Chapter 11: Hocus Pocus

"I'm perfectly fine, Kobayashi-san. There's really no ne-"

"Are you stupid or something!?" I wince as Kobayashi shouts at me as she pushes me into her car, joining her in my little brow beating is little Kanna. Who seems most puzzled by my adamant refusal to go to a hospital.

"It's no real concern." I try to explain, evidently she's having none of it.

"Your arm is messed up!" She points at the offending limb "It's bleeding everywhere, go are going to a hospital and you are getting that looked at, even if I have to drag you there myself!"

I let out a sigh as I'm practically bundled into the car, I turn to see Lucoa giving me a guilty glance "Sorry, Shirou-san. I should have been more careful." she rubs the back of her head.

I wave her off "It's fine, I'd rather I get hurt than someone else." I'm instantly smacked in the back of the head when I say that, I turn to see a rather irritated Kobayashi with a raised hand "What?"

She exhales and places her hands on the steering wheel "I give up with you." she shakes her head then turns to the other "Kanna-chan, Tohru, are you coming?"

"Right!" They both exclaim then bundle themselves into the back of the car.

I would have said the drive to the hospital wasn't awkward.

But it was, especially when we got stuck in traffic on the way there.

"There's really no need for this." I try to convince her again "It'll heal on its own."

"What?" She turns to me with an unamused expression "More of your Houdini tricks?"

"I did say I was a magus…"

"I thought you meant pulling rabbits out of a hat or bending spoons!" She throws her hands up "Not...whatever that was!"

"What was that anyway?" I turn to see Tohru looking at me with an inquisitive gaze "I haven't really seen anything take one of Quetzalcoatl-san's hits before."

"...A shield." I mumble.

"A shield." Kobayashi repeats, then making a rather obvious gesture to my arm "Wasn't a very good one, was it?"

"In fairness, it wasn't supposed to break." I try to offer up, she doesn't deign me with a reply "Okay, it wasn't as good as it could have been, I was kind of in a rush."

"As it could have been?" I turn back to Tohru and nod.

"I didn't really have enough time to project it, kind of a rush job." I shake my head "Anyway, I've always healed fast, a break like this will be gone in a day maybe a little more."

"You'll forgive me if I'd rather have you seen by a professional than rely on something as crazy as magic." Kobayashi deadpans, I scratch my head and let out an awkward chuckle.

"Is all human magic like that?" Tohru asks again, looking rather confused.

"No." Myself and Kobayashi answer at the same time.

"Shirou." I shift my gaze over to Kanna, the girl looking down "Sorry."

I blink in confusion "For what?"

"My fault." She replies "Tripped over, Shirou got hurt." she starts sniffling, I cringe and look over to Kobayashi who is equally uncomfortable.

"It's fine, Kanna-chan." The girl looks up at me and I give her my best smile "It was an accident, nobody was responsible."

"That's right, Kanna!" Tohru exclaims "It was just an unfortunate accident!"

"By the way, Tohru." She turns to me, I give her a smile "You're banned from the kitchen for a week."

She freezes at that, then gapes at me "H-huh!? Why!? What did I do wrong!?"

I raise an eyebrow "You mean aside from starting a destructive dodgeball match in a public park and throwing around enough power to level the surrounding area?"

"...Oh…" She fidgets then turns to Kobayashi "Kobayashi-san! Surely you won't ban me from the Kitchen!?

She's silent for a few moments before she turns to me "...You're gonna cook once your arm is healed up, right?"

"Kobayashi-san!"

I nod "As soon as I'm able." she hums in thought for a few moments.

"Maybe we should make it two weeks…" she mutters to herself, I shake my head at the display. Tohru is evidently not taking it too well, I didn't even know dragons could make those kind of wails.

"How long did you say your magic would take to fix that?" Kobayashi gestures to my arm, now in a cast.

"A day. Maybe a day and a half." I reply back, still staring at the foreign object attached to my arm. It's kind of itchy.

"Just...just wear the dam thing until your healed up." She shakes her head as we head back to the car. Fortunately the doctors didn't tell her about my extensive nerve damage which would likely have killed a normal person… or at the very least crippled them.

"I told you, it would be fine." I nod to her "Besides, it was only a minor break. Nothing too serious."

That seems to convince her not to bring up the issue again, we're only a few feet until the car.

"Emiya."

"Holy Sh-!" I almost let out a swear as I turn to the side, Fafnir is standing there. Somehow having snuck up on us without our noticing. I didn't even smell him, how is it for a being who absolutely wreaks of old metal and something foul he can get the jump on me?

"What the heck!" Kobayashi lets out an equal startled cry as the dragon seemingly manifests next to us, the only ones unsurprised are Tohru and Kanna.

"Can I…" I get my breathing back under control "Can I help you, Fafnir-san?"

"Yes...that spell." He narrows he eyes, then leans in towards me "A curious thing...I have never witnessed something like that before."

"R-really?" I lean away from him and swallow "That doesn't really surprise me."

"You misunderstand. While my focus has been on curses, I still have minor knowledge on spells...that was no spell, was it?"

I don't answer him, years on ingrained practice on clamping my jaw shut when asked about my Magecraft kicking in.

