Chapter 10: Ten Thousand Three Hundred Fifty-Two Miles Away (Long Distance by Gretta Ray)

Zac's eyes opened slowly and he stared up at the ceiling, trying to get his bearings as he blinked his eyes a couple of times. He looked to his left, finding the other side of the bed empty and as he ran his hand over the sheets, he found them cool. He sat up in bed and looked around the room, finding clothes strewn over the floor but no sign their owner. He swung his feet onto the floor and, grabbing his boxers on his way out of the bedroom, went in search of Lucy.

There was music playing in the living room, the sounds of Yves Simon softly cloaking the apartment, but still no sign of his girlfriend. As Zac made his way into the kitchen, he smiled, finding her in standing in front of the coffee machine, topping up the grind and water before she pressed the start button.

Zac made his way over to her, wrapping his arms around her waist and kissing the side of her neck. "Good morning," he whispered, biting her neck gently and running his stubbly chin against her shoulder, "Did you sleep well?"

Lucy sighed and nodded, "I did…" she paused and turned to face Zac, bringing her arms up around his neck, playing with the hair at the back of his head, "How about you?"

Zac leant down to catch Lucy's lips with his own, "Mmmhmm," he replied, deepening the kiss and squeezing her waist. As he pulled back from her, he kissed her gently once more before he reached up to grab a couple of mugs from the cabinet above the machine, "So what should we have for breakfast? I have… nothing in the fridge, but we could order something."

Lucy chuckled as she ran a hand over Zac's shoulder, "Great minds think alike," she whispered, "I just put in an order for two serves of pancakes from that café down the street."

Zac grinned, turning to grip Lucy's head at the sides and kissing her hard, "You really are the perfect woman," he teased, keeping his lips on hers. He reluctantly pulled away at the sound of knocking at the door, and as he made his way through the kitchen door, he called back to her, "But if you think you're paying, think again."

The knocking repeated and Zac rolled his eyes as he grabbed his wallet, "I'm coming!" he called out, "God it's just pancakes, no need to kick the door in," he mumbled as he made sure that he had enough cash in his wallet. He absentmindedly opened the door without checking the peephole, and his eyes grew wide when he realised, too late, that the knocking wasn't about pancakes.

Hotch's eyes grew wide when the door opened and they were greeted with Zac, dressed only in a pair of boxers. He quickly threw a hand over Jack's eyes as he leant forward to whisper to Zac.

"I really hope she's got some clothes on."

Zac bit his lip and nodded, "But I'm not sure that's going to be enough," he whispered back. Before he could call out to give Lucy a heads up, she came walking out of the kitchen, dressed only in one of Zac's dress shirts. It covered what needed to be covered, but it was nothing close to ideal when there was a six-year-old involved.

"Oh my god!" Lucy groaned, "Zac," she added, quickly placing her very full coffee mug on the dining table and clutching at the bottom of the shirt, trying to make it cover more of her legs as she ran towards Zac's bedroom.

The door slammed shut and Jack wriggled out from behind his dad's hand, "Where did Lucy go?" he asked, running into the apartment in search of his new friend. He disappeared through the kitchen door, calling out Lucy's name.

Zac's jaw dropped and he stood back to let Hotch in, ignoring the smirk that was coming his way as he walked through the door. Hotch might not have been Zac's actual parent, and Zac and Lucy might have been two consenting adult adults, but Zac suddenly felt like he was thirteen again, when his mom had caught him making out with Amy Gilmore out the back of their house in Chicago. He had hoped to never experience that embarrassment ever again, but apparently, he had no such luck.

"I'll just go and throw some clothes on," Zac said, pointing to his closed bedroom door, "There's a fresh pot of coffee if you want some."

Hotch nodded, "Next time I'll call ahead," he joked, resulting in a swat to the arm from Zac, before he headed down the hallway in search of Jack and coffee. Hotch walked into the kitchen, not finding Jack but finding coffee. He helped himself to a fresh cup, and then walked back into the living room, finding Jack sitting on the floor, rifling through the crate of toys that Zac kept in the corner of the little library nook.

