The show must go on!
Go on. . . go on. . . go on. . . go on. . .go on. . .go on. . .
Keldeo the Critic- Season Six
Episode 12: Unredeemable by ShardSol
"So Belladonna and Crystal make a home in an abandoned studio, honestly a pretty nice set-up for a couple of stray dogs and exactly the kind of detail rich setting you'd expect to see in a Don Bluth film-," Keldeo went on.
"RUN ON SENTENCE!" Munna shouted as she popped up.
Keldeo scowled and said, "Most of this fanfic already takes place in Hell. We do not to be tortured by Grammar Nazis on top of that!"
Munna flew off, and Keldeo said, "Anyway, Belladonna reveals how no matter what she does she'll be sent back to Hell when she dies, but Crystal refuses to give up hope."
"I'm scared Crystal. I don't know what I'm going to do. I'm doomed either way you look at it."
"Don't say that! I'm sure there is a way. There has to be!"
"I already told you, I'm blacklisted. There is nothing you can do."
Crystal huffed. "I don't care. We are friends, and I'm going to do everything I can to help you."
Belladonna froze. A look of surprise and confusion made its way onto her face. "F-Friends?"
"Yes, friends. And friends look out for one another. You saved my life, twice, and you helped me find a place to live."
"But even still, I used you. I treated you like crap, but despite all of that.. you.. You can't be my friend. I'm a terrible person. I don't even deserve any friends."
Crystal smiled, placing her paw on your shoulder. "You are not a terrible person. You may have done a lot of bad things in the past, but whether you realize it or not, you've shown a great deal of remorse and a willingness to change. We all deserve a second chance Bella. I've seen the good in you, and I feel you are worthy of my friendship."
Belladonna couldn't help but shed a tear from Crystals seemingly endless kindness. She was resisting the urge to flat out burst into tears, but managed to keep it bottled up.
"I-I don't even know what to say." Belladonna's voice shook.
"You don't have to say anything." Crystal reassured.
Crystal then proceeded to wrap her arms around the whipped in an embrace. Belladonna, shocked by the sudden gesture, began to shed even more tears. She couldn't take this anymore. She hugged Crystal tightly, crying into her shoulder. Crystal brushed her head with her other paw as she sobbed, trying to comfort her as much as she could. Belladonna couldn't tell if she was happy, relieved, upset, or all of the above.
Belladonna and Crystal's relationship leveled up to 24: Affectionate
Keldeo shrugged and said, "This honestly says a lot more about Crystal than Belladonna. Like, we still aren't exactly sure what Belladonna did or what he life was before she became a demon, which makes it both easy to sympathize with her, yet hard to justify that sympathy, if that makes any sense."
"Meanwhile, back in Heaven, Annabelle is angry at Sakura for bringing Belladonna back to life."
"You did what?!" Annabelle screamed.
Sakura sat with her head high. "I saw it as necessary. She really seemed interested in.."
"Nononononono, No! She can't be back on Earth! She'll cause nothing but chaos and destruction! How can you be so stupid?!"
"Hey, look! I promised that she'd be tormented even worse if she didn't make up for her past. Either way, she's still going back to Hell, so you don't have to worry about her."
Annabelle's face contorted from Sakura's negligence. This was beneath her on so many levels. She had to get her to understand the big mistake she had just made.
"What about her powers?" Annabelle retorted. "She could set the whole city ablaze if she wanted to."
"She no longer has any demonic powers. Red had stripped them away from her."
"C'mon, Annabelle! Sakura isn't stupid!" Keldeo said obviously.
Annabelle barred her teeth in frustration. "Oh sure, we can let out all the bad people in Hell into Earth and 'wait and see'. I'm sure that would turn out nicely. My cousin is pure evil. She is guaranteed to do something horrible. You have made a terrible mistake Sakura. You have a lot to think about."
"Okay, first off, that's not what Sakura did here. Second, who are you to tell Sakura off? She's the archangel here! She totally outranks you, Anna-."
Munna suddenly interrupted Keldeo's rant by levitating a smartphone in front of his face.
"Read that," Munna said simply.
Keldeo read the web page, and he blinked and said, "Huh. . . So Annabelle is an archangel too? But when Sakura first appeared the author made it look like Sakura was super important and stuff!"
As Munna took her phone back and flew off, Keldeo shrugged and said, "Ugh. Whatever. So, it looks like all those video game jokes I've been making were more appropriate than I thought, because the author literally describes our heroines' daily routine as a series of fetch quests."
Crystal looked over in an alleyway to find a few dogs looking for scraps. She ushered Belladonna over and got her to give some of her food supply to them. They did these kinds of fetch quests for almost the entire day. They both felt very good afterwards. Belladonna was overwhelmed by all of the thanks and praises she received. She actually didn't feel so rotten anymore. Unfortunately, this was only a small drop in the puddle of good she had to cook up before it was too late.
All of the sudden, Crystal came across a box full of puppies for adoption. The puppies inside were barking playfully, waiting for somebody to adopt them.
