13
No one in the Rebellion dared disturbed Ahsoka or Barriss during the remainder of their journey back to Dantooine. Barriss was extremely grateful for this as she knew Ahsoka needed all the privacy she could get given what she had just discovered about her former Master. There was no one else on board besides Barriss that could possibly understand a fraction of the pain Ahsoka was feeling right now. Yet, this fact also saddened the Mirialan in that she still felt that she was a horrible candidate to be the Togruta's source of comfort despite having saved her life. In a way, Barriss had hurt Ahsoka like Anakin now has in similar ways. Despite having earned Ahsoka's forgiveness and now love, guilt plagued Barriss like an infection that refused to heal. It ensnared Barriss's heart and mind much like the Geonosian parasite that once infected her and the pressure was overwhelming.
Taking a moment to use the refresher to splash cool water on her face in hopes of quieting the noise in her head, Barriss desperately tries to calm herself for Ahsoka's sake. With a pained smile on her face, Barriss silently thanks her own Master for having taught her grounding techniques to keep her from completely spiraling. She reluctantly glances up at her exhausted expression reflected in the mirror, tightly gripping the countertop below her. The washed out blue color in her eyes and the dark circles forming just underneath revealed so much. Barriss then lightly brushes her fingers over the long, jagged scar that ran down her chest, where Anakin, no-Vader nearly cut her heart out. He may as well have, for she has lost so much within the day.
Luminara was in her grasp. Just hours ago, Barriss was curled against Luminara's chest and clinging onto her jumpsuit as they fled from Vader. After years of wondering and praying, the long lost Padawan had been reunited with her Master in every way. Physically and spiritually. And yet she still came back empty.
The newest Dark Lord of the Sith was revealed to be Anakin, Ahsoka's Master, and Barriss couldn't save him either. Barriss is content with the man she once splashed in the ponds of Anison with, hating her. As much as the young woman would give anything to return to the days where she and Anakin were close, Barriss understood Anakin's animosity. She'd hate herself too if she were in his position and admittedly that was still the case. Quinlan may have guided her through her spiritual trails, but it will take time for Barriss to look at herself in the mirror and smile.
Now observing the few streaks of grey shining through her dark hair, Barriss lets out a hard laugh.
"Well Master, you were right. The stress would catch up to me!"
Hot tears then welled up and fell to the floor as Barriss began to sob. With a sharp inhale, she looks over her shoulder half-expecting Luminara to be there as she always was whenever she was in distress. In her mind's eye, Barriss could see Luminara's kind violet eyes looking at her with so much love and understanding and she imagined her Master's arm's around her.
"I really wish you were here Master!" Barriss chokes out, tears continuing to pour down her olive cheeks, "I need you to tell me what to do...because I don't know if I can do this. Ahsoka needs me and I'm falling apart!"
Knowing Luminara's voice would never come, Barriss slides down to the ground and buries her face in her knees.
"I'm so sorry Master, I'm being selfish. You're suffering too, maybe even dying, and I failed in getting you out and yet I still want you."
Barriss begins to feel herself hyperventilate, her breath becoming more shallow as the image of Luminara pushing her to safety flashed before her eyes. Remembering that Ahsoka was still just outside, Barriss places a hand over her chest in an attempt to regain her breath and slow her heart rate. How many times in their time together during the war has Luminara walked in and coached Barriss back into relaxation? More than Barriss could count, but she would do anything to have her Master walk in on her once more.
Taking another deep breath, Barriss whimpers to herself, "I need you…I need you to tell me what to do…"
And for the next several minutes, all Barriss could do was repeat the phrase "I need you" as she continued to weep. She needed to get all the tears from her system out before facing Ahsoka again. After all, Barriss was Ahsoka's lover now. Until her last dying breath, Barriss shall be the strong woman Ahsoka deserves. Had the roles been reversed, Barriss knew Ahsoka would do the same. She needed to pull herself together.
By the grace of her training, Barriss was finally able to collect her bearings and recompose herself to join Ahsoka's side. Ahsoka still remained in bed, her eyes staring blankly into the ceiling. The sight made Barriss's already fractured heart break again as she laid herself next to the Togruta. A green hand laces an orange one and squeezes it as Barriss wanted to remind Ahsoka that she was still here for her. Ahsoka's lip twitches into a quick small smile before retreating back into her thoughts. Barriss lays her head on Ahsoka's shoulder, feeling the Padawan beads she carried in her cloak pocket weight heavier by the moment.
Barriss had hoped to have reunited Ahsoka with them while she still had good memories of Anakin in her mind, yet fate had other plans. Even though Ahsoka rightfully demanded the answer from Barriss, telling the truth was eating away at the Mirialan. Barriss knows Anakin's turn was not her fault, but she did fight against him for the second time. Sure, it was in the name of protecting Ahsoka and saving Luminara, but nonetheless it killed her. Barriss couldn't help but wonder how she would feel if she found out Ahsoka and Luminara clashed. The thought of the two most important women in her life dueling one another was enough to nauseate her, so Barriss immediately dropped it and started to think of something else.
It deeply troubled Barriss that she had the power to bring Ahsoka back to life, but there was nothing that could be done when it came to emotional trauma. More than anything, Barriss wished it was her looking wordlessly at the ceiling instead. Ahsoka has suffered enough.
Pressing a kiss onto Ahsoka's cheek, Barriss makes the internal vow to herself that she will carry for years to come.
"Anakin...I don't know where you are and what you plan on doing, but rest assured should you ever harm Ahsoka, we shall meet again, and this time I won't hold back."