"Sorry about that," Zac said, walking up behind Hotch and offering an awkward smile, "We were expecting breakfast, not Hotchners."

Hotch chuckled and shook his head, "Sorry to spoil your morning," he replied, "But we were actually coming to see if you guys wanted to join us at the park."

"Hmm," Zac mused, tapping his finger to his chin as he walked over to Jack, stooping down to lift him up and tickling his sides, "I don't know if I'm cool enough to hang out with Jack… he didn't even say hello to me before."

Jack giggled loudly, squealing when Zac lifted him up and over his shoulder, "I'm sorry!" he squealed, "Hello Zac!"

Zac smiled and stopped his torture, placing the little guy back on the floor, "Oh, so I am cool enough to hang out with you guys at the park?" he asked, grinning at Jack's fervent nod, "Alright then… I'll go and check with Goose."

As Zac stood, Hotch tipped his head to the side and smiled gently, "So things are going well, I take it?" he asked. This was the second weekend trip that Lucy had made to DC, and in between those visits, Zac had been to Philly for overnight visits. So Hotch felt it was a safe assumption.

Zac nodded as he tipped his head towards the kitchen, and after Hotch joined him, Zac started to pour himself a cup of coffee as he contemplated how to answer, "I don't know why, but this time it feels different," he explained, "Maybe it's because we're older… maybe it's because we're both feeling a little more settled, and we're actually in the same place now…" he paused and shrugged, "… I know things will come up eventually, but for now I think we're just enjoying being together."

Hotch nodded, leaning back against the counter and taking a sip of his coffee, "I'm really happy for you bud," he said softly, "After the craziness of the last couple of years, with your Uncle Matt and your mom, you deserve some happiness."

Zac smiled sadly and nodded, "You know…" he paused and shook his head, "Never mind."

"Say what you were going to say," Hotch urged with an encouraging smile, "No need to hold back now."

Zac furrowed his brow and shrugged, "I just wanted you to know that… I mean… if you wanted to, when you're ready…" he groaned, "I just want you to know that if you wanted to date someone new, I would support you. Mom would want you to be happy."

Hotch looked down at his coffee mug and swallowed hard over the lump in his throat, trying to figure out how to word his reply, "I appreciate that, Zac, but…" he paused and let out a sigh, "… I'm just not ready yet."

Zac nodded, "Well… when you are, know that you've got my support," he replied softly, "And a built-in babysitter." He only wanted Hotch to be happy, and since Hotch couldn't be with his mom, Zac at least wanted him to try and find that happiness with someone else.

The two men looked up when they heard Jack calling out Lucy's name and his little footsteps running over the floorboards. They headed out into the living room to find Lucy and Jack huddled together on the floor, enjoying a hug. Lucy was fully dressed this time, in jeans and a striped t-shirt, her hair tied up in a high ponytail.

Lucy looked up when she heard the others walking in and she bit her lip when she looked at Hotch, "I'm really sorry about before," she said softly, "I wasn't expecting you guys."

Hotch smiled and shook his head, "Not a problem," he replied, "But now that you're here, Jack has a question for you." Hotch nodded at Jack, who turned back to Lucy and played nervously with the tip of her ponytail, twisting the hair between his fingers and biting his lip.

"Will you come to the park with us?" Jack asked softly, "Me and Zac can show you how to spin without throwing up and we can kick the ball around."

Lucy bit her lip at Jack's adorable invitation, and she nodded excitedly, "Absolutely!" she exclaimed, tickling Jack's sides and smiling at the giggles that rang out loud, "I'd love to learn how to spin without throwing up."

Zac and Hotch chuckled, the former heading over to the others and holding his hands out to help Lucy up from the floor, then stooping down to lift Jack up onto his shoulders. As Jack's legs dangled onto Zac's chest, there was a knock at the front door, and Zac looked to Lucy and smiled, "That'll be the pancakes."

