The Origin of Tom Riddle's Diary
"What are you scared of?"
It was a game the other children used to play in the orphanage. When the adults were asleep, they would creep into Graham's room and sit on the floor, on the desk or perched on the end of his bed. Graham, age 15, was the oldest boy in the orphanage and he was in charge. He used fear to keep the others in line; taunts, Chinese burns, stealing or breaking their things. But no matter how badly he treated them, each night they would flock to his room and join in whatever new game he had devised. He terrified them, but they still all wanted to be in his gang. Ruling by fear isn't enough; you also have to give people an incentive, a reason to want to follow you, otherwise they inevitably rebel. Graham struck a near perfect balance; he stole sweets from the local shop and gave them to his favourites. He got them to do his chores and homework and allowed those who performed best to walk into town with him. He was popular with the staff, playing the golden-haired, helpful, kindly mentor, and used this to influence the adults' opinions of the children; praising them and gaining them treats, or inventing misdemeanours and earning them punishment. He kept a log of the children's actions in a small, black diary, assigning and deducting points almost at random. The children all bought into this scheme, giving him all the power he needed. So Graham played them off one another, carefully circulating rumours and lies which meant they could never trust each other. So, naturally, they never even thought to unite against him. I learnt a lot from Graham and his games. I learnt that Amy and Dennis were scared of heights and small spaces respectively. I learnt that Billy was scared of his rabbit dying. I learnt that Alice was scared of the dark and Liam was scared of spiders. I learnt how far you can push people before they snap. After Graham left, walking out of the orphanage just before he turned 16, I put into practice all I had learnt. I found that ruling by fear was easy, but manipulating the staff was harder; I was no golden boy, and because I was 'different' - although I prefer to say 'special' - the adults distrusted me. But I had another chance, and by the time I got to Hogwarts, I had perfected my technique. It's ironic, now I come to think of it, how Lord Voldemort owes many of the secrets of his success to a teenage Muggle.
"What are you scared of?"
I introduced Graham's game amongst my peers at Hogwarts. The usual suspects which terrified the children at the orphanage had no effect on me; insects, snakes, clowns, the dark. Even in the Wizarding World, the main fears seemed laughable to me; werewolves, inferi, dragons, the dark (again), spiders (again) even snakes! People have so little imagination. They are ignorant of their own insignificance; they imagine they are unique, but each fit comfortably into predictable behavioural patterns which makes it almost too easy for someone like me. All I had to do was memorise the patterns, see where each person fit and it was as if I had a key to their mind. Hogwarts makes it even simpler by grouping people into one of four Houses with distinct character traits. After years studying human behaviour, learning Legilimency came naturally to me. But I digress. You wish to know what I fear? Very well.
Kicking the bucket, popping one's clogs, falling asleep, passing on, entering eternal rest, but no matter which pretty words they give it, death is still death. The end. Game over. The body rots away under the ground and the soul is extinguished; gone for good. When I was in the orphanage, I would practice holding my breath for as long as possible at night in case I ever was at risk of drowning. I walked the long way to school to avoid crossing the busy main road (which the other children ran across, shrieking with glee.) I got in trouble with Mrs Cole more times than I care to remember for refusing to eat the meat and fish I knew had been sitting out in the warm kitchen for hours. I value my life too much to throw it away. Every breath I take, each beat of my heart is precious. I must stay alive. And when I got to Hogwarts, I discovered that magic holds more secrets than most know of. If you are prepared to open your mind, to see past society's controlling labels of 'good' and 'evil' you will discover that there is only power and those too weak to seek it. I have found true power; a way to stay alive.
I made a slight omission earlier, Graham did leave the orphanage like I said, but he had been intending to return. I followed him that day. He used to walk by the Thames on his way into town, usually to shoplift or spend the stolen pocket money of his peers. I had learnt all I needed to from Graham; he was no longer of any use to me. He drowned that day, and I acquired his small black diary. This souvenir will be my first Horcrux, one of seven carefully chosen objects which will house my soul. Thoughts of death will no longer haunt me; I will no longer imagine her creeping up on me. I know now that death will never hold me in her clutches, for I will be immortal.
The End of:
The Origin of Tom Riddle's Diary