Barriss's touch was the one element keeping Ahsoka rooted as she feels herself drifting farther and farther away from reality with each passing minute. She wishes she could kiss Barriss, to completely melt into her and take her breath away, but Ahsoka couldn't. The reason why Ahsoka's eyes were glued to the ceiling above was that she could not bear to look at Barriss's scar on her chest. Anakin may as well sliced open her chest too seeing that he had no issue in scarring the very individual that was her whole heart. Right now she was a prisoner of her own mind, her brain flooding with memories of herself with Anakin at a rate Ahsoka could barely keep up with. Before receiving confirmation of Darth Vader being Anakin, such memories were a source of comfort. But not right now.
It's been said that there are multiple stages of grief with denial being the first, anger in the middle, and eventually acceptance at the very end. Yet, in Ahsoka's case, it appeared she made the jump straight to anger. There was never any denial of what possibly happened, rather there was always hope. Hope that Anakin in the end would rise above his feelings and make the right choice. But Ahsoka knows what she had heard the moment before Rex turned his blasters on her. She heard Mace's pleas, she felt him die, and she saw Anakin giving in to something and that something was the reason why she had to fight for her life and bury several of her Clone brothers that day.
No, there was never denial. Hearing Barriss's story just validates that sneaking suspicion that has laid dormant in the deepest depths of her soul and that is where the anger comes in. Anakin has almost killed Barriss twice now and the evidence of that would forever be on the Mirialan's body and in her memory.
"It should have been me." Ahsoka thinks to herself, her hands balling into fists to which Barriss takes both her hands into her own.
Ahsoka can still feel Barriss's lips on her cheeks and her strong, steady pulse from squeezing her hand so tight, but she still couldn't turn her head to face her. All Ahsoka can see right now is herself facing Vader. She sees herself howling at him, lashing out with her twin white blades, with every strike Ahsoka screaming all the things she's been wanting to get off her chest for years now.
There were so many instances in her apprenticeship where her Master seemed to have cast her aside for his own selfishness, perhaps not intentionally, but stung nonetheless. Most of the time, her relationship with her Master seemed to have followed the usual give and take, both parties feeling taken care of and respected. Yet as the Clone wars dragged on, Ahsoka began to notice more things being taken from her rather than given.
How many times had Ahsoka been left to her own devices because Anakin had to flee in a matter regarding Padme or Palpatine? The amount of lies Ahsoka said to Obi-wan or Rex or a member of the Council to cover her Master? Or bearing witness to Anakin letting his anger rule him in the battlefields to disturbing lengths? All of that devotion only to get abandoned the moment she was framed for a crime she'd never commit. Such loyalty, only for the woman she loved to get attacked and nearly slaughtered twice. If Ahsoka could wash her hands free from such knowledge, she would because despite Anakin becoming the very creature they had sought out to destroy, the very enemy he had trained her to fight against, she still loved him. As much as it hurt, Ahsoka could never stop loving Anakin.
How could she not?
Her Master had taught her everything she had used to survive. He held her and comforted her whenever she needed it and spoiled her when he could. Ahsoka has always known her Master loved her and would do anything for her despite his flaws. Oh, what Ahsoka wouldn't do to go back in time and relive those glory days. The days where she'd shake Anakin awake to go practice sparring and eat breakfast afterwards, the quiet afternoons where the two of them would tinker with things, and the thrilling evenings where Anakin would give Ahsoka flying lessons up in the glittering Coruscanti night sky.
Anakin's bright blue eyes and infectious smile never fail to get her beaming back. All the relentless teasing Master Obi-wan would endure from Anakin that always made her laugh until her stomach hurt. The immediate gratifying feeling of relief whenever Ahsoka heard Anakin's voice over comlink whenever she was in danger. Just as the Jedi always believed, the good always outweighed the bad and in the end, Ahsoka would not have traded Anakin for a Master for anything. If she had to do it all over again, she'd still pick Anakin over and over again.
Ahsoka loves Anakin and she always will.
One day she'll accept all that has happened and move on. But at the moment, Ahsoka knew she needed to feel her anger and push through it before she can begin to forgive what Anakin has done to her, to Barriss, to the Jedi Order, and to the galaxy.
"Anakin...How could you? I know I've hurt you and I've left you, which is why you should have cut me down instead of Barriss. Why did it have to be her?! She was your friend and you knew what I felt for her…"
Ahsoka didn't notice the tears falling from her eyes, but she felt Barriss embrace her and rock her gently as she cried.
"Master...I'm not sure if I'll ever have the strength to face you, but should we meet, I promise you that I will do whatever it takes to free us both. I love you Anakin...but I'm hurting and I wish this was all just a bad dream. That any moment, I'll wake up and see you and you'll tell me everything's alright and that you're there for me. I hope wherever you are, you know I'm alive and that I'm living in a dark and dangerous universe you helped create. Is this what you really wanted for me Master? Or has Vader really destroyed you as Barriss has said?"
"Ahsoka…" Barriss whispers soothingly, still holding onto the Togruta tight.
Hearing Barriss's voice again finally allowed Ahsoka to snap out of it. She looks up to see that Barriss's eyes were just as puffy as her own, having presumably been crying as well. Without thinking twice, Ahsoka rises to kiss Barriss and thumb the last of the tears.
Upon pulling away for air, Ahsoka presses her forehead against Barriss's.
"Barriss, I'm so sorry. Thank you for being here even though you're hurting just as much as I am."
Barriss's face softens, "Don't you dare worry about me right now. All that matters to me right now is being by your side."
