, pulling Neville up by his cloak.
I gasp quietly as I remember the Longbottom's son, Neville. I vaguely remember him being Harry's age.
"Harry? Is that you? What's happening?" Neville asks fearfully.
"No idea! Sit down —" Harry says.
I wince as Neville goes to sit down on a cat – I realise that must've been what jumped on Ron's lap before – and it darts over into the girl's arms.
"I'm going to go and ask the driver what's going on," the girl says.
She gets up and opens the door, and I wince again as she collides with another girl. They both squeal in pain.
"Who's that?" the girl asks.
"Who's that?" comes the reply.
The girls get up, and I see the new girl has the same coloured hair as Ron. I realise they must be related.
"Ginny?" the first girl asks.
"Hermione?" the redhead – Ginny asks.
With a start, I realise that must be the other girl's name.
"What are you doing?" Hermione asks.
"I was looking for Ron —" Ginny replies.
Definitely siblings. Ginny looks younger than the rest of them, so I assume she is Ron's younger sister.
"Come in and sit down —" Hermione says.
"Not here!" Harry says quickly as Ginny goes to sit accidentally sit on him. "I'm here!"
"Ouch!" Neville says.
Growing annoyed at their helplessness, I decide to step in.
"Quiet!" I say, my voice hoarse.
Everyone turns their head to look at me. No one spoke. Sighing, I create a small ball on flames in my hand to provide some light. Right now, I'm not focused on their bickering. I'm focused on the fact that the train is still broken down, and nothing's happening to try and fix it. Suddenly, my ears pick up a small sound from the front of the train. I hear a door sliding open, and small whimpers from the students inside. Nothing happens though, and the movement continues throughout the train. As the thing gets closer, a cold feeling spreads throughout the compartment, and a sense of dread fills me. My blood runs cold as I realise what's going on.
"Stay where you are," I say, my voice still hoarse.
Slowly, cautiously, I get to my feet still holding the small flames in my hand. I move towards the door, trying to ignore the cold feeling. I freeze as the door slides open before I reach it. The flames in my hand shiver slightly as I stare up at the cloaked figure towering towards the ceiling. It's cloak covers wear its face would be if it had one. It draws a long breath, that sends shivers down my spine. The feeling of dread intensifies, and desperately, I try once again to push away the memories that threaten to overcome me. Suddenly, behind me, I hear a crashing noise. I turn, and fear strikes me. I reach for my wand.
"None of us is hiding Sirius Black under our cloaks. Go," I say, my voice coming out stronger than I thought it would.
The dementor doesn't move though.
My mind races for my happy memory. But I can't find it. Memories of Sirius being hauled away by the guards strike my head. The dead bodies of Lily and James Potter riddle my vision. The full moon appears, and the wolf within me stirs. I blink tears from my eyes as all my old scars start burning, and all I see is despair and misery from my life. Eons away, the Dementor moves slightly, and something in the depths of my stomach pulls at me. With every ounce of strength in my body, I pull away from the dread. I focus on a happy memory.
James and Lily's wedding, so many years ago. The couple were beaming, so in love. Peter was smiling as well, happy to see his best friend so content. But all I focused on was the fifth figure. My eyes raked over his messy black hair, and my breath catches as he turns to look at me. His impossibly grey eyes bare into me, drawing me into their shining depths. He grins, and my whole world gets brighter. Sirius wraps his arm around me, pulling me close. My heart raced at the contact. Still smiling, he rises slightly on his toes and leans up to me. Slowly, lower my head to his, and our lips touch. The best feeling in the world rushes through me, and the world fades as I focus on the love shared in that kiss.
Bringing forth this memory, I channel the love I felt, and point my wand directly at the dementor.
"Expecto Patronum!"
A silver light burst from the end of my wand, and the dementor lurches back. It lets go of Harry, and I push it out of the compartment. I follow it out, sending it off the train. The heads of students pop out of the train compartments, but I ignore them, making sure the creature leaves the train. Once it's gone, I drop the spell, and stagger, leaning against the wall to support myself. I push myself up, then race back to the compartment to make sure Harry's okay. His friends are surrounding him, trying to get him to wake up.
"Move aside please," I ask.