Hotch pushed the door of the conference room open, startling JJ and Morgan who were sitting at the table, a mess of files in front of them as they tried to find that seemingly invisible thread that would help them to unravel their case. They'd spent two days in Brookhaven already, and they were starting to feel the desperation that came with missing persons cases.

"Everything ok, Hotch?" Morgan asked, studying his friend's face and furrowing his brow with worry, "I mean… besides the obvious?"

"You mean, besides the fact that a woman and child who were attempting to flee their violent husband and father have now been kidnapped by some kind of hired thug?" Hotch asked, staring at the board, "What could possibly be wrong?" He shook his head, immediately regretting his choice of words, and tone, but he couldn't bring himself to apologise. He was tired and far from home and all he wanted was to finish this case.

JJ winced at Hotch's uncharacteristic explosion, and she looked to Morgan and tipped her head towards the door. Morgan nodded, tapping the table before he stood and walked out of the room, closing it gently behind him, figuring that JJ would be better placed to find a way to get Hotch to talk it out.

"Do you want to talk about it?" JJ asked, once she was certain the door was closed. She stood from her seat and made her way over to stand next to Hotch, "What's going on?"

Hotch sighed, "I should go and apologise to Morgan," he said softly, turning to walk away, but he stopped when JJ grabbed his arm.

"I will get her on the phone in the next three seconds, if you don't start talking," JJ murmured, watching Hotch closely, concerned at the worry lines that were deepening with every day that Emily was gone. He'd been taking on more and more in this team, and JJ knew that he'd been spending more time with Zac too... all of it in an effort to keep Emily in his life... at least that was JJ's assumption. Hotch had stopped talking to her about most of it, and that in itself was a problem. Hotch was so closed off from everyone, in a time when he needed to be reaching out.

Hotch huffed at JJ's empty threat, knowing that even if she did have that kind of contact with Emily, there was no way they would jeopardise her safety for this. He shook his head, "I'm fine, JJ," he replied, looking over to her, "Really."

JJ rolled her eyes, turning to face Hotch and crossing her arms across her chest, "Try again," she urged, staring at Hotch and waiting for him to cave. She was really hoping he wouldn't have too much more fight left in him, since she was quickly running out of options. And she certainly couldn't tap into any of the special tactics that Emily had used with Hotch… they weren't that close.

Hotch ran a hand over his mouth and shook his head, "I was just talking with Chelsea's parents and they told me that I'd never understand what it feels like to have someone you love go missing…" he paused and looked down at his shoes, before he glanced up in JJ's direction, "… I'm not about to share my personal life with a victim's family, but… JJ sometimes it feels like we'll never get her back."

JJ furrowed her brow and reached over to squeeze Hotch's arm, relieved that he hadn't fought her too hard on this one. She stayed silent as she contemplated what reply would help Hotch, but she was stumped. She had no idea what to say to help Hotch feel better about this situation, because so far, there had been nothing that helped her feel better. Her best friend was stuck in Paris, waiting to come back to the life that she'd left behind, while every person she loved believed, or at least had to pretend, that she had been killed. At least they all had each other to lean on. JJ knew that she and Hotch had each other to lean on when the knowledge of what had actually happened to Emily started to weigh on them. And the whole team was supporting each other, helping each other through this horrible time.

But Emily was on her own, half a world away.

Sharing that thought with Hotch was definitely not an option, not in his current state, so JJ put it out of her mind. She needed to focus on figuring out a way to help him, because she knew that he wouldn't be able to focus on the case if he didn't move past this. And Hotch would never forgive himself if he was so distracted by his situation with Emily that it cost Chelsea and Georgia their lives.

It was in that moment that JJ realised how she could help.

"Hotch," she started, waiting for him to look up at her, "Instead of thinking about the worst-case scenario, maybe think about what you want when Emily comes back to us… because she will come back…" JJ paused and smiled sadly, "… and I think you know what you want to happen. And that's what you have to focus on."