"Aww, look Bella, aren't they cute?" Crystal pointed to the box of puppies. Belladonna froze in place. A frown was slapped onto her face as she eyed the box. For a moment, she began to feel angry, almost livid. She bolted and ran for the nearest alleyway, leaving Crystal behind.
Keldeo looked invested again as he said, "Finally! We're finally gonna flesh out Belladonna's character and backstory!"
"When I was a puppy, I was also held up for adoption, along with my cousin Annabelle."
Crystal stood silently, her ears perked up.
Belladonna continued. "We waited there for weeks. If we didn't get an owner soon, we would be sent to the pound once we grew to old to have any appeal. Eventually, Annabelle got adopted by some rich yuppie. I felt sad seeing her go, as she was the only family I had. Sadly, I was never adopted. I didn't want to be sent to the pound, so I escaped."
Belladonna let out a sigh, the anger returning to her face. "And so I was left all alone to fend for myself, while my cousin was spoiled rotten by that fat, snobby rich lady. I never had anyone to care for me, or love me.. the idea of love almost sounded alien to me. That's when I realized, that the world itself never cared about me. Nobody cared about me. They only wanted to take advantage of me."
Crystal made a look of surprise, then frowned. All the pieces were coming together. Perhaps this was the reason Belladonna had become evil in the first place.
"Anyone who ever wanted to help me, only did so if I did something in return. Some people did seem to genuinely care about me, but I could see through their facade. They always wanted something from me. Perhaps I was wrong. Maybe some people did want to care for me, but I was too blind and hopeless to see it."
Belladonna shed a tear, clenching her teeth in disgust at her past. Crystal walked over, wiping the tear from her cheek with the side of her paw. The kind gesture helped relieve her tension, but she continued.
"I always hated my cousin for that. She got everything, and I was left with nothing but scraps and hopeless dreams. The worst thing of all is that I never got to know where she lived. If I did, I would have done something really stupid. At least I can rest easy knowing I never killed my own cousin." Belladonna dipped her head.
"You would never do something like that." Crystal consoled.
"You don't know what I was like." Belladonna frowned. "I just wish I had still loved my cousin as much as I do now. I was too weak. I should have looked for her, and I should have forgiven her."
"But how'd you end up in Hell?" Keldeo asked, "Not to downplay your tragic backstory, but all dogs automatically go to Heaven in this universe, unless they sell their soul. How and when did you sell your soul? How long ago was this? What exactly did you do during that time under Red's employ? We NEED to know this in order commit to any feelings about you!"
Belladonna began to sob, letting streams of tears drip from her face. Crystal hugged the sobbing whippet, trying to comfort her as much as she could. Although it was dangerous to be out at dusk in an alleyway, Crystal still felt a part of her telling her that this was more important. What they didn't realize, was that someone else was watching them from above the clouds. The pink whippet couldn't believe what she was hearing
Belladonna and Crystal's relationship leveled up to 24: Affectionate
Belladonna and Annabelle's relationship leveled up to 4: Maybe sort of likes
"Wait a minute, did Annabelle not know about this?" Keldeo said in bewilderment, "Didn't she literally say in the 'Welcome to being dead' scene in the first movie that the angels in Heaven know everything? Shouldn't Belladonna's life be recorded in a book somewhere? Or are we just supposed to give Annabelle the benefit of the doubt and assume she never checked and assumed that she assumed that Belladonna got adopted later and went bad for no reason. I mean, sure, Annabelle has proven herself to be kinda stupid in the movies and TV series- oh yeah. . ."
"So the next day, our heroines' skip the side quests and move on to the next part of the main quest, which involves finding a mother poodle's child. However, during the search, Annabelle freezes time so she can speak privately with Crystal."
"I don't think you understand just how many 'chances' I had given that.. thing. Sure, she may 'act' remorseful and innocent, but deep down, she is nothing but pure evil. She deserves eternal torment."
"How do you know? After all the good she had done recently, how can you say that she's pure evil?"
"She's only doing that to avoid Red's punishment. This was all a mistake made by one of the other archangels. Belladonna shouldn't even be here!"
"But what if you are wrong? What if she really has changed?"
"Guess what, it doesn't matter if she changes or not. She had her chance in life to be a good person, and even in Hell she was given a chance. I've run out of chances to give. Even if she really has changed, which I strongly doubt, she would still make a good example for those who do not wish to burn in Hell. She can be proud of that at least."
"Okay, since we've seen Belladonna's thoughts, we know Annabelle's wrong here," Keldeo explained tentatively, "But still, Belladonna had to have sold her soul to get sent to Hell in the first place, and if Annabelle did give her all these chances before putting her on the blacklist, can we really call Annabelle the bad guy here?"
Keldeo huffed and said, "I'm sorry, but this plot just isn't doing it for me. If only it would give me something interesting to go off of-."
"Oh. I get it now." Crystal made a smug look.
"What.. what are you on about?"
"You regret putting her on that black list.. don't you?"
"W-What are you talking about? I would never wish any goodwill for that disgusting, waste of.."