Surprisingly, they listen straight away, and they clear a path for me. Then I remember I am a teacher now, and they have to listen to me. I ignore this and kneel beside Harry. I check his breathing and sigh with relief when once I make sure he's alright. I turn back to the group, eyeing their worried looks.
"He will be fine," I say. "He's just passed out."
Everyone sighs with relief as I move away, and Ron and Hermione move forwards again, Ginny and Neville watching quietly. Suddenly, the lights come on again and the train starts moving. Just then, Ron starts slapping his friends face. I raise my eyebrows at his technique.
"Harry! Harry! Are you all right?" he says.
Slowly, Harry comes back to consciousness. The tightness in my chest I didn't realise was there, releases.
"W-what?" Harry opens his eyes.
He pushed his glasses back to his face, and Ron and Hermione help him back onto his seat.
"Are you okay?" Ron asks again, nervously.
"Yeah," says Harry, looking quickly toward the door.
I realise he's looking for the dementor.
"What happened?" Harry asked. "Where's that — that thing? Who screamed?"
My eyebrows knit together. With a sinking feeling, I realise he remembered his worst memories when the Dementor was lying over him. I blink back tears as I make the connection. Harry heard Lily screaming as Voldemort…
"No one screamed," says Ron, more nervously still.
Harry looks around the compartment. I pull out a piece of chocolate I always keep stashed.
"But I heard screaming —" he says.
I snap the slab into smaller pieces, and everyone jumps. I wince. Probably not the best move.
"Here," I say, handing a larger piece to Harry. "Eat it. It'll help."
It's true, the chocolate does help lessen the cold feeling and it pushes the bad memories away slightly. Harry takes the chocolate but doesn't eat it. I sigh, then hand everyone else some chocolate.
"What was that thing?" Harry asks.
"A Dementor," I say, handing the last piece to Ginny. "One of the Dementors of Azkaban." Everyone stares at me. I crumple up the empty chocolate wrapper and put it in my pocket.
"Eat," I repeat. "It'll help."
I fidget a little under the stares the students are giving me. Needing an excuse to leave, I speak to the group.
"I need to speak to the driver, excuse me…"
Not waiting for an answer I walk past Harry and into the corridor of the train. I walk to a private section before coming to a stop, leaning against the wall. I press my hand to my chest, trying to get my breathing under control.
The last time I saw Harry was ten years ago when he was just a baby. I remember James and Lily fussing over him as they fed him. I remember how worried they were about their son. One day, they pulled Sirius and I aside.
"I want you to promise us something," James started.
I glanced at Lily and saw the tears in her eyes. I looked at Sirius and was glad to see he realised this was a serious conversation.
"If something happens to us," James says.
Sirius' nostrils flare up as he goes to interrupt.
"No, I mean it."
I lay a hand on my lover's arm, looking him in the eyes. He relaxes and nods at James.
"If something happens to us," James repeats. "You two need to promise to look after Harry. Keep him safe."
I want to protest that he would hardly be safe around me, but the look on everyone's faces stops me.
"I promise," I say eventually.
Sirius agrees.
I let a tear fall as I realise that I failed them. The first time I see Harry again, I fail to keep him safe. I slam my hand against the wall in frustration. If only Sirius were here, we could've raised Harry ourselves. We could've saved him from his misery at the Dursley's. But then I catch myself. Sirius isn't here anymore. No matter how much I wish he was, I know he is no longer my friend. No longer my lover. He betrayed James and Lily, and I lost them. I lost him. Despite my best efforts though, I still can't bring myself to hate him. How could the boy who was always smiling and cracking jokes capable of betraying his best friend to Voldemort? How could the boy who always stuck by my side during my transformations be evil? I wring my head in defeat. Somewhere in the back of my mind though, I hear him. The good him.
Don't give up Moony. Keep Harry safe from further harm. You can do that.
Taking a deep breath, I steady myself. The tears stop falling, and I wipe them away with the back of my hand. I fix my ragged clothes and stand up straight. His words trigger something in me, and with a new resolve, I head back towards the compartment that contains the son of one of my best friends. This time, with determination to make sure he doesn't get hurt again.
For them.
Thank you so much for reading guys. I hope this was alright. I was thinking about the scene, so I decided to write this. As I said before, this is just a one-shot, so I won't be continuing. If you haven't already though, check out my other story, The Potters Twin. I'm still in the process of writing it, but hopefully what's there already is good.