Hotch nodded gently, still not ready to follow JJ's suggestion, but knowing that he needed to shift his headspace to focus on this case. A missing mother and child were more important than his wallowing.

"Are you really going to try, or are you just trying to get me off your back?" JJ asked, holding back from touching Hotch, certain that any physical contact might backfire given his current state-of-mind. Maybe after the case was over and they were on their way back home, JJ might be able to reach out to him again, but for now, she had to give him some space.

Hotch nodded more enthusiastically this time, "I'll try," he replied softly, looking over to his friend and pursing his lips, "Thank you JJ."

JJ nodded, "Ok, well I say we go and round up the team and figure out how to find Chelsea and Georgia," she replied, tipping her head to the door, "You take a minute and I'll go outside and grab the others."

Hotch nodded again, watching JJ leave the room before he turned to lean against the table, hanging his head and taking a deep breath. This case, this mother and child, couldn't afford for him to have a nervous breakdown. He would give himself this moment to pull himself back together, but after that, he needed to be Agent Hotchner again. Aaron had no place in this room, and he certainly had no place taking personally the natural response from Chelsea's terrified parents.

Hotch stood up straight and took in a deep breath, holding his stomach as he let the breath out. He repeated the process a couple more times, feeling the stress leaving his body. As the door opened, he dropped his hand to his side and nodded to Morgan as he walked through the door, followed by the others.

"Ok guys," he said sternly, "What do we have?"

Hotch made his way out of the elevator, leading Chelsea's parents down the corridor towards the room where Chelsea and Georgia were recovering. When they reached the door, Hotch stopped and held up his hand, dropping his voice to a whisper.

"They're pretty dehydrated and they have some marks on their wrists from where they were restrained," Hotch explained, "I'm not saying this to shock you, but to prepare you."

Phillip nodded, reaching up to squeeze Christy's shoulder as he looked through the small window, "Just tell me that you've caught the bastard."

Hotch nodded, "Chelsea's ex-husband is in custody, as is the man he paid to kidnap them," he explained, gesturing to two uniform police standing behind them, "These officers will need to interview Chelsea and Georgia again soon, but for now, you can spend some time with them."

Christy launched herself at Hotch, squeezing him tight at the waist and sobbing against his chest, "Thank you, Agent Hotchner," she said softly, her tears of joy soaking through Hotch's shirt.

Hotch smiled sadly at Phillip as he stepped back from Christy, "You're welcome," he said softly, tipping his head towards the door, "You can go in and see them now."

He turned and watched as Phillip and Christy made their way into the room, finding Chelsea and Georgia sharing a bed, finding comfort with each other after their ordeal. The family embraced in a mess of limbs and tears, and Hotch felt his heart constrict at the sight. These were the moments that he enjoyed most in his work, rescuing victims before they lost their lives and reuniting families.

"I'll never get bored of that sight."

Hotch turned his head and nodded as Rossi came to stand next to him.

"The team did a good job on this one," Rossi continued, "It could have ended very differently, but everyone came together, and we got them both back safe."

Hotch nodded again, "We've got a good team," he replied softly, watching the family smile and cry together.

"Yeah," Rossi added, "We do…" he sighed and shook his head, "… and we have space for one more."

Hotch closed his eyes and looked down at the floor, shaking his head, "It's too soon, Dave."

Rossi furrowed his brow, "It's always going to be too soon, but you know what the brass is like. If they see that we're functioning without a seventh team member, they're going to take the budget away. Or worse…" he paused and shook his head, "Strauss will find someone to put on the team and you won't have a say in it."

"I understand all of that, Dave," Hotch replied sternly, "But we can't just replace Emily… that's not how it works."

"You did good work with Chelsea's parents, but Aaron," Rossi urged, shaking his head, "You're putting too much pressure on yourself to fill her shoes. I know you cared about Emily... and you know I loved her, but at some point we need to fill that empty seat."

