whiskerface: thank you so much! It makes me so happy to read that!

Welp, time to finish up this arc! Next time, we get into reviewer requests :)

Entry 103

It was not Astrid who found me and Toothless. It was my dad… and for the first time since I woke up, he's angry.

Toothless and I were awoken this morning by the sound of yelling. I opened my eyes to see my father standing above us, my fake leg in his hand, and he looked really, really upset. Like, the kind of upset that used to scare me.

"For Thor's sake, Hiccup, we've been looking for you all night!" He yelled.

"I'm sorry, I thought Astrid w-"

"Do you know how worried I've been? I thought something bad had happened to you! I heard about your little fight with Snotlout yesterday, and I thought maybe you'd let it get to your head or something. I know you've thought about running away before, and I was scared it actually happened!" He sounded almost hysterical, in a way I'd never heard before. "And then when Astrid brought me your leg and said she thought you'd have been back by then, I thought something even worse had happened!"

I held out a hand, trying to process everything through my still waking mind. "Woah, woah, Dad, slow down." He finally stopped. "I… I'm sorry I scared you, but I'm okay. Really. I just… needed some time to think, that's all."

"I understand that, Hiccup. But you have to tell me first! I can't spend an entire night fearing for your safety like this. I need to know you're alright, son, not be left in the dark again!"

Something about that statement made me snap, and I suddenly found myself just as angry as my father. "Oh, well you were perfectly fine with it before! You couldn't care less where I went or when I came back!"

"I don't have time for this, Hiccup-"

"Why not? Because you know it's true?" I cut him off. "I spent DAYS away from home all the time, and you never came looking then!" I forced myself up, holding onto Toothless for balance. Even if my dad still towered over me, I needed to be a little closer to his level. "So, what changed? Why do you suddenly care when I leave without telling you where I'm going? Why does it matter where I am? Huh? I thought you WANTED me gone!"

My dad said nothing.

"Answer me!" I yelled, though my voice had turned from anger to almost pleading. Yet still, he didn't reply.

Hurt, I just swiped my prosthetic from his hand, swiftly tying the rope and walking away. From behind me, I heard Toothless whine, but I didn't turn back. I just climbed up the pathway I made when I first started visiting Toothless, and kept going, all the way to the crash site. When I got the Tree, I climbed up onto the branch Toothless lost his tailfin on, leaning back against the trunk and trying to get my thoughts in order.

Here I was, thinking we were finally through all this, but of course, the past had to worm its way in and ruin things. The truth was, I really was touched that he spent an entire night searching for me… But then that led me to question why he didn't before. I know the answer, of course, but that doesn't mean it doesn't still hurt.

From my left, I heard the muffled sound of Toothless' screech, and after a moment, he appeared from the brush, my dad on his back. Dad hopped off his saddle, hesitating a moment before speaking. "You… heh, you've got to teach me how to work that thing. I didn't think we'd make it past the cliff," he said, trying too hard to make a joke in some attempt to ease the tension.

"I don't want to talk right now," I said quietly.

"I know," Dad sighed. "And you don't have to. Just listen. Please." His eyes met mine, which, from on my branch, were almost exactly level with his. "Not a day goes by when I don't feel guilty for how you grew up. And I… I deserved every word you said to me. I just… I'm trying to be better, Hiccup. I don't want to make the same mistakes I made for so long, I want you to feel like you have a place in our family, in Berk. I want to make up for everything I've done to you, to us. I… I want things to be like when you were little again. And as much as I know I don't deserve it, I want your forgiveness."

"I already forgave you, Dad," I said. "I just… I need some time. Forgiving doesn't mean forgetting, and I need to think about some things, and accept others." I glanced at Toothless, but had to look away upon seeing the concern and sadness in his eyes. "But I'm sorry, too. For losing my cool like that. I should have thought before I spoke."

"It's okay, son." Dad engulfed my hand in his, giving it a reassuring squeeze. "Shall we head home?" After a moment, I nodded, and he helped me down from the Tree. Then, we started our trek back to Berk, and the whole time, his arm was around my shoulders.

Until next time…

-H