"You need not answer…" He speaks again "I simply found it curious...the feel of that shield you produced was remarkably similar to something I encountered before, when I last entered the human realm…"

"Is that so?"

"Yes… Although that man wielded a sword and drove me away to steal my treasure…"

I freeze...Oh, he's taking about Siegfried isn't he? Or at least this version of Siegfried…

"I see…" I nod to him.

"Perhaps we shall speak of this again...I'm curious as to what such an item is and how it relates to the sword." With that, Fafnir turns away and simply strolls down the street.

"That guy kind of gives me the creeps." Kobayashi mutters to herself, then turns to me "What were you two talking about?"

"Magic…" I shrug at her "Also I suspect I'll be getting a visit from him in the future...My luck really is terrible."

Kobayashi snorts "I'll say."

"Shirou." I once again turn to Kanna, whose now standing directly next to me "Will you bake cookies when you can?"

I chuckle "Sure...I'll back some cookies in a couple days."

Trying to work with a cast was...difficult to say the least. Every single moment I had the thing on I was tempted to simply rip it off. It wasn't that the arm was still injured, I suspected that it was virtually healed but people had already seen it, explaining why I simply ripped the cast off my broken arm wouldn't be very good. I'm not as talented at Tohsaka when it comes to hypnosis.

"Emiya…" I turn to see my boss standing in the door way, frowning at me "I believe I already told you not to come into work today."

"Satoru-san." I begin "It's not that bad, I'm still capable of working."

"No excuses, Emiya." He shakes his head "I'm not gonna risk my best cook because he's too much of a workaholic to take a break when he's injured. Get going home, I'll just have to figure something else out for the rest of the day."

I sigh, he's not going to let this go. Shaking my head I resign myself to the next few days of doing nothing. The sooner I get this stupid cast off the better.

"Tohru-san?" I raise an eyebrow at the person standing outside the pub as I leave, she spots me and waves me over to her "How'd you know I was here?"

"Kobayashi-san said that you don't like it if you aren't working." She replies, I haven't even known Kobayashi that long and she's already figured me out? "...Also you weren't in your apartment when I entered it."

"...I'm sorry?" I think I heard something outrageous there "Did you say 'entered it'?"

"Yes." She smiled at me, as if she did nothing wrong "I just teleported into your apartment. It was actually harder than I expected."

I'd hope so, I set up bounded fields to specifically prevent teleportation into it precisely because I didn't know if you could do it.

"Couldn't you have just knocked on the door?"

"...No."

I sigh and shake me head "Regardless, what can I help you with Tohru-san?"

"Fafnir-san has decided to stay in the human world." She explains "He tried living in the mountains…"

"Wait? Was he the reason there was a news report on last night?"

"We're trying to find somewhere for him to live." She completely ignores me "So I suggested he stay with Kobayashi-san and myself."

"She said no, I'm guessing?"

"Right." She nods "So then I suggested he live with you!" she beams, I feel the blood leaving my face.

"I see." I simply reply "How did he react to this suggestion?"

She then frowns "He said no to that as well, he doesn't want to disturb the 'natural habitat of an unusual magical specimen' or something."

Oh...oh dear…

"So… you want me to help you, help him, find a place?"

"Yes."

I hum in thought "He seemed to get along with Takiya-san, if I recall." then give her an inquisitive stare "He's not going to kill him, is he?"

"No." She shakes her head "Fafnir actually would probably get along with that human maggot...I mean Kobayashi-san's co-worker."

"Speaking of which, why are you out today?" I'll try to ignore her obvious hatred for the poor man who has done very little to deserve it. I already know she'd never going to let it go.

"Hmm?" She blinks at me, then snaps her fingers "That's right! I need your help to make Fafnir-san a convincing human."

"...When I said I was a magus, I meant that I could perform minor tricks. Not miracles." She shakes her head.

"No, like 'proof of citizenship.' and 'Bank accounts'"

"Oh, you mean an identity." I nod in understanding "Yeah, I can help you with that."

Thank you, part-time mercenary work for that useful skill.

"Come with me." I gesture for her to follow, also slightly thankful I'll have something to do for today "We'll need to establish a name, age, place of birth, parents…" I continue to list off things as Tohru follows me back to my apartment.

"What about the name Ooyama Takeshi?" Tohru gives her suggestion for a name, it's not a bad one.

"I could see it, certainly believable." I nod "How long does Fafnir intend to stay in the human world?"

"...I don't actually know."

I sigh "Well, that'll be something to ask then."

"Emiya-san?" I turn to the girl "How come you know how to do all this stuff?"

"...Hobbies."

"Humans have such useful hobbies for such an inferior species." She hums in thought "Also, can you unban me from the kitchen, please."

"No."

AN: Direct aftermath, also figured that Avalon without Saber around would still heal Shirou fast but not that fast. Also people who were complaining about Rho Aias being broken by a dodgeball.

*Shrugs* Meh. It was a rush job, if he had more than 1/100th of a second I'm sure it would have been better.

Also, thinking of including a Servant in the future.

I will take suggestions. (Not Artoria though. That seemed a little...cliché.)