Ahsoka cups Barriss' face and kisses her forehead, "I will always worry about you, you are my life now. Honestly I think I would break if I didn't have you."
Barriss shakes her head, "That's not true, you're too strong for anything to get you down. I've seen you spring right back up too many times for me not to believe that."
Ahsoka's face hardens into a serious expression with her tone of voice matching.
"Barriss, if something had happened to you...I would not be okay. I can't even look at your scar without feeling ashamed."
Barriss opens her mouth to protest, but Ahsoka stops her.
"I know I wasn't the one to do it, but it was my Master that did and again that was not the first time. It should have been me confronting him, not you."
"Ahsoka, stop." Barriss interjects gently. "We both need to stop blaming ourselves for things that are beyond our control."
"You say that as if you weren't just crying over losing your Master again." Ahsoka counters, causing Barriss's breath to hitch.
"You heard that?"
"No, but I sensed your thoughts and was able to put the two and two together." Ahsoka says with a saddened expression. "I was too wrapped up in my own misery to help and I'm sorry for that."
Barriss lays her head on Ahsoka's shoulder, "It's okay love, I think it was best for us to feel our emotions ourselves before we could be of any use to each other. At least that's what Luminara always told me whenever I felt upset about something."
Ahsoka smiles at the mention of the Mirialan Jedi Master.
"We're going to save her Barriss, one way or another."
"I hope so." Barriss says with a shaky exhale, her sadness quickly seeping into the Force around them.
With a sympathetic look, Ahsoka pulls Barriss to where the Mirialan would be sitting on her lap with both arms wrapped around her. There was a time where Ahsoka took it upon herself to read up on how to comfort someone with anxiety or depression after seeing Barriss look so withdrawn in their time together at the Temple. She remembers how important it was for an individual to feel secure when triggered and that's what Ahsoka wanted to be for Barriss right now. A safe place for Barriss to reset herself before the next adventure happens.
Just as Barriss's breathing relaxed into a more normal rhythm, Bail enters the room looking slightly embarrassed for having walked in.
"I'm sorry to interrupt, but we are just able to land back on base and we've just received contact that Senator Chuchi has arrived on Dantooine."
Ahsoka perks up, "Riyo? But how?!"
Bail shrugs, "Perhaps the universe decided to give us a break. I'm sure we'll get a story once we arrive."
"Forgive me, but was this Riyo in danger?" Barriss asks, trying to think if she knew a Senator by that name.
"Just before I confronted Palpatine on Pantora, she was captured by the Inquisitor and sent away." Ahsoka quickly elaborates. "The question is, how was she able to escape Imperial custody unscathed. I mean don't get me wrong, Riyo is pretty self sufficient, but even we struggle against them."
Barriss raises a brow, "You don't think she could have been followed? Perhaps we're walking into a trap?"
Ahsoka nods, "Barriss has a point, how long has Riyo been on Dantooine?"
"From what I know, she had just arrived. We'll just have to see for ourselves when we land." Bails answers with a tinge of worry.
Ahsoka laughs, "For Barriss and I's sake, I truly hope there's not another catastrophe waiting for us."
Barriss could not agree more.
The decision had just been made for Obi-wan to go confront General Grievous on Utapau much to Anakin's displeasure. Right as the Council adjourned their meeting, Obi-wan intended on pulling Anakin aside to talk about what had just happened, but his ears picked up on Master Windu speaking with Master Yoda on the upcoming droid attack on Kashyyyk. It wasn't the battle itself that grabbed his attention, it was the name of the accompanying Jedi that would be going with Yoda that did; Luminara and Quinlan. Not only were his two best friends being commissioned to go to what sounded like an intense battle, but it sounded like they were leaving soon, just like he was, and Obi-wan was not going anywhere without saying goodbye to his beloved. Especially when there was a question he's been dying to ask her since their recent reunion.
Obi-wan quickly approaches Anakin and tells him to meet him at the shipyard where he'd be departing after his meeting with the Chancellor before turning on his heel to speak to Mace.
"Forgive me Master, but did you say Master Unduli was going off world?"
With a surprised look on his face, the Grandmaster answers,"Master Unduli and Master Vos are about to depart to Kashyyyk to assist Master Yoda, why?"
Obi-wan bows and turns to exit the Council chamber, "Thank you Master, if you'll excuse me!"
Mace and Yoda shared a brief look of confusion before continuing to discuss the upcoming battles.
"Please don't be gone, please don't be gone!" Obi-wan thinks to himself frantically as he sped through the Temple looking for any sign of Luminara. He had already checked her personal quarters and his own as well as her other known locations such as the Temple gardens but she wasn't there. The man even went as far as going to Barriss's old room where he often found Luminara in there crying or meditating. Obi-wan knew rationally that if Yoda was still on site then Luminara would still be too, but not seeing her anywhere made his heart jump to his throat nonetheless.
And then just as the Force itself knew that he was about to run out of steam, Obi-wan hears Quinlan's voice just outside the Temple entrance. He whips his head around to see Quinlan and Luminara beginning their descent down the steps, no doubt towards their ships they would be leaving in.
"'Nara…"
There was no time to waste. Abusing his power in Force to quickly catch up to his friends, Obi-wan calls out to his love before she could take another step.
"Luminara! Wait!"
This startles both Quinlan and Luminara as they were surprised to see their friend look so flustered.
"Cool your jets Kenobi, we're not leaving just yet!" Quinlan teases, but he gets no reaction from the man as Obi-wan's eyes were glued to the woman beside him.
Luminara takes a step back up, taking Obi-wan's hands into her own.
"Darling what is it?"