Hotch huffed and shook his head, "We need to go find the rest of the team," he replied, nothing subtle in his attempt to change the subject, "I'll go and call the flight crew if you can get the others ready to leave…" he paused and bit his lip, "… I'll see you at the station."

As the final words were leaving his mouth, Hotch turned and walked away, knowing that there was truth in what Rossi was saying, but he couldn't bring himself to make that decision. He was still holding out hope that they would get a lead on Doyle and Emily could finally come home, not that he could explain that to Rossi. And it was that last part of the situation that was weighing on Hotch tonight. He knew that, if he told Rossi what was really going on, he would help them figure out a way to stall the decision. But that wasn't an option, so for now, Hotch was on his own, delicately traversing the thin line between the two worlds.

Rossi stayed put as Hotch walked away from him, pushing his way through the exit to the emergency room. He wondered if he'd been right all along, that Emily was still alive and Hotch's avoidance in filling her position was because she would be coming back, as soon as it was safe. He'd been a profiler for longer than some of the team had been alive, and he had caught onto a few inconsistencies in the past few months. Tail-ends of conversations between Hotch and JJ and other observations that Rossi had been cataloguing since Emily's death.

It wasn't something he'd ask Hotch, but he wondered if maybe he could dig a little with JJ.

Since she'd come back to the BAU, Rossi had noticed JJ and Hotch having secret conversations, changing the subject when Rossi or one of the others walked into the room. He couldn't imagine what they might be talking about that the others couldn't hear, unless it was something to do with Emily. Rossi had been logging his observations, but he still wasn't sure if he was adding 2 and 3 and coming up with 6. He needed something more substantial than suspicions.

As he headed down the hall in the same direction as Hotch, Rossi made a mental note to invite JJ and her family around for dinner soon. A carb-and-cabernet coma might just be enough to get JJ to share her secrets.

Hotch waved to Jessica as she reversed her car out of the garage, heading home after a long few days of sharing Jack-duties with Zac while Hotch had been in Mississippi. He had just returned to DC that afternoon and hadn't stuck around in the office for long before he headed home. He managed to get home in time to spend some quality time with Jack before bedtime, which was a welcome relief after their case in Brookhaven. Jessica had stayed for dinner, Hotch feeling like he could treat her to a home-cooked meal that she didn't need to prepare herself, and as the night wore on, he had found himself enjoying casual conversation with his sister about regular life stuff.

Hotch closed the garage door behind him and made his way through the yard, picking up Jack's toys along the way and making a mental note to talk to Jack about what constituted indoor and outdoor playthings. He walked up the stairs, making his way through the back door and locking it behind him, and as he walked through the living room and dining room, he switched off lights and picked up more toys. Realising that there was nothing else to keep him upstairs, Hotch found his way down to his bedroom to change into his pyjamas, before he walked down the hall to his home-office.

Leaving Quantico at a reasonable hour had been a luxury, and he'd been able to spend more time with Jack than he normally would on any other Thursday night, but now that Jack was in bed and he had time to himself, Hotch had work to catch up on. If he didn't finish the case file soon enough, they'd catch another case and he'd get caught behind on the paperwork, and with Strauss still out of action, even more of the work fell to him. For tonight though, getting through the post-case reporting would be sufficient.

He dropped into the chair behind his desk and opened his laptop, signing in quickly and opening up the reporting program so he could start on the case file from their investigation in Brookhaven. Hotch started with the records of interviews, updating the files sent by the team and adding them to the report, before he approved the SDM tools and the tactical plans they'd agreed on before their raid on the building where they had finally found Chelsea and Georgia... and the man who had kidnapped them.

Just as Hotch was saving the final report, there was a knock at door that lead to the front stoop, and when he looked up, he found Zac standing there, smiling wide. Hotch stood from his desk and made his way over, smiling at Zac through the glass before he opened the door.