"You cannot accept that she is a better person now, because that would make you the bad guy for putting her on that list."
Annabelle's eye began to twitch. She made what appeared to be a manic grin. She began to laugh loudly, almost crazily. It was unnerving to say the least, seeing this pink, angelic whippet turn into a crazed hate-filled lunatic. Crystal backed away a bit, cringing from the strange sight.
PING!
Keldeo sat up straight and said with wide eyes, "Oh my gosh. . . that's it! That's genius! This story isn't just about Belladonna' character development, it's about Annabelle's character development too! It's about her grappling with the fact that she did something evil! That's genius!"
Keldeo stood smiling for a moment, then sighed and said, "Okay, okay, I'll do it."
Keldeo then slapped an image of a Black Psyche Lock onto the image of Annabelle laughing and said, "This fanfic is just a magnet for video game references, isn't it?"
Annabelle stopped laughing, took a deep breath, and looked down at Crystal with a patronizing smile. "Okay, look. You want to see if there is any good in her? Give her this."
Crystal saw a bright light appear in front of her. In it's place was a bright golden dog tag. The dog tag flew into Crystal's paws. She grasped it, looking down at it's intricate patterns and bright luster.
Gift of Divine Power!
Crystal got a Miracle Dog Tag!
Miracle Dog Tag
Will perform a miracle for the pure of heart.
"This review was NOT sponsored by Miitopia or Nintendo, by the way," Keldeo remarked.
"W-What is it?" Crystal asked.
"It's a miracle dog tag. It will perform one miracle for the holder, but only if they are pure of heart." Annabelle spoke softly. "You can have her use it during her 'missions' here on earth. I can guarantee you that no matter how much she tries to be a good person and repent for her misdeeds, it will never work for her as long as she lives."
Crystal looked back up at Annabelle with a frown on her face. "Alright. Then I guess this will settle it then. If the dog tag works, she's clean of her sins.
Keldeo frowned and said, "Well, this is a joke. It'll never work because Belladonna already sold her soul. . . didn't she? Ugh! But Crystal went to Hell too and she was just a thief! Do all dogs go to Heaven or don't they! ANSWER ME!"
After a lengthy explanation, Belladonna was both overjoyed and a bit depressed. She was happy that her cousin finally acknowledged her existence, but not quite pleased by her lack of forgiveness and unwillingness to talk to her. She found a dog collar in one of the trash bins, and used it to equip the miracle dog tag. She wasn't sure if it would ever work, but just having something from her only cousin would give her the resolve to keep fighting.
"So, believe or not, we're already at the climax," Keldeo said, "For, it turns out, our heroines discover a puppy trafficking ring run by. . . bulldogs."
The room appeared to have some strange coagulation of junk and metal for the walls. It looked like an underground bunker of sorts. She could see about 20 bulldogs sitting around in a circle, some of them lying on cushions or sitting on stools. They looked like the same bulldogs that attacked Crystal before. They all laughed and conversed with one another. But what really caught Belladonna's eye, were the black metal cages at the end of the room behind the bulldogs. She couldn't see inside of them as it was too dark. The only light was coming from a lantern held by one of the bulldogs. She listened carefully as they spoke.
"We are totally gonna make a mint this time boss!" One of the underlings cheered.
"Yeah yeah, for sure. It's just a matter of time until the trader gets here." The boss replied.
"What's taking them so long?" One of them pouted.
"Patience my friend. They'll get here soon enough." The boss reassured. He then walked over to the metal cages, and held his lantern up to them. "And all these little pups will make us a fortune! Hehehe!"
". . . A FORUNE IN WHAT!?" Keldeo exclaimed, "You're dogs! What are you being paid in? Steaks? Kibble? Bones? And who's even paying you? Who are you selling this puppies to, Cruella DeVil?"
An image of the live action Cruella Devil from Cruella (2021) appeared.
"No! Not that one!" Keldeo said quickly, then he sighed and said, "It's like the evil gang of underwater sharks that shank the Titanic in that horrible animated Titanic movie."
Rapping Dog: "IT'S PARTY TIME! PARTY TIME!"
"NO! NOT THAT ONE!" Keldeo shouted again, then he sighed again and said, "Okay, like I said: climax time. The bulldogs end up hearing our heroines, so we get a chase scene where Belladonna and Crystal are forced to split up. Belladonna is able to double back and free the puppies, but Crystal ends up getting cornered in the sewer."
Crystal stopped running and began to skid towards the wall, just stopping two inches away from it. She looked back to see the bulldogs inching closer to her. Their teeth were barred and they all grinned mercilessly.
"Well well well, it seems like you will be paying us that tooth fine after all," The bulldog leader smirked.
"Y-You? No, this can't be happening!" Crystal stammered.
"Oh but it is dear. Don't worry, I'll make sure to take em' out nice and slow."
All the other bulldogs began to laugh as the leader inched even closer to her.
"S-Stay away from me! Please.. don't!" Crystal begged.