"You were going to leave without saying goodbye?" Obi-wan asks, still catching his breath.
"Of course not dear. I knew you'd be in a meeting and I would not have left Coruscant without saying goodbye!" Luminara reassures blushing. "That would be going against our promise to each other after all."
Obi-wan nearly blows their cover by leaning towards Luminara's face as if to kiss her but Quinlan loudly clears his throat to stop it.
"Okay! Time to take this party somewhere more private, unless you were planning on giving me a kiss too Obi-wan?"
Obi-wan and Luminara agreed with Quinlan by nodding, both completely red in the face. It took everything inside Quinlan not to burst out laughing and embarrass Obi-wan more, but he decided to take the high road and give his friends the space they needed.
Placing a hand on both of his friend's backs, Quinlan guides them all back inside the Temple.
"Okay, well let's go back inside, find an empty room for two to talk, and I'll keep watch for Master Yoda? I'm sure we still have time on our hands."
"Thank you, Quinlan." Luminara manages to say, still fanning herself over what has just almost happened.
"Anything for you Lumi. Obi-wan, you on the other hand, owe me." Quinlan says nudging the aforementioned man.
"Ha, ha." was all Obi-wan could say.
Finding a nearby empty meditation chamber, Quinlan practically shoves the couple inside, laughing at how embarrassed the two still were.
"I really don't like that guy sometimes!" Obi-wan says before being cut off by Luminara kissing him, wrapping her arms around his neck.
Obi-wan happily reciprocates the gesture, pulling Luminara close to where he could feel her heartbeat flutter against his own. The fact he could ignite such a response in Luminara will never cease to please him. They both had the power to manipulate the world around them, but Obi-wan has become very proud of his ability to make Luminara feel alive, no Jedi mind trick required. This was why Obi-wan needed to end Grievous's rule once and for all. So that he could spend the rest of his life loving the most perfect woman in the galaxy.
They pull away for air, laughing like giddy younglings as they press their foreheads together.
"Well that was a sweet, unexpected surprise." Obi-wan says, enjoying the pink flush that was still present on Luminara's cheeks.
Luminara cocks an eyebrow, "You started it. I don't think I've ever been both thrilled and terrified in my entire life."
Obi-wan kisses the crown of Luminara's head, "I'm sorry to have frightened you, my dear. You just looked so beautiful in the morning light, I couldn't resist."
Luminara gives him a playful smack on the shoulder, "Master Jinn would never live this one down and I'm sure Quinlan isn't going to let me forget it either!"
The two shared another laugh before Obi-wan informed Luminara of his new mission, causing the woman to take a seat with a sad expression on her face. Obi-wan sits beside her.
"What's wrong? You're about to go into one of the biggest battles this war has seen and you're worried about me and Grievous? If anything you should be comforting me!"
Luminara's lip twitches, "It's not that I don't believe you won't succeed, I just can't hear of Grievous without thinking of him scaring and almost killing Barriss during the first Geonosis battle and all the Jedi that monster has killed thereafter."
Obi-wan takes Luminara's hand and kisses it, "I know my love. All the more reason I want to do it. I want to defeat the very thing that stands between us and peace and avenge the heartache this damn war has inflicted upon you and Barriss…and Ahsoka… and Anakin."
It was Luminara's turn to give a reassuring kiss on the cheek, "And you too. We've all lost too much."
Obi-wan turns to meet her gaze, "But I've gotten you out of it. Quinlan better take good care of you while you're on Kashyyyk because there's no point in winning this if I don't get to hold you again."
Luminara rolls her eyes and laughs, "I also happen to be a Jedi Master too, I'm sure I'll be fine!"
Obi-wan tucks a stray ebony bang back into Luminara's headdress, "I already miss you…"
"Win the war and we won't be apart very long." Luminara purrs back, squeezing Obi-wan's hand. She looks back up to see something unfamiliar in her lover's eyes. Obi-wan was withholding something from her and from the look of it, something very important.
"There's something more...what is it?"
Obi-wan takes both of Luminara's hands into his own, a soft smile lighting his face up. It made Luminara's heart skip a beat as all of his smiles do.
"There's something I've been wanting to ask you for a very long time and I thought we would have more time together here and I could make this a little more romantic, but here we are."
Obi-wan then stands up and kneels before Luminara causing the Mirialan to gasp, tears of joy already welling in her eyes, knowing exactly where this was going.
"Oh Obi-wan…"
"Luminara Unduli, I know I've told you this many times, but I say it because it's true and you deserve to hear it every day, you are the love of my life. If there's anything this life has taught me, it's that we have to hold onto the things that make overcoming the losses worth it. For the last thirteen years, especially these last three, you've been my guiding light through all the darkness. I know we're Jedi but after everything we've been through, I think it's time we live the life we've fought so hard for.
I don't want to hide my love for you anymore. When this is all over, I want to come home to you every night and I want you to be the first thing I see in the mornings. I want to rebuild our little family. I want our next adventure to be finding Barriss and Ahsoka and bringing them back home so that we can heal as a team. I just want to be together always. Code be damned! We're proof that one can be a Jedi and in a committed loving relationship. It just wouldn't feel right to go forward without referring to you as my wife."
Obi-wan then reaches for the small diamond ring he's kept stashed away on his belt, the pocket closest to his lightsaber to be exact, as a symbolic reminder of what he was fighting for. It was a petite band made of Beskar with a trio of pear shaped stones in the center, two of them violet colored like Luminara's eyes with the center one a diamond.
Overwhelmed by Obi-wan's words and by what she was seeing, Luminara clasps both hands over her mouth to suppress the happy squeals that bubbled inside her. She could barely make out Obi-wan's serene smile through the tears that blurred her vision.
