Chapter Twenty-Two

Another day in the life

A/N Another installment of the WWS, this one will be a little shorter, because Selfless has a lot of flashbacks, and I think they're perfect enough. Plus I'm gonna do a life of Anya with flashbacks story at some point so.

Sunnydale, the world without shrimp 2002

"Say what everyone else says, wear what everyone else is wearing." Dawn said as she picked out different tank tops from the chest of drawers, Aww it's kinda sweet that Dawn's giving me advice, oh hello, Tara's looking at me. They were standing around in Willow and Tara's room, Buffy had sent Dawn up there to distract them, as she was too talkative to keep downstairs. Buffy needed time to clear her head, not much had really happened monster-wise to distract her so her mind had been focussing on Spike, and what to do about his little, insane problem.

"Okay." Willow agreed, it was best to just let Dawn be Dawn, and her excitement was a little adorable. So Dawn was fidgeting around trying to help Willow pick out what said 'I'm a cool college chick' for her first day back tomorrow. It wasn't as nerve racking as Willow had thought it would be, Tara had said she'd come along with her before her history class. Moral support you know. Although she probably didn't need it, it was nice to know her girlfriend would be on hand to calm her nerves whenever she decided to have any. This would soon prove to be an invaluable excuse for more snuggling later that night.

Dawn was talking about a million miles an hour, all words flying out in awkward directions. She's just being her usual bubbly self, Willow thought as she turned her head towards Tara, who was leaning against the headboard, smirking slightly. It was nice to see Dawn so excited about something, she seemed like that recently, maybe high school was having an untoward effect on the littlest Summers no one was really sure how long this happy spell was going to last so everyone was enjoying it as much as they could, humouring her for all it was worth.

Tara was smirking because there was a slight fantasy rolling around her brain at that very moment, and it involved Willow and some coat closets. Now that they would both be in college again, there were many exciting prospects for making out spots. Not that Tara was completely bemusing herself with thoughts of Willow-lips on her own; no she was thinking about how nervous Willow must be about starting classes again. Yes, thinking about that, totally. And totally not about nibbling on her earlobe. Running my fingers up and down her thighs, as she moans into me... TARA! Brain geez, stop.

Willow started giggling, she could hear Tara's inner rambling, that always happened when they didn't intend it to. She looked over at Tara's smirky face with an equally intrigued one, raising an eyebrow in response to the dirty fantasies playing around inside the blonde's head. But then both of them noticed Dawn was still in the room and decided now was not the best time to discuss this openly, so the telepathy continued.

Baby, maybe tonight you could live out that fantasy? Willow thought, making Tara blush heavily and look down, the fact Willow had heard her, was kinda sexy, but at the same time, she really shouldn't be thinking those things with Dawn in the room. Then Dawn seemed to notice something going on between them and interjected.

"Are you guys doing the talking without speaking thing again? Because this is very important stuff I'm saying here." She said, flicking her head back and forth between the now rather flushed pair of witches.

Willow looked down before letting Tara take this question, she knew how to handle Dawn better. "No sweetie, absolutely not we're listening to every word trust me." Tara lied through her teeth, it wasn't strictly correct to lie to her, but the truth would be much more scarring for the sixteen year old. It would just be too weird for her to think of them that way, they were kinda like surrogate parents to her.

"Ok ok whatever, so Willow are you all set?" Dawn replied, looking back down at the clothes now neatly laid out on the bed, obviously they would shortly be removed once Dawn had left the room, but she needn't know that. So Dawn nodded proficiently and walked out the door, and downstairs in search of pizza. The door swinging lightly on its hinges as Willow put down any extra clothing she was holding and crawled over to where Tara was sitting.

Her limbs moved towards Tara, spreading her legs she sat on her lap, straddling her as she brought her arms around the back of Tara's neck. She smiled, flicking from Willow's lips to her eyes and back again, the green capturing her attention before crashing their lips together in a tender but soft kiss. They couldn't hold their lust in apparently. Breaking the kiss Willow looked back at her girlfriend with an interesting crease on her lips, a creative smile that interlocked their thoughts. Her lips trailing down the blonde's jawline, nipping at the supple flesh she found beneath her. Tara was moaning Willow's name softly into the air as she breathed husky, words from her parted lips.

"Willow..." Willow moaned into the darkness, half asleep, Tara's caressing arm draped over her own. She heard the soft noises leaking from Willow's mouth, lifting her head off the pillow she pulled her closer, bridging the space between them as her arms wrapped around the sleeping redhead. Pressing a gentle kiss to the back of her neck.

"Wil," she whispered tenderly, her voice a gentle lullaby that swayed effortlessly. "Why're you moaning your own name?" Willow rolled over slightly, nuzzling gently into Tara's touch, the feel of her warm body against her was cosy. She loved the comfort Tara provided, she was like a big warm cuddly thing that was permanently ok with being completely overrun with Willow-limbs

"Not me, you. You were." Willow whispered back, her lips colliding with Tara's nose, it was gentle, just a little crash between them as they bumped into each other in the dark. It happened at the best of times, as she settled back into the mattress and the gentle caress of fingers roaming her flesh. Tara made a soft 'mm' sound as she closed the minute gap between them with a sleepy kiss. Wetting their lips and making Willow want for more, more Tara that's what was best.