Just then, she looked around the room to find anything she could attack them with. Unfortunately, she couldn't find anything. Not even a rock or a piece of trash. There were a few crates next to her, but they were clearly too heavy to work with. Just then she saw a chain hanging from the ceiling with a large metal ring suspended at the bottom. It hung just a few feet from her. She couldn't use that as a weapon either, as it was chained to the ceiling, but.. wait...she thought for a moment. Why would there be a chain attached to the ceiling? Then she realized what the chain was for.
"Any last words hon?" The bulldog leader teased.
"Well, I'm not really all that good with water puns but.." Crystal gave a small smirk, "I guess now you should all consider yourselves 'dam'ned!"
Crystal jumped up and grabbed the chain with her maw. As soon as she did, the large metal wall behind her opened up and water began rushing out. Crystal held on tight as she was pummeled by the water rushing out. She however did not let go and resisted being swept away. All the bulldogs were carried away by the rushing water. They sputtered and howled as they got sent down through the drains. After a few moments, the water began to subside, and Crystal let go of the chain to continue her venture.
Keldeo smiled and said, "I gotta say, Crystal's whole thing in this story appears to be hope and intelligence. I like it when characters have a running theme to them. So, Crystal, Belladonna, and the puppies all reunite, but it turns out one got separated from the group, and Belladonna rushes off to find him."
She jumped through the hole and found herself falling quite a few feet downwards. She hit the ground with a thud. The thud echoed through the large cylindrical hallway that seemed to stretch for miles in two directions. They crying suddenly stopped, and she got up slowly to take a look around her. Right behind her, she saw a small male poodle pup staring right back at her, with tears pouring down its face.
"G-Geoffrey?" Belladonna asked the poodle.
"Y-Yeah? H-How did you know my na-" Before the poodle could finish his sentence, he was swept up by Belladonna in a strong embrace.
"Oh Geoffrey, I finally found you!"
"W-What? W-Who are you?"
"Your mother is worried sick! She sent me out to rescue you. I'm going to take you home right away!"
"Y-Y-*sniff*-You came to rescue me?"
"That's right. You won't have anything to worry abou.."
Just then, Belladonna looked around her again. She began to hear a noise as her ears twitched. It sounded like a low rumbling noise. It was progressively getting louder. She looked around to figure out where the noise was coming from, but couldn't find anything. She then looked down at her feet, and saw two metal rails right next to them. Her heart sank into her chest. She was in a subway tunnel. She looked up towards one of the tunnels and saw a very dim light in the distance. It got progressively brighter along with the noise. It was a subway, and it was headed straight for them.
Keldeo shuddered in fear and said, "Ugh. I wonder what would be easier: getting run over or touching the third rail."
Keldeo shook off his fear and said, "So, Belladonna grabs the pup and tries to run away, but they're too far away from any exits and she winds up tripping on the tracks, forcing her to try and use the Miracle Dog Tag."
She sat up on her hind legs, Geoffrey still hugging her side, and grasped the miracle dog tag in her paws.
"Please.. please don't let us die. Please.. let us escape! Let us live!" Belladonna pleaded.
Nothing happened. Tears began to roll down Belladonna's cheeks as she begged for the miracle dog tag to work.
"Please! If you wont work for me, at least work for Geoffrey. I know I don't deserve to live, but he does. Just please.. save him! I know I'm not pure of heart. I have my flaws, and I know I have a long way to go before I make up for everything but.. please... just this once.."
Photoshop Flowey: "But nobody came. Boy what a shame."
"Yeah, yeah, but then we get this delightful image!" Keldeo declared.
Belladonna stared with a look of shock on her face as she could have sworn she saw the face of Red at the head of the subway, looking at her and grinning, letting out a low cackle. Belladonna's heart dropped into her stomach. She froze from the sudden visage of evil staring back at her. She then closed her eyes, holding the miracle dog tag close to her bosom. She prayed as hard as she could, all the way to the end. The noise of the subway, and Red's cackling, was louder than ever, and increasing in volume at such a rapid rate, that she could have sworn the subway was just a few feet in front of her.
From the shock, she dropped the miracle dog tag. It fell on the floor with a *clink*. Afterwards, everything went silent.
Keldeo sat up on his haunches and clapped his forehooves in applause. "THAT. . .was EXACTLY the kind of imagery Don Bluth would put in his films! That's his style EXACTLY! Congratulations to you, ShardSol!"
Keldeo stopped applauding and said, "Well, Belladonna dies and is greeted by Sakura, who has some good news and bad news. The good news is that Geoffrey grabbed the Miracle Dog Tag at the last moment and used it to escape and get back to his mom. The bad news is that since Belladonna didn't do enough good deeds, she's gonna be handed over to Red."
"Well, alright then. I accept my punishment."
Sakura looked at Belladonna with a bit of confusion. She wasn't expecting Belladonna not to resist, despite not being rewarded for her efforts and good deeds on earth.
"Really? You sure you don't have any regrets from your mission?"