Chuckling, Obi-wan takes a moment to dry Luminara's face with a spare handkerchief, taking one of the Mirialan's trembling hands before sliding the ring into her finger.
"Luminara, will you marry me?"
Without a moment's hesitation, Luminara nods her head and seals her answer with a kiss.
"Yes! Of course I will marry you!"
Much to Luminara's delight, Obi-wan hoists her up and spins his now fiancee around before lowering her back down and embracing her, tears pricking his own eyes.
"This is the happiest moment of my life."
"I never thought I could feel this much peace ever again." Luminara says with just as much warmth, her body relaxing against Obi-wan's, taking full advantage of being able to breathe in his scent.
"Does it fit? The ring?" asks Obi-wan to which Luminara nods.
"Perfectly. It's so beautiful my love, I'm afraid to wear it into battle."
Obi-wan turns his head to make eye contact, "With your permission, I'd like to keep the ring here where it would be safe."
Luminara agrees and reluctantly returns the ring.
"I look forward to wearing that full time."
Obi-wan grins, "Me too, Lady Kenobi."
Quinlan then knocks on the door.
"Hey Lumi, it's time to go!"
"Alright just a minute!" Luminara yells back, her tone coming out more sad than intended.
"I suppose it's time to say goodbye."
Obi-wan grips Luminara's shoulders, "Not for long, remember?"
Luminara flashes a small smile and nods.
Obi-wan gently raises her chin up, "Call me whenever you can?"
"I'd be a lousy wife if I didn't."
Luminara teases.
"I love you so much, please be safe." Obi-wan says, stoking Luminara's face.
"I love you too Obi-wan. May the Force be with you…" Luminara echoes sincerely, her voice cracking.
Obi-wan leans down for one last kiss.
"It always is, as it is with you."
Taking a deep breath, Luminara gets on her tiptoes to land a final peck on Obi-wan's cheek.
"Walk me out?"
Obi-wan nods and follows suit much to Quinlan's relief who was about to knock on the door again. Seeing how happy the couple looked, instantly melted Quinlan's anxiety.
"You better tell everything when we get on board!" Quinlan says, holding a hand out to Luminara who accepts it.
"I always have, haven't I?" winked Luminara.
Quinlan gives Obi-wan a hard pat on the back.
"Good on you for giving our girl something to smile about!"
Under normal circumstances Obi-wan would want to banter, but at the moment, he was too happy to care. His eyes stayed only on Luminara as the trio made their way out of the Temple. Obi-wan was all too tempted to hold Luminara's hand as they walked, but he kept his composure.
They said farewell right at the spot where Obi-wan initially stopped his friends. Quinlan reassured Obi-wan that Luminara would be taken care of and wished him luck against Grievous as Luminara continued to mouth "I love you" repeatedly. Obi-wan returned the gesture with Quinlan with a bow, his chest aching as he saw his friend start to lead Luminara away. The couple locked eyes with each other until they could not. Luminara was the first to lose contact given their mass descent down the Temple steps, but Obi-wan stayed until he saw the two dots that he knew to be his friends disappear completely.
In an attempt to soothe the loneliness that crept up, Obi-wan hovers his hand over his pocket where Luminara's ring resides. Remembering the sight of the ring on her finger was enough to motivate Obi-wan to move again. The time has come to leave for his own mission.
But first, Obi-wan promised he'd speak with Anakin.
Having run out of tears to cry over Obi-wan and Quinlan's apparent capture, Luminara looks down to her hands, namely the one that once had a ring on it, Obi-wan's ring to her. Luminara hiccups at this, her heart all but shattered to dust. They were going to get married and from what the looks of it now, their wedding may forever remain a dream. Once again her loved ones have tried to rescue her only for the Empire to get in the way.
It was all so overwhelming.
After days of wondering what had become of Barriss and her two best friends, all three of them have tried coming to her aid all in the same day. Or perhaps it's been days. Luminara wasn't so sure as she had been unconscious for some time. It wasn't like anyone around here was going to give her an update.
And then there was Anakin.
Luminara was positive it had been Anakin to have taken her to her new prison. For reasons unknown to her, he has been sparing her life when he clearly had no trouble killing other Jedi. Her refusal of Vader seemed to have worked to her advantage when it came to saving Barriss's life. She was able to hold her hand out and Anakin had switched his blade off temporarily. There were numerous opportunities for the fallen Jedi to kill her, but he didn't. Luminara knows that Anakin wanted her to join his side, but she knows there was something more to the story.
"Anakin, why are you doing this? What do you want? I hope wherever you are, you're not planning on laying a finger on Barriss or Obi-wan...you've done enough!"
Barriss. Obi-wan.
Her heart shatters again remembering the look of helplessness and shock in Barriss's eyes as she pushed her towards the Rebels. It hurt Luminara beyond imagination to have pushed her little girl away especially after getting to hold her again after so much time apart, but it had to be done. It would have been selfish of her to attempt to go with her Padawan. Vader would have easily gotten them both as well as the innocents aboard that ship if she had tried.
So once again, as much as Luminara did not want to, she had to let go for Barriss's sake. Barriss, her dearest Padawan, her brave Jedi Knight. She could not be more proud of Barriss. Luminara knows that wherever Barriss is now, that she's beating herself up for "failing". But the Jedi Master meant it when she told her Padawan that she had already saved her. At last Luminara was free from speculation regarding Barriss's safety and well being. She had found her way back to the light, the light Luminara always knew Barriss had, and now her role was complete.
