The children were ecstatic to be home. They cheered and screamed in excitement when they ran off the train. Some hugged their father first, some hugged Maria first, then they all switched. The older ones minded their manners and greeted the Baroness, but the little ones couldn't control the placement of their excitement. Maria felt a tinge of sadness for the Baroness when she appeared a bit hurt, but shook the thought from her head. She could only do what she could to prepare the children for a new mother, the Baroness would have to do her part too.
The drive home was utter madness. Maria opted to sit in the backseat while Liesl sat in the front with Gretl on her lap. She didn't like the idea of physically sitting between the Captain and the Baroness; too much irony in that. But she very much regretted her decision with the energy that overwhelmed her small frame in the backseat. The children were completely wild with excitement.
Supper was more of the same, and she had to wonder if they had been allowed to burn any energy at all on their trip. Had their grandparents simply made them sit still the entire time? It wouldn't have surprised her given the way the children had to be taught how to play when she arrived. The high society lifestyle when children were involved baffled her more than anything.
Bedtime was better, but she found herself exhausted by the time she closed the door to the last bedroom. She sighed, leaning against the wall for a moment and taking in the silence. Her ears were buzzing from the constant noise, and it felt relieving to relax herself for a moment. She had already decided that she needed to take the children to her mountain the next day to burn some energy. They needed to run around for a bit. Not to mention that she wanted to catch up after missing them more than she had expected.
She heard the Captain clear his throat as he walked down the hallway toward his bedroom, presumably to turn in early, as he loudly stated he would during supper. While she wasn't well-versed in romance, she knew exactly what he was telling her. He didn't meet her eyes when she looked his way, but she could tell he noticed her and was inviting her to his bed, as he didn't let the door close all the way behind him.
And there was her dilemma. If she followed him, she would be agreeing to an affair. She would be agreeing to go to his bed without the promise of anything other than his body, giving him hers willingly and without abandon. She would be going to him knowing exactly what they were doing was wrong and immoral, and that she would be helping him hurt someone he was supposed to be pledging his life to.
Her feet moved down the hallway without her permission, and she looked around to make sure no one saw her there. It didn't matter what she told herself, how much she scolded herself for the woman she had suddenly become, she knew she wasn't going to stop herself from accepting him. Her body ached for him, even though it had only been a day since they were last together.
Looking around one last time to make certain she wasn't seen, she pushed open his door and stepped inside. As soon as she closed and locked the door, he was there. He grasped her chin in his hand and brought her lips to his, rougher than he had been before, but she found that she quite liked it. She wrapped her arms around his neck in response, sighing into his kiss and pulling him close.
Their hands were quick to work on one another's clothing as they made their way toward the bed, her dress immediately sent to the floor. Shoes were kicked off, his jacket was thrown to a chair, she couldn't keep track of anything besides the fact that she needed him inside of her immediately. His thoughts must have been the same, as he tossed her upon his bed and mounted her as soon as they made it there, his hot skin blazing against hers as they rushed to remove their underclothes and bare themselves completely to one another.
He entered her swiftly, both of them gasping at the feeling of their incredibly tight connection. Kissing his way down her neck, he began to thrust. She eagerly met his hips with her own, surprised by how much better it all felt without the mystery and nerves behind her first time, not to mention there was no pain. There was only a soft, gentle pleasure. He moved a hand through her hair, down her cheek, finally stopping to caress one of her breasts, running a thumb over her erect nipple. She brought his lips to her own and kissed him hard, penetrating his mouth with her tongue.
The way he moved, the way he touched her, set her completely on fire. Sweat formed on their bodies, causing their skin to slide together in a most stimulating way, contrasting nicely with their slippery connection. He bit her lip gently as he pulled away from their kiss, and he met her passion-filled eyes with his own. She felt like he was looking into her soul, and she felt incredibly bare and vulnerable before him as he sped up their pace.
He placed a hand behind one of her knees, bringing it closer to her chest. A jolt ran through her stomach at the new angle, as her legs were opened wider to him. He reached between them and moved a finger over her as he thrust, making circles against her most sensitive places. Her body convulsed, a breathy moan escaping her lips as everything crashed around her. She thought her heart would burst out of her chest, her body weak. He thrust a bit harder, and just as her climax was reaching its peak, he came as well, whispering her name in a sigh. Their connection throbbed as they continued to move through the pleasure coursing through them, bodies moving as if they had been together a million times before.
When the waves subsided, he relaxed on top of her, pressing lazy kisses to her lips and face. Her eyes were closed, her breathing difficult, as she came down from her intense high. Being with him was like nothing she could have ever imagined.
"Are you okay, Maria?" His breathless voice speaking her name made her smile, and she opened her eyes to meet his. He was close to her face, looking deeply at her. She moved her lips to his, kissing him fully before meeting his eyes once more.
"Wonderful." He smiled, pulling out of her body and lying upon his back next to her as the cool air of the room caressed their heated bodies. She moved to rest an arm over her head and let out a deep breath, and he chuckled.
"You really are incredible." She laughed, wanting to tell him that surely he was the one who made it all so incredible. With her lack of experience, she wasn't sure she would know the difference.
"I have no idea what I'm doing." The words held many different meanings, and they stayed silent for a moment before she turned to face him. "You have more to lose. Do you know what you're doing?"
"No, I don't." He sighed, reaching down to take her hand in his, bringing it to his lips for a soft kiss. "It's selfish of me, but I know I don't want to stop."
"An affair? It will end badly, I'm afraid." He rolled to face her, placing a gentle kiss upon her lips.
"Do you want to stop?" It was a loaded question for her, one she had asked herself from the moment she knew she would come to his bed again. She sighed, biting her lip. To continue under current terms, or lack thereof, would be more than disastrous.
"If I say yes, I'll be lying to us both. If I say no, I'll be doing something I know is wrong on many levels."
"I would never pressure you to do something you don't want to do." She smiled, kissing his lips once more.
"I know you wouldn't. It's me I'm having trouble facing." He nodded, a look of understanding in his eyes. She had wanted to be a nun since she was a teenager, and in the course of her employ as his governess, all of her plans had been ruined. And she had no one to blame but herself. She knew he would have never pursued her if she hadn't invited him. He had plans of his own, of course.
"Then I will let you decide what happens next. You know how I feel." She nodded, though unsure if that was exactly true.
"It wouldn't mean a thing to me, you know. Outside of bed." He raised his eyebrows, perhaps questioning her motives, she wasn't sure. She didn't want to lie to him. She liked him, she was drawn to him, but there were no feelings of love toward him that she could identify.
"Then it sounds as if your decision is made." She shrugged, wishing it were that easy. She had no idea what she wanted.