"Nope, not one. I may have failed, but I at least left the world a little less worse off then I had left it before. I'm just happy those puppies are safe."
"Yes, that was a very valiant effort, and it would have given you a straight path to heaven, had you not irreparably ruined your chances in your previous life."
"I just have one more question."
"Yes?"
"Do you.. think I'm a good person?" Belladonna asked, looking up at her with a penitent expression.
Sakura paused for a moment.. This was already starting to become unbearable. She had seen Belladonna risk her life for her friends, and prove to them time and time again that she has changed. She couldn't bring herself to do something so unfair and unjust. She may not have made up for her past, but she was still capable of so much good, and at least deserved some sort of compensation for her good deeds. She dipped her head in shame.
"Huh," Keldeo mused, "You know, it seems like Belladonna and Charlie have something in common now. They already lost their Get Out of Hell Free Because You're a Dog cards, so the kind of salvation they need is a little more. . .human? You get what I'm trying to say here?"
"Yes, you are a good person Belladonna, but it is too late. I'm sorry. There is nothing more that can be done. I would send you back to earth again, but that would only anger.. your cousin.."
"I see.. I understand. T-Thank you for at least giving me a chance to prove myself.. even if it didn't last as long as I had hoped."
"You are welcome. Now, it is time."
"Well, after this, Sakura finally decides to confront Annabelle and make her accept the truth."
"Well, I hope you are happy." Sakura murmured as she looked to the side.
"Yes, quite so. I guess this means you have redeemed yourself, Sakura." Annabelle smiled.
"Why though.."
"Why what?"
"Why.. why did you have to create that... that stupid blacklist?"
"Why else? To prevent any, oh, I don't know.. misguided angels from sending unredeemable evil doers to heaven of course!"
Keldeo stared blankly for a moment, then he shouted, "WHAAAAAA!? SHE created the blacklist!? How did she manage to do that? I mean, sure, she's an archangel, but she's just one archangel. And as far as I'm concerned she's a low ranking one from what we've seen of her. How could she possibly have the authority to create something that powerful. I thought the blacklist was some sacred artifact that a higher angel like Gabriel gave to her, like the Horn of Gabriel from the second movie. Why does Annabelle get to judge and permanently condemn whoever she likes? BAD DOG!"
Keldeo took a deep breath and let it out, then he said, "Well, aside from that, I just have to admire how calm Sakura is in this scene. It might just be the calmest Reason You Suck Speech I've ever seen."
"I see.. and what makes you think your cousin is beyond redemption?"
"No, we are not going to talk about that again! She's evil! Plain and simple!"
Phoenix Wright: OBJECTION!
(MUSIC PLAYS: Phoenix Wright Ace Attorney OST - Pressing Pursuit ~ Cornered)
"After she risked her life to save all those starving dogs.. and all those puppies... can't you at least admit that she has changed? Even a little?"
"I'd sooner have my wings clipped then admit that she's had even a tinge of remorse from what she has done."
Phoenix Wright: HOLD IT!
"You said admit! So you do know she's changed! You just don't want to accept it!" Keldeo accused.
"Even if she's your family?"
"Er.. She's not my family."
"She's your cousin."
"She's.. she's... just shut up! I don't care about her anymore! She's dead to me!"
"Well you aren't dead to her. She really cares about you Annabelle. I could see it in her. She loves you from the bottom of her heart."
Annabelle looked off into the distance, with a look of worry and confusion on her face.
Sakura then walked up beside the confused whippet. "Remember back when you used to live together? You used to love her Annabelle. You always looked out for her and she did the same for you. Even though you both struggled to survive before being taken up for adoption, it was your love and compassion that kept you both going."
"S-She's not a puppy anymore.."
"And she isn't that evil wicked she-demon anymore. All she wanted to do was apologize to you Annabelle. That was all she wanted. You couldn't even give her that."
"Well what do you want me to do?! She's already on the blacklist. She cannot be saved. Fine, I admit it. I screwed up! I doomed my own cousin!" Annabelle shouted.
Annabelle's Black Psyche Lock shattered as the music abruptly stopped.
Sakura backed away as Annabelle began to lose it.
"T-This was all my fault. I should have had faith in her. I should have held on to my love for her, because now she's in trouble, and I can no longer help her. I wasn't loyal enough. I wasn't any better than she was!" Annabelle began to tear up. Tears began to run down her cheeks. "I don't deserve to be up here in the clouds, while my cousin suffers all because of me! I'm a monster!"
"Well to be fair, you aren't Christ. Giving endless mercy isn't supposed to be your job," Keldeo said sympathetically, then he frowned and said, "Which is why you had no business creating a blacklist!"
"Sakura.. bring me the blacklist." Annabelle ordered.
"S-Sure thing.. mind if I ask why.." Sakura was cut off.
"Just do it!" Annabelle shouted.
A black list materialized out of thin air in front of Sakura, she handed it over to Annabelle. Annabelle then took a quill pen, and began to write on it.
"Um.. Annabelle.. what are you doing?" Sakura asked, worriedly.
"What I should have done ages ago."