If she were to die today, Luminara would pass in peace knowing Barriss was going to be alright. Especially if Ahsoka Tano was still out there.
Then there was Obi-wan and Quinlan, two men Luminara would love to have holding her hands right now. The relief she feels knowing both of them have survived made her feel lighter than air. No matter what happens to her, Luminara hopes that Obi-wan and Quinlan stick together. They may have always had their differences, but Luminara knew they cared deeply for each other. She closes her eyes to say yet another silent prayer for them. Luminara knows both men are more than capable, but she still doesn't want the Empire touching them.
Luminara begins to imagine what life in hiding could be like, if she were to be rescued. She would finally get to be a bride and life could be no different than when they were younglings. Quinlan would no doubt want to walk her down the aisle towards Obi-wan, but he'd have to share with Barriss. Luminara would not marry without her daughter by her side.
What a perfect day that would be.
Right as Luminara was starting to find comfort in her daydreams, she hears her cell door hiss open to reveal the Inquisitor she recognized to be the one she fought back at the Imperial palace. All of Luminara's patience immediately dissipated.
"Oh, what is it this time? If you've come to finish our battle, you'd be doing me a favor."
Trilla freezes in response.
"I'm not here to kill you."
"Then what is it?" Luminara says icely, still not making eye contact.
"I wanted to talk."
This surprises Luminara. She turns to see the Inquisitor standing alone with no torture devices she could see. At this point, the Mirialan felt she had nothing to lose.
"I'm listening."
Trilla takes her helmet off, further deepening Luminara's shock. Upon recognizing the younger woman's face, Luminara sits up, her jaw dropped. She knew the human girl was a part of Barriss's creche and grew to become Master Junda's apprentice. If Luminara was remembering correctly, Trilla and Barriss had been friends.
"Padawan Trilla?"
Trilla nods, "Master Unduli."
Once again, the Jedi Master felt nothing but remorse at the sight of another fallen child.
"But...how? Why?"
"My Master betrayed me." Trilla snaps, her gold eyes flashing.
Luminara shakes her head. Impossible. Jedi Masters would rather die than surrender their Padawan.
"That can't be true…"
"But it is!" Trilla shouts back, her body beginning to shake.
Luminara extends a hand, "Trilla, it's okay. I don't wish to fight you, it's just that as a Jedi Master myself with a Padawan, a girl your age, I have difficulty seeing how things ended up this way for you."
Trilla says nothing. The look in the younger woman's eye reminded Luminara way too much of Barriss whenever she was struggling with something. It then dawned on the Mirialan that perhaps Trilla was seeking comfort from a motherly figure, something she had lost. Much like how Luminara briefly lost her own daughter.
Straightening herself up, Luminara reaches out to Trilla a second time in a more loving tone of voice.
"You said you wished to talk to me and thinking back to our last encounter together, I can see now that you were trying to get my attention, so why don't you tell me what's on your heart and maybe I can help? If Master Junda can't be here for you, I can."
"That's what I don't understand!" Trilla says, shaking her head in disbelief. "How is it that I, a Padawan that did everything she could to make her Master proud, gets betrayed to the Empire while your Padawan, Barriss, does the unthinkable, and yet you still love her and forgive her? How can that be?! What did Barriss do right that I did wrong?! Why didn't Cere love me the way you love Barriss!"
Trilla pauses to calm herself as she could feel her desperation rising to the surface. Even with Luminara looking at her with so much kindness in her eyes, Trilla shoves her emotions back down and uses it to fuel the anger, the darkness that never stops eating at her. It was as if Trilla was walking around with an open wound that bled endlessly.
"Before I answer that, Trilla, could you tell me what exactly happened to you? So that I know where you are coming from?" Luminara says, her heart aching for Trilla. Her mind goes to Barriss once more.
"Is this how Barriss felt? When she was locked away alone in prison and I wasn't able to see her? Did she feel that I did not love her? That I hated her? Oh, Barriss… I truly hope you knew that I was fighting for you sweetheart."
Trilla looked to be at war with herself. It was evident by the way her mouth twitched and the way her eyes avoided Luminara's that she was unsure whether or not to give into the Mirialan's request. Even in her weakened state, Luminara could feel the Inquisitor's turmoil and mentally prepared herself for the potential backlash she may receive.
Much to the Jedi Master's surprise, Trilla buckles and tells her of what had happened the night Order 66 was executed. How Trilla had tried to get her Master to stay with her with the younglings they had with them, but Cere chose to leave anyway with the hope of driving the Clones away and how within a matter of hours, Trilla was captured with the younglings she tried to protect getting shot right before her eyes. As if that wasn't enough horror, Trilla went on to explain the endless torture she underwent with the devestating realization that Cere was actually nearby, having been the one to surrender her Padawan's location. And that was what drove the girl to madness, to become what she was today.
Hearing the conclusion to Trilla's story made Luminara's stomach knot up. The image of Cere seeing Trilla as an Inquisitor was enough to make her blood run cold. Having experienced months of Imperial torture, Luminara could understand how Cere could have unintentionally cracked, but she also could see Trilla's point of view. Cere and Trilla's fate was just another tragedy caused by the Empire.
Luminara then hugs herself as she recalls the numerous amount of times, the Grand Inquisitor had tried to get Barriss's whereabouts from her. The Puan would speak of Barriss being recruited and being the one to kill her. Had the Empire been successful, Luminara would have been in the exact position Cere was when Trilla revealed her new identity to her. In all honesty, Luminara would have differed from Cere and not run away from her Padawan. For those who give into the dark side from the side of a Jedi are in immense pain and Luminara would never, ever, let Barriss suffer alone. The Jedi Master would gladly fall with Barriss if it meant freeing her soul.