Zac held up a six-pack of cold beer and smiled, "A little welcome home party, if you've got time," he said brightly, hoping his visit wasn't an inconvenience. He'd kind of missed having Hotch around and thought that sharing a beer or two might be a good excuse to hang out. Zac had been driving Jack to his friend's house for a sleepover a couple of nights earlier and had realised how much his new family was starting to mean to him. Hanging out with Jack, cooking dinner with Jessica, and conversations with Hotch about everything from favourite flavours of ice-cream to his relationship with Lucy - these were all things that made Zac feel less alone in the world, like he had when he'd first lost his mom.

Hotch chuckled and nodded, stepping aside for Zac to walk in before he closed and locked the door behind them, "I've always got time for you, Zac," he replied, gesturing towards the hall, "Why don't we go out the back?"

"You're sure I'm not interrupting?" Zac asked, nodding towards Hotch's desk, noticing his open laptop and pile of paperwork.

Hotch shook his head, walking over and closing his laptop, "Not at all," he replied, "Come on… I could do with a beer," he urged, starting towards the hallway, Zac following him through his bedroom and out onto the back patio.

As they took their seats on the large sofa, enjoying the slowly cooling August night, Zac handed a beer to Hotch and placed the carton on the table in front of him. He looked over at Hotch and, noticing the fatigue on his face, Zac offered a crooked smile.

"Tough case?" he asked, cracking open his beer and taking a sip. He knew all of their cases were tough, but some were worse than others. He'd figured that much out from the rare occasions when his mom had actually debriefed with him, when she'd end up crying herself to sleep, or worse, being completely void of emotions. In moments like that he'd pour her a glass of wine, switch on some good music, and make her dance with him in the living room.

Hotch shrugged, taking a sip of his own drink, "Not any more than usual, but… just a lot of moments to miss your mom," he replied, biting his lip at the sadness that quickly flitted across Zac's face and feeling guilty for the unintentional upset, "Sorry..."

Zac shook his head, "Anything in particular triggering that?" he asked, knowing that at some point, Hotch would move on with his life, but for now he kind of enjoyed hearing how much his mom had meant to this man. He took it as a compliment, that someone as decent as Hotch had loved his mom so much that she was so active in his mind these months later. He'd always hoped that she would find someone to love her like that, and even though he lamented the fact that they'd never been able to make anything of it, it didn't take away from the fact that Emily Prentiss had been loved.

Hotch nodded, "Yeah… I suppose... she was always really good at getting victims to trust her, get them to talk to her... especially kids..." he paused and shrugged, "… I don't know, I guess there are a lot of things to miss, and this case just brought most of them up again."

Zac nodded and smiled sadly, "I guess I never thought about how some of the things that made her such an amazing mom would also make her a good agent…" he paused, "… She was an incredible mom."

Hotch bit his lip and nodded, raising his eyebrows and glancing over at Zac, "So how was your week?" he asked, trying to change the subject from what could prove to be a dangerous line of conversation, "Did you finish that big project you were working on?" he continued, "It was on water filtration devices right?"

Zac nodded and bit his lip, impressed that Hotch had remembered something so comparatively trivial, "Yeah, I did. My supervisor was really pleased with the results and we're looking at multiple applications for the research..." he huffed and blushed slightly, "I'm sorry if this is boring for you... I find it exciting, but I'm sure not everyone does."

Hotch rolled his eyes, "I do find it exciting," he replied, "You're passionate about something, and that's rare. And if it's important to you, it's important to me."

Zac tipped his head and smiled, "Did Jack tell you that he came to work with me one day?" he asked, watching Hotch's face for a reaction.

Hotch furrowed his brow and shook his head, "He told me he went to college, but didn't give me any more details," he replied, repeating the version of the story that Jack had told him earlier, but still feeling the need for a little more context.

Zac shrugged and grinned, "Jess had to go into the office on Tuesday, and since I was teaching a class it was easier to just take Jack with me. He hung out in the front row of my classroom with a colouring book and puzzles, and at one point he got up and interrupted the class to ask me if we could go outside and throw the frisbee. My students loved him, so I think I may have to take him with me again," he explained with a chuckle.