"FINALLY!" Keldeo said in impatient relief, "So, Annabelle crosses Belladonna's name off the blacklist and-."
Just then, a fiery red light appeared underneath Annabelle. A ring of flames engulfed the pink whippet, and her wings suddenly vanished and were replaced by bat wings. When Sakura saw this, she looked over at the blacklist to see that Annabelle had signed her name on it. Sakura looked back at Annabelle with a look of horror.
"What?! What have you done?! Annabelle! You just doomed yourself! You can never come back! Why?! Are you messed in the head?!" Sakura yelled.
"If she can't come back here, then neither should I."
And with that, Annabelle was gone.
M. Night Shyamalan: "What a twist!"
"But WHY!?" Keldeo exclaimed, "Why couldn't she just take Belladonna's name off? Can't she cross it out and initial and date it? Couldn't she cut the name out with a magical pair of holy scissors? What about white-out? Or. . . black-out because the paper is black. Ugh, if Annabelle created the blacklist, why can't she change its rules? I don't get this. I just said this a few seconds ago, you are NOT Christ, Annabelle. This is NOT your job!"
Coballion suddenly walked in an said, "Actually, this makes a lot of sense."
"How?" Keldeo asked.
Coballion explained, "Well, you see, in spite of admitting her mistake, Annabelle still has a very black and white view of the world. If someone does something bad, they should simply be punished in her eyes. So much so that the idea of freeing her cousin is simply impossible to her. Belladonna cannot possibly be saved, so the only option she has is to punish herself for being just as horrible as Belladonna was. So yes, it makes perfect sense for Annabelle to do this."
Keldeo blinked as Coballion nodded and walked away. Then Keldeo shrugged and said, "Well, okay. So, back in Hell, we see Belladonna is an entirely different person than she was in the beginning. Instead of being arrogant and confrontational, she's more humble and calm and accepting. In spite of everything, this story has great character development."
"Hahahaha-heheheh! Well! What do we have here? It looks like you came back after all! How did you enjoy your little trip? Did you miss me?" Red asked in a patronizing tone.
Belladonna just sat there in silence, not uttering a word.
"Aww, are you still butthurt that you didn't get into heaven after your little suicide mission? That's too bad. It's much more fun down here you know! Well.. for me that is."
Belladonna still sat there. She just eyed Red with an unimpressed look on her face.
"Oh come on! You could at least admit that life was so much better, when you were on my side. I guess you are a bit bummed out that you got captured. It was only a matter of time before I captured you again."
"Are you going to torture me or not?" Belladonna murmured.
Red was caught off guard, but then regained his composure. "Well well, straight to the point. I like that. Guards!"
A bunch of demons came out from behind the walls and proceeded to try and drag Belladonna to the meeting room. Funny enough, Belladonna ended up being the one dragging them, as she walked casually over through the hallway. She could still see dogs chained to the walls, being burned incessantly by the flames below. For once, the sight did make her stomach turn. If she could, she would try to rescue them, but it was a fools errand at this point, since the wraiths behind her could kill her at any moment.
Just as Belladonna made her way into the room, the outline in the wall behind her to the left began to glow again. The door opened up, and as soon as it did, all the memories of the horrendous torture she received had rushed back to her. She was frozen in place. Her calm and indifferent demeanor had broken down. She was already shaking.
"Haha.. not so high and mighty now, aren't we?" Red smirked.
"Not so fast!" A strange feminine voice from behind red bellowed.
Red turned around to see Annabelle standing right behind him, with two wraiths trapped behind her with chains wrapped around them. She spread out her wings, leering at Red. Red made a look of surprise and disbelief.
"W-What? Annabelle? H-How did you get here? A-Am I seeing things?" Red stammered.
Belladonna was also in shock. What was her cousin doing here? All of this, and the fact that she was about to be boiled in lava again, was too much for her to take in. She couldn't speak.
"Nope. Now you are going to free my cousin, or else!" Annabelle demanded.
Belladonna and Annabelle's relationship leveled up to 18: Cares about
Red stared at the pink whippet for a moment, and then burst into laughter. "Bwahahahahahehe! Just who do you think I am? No matter. I like a good challenge. You want her? She's right here."
"N-No Annabelle.. don't do it!" Belladonna's voice shivered as she forced herself to speak. "I-It's a trap!"
Keldeo was grinning with excitement as he said, "Alright! It's time for the final boss! Annabelle and Belladonna vs Red! Oh boy, we needs some music for this! Floyd!"
The Pichu ran in with his guitar and said with a smile, "Anything in particular you'd like?"
"The final boss theme from Hades would be appropriate," Keldeo said.
Pichu began to play the opening notes of the song, but Keldeo interrupted and said, "No, play the theme from it's second stage."
"Awesome!" Pichu said, and he launched right into the epic music.