Shivering, Luminara thinks to herself, "If Barriss were to come to me like that, I wouldn't fight her. I'd still tell her I love her even after her blade impales me."
Trilla avoids eye contact after finishing her story bringing Luminara back to the present.
"Trilla, I'm so,so sorry you had to go through that, alone. It is unforgivable. I can't speak for Cere, but you and I both know all too well how brutal the Empire is when it comes to their victims. Just look at me, I'm all but skin and bone, and I feel that my time is running out. So I think it's fair to say that Cere must have been in a great deal of pain to have given you up. No one reacts to pain the same way and neither of us witnessed what they did to your Master. I'm in no way saying that what has happened to you is fair or just. I just say this in the hope that maybe that gives you some comfort in knowing that Cere would not have hurt you intentionally. I know with Barriss, I would not.
Even though I've gotten to see Barriss again, I still feel that I have failed her Trilla. I knew my Padawan was hurting before the bombing took place. I thought Barriss was better off in the Temple, away from battle, while I got deployed, but I was terribly wrong. I should have fought harder to stay by her side and for that I paid the price. Trilla, no Master ever has ill intent with their Padawan. To us, you are our children, and we want nothing but the best for you. But Jedi are not free from mistakes and unfortunately the Emperor had made it where everyone was set up to lose. The mistakes made then carried heavier consequences.
You ask me how I could love and forgive Barriss and the answer is simple. My love for Barriss is unconditional. I've loved her since the moment I held her in my arms as an infant and I've raised her into the young woman she had become. As shocked and hurt as I was by what had happened, all I could see in that holo was that baby that took my finger, the toddler that once held my hand, the little girl that I played in the snow with, the Padawan I held in my arms for many years. Barriss is not evil, just like you are not evil and it's the hope that I could set things right is what kept me breathing.
You don't have to believe it now or ever, but I have no doubt Cere loves you and that she does think of you. Trauma is just unpredictable Trilla. She may not have reacted as you may have liked, but that doesn't mean she doesn't love you, that she wasn't horrified to see what they've done to you, or that she wasn't disgusted with herself. Cere made the choice to run from the Empire Trilla and leave it all behind, but so can you. You know this from your training. You always have a choice."
Trilla shakes her head as if Luminara had been screaming at her.
"STOP IT! ENOUGH!"
The durasteel all around them began to creak under Trilla's anger, but Luminara didn't flinch. For she knew the dark side did not answer to reason and that the fallen Padawan was just another victim of it. Luminara knew her words rang with truth and if that was the last bit of advice she gave to any one, she accepted it.
With a thunderous stomp, Trilla turns to leave the cell, placing her helmet back on her head to hide the tears streaming down her face.
"He's on his way to kill you, you know! You're about to die and yet instead of begging for mercy or accepting Lord Vader's offer, you just couldn't let go of your foolish Jedi beliefs or your love for Barriss ..."
Trilla clenches her fist.
"Who still doesn't deserve it."
Luminara bows her head, accepting what she always knew was coming. But she was not angry. All she felt was sympathy for Trilla, sincerely hoping that one day the young woman could find her way back to the light again like her Barriss did.
"I still stand by what I've said Trilla. I know it may not be what you wanted to hear, but I'd be doing you a disservice by lying to you. If this is indeed the last time I see you, I hope from the bottom of my heart that you find peace again and that you and Cere do meet again, even if I am wrong. You deserve closure and you deserve to know that you are loved."
Luminara couldn't see the devastation on Trilla's face through the helmet, but the Mirialan could sense that the Inquisitor accepted her words before the dark side regained its hold on her.
Luminara gives Trilla a smile, no different than the one she'd give Barriss.
"Farewell Trilla and may the Force be with you."
The Inquisitor leaves the cell without another word.
Walking hand in hand, Ahsoka and Barriss walk alongside Bail through the Rebel base on Dantooine. Riyo was waiting for them in the main conference room looking calm and collected despite having been in Imperial custody. Without a moment's hesitation, the three of them meet the Senator, all of them on guard in case they were walking into another trap. Both Ahsoka and Barriss stretched out into the Force to see if there was anything in Riyo's thoughts that would indicate something was up.
Despite the hardened expressions on everyone's face, Riyo immediately springs up from her chair and greets Ahsoka and Bail.
"Ahsoka! Bail! You're alright!"
Bail was the first to speak.
"As are you, Senator! Don't get me wrong, we're relieved to see that you are free and unharmed, but it is surprising to see that you were able to flee from the Empire so quickly. We were just about to get a rescue team assembled when I got word of your arrival!"
"Yes…" Riyo says, looking down to her hands. "I got lucky, I had some unexpected help."
"What do you mean?" Ahsoka asks, the question coming across harder than intended.
Taken aback by Ahsoka's tone, Riyo quickly answers, "I've been sworn to secrecy, I can't tell you."
As much as Ahsoka cared for her friend, she did not have the patience for any riddles. She lets go of Barriss's hand to go walk over to Riyo. From behind, Barriss sends soothing waves of the Force in an attempt to ease Ahsoka's tension.
"Riyo, I'm sorry for how this may sound, but I don't have the strength for vague answers. You must know how suspicious your safe return is from our perspective. The last time I saw you, you were being taken by an Inquisitor and a squadron of troopers, opponents that I or Barriss…" Ahsoka says pointing to the Mirialan, "would have difficulty against. I'm grateful to know that someone came to your aid, but you're going to have to do better than that. We all think you may have been followed or maybe we're being tricked and after the days we've had, I can't handle another betrayal. So please tell us, who helped you?"