"Oh you mean like this." Tara moaned Willow's name into her ear, making her squirm under the sheets and give a light unadulterated moan back, as she leant in for another kiss. Tara was just too delectable for her to resist, too irresistible and cute. She deserved so much more than to be caring for a magick junkie.

"Willow." Tara moaned again, this time a little more stern, there was a seriousness to her voice. She must have overheard Willow's rambling tired little brain and felt the need to butt in. "Sweetie, it's not about what I should or shouldn't deserve, I chose you, magicky you, and I'll never take that back, ever. I love you Willow Rosenberg, even if you are a little hyped up sometimes." Tara's sweetness kind of radiated, and it always made Willow feel better, even if she never truly believed the words.

Bodies coated the furniture, littered amongst the empty heart remnants and blood pools. There were twelve or ten or more. The creature was gone, it skedaddled when it's duty was done, it had tortured them. Ripping the vessels from their veins, civil blood made civil hands unclean. Deep gashed cavities embedded into the flesh of their sweater covered chests. The heady breathing had slowed hours before, life draining from civil eyes as washed away blood seeps a little further into the carpet.

Anya lay amidst the calm chaos. Her back slumped against the wall, blood coating her limber thighs, and a smattering across her cheek, just a little. She sat alone in the darkness, a wash of pain and misery overtaking her sad eyes. The bright love-filled embers they used to be was gone, only replaced by a slick unhunger for vengeance. An emptiness. She felt nothing for these dead boys but somehow they all stained her. She wouldn't ever know their names, the girl, whoever she was. Would never know forgiveness for her cruel wish. Her mind erasing her thoughts over and over again until she could no longer see the blood, sleep having beaten her.

The sink was cold, she washed her hands of the blood, but it was still dirty. Red blotchy stains coating the inside of her eyelids with the memory. Cataracts she couldn't undo without forgiveness. Anya shouldn't feel this way, her body shouldn't want to crumble into dust at the sight of her own doing. But it did. Xander had starved her, craved her of the feelingless shell she'd become so long ago. The strength she'd conjured after her first heartbreak. Olaf's betrayal had shown her the true actions of man and she wanted rid. She wanted out. Out of the piteous life of reality, she wanted more. To have control.

Now she was powerless. She told herself she didn't need him to function, that she could live life alone. What she had done for centuries, Anyanka the great. But no. She craved him, she was this loving soul locked away untouched. And he had hell to pay for it. Scrubbing the ache away from her dress she cleaned her face. Forcing a trench coat over her breakable body, she walked scarred from the house. Her feet padding the ground as she walked, a waling screech inside her head from where the monster's cries still lurked beneath her skin. Her almost soulless body gripping to life as she trod.

*Flashback* Sunnydale, the world without shrimp 1999

He was being a doofus, he was always being a doofus. But this time she saw his disappointment, the obvious rejection at finding out he wasn't the class of '99s class clown was clearly having a draining side effect. They'd somehow managed to trail out of the party, he was leading her down one of the abandoned hallways. Perhaps her was taking her home, he did look smart, like a gentleman.

Xander's tux was black, like every other normal tuxedo could be. Except on him it seemed fitter, nicer, made him look rather gorgeous. Anya, what. You asked him because you just wanted to have a date, you don't like like him do you? Anya whispered to herself, her arm swinging down beside her casually. It swept across his palm in a gentle caress, leaving her tingly. This was something she'd buried, a feeling not felt since she was last human, her original life. But it was never like this anyway. She'd never cared about how a guy thought of her before. And here she was, walking through an empty corridor, at her high school prom like some kind of normal eighteen year old girl.

When they'd danced she'd held his hand, their foreheads had mingled too, pressed tight against the other. He'd been holding her waist, it was new, a new dancing feeling. So old and yet her life had become so repetitive and driven she'd forgotten what true feeling was like. It had blurred before, now it was leaking. They stopped walking and took an awkward glance at each other. Xander gave his usual socially restrained half forced toothy smile. Which Anya returned, gritting her teeth slightly at his awkwardness, and at her own.

Then he was kissing her, a slow built up lilt of tension eased through her. How long she'd waited for a new first kiss was unbearable at that moment. His lips applied to hers in a cool shade of peach. His tongue slipped towards hers, fumbling through his parted lips and into her mouth. She suckled on it, somehow he moaned. Breaking the kiss he looked back at her surprised. Blinking a few times before fumbling some more with his mouth, then there were words.

"Ok, wow." He said, slightly pretending he hadn't just said that. She smiled coyly and looked down at their now interlocked hands. When the spell finally broke he brought his hand up and pointed, the way he usually would, with his index finger.

"No, you only asked me because you were lonely, you think men are evil. And you used to be a demon, why can't I meet normal girls?" He mumbled more to himself than her, but she heard him loud and clear. Then Anya and Xander did what they do best, they fought. There were several shouts about his cursing of demons, and who was he anyway to judge her. He'd had a crush on a praying mantis, oh yes, Anya had heard about that one from Cordelia. And then there was the mummy, and then you know, Willow. The geek. Not exactly the most normal bunch.

So they fought and kissed and fought some more, just as old married couples do. They're Xander and Anya, why not?