Annabelle didn't listen. Annabelle flew over Red and landed on all fours next to Belladonna. As soon as she did, a magical spell surrounded them both. Their wings disappeared, and the floor opened beneath them both. They both fell down a long, cobbled tunnel and landed in a spiked cage suspended miles above a huge lava lake. From the view, you could see the rest of Hell stretched miles away. Faint screams could be heard in the distance, and despite being so far up, they could feel the heat radiating from the lava below. After a few moments, they both began to regain their composure.
Sweetie Belle, Floyd, and Keldeo: "OH, COME ON!"
"No fair, we had an awesome demon fight scene in the beginning of the story, why can't we get one epic final battle at the end," Keldeo complained, then he sighed and said, "But we do get a heartwarming scene between Annabelle and Belladonna."
". . .Do you still need me, or-?" Floyd asked.
"Actually, you can play His Theme from Undertale. That would fit," Keldeo said.
Floyd shrugged and began to play the slow tune.
Belladonna shook her head, and looked over at Annabelle with a look of confusion. "A-Annabelle? How did you.. how did you get here? W-Why did you try to…"
"I'm sorry." Annabelle dipped her head in shame.
"What?"
"I'm sorry. I didn't stay faithful to you throughout all these years. I never believed that you could ever change. I was wrong."
"Annabelle.."
Annabelle began to tear up again, turning her head away from Belladonna's gaze. "I've seen
the good in you time and time again, but could never bring myself to admit that I was wrong. I should have believed in you. I should have had at least some hope that you would change. I'm sorry I doubted you cousin!"
Annabelle cried on Belladonna's shoulder. Belladonna held Annabelle with her right paw, still shocked from Annabelle's apology. If anything, she is the one that is supposed to be apologizing.
"Annabelle… I… I don't know what to say…" Belladonna began to tear up as well, and her voice began to crack. "I… I forgive you. I just hope that you can forgive me. I've treated you horribly, and rejected every attempt at redemption you tried to give me in the past. I know you always loved and cared for me, and I wish I had been a better cousin."
Belladonna cried into her cousin's neck, holding her closely and wrapping both paws around her. "I'm sorry, Annabelle. I'm sorry I rejected you. That was the worst decision I had ever made in my life. You were the only family I had. I love you so much, and I am blessed that we at least had a chance to apologize to one another."
"Me too. I want this moment to last forever, even if it means we'll have to spend eternity in Hell. I love you cousin with all my heart, and I will never lose faith in you again."
They hugged each other for what seemed like hours. It was a relief for both cousins to finally be reunited, after all these years of bitter resentment towards one another. Belladonna was finally at peace, and for the first time in her life, she could feel all her guilt and self-loathing begin to wither away.
Belladonna and Annabelle's relationship leveled up to 33: Loyal
"Alright, again, in spite of everything, this story has excellent character development, and this is a very touching scene," Keldeo said with genuine admiration.
Floyd stopped playing and walked off muttering, "I wanted to play a boss theme."
"But after this heartwarming scene, Red begins to lower their cage and dunk them into the lava. Killing them and thus beginning an epic cycle of the two regenerating and dying in Hell as they fight demons just as Belladonna and Crystal had back in the beginning. But perhaps this time their familial bond might be strong enough for them to actually take down the wraiths and even Red himself. Perhaps that is the reason for these twisted events, a method to weaken the forces of evil from the inside so when the End Times finally arrive-."
As the cage began to near the lava lake, both Annabelle and Belladonna cried out for help, desperately pulling at the metal bars. Sakura could only sit and watch in horror as they eventually met their fate. Suddenly, the cage then made contact with the lava. Both dogs jumped onto the metal bars, attempting to get as high up as they could to avoid the lava. They screamed for help as the lava rose higher and higher. All of the sudden, Belladonna's tail had caught fire from the intense head, and she screamed in pain. She gripped the bars as tightly as she could.
Sakura couldn't take any more of this. She made her decision. She grabbed the blacklist with both paws, and began to tear at it from the top. It took all her energy and strength to tear at the blacklist all the way to the bottom, and as soon as she did, the blacklist began to combust into a flurry of ashes and sparks. Sakura fell back, landing on the clouds as she watched the blacklist fizzle out of existence. The black list was destroyed.
Keldeo's jaw dropped, and he shouted, "YOU JUST-! YOU CANT-! I MEAN-! YOU REALLY-! THAT'S ALL YOU HAD TO DO!? Just. . .tear it in half!? Why didn't she-."
Coballion stuck his head into the frame and said knowingly, "Keldeo. . .remember my explanation."
Keldeo sighed, "Okay. I get it. Annabelle's in character."
As the lava began to brush against Annabelle's fur, she could feel the heat searing her flesh. The pain was so intense that she began to lose her grip. Her hind leg fell into the red hot magma, and she screamed in pain. The scream unnerved Belladonna, and she held on tighter, closing her eyes from the scarring moment. Sakura then appeared in front of them in a flash of light, and immediately started working on her spell to transfer the two dogs back to heaven. Before she could finish, Belladonna's back was being submerged in the magma, and she howled in pain.
"Please! Help us! Hurry!" Annabelle cried. "It hurts! Please!"