Riyo bows her head, taking a deep breath before reassuring, "They were Jedi Ahsoka, but I was instructed not to tell you who they were. I was told it was imperative that their identities remained anonymous. They were actually there to rescue Master Unduli but found me along the way."
Barriss's heart stops at the mention of her Master and instantly locks eyes with Ahsoka, whose expression mirrored her own. A thousand questions swam in both of their minds, yet they waited for Riyo to finish.
"They snuck me to an escape pod and stayed behind to ensure I wouldn't be followed or anything. So trust me when I say that I'm not misleading you. I just owe it to these Jedi to not blow their cover in exchange for my life."
As much as Barriss wanted to know who the Jedi were coming to Luminara's aid, a much bigger question burned her tongue.
"Do you know where you were going?! Where my Master was being held?!" Barriss blurts, her anxiety getting the best of her.
"I'm sorry...but I do not. All I knew was that I was being transported to the same prison she was being detained in." Riyo says remorsefully, her eyes beginning to well with seeing the Mirialan slump into a nearby chair. Ahsoka rushes back to Barriss's side and embraces her, rubbing circles onto the Mirialan's back to calm her.
Wanting to give the couple a moment to breathe, Bail jumps in.
"Riyo, I'm sorry to keep pestering for answers, but you did not happen to catch a planet or a system? Anything that would give us a location?"
Riyo silently shakes her head, a single tear rolling down her cheek. Bail goes to her side and offers her a tissue.
"It's alright Riyo. You've done the best you could under the circumstances and I'm hoping the Jedi that helped you escape will be able to help Master Unduli before our intel can. All that matters now is that you're safe and here with us. Let's get you comfortable and we'll talk later, okay?"
Riyo graciously accepts Bail's hand and lets him lead her out of the room. Just as they approach the door, Riyo turns to face Ahsoka and Barriss.
"I know I've said that I can't give away their identities, but if it's any comfort, I want you to know that the two Jedi that saved me care a great deal about Master Unduli. They seemed to have a close relationship with her."
This catches both of the women's attention. Once more they shared a glance at one another as their minds searched for potential candidates. Ahsoka may not be as familiar with Luminara's relationships outside of Barriss, but she knew Obi-wan was close with her. Though Ahsoka has tried plenty of times to sense Obi-wan's presence in the Force and has felt nothing.
Barriss, on the other hand, instantly thought of Obi-wan and Quinlan. She knew Quinlan for a fact was alive and aware of the danger Luminara was in, but Obi-wan seemed to be a stretch. Obi-wan would undoubtedly have the drive to save Luminara, but as far as Barriss, there was no confirmation of his survival. Even if it was Obi-wan, how did he and Quinlan meet? It all just seemed too incredible.
Ahsoka finally speaks up.
"Thank you Riyo, really. That is reassuring." she says warmly, rising to give the Pantoran a hug.
Riyo relaxes, "You're welcome Ahsoka. Thank you again for your bravery back on Pantora. I'm sincerely happy and relieved to see that you're alright and that you're reunited with Barriss."
But neither Ahsoka or Barriss could react to Riyo's sentiment as both of them simultaneously froze. Bail and Riyo stiffened as they were alarmed by the look of terror on the Jedi's faces. It was extremely clear that something awful was happening.
Ahsoka lets go of Riyo as Barriss runs to her. In half a second, Ahsoka swept Barriss up and embraced her. It took everything in the Togruta not to scream as she could hear and see the same thing Barriss was witnessing.
"Ahsoka?! Barriss?! What's happening?!" Bail shouts frantically.
But neither woman answered, causing both Senators in the room to join their side. Tears began to pour from Ahsoka and Barriss' eyes and their breathing began to grow erratic. It was by far the most heartbreaking sight Riyo and Bail had ever seen and neither one of them were prepared for the blood curdling screams they would hear just seconds later.
"LUMINARA!"
The Grand Inquisitor arrives at the Spire with two Stormtroopers behind him carrying the same box they had contained the Mirialan in before. He sees Trilla approach making the Puan's lips curl into a malicious grin.
"Ah, Second Sister. Would you be so kind as to show these men where to put this tomb? I must speak with the Emperor."
Trilla says nothing but nods, motioning for the troopers to follow her. Once they were out of sight, the Grand Inquisitor took out the holoprojector from his pocket and turned it on to see Darth Sidious's image.
"I take it you have arrived at Lord Vader's feeble hiding place for Unduli?"
"Yes, my Lord." replies the Grand Inquisitor. "We are ready whenever you are."
"Good." the Sith Lord says before asking his next question. "And what has become of Kenobi and Vos?"
"They are on a transport en route to your location as requested. I'll be sure to transmit the recording of their dearest friend's last moments to them as soon as possible." sneered the Inquisitor. This has been the day the head of the Inquisitorius has been waiting for and he could not contain his excitement.
"You have done well, Grand Inquisitor. Should you be successful in collecting Barriss Offee after you're done there, you shall be handsomely rewarded."
The Grand Inquisitor laughs,"That should be no trouble considering we're about to break many hearts! You have my word. I will return to Coruscant with the girl."
Darth Sidious raises a hand, "Just one more thing."
"Yes?"
"Should you come across Ahsoka Tano...execute her. My apprentice needs to be reminded that all attachments must be destroyed."
"It will be done."
The Emperor's teeth then gleamed in the holo.
"The time has now come, Grand Inquisitor...execute Order 66."