Hotch shook his head and smiled sadly, "I'm so sorry... I really need to figure out some other back-up babysitters for when I'm out of town."

"Nonsense," Zac replied, reaching over to swat Hotch's knee, "You know I love hanging out with Jack. It's never a burden."

Hotch nodded, taking a sip of his beer and studying Zac's face. Apparently, he was telling the truth, but that didn't stop the guilt from setting in at the thought of what it meant for Zac and Jessica to put everything aside to look after Jack. Hotch had been thinking a lot about it lately, with the thought of Emily coming back and the possibility of them making something more out of their friendship. He wondered if changing his work situation could be a win-win: he could spend more time with Jack and the rules that had stopped him from telling Emily how he felt would no longer be a barrier.

Hotch shook his head, he was getting ahead of himself. They needed to find Doyle first, bring Emily home, and then he could think about turning his world upside down. He raised his eyebrows and looked over at Zac, "So what else has been going on?" Hotch asked, "Did Lucy get back to Philly alright?"

Zac nodded, pursing his lip, "Yeah... she joined me and Jack at the park one more time before she left yesterday," he replied.

A content smile grew on Hotch's face as he watched Zac carefully, "And when do you think we'll be seeing her again?" he asked, knowing that even though the distance made things difficult, Zac seemed to be exceedingly happy in his rekindled relationship. It made Hotch happy to know that Zac was moving forward, and he liked Lucy. She was incredible with Jack, she seemed to be ok with the disgusting games the boys played, but she could also be gentle and had been the one that Jack had cuddled up with for a nap when they'd come back to the house after their morning at the park earlier in the week.

Zac chuckled at Hotch's teasing, "Probably not for another few weeks unfortunately. Although I think Jack was more upset at the news than I was," he explained with a smile, "She's starting her new job on Monday, so she's gone back to settle into her new apartment before she starts."

Hotch smiled and nodded, "Well it's good to see you happy," he replied, "But fair warning, if you need any advice, it might be best to ask someone else," Hotch teased, "I'm not exactly an expert when it comes to romance."

"Oh, come on Dad," Zac replied, "You did alright with Mom." He knew he was taking a chance and testing out the use of the term of endearment, but that's all he was doing... testing the waters. As the week had progressed, he'd been using the term to refer to Hotch in his conversations with Lucy and Jack, and he was feeling increasingly comfortable with thinking of Hotch in that role. He was certainly more attentive than Zac's actual father... in fact, in the four months that they'd first met, Zac had spent more cumulative time with Hotch than he ever had with his father.

Hotch shook his head incredulously as he spoke up, rousing Zac from his thoughts, "I'm not sure what your mom told you, but I definitely screwed that one up."

Zac shrugged, "I heard some stories that suggest otherwise, but I won't break Mom's confidence by sharing them with you," he replied, offering a genuine smile.

Hotch raised an eyebrow, but decided not to go down that track and ask Zac for more detail on the parts of their history that Emily had shared with her son. Instead, Hotch decided to go back to something Zac had said earlier, "I'm not sure if you were just saying that as a joke, but..." he paused and furrowed his brow, "Is the Dad thing something you'd like to stick with?" he asked, watching Zac's face for a reaction.

Zac pursed his lips tight and shrugged, "I don't really know... I mean, I suppose you've become kind of like a dad in a way, and..." he paused and shook his head, "... aside from my grandparents, I don't really have any other family, but I..." he sighed and chuckled nervously, "I feel like I'm screwing this up."

Hotch smiled softly and shook his head, "You're doing better than you think you are."

Zac nodded, "I never really needed a dad, because Mom was... well... Mom," he explained, "But if you're cool with it, I wouldn't mind calling you Dad."

Hotch nodded and bit the inside of his lip, "It's ok with me," he replied softly, huffing and frowning in jest, "So long as you don't call me Daddy… you're a little too old for that."

Zac chuckled and shook his head, taking a sip of his beer, "I'll keep that in mind... Dad."