"This is gonna sound harsh, but I think a little pain can do this prideful pink biscuit good," Keldeo said with a frown.
"No! Stop! What are you doing? No, you can't do that! That's not fair!" Pouted Red.
Photoshop Flowey: "NO! NOOOOOO! YOU CAN'T DO THAT!"
After a few seconds, Sakura finally got the spell charged, and with a flash of light, all three of them were transported out of the cage and safely into heaven.
Belladonna had begun to feel weightless. This was a strange feeling, one she had never felt before. All around her, she felt a cool, calm wind blowing lightly through her fur. She slowly opened her eyes, her vision blurry at first. As her eyes began to focus, she saw what appeared to be an endless sky, with large pillars surrounded in vines. She felt so at peace, that she didn't want to get up. But she had to find out what had happened, so she slowly got up onto all four paws.
She looked around and saw many familiar faces looking back at her. Charlie, Itchy, Sasha, even Carface was there.
"Wait, Carface?" Keldeo asked in confusion, "So, I guess the Christmas Carol movie is cannon to this fanfic. Huh. Okay then."
Everyone started to huddle around Belladonna as they cheered with excitement. Belladonna gave a confused look. She didn't understand why they would be so happy to see her. Annabelle she had already made amends with, but the others?
"Belladonna. I've wanted to say this for a long time now. Welcome to heaven, my cousin." Annabelle cheered, with a tear rolling down her cheek.
Annabelle then gave Belladonna a hug, and Belladonna returned the favor.
"I-I don't understand. How did I get here?"
"The black list was destroyed." A feminine voice called out.
All the dogs turned their heads towards Sakura.
"From what I've seen the past few weeks, I have come to the conclusion that every dog
should deserve a chance to right their wrongs." Sakura nodded.
"I've learned that too." Annabelle said, as she looked over at her cousin.
"I-I am so honored. You guys have no idea just how grateful I am.." Belladonna whimpered. "I-I'm sorry for all the problems I caused in the past, and I hope you can all forgive me someday."
"We already have Belladonna," Said Charlie. "You did good."
"Considering the kind of person Charlie was originally, this is quite meaningful coming from him," Keldeo remarked.
Annabelle placed her paw on Belladonna's back and a bright light appeared from behind her shoulders. Two large angelic wings appeared from behind her. Belladonna gasped in excitement at her new wings. She flew around the vicinity, elated and euphoric. She cheered, and then caught her cousin in a hug.
"Thank you so much! This is the greatest moment in my entire life." Belladonna cried.
Belladonna and Annabelle's relationship leveled up to 49: Together forever
All the dogs cheered together as they all rejoiced with Belladonna and her cousin. After all that Belladonna had gone through, she had truly earned the trust and respect of those around her. She had never felt so loved and respected in such a long time. For the first time in her life, she was truly at peace.
The end.
"And that was Unredeemable! And what did we learn?" Keldeo asked rhetorically, "We learned that Annabelle REALLY stinks at her job! First she lets Charlie rewind his life watch and put his soul at risk, then she lets Carface steal the Horn of Gabriel, and then she writes up a pointless blacklist. And I say pointless because anyone bad enough to go on that list wouldn't be in the running to be freed from Hell in the first place. The dog angels would clearly see their terrible and not bother with them. They don't need to be on a list, not to mention that someone like Annabelle could make an emotional decision and put someone on it who has no business being on there. Annabelle should retire and let Sakura take over her duties. Everyone would be better off."
Keldeo cracked a smile and said, "Okay, but seriously, this story was really good. There were plenty of action packed moments, with Belladonna and Crystal fighting demons and then saving the puppies from the. . .evil. . .puppy trafficking. . . bulldogs. Crystal was a very good and hopeful character, and Sakura was a nice, strong, sensible moral center to the story. I also like how neither Belladonna nor Annabelle were entirely in the right or entirely in the wrong. Neither character was unredeemable, and both of them repented and were forgiven. It's a very nice and touching message that really brought these two characters to the forefront."
Keldeo grinned and said, "And I know I made a lot of video game reference during this review. Probably because of how awesome Hades by Supergiant Games is. I still think a rogue-like game, or even an adventure story of Crystal and Belladonna, or Annabelle and Belladonna fighting demons and wraiths in Hell with Red as the final boss could be really cool, with them finally escaping back to Heaven during the End Times as a perfect epilogue."
Keldeo shrugged, "But whatever. I think the real accomplishment here is how much this story really emulates the style of Don Bluth's films. So much of the imagery here seems taken right out of his world. Especially the scene where the front of subway turns into Red's face. This fanfic so was so good, it is now my head cannon that this was the true All Dogs Go To Heaven 3. It fits, and it works. In my opinion at least."
Keldeo smiled and said, "Well, I'm Keldeo the Critic. I review it so you don't have to."
The End
Credits
Hades by Supergiant Games
Undertale by Toby Fox
Miitopia by Nintendo
Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney by Capcom
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic by Hasbro
Special Thanks
TinyURL
Miitopia Wiki